Restaurant Server-to-Manager Blueprint (The Leadership Training Nobody Gets)

Server to Manager Training isn’t about learning more menu knowledge or perfecting steps of service… it’s about learning how to think like a leader in a broken system.

In this restaurant manager/leadership training session, we break down what actually separates a high-performing server from someone ready to step into management, operations, or ownership.

To show this, Preston sits down with an experienced Gen Z server who’s trying to figure out her next move, from becoming a stronger server to eventually stepping into restaurant management, leadership, and possibly ownership. The conversation dives deep into restaurant culture, toxic management habits, hospitality standards, emotional control, and what it actually takes to grow in the hospitality industry.

This isn’t surface-level restaurant advice. It’s a real in depth training about what servers deal with every day and how to overcome these tribulations to develop themselves into true restaurant leaders.

Throughout the video, they discuss:
• How to move from server to manager
• Leadership vs management in restaurants
• Handling difficult guests professionally
• Increasing sales and check averages
• Building hospitality culture and accountability
• Why emotional control is a leadership superpower
• Seniority vs performance-based tactics
• How high performers should be thinking about the industry

If you work in restaurants, bars, hotels, fine dining, casual dining, or any restaurant operations, this video will give you practical insight into leadership, personal growth, and career development inside the service industry.

🔥 Reserve your seat at our free training built for the 2026 workforce. Learn the 4-Domino Sequence Behind Every Restaurant Doing $7M+ With 15% Margins, The Proven System That's Scaled 350+ Restaurants By Weaponizing Hospitality and much more!

Reserve Your Seat Here 👉 https://join.30percentrule.com/training

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

So managers are babysitters, they're glorified babysitters. Leaders are someone who makes the company better. A leader is never going to ever, ever, ever give someone a party of 40 and someone else a party of three. I don't even care about favoritism, whatever. If you have entrees that are$76, that is not leadership. Focus on developing yourself, focus on your habits, focus on being the best burden of yourself. I don't think you need to focus too much more on the serving aspect of it. I think what you need to focus more on is your mentality and reaction to things. Understanding what it is, accepting it, growing from it. So today we're gonna be working with an amazing server who has all of her skill sets down. She is killing it already, has a great mindset, but what she wants to do is take things further. What does her future look like when it comes to serving? How does she get into management? What are the next moves? And how does she become an even better server than she already is, right? She wants to learn ways to increase sales, increase uh check averages, increase reviews, all things that she already has high marks in, but how does she get better? Which I loved her open mindset. We're gonna walk through it with her today and see what it's all about. How long have you been serving?

SPEAKER_03 1:05

Eight years.

SPEAKER_00 1:06

Eight years?

SPEAKER_03 1:06

Eight years.

SPEAKER_00 1:07

Oh wow.

SPEAKER_03 1:07

Yeah, this year's my eighth year.

SPEAKER_00 1:09

That's crazy. Yeah. Okay. Um, so we want to work on a couple of things, we want to talk about a couple of things today. And then the whole point is of this is to understand a like a service point of view, right? The struggles that you go through. And one thing I really encourage you to do is be honest. So, with that being said, if you had a magic wand and you can, if a genie came to you with a magic wand and said, I'm gonna give you this magic wand and you can wave it over and change one thing forever, what would it be?

SPEAKER_03 1:38

Standards applying across the board.

SPEAKER_00 1:40

Okay, can you go into a little more detail?

SPEAKER_03 1:42

So, as far as like standards are like what management expects of us and having that apply to all around the employees. So a lot of things that I feel like we struggle with are obviously one hospitality, but most places do have that problem in the industry. Um, I just feel like when it's done, it's not really rewarded or appreciated. And I feel like a lot of the things that uh the servers do, they are awarded with ships or like seniority, I would say, for just kind of doing bare minimum. It doesn't really apply. It's more of like a who you know, not a what you know kind of thing over there.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

