Aussie Dynamic Duo -life, love & sport.

On this episode former Olympian Simon Thompson and his wife Nikki Thompson share life hack of fitness and family and how to keep life in perspective. The Thompsons are an incredible couple from Queensland Australia who manage to live a busy life as working professionals, parents to an 11year old and  on top of this compete world wide together as a couple in functional exercise adventure racing called Hyrocks. From work to the weekend this couple manages to combine sport in literally every aspect of their life. We find out how they do this, why it is so important in relationships to have exercise as an outlet and how cleaning your house can actually give you a six pack if you follow Nikki's recommendations. Tune in and hear how sport does not have to end even if your professional or college career does. Life is sport according to the Thompsons, sit back and enjoy as their share their journey so far.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:15

Hey, welcome to the Plan B podcast. Today's guests are two very special people. I have Simon and Nikki Thompson all the way from Down Under, and they currently live in Maroochydore, which is on the Sunshine Coast in Australia. And they are my guests today, and they're going to share how sport is not only a big part of their life today as a family and in their relationship, but really, we're going to kick it off a little bit by telling you about Simon, one of the halves of this incredible couple. Even though you wouldn't know it, he would never mention it. He's very much under the radar guy. But Simon Thompson is an Olympian in triathlon and he represented Australia at the 2004 Olympics. Now, Tomo, that's like 21 years ago. How does that make you feel?

SPEAKER_02 1:12

Yeah, it feels great. Thanks, Belinda. I mean, it's It's already a blast in the past. It is so good to be here joining you today. I mean, speaking about a triathlon career, like when I was getting started as a kid, you know, you were a number of steps ahead of me and on the journey. And so I was always looking up to you as a young triathlete and trying to follow your pathway as well. So it's quite surreal to be here chatting to you today and really thrilled that you've got us on. I'm really, really grateful to be here.

SPEAKER_00 1:42

Yeah. And guys, I can tell you, I've known Simon since we were teenagers, he looks exactly the same. He looks literally exactly the same. Amazing, amazing bloke and an incredible athlete. So what you've achieved, Simon, in your triathlon career has been so impressive, but that's not actually why I wanted you guys to come on. Because what's been actually more impressive to me is about how you have continued sport post your professional career. And you haven't just put sport just as recreational you've launched into sport in a huge part in your business and now you and Nikki actually compete together looks like a pretty high level sport but before we get to that how did you guys meet and was it through a love of sport or fitness?

SPEAKER_02 2:33

Yeah, I'll kick us off. I mean, I think to your point, Belinda, I think sport's always been such a massive passion in my whole life. You know, I never set out to become an Olympian. That was never a goal that I thought was ever attainable. I loved team sports as a kid. That was what I loved to play. Australian football, basketball, volleyball. They were my passions at school. And I got into triathlon because I was somewhat good at swimming, cycling and running. And it was something that was not a... a sport that was mainstream back then. It was something we did on the side. And I think it was just that passion for sport that has never really left me. It's been something which has always driven me. And so, yeah, even beyond my career, I was always going to be involved in active, have an active lifestyle. And, yeah, I think part of that is what brought me to the Sunshine Coast in the first place. Mum and dad did retire up here, so there was a good excuse to move here but it's a real triathlon community here in Noosa there's a really famous triathlon that's here every year and it's one of the biggest participation triathlon events in the world and so there's a lot of triathletes that have kind of come here to train and race and then ended up retiring here as well so there's a real community that's here and so that's kind of how we ended up together it was you know through mutual friends that knew us and thought when timing was right that we needed Thank you.

SPEAKER_01 4:16

you're single. And I was like, yeah. And they're like, you need to meet Tomo. And I was like, who is this Tomo? And they're like, you met him at Jamie and Pete's Christmas party three months ago. And I was like, I didn't meet him. They're like, he was there. It doesn't mean I met him. And it took us about a year to meet, but they spent a whole year trying to make this kind of gathering happen. And it happened at Pete and Jamie's second Christmas party. I remember you walked into the room and it was like text messages going around between all the girls saying he's walked into the living room. He's going through the kitchen He's making his way around and it took you about an hour to come around. It

SPEAKER_03 4:49

didn't take

SPEAKER_00 4:50

that long. Even in this like small community, you didn't know of Simon Thompson, the former, you know, Olympian, amazing, incredible triathlete. You didn't know of him as that?

SPEAKER_01 5:02

Well, I had heard the girls talk about him before, but no, I didn't know of him because coming from Ireland, triathlon wasn't huge when I was growing up. Even Olympians weren't a thing for me, like it was never a goal for me to ever go to the Olympics we knew of running Olympians and my grandfather was a very accomplished middle distance runner but when I came to Australia I was just doing ultra marathons and trail running was my thing and adventure racing was my thing and then I got into triathlon but I was only more concerned about the existing triathletes rather than previous triathletes and I obviously I knew about Emma Snosal her name was on a plaque down in Manly in Sydney and then I had my best friend was Jamie Jacobs and she'd moved up to Noosa with Pete and then I ended up moving up with her after like not long after her and then she introduced me to everyone like Belinda and Beth and Luke and then suddenly I started training with all these people who were elite athletes and I was just a normal age grouper who I can hold my own but it wasn't my desire to ever be the best in sport I just wanted to go out and have fun and meet all these people and just drink coffee and eat almond croissants if we wrote 100k and And wear a lycra all day and live my best life in Noosa. But then to actually think that I could be partnered with somebody who enjoyed sport as much as me was such a bonus. But then to actually learn of what he had accomplished without him telling me anything. He never told me anything. I know. His dad had to tell me. Yeah. Training partners had to message me. And then everyone started telling me all bits and pieces about what he had ever achieved. And I was like, wow. And then, yeah, it was pretty exciting.

