Coaching Brains That Play Differently

What if half your roster processes the game in a completely different way—and that’s not a problem to fix, but an edge to unlock? Coach B sits down with psychologist and coach Dr. “Coach Carey” Heller to rethink how we talk to athletes so they actually hear us, remember it, and execute when the game gets loud.

We dig into the real meaning of neurodivergent in sport—ADHD, autism, dyslexia—and why it’s a difference, not a deficit. Coach Carey breaks down practical upgrades any coach can use today: tighten your language, show the drill, and time your talks after movement so attention is high. On the sideline, skip the running commentary and choose one actionable cue. We also rework the feedback sandwich to protect confidence, and move deep corrections to practice where you can adjust mechanics in the moment.

Film doesn’t need to be a marathon. Learn how to build short, targeted clips that teach one theme at a time, and when to let athletes review solo to lower anxiety and boost retention. We also tackle pressure: mapping triggers, using box breathing, anchoring with mantras, and building simple pre-performance routines that center attention. Along the way, we highlight the power of silence, the value of letting athletes process, and how small, specific praise sustains self-belief.

Whether you coach youth, college, or pros, these tools help every athlete—not just those with a diagnosis. Expect clearer practices, steadier performances, and a stronger bond between coaches and players. If you found value here, share this with a coach, subscribe for more conversations that sharpen your edge, and leave a review with your best one-line game cue—we might feature it next time.

Transcript

Why Coaches Need This Conversation

Coach B 0:15

Hi guys, welcome back to the Plan B podcast. I'm your host, Coach B. Thanks for joining us today. And now, if you're new here, don't forget to go back and check out season one. We have 10 episodes there for you to catch up on. And if you're a regular guys, hey, thanks for your support. We appreciate you. Don't forget to like, share, and subscribe. And most importantly, with today's episode, share it with your coach. Because this whole episode was created to try to help our coaches provide a better coaching communication for you as athletes. So along the same lines, athlete supporting athletes, if your coach or you feel these athletes, you feel like your coach needs to listen to this, send it to them. Okay, because there's a lot of great information that we have in today's show that comes from a very special guest. So I need you guys to just sit for a second while I share some stuff with you. Now, as you know, I was a former pro athlete. I was a former coach. I've been in a lot of former things. I have my own sport psychology practice where I work with athletes holistically, and I've created my own sports psychology program called Athlete Neuroplasticity Reset. And part of that, okay, led me to start my PhD and doing research. And this is how I found these stats, and this is how I found this guest. Okay, so there's lots of good things coming out of some of the work that I'm doing that I am going to share with you guys. And that's what it's all about. It's about supporting you, helping you guys, and helping you have a better experience when you play sport. So hang in there with me because today is going to be great. The studies I found recently, okay, have shown that 40 to 60% of elite athletes may be neurodivergent. Now, if you're hearing this word and thinking, what does that even mean? Neurodivergent, what is that? Well, don't get lost in the words, okay? It simply means your brain is wired differently. Talking about some of the things you may have heard of, like ADHD, autism, dyslexia, conditions where the brain processes information, learns, and communicates in its own unique way. Let's be clear, it's not a disorder. It's a difference, and it's way more common than you think. Now, why I wanted to have this podcast today is because I want to help improve coaching communication to athletes. And when you have such a high percentage of athletes that process information differently, I wanted to find an expert who could help our coaches. And I have, okay, and his name is Coach Carrie, aka Dr. Hella Heller. Okay, so super cool guy and so much expertise, which you are going to benefit from today. But let's put it in real-world terms for us. Coaches, when you're coaching a team of 20, and there's a real chance based on these statistics, that half of the athletes on your roster has a brain that works differently from the coaching textbook and the manual or the coaching course that you just went to. Okay. And here's the thing this is not a weakness. This could actually be a superpower if you know how to communicate the right way. And we only need to look at some of the great athletes whose coaches clearly worked it out. Michael Phelps and Simone Biles have all come out and said they're neurodivergent. Okay, because athletes that are neurodivergent has a brain that thinks differently, often have hyper focused, insane reaction times, and relentless energy. But here's where it gets real for us, okay, and why this podcast is necessary. Most coaching systems were never built for these athletes. And if you don't understand how to communicate with your athletes who maybe fall under this umbrella, as you know, Coach Carey will tell us later, it's not a medical term. It's a term that has been used to create an umbrella over a spectrum of ways that people process information differently. So I thought, well, how about we create a podcast to specifically help our coaches so that they can communicate better with them, motivate their, motivate their athletes better, structure their environment a little bit better. And so the team is not leaving the best performance on the table. And more importantly, we're having a better coach-athlete relationship, which is, you know, going to be better enjoyment for everybody. So let's get dive straight into it. We already started talking. I'm just going to drop you guys into the conversation. Let's connect with our guest today. It's Coach Kerry, aka Dr. Heller. He's a psychologist who specializes in working with ADHD athletes. And he's about to break down how coaches can level up their communication, rethink their approach, and build a culture where these types of athletes don't just survive, they thrive and dominate. Neurodivergent athletes.

