Love & Life, Sorted
A Cambridge PhD sociologist's intimate, no-BS talk about love, family and everything in between.
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Love & Life, Sorted
How to Manifest Your Soulmate like Dua Lipa: “Training Season” Manifestation Secrets
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What if the love of your life was just one clear intention away?
In this heartfelt episode of Love & Life Sorted, Dr. Sandy To explores the powerful art of manifesting your soulmate — inspired by Dua Lipa’s beautiful real-life love story. After a string of disappointing dates, Dua channeled her frustrations into the hit song “Training Season,” clearly defining exactly what she wanted (and didn’t want) in a partner. Just one year later, she met Callum Turner in the most serendipitous way, and they’re now married.
Dr. To breaks down how writing down your desires, turning them into a personal mantra, and learning from past relationships can shift your romantic destiny. She shares inspiring real-life stories — including her own — of people meeting their perfect partners right after completing major life milestones, proving that the universe often delivers when we’re truly ready.
Whether you believe in soulmates, fate, or the power of radical optimism, this episode will leave you feeling hopeful, empowered, and motivated to call in the deep, soul-level love you deserve. Stop settling for “boys who need training” and start attracting a mature, supportive partner who truly sees your soul.
If you’re tired of bad dates and ready for meaningful love, this is the episode you don’t want to miss.
Tune in, reflect, write your own “Training Season” list, and start manifesting.
#ManifestYourSoulmate #DuaLipa #DuaLipaWedding @DuaLipaMarriage #TrainingSeason #ManifestLove #LawOfAttraction #SoulmateManifestation #FindYourPerson #ManifestationTips #RelationshipAdvice #RadicalOptimism #CallInLove #RelationshipExpertInsights #SingleWomenDatingTips #SociologyOfLove
🔑 Key Topics
- Dua Lipa’s “Training Season” manifestation story and real-life marriage to Callum Turner
- How to get crystal clear on what you want (and don’t want) in a partner
- Learning from past dating failures through honest self-reflection
- The power of writing down desires and using mantras or songs to manifest
- Soulmates, fate, timing, and “Sliding Doors” moments
- Meeting your person after completing big life goals or milestones
- Radical optimism and constructive manifestation techniques
- Why there can be more than one soulmate and how the universe gives second chances
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Hi everyone, welcome back to Love and Life Sorted. I'm Dr. Sandy Toe, and today we're gonna be talking about manifesting your partner. Yes, uh, before I had an episode that talked about manifesting your deepest desires in the year of the horse, right? And uh thank you for tuning in. Um, but today we're gonna be more specific in our topic. It's like manifesting your partner, your soulmate. Yeah, so this episode was deeply inspired by Dua Lipa and her new marriage to Callum Turner. Yeah, so congratulations to them. This is like a huge, huge big deal. Like, such positive news. I'm sure everyone is just so over the moon that Dua and Taylor, like, they both found the love of their lives and uh are getting married, and Dua just got married. Dua manifested her husband with her song Training Season. It's interesting that a year before there were or already like talks of what the song was about when she went on interviews uh on various shows. But uh I think it was after she got married, like after it really did come true, culminated in this happy ending for real, that people started talking about it again, like how she manifested her husband through the song. Yeah, so it's a song that she co-wrote the lyrics with uh other songwriters, and um the story was that she went on a string of bad dates, and then you know, she's like, I've had it. And the next day she went to the studio and uh did a debriefing with her uh songwriters and came up with this song, and you know, in her mind that she she was like really clear suddenly of what she wanted in a partner and what she did not want in a partner, and she wrote it all in that song. So if you listen carefully, like a lot of people know this song, and it's a huge, huge hit, right? Um, if you listen more carefully to the lyrics, like you would see like she's really exact. Exact without being too specific. Like she doesn't really specify exactly like what color the hair or height or what does the guy need to look like, you know, does he have to be English or something? Uh she doesn't really specify that, you know, but it's it's more like character uh things, like whether or not he gets her and understands her. Uh it's like um yeah, she wants to find a man who can take the lead. Yes, whom she could like uh lean on in times of vulnerability. And uh she doesn't need to tell him what to do, doesn't need to train him to know what to do. It's someone like that can look into her soul and uh is her soulmate. Yeah. And so a year after she wrote the song, she met her husband, Callum Turner. He was such a heartthrob in Fantastic Beasts as Eddie Redmain's brother. And yeah, he's like the next Colin Firth, like a real like preppy, hot English gentleman type. And even the way that they met was super