Why Everything Feels So Heavy Right Now (And How to Simplify Your Life)

Welcome back to Trusting Her Journey. Season 2 is here!

In this first episode of the season, Felicia and Christalyn are starting the year a little differently. No pressure to “reset.” No rushing. No pretending you’re not already tired.

This conversation is for the woman who loves God, is trying her best, and still feels like she’s carrying too much. We’re talking about what it can look like to let life be simple; not because you’re settling, but because you’re choosing clarity, peace, and alignment over performance.

In this episode, we cover:

• Why “simple” doesn’t mean small, it can be sacred
• How doing more can become a way to prove worth (even spiritually)
• The cost of staying in survival mode and why slowing down helps your nervous system
• Why Jesus modeled rest, limits, and stepping away
• How to tell when something is taking more out of you than you realize
• Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God.”

Quick clarification: In the episode, we mention that Jesus “couldn’t” be present for everyone all the time. What we meant is that He didn’t. Yes, He could have spent all of His time teaching, healing, and doing miracles, but Scripture shows that He often withdrew to be alone and pray (Luke 5:16). He chose rest, and had limits in His earthly ministry, and that example matters.

Fuel for the Road Ahead:
Reflection questions:

1. What am I negotiating with myself about?
2. What feels unnecessarily heavy right now?

One small step: Pick one part of your day and slow your body down on purpose for 60 seconds. (Pause in the car, drop your shoulders, unclench your jaw, take one slow breath before you respond.)

New episodes drop every week.

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Stay tuned for ways to connect with us off the podcast and meet other listeners on the journey.

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Looking for Therapy?

Christalyn is a Licensed Professional Counselor in South Carolina. She offers faith-integrated therapy for women navigating burnout, boundaries, and emotional exhaustion.
→ carolinacounselingsc.com

Felicia is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker and Licensed Mental Health Therapist in Virginia, Georgia, and Texas,  She provides trauma-informed, somatic-based therapy for women ready to heal and reconnect with themselves.
→ soulguidedhealing...

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to the Trust in Her Journey Podcast. I'm Felicia.

SPEAKER_02 0:03

And I'm Crystaline.

SPEAKER_00 0:05

This podcast is a safe space for women who are caring a lot. Women who are trying to trust themselves again while managing the weight of their roles and responsibilities.

SPEAKER_02 0:15

We know what it's like to feel stretched thin because you're constantly showing up for everyone and putting your own needs last. Here we have honest conversations about the silent struggles many women face.

SPEAKER_00 0:27

We're so glad you're here. In every episode, we'll talk about the real challenges women navigate, whether it's juggling work and family, carving out time for yourself, or learning to trust your instincts again.

SPEAKER_02 0:40

You'll hear us share personal stories and lessons from our experience to help you trust your path and rethink what peace and balance actually looks like for you.

SPEAKER_00 0:50

Our goal is to guide you through the hard moments with honest conversations about boundaries, self-care, and leaning on your faith for strength.

SPEAKER_02 0:58

If you've been feeling overwhelmed, unseen, or unsure about how to care for yourself while caring for everyone else, you're in the right place.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Just a quick heads up: this podcast isn't a substitute for working with a licensed counselor or therapist. But don't worry, if you need that kind of support, we've got some resources for you in the show notes. Let's start the conversation. Hello everyone. Welcome back to Trust and Her Journey Podcast. This is season two, and we are so excited to be recording again. If you are a new listener, thank you so much for joining our podcast community family. If you are a returning listener, guest sister, family member from season one, thank you so much for staying on this journey with us, loving us and showing us so much support. You all do not know how much we appreciate it because this was once a conversation between two people that then turned into this podcast. So we just want to express our gratitude again. Thank you for tuning in. I am Felicia.

SPEAKER_02 2:21

And I'm Crystal and hey y'all, happy, happy, happy to be here to have this opportunity to be able to share all the things about trusting your journey. Thank you. Just thank you.

SPEAKER_00 2:34

Yes, yes. Happy new year, y'all. We are in 2026. And if you're feeling anything like me, I am so glad 2025 is over. I will hold on to those memories. I will hold on to the joy and the happiness that I felt in 2025. But I am just grateful to be in 2026 and I am looking forward to what it brings. With I'm not putting any expectations on it, I'm just looking forward to what 2026 brings. How are you feeling?

