Thanks! It’s the Trauma!
Thanks, It’s the Trauma is a raw and honest podcast hosted by Katrina and Krystal, diving into real-life experiences, trauma, and the journey toward healing. Using humor to unpack even the heaviest moments, they bring light to tough conversations around mental health, resilience, and turning pain into purpose. Through personal stories and powerful guest interviews, this podcast reminds you that you’re not alone—and your story matters.
Thanks! It’s the Trauma!
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No plan. No script. No real idea where this conversation was going—we just hit record and started talking. 😂
From the economy and the cost of living to homelessness, polygamy, and all the random rabbit holes we somehow manage to fall into, this episode is truly a little bit of everything.
It’s one of those conversations where you never quite know what’s coming next—and honestly, neither did we. We’re talking about things that are happening in the world, things that make us scratch our heads, things that piss us off, and probably a few things that make you say, “Wait… how the hell did we get here?”
So buckle up, because this one is off the cuff, unfiltered, and all over the damn place.
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Hey, best friend. Hey, best friend. It's Wednesday, so you know it's time for another fresh ass episode of Thank the Trauma. And I'm Trina. I'm Crystal. And I know last week we talked a little bit about my travels, uh, going back and forth to Albuquerque. Let me tell you, I had therapy today. She was asking me how I handled my anxiety, you know, while I was gone and everything. And I told her I really had to tell myself, like, okay, you're okay. And I had to use the frame of mind of, is this a crisis or is this just an inconvenience? Right. But what I didn't mention, also part of those travels is um on the way back home, I got a email from Delta that was saying that my bags arrived earlier than my flight. And I'm like, there was an earlier flight. Why did I have to sit five and a half hours? When did my bags get home before I did? Right. So it was telling me that I was gonna have to go find the Delta service desk area, and luckily it was right by baggage claim. So I walked in there. That woman was rude as shit. Because I told her they they get paid to be rude, I think. I I will not fly Delta again.
SPEAKER_00Um, but as soon as I kind of bougie, they are a little bougie, they're the bougie.
SPEAKER_01And I just I was not impressed with them. I will not fly Delta again. I'm sorry. I really like American. Yeah, they're good, but Southwest has my heart.
SPEAKER_00Okay, Southwest they flew Southwest, she looks she liked it a lot. I've yeah, I've done Delta, I've done American, uh that's it.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and but try Southwest and you'll love it, I promise. Um, but I go in there and I talk to the lady and I tell her about this email, and before I can even get it out of my mouth, she hollers, carousel to, and points over there at it. And I was like, Oh, I didn't realize I didn't realize I was getting arrested and fucking put in prison, bitch. Right. I apologize, just fuck me, right? Okay, sorry. So between that, well, I got all my bags, I got home and I needed something out of my bag, so I open it up and I find that there's a TSA ticket in there, so my shit's done been searched, all my stuff's tossed around. I thought, oh great. I hope they felt like shit seeing all that search.
SPEAKER_00That's probably why it got searched, is because it got they'll pick randoms to search and it probably got pulled and went through and went on ahead. Yeah, that was probably after they violated her, they sent her home like a good girl.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, well, they sent my banner too, but I didn't know that at first, and it was like shoved up under somebody else's suitcase. So I'm like searching all these carousels trying to find this banner. I finally found it. But look, I had therapy, and she was asking me about that today. And when I told her all of the different things that had happened on my trip, even she was dying laughing because she couldn't believe it, and she was like, But you did it. So I felt really accomplished because my therapist gave me a pat on the back and was like, You did it, girl.
SPEAKER_00But traveling, I mean, especially like I've until a couple through what three years ago, I've never really I mean on a boat, I've traveled, but never on a plane. And I don't know, like Josh is getting better with it. I love it. I hate I hate the experience of getting on one off of another, going on the shuttle. That is terrifying. Like, I just I don't know. It did that would be the hardest thing for me, I think. Because I'm not even like I can go up to one of those mall things, just like you are here, and I'm like, if I had a sim, it would be over there. Like I can't, I'm just I'm directionally challenged like pitifully. So same, same. Josh is my navigator, and uh yeah. Now I can't sit back and find his like if he's wrong, I can find a mistake, but I can't make myself be like, okay, I need to like I just freak the fuck out. I panic. I don't know. If I had to do it by myself, I'm sure I could do it, but like I would not have an easy time doing it alone.
