From Cigars to Self-Discovery: Inside Frank Bellavia's World

In this compelling episode, we dive deep into the life of Frank Bellavia, founder of Fido Cigar Company. Born in New York and raised in California, Frank moved to Arizona with his wife to bring a long-held dream to life after spending over 20 years in the cigar industry. We explore Frank's journey through personal and professional highs and lows, including his experience with ADHD, his military school days, his various career shifts, and the foundational support of his wife. Frank shares his insights on building a business, the importance of legacy, and the philosophy behind his company. Through candid conversations and reflections, this episode offers a raw and inspiring look at resilience, passion, and commitment.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:23

Fail means first attempt. And it doesn't make you a bad person. It doesn't make you a bad person. What makes you weak as a person? Stop trying.

SPEAKER_01 0:35

Hey there, welcome back to Above and Beyond where Excellence Meets Elevation. I'm your host, Jan Simon. This season we're raising the bar, diving into the passion, purpose, and the finding moments of leaders who don't just aim high, they live there. Big ideas, real stories. Let's get into it. Born in New York and raised in California, he moved to Arizona with his wife in 2017 to bring a long-held dream to life. With over 20 years in the cigar industry, spanning retail, distribution, brokering, and ownership, the founder of Figuardo Cigar Company, as a reflection of his passion for the craft and the community it creates. He loves educating and connecting with cigar smokers of all experience levels, believing the Leaf has a way of bringing people together outside of work. He's a devoted husband, proud dog dad of four pit bulls, and when he gets a break, you'll find him on the golf course or off on an adventure with his wife. Welcome to the podcast, Frank Bellavilla.

SPEAKER_00 1:30

Thank you. Thank you for having me.

SPEAKER_01 1:31

You're welcome. Thank you. So, okay, so figureado. Rado. Frado. Okay. Because I was saying figurado.

SPEAKER_00 1:39

Everybody says it by Ferado. Right. It's because there's there's a Spanish R in there. Right. Dorrado.

SPEAKER_01 1:45

Dorado. Figurado. Most most of us can't roll the R. Frado. Get my tongue stuck in my mouth.

SPEAKER_00 1:50

Figurado is actually the shape of a cigar. Seriously? Yeah. So you know the acne baby or the cartoon in Who Framed Roger Rabbit?

SPEAKER_02 2:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:01

The baby that walked around with a cigar.

SPEAKER_01 2:02

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:03

How it's short, fat, and then short, and it's like a torpedo tip.

SPEAKER_01 2:06

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 2:07

That's a figurado.

SPEAKER_01 2:08

No kidding.

SPEAKER_00 2:09

Yeah. Okay. You mentioned my dogs.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 2:12

Well, all of my dogs, there's a cigar theme in all of our animals.

SPEAKER_01 2:16

They have names? They do cigar names.

SPEAKER_00 2:18

Yes. So we have four pit bulls. Okay. Rado is the oldest. Okay. We call him Fig. They're all rescues. Okay. And he's 11. And then the girl boys are sizes of cigars, and the girls are growing regions. So my second child is Havana. Okay. She's brown, loud, obnoxious, a diva, just like every Cuban woman I've ever met. And then That's awesome. Mina is short for Dominicana.

SPEAKER_01 2:48

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 2:49

And she's a full pit, big fat black ass. Nice. And she's just wants to be loved when she wants to be loved. She's the biggest cuddler, biggest love bug. But when she wants attention, she wants attention. And when she wants to be left alone, she wants to be left alone. Just like every Dominican woman I believe. And then our youngest is our most recent, and he is a foster phale. So the ages are 11, 10, 9, and 1. Wow. And he's a full blue-nosed pit bull that some guy had since he was eight weeks. And at eight months he was going to take him to the shelter because he didn't know how to control a pit bull. And he's got kids. Worst time to get a dog. Yeah. When you have a three-year-old, a two-year-old, and a baby on the way.

SPEAKER_02 3:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 3:33

So now you're going to have four toddlers in the house.

SPEAKER_01 3:36

So and and one that might rip your face off if you let it.

SPEAKER_00 3:39

Correct. And if you don't train it properly.

SPEAKER_01 3:42

Right. If you don't know how to deal with it.

SPEAKER_00 3:43

Right. And so we picked him up and we were going to foster. And the person who adopted our last foster, when she saw him, she goes, Oh, I'm in love. We we need another dog. And we're like, you can have him. And some things happened in their family, and she was going to pick him up the second time for a permanent stay. And two days before, she's like, We had some family issues, some health issues. My father's moving in with us.

SPEAKER_05 4:12

We can't have the dog.

SPEAKER_00 4:13

Oh wow. And my wife and I looked at each other and go, Well, he's not going anywhere else. Yeah. And so now his name is Robusto.

SPEAKER_02 4:20

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:20

And he's a one-year-old pitbull, and he's got the biggest, fattest bottom lip. And he just looks at you like, I dad.

SPEAKER_01 4:28

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 4:29

And he's like the cutest dog, but he is a freaking toddler. That's awesome. Runs around, runs around, and then goes to sleep.

SPEAKER_01 4:35

So are you into uh pitbulls and pro lease?

SPEAKER_00 4:38

I do. I actually know him.

SPEAKER_01 4:39

Oh, you do?

SPEAKER_00 4:40

Yeah. And I also, through the cigar industry, know Shorty. Okay. And I've hung out with a bunch of his dogs and stuff. He's a big cigar guy, actually, down in San Diego.

SPEAKER_01 4:49

Oh, wow. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 4:50

So a couple times.

SPEAKER_01 4:52

Very cool. So let's uh let's jump back, jump in. Tell me, where did you grow up? New York. Oh. California. New York born, California raised. Okay. You don't sound like a New Yorker.

SPEAKER_00 5:03

Because I moved when I was three.

SPEAKER_01 5:05

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:05

So my whole family is from upstate New York. Okay. Rochester. Well, my dad is in the computer industry. So he's worked for like Texas Instruments, IBM, big companies like that. HP. Well, we lived in Poughkeepsie, and that's where I was born.

SPEAKER_02 5:22

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:23

And then he got a job in Southern California. So we moved when I was three to Westlake Village, Thousand Oaks.

SPEAKER_02 5:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:31

And then in 89, we moved up to the Bay Area after the earthquake.

SPEAKER_02 5:35

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:36

And then I went to a military high school in San Diego, which we'll get to.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

I would say, is this is that a story we need to approach?

SPEAKER_00 5:45

Kind of.

SPEAKER_01 5:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 5:46

My dad went to West Point. Okay. He was class of 68 or 69. And I wanted to go to West Point. Okay. And so I went to a four-year military high school in San Diego. Not because I was a bad kid.

SPEAKER_01 5:58

Okay. So it wasn't like a forced placed No. You need to go learn some lessons. Right. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 6:04

It was because my ADHD got way out of whacked. I'm diagnosed ADHD when I was eight. Okay. Before it was cool. Yeah. Like, I actually how I remember the diagnosis as we're jumping all over the place. I was at uh a therapist's office, and the therapist was talking to my mother because I was a wild child. I was a very misunderstood child because I saw things differently.

SPEAKER_02 6:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 6:31

And it was this other therapist that specialized in ADHD children, came out, saw what I was doing, and then talked to my mom. And I was, they had these like vases with these bamboo sticks, and I was playing with them, but I was organizing them.

SPEAKER_01 6:51

Oh, interesting.

SPEAKER_00 6:52

Like the vases were a certain height, and there was a certain amount of sticks. And so the smallest one needed to have two, and then this one had to have three, and this one had to have four. And then I would go over and play with the sandbox, and then I would come back, and he watched me and he's like, I think your son has ADHD. And he tested me. And what's funny is people with ADHD actually have some of the highest IQs.

SPEAKER_02 7:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:16

So take Albert Einstein, for example. He was ADHD. Thomas Edison was, but their IQs were off the charts. Thomas Edison and Albert Einstein, Albert Einstein specifically, wore the exact same clothes every day.

SPEAKER_02 7:30

Really?

SPEAKER_00 7:31

Same set. So he didn't have to worry about one less thing to what to wear.

SPEAKER_02 7:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:36

Yeah. So all the pictures you're gonna see him in his sweater. Same thing. So I got diagnosed when I was eight, and then puberty hits and high school hits. And my public school, I went to a private Catholic school up until junior high.

SPEAKER_02 7:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 7:52

And then now it's freedom, you know, but like you have to be fully self-sufficient.

SPEAKER_02 7:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 7:58

And I would come home and I would watch TV, I wouldn't do my homework. Not because I was dumb and not because I didn't understand what was going on. It's because I wasn't being challenged. Yeah. So my first freshman year. Your first freshman year? Yep. I was on a five-year plan. Okay. I actually got kicked out of an English class and a Spanish class. Because I would just go to class, drop my backpack off, and then go wander around campus. But when it came time for the tests, I would pass the tests with hundreds.

SPEAKER_02 8:28

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_00 8:29

And my teacher was like, How are you doing this? Are you cheating? And I was like, no, I read the book. She's all When? I was like, first day you gave it to me? I blasted through it in three days. So Catcher in the Rye, for example. We all remember reading that. So Catcher in the Rye, you read chapters one through two, and it takes you about two weeks. Yeah. And then you take a test. Well, I would finish the book in four days. So I was bored for two months. Yeah. So Spanish, I just didn't grasp it, which is funny as being in the cigar business now. I speak more Spanish than I did. Oh really? Oh yeah. My accent, even when I talk to people in the cigar business, they're like, Are you are you? Do you understand what I'm saying when we're talking bad behind your back? I'm like, no, I just know how to say La Mesa stuff. And so I went to a four-year military high school, and so I was given the opportunity to go to Army Navy Academy in Carlsbad.

