Reacting vs. Responding | The Mindset Shift That Changes Everything

 Ever found yourself spiraling after sending that text too quickly? Or snapping at someone and immediately regretting it? Same.  In this episode of Generational Tea, we’re talking about the difference between reacting and responding—and why mastering this skill might just change your life. Whether you're navigating high-stress situations, awkward conversations, or everyday annoyances (hi, passive-aggressive emails), how you choose to show up matters. We explore how reactions are fast, emotional, and often unfiltered, while responses come from a place of intention, reflection, and grounded confidence. From learning how to create space between stimulus and response, this episode is full of real talk, laughs, and practical tips. If you’re ready to stop spiraling and start showing up as your best self—even when life tests your patience—this one’s for you. 

• Join the conversation: What areas of your life are you prone to reacting instead of responding? How did your weekly challenge go? Share your reflections in the comments or via our social media.
• What She Said: "Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response". — Viktor Frankl
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• Microphone flags by Impact PBS
• Intro music by Cymatix
• Logo by @makariann 
• Business email: generationalteapod@gmail.com

Transcript

0:12

Hey, how are you? Doing well. Better than I was yesterday, that's all you can ask for some days. Yeah. Yeah. Some days it's just I'm vertical. I'm hateful. I'm a total witch. I'm hormonal. I'm hot. Yes, I am hot. This morning I had to change my shirt twice. Are you serious? I'm serious. Just to go to the chiropractor's office. I had sweat marks under my boobs. Hot flashes immediately. No. Well, it's 98% humidity. That doesn't help. I do sometimes forget it. That little cream I'm supposed to put on, so sometimes that's the problem. But anyways. Girl. Yeah. I don't even know. I'm, I'm talking to Jim. I'm like, we need to go see them sometime in, in June before it gets too, too hot. And then I'm over here sweating at nine o'clock in the morning. Dude, it's already hot here. By June, you're gonna melt. Yeah. it's humid here too. Like I went on a walk outside the other day and I was just wearing like a t-shirt and leggings. It was like. Low eighties, and it wasn't even that sunny. It was like kind of overcast, drenched in sweat. Just from walking? Yeah, just from walking. Yeah. So imagine in 30 years you get outta the shower, which you always end a shower with cold water once you hit 48, that that last little bit of water from the shower should, should be cold because there ain't no taking the temperature down after that. You need some help. So anyways, all right, I'll keep that in mind. Does I get all Yes, yes, yes. Hey, that's free. For those of you that have tuned in, welcome to Generational Tea, your host, Ronnie, and this I'm Kana, and we are so glad you guys. Jumped in on this. We have got a good one for you girls. I know we're all gonna be able to relate and find something that we can do better, you know? Mm-hmm. What I'm saying? So yeah, dude. Yeah. This one is highly relatable because highly, I mean, have you ever found yourself mid rant and You just have a moment, you're like, maybe I should have just gone to therapy instead. Exactly. It would've been cheaper than all the flowers and the meals that I'm gonna have to bring to my friends and or family that I have just put on the defense because I'm stupid. So, yes. Mm-hmm. I definitely, woo. I got some home dingers. It would take us hours even to do the stuff that I've done so. Ridiculously in the last year. It's crazy. You can just blame it on the menopause. It's fine. Well, you do. I can't blame it on anything. Well, you can blame it that you sweat 23 hours out of every hour a day, every day. That's true. So, I mean, you could be irritable'cause of that, but Yep. I've done there. Been there. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean, there's always moments and. I don't think anyone's exempt from this, where you maybe react too quickly. You send a paragraph full of spite, instead of just taking a breath, maybe you slam a door with some sass on it, or you give someone that passive aggressive smile of doom because you might wanna choke them out. Yes, yes. I love sound relatable. Yes. Slamming the door with sass. Oh my goodness. That's a horrible, another thing, I used to get in so much trouble for slamming the door. You did? Mm-hmm. Yeah. Still would do it though. Still would do it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't, but I don't even know if I, when I was growing up, we were even allowed to have our door closed, much less. Slam it shut. I mean, we had bathrooms where you would get dressed and stuff, but we lived like in a brick ranch, so you cannot hide from somebody in a brick ranch. They know