Meet Coach Kerry, The ADHD Expert

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 4:32

I mean, I think probably the biggest mistake is, and again, this regards to being neurodivergent or not, the idea is one size is not fit all in terms of how kids and athletes process information. So some may do very well with oral instructions and get it, others may need, you know, maybe very visual and need a visual, you know, illustration of things. And then there's also the attention piece that if a coach goes on and on and talking, and I know it's very easy to kind of, you know, go on and talk for a while, but the problem is the longer you talk, the less people are going to listen.

Coach B 4:56

Right. And I, hey, having been an athlete myself for a long time and also been in environments where I just see coaches go on and on. And the athletes, guys, they're tuning out. And there's every athlete that's listening right now, they're nodding and going, hey, why couldn't we just get straight to the point? So that communication style is really important. So how it's very difficult, um, Carey, when you've got a huge group of athletes and just like in a school setting where it's not necessarily one system fits all, aside from talking less, what else could coaches do to help those athletes with their different learning skills? Because there might be some neurodivergent athletes listening that don't even know that they're neurodivergent.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 5:39

Yeah, well, so I think there are a couple of things. I mean, I think one, again, is obviously trying to keep the verbal piece somewhat short. I think, you know, when you're giving explanations for drills to try to make it as visual as you can. So, for example, you know, setting people up to do a demonstration of it, depending on what it is, if you can have a visual thing like for basketball, having a visual diagram of here's where you're gonna do for this activity. Because then basically you're capturing the people that do well listening and also the ones that do best seeing things. I think sometimes also giving an overview of the of the practice, of these are you know the different things we're gonna work on or these are the activities we're gonna do, sometimes helps because it'll it makes it easier for people to shift from one activity to the next, whereas if they've kind of lost focus, if they have a general sense of overview. It's kind of like when kids are jumping in elementary school, sometimes the teacher has a very like clear, you know, here's the overview of your schedule for the whole day. And so just having that kind of framework with a structure can often help make it easier to then you know, sort of get back on track if you've zoomed out at some point and know what's going on. So I think those things are helpful. One other thing I would think about is really be mindful of when during a practice you talk to you talk to your act, your your team, your team. So the idea that basically if it's the beginning of practice and they're all kind of joking around, you know, that's probably not the time to try to have a serious conversation. But you know, if you can maybe do a few activities to really get them moving, tire them out a little bit, and then take a break, you know, use sort of like a water break and a breather to have a formal, you know, team meeting, that could work really well because they've gotten some energy out and they're probably more likely to be receptive to talking and listening a little bit.

One Size Does Not Fit All

Coach B 6:55

Yeah, there's some really great points there. And I I really hope that some of our coaches listening and athletes, if you think your coach needs to listen to this podcast, you should forward it to them afterwards and just say, hey, politely, you know, coach, I found some really great information. Maybe you should check it out. Because it is, like I said, let's go back to the stats. 40 to 60% of elite athletes may be neurodivergent. So that is athletes who are not zoning out, they're not distracted, but that's how they may be interpreted because they're not able to decipher the information that's coming at them in the way that they normally could exorbit in a session away from sport. So one of the biggest things, uh Coach Kerry, that I see a lot from having standing on the sideline from at a lot of levels, pro level, college level, is in-game communication. Because what I see is that it's a different environment from training. You've got the environmental stresses that are there, the internal stresses of the athletes are heightened. And then you've got coach delivering communication in a less effective way. And one of the things that I see is coaches screaming out mistakes that have already passed and sending the athlete's brain back into recall, and then they've got to keep going. So, how could be to be helpful, not just for neurodivergent athletes, but all athletes, can you help us with that?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 8:12

Sure, absolutely. I mean, I think the first thing as a coach to think about is be intentional what you're saying. Because if whatever you're saying is gonna have no impact whatsoever on anything else that's going on on the field of the court, don't say it in the game. Save that for a you know conversation at a later time. Because, you know, the people on the court, they have or the field, they have to process, you know, if they hear, you know, tons of people talking, you know, probably they're not gonna fully be able to process whatever it is anyway, if there's several different people talking. So the idea is, you know, keep whatever the verbal recommendation or ever do, keep first of all, keep it very short so it's easier to process. And, you know, be really selective in what you choose to say. It's also okay to be silent on the sideline. You don't have to be talking constantly as a coach. So I think also remembering that's important too. Because I think, you know, also think about it this way. If you're not constantly saying stuff on the sideline, whatever you do say is probably gonna have more weight because it's you're not constantly saying things.

