Don’t Let Fear Run Your Life - Calm Your Nervous System and Feel Safer

Fear is part of being human - but when it starts running your life instead of protecting you, it’s time to learn how to calm your nervous system and feel safer in your body.

In this episode, Julie Waite of Streetwise Defence is joined by Sadie Marshall, Co-founder of Take A Pause, to share practical, body-based tools to work with fear, reduce chronic stress, and build real emotional resilience.

This is not just theory. It’s real-life, accessible guidance for women who feel overwhelmed, anxious, stuck in stress, or disconnected from their bodies.

You’ll learn:

• Why fear feels so present in modern life
 • What happens in your body when fear is triggered
 • Why your body responds the same to real and imagined threats
 • How to recognise your personal fear signals
 • How chronic stress affects long-term health
 • Simple breath and body techniques to calm your nervous system
 • Why rest, joy and boundaries are essential - not indulgent
 • How trauma and triggers show up in the body
 • When therapy and support help healing
 • How to build long-term resilience and self-trust

Sadie also guides a short, practical breathing exercise you can use anytime to instantly feel calmer and more grounded.

If fear, anxiety or stress have been running parts of your life, this episode will help you understand what’s happening inside your body - and give you realistic tools to change it.

You are not broken. You are human. And you can learn to feel safer and more at ease in yourself.

Find Sadie at:
 Website: www.takeapause.co.uk
 Instagram: @tapwellbeing
 LinkedIn: Sadie Marshall

If you found this episode helpful, please follow the podcast and leave a review — it helps more women find this support.

Want to feel safer, stronger, and more prepared?
Join our community of people taking back control of their safety - and get instant access to our free self defense and safety tip downloads.

👉 Head to Streetwise Defence to grab your free resources and start your journey today.

Transcript

Julie Waite (00:01)

Fear is part of being human, but when it starts running our lives instead of protecting us, it's time to learn how to work with it. And that's what we're talking about today. Welcome to Self Defence and Personal Safety for Women, the podcast that helps you stay safe, feel strong, and take control of your personal safety, both physically and emotionally. I'm Julie Waite, Women's Safety Advocate and co-founder of Streetwise Defence.

And today I'm joined by Sadie Marshall, founder of Take A Pause, who supports teams musculoskeletal health through movement programmes and teaches nervous system regulation and stress management through breath work and other body-based practices.

Before we dive in, a quick favour, if you find this episode helpful, please follow the podcast and leave us a review. It really helps us reach more people who need this support. Let's get started.

Thanks for joining us today Sadie.

Sadie Marshall (00:57)

Thanks Julie, it's really nice to be here.

Julie Waite (01:00)

well, think it's such a very, such an important topic. It's just, it really dominates so much of people's lives. And even though it's a natural human emotion, it can very easily get out of balance. I'm just, would like to get your views. know you've done a lot of work around fear about why is it so present in modern life?

Sadie Marshall (01:24)

Yeah, I think there's two things that really stick out to me when I think about fear being so present in modern life. I think we have access to so much information now than any generation before us. So the range of events that can invoke fear in the body has just gone extreme to what kind of...

Julie Waite (01:39)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (01:54)

our parents' generation or my grandma's generation would have been exposed to. I was thinking about this earlier actually about how previously my nan's generation, they would just have their community around them and their life experience would really be based off of the people that they saw every day, their family, and the events would be very community-based. And so if a crisis or something happened, sometimes or normally it would happen in community.

Julie Waite (02:11)

you

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (02:23)

then you would just experience that directly and then normally you would have the community to also grieve with or be angry with or share that emotion with. So I think ⁓ that's one thing that now we're not so community based in terms of localised community that we have access to global news and global communities and global events and I just don't think our nervous systems were really designed.

that level of information.

I also think that people are quite disconnected from their bodies and because fear shows up in the body and it is a body-based experience, if people are disconnected and don't know how to move through it or recognise it, then it's just going to show up everywhere. And so there's like this internal phenomenon happening where people are

Julie Waite (03:16)

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (03:22)

disconnected from their bodies, their nervous systems. And then we have the external that's happening where we're just exposed to so much. So I think those two together is kind of, yeah.

Julie Waite (03:32)

Yeah.

It's a lot.

I mean, I've thought about this as well and I've had chats with my mum because she'll be watching the news and then she'll say, you know, I saw this happen or that happened in another country and I'm really upset and which is a natural human emotion to see suffering in another country, other people around the world. But she is someone that really, really takes everything. She takes everything on. She like takes everyone's kind of pain and emotions on.

And I had this conversation, the same similar conversation with her and I just said, we're not designed to take on and to observe all the pain and suffering in the world. Like the human body can't deal with that. Like you said, if you go back in time, even I often think back right the way back to, you know, kind of.

caveman time, your fear is there to keep you safe but it's kind of out of control in this modern world because there's so many, we're getting hit from so many sources like you said but then you're on your own to deal with it. it's a huge part of modern life unfortunately but it's, think you just like you said, a lot of people just accept it.

Sadie Marshall (04:36)

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes.

Julie Waite (04:54)

⁓

and maybe don't even realise the signals and things that happening ⁓ and the processes that are going on. So I wonder if you could maybe explain for people a bit more around the biology of fear and what is actually happening in your body when you feel those emotions.

Sadie Marshall (05:15)

Yeah, so fear is an emotion. So, I mean, there's a bit of debate around that in the scientific world, but we're going to disagree that fear is an emotion. so therefore it's like energy and motion, right? That's how we can kind of define an emotion. And it's going to be based off of either your senses or a memory. So either your sensory system is exposed to an event.

Julie Waite (05:24)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (05:45)

and your senses will feed back that event into the body and it will trigger a threat reflex. Or you might think of something, memory, a traumatic memory or a stressful memory and that will again feed back into that threat reflex which is located in the amygdala part of the brain. And that threat reflex will then generate symptoms in the body.

Julie Waite (06:04)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (06:14)

This is normally the fight flight or freeze response normally in freeze most people freeze or retreat and Then you'll have other symptoms, you know, it could be sweating heart rate increases trembling shaking Digestive issues because your digestion shuts down basically your body just triggers all of the kind of survival Mechanisms that you need in that moment to be safe

Julie Waite (06:19)

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (06:44)

What's quite interesting is that when the fear response, the threat reflex is activated, the length of time that that kind of activation stays present in your body stays for much longer than the event itself. And so this is why, you know, if something happens, like if you maybe walk out into the road and a car goes past and, you know, the car's gone, you're safe.