SPEAKER_00 6:47

I sometimes wonder if that's an Aussie thing because like I went and looked on Tomo's Instagram and it's got father, dad, I think lover of sports for life or something like that. I mean, seriously, dude, if you're an Olympian and you lived in the States, you would be dropping it every second. You'd

SPEAKER_01 7:06

have

SPEAKER_00 7:06

O-L-Y. Yeah, I would be dropping it too. Like, no, I would be like milking it for as much, but it's typical Tomo style. He's under the radar and he has been like that his whole life, very understated and probably why he's so loved and adored in our sporting community. So you guys met, you shared a passion for sport, but is that throughout, like, is that just part of your daily life? How does it work? How does it go from being a former Olympian to now doing, it looks like adventure racing together as a couple. Would that be right?

SPEAKER_02 7:45

Well, Well, the latest thing we're into at the moment is a bit of a, it's a pretty popular growing sport called high rocks, which is kind of exploding around the world. And it has a potential to even get into the Olympics coming up as well. But it's essentially functional movement, functional training with running. So you run one kilometre, then you do a station, and then you do that eight times. And so, yeah, it's a really great sport. rowing sport it suits triathletes or old ex-triathletes as well because it's a bit like it's the sort of compromise running that you do off the bike so it's been able to run well with having done lunges with a bag or rowing or burpee broad jumps and things like that so it's a fun sport and we just decided it would be a fun thing to do together because you can do it either individually or you can do it pairs or mixed pairs. And we went and competed in... in December in Melbourne and we qualified for the World Championships in our age group. So, yeah, I mean, it was a 40 to 49 age group. It's quite a broad age group and we're sort of on the top end of that. So it's quite a fast age group. But I thought what an opportunity to go and do something, you know, with your wife. So we decided to go and it was in Chicago in June this year. And so, yeah, so it's been great to have that to train together and to actually compete together as well. So that's what we've done. But we do yoga together. We go to the same yoga studio. We love going to the gym. We go running together as well. We have gone for bike rides, not so much anymore. But, yeah, I think we just love the lifestyle. We love being fit and healthy. We love how it makes us feel. And, you know, that's part of why we live here because it's great weather all around, similar to you. It's so much easier. to be active be outdoors um and enjoy you know the best that life's got to offer

SPEAKER_00 9:58

so tomo i guess one of my questions and nikki you can tell the honest answer to this if tomo is struggling with this because i know having been a you know highly competitive athlete i really didn't want to do any once i got to the point where i was no longer winning or no longer bringing in a decent paycheck and and the body was just not being able to keep up you know my I was heading into having four kids and trying to do seven hours of training for Ironman was never going to work. And so I just easily shelved competitive sport because I only ever wanted to compete as a professional. You know, it was I'm competing against the best. I'm making money. So tell me, Simon, how do you manage having that high level of competitiveness of an elite athlete? How do you then just merge into the general population and do competitions with your wife? Yeah. Because I would be going crazy. I would be like, because my urge to be competitive is too high. I

SPEAKER_02 11:01

think there's probably two things. Firstly, as I said earlier, I never planned on becoming an Olympic athlete or becoming a professional athlete. I kind of... I almost fell into it and it was an opportunity that presented itself and I didn't want to say what if and I just thought I've just got to give this an opportunity to see how far I can take it and I ended up being able to get to the Olympics and to the Commonwealth Games and World Championships and that was really brilliant. But I think when I retired, I retired with the knowledge that I had done what I wanted to do out of the sport. I was very clear. I knew that there was a few things I hadn't done. I hadn't won a World Championship individually World Championship. I hadn't won an Olympic gold medal. I hadn't won the Hawaii Ironman. And I kind of said to myself before I retired, if I didn't win those things, I'd be okay with that. Like there's very few people on the planet that have done those things, right? So I had a long list of other things that I'd accomplished and I was really proud of that. So when I retired, I retired knowing that's it. I've got what I wanted out of that and it's time to go on to something else. And it's hard. Like, you know, you've done it as well like it is a big shift and I don't think anyone that's had that made that transition has found it really easy I was probably really fortunate in that I was able to have a relatively quick transition to something else in business that was able to be my focus but training wise it's really difficult because you know you don't you know you can't keep the routine at that same level that it was before and your performance is starts to shift but I was really fortunate that I came I moved back to Canberra where I had grown up where we'd grown up and a mate of mine had a crossfit gym and all my mates were going there so i just was like great i'm going to go and start doing something different and training and and within three months i was like i'm the fittest i've ever been my entire life like i'm way fitter than i was as a triathlete like i'm now i'm strong i'm now i'm agile now i've got power now i feel good i'm not just tired and feeling crap all the time like i was as an endurance athlete so i was fortunate i just had a different perspective really quickly um And for me, you know, I've always found it to be much more intrinsically satisfying when you're improving as opposed to winning necessarily. And sport has always been a vehicle for me to kind of... reach my full potential in different things so i don't it doesn't matter if i'm not the best at it but if i'm progressing i'm really getting uh really a lot of enjoyment i've done a lot of sports like um like paddling sky like surf sports where i'm absolutely useless you know i can barely stay in the thing um but persisting because i'm improving and i'm able to to sort of get to where i can get to it doesn't matter now that it's not necessarily at a world level but for me i'm better than i was before and so That's something which I think has always been natural to me. That's why I love sports and I've always pursued them. It wasn't necessarily because I wanted to be the best in the world, but if I can use it to get better at myself, then it's really enjoyable.