SPEAKER_02 3:10

Looking forward.

SPEAKER_00 3:13

Is that an emotion? Yeah, what we're gonna roll with it.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

That is how I'm feeling. I am looking forward to looking forward. I'm thankful for the opportunities to continue to grow. I am that much more resilient. Um, I have experienced a lot of not necessarily things that I will qualify as like bad, but just a lot of things I've learned so much more about me as a person, as a woman that I am glad to be able to carry with me into the new year. So yeah, I'm excited to be going forward.

SPEAKER_00 3:49

Yeah, no, I love that you brought that up because I feel like the last part of this year, so some would say like quarter four. I feel like I'm I learned so much about me, just where I'm at in life, what's happening, how I'm feeling. I think I am proud of the fact that I am really tuning into the message and the internal downloads that my body continues to share with me. And it kind of goes into what we're talking about today of letting life be simple. This is probably an episode that many may not expect because as we enter the new year, a lot of times we are talking about goals, new year's resolutions, what we want to do, making vision boards, making um, I think the latest thing over the past few years. What did I see on TikTok? The bingo cards. And while we're not dissing any of that by no means. So please, please hear us when we say that this. We're not dissing those things. It's just we know that this is the time of the year where we have those conversations where we try to do those things. And what we're living in our lives right now, what we're trying to live and what we're trying to learn about ourselves more is like it is okay to live a simple life. So we're going to talk about that a little bit more in detail. So this is probably not the podcast where the podcast episode where you will hear buckle down on your goals, write your goals. Like we want you to do whatever aligns with you, but that's not how we're starting off season two because we know that there is a lot of pressure to reset. There's a lot of pressure to figure things out, a lot of pressure to show up differently just because the date on the calendar changed, the year on the calendar changed. And honestly, a lot of us are entering this year already tired. We're exhausted. So this episode isn't here to motivate you in that way. It's not here to push you forward in a way of overworking or overproducing. That's not what we're trying to do. We're not here to tell you what you should be doing.

SPEAKER_02 6:26

I don't like the word should much. I've used it, but even using it, I it just applies so much pressure. Because who says so? Who says I should? And I definitely am a fan of starting the year out slow. So we wanted to start this podcast season two by naming something that's really simple but important. Number one, simple doesn't have to mean small, it can mean sacred. Letting life be simpler isn't like it doesn't mean you don't have ambition or that you're a quitter, that you're giving up, or that you're settling for less or lowering your standards, or any other things that the society would tell us are true. Like if it looks like you're not doing all the things, that doesn't mean that your life doesn't matter, that it's too small. It could be you honoring the sacred space that you are in, and not enough of us do that. And just because you don't record it and put it on socials, doesn't mean that it don't mean nothing. It don't have to mean anything. So many of us, because that's the opposite of how we live, choosing this path could be an act of, of course, faith and courage. It could be one of the most brave things that you could do starting out this year, just to kind of slow down, notice what's happening around you. So if you are listening while also doing something else, that's fine. Just take some notes, come back and listen again. This is not about trying to fix everything, this doesn't mean something's wrong with you or you're doing something bad. We're just offering you a new way to start your year. So let this episode meet you exactly where you are.

SPEAKER_00 8:12

Yes, I love that. So even just hearing that, how do you think we could actually, how would you define keeping life simple? Because you know, you talked about it not being Lauren Sanders or settling, and sometimes people actually hear that when they say, hey, just let life be simple. We go to a space where we're like, so I can't aspire for more, I can't dream for more. And it's like, no, that's not necessarily what we're saying. So how would you define that? Um, how would you say you could actually apply that in practice of choosing to keep life simple?

