Laughs without Lager

The gift of celebrations alcohol free!

• Ali and Meg

Share episode

Send us a text

Remember when special occasions meant inevitable hangovers? When Mother's Day was just another excuse to pop champagne at breakfast and keep drinking until you crashed on the couch by dinner time? We've been there, and in this raw, honest conversation, we're pulling back the curtain on how celebrations transform when alcohol no longer takes center stage.

The "mummy wine culture" phenomenon continues to dominate greeting cards, gifts, and social expectations—teaching even young children that Mum's special day should revolve around alcohol. We share personal stories about how our alcohol-centered celebrations often ended in disappointment, relationship tension, and missed moments. One Mother's Day even ended a relationship when the realisation hit: "You give more shits about alcohol than me."

Fast forward to today, and our celebrations look radically different. Morning Pilates classes, horseshoe-finding walks with the dogs, thoughtful gifts that don't involve spirits, and genuine family time in the backyard. We dive into the practicalities of navigating alcohol-free options at social gatherings, the challenges of purchasing non-alcoholic alternatives (sometimes having to visit liquor stores—talk about irony!), and finding what works for your own sobriety journey without judgment.

Perhaps the most beautiful transformation isn't what we're doing differently—it's how we feel. Present. Connected. No more debates about who's driving home or expensive Uber rides. No more morning-after regrets. Just the pure freedom to fully experience life's special moments and create memories we'll actually remember.

Whether you're sober curious, newly alcohol-free, or years into your journey, this conversation offers both practical advice and the reassurance that celebrations without alcohol aren't just possible—they're infinitely more rewarding. Connect with us on Instagram or through the contact details in the show notes to share your own experiences or ask questions!

Contact Us:

https://www.meganwebb.com.au/podcast-1


Ali

insta: https://www.instagram.com/idontdrinkfullstop/


Meg

website: https://www.meganwebb.com.au/

insta: https://www.instagram.com/meganwebbcoaching/

bookclub: https://www.alcoholfreedom.com.au/unwinedbookclub

Connect AF: https://www.elizaparkinson.com/groupcoaching

Speaker 1:

Hey, ali. Happy Mother's Day, megsie. Same to you, love. So we're recording this on Mother's Day, but it will be being aired two weeks after and you might be listening to this at any time of year, so it's going to relate no matter what time of year, but we are going to start by talking about our Mother's Day. So how different, ali, does your Mother's Day now look like to how it used to?

Speaker 2:

Oh, good question, mate, because I probably would have been so. In Perth time it's, you know, 2 o'clock in the afternoon, I would be pretty much half cut, but depending on what was arranged but it would have almost always it was revolving around alcohol. So, whether it be breakfast, bubbles, wine time and then dinner, you know, finish it off with bourbon or vodka. Either way I would have been pissed by the end of today. How about you?

Speaker 1:

well, I, you know what I can't even. I'm trying to think. I think we used to mainly have like picnics and I would have wine there, uh, but I would, I'd be all right, I'd get home and then I'd just drink it up by myself at home. That was towards the end of my drinking career, is what the pattern looked like. Or, if we had something at home, it was just drinking on into the night. Or and I get confused which events this was. It could have been birthdays, whatever but I would also drink enough that by six I'd be sort of crashed on the lounge and saying to the kids just get leftovers from the day. Like, yeah, it was a write-off type. Yeah, yuck, I don't know, I don't really like even remembering it, I think.

Speaker 2:

Oh, I know, it's just so, it's just just what us Aussies, all you know, just celebrate it, you know, I mean I don't know. I went to the shops the other day and there was pyjamas with champagne, bottle corks, you know, champagne or red wine sort of on the pyjamas. The card section was just all aimed at mummy wine culture and it's really sad. I mean these little girls were standing there with their dad going oh, get mummy this one, she loves wine, or get mummy this one, she loves champagne. And you know, these are like little kids sort of thing and it's just like I mean, yeah, that was the easiest thing for my ex-husband to get me, although he actually Mother's Day was always a little bit fraught for me because years and years ago he said to me one time we were probably because we woke up and I was hungover or whatever.