Julie Waite (07:03)

Right.

Sadie Marshall (07:14)

but you could be shaking for quite a long time, your heart could be racing for quite a long time. So it's there to keep you safe, but the body's response to fear happens for a prolonged period of time. And if that time lengthens quite a bit, then this is where we steer into trauma in the body. So this is kind of how trauma gets to be stored in the body.

Julie Waite (07:36)

Right.

Sadie Marshall (07:42)

So yeah, you have that event either from your memory or from your senses that then feeds into the brain. amygdala, which is the part responsible for the fear response, will then trigger your symptoms. another symptoms, for example, is your prefrontal cortex, which is the part of your brain responsible for logical and rational thinking. That really kind of bypasses and it diminishes.

Julie Waite (08:05)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (08:09)

so that that part of your brain can't really instruct your body to behave rationally. So that's kind of what happens to the body in simple terms. When something either happens externally through your senses or when you repeat a memory that's stressful and the same response happens.

Julie Waite (08:15)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Yeah, and it's a very natural response. We all need it to keep us safe. But I know you said then it can be activated by a memory and then it can also be activated by either a real fear or an imagined fear. So

Sadie Marshall (08:39)

it.

Julie Waite (08:55)

Could you talk a bit about that in that I'm guessing the mind there isn't distinguishing between whether there's actually something in front of us, like you said, you're about to get knocked down by a car or you're thinking about something that happened yesterday or last year or 10 years ago or imagining something that could happen in the future, maybe not even a survival type thing like getting knocked down. could be a...

worries about your job or your relationship so it's not really distinguishing between any of those things by the sounds of it.

Sadie Marshall (09:30)

Yeah, it's not an intelligent system. It's very generic. So it doesn't know the difference, as you say, between imagined and real threat. I like to see it as like a very, very sensitive part of the body. and it doesn't know what's real, what's not. So any kind of activation, whether it's through the memory or through something that you see, it will get activated.

the body doesn't know the difference, know, so the external world can present you something or your memory can, but the body goes through the same reaction, basically. And again, you know, it is there for our survival and I like to see it as feedback, really, you know, the journey that I've had with fear.

is very much, most of the time it's feedback rather than real. So when I change my mentality to see it as that, because most of the time that fear is generated in my body, I mean I've been lucky enough that I haven't been put through too many fearful, you know, traumatic experiences in my life I guess. I have of course had some, but most of the time, yeah, it's not real and so just learning.

to see it as feedback, it's telling me something, that can be quite helpful.

Julie Waite (10:56)

You said you'd had an experience with fear. Is that something you feel comfortable sharing some lessons from or how you've dealt with it?

Sadie Marshall (11:07)

Yeah, think I just... I've always been this sort of person that, you know, feel the fear and do it anyway. Because I feel like every time that I have done something that I'm fearful of, the other side of that is pretty amazing. And I feel like I just always meet a different part of myself, a new version of myself that didn't exist or that I hadn't connected with.

Julie Waite (11:15)

Mmm.

Sadie Marshall (11:36)

before something fearful. you know, this could be, I did a skydive, right? In Australia. Yeah, that was amazing. That's more like adrenaline, like, you know, and everything. But even at the moment, actually, it's quite interesting. So I started taking up aerial hoop classes, you know, like the hoop and you do like tricks and stuff. And it's so interesting. So there's like a mat.

Julie Waite (11:42)

wow. Yeah, that is pretty scary.

Mm.

Alright. Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (12:04)

below the hoop and you're not high up off the ground but anytime that they show us to do a trick where I have to go upside down or do something that's a little bit risky ⁓ my body just goes into a complete fear response and I'm just noticing that my body's like I don't want to do this, I don't want to do this and I can come in and kind of say to my body it's okay you're not going to die, you're not going to but I'm it's

Julie Waite (12:16)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (12:33)

experiencing

all of the symptoms, know heart rate, sweating, shaking, freezing and you know really nice that there's other like people there supporting you like you you can do it like you're fine it's all in your head. But even though I've done a lot of work on fear it's still so so present there and but then once you do it and once you do the thing

Julie Waite (12:46)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (12:57)

and you then come out of the other side of it, you're like, okay, I'm still alive, I'm still here, it's okay. And I think the more you can do that for me anyway, the more you kind of see, you can kind of befriend fear. You kind of see it as like, ooh, what is it, who can I be on the other side of this?

Julie Waite (13:02)

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah.

Because when you say that, it occurred to me, it's so sensitive, this system that we have. you're describing something there, you've got the mat, you know it's safe, you've seen other people doing it, rationally you know it's safe, but your body is like desperately trying to stop you from doing it. And I do think that a lot of people, and you know, I've been like this in the past on occasion, you can kind of get stuck in...

comfortable existence because that feeling is so, it's so unpleasant. And it's like you said, it's trying to kind of pick up on your own signals and realize what they are. And I then, guess, try and rationally...

talk yourself around to it. is difficult even when you know this is gonna be good for you, to still be feeling those extreme responses in your body. they are horrible. mean, I've always been fearful of public speaking. And to the point where I'd like, I'd...

would just avoid it at all costs. Just even the thought of it made me so, so uncomfortable. And then in a job, I mean, it was a long time ago now, about 15 plus years ago, I started having to do it and I thought, right, I need to get through this. So I just put myself forward for every.

speaking thing there was and then I got to a point where I'd done it that much that I realized I was okay. There was still a low level of nerves but not to the point where you know I couldn't sleep and I felt sick and it was overshadowing everything that I did. But it is such a sensitive kind of system when you think about it. It's just kind of desperately trying to protect us from anything you know even whether it's humiliation, pain,

⁓ Just kind of doing something that's a bit different.

Sadie Marshall (15:20)

Yeah, yeah, 100%. And I think as well what's quite interesting is that the response and the physiology of what your body actually goes through is pretty much in direct contrast to homo stasis, which is our body's optimal state.

Julie Waite (15:37)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (15:37)

So

what I find quite interesting is that, know, homo stasis is the body's optimal state. This is when our blood sugar, our pH levels, our heart rate, our digestion, everything is balanced and at an optimal state so that we can show up, feel good internally, and also show up in our best capacity. ⁓ And that, you know, if we're in that state for a prolonged period of time, then we

Julie Waite (15:53)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (16:07)

can say that we are going to live longer and that actually we are just happier and healthier people for ourselves and for society. Whereas fear is it's an immediate kind of response but if you're in it for a prolonged period of time so fear when it shows up as like an immediate quick response is healthy for the reasons we've discussed it can save us, it can show us maybe where we have blocks or

Julie Waite (16:11)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (16:37)

where we're limited, it can give us some adrenaline to, you know, do something that's healthy. But when it starts being prolonged, you're starting to live in that state instead of homostasis, which is pretty much direct opposite. And then therefore this is where illness, chronic stress, disease, depression, mental health, we can go on, will then start to develop because your body is in that less optimal state.