Coach B 8:59

100%. And to be honest, I don't think because of the noise off the field, from either the stadium, the crowd, the the athletes half the time can't even hear coach, to be honest.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 9:08

Well that's true too. So it's also it's not helpful a lot of times if they can't hear you.

Coach B 9:12

Right. And so you often see coaches on the sideline, they scream, I was guilty of that when I was a coach. And then I really needed to like calm down, check myself. And I know I had a great mentor, or I've had several great mentors, who have said, you know what, Belinda, you know, keep that in check and just allow it to go through. And timing is so important. Now, a lot of coaches who have done coaching courses have heard about like the feedback sandwich, all right? And we know what the feedback sandwich is, it's where you give a positive, okay, so well done, Jimmy, and then you do a corrective. But next time, just be mindful of where you are on the field and uh keep your hips open so you can turn easily. So corrective, and then followed by a positive to keep them going forward. So let's keep going strong in the second half. So, like you've got this positive feedback sandwich that a lot of coaches are given and told to prescribe to when they go to a coaching course. Do you find that this works well for ADHD and neurodivergent athletes, or is there a better framework that coaches could use?

Make Coaching Visual And Brief

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 10:08

Well, so I think it depends on the person. On a practical level, if whatever you're saying is long enough, the person is gonna have there's an athlete's gonna zone down by the time you get to the other positive on the other end of the sandwich. So I think at a practical level, I think, you know, maybe even just having the the positive thing and then the thing to work on and leaving off the third pot, you know, the end of the sandwich in some ways could actually work better because it's less information. So I think there's I think there's part, I think that's part of it. But I also think recognizing, you know, just because you tell an athlete something doesn't mean they're immediately gonna follow it. So it's often most helpful to share the information, like for example, during practice when you can actually work on something. Like, for example, baseball. If you're working with an athlete on mechanics for throwing, you know, that's a good time to actually work on you know giving feedback when they're actually doing it, and you can work with them if they're not doing it the way that they should be. You know, I think one of the things I would just think about with this idea of giving feedback is really the idea that, you know, people with ADHD often are very used to getting a lot of you know criticism and kind of feedback on or what people refer to as a correction. And so the problem is that, you know, if you're continuing to give feedback from like a sports perspective, if someone's not doing something the way they should, just you know, using basketball or baseball as an example of throwing the ball, you know, like a coaching technique in theory is the idea that you're supposed to keep you know repeatedly correcting the person until they do it correctly because of the fact that you know they're gonna learn how to do it properly. The problem is if they're not making a change, then it impacts their self-esteem. And then so that's where I think, especially for youth athletes, you really have to draw the line between deciding when do you keep sort of pushing someone and reminding them to try to improve change versus letting it be in the moment if they're not making a correction, but to also recognize even small attempts. Like to them, it's a real attempt, even if you don't see much of a difference. If there's some difference you see, praising that can also really help a lot.

Coach B 11:38

Right. And and maybe even doing like a little bit of postscript in your brain to go, hey, that's something that I'm going to address in practice during the week. But right now, in the moment, with an athlete and or any athlete, but it more importantly, if it is an athlete who has ADHD or who is neurodivergent, don't forget, coaches, if you're listening right now, they're also extremely they they're sensitive and they have they have heightened, kind of receptive to noise, lights. That's what comes with part of having a brain that thinks differently. So while you're kind of shouting out your corrective feedback and you're not getting it, and the athlete's getting maybe a tiny bit of it, but it's not perfect. I, you know, Coach Carey, would you be with me and just say kind of count your losses and just hold on to what you do have because this is an athlete who's also really highly stimulated and it's not probably the best learning environment at that moment.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 12:26

Yeah, no, I really agree with you. I mean, when it comes down to it, you know, I would hope that most coaches also really want to focus on the athlete as a person, not just in the sport. And basically they're also not going to excel in the sport, you know, if their self-esteem is so poor. So really it's a win-win for them as an athlete and as a person to sort of be mindful of their self-esteem when you're correcting someone during that. And also to your point about you know being extra sensitive, I would also think about that in terms of how a coach singles out a player if they're giving feedback. And you know, for some players, if they seem especially sensitive, it may be better if you can to try to do it one-on-one. Like if it's during, you know, water break or after practice or before practice, like dazzling is gonna feel a lot more comfortable than being singled out in front of the whole team, you know, with some sort of correction.