exactly when they hit that hallway. They've got four choices and that's it. And you're behind one of those doors. That sounds rough.'cause I lived in like a three story home and then you were growing up in one story. Like where do you run? One story. One story, yeah, that part. Mm-hmm. Well, mm-hmm. If all those moments sounded relatable, you're gonna wanna tune into what we have to say next.'cause we are gonna discuss how to move from reacting to responding, which is a staple of maturity, especially emotional maturity. And I think it's something we could all improve on. And guilty, I can definitely improve on that maybe just ask yourself, think on something. An emotion filled moment and ask yourself, are you reacting out of emotion or are you responding with intention? Are you reacting like a squirrel and espresso or are you acting like a mature, evolved human being? For me, I'm mostly a squirrel and espresso, but I'm also 20 something and I could use more therapy. So yeah, I, I react a lot. I don't respond, but I'm working on it. And we wanted to cover this episode because I think there's a lot of emotionally immature people in the world. Not that it's their fault. I think that there's a lot of emotionally immature people that become parents and then they don't know how to raise their kids with. Mm-hmm. Better responses. Mm-hmm. Then here we all are just a bunch of 8-year-old children in adult bodies just exploding all over the place. Just yeah, yeah, yeah. this one definitely, hits home and, and I, I think, you know, there are certain, life lessons that you learn and you only need to learn'em once, you know what I'm saying? Like. There are some, some things that you learn immediately and it's just a one time and done. I think this is over time and you have to refresh and refresh because it's gonna depend on what, phase you are in life, what you have going on. We react to things that have nothing to do with what's in front of us. And so we wanna try to give y'all some tidbits and, and maybe talk about things that work, things that definitely don't work. So let's hop in. Yeah, I think you're right that you have to keep coming back to it. Like it's not a, you know what it is? You're like, oh, I need to respond instead of react. My life has changed. I'll never do that again. Right. Because you'll have different situations, different triggers, different things that like maybe. You learn how to respond instead of react at work, and then you have a blow up with a friend and then you send them like a hate-filled paragraph and then you're like, crap. That was for my emotions. Yes. Yes. That have nothing to do with you, friend. You just happen to be the straw or this one thing just sent you every Yeah, I agree. Yeah. like Ronnie said, we're gonna dig into lots of things we're involving. Reacting versus responding. So how to maybe spot the red flags of yourself in the act. How to stop letting your emotions drive the car. You can let them use the GPS, but they don't have to drive the car. True, true, true. That. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. so first we're gonna get into the differences of what I like to call fight club versus book club. I love this. I love this. This is so good. So yes. Reacting is immediately responding to a trigger often based on our personal triggers, emotions, or our own ego. So yes example, maybe the heat of the moment word vomit, that feels so satisfying until five hours later you're lying awake in bed at 3:00 AM rehashing it all and thinking, why did I say that? Why did I do that? I feel terrible now. Relatable? Yeah. Yes, yes. You're like. Can I delete that like yesterday no ma'am. It's out there. It's in the universe and you're gonna have to take responsibility for what you just did. That hack job you just did on somebody that did not need it at all. Total hack job. Total hack job. I, I'll tell you a funny story about this and oh God, it's so funny because. First of all, I give plenty of content. I don't have to go out and search something ridiculous that I do or menopausal or. Whatever. But I had the situation where there was a group of us that were in, like a working text message thing, and we were all adults, all working on some, a common thing. But there had been this side thing that happened between, one of the other ladies in, in this text thread and myself, well. Well, it just kept escalating, escalating, escalating. And we were on a group chat and the next morning I get up and the girl had taken a screen screenshot of our correspondence, and it implicated her a hundred percent. I mean, just implicated her. Well, she had taken a screenshot to send her husband to say. Look at this. That just came in. Well, she sent it to the group, so it happens. Oh, I remember this. Yes. And it was like, oh my word. You know when drama, drama, drama, drama. And so it was funny because no one mentioned it. Everybody pretended like they didn't see