SPEAKER_00 14:09

And is all he's saying true, Nikki, or is he really like a killer once the siren goes off for this?

SPEAKER_01 14:16

It's 100% true. Yeah, it's helped me change my perspective on sport as well where I used to wake up in the morning and i get anxiety if i didn't do a workout and feel like i'm totally on the back foot for the rest of the day but he's allowed me to just appreciate the smaller things in life and know that i can have a rest day and take the dog for a walk and that's as good as it is for me that day um yeah it's being kind to yourself and kind to life and if you've got a kind mind i think you you'll go further in life get a longer sustainable life

SPEAKER_00 14:54

so if you got are like I'm really curious because you know soon as my husband gets home I'm going to be like planting on him that maybe we could do something like this right now yeah and I doubt it's going to work because he's trying to get me into golf but with you guys doing this competitive natured sport together and then your husband and wife and then on top of that you also have an 11 year old so how's it going with this dynamic of doing some pretty intense stuff together Life's pretty intense. Plus life is busy and you're both professional people. How do you create a balance?

SPEAKER_02 15:33

What did you call it? High rocks, mixed pairs, you call it?

SPEAKER_01 15:36

I call it couples cancelling. Any team sport that involves a husband and wife, I see it as couples cancelling because you get to work together under pressure. And if you blow up and you yell at each other, then that's not going to help anything. But if you work together as a team and you work on each other's strengths and weaknesses, and then the end result is always a big hug, big kiss, and a happy face. But yeah, I think with Archer, I think it's a case of monkey see, monkey do. He's definitely... watched us and he is a natural athlete like he's got so much drive and and he loves being active so when he sees us or hears us going out to go out for a run I think over time he's like oh can I give that a go and we'd always think of what's the most scenic place we can bring him for a run and we'll stop every like one kilometer so he can look at it the dolphins out in the bay or little things like you know he just he gets he gets the endorphin kick as well right and He did an incredible

SPEAKER_02 16:43

job. Yeah, I mean, I sometimes wonder, you know, it's very different to my childhood. My parents didn't do that. But, you know, we get up and exercise every morning, you know, and we kind of, part of the family juggle is, you know, what are you doing this morning? What are you going to do? You know, is Archie going to come with you? You know, is he going to go to the studio while you do yoga or go with you to the gym? Or, you know, will I take him out surfing or we do something together? Like that's our morning routine. And so he doesn't know any tips. with us and it's just, you know, we're very fortunate that he really enjoys doing that stuff. He's sort of naturally a sporty kid as well. And so, yeah, so I think it helps that he's getting exposure to this and he sees exercise and sports as a healthy thing and it's, you know, it's good for him, you know, to go to school having done a bit of exercise, been outside as opposed to just woken up, sitting in front of the TV, have some cereal and then trudge off to school.

SPEAKER_00 17:40

Yeah. Right. Yeah. And I think that's one of the things which I'm hoping in this podcast is to when our guests come on, it's not just sport has been their job or perhaps they made it really high level in sport. Most of the people that I'm getting to come on to this show is really just to share how the love of sport at any level doesn't have to end and that there are so many ways to enjoy it. And I guess you guys are a example now for your son, which is going to be so helpful when he transitions into teenage years, having four teenagers at home myself right now. I'm ready to die. Yes, feel sorry for me. And Lisa, just to throw that on, what you guys didn't know is I just had knee surgery. So I'm out of action right now. So my children have to do stuff for me. That's

SPEAKER_02 18:40

my worst nightmare. that is my idea of torture

SPEAKER_00 18:43

yeah so be totally inactive at the moment but you know as you know injuries is part of sport in saying that with you two doing this work to get to where you had to for the world champs for your age group how you guys we're not getting any younger how are you managing it with both age and your bodies and recovery time and then you're going and working a full time job we don't we're not training like pros anymore but what are your tips for everybody listening to keep looking as good as you guys do and Tom I'm primarily talking to Nikki but I know you're awesome but out of the two I can Nikki you're fire like you look so fit so amazingly fit and I'm so like jealous when I see it jealous in a love way like she looks amazing so what has been some of the tricks that you guys could share to just you know weekend warriors doesn't have to be ex-pros it could just be anybody listening diversity