Speaker 2:

But I remember I'll never forget he said to me I must have said something like I gave him a dig about oh, you know, it is Mother's Day. So I, you know, I think I asked him for a cup of tea and anyway, his comeback comment to me was, I think I said you know, it is Mother's Day after all, and he literally said to me you're not my mother, ouch and F you. But yeah, so it's sort of a little bit and in fact, you know, fast forward one of those. It might have even been that Mother's Day, I actually by the end of it, because we did have a picnic and he did take his you know esky full of beer and probably a bottle of champagne for me, but he literally just worried more about that effing esky than me and I got home that night and I went. You know what I'm fucking done, mate, you give more shits about alcohol than me.

Speaker 2:

So, yeah, we actually did break up and it was Mother's Day, I remember it. So, yeah, I guess I guess.

Speaker 1:

yeah, thinking about that well, that brings up a memory of a mother's day that I had and it was here and my ex there's a photo of him hung over sitting in a chair lying back, and I think he's with another male I can't remember which one in the family and mum and I were doing everything.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

It's Mother's Day and I remember looking back at the photos going oh, happy Mother's Day, everyone relax, who's male? And the women will do it. Yeah, but that was pretty, yeah, I know, pretty standard, yeah, standard. And like you said, gosh, you go to the shop, like I got my. I got a present for someone today my kid's grandma and I got a cute little bag and then I realised when I got home that it was like an ostrich dressed up. It was really cute, sounds silly, but she had champagne earrings. And I didn't realise. I know, right, we're swimming upstream, mate, totally. And it was really cute, sounds silly, but she had champagne earrings and I didn't realize.

Speaker 1:

I know right, we're swimming upstream mate totally and it was so unnecessary though you didn't need that in the picture. They were lovely colorful pictures with all different australian birds. So it wasn't an ostrich, it was an emu, um, but you didn't need the alcohol.

Speaker 2:

But that's what I'm gonna to the mums, and you're right mums, because look at the look at the end of the day, that's I mean, I don't know about you. That's why I drank as well, to relax, to reward, yeah. So you know, now I sit back and have a cup of tea for my reward, but back then I mean, it was just so ingrained and that's all I ever did. And it was, yeah, pop a shampoos and basically F you, you can cook dinner tonight because it's Mother's Day.

Speaker 2:

Every day should be Mother's Day, but it's, you know, it was a good excuse to basically get pissed all day, numb out and take no responsibilities and go, you can drive, I'm out, it's Mother's Day. So it worked for a little while. But when he said that comment, I was like, yeah, okay, yeah, who's doing? We got a problem. This guy, yeah. And that's when I kind of was joining the dots over the years which, um, you know, led me to finally finally kicking the the alcohol um habit and he's on to be like every other person in Australia that drinks heavily.

Speaker 1:

Definitely we're swimming upstream, but it's a trend that's growing, definitely growing, and we're not the only ones anymore, which is pretty cool. And so what would something like Mother's Day or not Mother's Day it doesn't have to be Mother's Day, a birthday or what would that look like now for you? Like spoiling yourself?

Speaker 2:

Well, I woke up this morning and I went for my. I had a little bit of a sleep in, so there's a spoiling, because my sleep ins used to be because I was hung over a ship right, so I would have got.

Speaker 2:

I certainly last night would have been drunk Because my sleep-ins used to be because I was hung over a ship, right, so I would have got. I would certainly last night would have been drunk because it is Mother's Day, so I knew that I could sleep in and potentially get eggs in, you know, breakfast in bed by the one child. But obviously now I'm not married and I don't, my kid doesn't live at home and I don't drink. Today I woke up and I slept in and then I took the dogs for a walk and I found another horseshoe. Hey, I just love the universe, so, yeah. So I was on the bridal path.