serendifitous. So uh I don't know if you have read about it, but I was like, wow, okay, so uh news just surfaced uh on the details about how they met. And uh well, okay, the very first time they had already met somewhere in London when Dua was having dinner with her uh father, and then uh she bumped into Callum, but I don't I don't know if they actually knew each other then, but uh or were they had they collaborated before, maybe not, like she's a singer, he's an actor. Although she does uh have some uh some some roles in in some movies, but I don't think they knew each other like really well, or maybe they were just like maybe two famous people like bumped into each other and said hi. Like it was just very you know fleeting. But then afterwards in LA they went to a mutual friend's birthday and they each had a book in their hands. Uh although they didn't they they didn't explain why. I mean, like um going to a friend's birthday was so boring that you had to go off and read a book, right? So that that was that was just uh that was like the the details were sketchy on that, but that doesn't matter, that's not the gist of it. But the most important thing was like they were seated next to each other. I don't know if it was a setup or on purpose or not, but they each had the same book in their hands. It was a novel called Trust, and uh one of them uh you know struck up a conversation and said, uh, I just finished reading the first chapter. And the other one said, Uh, oh me too, I just finished the the first chapter. And then Callum said, Uh, well then we're on the same page. Very witty. A really great pickup line. But it has to be that that person really did read the same page as you, right? So it's not a pickup line that can be used arbitrarily. So I think from that point on, the stars were aligned. Like, you know, the the way that you met this person, wow, what was just so fateful, wasn't it? Like, it just so happened that they were reading the same book. Like the same book in the universe. Like, what are the chances of that, right? I think there are like what, like a thousand million books in the world, right? So it just so happened that they were were they were carrying it to that to that uh occasion as well. Like that was also miraculous, wasn't it? It's it's not that they bumped into each other on the beach and they were reading that like on the sand or something, but they were at like this someone's party and they were holding the same book. So that I think was really quite uh miraculous, and it was really meant to be. Yeah, and shortly, uh within a year, they got engaged and got married. So and I believe that Dua uh is a believer of manifestation. It wasn't at random that she wrote this song, because when she was writing it, she had already realized the power of words about writing words onto paper, and you know, writing it down is actually uh willing it into existence. And she said she had to be careful about the lyrics because she'll be singing this through and through. It's like a chanting a mantra. So if it really is what she wants, then that's great. But she better be careful of what you wish for. Yeah, so there's a saying, um, you have to be careful what you wish for. Yeah. So yeah, it uh she had to make sure that uh all of them fell into place, like what she wants and doesn't want, like she it describes it uh really accurately, so she doesn't wish for the wrong thing, right? Wish for the wrong guy. Yeah, so that was how like training season uh this song had transpired and successfully manifested her husband. So what we can all learn from this is that first of all, you need to be confident and find out what you want. Like be very sure and not wishy-washy. And I I think it pays to really look in look inside and do a lot of self-reflection, maybe after a string of failed relationships or bad dates that went wrong. I I think it pays to actually go back and uh revisit them, even though it's painful. Like to revisit, like, was it you that went wrong or the other person, or was it just not a good match because uh of you know individual differences and what you could do better with the next person? Uh is it that the next person needs to fulfill your certain criteria and has to be a good fit with your personality? Yeah, so in Doa's case, like I uh she was like quite specific in that the string of like boys, quote unquote, that she dated uh when she was single, like dated casually, they didn't work, like not one of them worked, and they were all terrible, as she said, uh, was because they were boys, not men, and they they were like not mature and just not treating her like she wanted, and uh and yeah, she's she's done with dealing with these boys that need to be trained to be men, right? So she yeah, so so she had encountered like the same uh flaw as these people. So yeah, it pays to really like look inside and reflect uh what what went wrong in your previous relationships. Was uh it like a particular reason, a particular flaw that kept recurring? So yeah, this is a this is like a big sign that you really should get past this flaw. And yeah, like like do uh, like if you want to manifest someone who's different, who's not like these losers and wankers, then you need to really like write down that you want a mature, stable, responsible guy who can take the lead. Yeah, so that's exactly what she wrote. Yeah, someone you can