it, but they did. Anyways, that was, that was funny. And that's just telling on somebody else. Only because you're gonna get tired of hearing my content.'cause it's, it's, it's never ending. It is like the bottomless mimosa in the hottest day kind of situation. So yeah. Yeah. We're actually thinking about adding a feature to our interjection called the classic Ronnie, where she shares what crazy. Or dumb stuff she did. Hundred percent. A hundred percent. Oh my gosh. But yes. Yeah. So reacting is, it's impulsive, it's emotion driven. It's usually unconscious and often starring our teenage self. Oh God, no. Not our teenage self. Yes. I do not like her. I do not wanna be her anymore. Exactly. Yes. This can look like instantly shutting down, retreating, avoiding giving into the urge to defend, attack, criticize, blame, counter blame. You picking up on a theme here? Yes. It's all not, not great stuff and it's reacting and it's spurring from our emotions. Heat of the moment stuff. Yeah. and it can feel good in the moment to get that out, but later you're gonna be feeling regretful or the situation is just gonna continue to escalate and that's not gonna be fun to deal with. Or you can lead to breakdowns in communication and relationships, which. Not great. No, no. We're seeing why reacting is not the best thing. Yes, for sure. it's very emotionally driven and. Sometimes ladies, if you're in a bad way and you happen to have a roommate or a spouse or somebody really close to you and you're like me, where I say, I can't even stand myself right now, go ahead and hand over that electronics because you cannot be trusted. I am just gonna tell you, there are times in your life where you either need to cut it off and get away and the, I mean there are so many good things about electronics, but this is one, um, that is very, can be very detrimental'cause you put stuff out there and you really can't. Erase that, and you certainly can't erase what somebody felt in response to that. Mm-hmm. Yeah, so definitely. Yeah. Yeah. So on the flip side, responding, the emotionally mature half of this, this can look like taking a moment where you just pause, you process, you reflect, and then you're gonna choose the most effective way forward. So your emotions might be feeling. Level 100. Mm-hmm. But emotions come, they rise, they fall. So if you just take a breath mm-hmm. You can push through that. You don't have to give into your emotions and respond out of that. You can just give yourself a second and think, okay, this is what's happening. These are what my emotions telling me, but how do I want to respond? You can choose the most effective way forward instead of throwing hands or throwing shade. Mm-hmm. And if you're feeling real crazy, you can use I statements. Yes. Yes, for sure. Because those are amazing for responding maturity. They are. They are. Mm-hmm. you'll understand that nine times outta 10 time is on your side. Time can be your best friend. Now, there are things that I'm sure you will hear us discuss where they need to be handled immediately, but this is not, I mean. Typically day in, day out, conversation, you know, friend, group, whatever work situation. Those, those can be handled, a little bit later than immediate. Mm-hmm. Immediately. Yeah, definitely. Some of the characteristics of responding is that it's thoughtful, it's intentional, and it's also rooted in awareness of yourself and awareness of the situation. And all of this comes from emotional regulation and maturity, which is easier said than done. It's hard. It's very, very hard. Mm-hmm. But instead of giving in, responding is recognizing the urge. So you may feel yourself wanting to lash out, to defend, to attack, to shut down. You recognize that, and you just recognize that these are very vulnerable feelings, maybe that you're having your vulnerable emotions or they're very strong emotions, but you're gonna utilize your growth and respond in a new way that can reinforce new behavior at the end of the day, that's gonna give you the outcome that you want in whatever situation it is. Mm-hmm. And then something else I found was interesting in terms of the psychology and the research behind reacting versus responding. reacting, engages your amygdala, which is your your brain's fear Flight fight. Your fear, fear flight and or fight center. Mm-hmm. Basically your personal fire alarm. Mm-hmm. And then responding is engaging your prefrontal cortex. So the rational decision making part of the brain. So the part that does taxes and meditate. Don't you want your more rational part of your brain to handle difficult situations instead of your personal fire alarm? I know I do. It's hard, but I do want it. Yes. Yes. That's very interesting. I know that the amygdala is like a little bitty, like beam size part of our brain. But boy, it packs a punch. Mm-hmm. And, again, also I'm just going off of just history and what I've learned in the past, cortisol