SPEAKER_02 8:54

Personally, for me, um, the simplicity of life looks like sometimes not adding something new, but just, you know, kind of working the current routine I have, taking out some of the king, seeing what I need to do more of, what I need to do less of, um, what I need to hire somebody else to do for me. You know. So that's sometimes for me, keeping it simple, that may also look like spending less. Um, it may look like sleeping more. It may look like planning a trip with my family because we hadn't had time to do or taken the time to do that. That might look like visiting my parents more or spending time with my siblings a little bit more, or being really intentional about seeing my friends that I had not seen in person in a while or ever. Instead of, you know, this really big project that I'm taking on. So, like maybe not taking on a lot of big projects, but keeping it simple by nurturing the relationships that I have. Even in my career, simplicity could look like I'm not gonna get um a new specialty. I'm not gonna advertise for new clients. I'm gonna work with the clients that I currently have. I'm gonna um hone in on the tools that I currently have and maybe work on mastering those and being much more effective as a clinician. It's not me settling, it's not me giving up, it's not me lowering my standards, it's choosing more clarity over the chaos that life can bring if I keep taking on more new things. It actually looks like me mastering the art that is my life in all my different roles, choosing peace over trying to feel like I gotta perform in yet another role. And for myself, and I'm hoping that some of the listeners can connect, it might also mean alignment over just like appearing that things are going a certain way. You know, I'm in alignment with what I know, or at least feel like I know God is telling me that I should do.

SPEAKER_00 11:04

Especially the piece around just alignment over appearance. Because a lot of times, as we mentioned earlier in the episode, we create these goals, we do these things, we track all of this movement in our lives because we are trying to have some visible evidence that we are doing the thing.

SPEAKER_02 11:26

Yes, because if it looks like you're not doing nothing, then you must not be doing nothing.

SPEAKER_00 11:30

Exactly. And and you know, if we have to be honest and say that a lot of us were taught indirectly or directly that the more that we do, we must be doing something right. So, like and right, girl. What you mean? You are faithful, like you are doing what God designed you to do, you are doing what you were placed on this earth to do. And I and I feel like because of that, we often want to overcomplicate our lives. So we're doing a lot just to feel like, okay, I'm faithful, I'm honoring my assignment, right? I'm showing up. And you know that subconsciously a lot of us feel like if we keep life simple or if we don't add anything new, if we don't add new goals, if we don't add anything to our routine, then that means you know, we're not lazy. Like if we do those things, we're lazy. If we keep life simple, we feel as if we're lazy. So the more that we do, the more that we feel like we are um disciplined or yeah, walking in obedience. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

SPEAKER_02 12:46

Yeah, but when you look at Jesus' time here on earth, that is not how he lived. He didn't heal everybody. We and he was not available all the time. He actually took time away to rest or to retreat. Uh he regularly did that. Even when people wanted more from you, you know, if I mean, he here, if he's on earth healing people, and you got a family member, a loved one who is struggling, you're gonna be like, all right, where he at? We're going to wherever he is. We're gonna stand in the longest of lines, and he just could not, it don't, right? And he just couldn't be present all the time for everybody. That tells me that rest, having limits, boundaries, that doesn't mean you don't have faith. That is all a part of the experience. It's all a part of knowing that, recognizing that if I don't take time away, if I don't just sit and be present in the life that I do have right now and take care of what I've been trusted with, then well, the consequences for some may be dire. So we have to really be intentional about even following that example. If y'all don't want to listen to us, consider that the example that Jesus set for us. Everyone cannot have access to all of you all of the time.

SPEAKER_01 14:08

Yeah, okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 14:10

Felicia, where but where do you think that comes from, right? Because I know it's common. I know that some people are listening and they're like, well, but this is just how I am. This is how it's always been. Where do you think the idea of doing more means that you're doing it right?

SPEAKER_00 14:27

Uh, you know, that comes from, I feel like it can come from so many different places culturally. We have always been taught that, you know, we have to do more to prove that we're worthy. We have to do more to prove that we deserve to be in this space. Um, we have to do more. I think even when we think about it from a spiritual context, a lot of people often say, like, you know, you aren't stewarding the gifts that God gave you. You aren't doing enough of what you were blessed with. And so it puts this extra push in us, like, well, I gotta make sure that I show God I'm not mishandling the gifts that He, you know, He provided for me. I have to make sure that I'm showing up in a way, again, as you mentioned, being faithful. I I think as women, we have always been taught through generations that there is no reason for you to sit down. Like you have to complicate your life. You have to complicate your life to support the narrative that women can handle it all, women can do it all. So, because of that, and and I would be lying if I didn't say I operated in that same way, you know, like me too. I'm not I'm not delivered a hundred percent, but listen, I'm working on it, but it's the truth. Like it's I'm being honest in a space of like we we do feel like we have to do these things or we're not getting life right, we're failing, we're not enough. And those are just internal messages that have been passed down from people, from environments, from books. I mean, think about it. We're seeing all of this stuff on social media now. Like in in November, people are cueing you up for January. They are, they are the winter arc. This is what you should be doing, this is how you should be operating. And it's just additional pressure to get it right, to make sure that we are showing up in a way, you know, that people can be proud of, not even what we're proud of, what others can feel proud more about.