SPEAKER_01 19:50

having a diverse spectrum of sports that you can do whether it's yoga pilates running being in the water having your salty blessing um tennis just having a huge assortment of sports that you can actually do when you can't do other things is so important like i I'm forever looking at people who've had surgery or had an injury and they've only ever done one sport and then suddenly they're stuck. They don't know what to do next. And then I'm thinking, you can do this. You may not be able to use your legs, but you can actually use your arms. And I remember I had an example for me would be a couple of years back before I met Simon, the base of the blender, the heavy, heavy machine part of the blender fell off the kitchen counter and landed on my foot and displaced the ligaments in my toes. And I'd been running so much up until that point. And I couldn't run for about three months. Nobody could fix what was happening in my foot. So I got straight into the pool and I went from an Irish swimmer to a mid-range Australian swimmer. We have a well-known swimming coach here, JR. I'm sure you've heard of him. And I remember one day I turned up at the pool and he said, who are you? I said, at the time I was Mickey Morley. And he said, where are you from? I said, Ireland. He said, no chance. And I was like, what? And he said, no hope. You've only ever had one chance. Irish swimmer we know what happened to her and I was like oh gosh that was Michelle Debrun in the 1996 Olympics

SPEAKER_03 21:16

yes

SPEAKER_01 21:17

so I just persevered through swimming and I just started swimming like with a whole heap of girls that were good swimmers just kept pushing and pushing and pushing and then I started getting really good at it then the pool closed for a renovation for like eight weeks I was like what am I going to do now it was winter in Noosa and I didn't want to swim in the ocean I started going to a Pilates studio and I just went straight into that and I could do like heaps of hip bridges and banded work. And I got stronger doing that. And then suddenly I could start running again. The pool reopened and I just merged all of them and then realized that the Pilates was helping my swimming and was helping my running. So I realized if something were to happen to me again, I'd have a backup plan. I just think if you have a diverse range of sports and you don't focus on one thing, like just running or just swimming or just tennis, then I think you're going to be set up for life.

SPEAKER_00 22:11

It sounds like all you need is a plan B.

SPEAKER_01 22:14

Lots of

SPEAKER_02 22:15

plan B's. I said

SPEAKER_01 22:16

this to Belinda yesterday on a run and she said, I need a plan B, C, D, E, F, G and she went all the way down the list.

SPEAKER_00 22:23

One of the things that I keep seeing coming over and over again for you guys, and I think there's a really powerful message behind it, is you seem to incorporate now a lot of your sporting activities with a social side. Would that be accurate? I

SPEAKER_02 22:39

was going to say exactly the same thing. It's the same for Archer. I think that's a big part of the consistency. What helps to make it work is if there's a community involved and there's connections that you're going to have, it just makes it that much easier. easier. You know, as a triathlete, you're always going to have some niggles or injuries. You know, that's kind of what you do as a triathlete. So, you know, the fact, you know, the ability to kind of still turn up and get something done in some capacities, so much more beneficial than just skipping it all together and missing it. And so that social connection, it's a big thing for Nikki. Nikki would rarely go for a run on her own. She's always got some girlfriends to go and meet with her, you know, whatever whatever whether it's morning or evening um you know she goes to studio because she's got a community of people people there and um and i see that in you know with anytime fitness as well like um you know often just people people could work out at home but they don't because it's super hard you know you don't necessarily need to even have a conversation but if you turn up and just that bit of acknowledgement someone maybe sees you a bit of a high eyes bit of a nod you know that may be the most interaction they get all day you know and that's all that all that all that you need so um i think it's It's huge. And I definitely see that's something that Archer picks up. You know, he comes to CEOs and he's interacting with adults and other people as well. You know, he's engaging with them and it's just, you know, that builds values. It builds character and personality, I think, which is, you know, beneficial, you know, beyond just, you know, however you're going to perform in any single sport.

SPEAKER_00 24:16

I think that, you know, some really excellent points there because often when people think about trying to get fit and the– it can be a daunting process, particularly if you've got to do it alone. And, but then there's also the flip side to it. If those people are unfit and they don't necessarily want to be around people who are fitter than them, maybe like sliding into an anytime fitness, this is giving Tomo, Tomo's the managing director of anytime fitness in Australia. So we're just giving them massive plug right now. So I guess having somewhere to go before, if you don't even have a community so having like an anytime fitness to go somewhere and then slowly trying to create your own community around like-minded goals so I know that you shared with me a picture of another couple who look like they did that event with you um is that so would you say that a lot of your friend group are all connected in sport as well

SPEAKER_02 25:18

yeah absolutely and I think it all it all ties together I think if you want to look good and feel good. I think the people you surround yourself with, I think when you're happy, you feel a part of something, if you're in love, you've got balance in all roles of your life, that's when you're able to find that you can actually make some gains and improvement and be at your best. I think for us, we've always found the community that's been involved in our sports and our exercise has been just who we gravitate to it's part of what we do like they're like-minded people that feel the same way that we do and so you just get energy from from from that and yeah there's there's benefits that carry over into every part of your life when you when you have that