SPEAKER_01Mine is just the people, like it's so crowded in all of these airports, and like when I was traveling and stuff, it was just so people-y, and you know, people just be out there doing people and stuff.
SPEAKER_00It is, and when you're on the plane, you know, I was lucky enough to like I could get the window seat because Josh didn't want it, you know what I mean? So I got to sit on the inside, but you're just looking at people, and I mean, like, I don't know. I will say for the most part on a plane, people are quiet and they try to be cordial and stuff. But the things that they do, and that it's just weird. It's kind of like it's the same premise of uh I would think like being a dude and going up to a urinal and just standing there with next to another dude peeing. I don't know how we do that. It's like we're not gonna discuss what's going on or what we're doing together on this plane, but we're just gonna do it. And it's just you know, it's just like awkward.
SPEAKER_01I don't we're gonna sit inches apart, and we're not gonna be able to do that.
SPEAKER_00Right, and especially if you have to sit next to somebody that you don't know. Yeah, and I think I did well, I did coming back from uh I was going from Portland to Chicago this last time, and it was me and this really big guy. Yeah. Really big older guy. And uh he had a window seat, and then my assigned seat was the middle seat, and I'm thinking, I don't know if somebody's coming or not. And so I sat in my seat to try to wait and see if anybody was coming, and this motherfucker looked at me and was like, um, you know, we can spread out a little bit, but I'm like, you the one that's taking up the whole damn row, and you're gonna tell me to move. Right, with your bulbus ass. Y ol bastard, you better be glad I was sitting next to you. I guarantee you a woman ain't sat that close to you in a long time.
SPEAKER_01See, that's what I'm saying. People just people, and I was telling you before we started recording and everything, too. Just like going to the grocery store. Can't even go to the grocery store, had two meth heads just having it out in the parking lot. I mean, she was screaming at dude, was up in his face, took her shirt off. I mean, look, she had a tube top on underneath, but she got so pissed she just took her shirt off and was just walking off and everything. I thought, what is going on here? It had to have been some kind of substances involved. Oh, guarantee it. Guarantee it. But do you ever just go into a store or something like that? And then it's like people just out to get you. They I I see it every day, like it's my life, part of my life.
SPEAKER_00Right. Well, I'm sure you do, yeah. People are insane and majority rude. Oh, yeah, definitely. Um, you know, it it's it's it used to be I've worked in public, like worked with the public 20 years uh in one fashion or another, and it used to be about 75 people, 75% people were like cool, easy going, decent type, and then 25 are just problematic and assholes, and now it's I think it's shifted. I think so. I'm gonna say it's it's 40% decent and 60% assholes.
SPEAKER_01I said I wouldn't even no, I mean I would have said 80-20.
SPEAKER_00I'm saying that as far as Lawrence goes, you know, I'm sure other places, yeah. And Lawrence, I mean, it's pretty much the same as it always has been, but it has it's changed, not for the better, but most places. But we haven't got we haven't grown as much as Greenville, Simpsonville area and stuff or bigger places. We're still rural and I don't know. I see my well, I work next to a hospital and a jail. Yeah. So I see all types of people. I've seen a man running around in a sheet that he stole from the hospital. Um, I've seen a woman stand there and her whole pants fell down and she just stood in the parking spot with her whole front out for the whole public to see. Oh, why not? We we had to back view. I'm guessing she lost a significant amount of weight in jail. Maybe so. And could not keep her clothes on. Hey. I've had I've had to tell a lady that she had to leave um the premise before and she continued to. I mean, I ain't never seen nobody do nothing like this. She started banging her head into the propane cage. What? Um, she was standing with her shoulder to it, right? So she was like whipping her head like it looked like somebody was had her by the shoulders and was doing it. Like that's how fast it and it was crazy. I mean, it looked like she was possessed or something. And it was terrifying. I mean, it was really scary. But I'm glad I don't know frightening. I don't think so. I don't think so. Because she was hitting it on the flush part.