SPEAKER_02 16:47

So then tell us then, honestly, the idea of slowing down and keeping things simple, is that helping you feel calm or does that make you uncomfortable?

SPEAKER_00 16:57

A little bit of both, honestly. I would say I I don't want to say 50-50, but I'll say like 40%. I'm like, okay, that feels I can I can do that. Like I can actually slow down and keep life simple. The other 60%, I'm like, okay, so then what does that look like? Uh in what areas do you want me to keep life simple? Right. Still the moment of just like, I feel uncomfortable, but I also feel a sense of relief in myself saying, like, it is okay to make things simple. Like there, you're placing unrealistic expectations on yourself to keep moving at this pace for the next amount of years that you are entitled to live on this earth, you know? Yeah. I I don't want to keep moving at the pace that I have been in previous years. So I'm uncomfortable, but it doesn't mean that I'm willing to not keep it simple just because I'm like you're still willing to try. Yeah, I'm willing to try. I don't know how far I'm gonna make it just yet, but I'm willing to try.

SPEAKER_02 18:09

But Clarity does feel uncomfortable at first. So I think like when we have a lot of goals, a lot of expectations, a lot of the shoulds that I I already said I don't like, all of this, negotiating with yourself. Should I do this? Should I start this business? Should I end this relationship? Should I save this amount of money? All of the things that's what's happening to us internally. It happens to all of us. It's natural, it doesn't mean anything is wrong with us. Um, so we hesitate. And hesitation doesn't have to be bad though. So maybe I'll say pause. Yeah. So that you can have more clarity about the next thing that you start, or it's just so that you can enjoy this part. And and enjoying a part of your life doesn't have to mean like you're having a big celebration, but you also don't want to miss it. You don't want to just go from one thing to the next thing to the next thing, and you didn't take time to let the things that you and we talked about this before in season one, right? The new things that you've learned or even the experiences that you had, you don't want to move on to the next thing so quickly that you can't embrace it. I know last year y'all went to Disney, right? Yes. What if you had spent the whole time trying to record the entire experience? No, this is no offense against people who record their experiences for socials. It's not, I ain't talking about y'all, but I mean those of us who struggle with actually being present because you want to capture all the memories.

SPEAKER_00 19:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 19:42

What if you would you would have missed it?

SPEAKER_00 19:45

Yeah. No, that that is so true. And you know, it even goes back to at first uh bringing up the whole Disney part. I was uh feeling very stressed out and anxious around, like, okay. This is her first trip to Disney. This is a milestone birthday for her. I want to make sure that we do this, this, this. I want to make sure, you know, I kept thinking, like, let me create this jam-packed schedule so we could really soak in everything. But when I got there, like, yes, we did a lot of the things that we wanted to do. And those simple moments. Watching her, like, I go back and I watch this video on my phone where she was like eating pizza and watching this performance, the excitement, the happiness, it was just like sometimes simple. It's okay. I do not have to go over the top or create this production or this, you know, elaborate plan. Yeah. It's okay. And just because I didn't plan the way the other people plan, or I didn't sit down and write out all these goals and all of these things, I'm still good. I didn't do anything wrong in that experience because she still talks about it. So it was uncomfortable for me to release not planning things and not having a set agenda. It was uncomfortable, but it was also like I did not fail at all by easing up and keeping things simple. I think I actually made this so much better.

SPEAKER_02 21:23

You did. So clarity comes sometimes before it's uncomfortable at first, but now you feel free. You have this type of freedom that you cannot put a price tag on. So what I guess what I'm hoping that the listeners are taking from this when I say clarity often feels uncomfortable before it feels freeing. If you know that there's a part of your life where you keep showing up and you're trying to control every little detail, every moment, you just might miss it. You might miss what it is you were supposed to receive through that experience or through the encounter that you may be having with the person or a situation. And I think for a lot of us, once we can recognize that and we can simplify our lives, this year will be so much more better. Christmas time, we wore our same pajamas that we wore last Christmas. Yeah, no shame in that at all. On the tripod furniture, and we took a photo, the same pajamas. And guess who it's okay that the same the picture from 2026 2025 Christmas will look like 2024 Christmas. Yeah. That's okay that they're the same.

