Episode 16 - Part 1: The Truth Behind The Message (Anthony's Story)

Welcome back to the Prime Parent Podcast.

Today’s episode is a little different.

You guys have heard us talk about health, discipline, parenting, burnout, consistency, mindset… all the things we’re passionate about. But we realized something…

We’ve never fully told you WHY these conversations matter so much to us.

So for the next two episodes, we’re flipping the script.

This episode is all about Anthony’s story.

The experiences that shaped him.
The struggles people probably never saw.
The pressure, the setbacks, the lessons, the moments that changed him… and the mission behind why he cares so deeply about helping people now.

Honestly, this might be one of the most uncomfortable conversations we’ve recorded…
but probably one of the most important.

Because behind every message is a story.

And today, we’re telling it.

Transcript

SPEAKER_04 0:00

Welcome back to the Prime Para podcast. Today's episode is a little different. You guys have heard us talk about health, discipline, parenting, burnout, consistency, mindset, all the things we're passionate about. But we realize something. We've never fully told you why these conversations matter so much to us. So for the next two episodes, we're flipping the script. This episode is all about Anthony's story. The experiences that shaped him, the struggles people probably never saw, the pressure, the setbacks, the lessons, the moments that changed him, and the mission behind why he cares so deeply about helping people now. Honestly, this might be one of the most uncomfortable conversations we've recorded, but probably one of the most important. Because behind every message is a story, and today we're telling it. Episode 16, Prime Parent Podcast. What's going on, brother? How are you?

SPEAKER_01 1:00

Johnny boy, another beautiful Friday, kid.

SPEAKER_04 1:02

Beautiful Friday out here. Nice and sunny. We got the cutoffs on right now. I was just gonna hit you, bro. I knew you were gonna come in. We know the weather's nice.

SPEAKER_01 1:11

Johnny Fouchetta's got the pipes hanging out, bro. Smiling like that. Someday I'll get the biceps like that, kid.

SPEAKER_04 1:17

We'll get some bicep working this week together. Maybe we'll meet up besides just in here, you know. Maybe we'll get together for a workout.

SPEAKER_01 1:23

Sooner or later, man.

SPEAKER_04 1:24

Yeah, we'll get there.

SPEAKER_01 1:26

But uh, yeah, I mean, listen, happy to be back. It's been a while.

SPEAKER_04 1:30

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 1:31

Um and uh, you know, every day, every time we're about to shoot, man, or have a podcast episode, it's uh the day, the day I'm excited for really to get to this point. Um today, you know, I think we're gonna uh switch it up on everybody. Normally we we jump into you know these uh systems and things that we do. Um we're gonna dive into a little bit of our stories today.

SPEAKER_04 1:56

Yeah, and I think that's gonna be gonna be fun for us. We're gonna we talked a little bit about this episode one, you know, but we wanted to really dive deep a little bit, go way back, and really dig a little bit on each other. And I think we haven't had a chance to do that. And um, you know, I think it's gonna be a fun one. We're gonna go way back, you know, right from when we grew up and today, specifically this one, we're gonna be diving into Anthony here, right? Oh boy, oh boy. You ready for this?

SPEAKER_01 2:21

I'm gonna be honest, because I was driving, I was driving over, I'm excited. Yeah, but uh, you know, I was thinking about it, like I'm a little nervous in a sense of like the same way, yeah. I I I tell I I haven't spoken about like my my past to to a large scale. It's always been like, you know, to a client to just kind of give them that relatability piece to to make them feel like that um they're not alone, yes, kind of thing. And this is what we were talking about yesterday, is like the relatability is such a important piece in the business that we're in that to just to get people to to know that they're not alone. Yeah. So, you know, when I was thinking about it, like, dude, I'm a little I'm a little nervous because I I've never really told my my full story you know out loud to to an audience before.

SPEAKER_04 3:07

So And I was too. I was on the way down, like, wait, I gotta interview Ant kind of, you know, and then and then I gotta shift it on me later. And it's kind of like I was a little more nervous for this episode than any of the other ones.

SPEAKER_01 3:19

I don't know why, but yeah, one one thing you gotta know is when I get going, you gotta know when to stop me.