Coach B 13:11

Right. And honestly, and I think every little tip that we can give athletes is really helpful because, you know, they're everyone, every single one of them is running their own movie in their head. Okay, they've got a lot of things that they're thinking about on top of just, hey, I've got to execute what coach says to me. The athletes are also processing, okay, you know, my girlfriend Susie is also gonna be in the crowd, my peers are gonna be there. So they've also got that kind of distraction in their brain as well. And that's just normal kind for for young adolescent athletes. So I love these practical takeaways that you're giving us. Now, one of the things that all teens tend to do, and I, you know, I used to do it as well as a coach, and I don't know how particularly helpful it is, or maybe you can give a better way, a creative alternative. But let's talk about post-game or post-performance film sessions. You know, if I'm an athlete with ADHD, or you know, and I often see athletes that are just who who don't have ADHD are just completely spaced out and really aren't absorbing the what coach is trying to do. Is there a creative alternative to this, to post-game film?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 14:11

Sure. I mean, on a practical level, I probably I mean, I assume you're not referring to it right after game, you just mean in general after at some point, right?

Coach B 14:18

Yeah.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 14:18

I mean, I'm sure there are some teams that may view it right after, but that for others, I think that's not great because you're still sort of, you know, probably wound up from the game. It's kind of like the idea of the the car ride, oh, that, you know, not talking about the game and you know, upsetting the athlete, you know, until they've had time to kind of cool off a little bit can be really helpful. So I think, you know, they're not gonna be as receptive right away to feedback when they're looking at the film. The thing though is thinking about like what do you want, what is like anytime you're doing anything, whether it's you know, looking at film or some practice, for a coach, think about what is the goal? What are you trying to accomplish by showing them the film? And so the thing would be to then look at, you know, one, could you, you know, with AI, I think there's probably a lot of ways to streamline this in terms of the time involved, would be to look at could you pull more clips? So rather than it being, you know, a whole, like, let's say a whole football game, look at could you just pull you know a couple of like clips that really illustrate the points you're trying to make? Or like almost like a highlight reel and have them watch that. Because one, you could spend more time actually doing stuff instead of watching if you're not spending as long watching the film. Plus also people are gonna zone out, you know, watch watching too many too much at once. And I think break it down. Like, for example, like for an older teen, if let's say, I don't know, there's you're I mean again, I certain sports I think intend to use the film more than others, but even in like let's just say baseball, for example, if you you know have a teen athlete, you know, or coach and you're filming, you know, how what their at bat looks like or their form and their pitching, you know, having a couple different sort of examples to show, you know, depending on how many times they're up to bat, and obviously they're sure pitch a lot if you're if they're a pitcher, but but the idea of like not showing them every single pitch they did, but you know, selecting a few to show, oh, here's you know this is an example of you know, you did a really good job here. And here's where, you know, your your feet, you know, you didn't do a good job in terms of, you know, your your folk work, or you released it a little bit too soon. Like to basically show like what work what's looking really good with things and also kind of like this idea of the sandwich, but doing the video. I mean, one other thought too, and again, I have mixed feelings on this, I think it depends on the person, but there can be times where for some people, if it's short enough, being able to view it on their own has value because they could view it when that you know, one they could review it multiple times themselves and they could do it, you know, and it may feel better not watching in front of other people. Because it's also another piece of it, is if you're analyzing your gameplay in front of the entire team, that's may feel absolutely in general, that may feel very stressful and you know leads some challenges, you know, being a terms of self-esteem if they're feeling you know they're being criticized in front of the whole team and stuff that's on video.

Smarter In-Game Communication

Coach B 16:27

Yeah, oh yeah, 100%. Particularly if you've had an absolute shocker.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 16:30

Oh, you know. The hard part is that obviously if, you know, on the other hand, if you're giving someone film to watch on their own, it's another task that to keep track of and complete. But you know, for some that might feel better, at least do it on their own, they can pause it and restart it. So again, there's certain things where, and you could actually do that even for like short little tips on things, you know, especially for people to ADHD that may have a hard time focusing. If there's certain things you really want, you know, your team to know, you therapy could sort of make, you know, really short videos and just, you know, send it to the team on occasion between stuff if there's really something that's important enough for them to know, and you think that that might help them to learn it better than simply just listening to you during practice.