SPEAKER_02 9:21

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 9:22

And they didn't really want to accept me as an incoming sophomore. And so they're hesitant. And so they presented the option for me to repeat freshman year. And I was like, all right, no big deal. Like it just means I'm gonna be 18 as a junior. Right. Cool, we'll go to Mexico, which we did. And so I went from a 0.66 GPA, my first freshman year, to a 3.86. Wow. And then my senior year, my cumulative GPA was like a 3.27.

SPEAKER_02 9:52

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 9:52

And I was an honors English, I was in AP bio, failed chemistry flawlessly because I can't do math very well. Hence why I'm in the cigar business.

SPEAKER_02 10:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 10:02

And then I left military school. I actually was kicked out my senior year and went to work. So I actually got my PhD from the school of Hard Knocks.

SPEAKER_02 10:13

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 10:14

So back in my twenties and 18, I started bar backing when I was 20. Okay. And then I got into the nightclub business in San Francisco. So I started off at 18 as the guy putting flyers on your cars. And then by the time I got out of the nightclub business, I was the assistant general manager of a 13,000 square foot nightclub.

SPEAKER_01 10:32

Wow. Yeah. So you didn't coming out of high school, I mean, obviously getting kicked out as a senior and whatnot, you didn't at that point think, well, then I'll just enlist and go into the military.

SPEAKER_00 10:43

Correct. I never wanted to enlist into the military. I wanted to go the off officer route, just like my father. But I actually started my appointmentship to West Point my junior year. So I started writing letters to congressmen to get them to meet with me because you have to get an appointment ship. And my SAT scores and my PSATs were really good. Even enlistment officers were talking to me that I would have tested very, very high on the ASVAP test. But I didn't want to enlist.

SPEAKER_01 11:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 11:40

Yeah. I wanted to go the officer route.

SPEAKER_01 11:42

Okay. Just like my dad. And then you didn't go to college? Correct. Okay, so you just started working.

SPEAKER_00 11:47

Yeah. So how I got started with nobody gets out of college or has this epiphany, oh, I'm gonna get into the cigar business. You're either born into it because your dad was in it, your grandfather was in it, or you fell in love at a certain age with cigars, and that's how you end up getting into it. So for me, I got out of high school and I went to work at 24 Hour Fitness and I was a gym membership counselor. And then I left there because a person came in and bought a $2,000 membership and he canceled it three days later. But he gave me his business card and he's like, You are too good to work here. Come work for me. And so I started working in a company called Beneficial Finance or Household Finance.

SPEAKER_02 12:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 12:32

I don't think they're around anymore, but they used to be the people that would like send you a check in the mail and you deposit it, and now you have a loan. Oh, gotcha. So that's why you see all these checks, not a real check.

SPEAKER_02 12:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:43

Well, I would call you and then upgrade you to a bigger loan amount at a longer term. And so that's how I got into mortgages. And I didn't like their business practices, so I left. But how I left was another client came in for a loan. He had some hardships, and he's like, You need to talk to my friend. You're too good to work here. And I ended up interviewing at Bank of America Mortgage.

SPEAKER_02 13:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 13:12

And within five minutes of my interview, my boss says, You know you got the job, right? I was like, Uh, huh? And he's all it's a three-day weekend. It's Friday night at 6 30. I'm usually out of here by four, and I'm meeting with you because you were so persistent to make this interview happen. I need you on my team.

SPEAKER_02 13:31

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 13:31

I was like, oh, okay. So I was a Bank of America Mortgage for several years, almost three, and I actually became the manager of a Fremont ranch in the Bay Area. And also I was the construction loan specialist for the whole Bay Area. So I was the only person that knew how to run the construction loan program.

SPEAKER_02 13:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 13:52

So I did that, and then the market shifted in about 2005 to the stated incomes, the oh, you got a 680 FICO, just tell me how much money you make and we'll get you a house before the bubble popped. Yeah. So I went to a broker and I got my real estate license. I did that for a little while, and then uh the bubble started popping. I just wasn't into it anymore. And I went into the nightclub business sometime. So I ran nightclubs in the Bay Area, and then I didn't like the people I was hanging out with. Yeah. It got to me. What I know now in business, had I known then, I would have been a millionaire by now. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, because I was getting paid like $200 a week, unlimited booze, unlimited guest list. Like I was the king, but I was young. So I was surrounded by a bunch of superficial people.

SPEAKER_02 14:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:43

But how I look at business now and the lessons I got over the years, I would be like, okay, don't pay me anything. I want 2% of the bar and I want 5% of the door. And we were raking money in. So I would have been making thousands a week.

SPEAKER_02 14:59

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 14:59

And then I would have piled it over, piled it over, and I probably would have opened my own bar a while ago. So after the nightclub business, I got into the alcohol business. I started working for Young's Market, Southern Wine and Spirits in the Bay Area, Jack Daniels, Bacardi, and I was a merchandiser, so I went to the grocery stores. But during that time, I fell in love with cigars. And how I fell in love with cigars was actually through my father. So my first cigar was I was 18. My dad used to smoke Cubans with his buddies that were the, you know, back in the 90s, it was the big rage. Well, he got into it during that time. Okay. But he traveled to Singapore a lot for the computer industry. So he would bring back real Cubans. So my first cigar, I was a cigarette smoker since I was 14.

SPEAKER_02 15:44

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_00 15:45

And uh I quit when I was 27 finally. But my first cigar, I was on my 18th birthday with my dad in our backyard. And I threw up everywhere. Oh, really? Oh, I got so, so sick. But my dad joined a fraternal men's organization in the Bay Area called MDI, Men's Division International.

SPEAKER_02 16:03

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 16:04

And it's this really powerful immersion weekend for men that is uh confidential, so we can't talk about what happens in the weekend, but you can talk about what you got out of the weekend. Gotcha. And in the men's weekend, it's really, really powerful to pay attention and to know your legacy of who you are and where you come from. But I got a very clear understanding in that weekend of my responsibilities as a husband and in a long-term committed relationship, of the proper ways that we've evolved as men in our DNA. And a very clear understanding of my role as a son to my father, and a very clear understanding of my role with money, and a very clear understanding of how to have trusting, intimate masculine relationships with other men, where we can drop our mask and we can be completely vulnerable with each other and talk about our real feelings because society has made it not okay for men to be men. They've sensitized us and we it's frowned upon for a man to be angry, but not really, if it's done in the correct way, and but it's also because of toxic masculinity of the other spectrum of it, you're weak if you cry.

SPEAKER_02 17:25

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 17:26

You know, you're too sensitive. Oh, you're a girl. No, but men's anger and women's anger are two different things. And so I did my men's weekend in 2001. I actually did my young men's ultimate weekend in 2020. So this men's weekend's been out for decades. And my dad did his. Well, the men that have done the weekend, there was something that was missing in that why do we have to be 21 to do this weekend? So they created the young men's ultimate weekend for boys between the ages of 13 and 20. And I did the very first young men's ultimate weekend because I was around these men since I was 18 when my dad got into the weekend. And so I did the young men's ultimate weekend, then I did the men's weekend, and then left the division because I wanted to be a jerk, you know, be a lone wolf, and then I came back. And during that time, we created another weekend that is not confidential, but it's based on the philosophy of Carl Jung, the King, lover, warrior, and magician.

SPEAKER_02 18:27

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 18:27

The masculine archetypes and the immature archetypes. So opposite the king is the spoiled brat. Opposite the warrior is like the Native American brave or the great samurai is the bully. Opposite the magician is the trickster. Opposite the lover is the slacker. So this Legacy Discovery Weekend, I did mine in 2008 in October. And then I became the production manager for the next six weekends.

SPEAKER_02 18:52

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_00 18:53

So I was in charge of 300 men. Like it was really, really powerful.

SPEAKER_02 18:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 18:58

So my dad being part of this organization and the computer stuff, he got into cigars. And so I smoked my cigar at 18, didn't like it. And then being involved with these men and quitting smoking when I was 27, I was like, okay, cool. I'm not, I'm, I'm done with everything. Uh maybe I'll have a cigar once a month with all the men. And I was like, I kind of like the camaraderie and the what I call the balance when you all smoke. You know, I'm sitting there smoking across from a 70-year-old man who's had these major experiences in life, and I'm 20 in my mid-20s, and we're smoking and we're equals, but we're not.

SPEAKER_02 19:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 19:43

So cigars are the great equalizer. And so I started smoking with the men's organization. I was like, I'll smoke once a month, I'll smoke once a week with my meetings. I'll smoke once a day because I like it. And then all bets were off. And then I ended up finding the cigar shop in San Jose, California called West Coast Cigars. Okay. Bill Davis is the owner. Great man. We're still friends to this day. And I was a regular. I just turned to him, sales guy. I'm gonna come work for you. Well, I don't need anybody. Well, sure. Always need to find a need. And my dad knew I was a salesman way back when I was like five, and not a marketing person. Because I went and sold sticks door to door that they chopped down a tree. And I sold one stick for a nickel, but I was trying to sell them for 25 cents. Oh yeah. And my dad's like, everybody has gas fireplaces. I was like, Well, they have to go camping. He's like, from that day forward, I knew my son was gonna be a salesman because he always found a need for his product. Yeah. But a marketing person would never drop their price. Yeah. So I told the bot the my buddy Bill, well, you need somebody in case somebody gets sick or somebody goes on vacation, you don't want to fill in. He's like, okay, be here Saturday. And then three and a half years later, I was his assistant manager to both stores. Wow. And loved cigars. It was like my jam. And like how I educated myself on it was he would walk me in the humidor every single week, and he'd like smoke this, this, this. And then the next week, what'd you think? Smoke this, this, this. And then eventually, after like a month or two, I was like, What haven't you smoked? I haven't smoked this, I haven't smoked this. He's like, Okay, go. I want you to do this now. What haven't you smoked in our humidor? And I want you to report back to me. And eventually I ended up smoking everything in the humidor, and I found where my palette sits. And so Bill gave me the start in the cigar business. Okay. And we're still really close friends. So if anybody wants to pull up West Coast cigars online and scroll through their images, it's changed hands now and their logo's changed. But if you look at their original logo, it's identical to mine. Oh, really?