SPEAKER_04 3:24

Yeah, so I'm gonna try to keep Ant in control here. I'll do my best as we go along, all right? But no, we'll have some fun, we'll dig a little bit, I'll push some buttons on this guy, he'll push me back and we'll see what we got. So, Ant, anyway, what do you want to start with here, man? I mean, we're gonna go from the beginning, childhood, bro. You know, who were you before, you know, Delficco? You know, who were you before Prime Parent Podcast? What kind of kid were you growing up? Like, you know, let's go way back, bro. Yeah, man.

SPEAKER_01 3:51

We're digging, we're digging. Yeah, so um, you know, just growing up, I was uh we're just talking, we were talking about it a little bit. Just this, you know, kid that had a bowl of energy, couldn't sit still. Um, it still can't. I see you with my son. We were sitting there the other day, and my wife was like, Giacomo, what is up with you? It's 8 30 at night. The kid played two doubleheaders on Saturday for for baseball, 9 and 11, then had two football games in the afternoon, running all day, comes home at 8 o'clock at night. He's still running around with a basketball in his hand now in the house. So, like, I'm like sitting on a couch and I'm like, this fuck, this kid is me, bro. Yeah, he's still going.

SPEAKER_04 4:31

Wow, that's that's amazing though.

SPEAKER_00 4:34

You see a lot in that then.

SPEAKER_01 4:35

I see a lot, man. And it was just uh, you know, a lot of energy, always involved in sports, fitness. Um but uh you know, again, just it was a uh a struggle because I don't, you know, like everybody says that we got diagnosed with ADHD and whatnot. Like as a kid, bro, I just couldn't sit still.

SPEAKER_04 4:53

Was that something for you though? Like, I don't know a lot about that to be honest. But like when you were a kid, was that like were they like, oh, this kid's got ADHD?

SPEAKER_01 5:00

Or you were, you know, I mean, I don't think it was something that was ever like spoken about.

SPEAKER_04 5:04

Okay. Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 5:06

Like, dude, I couldn't. I couldn't. Like my I'll never forget when we were on vacations or things, um, you know, Christmas breaks or summers, I'd be at my boy's house at like nine o'clock, banging on the window. You were Greg Anderson, you're listening. Okay, his mom would be like, Oh, Anthony's here again, bro.

SPEAKER_04 5:22

You know, so like yeah, it was it was And for you though, it was you you just wanted to play sports, you wanted to move around. You wanted, yeah, anything you could do, get out of the house, move around. Yep. And it's so funny because like, I mean, ever since I've known you, since you know, we met obviously through the gym, it transformed way back, but you were like the same exact person then, same exact person now. Like nothing has changed at all. Still you slowing down or are you still taking it baby? We don't slow down here. That's right.

SPEAKER_01 5:50

It's just what we know, man. And um, you know, so that was that. It was just a kid that was very, you know, into sports, athletic fit fitness. I got introduced at a younger age, um, you know, into the weight room and things of that nature. Um, you know, but again, one thing that was a struggle would be, you know, just the ability to like fo focus in on stuff. Focus on stuff. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 6:12

Now, did you feel that like in school or in other things you were doing besides just, you know, obviously you're doing more stuff than just playing fucking sports and whatever. Like, did you feel like it was hard to really lock into stuff like school and things like that? School was tough. School was stuff for me. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 6:25

Um, I had to, you know, if it weren't for my father with with the threatening of the uh the 85 or don't come home kind of shit. Well, is that what it was? It was it was an 85, but then the 85 became a 90 and whatnot.

SPEAKER_04 6:37

Um so he was hard on you with that.

SPEAKER_01 6:38

Yeah, they were they were hard. They you know, they had they pushed. Nothing, you know. I I I talked about it. My my boy Greg, like he was one of my best friends in high school.

SPEAKER_00 6:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 6:47

The the kid just didn't even have to pay attention and would take the f take the test for like in the 90s and hundreds. Yeah. I was somebody that just had I had to really, really work just to A, stay focused to get the work done, you know, procrastinating, worried about X, you know, doing all these other things. So it was a it was a struggle. I wasn't the best at school. Yeah. Um, I got by, I did real well. It was because I, you know, that pressure that I I didn't really have much of an option.

SPEAKER_04 7:13

So my question that was gonna be my question was did you feel a pressure to to perform there, or did you feel like it was more like you were just like whatever, you know, skate and buy kind of thing?