SPEAKER_00 22:40

Yeah. No, that is so real. And and less pressure, girl. I need to take that advice because I'll be doing a lot with these Christmas pictures, and I know my family be like, girl, sit down.

SPEAKER_02 22:50

Well, and so there's that's the thing. So if your family is on board and it's something that you enjoy doing to create memories and all the things, by all means, do a new photo shoot every year. If it's in your budget and it's not adding stress to it, but the condition needs to be why are you doing it?

SPEAKER_00 23:12

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 23:12

No, that is why is this important to you? Why?

SPEAKER_00 23:17

Yeah. And it's more aligned with you versus again, alignment over appearance. I think it goes back to that. What aligns with you, your family, your values, your schedule, finance, and budget, and all of that versus what are we seeing online that we're like, we have to do that because everyone else is taking Christmas photos or they're going on the big vacation? I like that you kind of tied that back up. So, one thing that I think could be helpful for the listeners, just something to kind of ponder on, think about again. You can pause it, pause the episode, think about this and come back to it, or you can write it down if you want to. But what's one thing that keeps taking more out of you than you realize?

SPEAKER_02 24:07

Yeah. Yeah, that's good.

SPEAKER_00 24:10

I think that's even a question for us to kind of sit with. We have conversations all the time about what we're trying to release or no longer take on, but this is something that is so helpful for you all to think through. Like, what is one thing that keeps taking more out of you than you actually realize? And it's, I feel like this is an interesting reflection question because I know I'm not alone when I say this. You probably pose this question to your clients as well. Like, you probably bring this up like, what's one thing that you know you no longer align with that you want to release or it's taken a lot out of you? And that brings us to a space of like what we see in the work that we do. A lot of times people come to us and say things like, I feel like I'm lacking discipline. I feel like I'm lacking motivation. And granted, I know we all sometimes lack a little bit of discipline. I can speak for myself. There are times, sometimes, sometimes. Yeah. There are times where I lack motivation to do things in my life, but today we are not having this conversation um rooted in whether you have enough discipline or motivation. That's a conversation for a different day. We can we can talk about that more in a different way. What we're actually talking about is how keeping life simple can actually help your nervous system. We're talking about the nervous system and how I would say dysregulated it is when we are choosing chaos, when we are trying to do all of the things, when we are starting the year on 20, when our tank is on E. There is nothing left in there, and we're trying to move at a at a fast pace.

SPEAKER_02 26:20

Yeah, because a lot of people, let's be honest, they didn't listen to us when we said at the end of the year, hey y'all, chill out, slow down, take one thing off your plate, you know, ease into the holiday season, less is more, all of those, you know, and and we're not, I know we're not the only people talking about it. Um we I I think it's important that we say it a little louder. When your body has been under stress for a long time, emotionally, mentally, spiritually, it takes time to move out of that kind of survival mode. When you're in survival mode for a long time, your body is not focused on clarity, it's not focused on making no long-term decisions, it's not focused on being less impulsive, it is not focused on any of it, it's trying to get through. We have to survive this. So yeah, you're gonna be more irritable. You may, whatever your version of crash out is, that's where you likely are. But that's what so that's why pushing through things, it doesn't help. It's not helpful to always try to force yourself to push through things. And I'm not saying that resilience isn't important because the truth is some of us do struggle the way we do because we aren't resilient or as resilient as we could be. So that's again, that's another conversation for another day. What this conversation is when you are in survival and you're going, going, going, going, going, and your tank is on E, as Felicia mentioned, you can't think clearly when your body feels like it has to constantly stay on alert. How do you know you're constantly on alert? Well, you may have some ringing in your ears, you may have some pains in your neck or back or shoulders. You may struggle to sleep, you may have picked up some habits that picked up some habits again that you thought you had sat down. You may be more irritable. There's a lot of ways, and we can talk about that too, to know that okay, yeah, I'm in I'm on alert too much. I'm keyed up too much. I'm feeling some type of way, as the young people say. Right? So slowing down is necessary. It's actually necessary. It's really important for us to slow down. It doesn't mean you have to quit. It's just a moment, giving your body a moment to reset. So slowing things down, slowing things down, going at your own pace, um, slowing down your schedule, your expectations so that your system can get calm enough to see what's really happening, to notice what's going on. So then once that happens, you can move forward with ease. You can think a little bit more clearly, you'll be less impulsive, you'll be less irrational, you'll be less irritable and frustrated. Your family and friends will thank you. Yeah. Well, thank us. Yeah. Because once that happens, then things can go forward a little bit more easily. Not because you kept pushing yourself through, but because your body finally felt safe enough to cooperate and do what it was designed to do.