Coach B 17:02

Yeah, and you know, I want to, I want to talk a little bit uh, because I I love these little tips and takeaways. And particularly when you said, hey, parents, even post-game. I mean, post-game normally, they don't normally do film straight after, they normally do it like a day or a little bit after, but even just that car ride let the athlete to decompress. And I've said this before on other podcasts, and then in the film, you know, whether it's condensed, whether it's particular reels, whether it's just very specific, using the sandwich method, which uh we've spoken about, these are all fantastic because in your experience, Coach, over the last, you know, you've been doing your uh psychology practice for the and this specific area of work for the last 15 years, okay? And quite extensively, and when you go on to Carrie's website, which I will list on the Insta page, you can see all of the papers and things that he has written and he's been involved in this. So he's been in this field quite a substantial amount of time. One of the things I want to hit on today, because a couple of episodes, I did, you know, an episode on, hey guys, let's just not scroll before a competition because we're trying to minimize the distraction. Would you say, in your experience of what you've seen over the years, that the level of distractability, and we're we're gonna just talk athletes because that's our field right now. Do you think the level of distractability has increased? And what are the causes of that?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 18:20

Sure. Yeah, I mean, I think in some ways it probably has. I mean, again, I think there's certainly the aspect of technology and that, you know, it certainly can help people to need, you know, more of like an instant gratification for things. And, you know, certainly there's studies that look at, you know, how that impacts attention span. So I think there's that piece of it, I think certainly it seems like there's an increase in anxiety. I think there's an increase in pressure for athletes in games, you know, whether it's concerns around getting recruited, or just what are your parents going to think? You know, I think that all those different pressures tend to create, you know, more sort of anxiety properly before games for a lot of people, on top of their own internal, you know, self-imposed kind of pressure that put, you know, a lot of athletes put on themselves. And I think right before a game, you know, again, there's some some athletes, I'm sure, that you know, basically are you know excited and ready to go and just want to jump right in, but others that maybe feel a lot of anxiety right before, and it's heightened because they're not in the middle of the game yet, so it's not taking their mind off that, and they know that it's coming. Again, I think it also depends on the sport in different aspects. I mean, baseball is different where, you know, depending on what your role is, I mean, certainly sometimes you're on the bench waiting to bat, so you're not really doing anything. But that idea of you know being on deck to bat and kind of the anticipation of you know you're next, you know, unless unless the other team gets three outs, or or unless you get the third out before you're up to bat. But then, you know, when you're you're in that batter's box, everyone's eyes are on you.

Coach B 19:27

Right.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 19:28

So that all attention's on you. And, you know, I think that's a lot of pressure under the best of circumstances. But you know, when you know it's you know you need the run to win the game or they're two outs, you know, that adds pressure. I think being a pitcher is certainly because every you know you're involved in every play, you know, the pressure that you I think the other positions in baseball are not always as you know, certain output positions, you know, if your eyes are not on you unless the ball goes to you. So I think that certain positions varies. I think, you know, in the sports basketball or soccer, depending on what your role is, you're often doing you know, doing a lot. I mean, if you're the goalie in soccer, certainly, you know, when the ball's coming to you, it's you know, you have a very vital role. But, you know, if the team's doing well and the ball's not coming near you very much, you're kind of just standing around and you know, you need to be ready, but there may not be as much pressure.

Coach B 20:07

Right. And, you know, the the topic of pressure, and I'd love you to speak on this. I often tell my athletes to lean into it. I mean, come on, we're we're either we're highly competitive athletes, we're there. I I mean, I I get that we roll out the line that everybody participates and that it's we're there for participation, but come on, real athletes, and uh that's everybody who plays sport is some type of an athlete. They're there to win. Okay, so pressure is gonna be there in any form. And I've always said to minor athletes, lean into it, embrace it. What would you say to that?

Rethinking The Feedback Sandwich

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 20:40

I think it depends. So, I mean, I think there's an acknowledgement of it that's important. And I think as kids get older, I think acknowledging more that, you know, what what the goal is. And that I think certainly there's, you know, I think everyone wants to win, but I think the idea of that not being the be-all and end all, I think is also really important. But but I think this question of kind of leading into the pressure, the problem is that, you know, a lot of people can sort of like it's like the stress. A small amount of stress can be beneficial in improving performance. The problem is too much stress or too much pressure and people and some kids people crumble. So I think you have to figure out how much pressure you're experiencing. Is it a good amount that's pushing you to do well, or is it so much that it's impacting your performance?

Coach B 21:15

So I'm putting you on the spot here. And I listen, I know that you're you're an expert in this field. If I'm that athlete who is just trying to alleviate some pressure that I'm feeling, what could I do?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 21:27

I mean, the first thing is to try to identify what is the trigger. So, like, is the pressure like just right before the game? Is it during a certain point of the game based on what's going on? Because understanding like the trigger is often the first step towards trying to get better, because then you can figure out how best to approach it. So maybe, you know, so like a box breathing activity or like some sort of positive self-talk, like having a short phrase you can remind yourself of. Another thing can also be useful sometimes is having like a step routine to do. Like, so for example, I don't know, like a volleyball, for example, like before you, you know, someone serves. Like basically, if you have like I used to like take a couple steps back, you know, like I take four steps back. And so it got me to like focus on doing something rather than thinking about all the eyes on me serving. And you know, that and functional add alone serves, so it helped I need to be a few steps back feedback from the line. But the point is that basically, like a lot of athletes have routines because they're helpful in taking away that pressure as so you can focus on using the routine as a way to gain control over the situation. And feel better.