SPEAKER_01I yeah, I don't know what I would have done in that situation right there, seeing a woman just smashing herself up against the body.
SPEAKER_00That terrified me because if she was sitting there and do that herself, I don't know what she'd do to me. I took my ass on the door, I sat my fat ass down. That's what I did. You remember Francis? And I sat my fat ass down. Yeah. I am not getting involved with all them lawyers. You know what I mean? I am not doing it.
SPEAKER_01No, I wouldn't have done that either.
SPEAKER_00But you know what scared me for real. She's the only one that's ever scared me, scared me. And I've had to tell people they can't sleep on the sidewalk. I mean, it's it's sad.
SPEAKER_01It is, and you know what we have a lot of that here in Greenville, too, you know, where they're starting to take out the park benches and put in the ones that are slanted to keep people from being able to sleep on them. And there's a fine too. If you help homeless people, you can be fined for doing that.
SPEAKER_00Which I think is counterproductive. I know everybody everybody out there isn't homeless because they're a drug addict. Some of them are, some of them aren't. Everybody's got different stories. I just feel like if we have that big of a problem, maybe I don't know, the city, the fucking state, maybe do something to try to help.
SPEAKER_01They are. They're fine and people for helping. That's what their big thing is. But as far as offering resources and things, all they're doing is they've come and they've rounded them up and they've taken them to different areas and basically dropped them off there.
SPEAKER_00It's like you can't stay in this area, someone drop you off. It's like getting the straight cat and just taking it and opening it off.
SPEAKER_01That's exactly what it's like. We we were so used to seeing, you know, the same homeless individuals around, you know, and it was getting to a point whereas where it was kind of excessive just to see the homeless, the amount of homeless people that were in the city, you know, walking up and down the streets, hanging out at the gas stations, hanging out at the Salvation Army. Um, had there's one big church that does a soup kitchen right up the road from my house, and there's always a big line. But they also do AA and NA too. So usually there's a line out there all day long because of the different groups that they have there too. But yeah, they were basically, you know, cops come in, get them, relocate them.
SPEAKER_00I mean, you think about it though, they're homeless, right?
SPEAKER_02Mm-hmm.
SPEAKER_00Okay, where where are they supposed to go? I mean, like, if they can't sleep in the park, you know, obviously I can understand businesses because most people out there they want to start panhandling and stuff, and like I don't I don't think it's right to allow them to do that to the customers of the business. Right you know, I me personally, if I pull up at this restaurant or this store or wherever, and there's people always out there and they're always bugging and asking and trying to talk, like I'm not gonna go there again. Yeah, remember Moondoggy? Yeah, I definitely do. I guess I guess you go find a teenage girl to lay up with.
SPEAKER_01I don't know. I mean Yeah, so we knew this guy named Dale back in the day, and when we were teenagers, we were living on our own and everything, and our friend Amanda at the time like 32 was like 32, and we were 18. Yeah, something like that. Yeah, he was like 32 years, yeah. He was living in the woods out back of a Ryan Steakhouse, which, if you don't know what that is, it's like a sizzler or a ponderosaurus corral, a golden corral, something like that. But Ryan Steakhouse used to be a really big thing here, and um he was living out back of that, and somehow he got connected up with a manor. There was there was a crick down there now, and there was a crick, and so somehow he ended up in our house. Now, Amanda Crystal and I all lived together at that point, but there was no conversation about this dude coming in, and he was skitzed out on something, and so Crystal affectionately named him Moondoggy because he was a trip, he was a trippy dude, he was a very trippy dude.
SPEAKER_00He wore you know the same Bart Simpson shirt every freaking day, but you know, like I'm sitting there thinking about it in hindsight. You know who he looked like, like a bigger, taller bobcat Goldway. Yes, I have said that for years because you know his hair was he dyed his hair black. He did he did because he would have roots sometimes. Amanda got roots.
SPEAKER_01Well, he decided he was gonna get into an altercation with Amanda one night, and he pulled out a steak knife and started like sawing at his wrists and everything, and then he ran out the door of our place and out into the woods. We had called the cops and everything. I'm running trying to get help, having an asthma attack because I can't get anybody to open the door. Our phones aren't working. I don't know if he cut the line or what, but we think he eventually went across.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, we used the payphone up across the street.