SPEAKER_01 7:22

Yeah, I mean, listen, I I've we might have spoken about this in like previous episodes of like my dad.

SPEAKER_04 7:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 7:30

Um there was always pressure, you know, as a kid. Um and I don't want to get into too far ahead because we're gonna die uh obviously talk about that, but there was always pressure to to do above and beyond. Always, you know, get the the high grades, always perform, you know, whether it be in sports, um, you know, so that that pressure was real. And um, you know, it it put me, you know, in a position always doing something, worried about the outcome as a fo as opposed to actually focusing on the task at hand, right? You know, like oh, I gotta get an 85 or my dad's gonna do this. If I don't get a base hit, this that bad, I gotta worry about my pops screaming at me, right? Um you know, so there was a lot of pressure. Um, you know, and it it did, you know, we'll talk about it, how it it it definitely um affected me as I, you know, grew up.

SPEAKER_04 8:22

Yeah, I mean, we're gonna get into a lot of that for sure, especially even, you know, as a parent today, how you parent now or how did that change things for you? I mean, we'll we'll get there and touch on some of that stuff. But I feel like we can still say it now, you know, what's something like I guess from your childhood that affects kind of how you're parenting today? Like, did that have a big effect on you based on what you're doing now with your kids?

SPEAKER_01 8:42

Yeah, 100%.

SPEAKER_04 8:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:44

Um, I think if there's one thing that I focus on right now with my children, is how I speak to them and the words um that I use. Okay. Um, you know, I know we were sitting speaking last night, and I was actually getting a little upset with my son because I was like, yeah. But there's always a banter with you guys while we're on the phone. Prime example. Yeah. Giacomo just had a surgery on Tuesday for being tongue-tied. Okay. They removed uh a decent amount of the tissue under his tongue. Granted, it's Friday, it's a couple days. He's there is discomfort. He is being very uh soft about it. Put it this way. Okay You know, like he's not in a lot of pain. It's very discomforting, uh uncomfortable. Food sticks under his tongue, he doesn't know how to use his tongue properly to get the food out. Yeah, he hasn't eaten a lot in a couple days, probably. And he's been at home. Yeah. So there's a lot of factors that are playing into it.

SPEAKER_00 9:47

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 9:47

Um, and I caught myself this morning, like trying to get him out of the house. I told him that today is the day he has to go to school. There's no questions about it, because he's got to start going through the motions. And I know my son that if he's stimulated and with his friends and doing work, he's not thinking about it because his mind is getting him. So as I'm putting a uh a bowl of yogurt on the table, there's nothing in the yogurt, bro. I put some protein powder and it's just straight. Just suck the yogurt down, dude.

SPEAKER_04 10:15

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:16

He's crying.

SPEAKER_04 10:17

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 10:17

Um he can't eat, he don't feel well. Dude, it took him 25 minutes to maybe have five spoonfuls of yogurt, and now I'm like, I don't want to leave the house until I know he's had enough because I know he's going to school today. You don't want to get a few more than a lot of things. And if he doesn't eat any here, he's not gonna really eat, you know, at school. So I'm finding myself getting very upset, and I'm like, yo, dude, your dad would sit here and excuse my language, don't be a pussy, eat your food, bro. Cut it out, cut the bullshit. Like these are the these are the words, you know, that I would have gotten. And I caught myself and I'm like sitting here and Giacomo, like, daddy understands. Like, I know what you're going through. I'm not saying you're not dealing with pain. I I get it, but uh, this is just something you have to do. Like you have to try to eat. Right. So I was very conscious of the words I was using because I know the impact at a young age, how that type of tone, not that my dad was like a terrible father, no, but how that those words and that pressure um played an impact on me.

SPEAKER_04 11:21

For sure.

SPEAKER_01 11:21

You know, growing up.

SPEAKER_04 11:22

Yeah. And that's amazing that you're you're actually having those realizations. Like some people don't. They just take what they've had and bam, you know.

SPEAKER_01 11:28

You know, like when we we'll talk about it, dude. I went through some real tough times, bro. You know, like right about when you and I met uh at Transform, those will like I said, we'll speak on this. Those were probably my fuck my darker days, bro. Okay. Yeah. Um nobody would.

SPEAKER_04 11:45

That was what?