Coach B 22:17

Yeah, you know, and I had to just have this great conversation with one of my athletes on the weekend, and he is actually he's a basketball player, and he's actually the first person that everybody listened to when this Plan B podcast was launched. Okay, and that's Anthony Lamb, and he is overseas right now and he's playing. And, you know, he we were talking about him processing coach information sometimes that he doesn't necessarily agree with, but he needs to be able to decipher or or or he thinks in his head, but I think the play should be run this way. But you know, when you're an athlete, guys, I'm always saying to this, you you're a team with your coach, and your coach is has a strategy, and whether or not you feel you can run it better another way, it's really important to take on board what coach is saying and process what coach wants you to execute. So a tip that he uses is that to stay in the moment and to not allow his thoughts to run away with, hey, I think it should be done this way, but to absorb the information and he just says to himself, where are his feet? Like, and he looks at his feet and he looks down to stay where he is and not be distracted by other thoughts or thinking, no coach, I think we could we should have done it this way or maybe a little bit better. And just sit with the information and allow it to like permeanate in you and and look down at your feet so you're kind of not looking anywhere or or at coach's expressions or what are other athletes doing, and just listen because listening, I think, is is something that people don't do enough of today. Um would you say that that is that's fairly accurate?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 23:41

Yeah, like I think it's also the mentality of, I mean, again, you want to speak of, you want to be able to sort of have your voice heard, but I think there's also a time and a place to do it and a time when you need to sort of just if listen to whoever's in charge unless whatever they're saying is like inappropriate or something to be doing.

Coach B 23:54

Yeah, it exactly. And and now, or just flipping back to the coach side, because I really want coaches to get, you know, takeaways uh from today. One thing I've noticed with working with myself, working with adolescent athletes and and young adults is that their processing function is different from an adult or from a coach. And so when you get those lengthy pauses from adolescents, when you've said something, you don't necessarily need to fill it. Is that something that you would agree with?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 24:21

Um Yeah, because some people also take a longer time to process things than others. And if they're processing something and you just start filling the time because you don't want the silence, they may get distracted and not neuralize whatever you've just said.

Coach B 24:33

100%. So, guys, be okay with once you've said an instruction and even though you're expecting feedback, sometimes you won't always get it. So, you know, we're learning today from research that the adolescent brain, and it sounds crazy because it's a big number, that the adolescent brain isn't completely formed, like we're talking neuroreceptors and neurotransmitters all connecting until age 30 now. It keeps going back. Okay, so you know, 30 is a pretty old adolescent, I've got to say. But that's the research that we're coming back with. So just be okay if you don't get that instant response or you don't get that feedback. Just allow them to sit with it. And I think the great thing that you really mentioned today is all about timing of delivery of when you want information from your athletes, perhaps curate that in a way that uh allows the athlete time and space, like create a space for athletes to be able to do that.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 25:23

Right, no, exactly. Because I think that really makes a difference because then they're going to process what you've said better and understand it and retain it rather than just, you know, in one ear out the other.

Film Sessions Without The Fog

Coach B 25:31

Exactly. And you know, and hey, I get that, you know, we are becoming more aware of all the things, you know, it it feels like autism is a word that's people speak of a lot. And and ADHD is something that uh a lot of people have come forward and said, yes, I've been diagnosed with that. And perhaps to be honest, even though I'm I'm not a huge fan of labels, perhaps it's always been there and now we just have a heightened awareness of that. And we certainly can see that if we look in just mainstream media, I was just talking to Coach Kerry before we came on and said that yesterday in Sunday's New York Times, okay, so it was Sunday, the 8th of March, there was on the front page, there was a story about how co colleges in the US have had an increase of up to 50% of students who are applying, requesting disability allowances. And on that spectrum, ADHD and autism have been right up there. So perhaps with this heightened awareness that obviously colleges have, and they're making the adaptations to help people to be able to just function better because we're not all, you know, one model fits all. I I think that knowing it's on such a broad scale, just to be able to say to coaches, hey, coaches, we want you to have an awareness of this because it we're not making it up. You know, could you speak like to that and about just how this growing influence and awareness?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 26:50