levels go up mm-hmm. When you're using that part of your brain and we know how bad cortisol, high cortisol levels can be. it is not just to help us in our. Interpersonal relationships, work relationships, but it also helps us just to be able to be more grounded and not have all this circulating cortisol, which just drives more stress and on top of the whole thing. Yeah. So, yeah. Yeah. Well, you're right. I mean, high cortisol has a really bad impact on your health over time, so Yes, it does. This is not only the best, most mature decision you can make to practice responding instead of reacting, but. Long term for your health and like your nervous system and just I think how you feel generally, yes, it's gonna be worth it in the long run to work on something like this. Yes. And I think it also, you know, you are the best study of yourself, so you know, the triggers or the things that really set you off. Mm-hmm. Um, one thing as I've matured and Jim and I have matured in our marriage, is something that. I have tried to communicate to him, like for instance, I'm having some issues with brain fog. Okay, those of you will know what I'm talking about. Well, it's getting a little bit better, but in the past. I couldn't remember anything short term. And so all the time Jim was like, you remember I told you I've, we've already talked about this. I told you, and then I would hear it from my kids mom, I've already told you this, or I repeat a story. And I finally just went to Jim and I said, look, it doesn't matter if you have to tell me 20 times. When you say to me, I've told you this already, or remember it, un I become unglued. So I think it's good to have a partner in life or a best friend or someone that you can go to that person and say, here's why I'm responding. This is a trigger for me. I don't get a pass because it's a trigger. You don't get to act and pitch a fit because someone unknowingly pushes your button. You have to take a minute and step back, and I just think in any walk of life, any situation, there is no way that we can over communicate. Yeah. No way. Zero way. I will. I love that, that you said just because you're triggered, you don't get a pass to react. You don't, so let's look at the signs and the cost mm-hmm. Of reacting versus responding. Yeah. So here's some little things that you can store in your brain and. Signs you're in a reaction mode. So some of those could be you feel defensive or attacked immediately. Your face does that thing where it starts talking before your brain has decided to enter the conversation, you know? Jim would say to me, somebody's gonna pull over and knock your lights out the way you be looking at people when you're driving down the road. Somebody's gonna hurt you, but I've gotten better at that. But also your face, can say so much. And body language was huge. Body language is huge, or your heart rate spikes, you interrupt or talk over others. You are so ready to get your point across that. First of all, you've not listened at all, okay? If, if immediately you're having a conversation with someone and immediately when you stop talking, they already are mid through their, their response That is. Reacting. Yeah, definitely. So just active listening and then responding, active listening, and then respond. and then you later regret what you said or how you said it. That those are just some things that can let you know you are in the react mode. you feel out of control in the moment you respond to tone over content. Ding, ding, ding, ding. That's me. That's me, that you, I respond to tone versus content and I have to work on that, but I will tell you when I'm tired, when. It hasn't been good. You know, one thing happens, you can get in control of some of those emotional reactions, but also just be aware that there can be other things that come into your, your world or during that time period that you could be reacting to that have nothing to do with that one-on-one you're having with someone else. Definitely. I think that's a good point that, side note here, we wanna promote responding versus reacting, but I, I don't want anyone to think that it's possible to always respond maturely, right.'cause I mean, you're human stuff happens. You might react. We're trying to work on moving towards like the majority of the time, responding versus reacting. Yes. Yes. For sure. You gotta read the last one. Uh, this one Relatable. Yes. You may feel spicy, then guilty. Then you spiral and buy a bunch of snacks, and so you could be feeding your emotions. I love the way my Garrett talks about it so much because it's just kind of been a common theme with him and. You know, he's almost 30, so hopefully he won't be upset that I share this, but I'm going to anyways. Hopefully it doesn't trigger you, Garrett, but one thing that when he gets stressed and stuff, I'll call and ask how he's doing and doesn't happen as much now, but he would always tell me, I'm