Shine bright like a diamond

This episode explores the true nature of self-confidence—not as something you're born with, or something that comes from external success, but as a quality earned through adversity. The host reframes confidence as an inner warrior, forged in tough times, battle-tested through setbacks, and fueled by a deeper sense of purpose.

 Key Themes:

·       Self-confidence is built, not gifted: It comes from rising again after failure, not from easy wins. Scar by scar, decision by decision, we gather proof that we can count on ourselves.

·       The inner warrior: This warrior isn’t loud or perfect. It whispers “don’t give up” when things seem impossible. It fights not because life is easy, but because the journey is sacred.

·       False perceptions of confident people: We often assume confident people were always fearless or privileged—but many were shaped by hardship. Their calm exterior hides sleepless nights, quiet doubts, and repeated efforts.

·       Motivation and belief: The warrior within awakens when choice meets courage. It could be a moment of rock-bottom, the pursuit of meaning, or even someone else’s belief that sparks the fire.

·       Barriers to growth: Lack of confidence isn't laziness. It can stem from fear of judgment, past trauma, learned helplessness, or the pull of familiar pain.

·       The turning point: When someone finally takes action—with intention and purpose—they begin collecting real evidence that they’re capable. Over time, these actions reshape identity and self-trust.

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📧justyna.lyzwa@uracure.com

Transcript

Hello and welcome to episode 11 of my podcast UR a CURE- Inner Power. 

This episode is titled Shine bright like a diamond … and is about self-confidence. 

What is self-confidence? It’s trusting in yourself—believing that you can count on you. It’s having faith in the inner adult who lives inside, the one who shows up when life gets hard, who protects you, comforts you, and keeps you grounded.

It’s knowing you have the inner resources to get through challenges, to love safely, to share your life with someone without fear that they’ll take away your light—that precious spark within you.

Self-confidence is your armour. It guides you. It shields you. And it reminds you that you always have your own back.

This is the kind of warrior-like self-confidence I want to talk about today. The kind that never gives up. The kind that comes from truly knowing who you are—your worth, your resilience. But also staying humble, patient, and open. Knowing that sometimes you’ll need to trust in something bigger than yourself.

How do you become this person? We admire the brave ones—those who never give up, who fight for their truth, who say no when needed, who stand firm and speak up. But who are they really? How did they become so confident? Were they born that way?

Probably not.

Chances are, you think they’ve always been carefree, successful, fearless, self-assured. But the truth is, we often judge people without knowing their path—especially when we’re struggling to find our own peace.

I’ve been there. I’ve judged people—because there was something in them I didn’t have, but desperately wanted. I believed they had it easy, while I felt too shy, too awkward, too scared to fight for what truly mattered to me. I was too self-conscious, constantly doubting my worth.

But what if I told you that the most confident and successful people—and especially the ones who remain humble and respectful—are just like you and me? At least, they were at some point.

Sure, there are people who’ve had easier lives. Success, money, and privilege without struggle. They might seem confident. But not in the way I described at the beginning. They weren’t forged in the fire. They were never warriors. They never had to rise from the floor after being knocked down again and again. They don’t know what it means to ache for something so deeply it hurts, or to sit in darkness and still reach for the light. And because of that, they often can't truly appreciate what they have.

Real self-confidence? It rises from a place of “I don’t know.” “I don’t understand.” “I am afraid.” “I feel lost.”

That’s where the real battle begins.

A warrior finds a way to say: “I’m afraid… but I’ll do it anyway.” “I don’t know how… but I will try.” “I am exhausted and have no strength left… but I won’t rest until I honor the promise I made to myself.”

That is the kind of confidence that doesn't just shine—it glows from within. Because it was earned.

This is work, this is tough, this is war. What is it that they are fighting for? They want to prove themselves that they can trust themselves, that they have this light in them which needs to be always lit. They have a purpose, their aim is meaning. Meaning for life itself to be purposeful. Self-confidence is built through the hardship not through easy life. I’ve learned that myself on my skin. Looking back at my life I’ve been through tough, dark times, I was on the very bottom of how anyone could feel, still this light was in me, still this warrior in me was whispering… don’t give up, stand up, don’t you dare to even think of giving up. That’s how the self-confidence is built, not from praise or perfection, but from choosing not to break when it would have been easier to. Self-confidence is not something gifted, it’s forged one scar at a time. 

How to become self-confident? Find your light, your inner warrior that never gives up. He fights when it’s tough, goes through the miles because he believes that somewhere out there is peace and harmony but more importantly, because he knows that the journey itself is sacred. It is in those tough times, tough moments you are being forged, tested.  We need these difficult, challenging times to test our self-trust, courage. Out of that we built self-confidence. Self-confidence is built on the countless examples of how we managed in life. These people who we judge as carefree, successful and confident they probably proofed to themselves multiple times that they can do it despite of hardship, uncertainty.