Julie Waite (17:07)

Yeah, you've just reminded me actually of ⁓ when COVID came about, ⁓ obviously everyone was in a fear state then. And I remember, you know, all the uncertainty, it's horrendous time for everyone. I was self-employed at the time, you know, all my clients were stopping work, I no money coming in and it was just a constant state of fear. You know, the news, everything. And it showed up for me.

Sadie Marshall (17:33)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (17:35)

I didn't realise it until much later in this most horrendous stomach pains and I had these stomach pains pretty much day and night for about three months and they were to the point where I actually went and tried to get you know medical help for it

Sadie Marshall (17:42)

you

Julie Waite (17:55)

not that you wanted to be going to the doctors at that point, you didn't want to go anywhere or do anything, but it was that bad that I thought there's obviously something, something is wrong with me. And it wasn't until I got much further down the line and I saw a specialist and she said, you've got to relax, you holding all the tension in your stomach. And that fear was just basically like shutting down my digestive system. And that was just causing this pain. And

Sadie Marshall (18:03)

Yeah.

Yes.

Julie Waite (18:22)

And I did notice it then that, you know, when I get fearful, like you said, it's about knowing your own kind of signals. I think there's some, like you said, that everyone can feel like the heart rate and all of that. But for me, I was holding tension. was like clenching my stomach. So I guess it's like kind of, you know, doing the plank 24, seven. I was holding my stomach all the time. And even once I knew about it, I then it took a lot of effort to then kind of keep noticing it over and over.

Sadie Marshall (18:46)

Mm-hmm.

Julie Waite (18:53)

and over over again like okay you need to relax now you're doing it again and you kind of become this part of my life at that time but it made me ill it was horrible it was horrible experience to go through and i think if you don't know that

Sadie Marshall (19:06)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (19:11)

You know, I honestly thought there was something wrong with me that, you know, some other random medical thing. I couldn't, I didn't relate it to that. And I think there's probably a lot of people that have experienced in lots of different symptoms and illnesses, like you said, because they maybe don't realize that it's the fear.

Sadie Marshall (19:20)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (19:33)

or the worries or whatever it is they've got going on that is kind of causing that shutdown because you're not in the state where your body can rest and digest and do all the healing that it needs to do.

Sadie Marshall (19:46)

Yeah, exactly.

It's not like the stress doesn't cause the illness, but the stress response stops the body from, you know, doing the things that it's supposed to do to prevent your illness. And, you know, I was exactly the same. have my first and ever and only and I'm really lucky I've never had it again. But during Covid I had my first panic attack and I called an ambulance. ⁓

Julie Waite (19:55)

Right, yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right?

Great, well yeah, because

it's extreme, isn't

Sadie Marshall (20:14)

I thought I was having heart attack. I'd never

had it before, you know, and at this time I'd actually just finished my yoga teacher training. So I was like, you know, pretty thinking I was pretty calm and pretty relaxed. And yeah, just one night it just came on and, you know, because of so much pressure from the outside.

Julie Waite (20:25)

You're pretty calm.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (20:35)

And yeah, I called an ambulance and when I got to hospital, I felt really embarrassed because they was like, there's nothing, you know, this could be a panic attack. There's nothing wrong with you. And yeah, I just, don't, I don't think people realize enough that stress, yeah, can, can just be the trigger for so many other things, long-term health and chronic issues. My journey with stress, you know, from the, from the ages of between 18 to about 25, I lived in chronic

Julie Waite (20:45)

Yeah.

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (21:05)

stress so I didn't know what it felt like in my body to be relaxed. I hadn't experienced that so therefore I didn't know what I was missing I didn't know that there was anything wrong because my baseline was just in the sympathetic state you know in the stress response and it was actually only when yoga you know I started practicing yoga more and

Julie Waite (21:12)

you

Sadie Marshall (21:31)

that the practice really is aimed to get you in a rested state that I was like, what's this feeling that I haven't felt before, you know, in many, many years? And yeah, you know, that's why I've stuck to the practice and it's why I do what I do now. But yeah, I think so many people, you know, I know people, family, friends that are living in chronic stress, you know, they talk loud, they walk fast.

Julie Waite (21:35)

Mm-hmm.

Gosh.

Yeah, I do.

Sadie Marshall (22:00)

They're shallow breathing, they're reactive, they don't know how to respond, they react, they haven't got a hold over their emotions. You know, all of these things are a sign of your living in chronic stress because you can't regulate, you can't see the bigger picture, your nervous system is wired, really. That's what it comes down to.

Julie Waite (22:26)

I mean, I'm just thinking then if you are in that state, how do you, and that's your normal state and has been for many years, how do you even realise that's what it is? mean, you, you know, you said you found the yoga, but, have you got any suggestions for people that might just be listening, thinking, ⁓ that might be me.

Sadie Marshall (22:47)

Yeah, I mean I am gonna push yoga because that is my journey and that's what I teach and I think it's ⁓ such a holistic practice. There's so many different styles as well so I would say if you go to one yoga class and you don't like that, try another. There's like loads of different styles that you can try. Obviously breathing and meditation which kind of all forms under yoga anyway. But going out in nature, know...

Julie Waite (22:52)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (23:15)

Taking yourself away on holiday, like maybe like a weekend of like no phones, no screens, no technology, but getting yourself in nature, in like a natural lake and water. Water is really healing for the body. Just getting into, going back to basics, you know, it's really not that complex. I think like with so many modalities out there at the moment, in terms of like healing and wellbeing, people can get quite overwhelmed with...

what should I be doing? You know, what I do and what I teach people, come back to your body, come back to your breath and come back to your natural state. And once you do that, then everything else kind of falls into place. I think if anyone's listening into this and they're like, I may be living in chronic stress, you know, look up the term homostasis, you know, recognize what a homostasis is and consider if you live.

in that state or if you're living in another state and then yeah just bring it back to basics body movement breath nutrition environment you know all of these things connection authentic human connection you know people are quite lonely at the moment there's also been quite interesting studies about how ⁓ like authentic human connection can actually reduce that threat reflex that we spoke about

Julie Waite (24:15)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (24:41)

So if you have like community and like real human connection, then that can just help reduce the part of your brain that's responsible for that threat reflex. So yeah, all of those things, not saying anything, you know, groundbreaking here. It's all quite simple and back to basics, but I think for me anyway, when I'm overwhelmed or when I've been working too hard or when I've been on a phone too long, it's like, okay, bring it back to basics now. Is my diet okay? Am I getting enough sleep? Have I spent time with friends?