SPEAKER_01We went across the street finally to the gas station, ran over there. We were able to call cops to come over there. They searched the woods, they found him, and he decided he was gonna shit his pants.
SPEAKER_00I think he had already shit his pants.
SPEAKER_01He might have already shit his pants. Meanwhile, I'm trying to catch my breath. They got me heaved over a tub trying to get hot water to open my lungs up because I'm wheezing, feel like I'm about to pass out because I ran more than I ever ran in my life. But see, that's what I'm talking about there. There's a threat. Oh my god, trying to get everything to bone thugs and harmony. Doing his hands like he was part of the crypts, something.
SPEAKER_00Like it looked like he was trying to rave to it, but he would do this like movements with his hands that look like something he knew to do or something. I don't know. It was weird. I'm like, what the fuck is this?
SPEAKER_01Choreographed his own stuff to bone thus in harmony, and he had to show us. Again, I do believe substances were involved.
SPEAKER_00He remember he filling that critter he had done hurt himself too, because you remember he filling that critter hole and was wearing that. He was wearing he was wearing Das Boot.
SPEAKER_01He was wearing Das Boot and that same Bart Simpson t-shirt. I do remember that. Now, what Amanda has seen in him, I will never know. But from there, we ended up taking him back to the Ryan Steakhouse and letting him gather his belongings, and that's where he stayed.
SPEAKER_00He was no longer allowed in our house after all of the things that we have like we I know we said something about it at the time, but like did we not have an intervention with her?
SPEAKER_01We kind of did because she had just brought him into the house.
SPEAKER_00We didn't know who he was, where like he came from the damn cat being there, right?
SPEAKER_01And so I mean, we kind of let it go for a little bit, even though he was weird because Amanda was kind of like, We'll keep it under control, you know. I'll keep him under control. What is there to keep under control? Why do you even have to keep this man under control? Madman.
SPEAKER_00He's a tiger, right? And he was I'm not even convinced to this day he was a real person. I don't think he was. I think he was winning people in headsuits or something. I don't think he was I don't think he was a real person. I think he had seemed to me like he had done so much like acid or something of that nature.
SPEAKER_01Substances had to have been involved because he I don't but I don't even think he was doing it then.
SPEAKER_00I think he had just done it so much. Probably he had brain damage from it or something. I because we make a fun, but this is like this is shit he did.
SPEAKER_01This is true life.
SPEAKER_00You remember the time he was asleep on the couch and he just rolled off of it. He just did this, and I'm not talking about a normal roll over, like I swear to God, like he was we were watching TV and he's over here asleep on this couch over on the other side. And I swear to God, it looked like he just he was like back out face toward the inside of the couch, and it was like like he just very fast flipped and like almost like levitated or something, yes, and then pushed forward off the couch in one like fluid moon. Yes, just one fell swoop. I'm like, what the I mean, this moment in his sleep, bro. He's doing he's doing the whole like I'm sure that's some kind of ice, that's like a triple double. What is it? Like an ice skating thing? I don't know what it was, but all I know is triple axle, that's what it was. He did the triple axle and then he fell off the couch, but he did it while he was laying down.
SPEAKER_01Oh no, he didn't just fall off that couch, he launched off that couch. He dead asleep and just smacked that floor as hard as anybody could coming off of a couch.
SPEAKER_00And he would snore, and I swear now it makes me think like I I picture it now, like the damn dog from Little Nikki, where it's like yes. I wonder what ever happened to him.
SPEAKER_01I probably did probably, probably. I mean, I hope that he got his life together.
SPEAKER_00They just took him back up the Rhines and let him out that night. They took him with the doo-doo in his pants. That's what I said, and he could go get it. Well, there's a crack there, he could have washed it off.
SPEAKER_01And I'm sure he did. Better get to scrubbing on a rock or something. I don't know what you're gonna do. But at that point in time, it was no longer my problem, it was no longer your problem. Hell, at that point, if Amanda wouldn't have got rid of him, it she could have joined him. And it took something really crazy, like was it? Oh, he lied to her. Something. Yeah, he lied to her about something. He told her that he had a child die.