like, what you been up to? And he'll say, eating my emotions. So calling. All human beings. Anyone else listening to this that can say mm-hmm. I like to eat my emotions too. Really cool. Yeah. So that is definitely, a telltale sign. That you, you could be a reaction. Another sign of reaction mode that I thought was interesting I came across is kind of functioning in absolutes in your reaction. So you say a lot of like, you always do this or you never do that. and it's kinda like you're writing your own dramatic soap opera.'cause it feels good, you're like. This is my monologue and this is what you do. And there's no room for a gray area. Slam is definitely bad. Yes, yes, yes. That's really bad.'cause if you wanna put somebody on the defense, tell'em they always or never do something, that's fine. And then you have a lion on your hands. If you're telling me that for sure. so let's look at some cost of constant reactivity so Cana, tell us a little bit about that. What's the cost when we react? There's lots of costs and you might feel good in the moment to. Do that dramatic soap opera monologue or send that text. But over time, this can lead to damaged relationships overall. Ruined vibes. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Miscommunication that starts with tone and ends with tears, stress and burnout like we talked about, high cortisol levels 3:00 AM overthinking. That's never good. We need our sleep. We need our beauty sleep, ladies. Yes. And then also just repeating unhelpful patterns from the past, like it's the opening night of your childhood trauma play. Yes. Like I said, we do not want to be our teenage selves. We're gonna leave that person in the past because we are growing. Yep. And this is also, I think, acting from wounds rather than wisdom. Like I think reacting to triggers a lot is you're reacting from a place of hurt in a place of wounds that maybe haven't healed rather than that, again, emotionally mature, wiser part of yourself that we're working towards. I love that. That, that right there, acting from wounds rather than wisdom, that is, that's priceless. And I think just reacting in general will get in the way of your healing process. I mean, whatever you're healing from, whatever's happened in your past. Mm-hmm. Whatever you're growing through. Mm-hmm. You're constantly reacting to triggers. I think that's giving the triggers power over you. Absolutely. So maybe that's a sign that you need to keep working on your growth or your healing journey. Yep. Yep. Mm-hmm. It's definitely the litmus test. Definitely these reacting responses. You can look back and, and ask yourself the questions, why did I react that way? Well, let's go back and see what happened before. And then, you know, learn from when you blow it mm-hmm. Is the best thing you can do. Absolutely. All right. now that we know how bad reacting is for ourselves, we're gonna talk about how we can actually shift to responding and some little tips and tricks that might help you utilize this and practice it in your own life. First one, like we said earlier, is just pause. Take a pause, take a breath. Even two to three seconds might stop you from sending that rage text. Mm-hmm. And being able to say, okay, this is not how I wanna respond. Yep. I wanna respond in a way that makes me proud of myself and is focusing on my emotionally mature side because it's in there somewhere. Exactly. And then long and slow breasts with this technique are especially effective. And then. I, I saw this phrase and I was like, yes. Pause. Like your therapist is watching you. I love that. I love that. Yeah. That's so good. Definitely. you also wanna name the emotion you're feeling, that you're feeling initial reaction coming from. So is it coming from, am I frustrated am I irritated? you wanna self-reflect and when you do, there are gonna be times that you might need to respond in haste. but checking yourself and doing some of these like little spot testing throughout, just. In general, your life. Like looking back, look back people, when we screw up, we don't ever wanna look back. The first thing we wanna do is forget that. But if you look back when we've messed up, You can learn a lot and then not use that again. Definitely. So that's where we want you to come and we want to be there too. Shifting res to responding is check your nervous system. Are you in flight or fight mode? That means that you are reacting and not responding from your amygdala. From your amygdala. That little bitty teen. Yeah. Yes. Another one is to ask questions instead of making those statements of absolution or assumptions like Judge Judy. Okay. Curiosity, before you go to prosecute someone from a place of emotion. Oh my gosh. So maybe someone says something that triggers you or makes you wanna react in a certain way, and then you, you may even want to ask questions, figure out why they're feeling that way. Like what happened that made them feel that