Julie Waite (24:41)

Right.

Yeah.

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (25:10)

Have I experienced joy? Have you got any hobbies that actually make you happy? We're not just supposed to wake up and work and go to sleep. We're here to experience life. Do you have anything that brings you joy? And if you don't, think back to when you were a child. What did you enjoy? I think this is the reason why I found Ariel Hoop recently because...

Julie Waite (25:13)

Yeah.

Mm.

Hmm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (25:33)

I used to do, you know, when I was younger, used to love performing and like, you know, dancing and being kind of show girly, the outfits and stuff. so, yeah, because I've been working really hard the past few years, building my business and everything, I was like, you know what, there's nothing in my diary, like that is scheduled for joy and I need to schedule some joy in my life. And so I'm definitely a beginner. I've got bruises everywhere. I'm not very good, but.

Julie Waite (25:41)

Yeah.

Yeah.

you

Sadie Marshall (26:03)

It brings me so much joy. I literally, when I leave, I'm like buzzing, you know, I'm like, oh my God, I feel so alive right now. And it's honestly been one of the best things I could have done for my wellbeing recently, you know, so yeah, joy, fine joy.

Julie Waite (26:06)

Yeah.

Definitely. think it's like as humans, we've forgotten what it's all about. And, a separate discussion is there's a lot of programming, there's a lot of control in our society, you know,

the powers that be want people to do certain things. want, you know, they want people to go to work. They want people to conform. They want people to consume. And actually fear is the biggest motivator for consuming because, you know, you feel fearful, you feel stressed and

What do you do? You go out and you, get some chocolate, you get a bottle of wine, you go and buy yourself something nice to make you feel good. And, you know, it might sound a bit skeptical, but that's what the, the basis of pretty much all marketing and selling is built on it. You're either selling a fear or you're selling, some sort of like, passion or enjoyment. but we've

Sadie Marshall (26:59)

it.

Julie Waite (27:17)

Along the way, like you said there, we've forgotten what it means to be just a human being. And we've made everything so complicated. I try and remember sometimes, like I said to my kids just recently, because they were arguing about phones and social media and just I'm constantly like tracking them down, getting the phones off them. It's like a constant battle. And I said to them, like, we are just animals. Humans are just animals and you need to like eat. ⁓

sleep, you know, make the next generation survive, but we've made it so complicated for ourselves. And now we think that we have to go on social media and be better than someone else or compare ourselves to someone. We have to, you know, watch an endless like random videos or scary things. But like you said, if you can strip all that back and just come back to nature, back to what you're eating, seeing people.

doing something you enjoy it can really make the difference in how you feel but you have to be really disciplined in doing that and I know from my own journey in trying to do this you kind of set off with an intention right you know I'm going to take things I've already done it this year I'm going to take things much slower this year I'm going to calm down

I'm going to take more time for me and then all of a sudden you're flapping around trying to sort out kids, family, work, everything and all the time and things that you've put in for yourself have gone out the window. it's, you've got to try and be disciplined with it, I think. And like you said, think finding a class or scheduling something, a yoga class or a fun class, like you said, is a good way because you've kind of made a commitment there to do it.

Sadie Marshall (29:03)

Yeah, definitely. And I think just accepting that, you know, our nervous systems have been building since we were babies. So our nervous system is shaped by our environment, by our systems. And if, you know, for me, for example, when I was in the kind of early 20s leading into it, my nervous system was comfortable in stress. So therefore, when I

Julie Waite (29:12)

Hmm.

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (29:30)

got myself out of stress, my nervous system was like, no, no, no, go back to stress because that's comfortable. Actually feeling rested wasn't comfortable because it wasn't known. My nervous system hadn't got used to that. And so I think people need to understand first of all, where's your baseline? What is your baseline? What is the condition? What is the state of your nervous system? First of all, and then start to train it.

Julie Waite (29:37)

Right.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (29:59)

into the way that you want it to be. you know, I've been practicing yoga for 11 years and honestly it wasn't really until like I started to become like more like a daily habit that I really started to train my nervous system to be in a different state and it and your nervous system just has to be trained. You have to really do the practices, do whatever like we spoke about and just understand that if you have been living in chronic stress.

Julie Waite (30:10)

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Sadie Marshall (30:26)

then that is going to feel way more comfortable initially at the beginning than feeling rested and feeling at peace. And you have to just keep putting yourself back into it so that over time the stress then becomes, ⁓ I don't want to feel that anymore. I want to go back to the peace I've been cultivating. So that when something like fear or the threat reflex happens in the body, it's no longer your baseline. It's no longer something that you're used to.

Julie Waite (30:31)

Mm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (30:56)

It's something that, ⁓ that's not comfortable for me. I want to get myself out of it. And I think maybe the reason so many people live in fear for so long is because they're just so comfortable there. And they haven't trained their body to feel something else.

Julie Waite (31:13)

Yeah, I know what you mean and I think for women especially it's hard to rest and you know if you're living in fear or stress like you said you have to find a way for your body to come back to that calm state and I'm terrible at this I'm trying to get better but

Sadie Marshall (31:31)

Thank

Julie Waite (31:38)

just finding it so hard to rest, because whenever I rest, I feel guilty that I'm not doing something. And I'm sure there's so many people think this, just, and it's training yourself, because you've trained yourself, or you've been trained or whatever, to be constantly, you know, meeting other people's needs, doing the house, doing the meal, do whatever it is. And then if you're not doing that, it feels so alien to you.

Sadie Marshall (31:56)

Thank

Okay.

Julie Waite (32:05)

It was real effort to make yourself stop and kind of question, Do I need to go and do this cleaning and these jobs and these things now? Or could I take an hour? I love reading. Could I take an hour in the middle of the afternoon on a weekend and go and sit and read? Well, that's like unheard of for me because I'm normally like shepherding kids around or trying to catch up with jobs or whatever. And I've started trying to do that and it does...

It feels very weird, but I notice it and I notice the benefits because I wear this Oura ring. So this is like your smart watch or whatever.