SPEAKER_01 26:09

and also that energy expands beyond our group as well because of our community here in noosa i think a lot of people just pick up on that energy when we go to the coffee shop and we see another group of people that do go to our yoga studio or i do a bit of running they they automatically feel like oh we we're so inspired by everything that you do but we just make sure that um yeah people are inspired but not they don't think that we're completely obsessive about what we do that it's that we do for love and for fun rather than

SPEAKER_02 26:42

actually winning more and yeah and i know more better than anyone that you know that it can be intimidating and it's going to be really difficult to get to get started and You know, as I said, consistency is the most important thing. And if you just feel like you're included and it feels like a place that's safe and you feel like you're not being judged, then that's what's going to allow you to turn up more regularly and make that sort of the next step that you need to take.

SPEAKER_01 27:12

I also feel like trying to encourage people to believe that they can do it themselves.

SPEAKER_03 27:16

I've

SPEAKER_01 27:17

got an 81-year-old. I call her my Aussie mum. She's an Australian lady that I used to swim with and she's fairly active and I've adopted her as my my own mom I told her we're going to do this high rocks event together she's like oh what is this and I said don't worry you won't need to do much you just need to make sure you're with me for the whole two hours or whatever however long so she's pretty excited about doing that next year as well that'll be funny

SPEAKER_00 27:42

oh that's super cool so and you guys did this big event in Chicago um but what is next for high rocks for you two

SPEAKER_02 27:51

Well, I did another race in Sydney three weeks later and I qualified for the next world champs, which are in Stockholm next June. So that

SPEAKER_00 27:59

was kind of good. Is that as couples or is that individuals? So that's individual?

SPEAKER_02 28:03

Yeah, so I've qualified as an individual. So, yeah, we haven't really decided if we're going to try and do it again as a team. Oh, you didn't say that last week.

SPEAKER_01 28:13

I'll change my mind again.

SPEAKER_02 28:15

All right, looks like we're going to try and do it again as well. That's all good. But, yeah, so, I mean, I find that... doubles events way more fun than the solo one. The solo one's quite difficult, but yeah, doing it as a team is much more enjoyable. And yeah, so that's on the card. So if we can do a race in December in Melbourne, hopefully qualify and then hopefully try and go over to Stockholm next year. That'd be the big sporty goal. But yeah, really just getting through life as it is, is the main thing. Life is busy and so we just want to live our best lives as much as we can. we can. So, yeah, working with one another, supporting one another so that we can both get the most out of it. That's what we're really trying to do.

SPEAKER_00 28:59

Now, being as like fun and dynamic as you both sound and are, and I, you know, as someone who I, just so the listeners know, I kind of stalked Simon's Instagram page a little bit. I'd always, you know, and I don't want to say that I am a stalker because all of a sudden all my followers are going to disappear. But listen, guys, I do study humankind So I am quite interested when I see people's, maybe I spend more than the average four seconds of what people spend on looking at me. And so everybody can relax. That is seriously how long people spend looking at Instagram, between 1.5 seconds to four seconds. So we spend so much time going, oh my God, have I got a double chin? But nobody's looking at that.

SPEAKER_03 29:45

They

SPEAKER_00 29:46

are just going by so fast. But one thing I did notice with with you, Nikki, is you've got incredible abs. And

SPEAKER_03 29:55

biceps.

SPEAKER_00 29:56

Yeah, well, just the works. I mean, for those of you who can't see Nikki, Nikki is this beautiful petite blonde, if you're not watching this on YouTube, but she has this ripped six-pack. I mean, she puts Tomo to shame. Tomo just might as well go sit down because she really is the star. And so when I was getting these guys on for the interview, it was actually Nikki that I was really targeted but Nikki how do you get that washboard stomach for you know for your age which is still very young in the 40s but you honestly look like you're about 20

SPEAKER_03 30:36

oh thank you

SPEAKER_00 30:38

so where does that I just want a couple of tips on how I could get a six-pack looking like that I

SPEAKER_01 30:43

don't know like as it would I'd say the Pilates would help okay but

SPEAKER_00 30:50

I think

SPEAKER_01 30:50

I certainly don't do it for appearances. It's more for functionality. I've always been of the belief that if you've got a strong core, you've got a strong back. And my dad has had back issues. He's got a slight bit of scoliosis. But I don't do a million sit-ups in the living room every day. It's just, I don't know, maybe I just engage my core a lot more than normal. But Pilates is very, very effective.

SPEAKER_00 31:16

Running helps a

SPEAKER_01 31:19

lot.

SPEAKER_00 31:20

I'm just going to be writing them all down.

SPEAKER_02 31:23

She's really good. She really enjoys the cleaning and she turns the cleaning into a workout. And so, yeah, like she really gets into the vacuuming.

SPEAKER_00 31:32

Cleaning is a workout. Where I first spotted the abs was when Nikki was cleaning a window.

SPEAKER_02 31:36

There you go.