Sure. Then I think there is certainly more, there's certainly more awareness that these, you know, these chap challenges exist and that you know there's certainly more support that people are trying to do in order to sort of compensate and you know, help people, you know, with ADHD, autism, other things, you know, anxiety, various other things that will qualify in terms of you know seeing accommodation at the college level. But I think it brings up the point that, you know, if you look at, I don't know, any any sports team, you know, if you're fair coach, any sports team, uh, you know, think about the selected of at least, I don't know, one or two people, if not more, having ADHD or having anxiety. And the idea is by you know better understanding, you know, w what challenges a particular athlete on your team has, you can be more effective in not only helping that person on the team, but helping the whole the team as the whole. Right. And so, you know, while your job obviously, you know, unless you're you know psychologist or medical professional, your goal is that was that you're, you know, and again, even if it's you know, you're not treating the the the athlete in that capacity on the on the field anyway. But the the point is that basically having a better understanding allows you to sort of develop a better relationship with with the players and to be able to better support their needs. So the more information you have for the most part, the more effectively you can help support the needs of of your athletes. And so that's why really getting to know them as a person. And even if they never disclose any formal diagnosis, you probably, you know, by getting to know them well, you can probably pick up on a fair amount if you know what to look for, just in terms of figuring out how can you better support them by understanding how they learn and how they process information and how they react when you give them feedback in a certain way.

Coach B 28:06

Well, I know that, you know, the coaches listening to this podcast today are just gonna get so much out of it. I know the athletes appreciate it, and that's what this is all about. It's about athletes supporting athletes. But if I'm a coaching organization and an athletic department, that I also, like I know my coaches are trying to do their best. I know the athletes appreciate it and they need it. But what are three things a coaching organization or an athletic department could do could do to help support their coaches facilitate this?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 28:32

Sure. I mean, one is to give coaches, you know, some sort of training on these things of what to look for and very practical strategies on on how to support these things. But in general, how to support, you know, sort of a you know, a better approach to communication in general, regardless of any sort of diagnosis. Just, you know, thinking about the idea that it's not just about, you know, how well can you coach baseball or basketball or soccer, but how well can you develop relationships with players and structure practices in a way that, you know, help all kids or you know, use athletes to be able to thrive. So I think just you know, focusing on that perspective, you know, I think so. I think the training I think is really important. I think just generally saying what to look for in terms of how to help kids, you know, when things pop up, I think would be really good as well. And also just recognizing that, you know, so it's the communication that, you know, I think sometimes like the old school version of yelling at kids, you know, for most people does not really work very well. And and that's what I think basically, you know, recognizing that and looking at alternative options, I think is really crucial too.

Coach B 29:20

Yeah. And you know, I've been saying this for some time, and I'm hoping that it we're seeing more and more of a trend is that, you know, the role of a mental performance coach as another ro as another team member in a team, in a organization. So, you know, so you have your you have your strength and conditioning, and then you also have your mental performance, who not only works with the athletes, but could also have a the option to train the coaches as well on the best ways, as you said, with or without a diagnosis, on ways to improve in-game comp communication, to improve the flow of communication, so that the athlete's mental performance, now the at-if the athlete is mentally performing optimally, of course, everything else is going to go in sync. Okay, all the training that they've done during the week is is gonna come through better. But if we don't have and help our coaches to be equipped, and they can't do everything, they're already Uber drivers packers. Like I saw this funny meme the other day on on a coach who said she po she posted like a herself dressed up and everything that she does as a coach. And I I don't know, I'm I'm guessing, um Coach Kerry, you're along the lines of me. I really feel like we've we need to get with today's day and age, you know, 2026, and we should be having mental performance coaches and maybe remove the word psychology because that kind of can put the connotation of, you know, it may be connected to a diagnosis or but really keep it honed in on sport. But let's not just help the athletes, but let's help the coaches.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 30:44

Yeah, no, absolutely. And I think also it's the idea that, you know, sort of if you help, if you help the athletes and the coaches, you know, off the field as well, you're gonna function better, uh everyone's gonna function better on the field too. So, you know, because if the everything's going wrong in the personal life, you know, it's it's gonna be hard to actually function optimally on the field.

Coach B 31:01

Yeah.

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 31:01

So the idea is really like taking care of the athlete as a whole and the coach as a whole can really go a long way towards really increasing the performance on the field.

Coach B 31:08

Yeah. Oh, 200%. And, you know, I take that as like, you know, part of my philosophy and foundation of of you know, working with athletes and then building building teams. So you've been fantastic today. And I know that we could talk for easily talk for for a longer period of time, and there's so much more that you do and you have to offer. And I am gonna put your website at the bottom so that coaches, parents, athletes, if you're listening to this and you want to know more and you want to become better informed on how you can support your athletes. Coach Carey has so much on offer with his website. And what is that website called, just so we can direct people there?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 31:45

Sure, uh Hello Psychology Group.com.