We often see only the glow of their presence—the calm voice, looking relaxed but in control, the fearless steps—but not the battles that built them. What we don't always see are the sleepless nights filled with doubt, the moments of silence after a failure, or the quiet pep talks whispered into the mirror just to survive another day.

These people didn’t become confident overnight. They earned it.

• They faced storms and stayed standing.
• They showed up when it would’ve been easier to hide.
• They fell—hard—but got up, wiped the dust off, and dared to try again.

And through that repetition—through those hard-won victories against their own doubts—they built proof. Not for the world, but for themselves.

That’s why their confidence feels unshakable. Because it’s not a performance. It’s a memory. Of every time they didn’t give up.

So next time we feel small in their presence, maybe we shouldn’t compare— Maybe we should be inspired.

Because they didn’t start where they are now. And neither must we stay where we are.

The very important question comes to my mind now. What makes some people to fight, be better, find their own obstacles, limiting beliefs and work on them and some people want quick fixes, or they don’t even want that. No matter how hard they have in life, they don’t seem to be interested in improving their situation. What motivates us to be better, what wakes up this warrior in us? 

Some people rise because they’ve tasted victory before. Even a tiny one. They’ve felt the shift when they pushed through fear or pain, and now their brain remembers: “I can do hard things.” Others may never have had that moment—or they’ve been told their whole life they can’t. And so, they stop trying.

Growth is uncomfortable. But staying stuck? Sometimes that becomes unbearable. Some warriors wake up when they realize: “This isn’t living. This is surviving. And I want more than this.” For others, even that pain isn’t enough if they’ve lost hope that change will lead anywhere better. Sometimes, the pain is too much, and the change is an only option. We are very stubborn, I mean people are. When we are used to something, even if this is something toxic, unhealthy to us, we stick to it. Sometimes, the only option for us to improve, step on a different better path is to get hit by a proverbial hammer. 

This warrior can also wake up when people find something bigger than fear—something they’re willing to fight for (family, a dream, a truth about who they want to be). 

Sometimes we become brave not because we believed in ourselves, but because someone else did. A teacher, friend, parent, even a stranger who said, “I see more in you.” That spark? It can start a fire that transforms everything. 

People who have their warrior dormant are not lazy, they don’t lack willpower. Sometimes, it’s:

• Deep fear of failure or being judged

For example: A student who dreams of becoming a writer but never submits their work because they're terrified someone will laugh at them or say they’re not good enough.

• Trauma that taught them to not expect good things

For example A person who grew up in an unstable home where every moment of joy was quickly shattered—they now sabotage their own happiness because they’ve been conditioned not to trust it.

• Learned helplessness: when effort never seemed to work in the past

For example Someone who’s tried to improve their finances again and again—budgeting, applying for jobs, taking courses—but nothing ever panned out. Eventually, they stop trying because they believe nothing, they do will change their life.

• Comfort in the familiar, even when it’s painful

A person who stays in a toxic relationship not because they don’t want better, but because the pain has become predictable—and the thought of the unknown is even scarier than staying stuck.

Each of these scenarios holds a story waiting to be rewritten. The warrior inside? It might be quiet now, but it’s never gone. It just needs time, safety… and sometimes a single moment of belief to rise again.

We all carry wounds. But not everyone has been taught that they can heal themselves. 

In the end, the warrior awakens when choice meets courage. You need a clear decision—and a strong intention—to change something.

When you begin improving your life, step by step, the image you hold of yourself begins to evolve. You start noticing: you’ve made this decision, accomplished that task—many choices that opened new scenarios, brought new opportunities. 

And as your actions stack up, so do your beliefs about yourself. You start to see: “I did that. Even when I was hurt. Even when I felt uncertain, small, or afraid—I still moved forward.”

Those actions become your proof. Proof that you can take care of yourself. That you are someone worth relying on. That you are, in every sense of the word, your own warrior.

This is how self-confidence is built—not through tips and tricks. Tips and tricks are like whispering affirmations in your head, saying "I am rich" while you’re drowning in debt and have just lost your job.

Your subconscious mind isn’t fooled by words alone. It craves tangible proof—evidence, again and again—that you can rely on yourself. That you’ve survived. That you’ve grown. Only then does belief start to take root.

That’s why actions are essential. Actions taken when motivation strikes, yes—but more importantly, actions backed by a clear decision to change and fueled by your intention: your why.

Because when you know why you want to grow, you'll keep moving even when it’s hard. You’ll start stacking small wins—proof points—until your mind no longer doubts the story you’re telling it. Until your self-confidence is no longer borrowed from external validation but built from your own lived experience.

If you feel that you need someone to help you with building your self-confidence, I will be more than happy to discuss it with you over a call. You can set up a 30-minute free consultation through my website www.uracure.com with me to get to know each other and to see if coaching is the right option for you. Feel free to check out my website 

If you’d like to support my podcast, there’s a link in the description of today’s episode you can use. I’m also open to collaborations—if you have any questions at all, feel free to email me. I promise I’ll write back!

As always I wish you all the best, stay tuned for the next episode.