Wellbeing Solutions - Ask A Counsellor

AAC - Relationships - Family Home & Dynamics - Parenting Stress - Q4 (Alessandra)

Wellbeing Solutions Season 4 Episode 1

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0:00 | 2:34

What role does self-care play in parenting?

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Parenting is one of the most demanding roles there is, and it's very easy to put yourself last. Self-care and parenting simply means making space look after your own well-being so you can keep showing up for your family. It's not a luxury or something you earn when everything else is done, as it generally affects how you feel, how you cope and how present you can be. And if you're feeling stretched right now, just pause for a moment and ask yourself, what's one small thing I could do in the next 10 minutes just for me? So not a task, not something for the kids, just something that gives you a brief moment of rest. So that might just be sitting down with a cup of tea, stepping outside for a few minutes, or just closing the door and being quiet for a bit. And now it does sound small, but small and consistent does add up. And one of the biggest barriers to self-care as a parent is a belief that doing something for yourself means you're neglecting everyone else. And it's worth noticing when that thought comes up and gently challenging it. A parent who is exhausted, overwhelmed, and running on empty has very little left to give. And when you attend to your own needs, even in small ways, you tend to have more patience, more emotional capacity, and more ability to connect with your children. And it also helps notice how you speak to yourself, as parents can be their own harshest critics. As if a friend came to you saying they were struggling and feeling like they were failing, you wouldn't just pile on. So try to offer yourself the same tone that you'd offer them. And a few practical steps that can support with this is firstly thinking about sleep. It's one of the most underrated forms of self-care and it directly affects how you manage stress. So think about who's in your corner, as asking for help is not a sign of failing as a parent, and also being specific with people about what you need can make it easy for them to show up for you. And think about what you enjoy before parenting took over, so reconnecting with even one hobby or interest, however briefly, can remind you of who you are beyond your role as a parent. And if your to-do list does feel relentless, write it down as getting it out of your head and onto paper can make it feel more manageable and can help you see what actually needs doing today. And if you're finding that parenting stress is affecting your sleep, your mood, your relationships, or your ability to function on a day-to-day, that's a sign to reach out. And your GP could be a good first step and can refer you to further support if needed, and talking to someone you trust, whether a friend, family member or professional, can also make a real difference, as you don't have to wait until things feel unmanageable to seek support. And for more on this, you can explore the resources available on the app. And if you are thinking about harming yourself and feel unsafe, then please seek urgent help by contacting your local emergency service or a crisis helpline.