SPEAKER_00 31:37

Yeah. And I saw the abs and I was like, hello.

SPEAKER_01 31:40

Okay. We've just come home from Thailand.

SPEAKER_03 31:44

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 31:44

And I just washed the car. I'd taken the dog for a walk to the beach. I'd just come back in my bikini. I was exhausted. I'd put a mask on my face and didn't know you were sitting inside a dark room so I could even see what he was doing and there I just get into cleaning windows and vacuuming leaf blowing is my thing I

SPEAKER_00 32:02

love leaf blowing um I'm actually loving that you say this because um all of this all these like little side things are actually what I try to encourage my athletes to do as part of neuroplasticity exercises so if you're doing highly competitive sport uh another way to like activate a different part of your brain is to do stuff like cleaning gardening and that actually can stimulate a new neural pathway and it does actually contribute to relaxation believe it or not because you're getting another outlet so hearing that Nikki got her abs through cleaning all of a sudden my house is going to be amazing

SPEAKER_01 32:43

right it's definitely my meditation

SPEAKER_02 32:46

yeah it's a mindset

SPEAKER_01 32:47

yeah

SPEAKER_02 32:48

you can hate it or you can choose to love it and Nikki just Makes it a workout and gets stuck into

SPEAKER_00 32:55

it. Well, you're very impressive, Nikki, and even more impressive than your abs and your cleaning meditation is the fact that you're also, you're a step-mom to Archer, who's 11. And having had many athletes who have been in families where you've got multiple parents, and sometimes that can be tricky sometimes. But we often over-neglect how hard it can be for the actual person who's having to step into the role of being a step-parent. Can you speak to that and share what it's, you know, what that dynamic is like and some of the challenges that come with that?

SPEAKER_01 33:36

Yeah. So when did I come into autism?

SPEAKER_03 33:40

Six years ago.

SPEAKER_01 33:40

When you turned five.

SPEAKER_03 33:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 33:42

Just turned five when we first met and I was basically handed this ball of energy like energy that you cannot even bottle. It was challenging at first because there was no, couldn't speak to him because he'd just go off and do his little thing. He wanted to go camping in the back garden at nighttime. He's so independent and so rough and ready, loved walking barefoot everywhere. He'd stub his toe, lose his toenail, wouldn't even cry. That's the type of child I was dealing with. At first, because he was so active and so willing to get out there and do things, I was like, oh, this is kind of cool boisterous little kid but as time went on and he's going from one family to the next and coming back to us I felt like I was a third wheel for a long time when we first got together the borders closed because of COVID and we were stuck in Queensland and we were able to go and do what we wanted to do out in the community but Simon wasn't travelling to Sydney all that much so he was home and how Having me there, and I think subconsciously Archer might have been thinking, I've had my dad for X amount of years on my own, and I think he and I just battled for Simon's attention. While it was great for me to have Simon home, I was in a brand new relationship and just wanting to invest everything into this relationship, but I was having to deal with this little challenge. But you can't help but love this kid. He is incredible. And as a good friend of mine said it to me recently, it was almost genius. She said to me, you can love them, but you don't need to like them every single day. And I said, oh, I need to just remind myself that. Yeah. And over the last two years, Simon suddenly slowly had to start traveling back to Sydney for work. So he'll go back down for a couple of days. And it's given Arthur and I an opportunity to actually spend time one on one and to connect. And I think deep down, he reminds me of me. the little things that he does, the type of energy that he has, like he's wanting to do one thing one minute and another thing another minute. And I think because I've got so much energy, I can keep up with him.

SPEAKER_03 36:02

And

SPEAKER_01 36:03

I can almost predict what he's going to do next or what he wants to do next. So when he comes home from school, I know he'll want to go and kick a ball outside or he wants to go to the skate park. So I'm already one step ahead of him and thinking, okay, the end of this is that he's burning up a lot of energy. Let's reward him with going to the creperie downtown and having a little dessert or going out for sushi and then he and I just started forming this incredible bond and then when Simon started coming back he was a third wheel and suddenly it went from Archer saying calling out for dad all the time he'd always come to me first and he'd know that I'd say no first like if you wanted to buy anything or want to do something sometimes I get a little bit strict and I'm like well you haven't done your homework today I need you to do this before you can go and do that whereas Simon's a little bit more lenient. But I think Archer loves the fact that I have set him up for success almost every day. He goes to school and everything is packed. And I know I need to break away from that, but I want him to have the best day at school and be the best version of himself. I was a lot worse than he was at school. I was the kid that used to get sent off into the next classroom and stand at the corner, face in the corner for talking in class, or I'd come home and I'd have to write lines. I must not talk in class. and get my dad to sign it. So I'm like, I don't want Archer to ever be that kid. So I'd always tell him stories about what I used to do. And I always say, don't do it though. Right. He absorbs everything, but he always tells me my own stories back to me, which is kind of cute. Yeah. So yeah, he's definitely become my little best friend and rather than just a stepson, but it's not easy for me many stepmoms I don't know too many stepdads but I've got a lot of friends who are stepmoms who are slowly opening up to me and they tell me their challenges and I'm like oh I'm going through that too and I believe it will get better but it's got to get worse as well like they're going to go through the teenage years the boys are going to be boys I don't know who's better girls or boys but if you're on the same page as them and if you have an understanding and listen to them and just love them unconditionally even though he's not my I feel like occasionally he kind of looks like me. He's got same color hair. He wants to wear my clothes and my shoes. I'm

SPEAKER_00 38:25

like, yeah,

SPEAKER_01 38:26

this is winning.