SPEAKER_00Yes, that's what it was. His son, who was supposedly like eight or ten or something like that, died in a car wreck in Texas or whatever. That's what he had told her, and she didn't. I don't know what made her question or what made her think that it wasn't true. Maybe she caught him in a couple other lies or something, but she went and to the library and looked it up on the interwebs because you know back then we had stuff like we got now, but she figured it out and called the the police department in that town asked about fatalities, yeah.
SPEAKER_01That's right, and he had fabricated that whole story, and that caused the big blow-up between them and him to grab the dullest steak knife in the house. I think it was from Ryan's. It was, it was, yeah. So it was so there's that true life story right there. That it was always something. See, this is what I'm talking about. People be people in. They do. You know, my frow Holly, she had sent me a thing too. She said, I can't go out and people unless I'm with the people that help me go out and people with those people, and that couldn't have been any truer. It is true. It is I I gotta have a support system like either you or like Dave to go out and people somewhere because I really can't do it on my own. It is so hard for me.
SPEAKER_00I did it for so long, and just you know what I'm saying, doing hair and stuff, like I had to be so put on to do that for so long. I could do it, I can do it. I don't want to do it.
SPEAKER_01No, I I don't either.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, I like I refuse to do it because it just like I said, I'm filling the cups that fill my cups. If you don't if you suck my energy and you drain me and you I I just won't be around you, and that's just kind of what it is.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, that's where I'm at. Because I've had to tell myself, you know, Trini, you can't pour from an empty cup, you just can't. And yeah, those people that just suck it out of me and just take the life out of me and everything like that, I just can't do it anymore.
SPEAKER_00No, I can't either. I can't either, because while you sitting there with your cup and nothing coming out, they all over there drinking.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and my patience is run a lot thinner too.
SPEAKER_00And mine is too. I don't have a whole lot of tolerance. It's it's not even really anger or or being a bitch or whatever people want to call it. It's more like I've just put my foot down in life and I'm just like, I don't have to, I'm not going to. You can't fucking make me. Right.
SPEAKER_01Exactly. And that's where I'm at with you on that too, best friend. I am. And I apologize if I'm smacking because I'm trying to keep my gum from smacking, but I'm just trying to quit smoking. I've done good so far. You work in silence. Oh yeah, I'm working in silence. Except for this, working in silence. Except for this gum. But it was funny because Jeff told me, he said, I figured you might have stopped smoking because I didn't hear throughout the episode from our lighters. I'm good at hiding it. And you know, back to the people in though, best friend, you know, I got a job and I'm gonna be going back into corporate America again. And that's all I'm gonna be doing is working with people and helping them find jobs and putting them and placing them in positions and things like that. And that's what I actually love to do. But I gotta deal with people. So go figure that one out. But you're dealing with them on a on a hand that they want a job. Yeah, and they're gonna be their best version of themselves in order to get that.
SPEAKER_00Yeah. I get motherfuckers that's going through divorces and their children is on their last nerve and ain't got no you know what I'm saying? And they try to put twelve dollars and gas on four debit cards and yeah, it's hard out here and I get it. I get it. I do I do, but I don't know. I think I can't tell if it aggravates me that I feel this way or if it's I don't know. I I can't help but I'll get pissed off or I upset, like perturbed, whatever. And then I'll think about it and I'll be like, I don't know their story. You know what I mean? Like I don't know what they go through. I don't know what I mean. I I can't help but think that way. And I'm not gonna say I always have. I definitely learned that over the past few years, but I can't help but be empathetic in a way.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and I am to an extent, except for when I see the same people pandering for money and they got on a brand new pair of Nike Air Macs. I see these people that to be pandering up around where we at, they ain't dressed like that.
SPEAKER_00These are some yeah real deal. No, yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01And there's some of those too, and those are the ones that I want to know their story. And like I've bought them food before, you know what I mean? Like I've brought and there was one time I bought uh food for a guy, and he went outside and immediately started sharing with two other people that were standing out there that were hungry too. So I went back in and got more food. Right, but they weren't dressed in brand new Air Maxes and you know, nice shirts and it's I don't know.