SPEAKER_01 11:46

Uh we're going 15 years ago. Yeah, it's gotta be, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 11:50

20, you know, 13, 14, yeah, something like that. 11, 12. Yeah, maybe 11. Okay. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 11:55

And you know, again, those were the darker years of my life. Okay. And where was I going with this? Now you made me lose my trend of throat here. Johnny Bates. No, but yeah, you're talking about Giacomo and, you know, yeah, so again, those are those were my darker years of my life. And you know, at that time, I was I was speaking to somebody, and that was one of the big things that we dove into because I had a problem of like letting that go for my pastor, my father. Um and the words that came out of his mouth were like, you should be thankful. You should be grateful that you you're you had that relationship with your father, and you're aware to know that now when you become a father, that you are gonna take what he did and build and you know, be be that much better with it, right? So it was it was something that ate at me. Okay, because I I felt like my father did me dirty, right? Not knowing, right? Yeah, but it was just something that I had to learn to get by. And now that I'm aware, like I use those skills, so but it was something that I couldn't let go for a long time.

SPEAKER_04 13:01

I can't imagine, bro. I mean, because how old were you then? Like that's that's a long time, no? If you're 20, 12, how old were you?

SPEAKER_01 13:06

Like, you know, it was it's I mean, it was something again that that built up along the way. The prey not necessarily, you know, like when you move when you get a little bit older and you move out and you're not living with your parents. Even those, you know, those habits, though they they they compound and you you deal with it and you you know you put that pressure on yourself in other areas such as business, relationships, finances. Yeah, and then you get married to that that mindset.

SPEAKER_04 13:33

Of course, you know, so well that's it, but again, that realization I think is like the most important thing. And I think any good parent can say that about themselves. Like you have those realization moments. Well, it's amazing. That's great. Yeah. And now that you have your daughter, I feel like you're like you kind of maybe even have another soft delay there somewhere in there, right? Yeah, yeah. I'm sure that changed you a little bit.

SPEAKER_01 13:53

All the parents out there, if you could like listen to this episode and tap in and and for any of the dads at least, maybe I don't know about the mothers, but my son, you know, was my my right-hand man. He would never leave my side. That's my dog, bro.

SPEAKER_04 14:08

But he's there all the time. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:09

There was something about having a daughter that you look and it just melts you differently. Melts you, right? Differently, though.

SPEAKER_04 14:17

Like I feel that you have a son, I can't like compare yet, you know, but like I can say I'm melting every day, man. I'm melting every day.

SPEAKER_01 14:24

When she says, I'm sorry, daddy, bro, I'm like, man.

SPEAKER_04 14:29

What are you supposed to do, right? You got nothing. You're right. No problem. Let's move on. All right. Giacomo's getting the back. Poor guy. Got his tongue freaking cut out here, and he's, you know, getting shit. No, kid. But yeah, I mean, that's amazing. Good realizations. And now there's something that I truly don't know. Like a lot of your life that I want to like dive into too. Like, from I really, again, I only know you from Transform On. That's like your business days, working days, and whatever. You know, you're just having a kid. I don't really know you, like, just from your childhood now till your college years. Like, uh, talk to me a little bit about that. Like, how did you even get into training? How did you become a teacher? Did you know you wanted to do that? Like, did some of the stuff from your childhood affect those decisions? Like, I don't know much about that from you.

SPEAKER_01 15:12

Dude, I was I again, I was uh, I was a kid that, you know, to to this day, you know, I look back and I'm and I wish I was was able to, I don't want to say I was, you know, like a a student a kid that couldn't focus on anything, but I really couldn't, dude. Okay, yeah. Um I was very successful in a lot of things I did because I was just a stubborn kid and I and I whatever I did I wouldn't quit on. Um, but it never really allowed me to like dive into like some deeper interests and focus. Everything was about sports and fitness. That was the only time that I could focus, bro. Like if I was on the that's like part of the reason why I was very successful in athletics, because it was the only time my mind I felt like was at peace.

SPEAKER_04 15:56

One thing you enjoyed it, you loved it. And I was locked in.