depend on and uh look into your soul. Yeah, so it's clearly that she wants to find her soulmate. So you can do the same as well. Like uh look toward this as a very positive example that worked. Yeah, so look into the the failed relationship attempts, the failed dates, and then see if there's an ongoing recurring pattern, and then try to rectify the pattern by saying that that is not what you want. Like, write it down, yeah. Not saying, uh, yeah, well, you you can you can totally uh uh discuss with your friends, and that was what Dua did with the songwriters, which were her friends. Like she did a debriefing about her her last date with them and how terrible it was, and then she said, Okay, guys, training season's over. And then that was what uh that was what led to this song, right? So uh for everyone else, like I think we can totally do the same, you know, write down uh what you don't want for sure, and uh be very constructive about it, because like she was not like all whiny and negative about it, but but she was like very specific and very constructive. Uh she she said what she didn't want and what she wanted, on the other hand. I don't know if you uh realize this, but many a times we realize what we want from exactly from what we don't want. Yeah, yeah, sometimes like we we don't we're not really clear about what we want. Uh I think uh a lot of us are, because if you haven't experienced something bad, like something that you definitely don't want, uh like not going back for more of that, then you know that okay, so I don't want A, uh then that means I want B, right? Yeah, so I think it's like a really good inspiration, you know, see it that way. Because uh some of the some of us, if we don't have a lot of um experience of relationships or like dates or or or something like that, uh if you ask us what we want, uh it's usually very generic. Uh well, you know, want someone who's a good guy, a a great girl, uh, or um a family-oriented person who has good values and is polite and you know treats them well, you know, that's very generic things that we don't know exactly, you know, what actually works out for us, right? So uh I think a good test is that like if you had something um not really positive happen to you, like uh the last relationship or the last date, maybe it was just like one date with this very immature person. Uh yeah, you don't even have to go that very deep with this person, but maybe uh there's some character flaws that you find that you absolutely can't tolerate, then that's like the opposite should be what you go for, right? So maybe a very immature like guy, and then you so you so you would know that what works for you is someone who is very dependable, very mature, who can uh lead you and you can rely on. Yeah, so first of all, be very clear, uh look into yourself, be very clear about what you want and don't want, and write it down. Yeah, so writing it down puts the wish into motion and concretizes it ten times. Yeah, so it's already set into motion by you're writing it down. It's already existing on paper, isn't it? So you've actually written it into existence. Rather than it, you know, just uh floating somewhere in your mind, you've actually concretized it. Yeah, you've put it onto paper. So as I said, like everything, like all contracts, agreements, they're all on paper for you to sign, right? There's a reason why it's not just recorded or something. But hey, but no, actually recording something like what I'm doing, it'll be like uh online forever, right? So it has like an online footprint already. Yeah, so I'm out also putting it into existence, like putting my words uh into reality. Right, so you can do the same by um either recording it and listening to it, like dua, like um besides writing down the lyrics, she also sang it, you know, uh many, many times and recorded it and put it out into the world so you can listen to it, and you can benefit from it too. You can use it as your mantra too. Yeah, so this is a really great uh exercise and manifestation. Yeah, recording something, uh reciting it, singing it, uh, you know, it it's uh you know, recording, writing, these are all ways of putting your wish into the world. Yeah, so the next thing is uh that you can learn is like dua, be constructive about it. Yeah, because uh you can see that, like, yeah, she she is really a fan of radical optimism, right? Like you can you can see by her uh her albums and her songs, like they are all uh quite uplifting, right? Aren't they? Like the song for Barbie, yeah, love that song. I thought I thought like that song was the best part of the Barbie movie, in my opinion, yeah. Uh so they're all like so so upbeat and so uplifting and so positive, aren't they? So that really contributes to her success. So yeah, be optimistic and be positive uh and constructive, even though you're saying what you don't want, but it is actually leading to what you do want, right? So the whole purpose of that is not to diss the people, but it's more like trying to find out the opposite of that, like what you actually do want. You're using that as a launch pad to find out what you do want. And yeah, those uh people they they don't need to take it that personal because uh well, what doesn't work for you may work for someone else, right? So uh it's it's it's a matter of matching, really. Yeah, so uh remember to treat things constructively, not