SPEAKER_00I just can't stand like I I've bought many, many, many, many people, you know, that are walking. Yeah, ice walk. Right. Um, I'm paying for that out of my pocket. I we don't get free anything. We still have to pay for like cups and things if we get a drink or whatever, you know what I'm saying? So like I pay, I can't tell you, but this one dude, it was about three weeks ago. I told you know, I'll get you some water, you know, and he was like, I can't have no frazzle, no slushy. I said, Fuck no, I'm like, this shit right here, this shit right here. This is why it just See, that's the kind of shit that fries my ass. Right. I would be if I'm in need to that degree that I need someone to get me some water, I'm gonna be so damn grateful for that water. Right. And if it's cold, even better. Right, ice water, yeah, appreciate that, and also do that for a reason because ice is free and water is free in a re in a cup that you have, so they could go outside, drink it, come back in and refill it all day for free. Right. If they were there all day, and then I was like, no, sir, and then he goes back out and he starts like going up to customers and stuff, and I'm like, Yeah, you can't do that, man. Right. And so I went out there and I was like, You're gonna have to move on. And he's like, Man, I'm trying to get a ride. You can't tell me I can't not get a ride. And I said, You you definitely can get a ride. You can call you an Uber. Um, there's a taxi that runs here. That's one little old man, but he'll come get you. Um, but no, you're not gonna be asking customers for rides. You're you can't be doing that. And this motherfucker goes, Man, fuck you. I said, Okay. And he was like, Man, why why you just sitting there trying, maybe you can want him help me? And but fuck you for not helping me. I said, Fuck you. Do you think you're the only person that has come through here today with a sad story? Get going. And he's like, Well, I'm da-da-da-da. And he kept on, kept on. And I said, Well, while you talking, get walking. Because if you don't get your ass up to the road, I'm calling the cops, and they right over there, and they're just gonna come take you right back. Yeah, exactly. Fuck me for not helping him, even though I done bought him. We don't bought hims a drink, right?
SPEAKER_01And everything like that, didn't have to do shit, didn't have to give him anything.
SPEAKER_00See, man, fuck you. Right. I mean, literally, it's just it's insane. But I mean, that's what I mean. And it's the younger kids, you know, like the 25-year-olds, and man, that it that's a whole nother discussion I don't want to get into today because that's pitiful.
SPEAKER_01It is pitiful, but you know, it's like it's everywhere, and it happens everywhere. But that's like those people that get attitudes when you don't give them something around here are usually the ones that have the name brand, clothes, and shoes on and stuff, but they're out there at the same spots at the traffic lights every day with their hands out.
SPEAKER_00I don't deal with that types.
SPEAKER_01My mom, she actually is part of an outreach program that she's getting started at the church, and she met a homeless guy at the Murphy gas station in front of Walmart. And his name is Nigel, and he had had a stroke, and he was not homeless, but he can't find a job because of his stroke, he doesn't have a car, he can't drive, things like that, and his rent is only forty-four dollars. But it takes so much to get disability or you know right, he doesn't get any of that, so he is out there pandering for $44 a month so that he can keep a roof over his head. Now, stories like that that I can understand.
SPEAKER_00But he's lucky in a lot of ways, you know what I'm saying?
SPEAKER_01He is, but he's trying to just make his ends meet too, you know. That's not including any food or utilities or anything like that, and you know, he's on his own. So I understand kind of like stories like that, but these other people that are just out there with their hands out every day, like I can't do it.
SPEAKER_00I got compassion for everybody until they give me some shit. You know what I mean? I really do, I really do feel that for everybody that I come into contact with.
SPEAKER_02Right.
SPEAKER_00But but the second you start coming off in a way to me, I just I don't know. I don't get it. I don't understand why people feel the need to I don't know. It makes me wonder is like, are they like this at home but worse? Or they get this shit out in public so they don't be that way at home. You know what I mean? Like so they're I don't know. I just I would I've I've probably been there in a place similar before in my life at some point, but I just can't imagine being that angry all the time.