unknown 21:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 21:49

Down to the color, down to the font, down to everything. And when I sent it to Bill, he's like, I'm honored. And my logo is the way it is to pay homage to where I came from. Yeah. So it's another form of legacy for me. Okay. That's really important. So after that, I saw all these sales guys coming in, just sitting around smoking cigars and getting paid and taking orders. I was like, I can do your job. I can sell cigars like that. And so I, once again, a sales guy, bugged this broker. Dude, get me an interview. I'll get myself the job. Just get me an interview. Who's hiring? Who's hiring? And he turns to me and I send him my resume every month for like six months. And he's like, Bro, I don't think you understand how a broker works. If I interview with a company and they don't hire me, I'm not gonna refer them to you so that you can be my competitor. I was like, makes sense. You're right. He's like, I have this distribution company. He's small, he runs everything out of his house and his barn and his corporate office. But if you go work for him, you'll sell more of my product. And And then I'll make more. I'll put the two of you together. So he put me together with my old business partner, and I grew the company from $86,000 a year to $1.2 million in five years. Wow. We ran out of our supply line. We were running out of stocks. We were a little bit in debt. And my dad even tried to come in and buy the company because he saw how much we were growing. Yeah. We actually applied to some venture capitalists because of his computer. And they said, Your business plan is so dialed in that you know your numbers, you know your competitive landscape so much better than people who are asking for $10 million. Yours is four pages and a PowerPoint presentation. $500,000 is too small. Do you want $2 million? We'll give it to you. Oh wow. It's like, uh, we wouldn't know what to do with two million. Hindsight, we should have taken it. Um, but that got me into distribution. And then from there, we were going under. I was like, okay, I'll go get a regular job and get out of the cigar business. And I just didn't let me see. So I put a Facebook post up. Who's looking for representation? I'm looking to become possibly a broker. In 36 hours, I had nine brands. Wow. And I was like, well, I guess that's going down that way. So I did that for five and a half years. I took over the Arizona territory in September of 2016. I got two hours across the border, and my wife and I were living in the bay, and I had an apartment in LA. So we were gonna move to LA and combine the two rents to find something. That way when I go to the bay, I can stay with my parents or my family.

SPEAKER_02 24:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:31

And I got two hours across the border and I called her. I said, What do you think about Arizona? She's like, Well, I used to live in Prescott. It's like this gorgeous. I don't remember it being this gorgeous because my uncle's in Tucson. Okay. So I came out here when I was like 12. Yeah. And Tucson's leaves a great impression on anybody. Yeah. It's Tucson. Uh, I think that's why since I've lived here since 2017, I've seen my uncle in Tucson like four times.

SPEAKER_01 24:55

Yeah.

unknown 24:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:56

Not because I don't like my uncle. My uncle's.

SPEAKER_01 24:57

No, no, yeah. But it's Tucson.

SPEAKER_00 24:59

But it's Tucson, yeah. And uh so we moved in 2017 and bought a house and never looked back. It was the honestly the hardest decision we've ever had to make.

SPEAKER_02 25:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 25:12

To leave family, to leave our safety net, to move somewhere where we don't know anybody. And that's like the best part about my my wife, my girlfriend back then. We've been married for coming up on five years. Okay. But we've been together for 15.

SPEAKER_02 25:27

Oh wow. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 25:29

And my wife is my rat or die. Like it's you can't explain the dynamics in a marriage that just works. Yeah. Because we've had so many friends that have gotten together, had kids, gotten a divorce in the time that before we even got engaged. Something about my wife just works. And we fight, we bicker, but we communicate. But something deep down is that's my ride or die. That's my best friend, my biggest cheerleader. And like when I have an idea, she's like, go for it. But also at the same time, she's like, that's a dumb idea. Don't freaking do that. Yeah. And when I told her about Arizona, she's like, let's do it. And then again, when COVID hit, I didn't want to travel anymore. In 2019, I did 44,000 miles. I was gone 30 weeks out of the year. Wow. All windshield. All Arizona or nine states. Okay. I covered New Mexico west. Wow. All the way north. And when I had to start traveling again, because customers were complaining, and manufacturers were talking to me about it, and I was like, my numbers are up. Like from a COVID year, I grew 30%. And then from a COVID year, I'm up 10. They can place a big order and schedule an event if they want to see me. Yeah. Like, I don't need to travel around just be like, hey, how you doing? Do you need anything? Oh no, okay, cool. It's by. Yeah. I just wasted hours. So I turned to her and I said, I'm gonna open an online store and a monthly membership box. And the idea behind the membership box was to feature what we call in the cigar industry throwbacks or older cigars that new cigar smokers will not or have never heard of that have been out for 30 years. And because everybody's the latest and greatest, the latest and greatest. But so we would feature education. So during this time, when I told her what I wanted to do, my wife looks at me and says, Burn the boats. And I was like, Okay. So, like the Spanish, yeah, they would burn the boats. You either die or you succeed.

SPEAKER_02 27:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 27:46

And I'm going back. We're not going back. And so we've never given up on Figueroa Cigar Company. So both of us have day jobs. I work for Supreme Forklift and Equipment. I sell heavy machinery during the day, but I do Figueroa 24-7. And so this membership box had three curated cigars from a manufacturer. So light, medium, full. And so it would be able to teach you about your flavor palette of what you prefer. And had a tasting card in there. And it was great. We boomed in memberships. But then it just got really tough with manufacturers where when I would order, they would be out of stock and I would have to quickly change a manufacturer. And I was like, this isn't worth it. I'm over it. But during that time, somebody's like, Hey, can you do a golf tournament? I guess it's just a table and tablecloth and put some cigars out. Boom. Yeah. Off to the races after that. And then we just grew in mobile event after mobile event after mobile event. And now we're actually the largest mobile cigar event company in the state of Arizona. We do about 135 to 140 events a year. Wow. And then somebody approached us to open a brick and mortar inside of their bar and on the green sports bar, and I couldn't say no. Yeah. So now we have a brick and mortar. And that's kind of like how I got into the cigar business and what we're doing now and how we're growing. But like we do major events like Barrett Jackson, Cave Creek Bike Week, Good Guys Car Shows, and then golf tournaments, things like that.

SPEAKER_02 29:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:13

And it's fun. Excuse me.

SPEAKER_01 29:16

Along the way, you know, when you're when you're building, whether it's whether it's the business now or through the businesses that you had previously. Were there times where I mean it's it it sounds like when you finally stepped into the cigar business, you felt like, okay, this is home for me. Yeah. But were there were there times where you just you were done, you just like I just can't do this, or everything was ready to implode and you're ready to just walk away from it all?

SPEAKER_00 29:44

Last week. If you're not a business owner and you're not a builder, if you don't want to burn it down to the fucking ground at least once every six months and walk away. But I'm just reminded that I don't have a religion anymore. I was baptized Catholic.

SPEAKER_02 30:00

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 30:00

But I have faith. I walk with God every day, I talk to him all the time. But I'm just reminded that God doesn't put anything in front of you that he knows you can't handle. And he doesn't put the toughest battles in front of his weakest soldiers. Yeah. And so I just have to remember that and just know that when I'm feeling weak, my wife picks me up.

SPEAKER_02 30:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:22

And when I talk to her and I communicate, like, I just want to burn it down. And she goes, No, it's me and you versus the world, babe.

SPEAKER_02 30:30

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 30:30

Let's go. That's awesome. And when something happens where somebody calls out, and I'm like, Dow, how am I gonna cover this event? Yeah, my wife immediately goes, Let's split up. I'll take this, you take that. And we make it happen. Yeah. And that's why my wedding vows are written the way they do. Going back to my men's weekend and my legacy discovery weekend of the king. I personally feel that men are princes. Unless we're willing to bow down at the feet of a woman and take her as our queen, just like kings are appointed, anointed. Right. They're crowned. Your wife, your significant other, crowns you her king. And together you build a kingdom.

SPEAKER_02 31:18

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 31:19

And so my wedding vows basically say, which is kind of funny, my dad got offended in some of my wedding vows. Because there's a swear word. Because he's Catholic. Because he's Catholic and there's a swear word. It also didn't help that we got married by our friend who's a lesbian. And not in a church. Yeah. But my vape my vows basically say, I take you as my queen. She takes me as her king. I'm ruthlessly committed to the truth in my marriage above her feelings. And I vowed to build epic shit with her. And we didn't say I do. Yeah. We said all in. Wow. I don't believe in divorce. Only way I'm going out of this is in a body bag, and probably she's gonna put me there, but don't say that.

SPEAKER_01 31:57

Do I need to edit that part out? Maybe edit that part out.

SPEAKER_00 31:59

But anytime I make a smart ass comment, my wife either rolls her eyes and goes, Yeah, that's all mine. Or she looks at somebody and goes, He's the reason why I drink. And you've met my wife, and that's totally something that would come out of her mouth. She is my biggest cheerleader, and I'm blessed that I found her when I did. But like the amount of growth that we've happened between us as individuals and as a couple in 15 years has been astronomical to the growth I've ever had as an individual. And so I'm just eternally grateful for my wife.

SPEAKER_01 32:37

That's awesome. Yeah. That's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 32:39

And you don't have kids. Just this is the fur babies. Just the fur babies. And that was a really that was our first hurdle in our relationship. Was my wife has the second biggest heart and such a nurturing woman next to my mother. I was just saying second biggest. It's like my mom. Okay. I'm I'm also 100% Sicilian. Okay. So I'm a mama's boy.