Sadie Marshall (32:41)

Yes.

Julie Waite (32:46)

And I hardly ever, it tells you like periods of stress during the day, periods of rest. I hardly ever get periods of rest in the day unless I'll go and sit and read. Even if I watch TV or other things like that, I don't fully rest so that I know for me that's my way of fully resting. But even then, still feel guilty for doing it.

Sadie Marshall (32:57)

Yeah. No.

Yeah.

Yeah, yeah exactly like you say.

And you know, women, are, you know, naturally, most of us innately caregivers. We care. We want to make sure our children, our family, our mothers, our sisters, our friends are there. And we're pretty much, if someone comes to you, you'll be there. know, I think boundaries is a word that, you know, we all need to learn. And, you know, just thinking about my mom and sort of her generation, you know, the idea of self-love.

Julie Waite (33:14)

Mm-hmm.

Yes.

Sadie Marshall (33:38)

It's probably non-existent. You know, this is this is a pretty new Term that's kind of been fed in to sort of our generation and the generation before but yeah the idea of filling your cup up first is a bit like ⁓ no, that's that's not very comfortable. That's not the way and I think as well like again if we're looking back through kind of an evolution point of view, right? Most of the time women back then they had more time

Julie Waite (33:39)

Hmm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (34:08)

because they didn't work and so they could be the caregivers and so that's why that kind of ideology has been passed down to us. But now women nowadays, we haven't got the luxury of just staying at home and ⁓ cooking and cleaning and being there for the family. We have to do the career and we have to do everything else and so yeah, we can't do it all.

Julie Waite (34:09)

Hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (34:38)

I just think like I say this like you know my best friend she's a single mum and she has a really demanding job and I just say to her you know you you will be a better mum and you will better at your job when you are full you know you when you are stressed and when you are low mood your children feel that your partner feels that your work will feel it so this idea that we should just

Julie Waite (35:06)

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (35:08)

keep pushing and and not rest it's it's false it's not true it's something we have to actively unlearn it's not just going to happen we have to actively put ourselves in rest in state we have to actually actively talk to our family and partners and children to teach them you know no I'm doing this right now teach them that it's okay to set boundaries say to your partner I need your support right

Julie Waite (35:14)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (35:38)

now

because I'm going to go to the park and I'm going to read for half an hour and I'm not going bring my phone and your body is going to be like no no no no no don't do that I can't do that and you know this is where self-responsibility and willpower and just the knowing the inner knowing of on the other side of that you know I'm going to be a better person that's where that kind of comes in.

Julie Waite (36:01)

Yeah and if someone's listening thinking okay right I'm going to try something and I know you said about yoga there's I know there's lots of different types of yoga like you said what's a nice gentle you know introduction to yoga so that you know if you've never done anything like that before or you're not feeling particularly flexible and you don't want to be

feel like you're competing with anyone else in the class that you can go along and just kind of ease into it what would you recommend for people?

Sadie Marshall (36:32)

Yeah.

So one of my favourite stars of yoga ⁓ is yoga, yin yoga it's called. And it's not completely comfortable because you're holding stretches for like three minutes at a time. But what's really, really impactful about yin yoga is that when you hold the stretch for that length of time, the pressure of the stretch and the release of the stretch goes all the way down to our fascia.

Julie Waite (36:40)

Right?

Right.

Sadie Marshall (37:02)

which is kind of located in like the connective tissue part of our bodies. And this is where like really old energy and old stress and sometimes trauma can be stored. So normally if you like go for a stretch, you know, and you just hold it for 30 seconds or a minute, it's going to go straight to the major muscle group. In yin yoga, when you hold particular stretches, the stretches are normally done like lying down as well. Like there's no standing positions.

Julie Waite (37:06)

Hmm.

Right.

Sadie Marshall (37:27)

and you normally have like a blanket and some blocks and some bolsters so that you kind of feel comfortable in the stretch. And honestly, it's just feeling that release afterwards. it really, you really understand the mind body connection when you've had that session of yoga, because once you get the release internally, the mind is just, you know, so much space has been created, so much clarity, so much space.

Julie Waite (37:28)

Right.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (37:56)

because when we create space internally, through our muscles, through our fascia, then we also, that has a direct impact on ⁓ your mind and how your mind operates. So Yin Yoga is great. There's also Yoga Nidra, right, which is just lying down. This is probably one of my favorite styles of yoga now. However, I will just say, when I first started yoga, that would have been my worst nightmare.

Julie Waite (38:14)

Right.

Sadie Marshall (38:25)

because lying down and being still with my thoughts as a 20 year old, you know, at that time I didn't know emotional intelligence, I didn't know self-regulation and I hadn't really learnt to sit with myself. So at that time I needed, I would say if you have like a very heavy mind and you struggle to sit and just be with yourself, I would go for a much more active, you know, rocket or vinyasa or hatha the style of yoga.

Julie Waite (38:30)

Right.

Sadie Marshall (38:55)

because what that aims to do is kind of put your body through a bit of an intense workout so that when you get to the end of the practice, you can then relax. ⁓ So it really depends on your type. If you're like a really busy professional and you're like constant constant and you just feel like you need to rest and relax, yoga nidra or yin yoga is the slow restorative type yogas. If you feel like you can't sit still, that you...

don't really feel comfortable sitting with your mind or your body, then you might want to go for a more Hatha, Rocket or Vinyasa style yoga. Put your body through a bit of sweat and a workout and then that will then help you feel relaxed afterwards.

Julie Waite (39:40)

Yeah, because sometimes you need that kind of movement and energy at the beginning then to be able to relax afterwards, don't you? I quite like the sound of Yin. I've never done Yin yoga. I like the sound of what you said about releasing as well, because I think most people in this day and age have traumas, stresses and things that have experiences they've had in their lives that...

Sadie Marshall (39:46)

Exactly. Yeah, fill in.

Julie Waite (40:08)

we probably haven't released properly. I know I've certainly got things and you do a bit of work on them but you know the body does store it and I do like the idea of that as well. If these people that have you know they've experienced something and they've got the trauma I'm guessing that their levels of fear can be

Sadie Marshall (40:21)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (40:35)

⁓ or their fear response can be much heightened. ⁓ Have you got thoughts around people that have experienced traumas and what kind of practices or what they can do to help with that?

Sadie Marshall (40:52)

Yeah, our traumas are really ours and they're really personal so it really depends on what they've been through but obviously if someone has a trauma and they're exposed to something that can trigger that trauma so if for example someone walked down the street and their bag got snatched it could be anything from you know walking down that same street again or it could be you know if they ate Chinese food that night maybe they never eat Chinese food again

Julie Waite (41:07)

Mm-hmm.