Speaker 2:

I live in the beautiful part of WA and, lo and behold, I'm looking around just thinking about our podcast today, and then I looked down. It was this shiny new-ish horseshoe. So no, mum, I'm not going to return it to the neighbour because she's like darling, are you returning all these horseshoes? I'm like that's not the point. No, so thanks, mum, and happy Mother's Day. But yeah, I put it in my pocket. I went yahoo. I came home, made my protein shake and some. Actually, we have been growing a heap of tomatoes, so I did it in my thermy, a tomato sauce, Delicious, so I've been busy. Lizzie, how about you?

Speaker 1:

Well, I had all my three kids slept in, so I went to Pilates, which is definitely self-care for me these days. I have been doing Pilates for about nine months and my joints, my knees, are so much better, like it's. Honestly, I feel like I would have liked to just get a whole new body from it, and that hasn't happened.

Speaker 2:

Yeah.

Speaker 1:

But it has helped with strength and pain and that is really what, that's what's important. So I went there and then and what time was?

Speaker 2:

that, Megs, it was 9 o'clock.

Speaker 1:

Oh, that's you know that's not too bad, it was reasonable. And then they gave us all the mums, got a rose, which was very cute. And then I thought I, oh, oh, yes. And then they gave us all the mums, got a rose, which was very cute. And then I thought I, oh, yes. And then I came home and brought some. I went online shopping and bought some skincare for myself. I thought why not? Yeah. But then my kids got up and my daughters are both adults now, so they had my daughter. Well, there was a theme my eldest works at their bath and table. So I went shopping there and got me pyjamas, dressing gown, cushions for the lounge.

Speaker 2:

It was really nice. Is that bedspread from there?

Speaker 1:

Yes, I have. Ali can see a bedspread in the background. Yes, it is because we get discounts.

Speaker 2:

Oh my God, we're going to have to chat off. You know Scamming Ali is going to come out now and be like can your daughter just like, do the staff discount and do some shopping myself? That's literally my favourite store, oh it's beautiful.

Speaker 1:

For those people who don't know, bed Bath Table it is gorgeous, and at Easter and Christmas they have beautiful decorations. And then they've just got beautiful homewares.

Speaker 2:

And I love that dressing gown. They did good.

Speaker 1:

So my dressing gown's blue with white daisies on it. It's so nice. Yes, my girls spoil me. My son he's only 16 and is a boy. Well, he wrote a nice message in a card. I was like amazing.

Speaker 2:

That's progress.

Speaker 1:

So that's, progress.

Speaker 2:

And's progress it is.

Speaker 1:

And some really stale cold toast, yeah grunt well, I didn't even get that, but that's all right, because I was at Pilates and that's fine. We end up we had the family over and sat in the backyard, so that was really nice. That's what I like.

Speaker 2:

No alcohol needed. I mean, do you actually drink alcohol-free drinks, Like, do you ever have any in the house like fake bubbles?

Speaker 1:

I don't keep it in the house and none of my family drink. In fact, at Christmas the teenagers like who were 18, 19, 20, 21, were like are we the only family in Australia that aren't on the alcohol at Christmas? It was hilarious because we just don't even think about it anymore and so, yeah, we've all kind of done the get rid of it and so it's just not a thing. But because the younger ones are just starting to, I mean, thankfully they're not really into alcohol that much. But it was quite funny because we don't even have it there. If we had friends coming I might, you know, get some to offer. But with the NA drinks, you know, I do have I don't know what brand, I'll have to find out but they're sugar-free. You can get like a gin and tonic. I like that really occasionally, just occasionally. And if I go out, I do love an NA beer. You give me a good NA beer and I am just so happy.

Speaker 2:

Okay, what's a good NA beer.

Speaker 1:

Heaps Normal.

Speaker 2:

Heaps Normal oh yeah, that's kind of the leading the gang, I think. Up in Karratha where I was living, the only NA beer was Heineken. Oh, okay, there's just something in that Didn't sit well. But I mean, when I started drinking, I mean back in the day, there wasn't, you know, vodka. I mean I didn't have the funds to buy that.