SPEAKER_01 33:02

So mom's always got to be on top. And I'm the baby boy.

SPEAKER_00 33:05

Gotcha. Right. So I'm the bambino. Okay. And my wife just is an amazing woman. And it was really tough. Like the first two years, I was like, Do you want to have kids? She's like, Yeah, I'd love to be a mom. I don't know if I want to be a dad. I'm not scared of being a dad because all I had to do is be half as good as mine was to me. Yeah. Don't get me wrong, my dad has totally screwed me up too. Like I have traumas from my dad. But my dad's also my best friend.

SPEAKER_01 33:31

Well, he was a military guy, so I can only imagine.

SPEAKER_00 33:34

He's a military guy, and he's a CEO of computer companies, too. Okay. But also, I was raised that Bellavias are not average. So there's a builder instilled in me since I was a kid. So when you're on summer break in fifth, fourth grade, going to the water park and whatnot, guess where we were? We had homework preparing us for the next year. Oh wow. Yeah. So we would go to the library and do the book club stuff and things like that. And we would have assigned reading times, we would have assigned no TV times, like, gotta go outside, gotta go play. Like that's why it really hits home for me when like people are like, you had to come on when the streetlights come on. Yeah. And you uh drink out of a garden hose. Yeah. Yeah. That was me. That was yeah, totally. But here's an example of ADHD, and my mom finally understanding how I processed and how I thought about things was when I first got diagnosed, my mother was told that I'm handicapped. And it's true. People with ADHD are handicapped, but we are also superheroes and we have a superpower. And our superpower is the fact that we can hyperfocus. What is interesting though is being able to hyperfocus on something that we enjoy and something that we love. So one time there was a lizard underneath, there was a hedge, a bush, that ran in between the two yards.

SPEAKER_02 35:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 35:04

And my best friend lived next door. And there was a lizard, a couple of lizards. It couldn't be just one. That was a really long hedge. But I stayed out there in the summertime on my stomach, like trying to catch this lizard with like a glass jar. Didn't catch it, but I was out there for like 10 hours. Wow. And I got sunburned the whole nine yards, but then I would run to the other side of the hedge because there was a lizard there. I was like, man, he's quick all the way to the other side. Hindsight. Probably multiple. Multiple lizards. Yeah. But my mom and my dad were like, he was just out there. And that was me hyper-focusing. So I can hyper focus about cigars where I need to know everything about it. And that's the way I used to be in the cigar business. And as a person, uh consumer, I need to know the binder, wrapper, filler, the origin, the tasting notes, and this, that. And now I actually in the cigar business, I actually don't like the people who do reviews of cigars. I think they're pretentious and retarded. You don't need a 20,000-word dissertation on how a cigar tastes. Yeah. The human palate can't do that. Yeah. Do you like it? Cool. If not, that's why the tagline of my shop is the way it is. Cut, light, repeat. If you don't like it, put it in the ashtray and fire up something different. Yeah. But being able to hyperfocus on stuff and loves that you have got me into where I'm at in the cigar world. Where I had to hyperfocus. And Sam Lacia, who actually owns a shop, but before was in the manufacturing space, he was like a star. And we were hanging out, and I was like, man, I read everything, I look at all the reviews, I smoke everything. I just love cigars. And I'm so green in the industry that I bend towards the light. And Sam looks at me, takes a puff of his cigar, leans forward and blows the smoke in my face and goes, fuck the ratings, fuck what you hear, smoke what you like. If you don't like it, put it in the ashtray. Just take the band off. So somebody else can't pass judgment on the fact that you didn't like it. And from then on, I was like, I'm just gonna love the cigar itself.

SPEAKER_02 37:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:16

I don't care about the story. I don't care about who made it or that he came over in Cuba on a basketball or anything like that. I don't care. Is the cigar good? And am I gonna share it with somebody who I want to spend an hour and a half with? Yeah. You know, and learn about what they've experienced in life. So I don't have to make their mistakes. And that kind of goes back to my men's organization. Yeah. Because I'm hanging out and a tw as a 20-year-old with 50, 60, 70 year olds, I don't have to make their mistakes. You know, men who have lost their wives, men who have gone bankrupt, men who have lost their kids, I don't have to go through that. And knowing that I didn't want to have kids and being around that area really helped me being able to have that tough conversation with my wife. Yes, full circle, ADHD moment. Letting her know, like two years in, hey, if you really want to be a mom, I'm I don't think I'm your guy. So I had no fear of being a dad, but I wanted to build, I wanted to travel, and it wasn't fair to her to leave her alone with the kids. Yeah. I mean, I what solidified it for me that I didn't want kids is my middle child, Havana, the 10-year-old. As a puppy, she jumped up on the bed for the first time, and I wasn't there, and I was devastated. I was like, oh, I missed it. You missed the first. Can you put it back on the floor? Well, it's not just not the same. Imagine if I missed my kids' first words. Yeah. First steps, dance recital, first home run. And my dad was always involved with my stuff. He was an absentee father growing up during the diaper years. But the day I could play baseball, he was there. He was the coach, he was everything. Yeah. And I almost went to pro baseball level. I was a switch hitting catcher since I was five. Fastest way into the mind in the majors. Left-handed pitcher and a switch-hitting catcher.

SPEAKER_02 39:17

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 39:17

And that's why I went to a military school because I was playing so much baseball. And okay, maybe I'll get a better look at West Point if I have the military background already, and I'm playing sports, and the school is smaller, so the odds of me making varsity and being a star player on the team were greater. Yeah. So as a junior, I had actually college people looking at me and two minor teams. And hindsight on it, like knowing who you are as a person and really having those truthful conversations with yourself, I don't think I was a professional ball player level. I would have been what's called a great quadruple A ball player. Or minor league, yeah, something there. Well, it only goes up to triple. So I'd be the guy that would like go up to the pros and then get back down.

SPEAKER_01 40:09

Yep, yeah, bounce back and forth.

SPEAKER_00 40:11

Like I'm too good for triple A, but I'm not good enough for the pros. I think I would probably be a really good bullpen catcher. Gotcha. Warm up the pitchers. Yeah. You know? But and a DH every now and then. Yeah, exactly. But I don't think I was good enough to play like Jorge Posada and all these Hall of Famers. Like they were coming up the same time I was. I mean, I think Jorge's only I'm 45. I think he's maybe four or five years older than me. No way that I have the statistics that that guy did.

SPEAKER_01 40:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 40:40

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 40:42

So that's the So when I hear you talk about cigars, what comes to my mind is a saumonier in the wine business. Yes. Is is it is it a similar world where you where you've got, you know, there's certain people that really get into oh the front notes, back notes, middle, you know, where it is, whatever.

SPEAKER_00 41:07

Yeah. We actually have a designation. So I am technically a certified retail tobacconist. Okay. So I have taken the test by the University of Tobacco. Um sorry, that sounds funny. It is. It's kind of okay.

SPEAKER_01 41:21

I'm gonna kind of comical. I'm sorry. I'm gonna be dead honest.

SPEAKER_00 41:24

Like it's kind of like they could come up with a better terminology. Yeah, the University of Tobacco. Um Tobacco University, I think that's what it's called. Like, even then, I don't like I did it so many years ago, but it was all the rage, like this book came out, and it covered everything from cigars, pipe tobacco, how it's grown, all that stuff. And like you go to the like the trade show, and their their booth is there, and you pay forty dollars and you take a test, and boom, now you have your certified retail tobacconist. Gotcha. And then you also can be a certified, like, wholesale tobacconist, and then you can be a master tobacconist, and then you have to like write a thesis on that. Oh, geez. I disagree with that stuff. Back then I wanted it, so it looked cool in my business card, and so like when pretentious people would come into my shop doing retail, I'd be like, I know more than you, I'm a certified retail tobacconist. Now I'm like, cool, bro, cool story. I disagree with the designations because the guys I have learned from in the cigar industry are gonna forget more things about tobacco than I ever gonna learn. Yeah. And so, like, that's why I disagree with like you have a master's degree in tobacconist. So I do have a des uh designation. Gotcha. I don't use it, I don't put it on my business card.

SPEAKER_01 42:46

Is uh and this is just my lack of knowledge of anything cigar, different regions, you know. Obviously, everybody talks about Cuban cigars. Are they really that much better than cigars coming from other regions? Is it the way they roll it? Is it the way they grow it?

SPEAKER_00 43:00

What Yes and no.

SPEAKER_01 43:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 43:02

No. A Cuban cigar is just as good as a Nicaraguan or a Honduran cigar. They're not rolled on the thighs of naked virgins, like everybody says. But what's so unique about Cuban tobacco is the soil content and the growing region itself. They can't grow a strong cigar because of the soil. It just won't work. For the wine people out there, they can't grow a red wine. Gotcha. But they can grow a rose or a blanc where it's got flavor, it's got body, and you're gonna enjoy it. But after you smoke a Cuban cigar, and how I judge regular cigars too, is do I want another one afterwards? Gotcha. Or is my palate shot and I'm good? Yeah. So Cuban cigars, because of their lifestyle and because of their heritage, they're smoking all day long. They have their breakfast cigar, then they have their morning coffee cigar, then they have their after-lunch cigar, then they have their siesta cigar. Because remember, in Latin cultures like that, they have a break from like two to four. Yeah. And then they come back for two hours, and then they have their after-work smoke, and then they have their dinner cigar, and their nighttime cigar, and they're smoking five or six cigars a day. But they're mild to medium flavors. There's not full like what we like in our palate and in the US is drop kick you in the face. Oh, I want bigger, batter, stronger, faster. Other countries are very much like Cuba, where they don't like that. They like the milds, they like the mediums, they like the Cuban flavored. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:34

Do you remember the first time you smelled a cigar? Like smelled the smoke?