whining and moaning and groaning about what didn't work out, but use that as a launch pad to figure out what will work out for you. And speaking of soulmates, uh whether or not you're a believer of soulmates, um there could be more than one. You know, there's a saying that there's not just one soulmate of a person, and soulmate doesn't necessarily have to be romantic either. You know, all the people that are in your life uh for good, uh for long term, like your own parents, like your own siblings, your own uh friends for life, uh your family members, you you know, like out of a gazillion uh people on the earth in the universe, like why are these people your nearest and dearest? You know, it it must be because uh you're fated to be connected with with each other uh in this life of yours. Yeah, I'm a big believer of that. Your relationship is much, much deeper than you think. Uh yeah, it runs really deep, and you would have had many, many lifetimes coinciding with each other on some level to end up in this lifetime uh being so deeply connected, so permanently connected. Yeah, so it really is like a matter of fate. Um yeah, soulmates, when we say soulmates, it's not just romantic connections, right? Um, but okay, if we're saying uh in this case, uh trying to find your soulmate, your partner, I do believe that uh you can find your soulmate, and there is this person that is deeply connected with you, who understands you, and who can look into your soul and uh you into theirs, and you would just know it's right. You would just click. And uh but the thing is I also believe that there may not be just one. Yeah, so you don't need to be very discouraged if you haven't found them yet. Uh well, chances are if you do manifestation, uh, you would probably expedite the process. Like, say, uh, we don't know if if Dua didn't write training season, uh, will she have had met Callum in this lifetime or so soon, you know, within the year, would she have actually run into him? Like this guy who's holding the same book as her, being so serendipitous and counter, right? Uh, we don't know. We we can never know. Right? Mm you know, the the secrets of the universe. But the thing we also don't know is if she hadn't written Training Season, if she'd written another song, uh based on another set of uh criteria, would she have actually manifested someone else other than Callum? Yeah, we also don't know. And for ourselves as well, you know, uh have you ever thought about uh besides your current partner, were there other people who have passed you by in this lifetime? So I I can tell you, like, it is like very much a sliding doors type of rationale. Like it's it's a a concept. So if you have watched uh the famous movie uh sliding doors, uh it is about what happens in your life is actually a matter of the right time, right place, uh, in order for an occurrence to occur, right? So if if you had missed the train uh you know by a second and you have gone on the next train, maybe you like your whole uh life trajectory could have changed. The person that you were meant to meet, you probably would have missed. Or you have gone on to meet someone else that you were also meant to uh meet. Yeah, so uh instead of soulmate number one, maybe you would have met soulmate number two and would have ended up just as well.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_00So yeah, I I really d am a deep believer in uh the right place, right time, you know, for something to occur, which is called fate. So it is exactly like, you know, sometimes when we look back in our youth, uh there are some things that we we could have missed out because we were like not in the right mindset. Maybe we were like not mature enough, uh, we were not ready for it. And so uh maybe our like uh one relationship that was meant for us would have passed us by. Maybe soulmate number one that we were meant to meet at this age uh had passed us by. Uh but uh I guess never fear because there's not only one. Uh the universe will not only be so stingy and and give you one, and that if you were not ready for it, uh you would have just lost your chance forever. Uh they would give you another chance for sure. So don't worry about it. So if it was just not the right time for you, maybe on another occasion after several years, uh, when you are ready, you might meet this person again, or you might meet your other soulmate, which was meant for you. And you know, vice versa, it would have been actually have to be like a combination of readiness for both parties. So even if you were ready at this particular age, maybe your person wasn't for some reason. And they would have to pass you by, and then they would have to wait a number of years to meet someone else, while you uh would be would be meeting your person number two. Yeah, and they would have the same outcome, which is bliss, right? So the outcome could be the same, but the person could be a different one. Yeah, so I I I would, you know, looking back, uh that that is what uh I think. Yeah, the the experience that I've had is there could be have been a number of people which I could end up with, but maybe it was not my time at that time because. I was emotionally not ready. And so I had forgone the opportunity without my knowing back then, obviously. And then looking back, those people have actually found their um perfect partners too at