SPEAKER_00 29:20

Yes. And that's why, you know, simplicity isn't about just doing less. Ultimately, what we are encouraging you all to do is to reconnect with yourself, to build a connection that fit is filled with alignment, but it's also more attuned with what you want moving forward. You cannot create goals from a space. Well, I'll say you cannot create goals when you are not connected to yourself because the goals will never align with you. You'll just be creating something just to create, to say that you did it. When you slow down and make life simple, you actually take better care of yourself. You clear out some of that brain fog that you're probably showing up with. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 30:11

So you can hear from God so that you can set goals for yourself and for your family. And yes. Yes. But sometimes it's too loud, it's too foggy.

SPEAKER_00 30:22

It's too foggy. You sleep better. Yes, you do. You sleep better. You sleep, yeah. Your your mind is not moving a thousand miles per hour. I mean, I I can even say that learning how to slow down has helped me so much because I no longer have the headaches that I I mean they come every now and then, but slowing down again, going back to what I said earlier in the conversation, I have learned things about myself and my body that I never paid attention to before.

SPEAKER_02 30:58

Yeah. So going, going, going.

SPEAKER_00 31:01

Yes, I was just going. As you mentioned, I was in survival mode, and being in survival mode for a long time is never a good thing. Trust me.

SPEAKER_02 31:12

No, it's not sustainable.

SPEAKER_00 31:14

It's not. You will crash, you will have the great crash out of 2026 if you don't slow down. So we're we're encouraging you to not just do less, but learn how to reconnect with yourself in a healthier way that feels more aligned to you.

SPEAKER_02 31:33

Yeah. I read um, it wasn't a statistic. Well, maybe it was, but it was in the book called Burnout. It's like I think it's actually called Burnout, Burnout, Burnout. But in the book, the author describes how much pressure our hearts can take, literally. And the example she gives is that the amount of pressure that our hearts was were created to be able to withstand is like water running from a faucet, just like when you're washing your hands. Not too hard, you know, just mild. However, when we are experiencing chronic stress, that is as if someone is holding a fire hose on your heart. And so, no, not all hypertension is because you eat too many salty foods. Yeah. It's literally only so much your body can take. No, we're not saying there's anything wrong with us or you all listening. That's not what we're saying. And if this sounds scary, I guess in some ways, let this be us like kind of sounding the alarm a little bit. We know that these are ways that we our bodies have naturally adapted to respond to the stress that we have been experiencing. Your body has literally been trying to protect you, but it can only do so much. We have to do our part. We have to do our part. And so when I think about what happens when I talk to women who keep trying, they know something is wrong, like you said, like these headaches, the muscle aches, the inability to sleep, like they know something is wrong, but they keep pushing themselves. So they become disconnected from their bodies, their needs, and eventually it's like they they're not even recognizable. So many times I get clients and they're like, I don't even know who I am anymore. I don't recognize myself. I can't believe I let it go this far. And they don't collapse all at once, meaning like they're not in the hospital. Yeah. This is in these women in the hospital. Yeah. And they're not texting you and saying, sis, pray for me. Yeah. They're getting it all done from the outside looking in, right? They're showing up. Um, and then what happens is over time, they take a little bit longer to reply to the text messages. They start canceling the lunches. Or when you do talk to them, they're not as patient. And everything is a blanket, oh, I'm fine, I'm good.

SPEAKER_00 34:01

Yeah. And that's because they can't even identify what they're feeling. So it does go back to I'm fine, I'm good, because they cannot actually share what they're feeling. A lot of times what I hear is I feel numb. I don't know what to feel, I don't know what to think.