SPEAKER_00 44:39

The retro smoke or the cigar itself?

SPEAKER_01 44:42

Not not not the cigar, but like do you remember because like I it's funny, my dad never smoked.

SPEAKER_00 44:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 44:49

And and I smoke very rarely on the golf course, but every now and then I do, and and actually I've smoked with you on the golf course. Yeah, had had a very Very good cigar that I was very surprised. Because usually I feel like I've I always say licked a cat's ass the next day. Yeah. But I had a cigar that I was like, oh my god, that is a very good cigar.

SPEAKER_00 45:07

But and the reason why that happens is because the pH in your mouth is not used to the soil content and the minerals that are in that cigar. So you're smoking out of your palate. You're smoking above your pay grade. Gotcha. You're smoking a cigar your mouth can't cash. Makes sense. Right. But if you smoke within your palate and something that you enjoy, you won't get that nasty. Lick the cat's ass. Right. But there is a cure for that. What's that? Drink more, smoke more?

SPEAKER_01 46:07

Smoke another cigar. Yeah. Yeah. Uh anyways, I just I can remember. Easy, shameless plug. Cut light repeat. Yeah, cut light repeat. There you go. I I just remember it. I and I the the reason I ask is like I can vividly remember going to college football games with my dad back in the 70s, early 80s. And you're sitting in the stands and the old guys are all sitting around smoking cigars. It's like I can smell that smell. And every time I smell a cigar, that's what I think of. Takes me right there.

SPEAKER_00 46:38

I can't remember the first time I smelled the smoke of a cigar. But I can remember the first time I smelled a cigar. What we call a cold smell. Just like when you cut a cigar and you watch somebody like take a couple puffs off it within it's not lit, it's called a cold draw. Okay. So just smelling the raw part of the cigar is like a cold smell. Okay. They smell the foot and all that cool stuff. Was I think I was like in my teens. It had to be. So it was probably like 94. I was probably 14, maybe 15. My dad was showing me his humidor. And all these cool cigars that he brought back from Singapore and telling me all about Singapore, of how clean the city is, and you can't chew gum, you can't spit, you get fine, they'll cane you. But all the cigars he brought back, and like telling me about these cigars, and like, well, this cigar right here is what Fidel Castro smokes, the head of Hancho in Cuba. And these are so illegal in the United States, but they're so good. Yeah. So that was the first time I remember like smelling that. And I just don't remember being around my dad smoking. Yeah. I don't remember my grandfather smoking.

SPEAKER_01 47:53

My grandfather smoked, my mom's dad smoked a pipe. And he had a room in he had a room in the house. He was a doctor. He had a room in the house that he would smoke a pipe. And usually it was the room that we stayed in, like when we go visit. Oh, so the remnants were there. So it was like I could smell that. And I so the pipe, which you don't smell very often. You don't see a lot of people smoking pipes anymore.

SPEAKER_00 48:14

No, it's really outdated. But uh I have a bunch of pipes that oh, it smelled so good. I cannot smoke a pipe. Let me rephrase that. I can smoke a pipe, I can't pack a pipe. Like I just don't have the finesse. Yeah. Like it takes talent. Cassie's grandfather was a huge pipe smoker. I have a pipe that I've only smoked out of it with him.

SPEAKER_01 48:34

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_00 48:35

That's cool. Yeah. I don't think my grandfather smoked a pipe. My grandfather passed when I was eight, but like legacy for me is a really big thing. It's been embreded in me. Well, you're Sicilian. 100%, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 48:49

So it kind of comes with the territory.

SPEAKER_00 48:51

Well, so my name is Frank. My dad's name is Charles. My grandfather's name is Frank. My great-grandfather is my great-grandfather, great-great grandfather is Flanco. Great-great-great-great-great grandfather is Cormelo. Oh wow. So the first male son is named after the grandfather. And so, like, for me, my dad is like my hero. You know, he's also the biggest dick I know, too. Yeah. Like, my dad's also lovingly. Lovingly. It's it's kind of weird. So, like, my dad is my biggest cheerleader, my biggest confidant, my best friend, but he's also my biggest bully, too. Like I said earlier, Bellovias were raised not to be average. Well, when you keep hearing that, we're not average, we're not average, we're not average. Subconsciously, children are caught, they're not taught. They catch things. So subconsciously, when you are being told as a child, you're not average, you're not average, you're not average, you're above average, you're above average, you're above average, it triggers you that you're not good enough.

SPEAKER_01 49:56

Yeah. Because you're you're not hitting that mark. Correct. That's why you're being told. Correct.

SPEAKER_00 50:01

Yeah. Yes. And like to add fuel to the fire going to military school was not all fun and games for me. I was a really good student, but I was bullied the shit out of in high school. I was the fattest freaking kid at that school. Really? Oh yeah. Before puberty hit, I was fast and skinny. Like I ran a mile on five minutes. Wow. I won awards, I won races because my dad was like doing 5K's and 10Ks. And they're like, hey, you can do the mile race for the kids, and I would pillase like 12. Like I was fast as fuck, boy.

SPEAKER_02 50:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 50:33

Then puberty hit and I got fat. Oh wow. My senior year of high school, I was 285. Oh my goodness. Yeah. I wore a size 44 pants. Wow. Yeah. Like during baseball, I went to go run down to first base during a play to like back up first base. Yeah. And I get back to home plate. My coach goes, Nice try. We'll just have the right fielder come in. Stay here. But I could hit the long ball. Oh my god. But like I could bat left and right. That's crazy. So like that's why I was on varsity. Not because I was fast. Yeah. Like I had to get like I had to hit a double in order to get a single. Yeah. Or I had to hit a home run. And like, I like the stairs, like running around. Yeah. And then I got taken out at home plate my junior year and my knee got blown out. Yeah. But so I got bullied big time in high school to the point that like I fought my bully and broke his nose. Like enough was enough. Yeah. Yeah. And then uh he actually threw me out of a window during that, not out, but threw me towards a wall and my hand went through a window. Oh wow. And then I like broke his nose.

SPEAKER_01 51:39

I uh had a similar situation where I was picked on a lot as a kid up until junior high. Yeah. And then one of the kids that picked on me was picking on a friend of mine in the locker room. And I don't know what it was. It just triggered me and I lost it. I just lost it. And took him outside and smashed his head against a brick wall. And nobody bugged me after that.

SPEAKER_00 52:06

What's funny is I I had a bully in seventh and eighth grade, Todd Schuster. We're actually really close friends. Are you? Oh yeah. Because like we actually got into a fight and like got suspended for a couple days and then like didn't talk during high school and then reconnected at the gym like 10 years later. We're like, man, that was so stupid of us in junior high. Yeah. And like still I was at his wedding, I was a groomsman. Like, we still talk to this day. It's not as often, but like every six months we'll drop each other a note. Hey man, thinking of you. That's awesome. But my bully to show the anti-archetypes. I get kicked out of school, and as I'm being escorted off campus, I see the bully because he's talking to the adult TAC officer, teacher, advisor, counselor. I was like, yeah, so uh, I'm out of here, man. No hard feelings. Like, we're good, dude. See you around. And he looks at me, looks at my hand, looks at the tack officer and goes, good riddance with bad rubbish, and walks away. Oh, geez. I wanted to freaking deck him. And the tack officer knew that we were like frenemies. Yeah. And he also slept in my quad. So it's not like you're on the other side of campus. Day-to-day interactions. He was in my company, he was in my platoon.

unknown 53:24

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 53:24

It was bad. And because of our designation, we were in the color guard. That's also why, like, the American flag means a lot to me. And so the TAC officer like grabbed me. He was like, Felivia, we can't expel you, but you can go to jail. So 20 years later, at my 20-year reunion, he actually split the class. So he got an Airbnb, and like my graduating class was only like 40 kids.

SPEAKER_02 53:54

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 53:55

So when we all go, there's like 25 of us. Yeah. So a bunch of us all stay in a hotel, and he's got this dope Airbnb with like his six cronies from high school. Yeah. And he's like, oh yeah, come over from the house. Still living in the past. Still living in the past. Like he peaked in high school. And oh yeah, come on over, come on over. Oh, but don't bring Bellavia. Like 20 years later. Wow. So like our reunion was split in two locations, and like guys were going back and forth to like hang out with me and then hang out with him. Oh my god. But it's just like it goes to show like the immaturity of people and not being able to evolve, you know, and grow. So that's why I'm very fortunate and blessed that I've been able to do the personal men's development work at a young age. Because of that, and having the life I've lived and living in the nightclub business and hanging out with not so shady characters? Or but learning how they operate business, it really made sense to me when my dad would tell me growing up, do you know what happens when you're 25% book smart and 75% street smart? Do you know what that makes you in business? I was like, I don't know, PhD. It's like, no, it makes you dangerous because you see things that people don't.

SPEAKER_02 55:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 55:23

And so having that growth of being in the nightclubs and then also having the growth after the fact from the men's organization of growing emotionally as a person and and being able to find my own vulnerabilities really I think prepared me to be the husband that I am now with my wife. Because I wear the pants in my marriage, she just tells me which ones to put on.

SPEAKER_01 55:47

There you go. Yeah. What I like that. I've actually never heard that before. That's that's pretty funny. Today you're wearing khaki. Yeah. Tomorrow the bloomers.

SPEAKER_00 55:56

Yep. But at the same time, like she's super amazing woman where I'm like, I'm going golfing.

SPEAKER_02 56:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:02

Well, when are you going? My tea time's in two hours. Well, when did you book it? Three days ago. And you didn't tell me. Oh, I forgot. Alright, have fun. Bye. We'll go do laundry. Yeah. I think I live part of that.

SPEAKER_01 56:16

So I just don't, you know, you do it and then you don't think about it, and then you're like, oh, I think I told you, but I can't remember if I told you. Oh yeah. Now I'm thinking maybe it was a conversation in my head.

