The Thrive Programme Podcast

Why Social Anxiety Isn’t About Them - It’s About You

The Thrive Programme Podcast Season 1 Episode 25

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0:00 | 37:49

In this episode, Lucy is joined by Mícheál for an honest and empowering conversation about social anxiety - where it really comes from and how to overcome it.

Mícheál shares his personal experience of struggling with confidence in his 20s. At the time, he was putting huge pressure on himself to fit in, be liked, and measure up to everyone else. Social situations felt uncomfortable and draining, not because of what was actually happening, but because of what was happening in his head. He was constantly second-guessing himself, replaying conversations, and worrying about what other people thought of him.

Lucy and Mícheál explore how social anxiety is often rooted in fear of judgment, taking responsibility for other people’s feelings, and harsh self-criticism. But here’s the key insight: social anxiety isn’t something that just happens to you. It’s not coming from the room, the party, the meeting, or the people in it. And it’s rarely an accurate reflection of what others truly think.

It’s you thinking in ways that make yourself feel small / awkward / uncomfortable / judged.

This is great news! Because it means its totally within your power to change. 

In this episode, they discuss:

  • Why social anxiety feels so real - even when it’s thought-driven
  • The trap of living life through other people’s eyes
  • How rumination keeps social anxiety alive
  • The hidden pressure of trying to manage how others feel
  • Why building genuine self-esteem is the foundation of confidence
  • How taking responsibility for your thinking changes everything

Lucy describes the shift as moving from living your life according to what you think others think about you… to living according to what you think about you.

It’s about making decisions based on your values.
Liking what you like.
Backing yourself.
And letting other people be responsible for their own thoughts and feelings.

If you’ve ever walked away from a social situation replaying everything you said, worried you got it wrong, or feeling like you weren’t “enough,” this episode will help you see what’s really going on - and remind you that confidence is built from the inside out.