this time. And you know, uh it's it's not really a matter to be um disappointed over. It's just life. It's just fate. And the outcome is the same. That uh it is like a good outcome and everyone's happy and you know we're we're ha leading bl blissful lives um individually. So another pattern that I noticed was that you people usually meet their other half, their partners, when they've completed something big in their life. Yeah, so for for myself, um it was after I had published my book. Uh the next month that I did was when I met my husband. Yeah, I I'm not exactly sure. Uh was it the it was the exact same month that I'd published it, uh in May 2015, was when my friends were celebrating with me, and then uh w that was when one of them had suggested that really off-handedly, suddenly, that oh my brother knows someone who says he knows you. So uh over this 20 years that I've known her, she hadn't mentioned this before, and it was before because her brother hadn't mentioned this before until now, until that time, right? The exact time. And so uh I think the the other month was the month that we really got together as a group and we met up. So, yeah, so um after one thing, after one uh big goal was completed, uh, and I have suddenly uh opened up my schedule and have a lot of free time because before I was just like really obsessed about finishing the book because I had a deadline, right? And and so after that was done, uh it was like uh I I was like more free suddenly, and then there was like room in my life to do something else. Yeah, and I think the universe can sense it. And uh, you know, it it sensed that I was ready to move on to a different stage in life, and so it gave me my soulmate. Yeah, it made it led me to meet my soulmate. Right, uh, and so uh this is there there is a very distinctive pattern here uh that this would happen to a lot of people. I did some research, you know, uh, on my c closest friends. Uh, and I'm gonna do more, yeah, more research on more uh people. But uh my the friend that I had just interviewed, Denise, yeah, Denise, who's a partner in a law firm. Uh sh uh I was asking her, uh uh interviewing her about like how she met her husband because she was so busy, like she works until like uh all through the night and rarely has time to come out, and she says she still tries to squeeze out time to come out amidst her busy schedule. You know, it's really tough to meet uh someone um when you're so busy with your job, right? Uh so she still managed to meet her husband when she moved back to Hong Kong. Like basically she was working in New York uh after she had completed the bar over there, after she graduated from Georgetown. She went to work in a law firm in New York for a number of years. And then like one day she just decided that she wanted to move back to Hong Kong to see Asia. And like very shortly after that, like after making this momentous decision, after moving back here, she met her husband, like really, really soon. Yeah, so that's that is one um example of someone, you know, moving to a different stage in life and meeting their soulmate. Yeah, and my other friends, uh, she also met her husband uh right when she decided to take up a job offer in the UK. So she was someone from uh working in Hong Kong, and then she thought she decided to move back to London to take up a job offer, right? And uh she had packed up all her things and already uh uh found somewhere to stay, and uh she was already there. She basically she had she she was physically already there. We said our goodbyes and everything, and she was there. And then that was when she met her husband. Yeah, she suddenly met this guy who she had uh ties with back then um through work. Like she was working in this person's office, like this was like uh one of her clients, and uh they had known each other, but they they weren't like uh they didn't know each other very well, but there was a good impression back then. But they were probably both in separate relationships. Yeah, like she was definitely in a relationship when she met this guy through work, and never had sh will had she thought that she would see see him again. So so right when she moved to London, she she uh ran into this guy, and he immediately, like knowing that she was single, like he immediately uh chased after her. And uh and that led to her moving back to Hong Kong. So even if all her things were all uh in the in London, like she moved back to Hong Kong to be with uh this person who would become her husband within the year. So that led to her quitting the job. Well, because obviously um you you can't tell your your boss that, well, uh I'm moving back to Hong Kong. And yeah, it's like sorry, I took the offer, but I'm leaving, right? So so she she basically like she she didn't ask to be transferred or anything, she just quit. Uh and then uh she started her own business after she got married. So yeah, that was great. Yeah, um, a great new step for her. And uh, you know, all of this was uh kick-started because she had decided to move to London, like this huge momentous decision, uh a huge step in her life, like moving forward, right? So yeah, the universe decided to throw in a curveball and have her meet her husband there and move back here immediately. So that was wonderful. It worked out great. Yeah, uh so another example. Uh I have like so many examples of people meeting