SPEAKER_00 57:03

Oh yeah. So speaking of ADHD and like it being a superpower, but it also being a handicap. My wife is handicapped because of me. So we'll be talking and I'm thinking about 15 things at once. Like all up in like if I get quiet, she'll be like, Frank, what are you thinking about? Oh, I'm thinking about this, I'm thinking about this, I'm thinking about this. How? You've only been quiet for a minute.

SPEAKER_06 57:23

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 57:24

So I will have conversations with my wife, and she go, What? Well, she's like, wait a minute, you told me about this, and then you jumped to this, but I thought you were referring to this. I was like, oh no, I was done with that. I already talked about that. But you got just to the end part of like, we need to bring the canopy here. But there was no context of why do we need to bring the canopy here?

SPEAKER_01 57:45

Christine will literally, and this is not slamming her because she knows she does it, she'll start seven conversations. Guilty. And pretty soon you're like, wait a second, what are you talking about? And she kind of almost gets upset with you. But it's like you're like, wait, I'm just trying to keep up with where we are and what's happening here.

SPEAKER_00 58:04

It's like and I I will get upset with my wife. Like, I am very much like your significant other. I'm like, why can't you be in my brain? So I don't have to go over all this.

SPEAKER_01 58:14

Why do you even ask me that? It's like, yeah, I'm just trying to make sure I understand what we're talking about so I can categorize it.

SPEAKER_00 58:21

And her response is like, uh-uh, I don't want to be in there. Yeah. I don't know how you're in there.

SPEAKER_01 58:26

No. Yeah. No, for sure. For sure. What what's something with regards to, you know, where you've been, corporate life, you you're an entrepreneur, you're still working for somebody else, but you know, you're you're you're pushing through the barriers to get yourself, you know, we'll we'll call it standing on your own with the business, right?

SPEAKER_00 58:45

Yes. I still don't take a paycheck from the company.

SPEAKER_01 58:48

And and most most of us don't.

SPEAKER_00 58:50

I mean Which is funny because all builders and entrepreneurs and business owners always give us that piece of advice. Pay yourself first. Doesn't happen. Fuck no. No.

SPEAKER_01 59:03

You're like I was just I was literally just having this conversation with somebody the other day, maybe yesterday. What is today? Tuesday. Might have been yesterday. And we were talking about.

SPEAKER_00 59:14

I I literally what day is it too?

SPEAKER_01 59:16

Yeah. Yeah. Grow growing a business and being a business owner is totally different than owning companies. Right? So if if you own companies, let's let's say like an Elon Musk, right? He owns companies. Dude's wicked smart. I'm not taking anything from him, right? But he has people who run those organizations for him. Correct. And the and there's a being a business owner, yes, you're basically buying a job.

SPEAKER_00 59:45

Kind of. I disagree with you a little bit, but dis but agree with you on some things. Okay, so as a business owner, if you are like prime example, corporate guys that open cigar shops. Oh man, I made a bunch of money at Apple and I love cigars, and now I retired, and we had dividends, and I'm gonna take $100,000 and open a cigar shop. Or I'm gonna take $500,000 and open up a cigar bar. They cost way more than that. But giving you a round number. Well, all he did was put money into something so that he could be an owner operator and get a paycheck.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:25

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:26

Because he's tricked, he's a slave. I personally feel that a Kevin O'Leary said it, Mr. Wonderful, and it's true if you see it. Maybe you can add the clip to this. Being a W-2 employee is the biggest form of modern-day slavery. That you give me your time, I give you money. You do something for me, I give you money, but you are a slave to me. And so what some of these business owners think is, oh, I'm a business owner. No, you just became a slave to your own company.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:58

So that's during this time of learning about myself and going through these men's organizations and stuff, I started looking and seeking coaches because just like if you want to get into shape, you hire a trainer. Well, if you want to grow your business, you hire a trainer, somebody who's done it before you. And a lot of these guys are full of shit that are out there. But some of my VIP clients are not, and they're just amazing men like Ed Milette, Mark Evans, Keaton Hodgkins, Rob Bailey. They have coaching groups. But during that, I've also had some other coaches that are POS's. Do you work for your business or do you work on your business? Yeah. And the greatest example I can think of this is my buddy who's not in our network, who needs to be in our network, is Kyle Beck. He owns tactical pest control. He works on his business. He only works for his business when like somebody quits and they already have jobs lined up. But I try to work on Figueroa, not for Figueroa. Makes sense. And having that, I don't know, standard has kind of changed the way I looked at how cigar shops are ran and how I operate mine. So I can just be more effective and grow if I'm working on the business, not for it. Yep. Yeah. I don't know if that answered your question.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:32

No, I think it did. I mean more kind of statement. But yeah, absolutely. I think it did. Like, did I just go down an ADHD route? Oh, yeah, I mean, maybe. We talk about things all day. Nobody will follow. Pretty much. I love it. What's your vision for Figure auto? What what what do you what do you want it to be and what does success look like to you for it?

SPEAKER_00 1:02:52

Good question. It's changed so much over the years. I just want to be happy and I want to make enough money with the company that I don't need to worry about paying my mortgage. I want to be able to cool, we got money in the bank. Everybody wants to be a millionaire. And I'm very much like that too. If I made a million dollars a year, it's not enough. Hence trauma for my dad. Right. Bellowies are hard average. You make a million, why can't you make two? Right. You make two, why can't you make three? But I just want to live a comfortable life. I want to be able to go on vacation with my wife and randomly go on vacation. Not like, okay, cool, we've had to save up and we're going to Mexico. I want to be able on like Tuesday be like, you wanna go to Cancun this weekend? So-and-so's got the shop.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:03:42

Let's go and book it. Or surprise her and be like, pack, here's your bag. Yeah. And already have it packed. And she's like, what are you doing? We're going to Las Vegas for the weekend. I want to be able to live. It's really interesting you ask that, because that's like a parallel to what's your why? And what's kind of unfortunate about not having kids is I don't have a why. My why is my wife. That's my why. And if you Which is good enough. It's good enough, yes. And what's funny is if you ask my wife what's her why, is so that I don't have to have a full-time job and I can focus on Figueroa. And what's my why is that my wife doesn't have to have a full-time job and she can stay at home. Just like the king and queen dynamic. Yep. I buy you a house, you build me a home. Yep. Right. And so that's what I want out of my relationship and out of Figueroa is to not worry about it, to live a stress free life, to be happy.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:44

What's interesting with that, and and it's it's funny because I talk about I talk about Christine, I don't know if that's the right way to say it. W when Christine and I have conversations, my my thing is I would like her to not have to work. Has nothing to do with me being, you know, misogynistic pig or whatever.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:03

It doesn't have to do with that. It still has to do with your embredded in your DNA as a provider.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:08

Right. The caveman. And it's it's it's the ability to be able to say you don't have to work. Correct. You can work. Correct. Go do whatever you want to do, but it's not you have to do that because the only way we can survive as a couple is if you're correct.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:24

And part of you as a man, correct me if I'm wrong, I know I feel this way. So speaking personally, knowing that my wife has to go to work every single day and pull a nine to five job is kind of emasculating to me.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:36

Oh, absolutely.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:37

That I'm not good enough, thanks, dad, to be able to provide for my wife if she doesn't have to work.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:42

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:05:43

I know for a fact, 100%, if I made a million dollars a year, my wife would still work. Oh, and I think Christine would be. She would most likely probably run her own rescue organization. I was just gonna say it's a 10013C and work.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:55

They can do it together. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. It's you know, it's it's one of those things where it's like she would still be involved in something, whether it was some type of animal rescue or working with the homeless or you know, whatever it was.

SPEAKER_00 1:06:08

But that's a testament to the women that are in our lives of their heart, yeah, and the quality of nurturing women that we have and how blessed we are, that most women wouldn't do that. Yeah. And the fact that they chose us got her fooled. Yeah, yeah, exactly. I always tell everybody, like, we j we have this joke that like the best decision I ever made was to ask her to marry me. Yeah. And then she's like, yeah. And I was like, she's really not that smart because she said yes. Um, but that's awesome. My wife, my wife is fantastic, yeah. And I'm just blessed, but to to roundabout ADHD moment again. She's my why, and where would I love to see Figueroa go? I would love to see us have our dream, which is a brick and mortar cigar bar.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:58

Well, what is that what does that look like? So, like not to drop names, but I know of one in Gilbert, whatever. There's some great ones out here. I I feel like there could be something very cool, provided the right investment. So, what you are talking about, my friend?