SPEAKER_01 15:59

Yeah, you know, but like I never developed any type of um you know interest in in any other things, bro. Like, you know, my wife says it all the time, and it was it took a while as I like grown up to like show different interests and hobbies. I didn't care about nothing but sports and fitness. And like, you know, so like why growing up, that's all that's all I had, bro. Yeah, you know, so like when I you know got into the real world, you know, and I graduated college, it was like a slap in the face, dude. It was like all right, and like and I and this was this this is a funny story that you asked. This is because the one thing I wanted to do my whole life was be a sports broadcaster.

SPEAKER_04 16:41

Really?

SPEAKER_01 16:41

I there was just something I wanted to do. Wow, I didn't know that at all. Next next time we we shoot, I gotta bring in. I have a uh uh this old ass, I don't want to call it a binder, but a big plastic file folder. Okay. I used to collect newspaper articles, uh, statistics from everything. And again, once again, the only thing that could get my mind locked in was something sports related. Sports related, yeah. So here I am, thinking I'm gonna be the next fucking Marv Albert or whatever, dude, Chris Berman. And that's all I wanted to do. I went to Iona College for a communication degree. Okay. And the day I graduated, bro, I'm like, dude, what did what did I go to school for? No clue, right?

SPEAKER_00 17:24

It's like a realization. Oh my god. Nothing, bro.

SPEAKER_02 17:26

That's crazy. Nothing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:28

And it was my last semester where I interned at Steiner Sports. Okay. Had nothing to do with my communication degree. It was actually more of a business degree, like a business internship.

SPEAKER_00 17:39

Probably, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 17:40

But I got in, I knew somebody, it dealt with sports. It was like, and here I am. Like, I'm almost graduating, and now I don't even want to be a fucking broadcaster. Wow. And I'm I'm like, what am I doing? Yeah. Right. So I graduated, I own a college, pretty much uh not knowing what I did. And I don't know. I mean, I think you know, I went back and I cut trees down for about five years. Yep. Um I know that. You know, after college. And I was making good money. It was one of my dad's uh friends' companies, and the dude wanted me to um he wanted me to help like take part of the business over. Okay. Um doing more of like spraying and like it's a bus a big business, spraying and herbicide. And he wanted me to get licensed, and what an opportunity, like I always felt that I didn't, I didn't have the opportunity to explore and do really what I wanted to do for myself before I could lock into this business, right? And um, you know, the crazy story, what got me away was I was up in a tree one day, and I don't know, I probably told you the story. This guy wanted weight. I I used to climb. Yeah, yeah. Right. There this guy wanted weight taken off the tree that was above his house.

SPEAKER_00 18:53

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 18:53

And when you tie into something, you have to tie in, when I say tie in, that's your climbing line. Okay. You have to tie into something that is is uh straight.

SPEAKER_04 19:01

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 19:02

If you tie into something that's like like on an angle away from the base of the tree, just the gravity is gonna pull you away from the tree. Oh, interesting. Yeah, so when I went to go tie in, I had to tie into the back side of the tree that was facing the woods, right? And I lowered myself down to the other side of the tree that was over his house. And now, in order to stay over there, you have um your uh your carabiner, which is attached with a belt, and the belt was around the branch that I was about to cut to keep me over there. I made the cut. The minute I make the cut, I hear a cracking. So now keep in mind I'm probably like 50 feet up in a tree. I got my belt around this branch over here, and I look up, and the back side of the tree is falling into the woods, and that was the side that I was tied into.

SPEAKER_04 19:51

Wow.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

I I immediately my reaction was to throw the belt off. I throw the belt off, that back side of the tree falls into the woods, and I'm there just with my belt and my spikes about 50 feet in the air.

SPEAKER_04 20:05

Holy cow.

SPEAKER_01 20:06

With no rope to lower myself, um, I had to shimmy down the tree.

SPEAKER_04 20:10

Holy cow.

SPEAKER_01 20:11

I uh excuse my language, almost shit my pants.

SPEAKER_04 20:13

I would I'm thinking about it right now.

SPEAKER_01 20:15

And then I and I came down out of the tree and I said to myself, yeah, I gotta college the great, I gotta figure out what I want to do. Yeah. Right? That's a big moment, really. So that was that that was that was the moment that got me out of the tree work, and then start saying, Yo, dude, you gotta kind of figure out what the hell you want to do.

SPEAKER_04 20:31

So then this is when you went back.