Right.

Sadie Marshall (41:22)

There could be so many things that someone associates with that trauma that could trigger the trauma. So this is what when we say about the fear response being quite generic, it can be a trigger from a very acute situation that took place. So something like someone taking your bag and just running off, that's quite an acute situation.

Julie Waite (41:29)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (41:49)

Or people can have trauma from prolonged exposure to stress trauma. So this could be like a dysfunctional marriage or an unhealthy marriage or family dynamics. So this is why it's so broad in terms of what it can capture. But in terms of the support and the help out there, obviously sort of talking therapies and narrative-based therapies have been shown to be really, really effective in this area.

Julie Waite (41:53)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (42:18)

And there's quite a specific process that the therapist or the clinician will go through. So this could be like CBT, for example, or kind of other based narrative type therapies where they'll get the individual to talk about the traumatic event and sort of really go into quite a lot of detail about what happened. And just to like repeat the narrative, just keep talking about it and talking about it so that...

Julie Waite (42:28)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (42:47)

you kind of become bored by it, that you kind of have normalised whatever happened. And then the process is then finding a positive in that situation. And then once you find the positive in the situation, then it's really important to link that positive back to the traumatic event. And that kind of completes the healing cycle. And it has to go in that order as well. So if we just take the example of like the woman that got

Julie Waite (43:07)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (43:16)

you know, her bag snatched. She could have like, you know, ate some Chinese food, gone to get, got her bag snatched, was walking home. And then now she doesn't take that route anymore. She doesn't eat Chinese food and she no longer wears a bag, right, going out. She also stopped going out as much and she's at home and she's taken up fantasy books that she enjoys, right?

Julie Waite (43:34)

Thank

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (43:44)

So

the process could be that you talk through the event, you go into specific details, allow the body to normalise it, allow the body to talk about the event without going into that stress response. Then the positive could be, well, you know, I don't eat like bad Chinese food anymore, so I've become healthier in what I eat. I've also taken up fantasy books, which I really enjoy. And, you know, I've met some new friends or I'm part of a book club that does that.

and ⁓ now I can now walk back down that street despite the trauma happened knowing the trauma happened but I'm able to do that so you have a sense of reward that comes out of the traumatic event it's kind of like knowing that you've come out the other side and the body needs to have that reward element the linking back to the traumatic event in order to heal the cycle

Julie Waite (44:20)

Yeah.

I think.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (44:41)

So.

Julie Waite (44:42)

So you're

not just burying it away, you're not just burying it away and trying to not think about it. Sometimes when you try not to think about something, that thing just gets bigger and bigger and bigger then, till it looms over you.

Sadie Marshall (44:47)

Yeah.

And you're not also just replacing it with a positive thought. Like you're not like, you know, that happened, but you know, I'm part of this book club now. It's like, okay, but then how can we link it back to the traumatic event? So I guess it's association, right? So that your brain doesn't associate it with the trauma anymore, that it associates it with the present moment, with who you are now. Because that's not real anymore. That's in the past, but let's focus on who you are now. So.

Julie Waite (44:57)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (45:21)

That's really good therapy. I would say like if people do notice symptoms that you know you don't do a certain thing or you avoid a place or you avoid people or you avoid a certain thing because you have this like uneasy feeling that could be a sign that there is maybe a trauma related to that and you know so many people have like suppressed trauma or like suppressed memories that

Julie Waite (45:37)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (45:47)

they wouldn't even know so they might not remember the event but they might have the symptoms and this is where you know support from a therapist you know it's really really important to to kind of guide them then back to the event get to the root of it and then go through the cycle of healing ⁓ and then we have things like EMDR which is like the eye sort of therapy where you kind of move your eyes like that like

Julie Waite (46:06)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (46:15)

really fast from side to side and then you relay the traumatic event and ⁓ I don't really know the ins and outs of what's going on but it's supposed to allow your brain to kind of process it or I think it actually has to do with the amygdala, the threat response that the eye movement reduces it and if that associates with the memory then that's how that helps but from my understanding of what I've read about EMDR I haven't had any direct

Julie Waite (46:37)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (46:45)

experience with that type of therapy before but it's more kind of appropriate for acute traumatic experiences rather than prolonged traumatic experiences. And then I guess the therapies that I would be most interested in are kind of physical therapies, so like shaking the body, you know, we know that this is what animals do in the wild when they expose themselves to something traumatic or stressful.

Julie Waite (47:09)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (47:14)

Just shaking the body, again, I would definitely look into this is a particular style of therapy and it should be done guided and with the support. I mean, shaking just generally can be good to just regulate your nerves and get it out. But if you're doing it for a specific trauma, healing, having someone guide you there, because I've done it myself through different modalities. And yeah, when it comes through the body, it can be a real...

Julie Waite (47:27)

Yeah, yeah.

Sadie Marshall (47:42)

tears, shaking, it can be a very physical so having support and guidance is really important.

Julie Waite (47:50)

And so are there any other practical things that people can do to help them build resilience and get out of this fear response and you know, into that more calmer body and mind?

Sadie Marshall (48:02)

Yeah, think just, you know, really taking responsibility for what you're feeding into your body and, you know, that really kind of self-responsibility is so important, you know, when it comes to, for example...

how much screen time you have or if you're watching the news or the media. know, understanding that the human psychology, we have like a negative bias and this basically means that we react more and we click more on things that have negative headlines. There's been loads of data and studies about this, but articles with like more negative words will get more clicks and people will go more into that because again, it's a survival mechanism compared to if they

Julie Waite (48:42)

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (48:47)

were told positive news, people have a higher reaction to if they hear negative news. So just understanding that the media, that social media, they are businesses, they are there to make money and they can be used in a really amazing way and for entertainment and for connection but it is your responsibility to choose who you are following, what accounts you are engaging in, what news you are listening to. I personally don't watch them.

Julie Waite (49:15)

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (49:17)

news anymore. I think you're the same, you know, after COVID.

Julie Waite (49:21)

Yeah. Watch

it not COVID. I've stopped. I completely stopped. I'll turn it down. So if we're in the car and we've got the radio on, I turn it down and I'll say to the kids, they mean they're to it now because I've done it for like five years. But I'll say to them, we don't need to hear that. If I want to find out about something, I'll go and find out about it. I don't want to hear three headlines of doom. And maybe they throw in one positive news article at the end. That's not.