SPEAKER_00 1:07:15

They have a great business model. I used to sell to all these guys. Nobody I will ever talk bad about. They have business model and they are making money. But because of their mindset, they don't have the secret sauce. And uh because I've been able to travel and pick things from a million dollars a year cigar bar, oh wow, they do this really well. They they don't do that really well. Okay. Well, this other one that's doing a million dollars a year, he does that really well, but but he doesn't do that really well. And so I've been able to pick that and formulate that into a business plan.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:07:56

And I'm just gonna be like an artist and steal like an artist. Yeah. So there's a lot of great things that a lot of cigar shops have, there's a lot of things that they They don't do right. But cigar shop A will do it right and cigar shop B won't.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:11

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:08:12

So I want to combine all of them. So mine is what very early on I realized that Figueroa meant. Besides the shape of a cigar, is I came up with C E squared. And it stands for customer experience and customer education. We were providing a niche in the beginning with our membership boxes of education to new smokers. A lot of cigar shops don't do that. They provide education of the latest and greatest, but you have a B aficionado to kind of appreciate the latest and greatest boxes of cigars. But we were actually people who our demographic in the beginning was people who just kind of started smoking cigars that were only around for like two or three years in the cigar world. We were introducing them to cigars for 15 years that they would have never experienced. Yeah. And so instead of the latest and greatest, it's the hits. Yeah. And that's what I want to do with the cigar bar that we open is I want to focus on customer experience. When you walk into some cigar shops and no-dig at the cigar shops, it's par for the course. Hey, welcome to XYZ Cigar Shop. Let me know if you need help. Yeah. Yeah. Welcome to Figaro Cigar Company. Come on into the humidor. How can I help you? What do you usually smoke? Light, medium, full. And I also have my humidor organized a different way. It's not brand specific. And so you take them to their section and you put stuff on a tray. Like I have a vision for this. I already have it drawn out in a blueprint. Also, like very much as a builder, we need to visualize our success. Yeah. I literally have it drawn out on a plat of how where the bar's gonna be, where's this gonna be, where's this gonna be, and how my staff is gonna interact with the customer. We're gonna walk in with a tray. Yeah. And we're gonna wait on you. And then we're gonna have the bar and we're gonna walk you to your just like a hostess, we're gonna walk you to your table. Like, I'm gonna go ahead and grab Stephanie and she's gonna become right back with your drinks. Then you go get Stephanie, and now the cocktail waitress comes up. Hey, welcome. What can I get for you guys? And you have a level of service. And so your experience makes you coming back and you become a destination location because of how you were treated.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:39

Most of the times that's why you came back to a restaurant.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:42

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_00 1:10:42

Is yeah, the food was good, but you came back to how you were treated. Right. Because if the food is stellar but you were treated like shit, you're not going back. Right. And then it also goes back into the business rule, too. That if you have a bad experience at a location or at a business, you will tell 10 to 15 people how bad that place was. Yeah. Because everybody loves to talk smack. Everybody loves the drama. But if you have a killer stellar experience, you're only going to tell about two people. So we want to have those two so that those two tell too and that it builds, not oh, I had the worst experience here.

unknown 1:11:19

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:11:19

I want to be like, man, I had such a great experience. I need to tell more than two people. Yeah. Of how amazing this cigar bar was. Yeah. How welcoming they were, how professional they were, but how friendly and non-pretentious they were. And that they didn't get mad at me for asking what I thought was a dumb question about cigar, but it turns out 50 people ask that a day. Yeah. That's what we want. Yeah. I want to mix the cigar bars like that you have seen and experienced out here in our state of Arizona. I want to mix that with cheers. Yeah. Where everybody knows your name. Yeah. Hey Tom, you want your regular? Let me go grab it.

unknown 1:12:00

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:01

Or somebody who's new, hey, how you doing? That's the vision I have for Figueroa is to open a brick and mortar cigar bar down where I live.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:10

Because also you need to think about in business is the competitive landscape. Yeah. Who's your competitor? The closest cigar shop that I want to open to is like 35 minutes away. Wow. I don't want to drive 35 minutes to go smoke a cigar.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:20

No.

SPEAKER_00 1:12:21

Yeah. So we are looking for investors and we do have a business plan about it. Hit me up.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:26

Well, APN's a good place to be because there are some people in there that you could probably have a conversation with that may uh listen. Exactly. Real quick, we'll start wrapping up here, but um if if you were able to go back and have a conversation with your 13-year-old self, what would you tell that person?

SPEAKER_00 1:12:45

Oh I've actually done this module and some uh men's work that we've done before. Also, uh it's really killer to do this. Have you ever done a breath work session? Hole do it. Couple rounds, and you hold your breath, and like you actually end up seeing yourself by like the third round, and you can end up holding your breath for like five minutes because you oxygenate your body. Oh wow, it's pretty cool. And then also I've done some Native American sweat lodges, okay, and you get very humbled uh with how hot it is in there, and you talk to yourself and you like come out muddy because the steam and you're like getting closer to Mother Earth, get away from the heat and the mud is cold. Interesting, and then you walk out looking like a mud man. But while you're laying on the ground getting close to Mother Earth and humbling yourself, you have conversations with yourself. And I've had conversations with my 13-year-old self before. And one of the things I keep telling myself when I look at myself in the mirror is it's okay to fail. Fail means first attempt in learning, and it doesn't make you a bad person and it doesn't make you an inadequate. What makes you weak as a person is if you stop trying. And that's what a lot of builders and entrepreneurs don't get. It's not the end destination, that's like the end all be all. It's looking back at the journey and knowing it won't break you. I mean, look at Andy Frazella. Like he's a billionaire, owns first form nutrition, but his first business of first form, he slept on a mattress in the back. Now the dude's got more cars and more money than he knows what to do with. He's still a stellar guy. Yeah. But hearing stuff like that, when I envision looking talking to my 13-year-old self, it's it's that. But I would also tell him she's not gonna be here forever, and the heartbreak is gonna hurt, but the right one will come when you least expect it. And that's what happened with me and my wife. I was engaged three times, married once, but every time I would like have a heartbreak, and I would also tell that to my 13-year-old self. The reason why heartbreak is gonna hurt so much when you're growing up is because you didn't know who you were as a person, and so your fake self was in a relationship with somebody else, and so you have remorse of no, that's not really who I am. So I would tell my 13-year-old self, this is just a phase, and just try to be real, raw, and authentic. Yeah. It didn't click for me until I was probably like 27. And still to this day, like I want people to like me. Yeah. Like I have trauma for my bully. You don't like me? Well, why don't you like me? I'm such a good person. Some people just don't like you because they don't like you. Right. And you can't explain it. Right. But I would also tell that to my 13-year-old self. Some people aren't gonna like you, but it's no big deal. Yeah, don't care what people think. And still at 45, I'm like, why why do people think that?

SPEAKER_01 1:15:57

Yeah. Yeah. Rerunning conversations in your head. Did I say the right thing? Did I act the right way? Did I bring the right person with me?

SPEAKER_00 1:16:04

Right. So yeah. And it's okay not to have somebody be your friend. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:10

Yeah, for sure. Well, hey, I really appreciate having the chance to get to know you a bit, get to know more about Figuardo. Figurado? Did I say that right? Ferado. Ferrado. Yep. Someday I will learn how to say that. I think this is the most personal stuff we've ever talked.

SPEAKER_00 1:16:28

Yeah. Yeah, we've always talked about business and like kind of superficial stuff. Like, how's business going? What do you do? Oh, yeah, we might need to talk. But this is like the most you and I have ever talked about real stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:41

Well, it's it's nice because I feel like and really that's where I wanted these conversations to go when I started the podcast, is like, how do you have a conversation with somebody and not I mean we're talking business, but we're not talking business. Correct. Right? I'm not trying to sell you on something, you're not trying to sell me on something. We're really having a conversation educationally get to get to know each other on a different level. And so it's an encouraging thing where you say, okay, you know, hey, if if there's somebody in the network, we talk about a bug par network, but when there's somebody in the network, if you want to get to know them, look to see if there's a podcast available for them before you go meet with them. Because now we've had this conversation. Somebody might come in and say, Okay, let's let's go deeper. And sometimes I go deeper, sometimes I say surface, but man, I'd I'd love someday to sit down and go, okay, tell me about these men's weekend.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:31

Oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:31

You know, I mean, as much as you can tell me, because if there's like a secret sauce you can't talk about, but there's a lot of secret sauce.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:37

Like my dad can't even talk to me about his men's weekend. Wow. And I did the same men's weekend because they're different. Gotcha. Different experiences and things. We do, like, hey, do you remember this one time? Yeah. But we don't be like, so names, faces, and what happens at men's weekends and men's meetings, you can't talk about you know, it almost sounds like some type of weird cult cult.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:17:58

Well, the Catholic Church is a cult.

unknown 1:17:59

Well, okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:18:00

But yeah, like you can't talk about any of that stuff. I can't be like, oh, well, Tim did this. You can only talk about what you gained from it. Gotcha. One of the men was going through something and it triggered me to feel this way. Is all you can really talk about in those weekends. But I can tell you the purpose of the men's weekend because it's been inbreded into me. Basically, I have it 90% down still. The purpose of the men's weekend is to find the barriers that prevent you from being the man you've always wanted to be, and with that, dissolving those barriers and experiencing total freedom as only a man can, and with that freedom, be the man you've always wanted to be. I think I nailed it. But sounded good. That's how powerful these weekends are. And the weekends are really good about fixing broken men, yeah, but they're also really good about elevating a good man to another level. And they're like super powerful. But most men, unfortunately, if you look at the statistic of how many men go through these weekends, of the 300 men that go in them, 220 are broken men. Wow. That have lost a bunch.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:19:05

60 of them are men that are just open finally to there's another level to me as a man. I'm not a bad guy, I've never done prison time or anything like that. I have a good relationship with my dad, but something's preventing me from going forward. Yeah. And that's I'll talk to you about those weekends. And if you ever want to do the men's weekend, there's one way you can tell me. Yeah. And it's pretty cool. And it's legendary because I did it in a restaurant in front of everybody. So if you want to do the men's weekend and go through the men's weekend, you make an unalterable commitment, which means you must finish. So if you don't do the weekend and you don't finish the weekend, you broke your commitment. And so two things separate men from women. Our word. Because if a man goes back on his word, nothing else. He's a slime bag, nothing else left, and our balls. And so if you want to do the men's weekend, preferably when somebody's talking or in a large group area, you do what a man can only do, which is you put your right hand on your right nut and your left hand on your left nut and grab your balls, and at the loudest decibel you can you can say. I get goosebumps every time I talk about it. Seriously. Seriously. And you yell, fuck it, as loud as you can, as long as you can. And that is you preaching to the world, making this commitment that you want to dissolve the barriers and you want to be a better man. It just goes like, but it's like a thousand degree. Like you get frustrated on something, you're like, fuck it. Nope, I gotta finish it. Fuck it. I'm gonna go through this barrier. I'm gonna finish this. Yeah. Same thing, but it's about your life.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:52

Interesting.