SPEAKER_01 20:33

So then I went back to school at Manhattanville. Okay. Uh well, I went to Enterprise, I worked for Enterprise for a while, um, renting cars, running a branch in White Plains, dead end, dead end thing, business. Taught me a little bit, right? But then I was like, yo, dude, like what is it, bro? I gotta, I gotta figure this out. And my mom's a phys ed teacher. Okay. And I knew I always loved, you know, that element, and that was it. A couple of my buddies were in the field as well. Um, I went back to school from Manhattanville, got into the teaching aspect, knew I loved sports, wanted to coach. Um, and then, you know, it was like, uh, well, how can I, you know, make more money on the side? And that's where the training business was. That's where training started. Okay. You know, and that's how I got down.

SPEAKER_04 21:14

Before you went to trans, before transforming all that happened, did you just start doing stuff on the side training-wise? Like I don't even know where you started training and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

So my first client was one of my I used to work in a district 75 school. My first teaching job was with like the school psychologist there. And I used to, you know, I at that time it was just a passion. I loved working out. I put together some sick workouts. I really didn't know too much. I just thought I was a great person to work out with, right? Yeah, yeah, I would imagine it's fun. Yeah. So I I I started training one of the school psychologists. Um, you know, in the building, we used to go after school to like the local like Pelum Bay Park, and I used to train her on the field. Okay, yeah. And then I got my first client was uh, I don't even know where he came from. It was uh my brother. Boy Danny Vitagliano, if you're listening, bro. Love you, dude. Super proud of you, kid. Um, but he was my first client that I trained at a New York sports club. Oh, get out of here. Okay. Okay. And then, you know, that was it. I kept building. I did um, where did I go? I did some Bronxville Fitness. Okay. And then that's where I met, you know, Brian Harrington. And we started um, you know, Transform Fitness. Okay. And, you know.

SPEAKER_04 22:25

And then that's where it all goes. That's where me and Ant mets. Yeah. Wow. I didn't so I didn't even realize that, to be honest. Even like with going back to school. I know you went back to school to get the teaching and all that for Physette.

SPEAKER_02 22:35

Yep.

SPEAKER_04 22:35

But that's pretty crazy, you know, doing the tree cutting. I always remember you talking about the story a little bit, but now we're actually talking about it a little more deeper. Like, it's pretty wild, you know, kind of shifted you pretty hard. But Mr. Sports Broadcaster, bro, I feel like you know what's funny? I think sometimes when I think I when I listen to Boomer, uh not Boomer, Garton, card.

SPEAKER_01 22:54

I'm like, I can't do this. He's got almost like that same mind. Like, dude, like as I think about it now. What discouraged me is there's no money in the business, and you gotta, you know, you gotta know obviously you gotta know people everywhere. Of course, to get into these places build, right? Yeah, it's a lot of people. I hear these guys, dude. Like I know for a fact I would kill it.

SPEAKER_04 23:13

Yeah, you know. All right, Dan, listen, I'm talking to the producer. Dan, you're gonna set up a nice uh studio for this guy. We're gonna start a new show for him, all right? Del Vecchio Sportscasting, all right? But anyway, you know, again, going back to a lot of this stuff, I I we really want to dive into some things. So I know we talked about there were some times in your life, we obviously talked about the timeline, but where was that point where you were really feeling some struggles or some hard times for yourself? Was it before kids, after kids? What where when was that?

SPEAKER_01 23:42

You know, I I I I think, you know, just to kind of segue back to like being young, I was always all over the place and never really um fully present. And I think that was something that stayed with me a long time. Where like even though I just told you I figured out that I wanted to be a teacher, it was always some like a piece of me that was never fully like what's the word that I'm looking for, confident in my choice. Okay. It was always uh a second guessing of things. Like I I knew I enjoyed it, um but you know, I would always second guess things. And I was in a road at that, and it was you know, probably not too long after I had graduated and I started teaching, where like you know, I just I started feeling pressure being a young adult, bro. Like I started later um than a lot of people, right? And I was putting, you know, we go back to that pressure piece from a young age with my dad. Yeah, right. I there was always pressure, like you could always do more, like, dude, you're a teacher making this amount of money. And um, you know, that comparison piece got me. And then, you know, there was there was things that were, you know, going on, you know, pre before I got married with my uh with Scarlett. Um and it was just pulling me in a lot of different directions. And a guy, you know, that a lot of people don't know. If you look at me from the outside, you would think uh uh my whole life I was this super uh confident, um, you know, alpha male, but there was a part of me on the inside, you know, that was hurting for a long time. And you know, that started to rear its head um when I started to get pulled in all these different directions.