their other half, you know, finding their partner immediately after they completed something big in life. So uh look at this this is uh like a a bit of entertainment news. Uh these days in Hong Kong, there's like uh some big news about a man who's 70 in his 70s, um, marrying a girl who is 40 years her junior. Okay, so before you uh gop and open your mouth, uh please close it. Because uh, well, if you hear about this uh fateful encounter, you would not be so in shock. Right, um, so uh at the outset, we're all like deeply in shock over this age gap marriage. Uh but uh if you hear how they met, you would see how fateful it was and how they were meant to be soulmates in this lifetime. So this man, uh his wife uh died five years ago, and this man is a politician and he is a uh Chinese opera uh enthusiast. Yeah, and so uh he and his wife, they they both loved to go to the to those uh Chinese opera shows. And um w one one time uh they went to see a competition, and the winner of this uh uh Cantonese drama competition was Yamina, like was the girl that he is destined to marry now. And she was six years old when she won a primary school competition. Yeah, and uh rumor has it that uh she was even introduced to him by his late wife back then. Uh because maybe like she really adored this girl who like was so talented when she was so young. Um and so uh their first encounter when was when she was six years old, uh, and he was with his wife, yeah, in his mid uh middle age. Right, and so after his wife uh died, um uh well be even before uh they were family friends. Like he and this girl, they met through work and they were you know they were maintaining a very cordial uh relationship, uh just like uh a mentor and a mentee sort of relationship. But it was after the girl, so so yeah, Yamina is uh besides being like a canto uh a Cantonese opera singer, uh she's also uh veterinarian. Yeah, so she had just passed her veterinarian exam, and she's like like she can be a qualified vet. And uh the minute that she passed, like she she had called up her mentor, and they were, you know, uh really enthusiastic, like they were uh rejoicing and celebrating, and that was when uh they realized that there was a s romantic spark, and that was when um through the celebration they decided to be together as a couple. Yeah, so um another yet another case of when something momentous happens, like a big momentous change uh occurs in someone's life. Um when uh you've completed a stage and you're ready to move on, uh that was when uh she met uh well that was when she decided that she wanted to be with this guy. Yeah, so uh need we any more examples of this? Uh the universe knows uh when you're ready to move on to a different stage in life. So uh if you are actually like uh fretting over whether you uh are gonna meet your partner or like worrying that uh why you haven't met them yet, uh maybe if you're going through something, uh maybe you're about to pass an exam or you're about to make a huge life-changing job decision, uh, or uh in face of a big promotion or something. Maybe the minute that you do complete this stage in your life and you're ready to move on, that is when the universe will lead you to find your partner. And that is when your soulmate will appear. I hope that was uplifting for you. And uh yeah, just never fear because the universe has a time and place for everything. And uh, if you're like Dua, uh you wanna speed up things, you wanna expedite things, uh, and me as well. Like I also wrote down as my top number one desire was that uh like the the partner I wanted to find. I I also had criteria criteria. I wanted to find someone like uh kind, caring, considerate, uh compatible. Yeah, I yeah, I I I believe those were the qualities that I specified. And uh and and I got it. Yeah, right after I completed something momentous in my life, uh, was ready to move on to a next stage, that's when my husband appeared. So I hope you're all deeply inspired and encouraged by this. And you're ready to uh so when you're ready to move on to a next stage in life, uh the universe will heed your wishes and they uh it will fulfill them. So, but you, if you want to expedite the process, if you want to like give it a a little nudge, you have to do something too. Um so I would start by writing it down like dua, and maybe even singing it. If you're like a really gifted lyricist and uh songwriter, uh you know how to compose your own songs, write it down like her, and you know, uh either show it off to the world, because you know what? The more people sing it, the more power it will have uh in this world, right? Like, imagine like so many people chanting the same thing for you, or even you know, for themselves as well. Uh, even if you're singing do a song, if you find that what she believes in, like what she wants, is what you want, maybe you can sing sing it as well. And it might work for you. Like the same type of person might appear in your life too. So let's give it a go at manifesting. You won't be disappointed. Thank you so much for being here. And remember to subscribe to Love and Life Sorta so you don't miss an episode. If you want to see more fun stuff, remember to follow us on IG. And if you haven't subscribed to my newsletter, please do so so we can continue our chat outside of this podcast. Right, okay, see you again next week, and happy manifesting! Bye.