SPEAKER_00 1:20:53

Yeah. It's pretty cool. What's random ADHD moments? So my dad sponsored me to my men's weekend, and then I did my legacy discovery weekend.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:02

Okay.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:03

And then I became the production manager. My dad did his legacy discovery weekend. My last weekend is the production manager, and I was his sponsor.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:11

Oh wow. Yeah. How cool is that? Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:14

That's cool.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:15

Well, hey, Frank, I really appreciate it. Oh, yeah, definitely. Appreciate you coming on. I do have a gift for you because everybody comes on gets a gift, so I've got one for you. Oh. That uh you've got a challenge coin there. And you can open the box if you would like. It is a uh a glass, a little tumbler like this, as I went above and beyond. Got your name on it. You're one of the last of 2025, so it's kind of a collector's item at this point. Hell yeah, this is dope. So, anyways, but hey, I appreciate you taking the time and uh really uh am thankful for getting to know you a bit.

SPEAKER_00 1:21:51

Oh, definitely. I just had an idea a little while ago that I need to get off my chest. Let's do it. You do so many podcasts where you interview people. Has there ever been a podcast where somebody's interviewed you?

SPEAKER_01 1:22:05

Oddly enough, we just finished that. So TJ Tillman came in. Oh, yeah, okay. And uh it will release on Christmas Day. So he was the host. He was the host, interviewed me, and uh yeah, so great minds think alike. Yeah, for sure. It's funny because he had he had kind of hit me up on that early on. He's like, it would be so cool if I could just interview you.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:26

And I'm like, Yeah, we'll yeah, because nobody knows your story.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:30

Yeah, and we we covered a bit, but you know, it's funny because in an hour you can only cover so much. Oh, yeah. Then stuff starts coming out, and you're like, oh man. And then it the funny thing is before we recorded that, I was super nervous. I'm like, this is weird, like this is like about me type of thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:22:47

Oh, yeah, nobody likes to hold the mirror.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:49

Yeah, yeah. And then we start talking, and then you know, we get done, and I'm like, oh man, I should have talked about this, I should have talked about that. So it's one of those things. I love the fact that I can sit here and relate with you and your story and think, okay, yeah, oh man, something similar, you know, happened to me or or whatever. And you know, sometimes we have those conversations where it's like we're we're it's interesting because you bring up the whole man thing, which I which I feel like, you know, not to go down a whole philosophical rabbit hole, which I definitely could do, but I feel like we're I'll give you a list of amazing books to read, by the way. We we are we are conditioned to not share feelings, but we need to share feelings. Correct. We're we're conditioned to be strong but meek, you know, correct. And so it's it's one of these things where it's really interesting to have these conversations where it's like being able to share a part of who we are outside of the the walls of the business, so to speak, right? And be able to say that this is who I am and and and kind of tear those down. And and it's funny because I've been going back through my head of of people, it's like, okay, I'd like to have this person come back on again because now we talk deeper. Yeah. Go go further down this hole of whatever.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:04

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:05

And and as much as I very much enjoy listening to Joe Rogan, it's really hard to listen to a five-hour podcast. So we try to keep this an hour, hour and a half. Oh, yeah. Which is still tough to listen to, right? I mean, 30 minutes in the car here or there, you get pieces of it. And so trying to think of okay, how can we package this so it's more palatable, not palatable, but but consumable.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:26

No, palatable is the right word. Consumable, consumable, even better word.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:29

To be able to say, okay, I can take this in small doses and and take it.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:33

Well, there's a simple solution to that. Cut it up. Seriously, do an hour and a half long podcast, but do part one, part two, part three. Yeah, yeah. And that way somebody's only pot committed for 30 minutes.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:43

As opposed to an hour and a half.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:45

Well, and and that that may be what it comes to.

SPEAKER_00 1:24:47

And I'll be honest, the reason why I I would suggest that is the powerful stuff in a podcast like what you're doing, yeah. The powerful stuff comes from the back end. Yeah. Because at first it was very superficial. Where are you from? This, that. We've only talked maybe 15, 20 times at events, and it's superficial stuff. So the beginning of our podcast was very superficial. And then as we talked and as we correlated, as we identified with each other, the masks, as I talked earlier, come earlier where I can be 100% vulnerable with you, and you're not gonna stab me in my heart. Yep. But like we talked about being emasculated. Yeah. Some dude off the street, I can't talk to him about that in the grocery store. Right. But we have that level, and that's why this podcast is so amazing, is because people who have been on the podcast, I look at them differently now when I'm out at events. Or I'm like, wow, he's real. Yeah. As opposed to, oh, I'm just a roofer. Yeah. Or I'm just a realtor.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:48

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:48

Oh, I'm just an electrician.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:49

Yep.

SPEAKER_00 1:25:50

I'm like, no.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:51

Yeah, you're a person. You're a person. Yeah. Well, and it's crazy too, because like having Doug Hopkins on. You know, it's like and I'm so cool. I love Doug. He is. Brady Bogan, same thing.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:02

I don't know how he golfs as well as he does with that swing. That swing is wretched.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:07

That's awesome. But you know, you have guys on that it's like we've talked about imposter syndrome. Oh, yeah. You know, being people saying, oh, well, you're this. It's like, no, I'm just me, right? I'm just me. I'm no better than anybody else. I mean, have I done things? Sure. Do I know people? Yeah. But it's just because I've put myself out there.

SPEAKER_00 1:26:27

So my dude, my mentor, Ed Milette, talks about that a lot. Yeah. It's crazy. Ed Milette has to be one of the best motivational speakers I have ever met in my life. And I'm honored and privileged that I call him also a friend. He's a billionaire. Wow. And we talk on Instagram, and I'm his cigar guy. But that guy has been broke. Broke, broke, broke. Yeah. And now he owns an island. But he talks about that in some of his podcasts and some of his speaking engagements that he suffers from imposter syndrome. Wow.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:27:02

And even in his book, The One, uh, The Power of One More. Okay. Barrier. Power of One More. He talks about that of going that extra mile, but he talks about him being an imposter. Yeah. Who am I to tell you how to run a business? Yep. How to live your life.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:20

Well, in any of it, right? I mean, you could fill that blank. How am I, you know, capable, responsible, qualified, whatever it is, to blank?

SPEAKER_00 1:27:31

One and a why? And he covers that in his book. His father was an alcoholic. And that's how he became who he is by having to read his dad. But his dad started sponsoring people and got sober. And he said, I'm gonna get sober. And he was like, Well, what's different about this time, Dad? And he's like, I just gotta stay sober for one more day. Yeah. Power one more. Yep. And then now, when his dad passes, all these note cards come surfacing up of people and their dates. And it was their sobriety date. And his dad would call these people. And he's like, How is my dad sober and doing this and saving all these people? Well, why? Because the guy that saved my dad was a meth addict and a drug addict. Yeah. And so the imposter syndrome is it's just that. Like, who am I to talk to somebody about chasing their dreams and almost going bankrupt and being six months behind on their mortgage, but stick with it? Yep. It's only temporary.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:34

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:34

Who am I to talk to somebody about that? Because I've lived it. Right. Because I've gone through it. Yep.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:39

I've almost lost my house.

SPEAKER_00 1:28:40

Our car got repossessed.

SPEAKER_01 1:28:42

You gotta you gotta listen to my episode. You'll I mean, and I don't want to I mean No spoiler. This will come out after that, but truly, I mean, bankruptcy, divorce, foreclosure. I I've done it. I and I I joke that that my life at that time, any country star would have loved to have my life just to be able to write the song about it. Oh yeah. But you know, and it's funny because TJ and I really connected on that level with regards to the things that he's been through and the things that I've been through, and and be able to go, yeah, you know what? And you have the opportunity to sit in a corner and and and be the victim, or you have the opportunity to get up and say, one more, right? And and there Chad Dunn is another guy that was on the on the podcast, has has a business in town, but he went through the same process and he talks about you know you're you're one decision away from being back in jail or being a meth addict or being an alcoholic or being you know, whatever. And it's that one decision. And that's an Ed's book. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:29:45

Yeah, it's a killer book. I'll get you a copy of it. He's an amazing man. That's awesome. There's another idea that you just spawned to. What's that? ADHD moment. You should do a podcast with a couple of other people. Like, as you've done these episodes, you kind of know, like bring people into yeah, like I I think Frank and TJ and Doug would be. Really good if we could do a handle.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:08

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:09

And then have people write in questions to these guys. Because now they've all seen our episodes. Yeah. And they know what we've experienced. They can ask certain questions and you do this, and like we can all crosstalk to each other too. Yeah. We do a round table.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:25

Oh yeah. Well, there's there's definitely some stuff coming. Space. You know, different things that come into but I lo I love where your mind's going because I feel this I feel it. It's it is one of those things where to me it's it's a platform to be able to break some barriers. Yeah. Right? Take some walls down, become better friends.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:30:46

Um, you know, be able to have a community where we can support each other and understand that we're not so different.

SPEAKER_00 1:30:53

So better husbands, better fathers, better businessmen. Yeah. That was the point of the men's organization in California. So that we could be better men in our community.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:04

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 1:31:05

And I that's what you're doing here with this podcast is being able to create a platform so that people can be better people in their community. Yep. Yeah. Absolutely. So I love it. Well hey, thank you very much. Have me on again. I will be here in a heartbeat. I would love it. This is Frank Bellavia, and I went above and beyond.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:24

Where stories we share, beyond the fairways, friendships grow in APN's embrace, opportunity slow. No happy talking, just real deals, authentic connections, the kind that heals from. We are going above and beyond. Reaching new eyes. From this start to call our spirit unit. APN is the beacon, our guiding light. So here's the APN where dreams alight.

unknown 1:32:16

In every connection, a chance to shine.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:21

In APN's network, we truly thrive.