Speaker 2:

But Dad always said to me, don't drink spirits when you go out because people can drug you because it's in a cup, and of course he was a beer drinker. So I drank beer and beer and beer. So then I switched to you know the hard liquor because I mean there's nothing worse than drinking a carton and getting bloated. And then then you know it's kind of like burping and farting and it's like, oh god, so let's go the hard stuff and get the job done quicker, so anyway. So I don't really drink beer anyway, like, as you know, as a alcoholic drink. So it's kind of. Yeah, it was a bit hard to um. I do like a nice cold beer after the beach on a really, really hot day, but the heinekens was just not doing it for me, so I just um, I liked the gin and tonic. Uh, cans naked, I think it is in the supermarket yeah right, there's some good, there's some good ones.

Speaker 1:

I mean, I wasn't really a beer drinker, but I really love now a cold na beer. If I'm out, it's not often, probably three times a year, but like you said, like and now I wouldn't even dream of following it up with another one, whereas when you're after the hit, it was so bloating I just can't even believe how much people drink. Trying to get that hit, because now you only need one or two drinks through a night.

Speaker 2:

I went out last Saturday night, went dancing, sober dancing and I spent $6.50, which was my one and only lemon-lima bitters with soda, please, and lots of lime, and that's all I spent. You know, because again you don't want to, it's all sugary and stuff, but again it's not the point. But when I would go to people's houses I did like to, especially in the early days, everyone you need to have the plan of taking something to hold. And look, the NAB is perfect because you just hold it. You obviously just, you know, just hardly even finish it because it was, by the time it was warm and, you know, flat. But I just held on to it because people didn't ask you do you want a beer love?

Speaker 1:

Nah, thanks, mate, I've already got one Exactly and then they don't go. Why aren't you drinking? People don't even notice. The only other thing about that is that sometimes it can be a trigger to people. I probably wouldn't drink na red wine because I reckon I mean it probably would be gross, but it probably made me just want a real one. Um, the beer doesn't, because I wasn't really a beer drinker but I um, and it's also filling like. So it's kind of a good drink for me to have, or I have if I'm out, mocktails if I'm somewhere, and they're just delicious and they don't remind me of alcohol. But my neighbours are really into. They drink alcohol, but they're really into trying different NA drinks. So often they'll, if we have an event they'll say, oh, we've got an NA champagne, do you want to try it? And so they kind of supply me when I go to, because our neighbors get together a bit and I'll try something.

Speaker 1:

Usually I only just finish a glass, if that like you said I sit on it and it's nice to have something um, but I haven't yeah it's not something I um need to have a lot of definitely.

Speaker 2:

I don't know. Some days I get home from work and it's like I've got na bubbles. I won't call it champagne because it isn't. Um, let's be honest. And man, I would literally smash it like I would just drink the shit out of it, thinking, and I guess it did take me a while to well, when I first was doing it, I um was um. My daughter was like she'd try it and I had to look at the label because I thought, jesus, this tastes like the $5 crap from BWS that I used to drink and it cost more. It was like $11 for freaking non-alcoholic booze. It's like. That actually does irk me, I must say. It's like are you serious? It's not even.

Speaker 2:

And then it's gone back to the checkouts now where they have to come over and say you're over 18. Yeah, because again, this is, you know, the nanny states, the government. They don't want kids going to the supermarket and looking at buying fake gin, which is, again, it's like $36 for Gordon's 00 gin. So it just sits there and goes dusty. And then I bought it for $2. Oh yeah, fuck yeah. I bought the whole shelf. Mate Took me months to drink and I never even drank gin when I was drinking.

Speaker 2:

But I thought, fuck, $2, it's mine, but yeah, so now you have to show your not show ID. But she has to like swipe her card at the self-serve for fake booze from the shop, for fake booze from the shop. But yeah, I'm noticing that in the shops that alcohol-free is actually becoming very small, the variety. And now I'm like and I ask the people sometimes when I'm in a bit of a grumbles, I'll be like where's the rest of it? What's going on here? Is this all you know? Basically what we have to go to the bottle shop and they're, you know, they're like, look at me, like whatever, um, but it's a bit annoying because I don't, I'm not triggered, like I will never drink again yeah right.