SPEAKER_02 34:18

Yeah, yeah. So then what do you think is underneath that? Resentment, some sadness. I, the women in my life who I know struggle and won't say anything about struggling, I can feel, I can feel the sadness when I talk with them, the exhaustion, yeah. Um, and some unfortunately the despair. I can feel that for them. So the thing I know to do is to pray. That's the thing I know to do, that God will give them what they need or send someone if it's because it don't have to be me, but to send someone to pour into them to help them to see you need to rest. Or you need to go see your doctor and get some written approval to take some days off. Y'all use your peak so use the MLA.

SPEAKER_00 35:08

I don't know what y'all holding that PTO for because a lot of times you say, I'm gonna save this for a vacation later this year, and you never take the vacation. So I listen, I am very big on telling clients, take the PTO. What long weekend do you have coming up? Take some extended days off. Like you, the benefits that you have at work, you earn them. They're not giving them to you. You earn them. Take your time off. Yeah, you just yeah, let's let's we will be on this topic for forever. I mean, we are very passionate about that. Like, actually take time for yourself, take care of yourself. Do not, I'm not gonna say, don't kill yourself for those people. Listen, they're not worth it whatsoever. Take the FMLA, take the PTO, take the short-term disability, whatever you need to do, use it.

SPEAKER_02 36:13

Yes, pushing doesn't make us stronger, y'all. Let me let me be clear. Now, I know you were gym girly, Felicia, right? So I know in some aspects, yes, pushing yourself does literally make you stronger.

SPEAKER_00 36:26

But that's for season for time, not all the time, it's not heavy lifting every single day, every single week. It's seasoned, yes.

SPEAKER_02 36:40

Yep. Because if you keep pushing yourself beyond what you are capable over time, the cost is more than you even recognize. Yes, and it's not worth it. The the very people that you say you're doing all the things for, they don't benefit from someone who is constantly overdoing it, not pausing. So, yes, simplify your life this year. Decide what you want to do less of, and consider even if you decide to do something, do more of something, let it be more of something that is going to replenish you.

SPEAKER_00 37:16

Yes, that is filled with joy.

SPEAKER_02 37:20

Yeah. Well, and you know, I think a lot of times people have moments, more moments of joy in their life than they even recognize. They miss it. Maybe that's what I'm trying to say. Yeah, we miss a lot, we miss a lot of it because we are busying ourselves with things that are not, they're just not necessary. Yeah, yeah. So, yeah. Um, Psalms 46 and 10. Be still and know that I am God. Be still and know that I am God. So as we get ready to wrap up our episode, I want us to kind of slow down for a minute. Um, if you're listening, if you're safe, kind of let your shoulders drop a little bit. Maybe uncleanse your jaw. I know y'all feel like Felicia and I just read all y'all right. Please still love us. We still love you all. Yes. Take a slow breath. Maybe imagine that you're smelling your favorite candle when you take your inhale and on your exhale, blow out like you're blowing out the dandelion flowers that we used to blow out when I was a kid. That was one of my favorite things to do. Scripture says to be still and know that I am God. This verse is not like do better or else. It's our invitation to stop striving, stop being on this hamster wheel long enough to recognize who is holding you, who's got your back, who's gonna make sure that all of your needs are provided for. If God makes sure the birds have what they want and need, what more would he do for us, his children? God needs us in this season. Consider if you don't do nothing else to release one thing that you know you should put down or at least ask for help with. If you don't want to put it down totally, ask God, give me what I need or send who I need to help me to carry this thing. Help me to trust you more, God. Help me to simplify my life, help me to make a shift in a way that looks like I can the thing that is coming, because we don't know what the next season is gonna be like, but I'm gonna have what I need to move into and through this next season. Help me to listen, help me to not try to rush and fix everything. Y'all, we not know none of us are perfect. That's not even what we are striving for.