SPEAKER_01Right. I've given uh ladies that were homeless, I've given them rides to where they needed to go. I have bought food, I don't give them cash, I will buy them food and drinks that they can take with them, so I know that that's where that money is going because my money is not gonna be uh you know, fun money.
SPEAKER_00No, so and that's the thing the economy is so bad, and some people act like it does not affect them at all. Right, you know, some people are just oblivious to it, and then other people are really hit by it, and everybody's a little more cautious now. People don't have money to donate like that right now.
SPEAKER_01No, they don't, it's hard everywhere.
SPEAKER_00Like you said, they're just trying to make their ends, so it's I'm trying to make mine too. Yeah, me too. You know, I mean, like it it's hard. It it's hard to be alive in this time, you know what I mean? Like it's it's a hard time to to be alive, and to have anything, really.
SPEAKER_01I mean, I look at what the economy's like right now, and I can understand why it's so difficult for our children to be able to get out on their own and to have anything for themselves.
SPEAKER_00It is, you know, and too, like I mean, me and you are kind of examples. We I mean we were married at 20 21 years old. So I mean, like we I don't know, we've been coupled up for so long, but that's not it happens, but it's not common anymore.
SPEAKER_01Right. That doesn't mean that doesn't mean that doesn't come with its own share of you know, show go along with it too.
SPEAKER_00And it definitely does, but you got a partner, you know. A lot of these kids are just partnerless, you know, and it's sad.
SPEAKER_01Well, I know my kids have a support system and they know that, right? But then I look at like how Austin is, and he's just like going down the wrong path of the things that he wants to focus on, like with music and streaming and stuff like that. And it's like that don't pay the bills, my guy. So I had to get into his ass the other day.
SPEAKER_00That's a passion project.
SPEAKER_01That's not I got into his ass real hard the other day about it, and I felt bad as a mom. You know how he had that mom guilt for jumping their ass like that. But it needed to be said, and I told him I need him to man up and be a contributing member of society, right? You know, so he he's taking those steps to try to get back on track, but you know, he's staying with my mom now, and he only has till the end of the year, and after that, if he's not out on his own, I don't know what he's gonna do because we don't have the room at our house to bring him back again. I've got already got my two daughters, two grandkids, a boyfriend here, my husband. Well, not my boyfriend, my daughter's boyfriend. So I got a boyfriend, he sleep on this side, and my husband sleeps on this. Well, I just wanted to make sure I clarified that because it didn't come out right. Like, what what did she say? So, but I mean it just I didn't know y'all was like this. We not we not I ain't got no room in my life for another man.
SPEAKER_00I know I know a girl that works corporate at my company that is in a poly. Oh wow, marriage, oh shit and I'm like, it's it's her, it's two females and a male. And I'm like, that sounds exhausting. It does. I don't want to share my sound with anybody. I don't want to have to no no no, Elisa, it's not that way, it's not that way, it's the other way. Oh, yeah, but it's like if you ain't having to attend to one, you having to attend to the other, and then she just had a baby. He well, not just he's a few years old now, but she had a baby, so she's got a baby to contend with, and then a husband and a wife. Now, maybe they stay home and clean all the time. I hope. Maybe some somebody's gonna have to do something, like you're gonna have to. I mean, somebody gonna have to give and just do all the housework because I'm not gonna have no time.
SPEAKER_01Right, just just too much. I can't do that. Just with one one spouse is fine. I don't need multiple in my life.
SPEAKER_02I mean, go on, leave your life, right?
SPEAKER_00Right, I mean, be the happiest, but damn that sounds exhausting.
SPEAKER_01It does. God, just you tell me about it makes me exhaust.
SPEAKER_00Really, don't touch me. Good God, I can imagine how much sex goes on in the in her life if she's got two partners. Right.
SPEAKER_01That's too much.
SPEAKER_00Sometimes I just want to go to bed. Yeah, a lot of the times I just want to go to bed, you know.
SPEAKER_01Like I mean, sex is nice and everything, and I like it, and I get that on occasion. It's just not something I can do every day. Yeah, but it's not something that I just want to do all the time, every day. And maybe not with multiple people.