Coach B 31:47

Okay. All right, so you're definitely gonna be able to find that. And so in closing today, I want to just give you some rapid fire questions because I always love this part, just for you to answer. Okay, so let's fire it off. What is one myth about neurodivergent athletes that you wish would disappear?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 32:06

But they're all good at sports.

Distraction, Tech, And Rising Pressure

Coach B 32:09

Okay. If you could wait say one thing directly to every coach listening right now on kind of this topic that we've been talking about today, what would it be?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 32:18

Think about the idea of what got what got the athlete interested in the sport in the first place, which is probably having fun to su uh to at least a large part, and the idea of thinking about no matter what level you're coaching at, are are are the players having fun? Because you know, they're gonna function better if they're having fun at as they're working hard.

Coach B 32:34

Oh yeah, I you know, 100%. And if you're enjoying what you do, you're gonna be more motivated, you're going to be more likely to work even harder. If you could say one thing to every athlete, whether they have ADHD or neurodivergent, or or someone that maybe feels like they're struggling in the communication process and then they don't feel like they belong in their sport, or they just, you know, when it comes to execution, you know, they train like a beast during the week and but they get game day or they get under pressure and they're feeling stressed and they're trying to process information that comes at them and they seem to just be missing the mark. What would you tell them?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 33:11

I mean, what I would tell them is if you know you're trying really hard and you're not getting the goal, the goal that you want, to take a step back and really, you know, write this out to look at what are the different pieces of things that you're working at, you know, during the week to practice, what's happening during the game. Because taking that step back outside of the game to look at, you know, where what part of the game are you having a hard time passing information with? Is it the same type of play that depending on the sports that you're struggling with? Because like writing out the actual like steps of where you're having trouble, sometimes can give you new insights into how to make it better. And then also, you know, seeking out appropriate professional support is needed, or you know, really as a starting point, talk to your coach, you know, explain to your coach, this is what I'm this is what I'm doing, this is what you know is happening in the game, this is where we're having trouble. What suggestions do you have on what I could do differently? Because it's that idea that when you take a step back and this goes for stuff outside of sports as well. When you take a step back and really look at what's working, what's not, you that's often how you figure out how to make changes and what changes make. Because you need to take a concrete step to actually make changes, not to say I want to make things better, you know, because you have to have an actual concrete step to what to do in order to accomplish that.

Coach B 34:04

Yeah. And and athletes listening, if you've taken this and you go, right, okay, the first thing I'm gonna do is I'm gonna go talk to coach, just also be mindful of what we said before about timing. You know, perhaps when the coach is just taking a breather from the middle of practice isn't the right time. Find a way to communicate with coach, whether it's you know, via email or whatever your preferred communication process is that's set by the team, reach out to the coach separately from practice to say, hey, I'd like a time to talk. And that way, one, you've got coaches' attention. It's not that you wouldn't have coaches' attention in the moment, but remember that coaches are often processing, they're like you. They're also processing a lot of information as well. They're doing it on the fly and they're also coordinating other staff members as well. So they've got a lot. And it's not that you're what you're trying to say isn't important. It's just that we also have to give coach a little bit of grace and allow them the space. Just like, just like we're asking coaches to create space for athletes, athletes, give your coaches a break and allow them the space and the opportunity to actually reply. So lastly for you, Coach Kerry, is that as a former volleyball player, okay, in what position in volleyball did you play? I know there was all different kinds of, were you a libero?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 35:11

Um I played it, I mean, I guess I did probably back row, I guess.

Coach B 35:16

Okay. Okay. Well, I I was hopeless of volleyball. So I know that we've got some volleyball players uh, you know, listening that will get an appreciation for that. So you've done this journey and clearly you have this interest and you've you've contributing so much to continuing to support athletes. Final thing I want to say is how can athletes, just from your experience in this field, um, how can athletes best support themselves? Because I am a little bit all about allowing athletes to be autonomous and to empower athletes, just like this whole podcast is about empowering athletes. What could athletes do to help themselves?

Dr Heller aka Coach Carey 35:53

I need to really find a good balance in life with the idea that you want to sort of have your time to train, have it planned out, and work hard at it, but you also need to be able to focus on things outside of sports as well and not have sports be 100% of your time. Because I think that you need time to to you know to decompress and relax. And I think having a variety of interests can really help a lot in in terms of making more well rounded, which in turn can make you better at the sport, because then you know, when you're focusing on sports you're giving your role and you don't get it burned out from the sport.