Sadie Marshall (49:24)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (49:48)

what the world is like, it's giving you an unbalanced view. But there's not, people think I'm a bit weird when I tell them, I literally do not watch the news at all or listen. But I don't care, I feel a lot better since.

Sadie Marshall (49:49)

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm exactly

the same. When I tell my family I don't watch the news, it's so unheard of. it's such a... For us anyway, I remember growing up at home, we would watch the news at 12, at 6pm and at 10pm. We would actually call it 10 o'clock tea. It would be a social gathering, where we would have our tea, maybe have a sandwich and watch the news.

Julie Waite (50:18)

Yeah.

Mm.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (50:30)

And that was just, I think that's a normal part of family life. And I think when you actually realise, ⁓ I'm actually an autonomous being and I can choose what I feed into my body, it's scary again at first because it's not used to. You've been conditioned to live and take in things for many, many years. But when you just actively go and choose what you're feeding in, then your life...

Julie Waite (50:41)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (50:57)

drastically beginning to change, you know, and I think you have to put yourself in environments, you know, if you have a fear, for example, of men, do you have any healthy male friends or role models or like, you putting yourself in the company of men that are healthy to show you that there is a different way? Are you following healthy masculine men online or are you just seeing, you know,

Julie Waite (51:17)

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (51:25)

the unhealthy side of it. So I think we just really have to take that self responsibility and really seek out what, ⁓ you know, if we just sit back and don't do anything, then the things that we're being fed are going to be harmful to us. We have to actively choose to even not engage, but then also replace it with something else. Because when we have space, that space wants to be filled. So if you just stop watching the news, your body's gonna just naturally and don't fill it with anything else.

Julie Waite (51:25)

Yeah.

Hmm.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Sadie Marshall (51:54)

the body's gonna just be like, I wanna watch the news again. Whereas if you replace it something else, then you're changing the habit.

Julie Waite (51:58)

Mm.

Yeah, definitely. there is, you know, many years ago, like going back like 20 years, I worked in PR and I worked briefly in like policy. So I went along to things like the political party conferences. I worked with journalists and everything is so twisted and there is an agenda for everything. the, you know, the...

all of these things that we see coming through, whether it's, you know, the immigration, whether it's men versus women, there always has to be someone against something because there has to be that kind of level of fear and then you can get people to do what you want. you know, I just think when you kind of know that and almost like... ⁓

keep reminding yourself of that, it makes you feel much more powerful because I'm not, my day isn't going to be thrown off because of a headline.

Sadie Marshall (53:04)

you

Julie Waite (53:09)

that's meant to get everyone against, you know, whatever is going on, immigrants or whatever topic of the day it is. I'm not having my entire day thrown off for that. I'm not going to have like fear and panic and you know, no, I'm focused on my day, my life, you know, the family, the things that I want to do.

Sadie Marshall (53:14)

Yeah. Yeah.

Yes.

Julie Waite (53:30)

And it's very powerful when you do that and you give yourself permission, don't need to engage in all this stuff anymore. I don't need to scroll through the things. I can unfollow these accounts, whatever it is that makes you feel uncomfortable. like you say, replace it with something else. Replace it with some nature or some positive news or, you know, something funny. Like, we don't laugh enough as humans, I don't think, these days. So something that makes you laugh.

Sadie Marshall (53:47)

Yeah.

Okay.

Julie Waite (54:00)

Rather than thinking you have to go down this route that we've always gone down of, we have to watch the news, I have to be informed, I have to know what's going on. Well, you will be informed one way or another. I've not watched the news in five years and people tell me when stuff's going on and you I am on social media so I do see things just inadvertently but I've not suffered from not knowing what policy and what politician and who said what.

Sadie Marshall (54:17)

Yeah.

Yeah.

Julie Waite (54:29)

So you just have to kind of like you said, self responsibility, isn't it? And just like empowering yourself, I think.

Sadie Marshall (54:35)

Yeah,

you hit the nail on the head that powerful feeling, there's nothing quite like it. You know, knowing that when I walk into a room or if I go down to, you know, if I go and see my nan or my family and they're talking about something that's quite stressful, I'm just like...

Julie Waite (54:39)

Mmm. Mmm.

Sadie Marshall (54:53)

I'm not stressed right now, I don't have that response to that because I'm not engaging with it and I don't want to engage with it. yeah, once you get past the uncomfortable feeling and being okay with being misunderstood a little bit, then it's... Yeah, basically.

Julie Waite (54:55)

Mm.

and

Yeah.

People thinking you're a weirdo.

Okay, well, I thought what we how we could finish it. I think there's a lot for people to kind of think through their, like, maybe step back and do a bit of self analysis and just stop and think, right, okay, what am I fearful of what

What state am I in most of the time some of the time? How am I reacting to things? There's lots of questions for people to go through there I'm gonna just ask in a minute if you could maybe do a breath work practice with us and give people maybe three top takeaways that they can do Before we do that, could you just tell us a little bit about what you do and where people can find you? I know you go into businesses and work with The employees to help them with their well-being so if people are in

interested in that and other things that you do, could you give us a bit of an overview?

Sadie Marshall (56:08)

Yeah, of course. So ⁓ I am the co-founder of Take a Pause and this was really created because ⁓ I spent many, many years stressed at work and then I would leave work and do yoga and feel not stressed. And then over time I thought, something's wrong here. You know, it shouldn't be that I have to leave work to find peace and calm in my mind and body. So we've created programs, we do workshops, we also do day retreats.

Julie Waite (56:23)

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (56:36)

that is all about what I've spoken about today, bringing people back to the basics, bringing them back to their body, teaching them how to regulate their nervous systems, very simple basic movements to move stress and pressure out of the body. You know, we weren't made to sit for seven hours at a day. That's not what makes the body, you know, optimal. I'm just looking for ways to make the body optimal, to make the mind optimal in like really accessible ways. So...

bringing that into the workplace, creating out and carving time in the working day for people to move, breathe, rest, so that they can learn that feeling, right, of what we was talking about, so that they can learn what homostasis is and what safety and rest feels like in their body throughout the day. So that hopefully they can train it to become more normal for themselves and they can show up better at work, but they can also show up better, you know, for their families and friends.

Julie Waite (57:33)

that sounds great because you spend so much time at work that if that time when you're at work you're in a stressed state

that's going to impact you, even if you are able to then go and calm down at home, it's going to impact you and it's going to impact the workplace as well because you're not going to be as productive, you're not going to have as many ideas, be as creative. So I think, you know, there's benefits for the employees, but also for the employer as well there when you've got a calm, happy, you know, motivated workforce, you're going to...