way before you just respond out of anger or go immediately on defensive mode? Yeah. Yeah. that one, let me tell you, everybody's biggest fan is themselves in their lives. So if you wanna help somebody get off guard, including yourself, ask questions, people love to talk about themselves and that's not a bad thing. Otherwise, we wouldn't really know or be able to gauge. how are reacting versus responding is yeah, impacting them. Mm-hmm. Definitely. Another one is thinking about using grounding techniques. maybe in that two to three seconds where you're taking a breath, focus on feeling your feet on the ground. Breathe in for four out for six. This is gonna help. Switch off your stress response and calm your nervous system, maybe that will enable you to use that prefrontal cortex. The right, the part of your brain that does the taxes. Yes, yes. you want to recognize this and be into shifting is, let me think about that and get back to you. Mm-hmm. Again, time is on your side. I would say a hundred percent I have a hundred percent of time. If you're not in danger of losing your life immediately or someone else, take your time to respond. Yeah. I've never had someone do like, someone say like, let me think about that and get back to like in a heated moment. I've never done that. I've never had someone do that to me. But man, that would be so useful. Yeah, I bet people would like think it's weird. Like what? But do it. If it's gonna make you respond in a way that you're proud of, who cares what that other person thinks? Tell'em I need a moment before I respond. Like, yes. Let me just think about this before I say anything. Yes. Then you won't say anything you regret and you do want to communicate the silence. Otherwise people will just get the thing of that you've ghosted them and sometimes you need a while to think on it. and then you also have to gauge like, how much access have I, am I giving this person? You know? So yeah, taking that time to just kind of. Reflect back in saying that Yeah. Communicate that so that they don't feel like you're, not interested or, you know, put out by what's going on. Mm-hmm. Yeah. In that conversation. Another thing that, and I feel like this will really help me, so I'm gonna try and keep this little mantra at the forefront as I work on my responding, is, especially when you're dealing with a loved one and someone that you really value that relationship with, think about what response serves the relationship and not my ego or not my emotions. Mm-hmm. Because ultimately you want the best outcome from the relationship. And it may not be continuing the relationship, but you want, I mean, even if you're gonna end that relationship, you still wanna respond in a way that you're proud of, in a way that's not hurtful or just based on how your emotions are raging. Right? Right. If you need to end a relationship, you wanna make sure you go out not feeling guilty about something. so yeah. Definitely. Absolutely. Definitely. So next, we're just gonna quickly, real briefly, before we close, just talk about maybe why, I mean, I feel like it's maybe obvious at this point. We've talked about the cost of reactivity, but why should we be focused on responding? Some of the benefits. Well one emotional maturity is hot, period. It's, yes. Okay. Emotionally mature people are hot. Have you ever been so frustrated with how emotionally immature men are in the dating world? Well, same goes to us girls. We gotta be emotionally mature too. It might be easier for us because of gender roles, societal expectations, the way we're raised. Mm-hmm. Might be easier for us than it is for men. Mm-hmm. But. Come on girls. We still gotta work on it and we're going to'cause it's hot. Yes. Yes, absolutely. Yes. More meaningful and respectful communication. At the end of the day, we're always gonna want that because that's gonna lead to strengthened relationships and trust. Yes. Another reason why we wanna be responding instead of reacting is you get to keep your mental peace. Mm-hmm. And you get to be proud of yourself. Mm-hmm. I think that's like one of the biggest benefits is over time, if you're responding and not reacting, you're gonna feel so proud of yourself for that growth and that maturity. Yeah. also increased self-respect and emotional mastery. You show people how to respect you. My modeling, how you handle hard moments and mm-hmm. Our teach people how to treat us is, is all of the things that we talk about, generally go back and make it all. Um, they're all pieces of a puzzle. I guess that's what I'm trying to say. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. you get to decide. Mm-hmm. you get to decide how you react or you respond to something, and when you respond, then you're able to act in a way that's not reckless. Yeah. That serves a dual purpose, not just mm-hmm. Getting the point across, but also celebrating a win that you were able to communicate in a way. I mean, some of you on that are listening. You're just gonna have to start out by figuring out how to even communicate. Your lack of approval, by the way, somebody did something. Mm-hmm. So, yeah. Yeah, definitely. Yeah. I mean, another benefit is you can feel in control of yourself instead of controlled by your emotions.'cause that's never a good feeling when you just feel like you're a victim to your own emotions. Yes. And you succumb to how strong they are. Yes. And then you could just feel filled with regret later and like, I wish I would've responded this way, but my emotions just took control of me in that moment. Mm-hmm. That sucks. Yeah, for sure. And that's another way we can feel proud of ourself is feeling like we have control over our emotions and our responses. our last one I think is a great benefit too, is you're gonna model this emotional intelligent for others because human beings are inherently social and we learn through modeling and. We model people that we look up to. So especially if you're a parent, like you can be teaching your kids how to have emotional intelligence, which is I think one of the biggest charges of responsibility for a parent is teaching a kid how to be in touch with their emotions and how to work through them and regulate them. It's, it's tough work, but if you're a parent who's, who's done that, it's gonna be. Infinitely beneficial to your child. And then, I mean, also too, like in different relationships, if you don't have kids, you can model this to your partner, your coworkers, like, I mean, we're, we're all in this together and we gotta learn from each other and it's gotta start from somebody. So Might as well be you. Yeah. Yeah. Be the hero in that situation because you can, yeah. Mm-hmm. Absolutely. So in closing, we always bring you guys, a quote. And so this what she sh she. Ooh. She shed. She shed, no, I'm not thinking about getting the she shed, because then I'd be required to do something to earn the she shed, and I'm not very crafty, so let's just leave the she shed. Golly. All right. What did he or she say between stimulus and response? There's a space, and that space is our power choose our response. And this is Victor Frankel. Mm-hmm. He's an Australian neurologist and psychologist who is og King of self re-regulation. Yes. Tell us, tell us about him. Tell us about Baker. FI actually remember learning about him in college. He founded Logotherapy, a school of psychotherapy that describes a search for life's meaning as the central human motivational force. But I really like that, like the idea of like the space in between how. What, whatever the situation is or the trigger, there's that space and we have the power to choose our response. So take your power back and work on responding instead of reacting. Yes. I love that. That's so good. Mm-hmm. So we have a challenge this week as always, and we want you to think about an area in your life where you can re improve on responding instead of reacting. I know I have that immediately brings forth a couple of situations or areas, uh, within relationships that I need to work on, for sure. Mm-hmm. Same. So journal or keep a voice notes on your phone. Or a great way to process your reactions and shift into awareness over time. So sometimes it's just reacting in a safe environment before you actually respond. To this person that Yeah. And you know, we all need those people in our lives that we can totally just come, come before them. Beared, naked. Don't have to explain anything. You're that person for me, for sure. Kana, If I did better about calling you when I wanna respond to something or react to something and and just get it off my chest, then that second time you respond usually is a little more calm. So, yeah, same. Yeah, that's a great idea too. Like if it's not a thing where it's like a face to face, maybe you do have that person you call and you're like, oh, this is what I'm feeling right now. This is how I wanna respond. Like, help me work through this and figure out how I should respond in a way that I'm proud of. Mm-hmm. So definitely. Yeah, definitely journaling too. I think I've actually been better at journaling. I've journaled like three times this week. Oh, is she? Okay. Who is this girl? My baby girl. But I'm definitely going to keep that in mind. we're gonna work on our responding instead of reacting. And we want to hear about your growth too. So send us a dm, follow us on social media. Leave a comment. Leave a comment on YouTube, on Spotify, on Apple. We love to hear from you guys. It's so inspiring to hear stories and. See the growth that we're making as a community together as women. Hit us up, follow us, leave us a review. We would love it. Awesome. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's the way we end every session and that's, that's the tea. And we love you guys. We will talk to you next week. Thanks. Alright. Bye guys. See you next week. Bye. Bye.