SPEAKER_00 38:27

Well, you guys have created this amazing family unit. And well, I'm really grateful that you were able to share that, Nikki, because I just personally, as a mom of four kids and three of them are teenagers at the moment, and one is even older. She's doing her last year in college. So I have a graduating single. in college, a graduating senior in high school, and then two freshmen in high school. And I hope, Nikki, I hope this makes you feel better. I am their mom and they still don't like me. So like there are some days that they do, but I think the attitude that you guys have about keeping sport and just being active part of your life does give you an outlook to be able to connect with young people when they're feeling, even though We did it all. We've been there, done that. They don't want to hear it. All I get from my kids today is, mom, in your generation, it was like I didn't have running water in my generation. Or maybe I took the horse and cart because they just think I'm so far removed from knowing anything. But I'm still out there going to this sport, being active with them. And I think that can be used as a way to connect. Because what I'm hearing from you guys is that you have both very different parenting styles. Is that true?

SPEAKER_02 39:54

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, somewhat. I mean, Nikki's just, she's so organised. She does really set him up for success. You know, he's got ADHD and he's not the most organised kid at all. He forgets and loses everything. And so Nikki really does make sure that he's got, you know, everything and tries to help him to get his routines going so he can be on top of it. And I mean, Nikki went to a boarding school so she's you know she's grown up with it you know being quite quite strict and and things like that whereas my parents kind of um yeah they just gave us the freedom to have the responsibility ourselves and so I kind of wanted to um develop that sense of independence and responsibility as as well so um yeah it's just a balancing act I don't think we ever find that we're competing interests at all like it's just different different styles at different times and um yeah as I said we're all we're all figuring it out as we go along.

SPEAKER_01 40:49

Both being involved is, and even though we've got our different ways of doing things, as long as we're both involved, you'd hate to have one parent who's just the parent and the other one is not there. Right. And I mean, we're both so good at connecting in general. So I think for us, Archer feels connected with me and the way I do things and with him, the way he does things. And just as long as that connection means love and he's protected, I think hopefully come back to us in a few years and see how he is in his teenage years that could be part two

SPEAKER_02 41:21

but you're right though I think that the step mum is a really tough role step parents are really tough role I don't think they're acknowledged in society as much either and you know for all intents and purposes you know what Nikki does is no different to what you do as a mother as well now that the kids have been born she does every single thing she's there in all the same ways and so yeah it can be a little bit thankless I think and that's not really very fair when you think about how much is is given out and that doesn't necessarily come back in the same way from um not not from not from me certainly but um and archer certainly appreciates it but it's it is different when it's a step-mom to to his real mom and um and i do think in society people don't recognize the the step-parents roles as much as they should do

SPEAKER_00 42:09

no it's i think it's an enormous um role nikki and i am so impressed that you can manage it and um because i I just, if, you know, if I had been in that situation, I'm not in that situation, you know, being with Grant now for 25 years, but had I been in that situation, I think I'd really struggle because I think I'd be like the evil, I think I'd be like the evil mum because I would lose it. Like that's just my, knowing my nature of personality to have, you know, my kids have another mum as well. It takes a very special person to be able to, you know, navigate that role and do it well. So I've always been huge admirers of step-parents because, you know, I can barely do my role as it is, let alone have to step into that role as well, which is even more challenging.

SPEAKER_02 43:05

And even just the fact that, you know, how much do you own the responsibility, right? Like it's not your son, but, you know, it is your son. So it's kind of this balancing act where sometimes it's like, well, I want to be fully in, but then sometimes, well, I'm out, you know, so it's just sort of just constantly dipping in and out process mentally, you know, that I find would be very, very difficult.

SPEAKER_00 43:33

Yeah, I think, you know, for your group of mums, if you guys ever get together and want to do more on putting that out there for other step-parents, I think there's a real need for it, you know, to help that community because I just, having had friends who've gone through a similar situation, situations um it's challenging for everybody it's challenging for the for the youth it's challenging for the the relationship but you guys seem to be like killing it all over the place so maybe you're just you know these amazing role models um so it leads me tomo to ask you a little bit about your work because i'm getting a feeling that sport is everywhere there's almost not a place where sport isn't in your life so you are the managing director of Anytime Fitness in Australia big job um when is your downtime of no sport or is that just that doesn't happen in your household