SPEAKER_00 39:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 39:49

But I also know that a lot of us struggle with always looking for something about us to fix. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Yep. And I don't know about y'all, but I don't want to do that no more. No. I'm just tired of doing that. Yeah. The heart you've already done a lot of hard work. Let some of that marinate for a little while. Yep. That's all I have to say about that, Felicia. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 40:14

Well, a lot was said, although you said that's all you had to say. That's a lot to sit with, marinate on, and process. Okay. But as you all know, um, if you are a returning listener, you know we do our fuel for the road ahead. It's just a moment of reflection. If you are new to the podcast, this is something where we provide you all with just like something to reflect on. You can journal it out. You can share your response with us in the comments because you know that we are now on YouTube. So you can watch the full episode on YouTube as well. So drop in the comments a response to your question. But we are going to leave you with two questions this week, okay? We wrote out three, but I'm gonna pick one and then I'm gonna allow Crystaln to pick the one that she chooses, okay? So again, what am I negotiating with myself about? I really want you to sit down and process what you are negotiating with yourself about. What thing, what things, what places, whatever it is. You can identify one. Now listen, if you want to do more, cool, but we're again, we're keeping things simple. So let's just choose one thing to focus on.

SPEAKER_02 41:40

Yeah. Um, I think I'll go back to what I was mentioning before. What feels heavy, unnecessarily heavy right now? Yeah. What's one thing that feels unnecessarily heavy? And when you give yourself a minute to pause and think about it, you know what it is. It's the thing you're thinking about right now.

SPEAKER_00 42:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 42:02

While you're listening to my voice, it's that yes, it's that thing. That's the thing that's heavy, and that's the thing I want to challenge you to pray and ask God to lighten the load a little bit. Help me to trust you more with this thing.

SPEAKER_00 42:19

Yeah. Now, what we do want to want to remind you all, please just sit with one question at a time, okay? When you are processing this, again, we're not looking for you to solve it right away. We just want you to notice what comes up for you. That is it.

SPEAKER_02 42:38

And don't judge your um reaction to what's what we're talking about or your response. Judgment will sound like this is what you'd be telling yourself or saying to yourself, now you know you should be over that by now. What's wrong with you? Now you know what you're doing.

SPEAKER_00 42:52

Why you still talk about that?

SPEAKER_02 42:54

Yes, why are you still on that? You should just that's judgment. Yeah, and it's not even how you would talk to your closest friend or someone you care about. So talk to yourself, practice talking to yourself with care, with kindness, and regard yourself in a way that looks like I know that I'm struggling with something, and I look forward to when I'm on the other side of this. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 43:19

All right. So the one small step that we want you all to take with you for this week is we want you to pick a part of your day where you slow your body down on purpose. Catch that on purpose, okay? So we want you to take intentional time. We're only asking you for 60 seconds minimum. That's a minute. One minute, one minute. One minute, okay. That can look like pausing before getting out of the car, breathing before you respond. You gave us a great example of how we can do a moment of deep breath of intentional breathing. You can actually stop when your body says stop. Not I can go five minutes longer, I can stay up another hour. No, we just want you to pick one thing this week. Oh, well, we want you to pick one part of your day. I'm sorry. Take one minute and do one of those things. We provided you with examples. You can choose whichever example aligns with you again, but we just want you to think about 60 seconds out of my day. What is one thing I can do to actually slow my body down?

SPEAKER_02 44:36

Yeah, I'm thinking about mine right now.

SPEAKER_00 44:40

Girl, you went to a different place. What happened? I sure did.

SPEAKER_02 44:44

I sure did. Because I want to live a long time. And I want to enjoy all the parts of my life. I know that stressors are going to come. I know challenges are going to come, and I want to have what I need to be able to go through those difficult times. Yeah. So for now, while things are good, I'm going to enjoy. I'm going to enjoy slowing things down, simplifying my yes, I love that.

SPEAKER_00 45:13

And remember, this isn't about being productive and how we're showing up. This is all about again regulating our nervous system. And that counts more than any hack you can show up with to feel productive, to feel disciplined, to feel motivated. We're really in a season of regulating our nervous system and stepping outside of survival mode. And that brings us to a space of living a simple life.

SPEAKER_02 45:44

Yes, yes. Thank y'all so much for listening. Please share this with somebody you love. Don't forget to like and subscribe to us on YouTube and make sure you visit trustingherjourney.com so that you can get on our email list because we send some great nuggets out to you all between the episodes.

SPEAKER_00 46:05

Yes. All right, y'all. We will talk to you soon. Bye.