Sadie Marshall (57:47)

Yeah.

Julie Waite (58:08)

everyone's going to be more productive. So where can people find you? What's your website?

Sadie Marshall (58:15)

Yeah,

so takeapause.co.uk is my website. I'm also on LinkedIn, just my personal account where I share lots of stuff on there. And on Instagram, we have an account, tapwellbeing. And that's where you can find me. Perfect.

Julie Waite (58:31)

great, well I'll link those below

so before we finish, what would you say to people three things that they can take away from today?

Sadie Marshall (58:40)

think the first really important thing is ⁓ understanding that our body's natural state is homostasis and that we have a state that is available and accessible to us if we seek it, that is optimal, that is rested, that is at peace. If you're not familiar with the term, I would say just do a bit of digging, looking into it and find practices, find environments, make sure you're surrounded by people, make sure your work environment.

Julie Waite (58:48)

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (59:10)

all of the things in your life ultimately can complement that state and hopefully keep you in that state. So you know that is that is our natural state, it is our optimal state and we all deserve to feel like it I genuinely believe. The second one I would say is find your breath. I know we're going to do some breathing now but this is one of the biggest game changers you know coming back to that self-responsibility.

Julie Waite (59:32)

Okay.

Sadie Marshall (59:40)

can all control our breath at any given moment. It is a hidden superpower that we haven't even explored fully yet. Any given moment, whether you're in a conversation with someone, whether you're out on the street, whether you're driving or commuting, you can alter your breath to change your internal state. So if you haven't built a relationship or a connection with your breath, I would definitely start that. And the final one is, you know, seek support, community

Julie Waite (59:44)

Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm. Okay.

Sadie Marshall (1:00:10)

therapy, coaches, this journey of self-improvement, self-development, moving through fears and traumas, you don't have to walk it alone. There is so much information out there that I think it's really important to have personalised support in this day and age. And for me anyway, when it comes to my own self-development and growth, I've had three different therapists, I've worked with two different

Julie Waite (1:00:31)

Mm.

Sadie Marshall (1:00:40)

coaches and every time that I work with these people I come out the other side just completely different and changed and altered and we are sensitive beings, we feel a lot, there's nothing wrong with you, our senses and our nervous system, it's how we're made. So getting that support, knowing that you're not alone I think is really important.

Julie Waite (1:00:54)

Yeah.

you

that's great. That's really, really good advice. And I just echo that to say, yeah, there's nothing wrong with getting therapy. I don't know if there's still a stigma attached to it. think certain types, certain elements of society might think so, but I've had therapies as well. I've had talking therapies, I've done tapping therapy, I've done a bit of EMDR as well. And it all helps, but then you just kind of...

Sadie Marshall (1:01:31)

No.

Yeah.

Julie Waite (1:01:36)

get stuck back in your daily life and you forget a bit that these things are out there. So yeah, that's a really good reminder. And before we finish, I know you mentioned breath work there is the second one. Is there a breath that, know, do you have like a go-to breath that if you think I just need to calm down and take a minute, what would you recommend and could you teach us something for people that maybe haven't done this before?

Sadie Marshall (1:01:44)

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, absolutely. So it is the most simplest breath of all. It is just a breath where we use our entire body, full body breathing, a full belly breath. So first of all, to get this breath, you wanna make sure that you're sitting up nice and tall. Yes. And you wanna make sure that your spine is like nice and long so that you can really expand into the whole body. Relax your shoulders down, closing down the eyes.

Julie Waite (1:02:12)

Mm-hmm.

I'm gonna join in because I feel like I need one. Right.

Mm-hmm.

Sadie Marshall (1:02:32)

And just relax the muscles in your face, know, soften your jawline, remove the tongue away from the roof of your mouth, relax your eyelids and your eyebrows. If your hands are gripping your knees or on your lap, just soften your hands.

and especially ladies, know, we all hug our belly in. So if you're sucking your belly in right now, just let your belly muscles relax. And then you want to imagine your torso is segmented into three parts. So you have the lower section, which is around the belly button and the diaphragm area. Then you have the middle section, which is where your lungs and your rib cage are. And then you have the upper section, which is your chest and your collarbones. And when you inhale,

you want to push your belly muscles out and you want to fill up that lower section first. So you want your belly button area and your diaphragm to expand. And then as you continue the inhale, you want to fill all the way up to the lungs and the rib cage. And then finalise the inhale all the way up to the collarbone. Even if you feel like you can't take any more in, just imagine you can take it in and then just briefly hold.

And then when you exhale, start to exhale from the collarbones out through the nose, then from the ribs, exhale all the way down to the belly button. We're gonna do two more of that. So inhale, push your belly muscles out, fill up the lower sections, fill up the middle section, fill up the upper section, briefly hold.

And then exhale, upper section. Exhale, middle section. Exhale, lower section. Really squeeze your navel back. Really empty out the exhale. One more time. Inhale, lower section. Expand the belly. Inhale, middle section. Expand the rib cage. Inhale, upper section. Expand the chest.

Exhale from the collarbones. Exhale, keep going down past the ribs and then finish the exhale by squeezing the navel back.

and then just let the breath go.

and come back and just, you know, three deep breaths. That's all it takes normally to just instantly change. How do you feel?

Julie Waite (1:05:12)

it's so much more relaxed. I'm just like, why don't I do this more often? You just forget, don't you? You need to just, yeah, it's a real practice of trying to build things into your life. Just trying to introduce, you know, maybe one thing at a time that you can, even just if you could introduce a breath a couple of times a day, would make a big difference. I'm sure it would.

Sadie Marshall (1:05:37)

Yeah,

it really would instantly, instant shift, know, an internal state and very quick.

Julie Waite (1:05:41)

Mmm, there you go.

Yeah. Well, that is brilliant. Thank you so much for sharing all that knowledge and practical ways that people can, work with fear and feel more in control. I think. Oh, you're very welcome. And I think.

Sadie Marshall (1:05:54)

Thank you so much for having me.

Julie Waite (1:05:59)

Just a final message for people is really just to remember that feeling fear is human, but it really doesn't have to be the thing that dominates your life. It's just about finding the right tools, finding the right support, and then you can feel a lot safer and more at ease with yourself. So if you found this episode helpful, please share it with someone that might benefit from it. We would love for you to follow and to leave a review because that helps more people find this content.

and until next time, stay safe.