SPEAKER_00I don't know, maybe with two women it would be more like emotional, you know what I mean? I don't know. No, I don't need yeah, I don't need it, yeah.
SPEAKER_01I don't want to be emotional with nobody else either. I don't want to share my feelings.
SPEAKER_00I have a hard enough time explaining even knowing what the hell I'm thinking most of the time. And you want me to Right.
SPEAKER_01And conveying my feelings to my own husband sometimes. I mean, let alone trying to do it to multiple people.
SPEAKER_00I can't convey them to I can't convey them to my damn self a lot of the times because I mean a lot of the emotions that I know we're talking about are are extremely complicated. They are painful emotions, you know what I mean? You just don't know. Yeah, I mean, I don't know. Especially like I go through phases of I feel like I'm in one now with it where I'm just kinda like I remember about after the year mark of finding out about my dad, I went through a period of a few months where I was just kind of like cool. I wasn't thinking about it much, you know. And then it was a whole lot of I'm in one of those periods now where I'm just kinda like, I'm not I don't know, I don't feel like I have to do a lot of uh like reflection right now. It's pretty cut and dry. So I've just been kind of like Yeah, I mean I guess that is the goal, right? Is to be present.
SPEAKER_01Like, but that's hard for me sometimes, but as it will be, you know, you're still working out some things with that, but I mean you're managing your emotions and that's a big deal.
SPEAKER_00Yeah, it yeah. I've came came a long way. Yeah, you really have. I in a month it'll be the sixteenth of October be four years.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, and that's hard to believe it's already been four years, but you've done tremendous amount of work in that time on yourself too, and and getting through it.
SPEAKER_00I know you still got a road to go, but you're doing it. I feel like I am. I feel like I'm I'm conquering things that I've not been able to before, like my weight, for instance. You know, I've just but it would really was no secret to me. It's like, well, you probably shouldn't eat the family size bag of peanut butter MMs in a sitting.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah.
SPEAKER_00But I would do it. I mean, that was just my thing. Sugar was an addiction of mine, just like anything else, just like cigarettes or caffeine or whatever else, you know, it's it was the same for me. But it's also one of those things that's very tempting to me. I can't I don't eat sugar because if I do, if I taste sugar, yeah, it'll be on my mind for two days.
SPEAKER_01Yeah. I think that's what I'm trying to do with smoking, you know, like where I was saying, I'm trying to break that mental habit. Like I don't have the cravings for it, but I'm just breaking that mental habit of like find something else to do, get get it off your mind that you don't need a cigarette, you don't want a cigarette. You know, same kind of thing.
SPEAKER_02Just a comfort.
SPEAKER_00Same thing with food. Especially with food, because I know when I was a kid, that's what you do. You you eat it when you're lonely and you don't understand, and yeah.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I mean, you know, when I was as a kid, I wasn't smoking cigarettes to deal with my trauma at that point. It was complicated. Right, not till not well, not until like ninth grade. Yeah, that was me. Well, I was fifteen, tenth grade. Yeah, I was fourteen, thirteen, fourteen when I tried it with my cousin Amy. Shout out Dina.
SPEAKER_00Dina got me started on shout out Dina.
SPEAKER_01Oh god, best friend. I'm not sure.
SPEAKER_00I know, me too. I was just thinking about that. How about now my biological dad hasn't seen my mom obviously in 45 years. He smokes. He smokes. Uh she's the one that's got him started smoking. Oh shit. And he was 22. Oh man. So he made it through his teens without smoking. She got him smoking, and now he's 67 and still smokes. Well 'cause my mother was like, well, that's what she gave you was an illegitimate child and a and a bad habit. Right.
SPEAKER_01God. Wow. Well, best friend, what do you think we can about getting out of here for this week? We can do it. All right.
SPEAKER_00I think I think we can make anything out of anything. I think we just did. Turn shit into shinola since we got 1982.
SPEAKER_01That's right. Well, we'll tell y'all or we'll see y'all again next weekend. Y'all holla. We will. We'll tell y'all we'll see y'all. And I'm gonna tell y'all that I'm gonna holla holla. I'm not even gonna edit that. I'm not even gonna edit.
SPEAKER_00Don't holla. Hollow. Hollow.