SPEAKER_04 25:25

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 25:25

Um, you know, and uh and you know, I at some point, you know, it it it got me to to hit rock bottom. Okay. Right. I don't, you know, I never drank, I wasn't a drinker, I never got uh into the drugs, I never knew that. No, but I but I uh you know I was a I was a thinker, and my own mind was fucking me. Yeah right, right. So like again, we have all these addictions and these poor habits. Mine was not being able to get a grip on my ruminating mind.

SPEAKER_04 25:57

Got it.

SPEAKER_01 25:57

Right? And that again, that that like it makes sense as I'm looking at it now, going through it, and to understand why, right? So uh, you know, whereas like you hear about these people having traumatic experiences in their life that break them down. I never really had a huge traumatic experience to get me to to hit that rock bottom.

SPEAKER_04 26:19

Yeah, but um but you wore yourself down mentally, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:23

Yeah, bro. And um, you know, uh it's just my the hardest part of my life was probably you know, right as I was going into that business of opening up a business of transform fitness, right? Um, getting in into to you. And for a lot of people that don't know the the story you know behind the gym, I didn't want to I didn't want to sell my shares out of there. Um I didn't wanna, you know, I worked real hard with Brian to create this facility. Um, you know, and you know, I look at it and I say things happen for reasons, and I'm very grateful for those things, but I I ended up losing a a a fitness facility that I spent uh six, seven years in. And then for those that know me and know John, I sold my shares to then have to make a decision where I have all of these clientele. Do I go train somewhere else? How do you go from your business to owning the business to making money on everything that goes on in there to selling your shares, and now I have to pay rent to the fuck to the gym that I started, right?

SPEAKER_04 27:29

Dude, that would eat me a lot. That I that's hard a decision.

SPEAKER_01 27:32

You know, I had all of that. I had stuff going on in my relationship.

SPEAKER_04 27:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:36

I had the the the social pressures of of being a uh newlywed, growing into, you know, um, you know, the timing of having a child, having my own business that I was so passionate about, crumble, and now here I am, um, where things are still okay.

SPEAKER_04 27:55

Things are still fine, right? You still have your business, your clients, right?

SPEAKER_01 27:58

That that mind and the consistent run of the mill, like of the world we live in, we gotta keep going, going, going.

SPEAKER_04 28:06

Never stop.

SPEAKER_01 28:07

The burnout, you know, it just it all came, you know, all at once.

SPEAKER_04 28:11

Well, it's for me, seeing that from the outside, I I felt that from you at points during Transform. And now I was young at that time, like I probably didn't look at it as I am now or how we're talking about it, but there were points like, damn, like, Ant looks like shot today, you know, or you were working early, you'd go do your your job, your data job, and then come back. Yeah, and like you were on a grind, and that burnout, we've all been every trainer goes through it. Anyone who's really pushing themselves to another level, you're working a couple things on the side, you burn out. But I saw that from you.

SPEAKER_01 28:42

Yeah, the physical burnout is one, but the mental, yeah. Mental, you know, dude. There were days uh that like I I had to sit in the car knowing that I had had gone all day teaching, did sessions before school, and then I gotta go in and do from three o'clock to eight o'clock at night. I had to sit in a car to just gather myself because I couldn't get out of the car.

SPEAKER_02 29:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:03

Right? Not and and then having to put a show on for all my clients and all you guys, right? You know, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 29:10

Um because now you gotta drop your stuff at the door. You're walking into a place that you used to be a major part of an owner of it, and now you're like, I'm renting space, you see things thriving there, right? Things were moving well there. Not to push that on you, but like the gym was doing well. Like, that's I can't even imagine that. Check out part two of episode 16, coming soon. Only right here at the Prime Parent Podcast. The Prime Parent Podcast mission is for parents who refuse to just survive parenthood. They're here to lead it. We deliver the tools, systems, and strategies to help you stay ready, stay strong, and stay locked in for what matters most.