SPEAKER_02 44:32

yeah it doesn't really happen and interestingly I've just come off the back of I mentioned we had the world championships in June and I sort of had a couple of months sort of off season a bit of downtime and um and I I've actually been feeling awful like I've got to the point sort of I feel like I've detrived over the last two months. And I'm someone that wears a Garmin watch and I track my sleep and my HIV. I'm still kind of nerd out and all of that stuff. And my numbers are terrible. And so even though I'm probably doing more yoga, I'm in the gym, I still probably exercise almost every day I do something. And it's just been fascinating to see that I've had to put more time into work, but my productivity is not as good as it was when I was spending more time training harder. I actually feel better feel more energetic and i i use the time that i've got um better as well so um it's definitely for me it goes really hand in hand you know and so i'm one of those people that um you know i'll get up and exercise every day it gets all of the um everything flowing and going and that sets me up for my for my day and so i can um get get through it and um and be much better for it but um but yeah i mean it's you know there's not a lot of downtime as in spare time like you know it's it's It's pretty full on it. But I've always been that way my entire life. Even as a triathlete, I was not one of those guys that could easily rest and sit around watching DVDs or daytime naps and stuff. I've never been that personality type. I've always been someone that will feel every hour, every minute, every day. And so, yeah, I'm just fortunate that I've got a family and a wife that doesn't see me as being completely off my rocker and crazy. and she supports it and we manage to find the time to do things together and support each other because, yeah, that's what makes us both tick. We're both very much the same in that way. So that's why it works.

SPEAKER_00 46:30

And, Nick, what's your role? So you wear many hats. You're a wife, you're a step-mom, you're this ultra-fit competitor. What else do you do to add to this amazing talent stack that you have?

SPEAKER_01 46:47

Wow. I sing part-time. No, I'm a kitchen. No, I don't really sing. As for work, I'm a graphic designer. You're a graphic designer. Yeah. And I just started at a new company last month, Noosa Radiology. So I get to work with doctors and radiologists, which has been fun. So if I'm ever injured, I can get scans for free.

SPEAKER_00 47:12

Brilliant. We love this. I love the angle. I love how we've already worked with that. Follow our

SPEAKER_02 47:16

passions.

SPEAKER_00 47:17

We've worked with COVID. back into the event this is brilliant um i can i can definitely see why tomo has like aligned himself

SPEAKER_02 47:26

yeah yeah yeah yeah but nicky's been um a graphic designer in the medical field for um probably nearly 15 years now so i'd worked with the same company on contract for a long time and then yeah naturally just found this other role which is um a bit more social and working at home for yourself and so you get the benefits of working with a team and um yeah and that fortunately the hour as suitable for helping support me with my hours that are less suitable as well. So Nikki sort of keeps the household running much, you know, where I fall short in a momentous way. That's why I've got the method. Yeah. All the laundry.

SPEAKER_00 48:05

Yeah. And one thing I want to bring up, because I know, and Nikki, you'll attest to this, Simon will never mention it, but Simon actually placed 10th in the Olympics, which was huge. achievement to come 10th and some of you listening might be going oh well 10th well let me just add that he came 10th still and prior to placing 10th he also had a crash during the bike leg of that event so that is like a phenomenal achievement to finish in the top 10 when you've had something as dramatic as a crash occurred during an event and I'm sure that that hasn't been the only hurdle that you've had to overcome in life so far. What were some other moments that came close to that, Tomo? Even though I'm just waiting for you to go, no, it was actually no big deal. I just got up and I ran because that's the type of guy he is. He's just so chill. But what other things in life have come close to that moment of, okay, I've got to pick myself up, keep going? That level where you had so much focus. You

SPEAKER_02 49:20

know as well, Belinda, when you're playing an elite sport, you lose way more than you actually win. You always remember that you reel off the races that you won, but I've done over 200 triathlons in my lifetime. So I certainly lost a lot more than I won. And so I think what I picked up, you know, I think from being around my family and people close to me is one of my strengths was the ability to kind of of get up and go again quite quickly i didn't sit and dwell in a lot of the failure and they happened more often than not like it was so often when i'd be in great form and then something would happen and didn't get the right whatever it was and in triathlon it can be a whole lot of different things it can just be in an instant can make it can make that difference and you know and elite sport is competitive you know it's you know one percent off you know over a two-hour race will be a minute and so there could be 30 guys finish in front of you um in in in a minute. So you can be so close to having the race of your life. And so, yeah, I mean, the Olympics, you know, was probably one of those things, you know. I'm always really grateful that I crashed twice and, you know, it could have been a flat tyre and that could have been the end of the race, but I was able to get up and the bike was not broken and I could still finish and I ended up having, you know, an equal fastest run on the day as well. So I was still able to get a great performance and something I could be really proud of. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, there's, you know, the back page of the Canberra Times the next day was a giant picture of my face bawling, you know, just crying because, you know, it had been such a build-up. It wasn't just, you know, it wasn't just that one race. It was, you know, years of build-up that go into that. So, but I think, you know, ultimately, you know, there's always something else. And I think what you find in your successes is that they don't actually mean as much as what we think they're going to mean. You know, you're you quite quickly move on to the next thing very, very quickly. So I think if you reframe your life, you know, you're living your life all the time and these little moments, whether you fail or you win, don't actually matter that much. It's who you are in that process and who you're becoming along the way. That's what really matters.