Let’s Get Real with Jena Burris

The Cost of Teaching Our Boys to Hide Their Feelings (Part 2) with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst

Jena Burris Episode 26

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Episode 26: The Cost of Teaching Our Boys to Hide Their Feelings (Part 2) with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst

Marriage falling apart. Work crises piling up. Friendships that feel shallow or nonexistent.

These are often the moments that push men into therapy. Not because they’ve been taught to seek help for their inner world, but because the outer one has finally crumbled.

That’s where Part 2 of my conversation with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst begins.

In Part 1, we uncovered how boys are trained from toddlerhood to shut down their emotions. In Part 2, we talk about what happens when those boys grow up—how swallowed feelings resurface in adulthood, and how healing is possible even after decades of silence.

Inside This Episode, You’ll Hear Us Talk About:
 🌿 Why men usually only seek therapy in the middle of a crisis—marriage or career falling apart.
 🌿 The subtle ways culture trains boys to disconnect from their emotional needs.
 🌿 How buried emotions don’t disappear—they resurface in anger, isolation, or unhealthy coping.
 🌿 Why many women feel unsure of how to respond when their husbands do begin to share their emotions.
🌿 Practical tools for couples learning how to build safe emotional connection—together.

💔 One of the most powerful things Gloria shared was how women sometimes say they want emotionally open husbands—but when faced with their partner’s vulnerability, they feel unsafe, confused, or overwhelmed. And without meaning to, they shut it down.

That hit me hard. Because it’s not just about our sons. It’s about our marriages, our friendships, our own healing.

Why This Conversation Matters
 We cannot expect men to suddenly become tender, emotionally available husbands or fathers if we’ve spent decades training them to suppress what they feel. Healing takes work—for them, and for us too.

Gloria reminds us: feelings are not a threat. They are an invitation. An invitation to grow, to connect, and to truly see one another.

As a mom, this conversation hit me hard. I found myself reflecting on the subtle ways I’ve sometimes tried to “manage” or minimize my son’s emotions when they felt overwhelming to me. But I also walked away with hope: that with awareness, intention, and courage, we can create a different path. One where boys grow up whole, and men know how to love and be loved without shame.

She reminds us of something we desperately need to hear: feelings are not threats. They are opportunities. Opportunities to connect, to grow, to be curious, to truly know one another.

If you’re raising sons, married to a man who struggles to open up, or simply curious about how to break this cycle for the next generation, this episode is for you.

🎧 Listen to Episode 26 – The Cost of Teaching Our Boys to Hide Their Feelings (Part 2) with Dr. Gloria Vanderhorst

Let’s keep rewriting the story—one boy, one man, one family at a time.

Connect with Gloria:

Facebook: https://facebook.com/gloria.vanderhorst.7

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gloria-vanderhorst-ph-d-730826b/

P.S. If this episode resonates with you, please reach out. I truly want to hear your story. You can DM me on Instagram @jenaburris or email me at jena@jenaburris.com