Speaker 2:

And, however, if you have to go to dan murphy's to buy your freaking alcohol-free that lining up, yeah, you're kind of standing there going fucking hell.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, yeah. Well, you're in the shop with it just everywhere.

Speaker 2:

Yeah, so it's not great. So maybe I should write to Woolworths and Coles and say please explain.

Speaker 1:

Please explain. I haven't looked in Coles and that around here. I don't know what the stock's like if they've increased or decreased.

Speaker 2:

Well, I can tell you, in Perth, mate, it's decreasing rapidly. And I do like it because I do. I don't know, I do, I do. I'm not really a lemon. You know, I never drank Coke unless it had bourbon in it.

Speaker 1:

Yeah.

Speaker 2:

And I'm really naff at making like mocktails at home, so I sort of rely on just that brain dead, crack the can and drink it. Oh yeah, it tastes like gin and tonics. Yeah yeah, you sort of go off to the. Yeah, had a couple of those last night over the fire and then I went back onto the waters.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, I'm pretty happy with water, but I do have. I had a client who was like, oh, I'm worried. I went out and had like six NA beers in a row early days and I said don't worry about it, if that's what you need to do to not drink alcohol. It's just another type of soft drink and like, just don't worry about it. I mean, if that's what you can do, do it. Yeah, if it triggers you, don't do it.

Speaker 1:

You know, see what suits you is my suggestion if you go out, like in Sydney I don't know what it's like over in WA, but we do have a lot of options when whenever I've been out, they're just we've got a place locally called Seadrift Distillery and it's down near all the breweries and it's a gin distillery. There's no alcohol removed. It's actually made from sea kelp, no alcohol. I've been there for some events. It's just amazing. Actually, sarah Rusbach came and did an event there. It's getting really popular. So their gin is going into a lot of pubs in Sydney and really nice, like trendy pubs, and they're doing some really great mocktails and stuff.

Speaker 2:

Oh nice, because, yeah, I mean, look, I don't go out a lot, but Perth is, you know, it's sort of the Wild West. It's not like Sydney and literally most places it's like hi, what's your alcohol-free options? Soft drink and the. Heineken, and that's it.

Speaker 2:

I think there's another beer, but I'm like, really you don't have like little mini Prosecco that's alcohol free? I'd love that because that would just be like yes, so again, there needs to be a lot of work. But failing all that, just have a lemon, lime and bitters with soda and feel proud of yourself and just feel smug holding and grab your keys, and then we can drive home Ha.

Speaker 1:

Woo-hoo, nothing like driving home.

Speaker 2:

There's no rules about, oh my God, who's going to drive. I have to get an Uber, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Oh, and you can drive home and say I hope there's an RBT along the way. Yes, I want them to say when was your last drink? And I'll say three and a half years ago.

Speaker 2:

Boom, boom. Yeah, wouldn't that be great. Actually, I haven't been asked that, oh well, I keep not getting pulled over and I'm like come on, it's Murphy's Law, isn't it Murphy's Law?

Speaker 1:

Just pull us over.

Speaker 2:

So thanks Meg, so thanks meg. What a great show and it was. Yeah, I think we've given some food for thought about some options, about not just mother's day, even though we are two motherers, there's lots of, um, sober, curious men hopefully that are listening. But yeah, just any type of, uh, social gathering well, let's call it that way that we can can offer some tools, whether it's an NA option, you know, just self-care, like, yeah, go for a walk, buy a dressing gown, pat the dog. If they do anything, then drink.

Speaker 1:

If people want to reach out and ask us questions, we'd love to hear from you, and you can contact us through Instagram. You can send a DM, you can go to the show notes. You will find contact details for Ali and myself. So reach out, send us in some questions, let us know what you think. We'd love to hear from you. It's great to chat, ali, and we will be back in two weeks with another topic to discuss.

Speaker 2:

Good to see you. See you, Megsie.