Let’s Get Real with Jena Burris
Welcome to Let’s Get Real, the podcast for women who feel like they’re holding it all together on the outside… but falling apart on the inside.
If you’re exhausted from pretending, overwhelmed by the pressure to be everything for everyone, or unsure who you even are anymore—you’re not alone. And you’re not crazy.
Let’s Get Real is where we have honest conversations about the struggles most people avoid—healing emotional wounds, losing yourself in motherhood, rebuilding your identity, and learning how to live whole again.
I’m Jena Burris—wife, mom, and your host. With a background in marriage and family therapy, life coaching, and years spent navigating life behind the scenes of the NFL and Hollywood, I’m passionate about creating a space where real conversations lead to real healing.
Each week, you’ll hear real stories, practical tools, and the reminder that freedom is closer than you think. Because I believe that in order to heal, we have to get real.
New episodes every Tuesday. Real talk. Real tools. Real healing.
For speaking inquiries, brand partnerships, or workshop opportunities, visit www.jenaburris.com or email jena@jenaburris.com.
Let’s Get Real with Jena Burris
The Cost of Teaching Our Boys to Hide Their Feelings (Part 1) with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst
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Episode 25: The Cost of Teaching Our Boys to Hide Their Feelings (Part 1) with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst
Motherhood is full of contradictions—joy and exhaustion, pride and fear, laughter and tears. But there’s one contradiction that so many of us bump into when raising boys:
👉 We want our sons to be strong and tender.
👉 We want them to succeed and stay connected.
👉 We want them to know how to fight for what matters—but also how to love deeply.
And yet, from the time they’re toddlers, boys are often told: “Don’t cry. Toughen up. Be a man.”
What does that do to a child’s heart? What happens when boys learn early on that emotions are not welcome—that their sadness, fear, or even silliness is too much?
That’s what today’s guest, Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst, has been studying and working with for nearly 50 years. She’s a psychologist, author, and expert in attachment and emotion-focused therapy, and her stories will stop you in your tracks.
She told me about a 3-year-old boy who once explained his sadness like this:
“My tears go into my mouth, down into my belly, and turn into rocks. Then they come back out, and I throw them all around the room.”
💔 If that doesn’t paint the picture of swallowed pain turning into anger, I don’t know what does.
In This Episode, You’ll Hear Us Talk About:
🌿 Why boys are actually born with more emotional range than girls—and how culture unintentionally trains them to shut it down.
🌿 The subtle ways parents (especially moms) signal what emotions are “acceptable” and which ones aren’t.
🌿 How swallowed emotions don’t stay buried—eventually they resurface as anger, detachment, or even destructive behavior.
Why This Conversation Matters
We say we want husbands who are emotionally available, dads who are tender with their kids, and sons who know how to use their voices. But if they’re never given permission to feel, how can they possibly grow into that?
This episode isn’t just about raising boys. It’s about breaking cycles. It’s about healing ourselves as parents so we can model what healthy emotional expression looks like. Because our kids don’t just need lectures—they need examples.
It reminded me that so much of this starts with us as parents—our own regulation, our own willingness to sit with big emotions instead of rushing to silence them.
And it gave me hope, too. Because if emotions can be learned, they can also be relearned. We can choose a different path—for our kids and for ourselves.
If this episode speaks to you, please share it with a friend who’s raising boys. Let’s change the story together—one conversation at a time.
Connect with Gloria:
Facebook: https://facebook.com/gloria.vanderhorst.
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gloria-vanderhorst-ph-d-730826b/
P.S. If this episode resonates with you, please reach out. I truly want to hear your story. You can DM me on Instagram @jenaburris or email me at jena@jenaburris.com. Your voice matters — and I’m here for you.