Yeah, so yeah, that's that's the worst way you can run your business is by seniority. Like creating the server schedule by seniority is is the worst, most flawed way to run a business because you're gonna um encourage stalemate, encourage um lack of uh vision, lack of production, and that that what that those are things that kill culture and erode culture because why why does it matter how some how long someone's there, right? And someone will go, well, it's loyalty, right? They're being you know, they're loyal, so we're being loyal. There's no loyalty, right? When someone's working a job and you're paying them for that job, that's not a loyalty thing. That's them asking for a job to get paid to support themselves, and then the company's providing that job, they agree on the terms and the payment, all that stuff, and then they go and provide. So it's not a loyalty thing, they're not doing it for free, right? Right. So because someone's there longer doesn't mean that they should get a better shift a better schedule. Now, if they're a high performer, absolutely. Of course If they're a higher performer for a long time, right? Sure, I can reward that type of loyalty, but a lot of times what happens is I'm I'm a seniority, I get I get my way there, and then I start slipping, right? Standards start slipping, I can do whatever I want. What's the consequence, right? My schedule is still great no matter what. So that's one thing where restaurants have the luxury of being able to reward and discipline based off of like a scheduling. Like if you're working at a corporate job, the forensic thing, right? And the state pays you, gives you a raise, you know, you basically own that raise now. Like you know, they can't do anything about it. Your job performance kind of starts sinking, like they gave you the raise already. Right. But if you're in the restaurant industry, they can, you know, I'm gonna take your shifts back. I'll flip your shifts, I'm not gonna give you the best shifts, I'll give someone else the best shifts, whoever's performing best. So seniority is the worst way to do that. So I agree with that. What else?

SPEAKER_03 4:07

I would say it's out of management hands, but the way that people interpret hospitality over service. Because I feel like a lot of um, I've had coworkers in the past just they come in for the check, they collect it, and they go. And that's great for you. You know, at the end of the day, your bay bills are still paid, you have money to do what you want to do, but it kind of reflects on us as a whole. And I've had multiple tables like, why can't you be our server? I wish you were a server. And how do I keep that expectation of myself without getting discouraged when my peers aren't following it?

SPEAKER_00 4:38

And then what's the third, what's the third one? And this could be just an improvement on yourself, right? What do I what do you want to improve on as a as a server?

SPEAKER_03 4:46

Um, I actually had something happen to me last week. Really bad uh table. I mean, the the whole table was not terrible, it was just one person out of it, and my manager had seen how I like reacted on the back. I was like, they're just being really unreasonable. I just assumed that they she just didn't like me from the jump, and she offered to switch it, switch it to another server, you know, it's not your problem. I take things like that and I test myself. I'm like, no, don't do that because I'm gonna deal with a table like this again. Everyday life, I try to keep my temper down. You know, all of us have some problems, so I would say just keeping my cool when it comes to the not so nice customers, but it's a good challenge, and I feel like I can take that in everyday life.

SPEAKER_00 5:24

So absolutely. And then what about your employees, like coworkers? What's your biggest challenge with your co-workers?

SPEAKER_03 5:31

It's almost like it's a popularity contest. Like we're we're there to make friends, not money, and it's it's the opposite, it should not be that way at all. Oftentimes, when they're at work and it's a slow night, or there's no money to essentially be made, there's other things that we could be doing, and they're clicked up over at the well or at the expo, just kind of talking to one another or on the phones, and like again, when we do get a table, that's the first thing they see when they walk in, besides an empty restaurant, and they're probably their next thing is that's why it's empty, you know.

SPEAKER_00 5:59

100%. And then what about um management?

SPEAKER_03 6:03

Management does their part as far as operations go, but I feel like when it comes to being a leader, like leadership, I feel like you can have a job description and get hired and do that every day. Ultimately, when a fire starts or like it's crazy, you're in the weeds, that's when the management position turns into a leader role. You take initiative, you take charge. Management can tell us what to do, or have, you know, this is the way that it should go, the blueprint of a shift. However, when it comes down to having individual problems or like needing help, seeking help, sometimes all the management's not always there. I have certain managers I know I can go to, they'll have my back, you know, they'll fix a problem. Others not so much. It's just more so what I can do for them in that moment. And if I need help, it's interpreted as me being what's the word they always use? Entitled. Entitlement.

SPEAKER_00 6:59

We need help?

SPEAKER_03 7:00

So, yeah, yeah. So for example, I had one day there was something that was wrong in the system, and I had a specific manager, I was like, I don't think it should be listed as that, it should be listed as this. Yes, that's not something that we should go in the system and change right away. However, it needs to be done. No, it's not gonna be done. I'm like, you're telling me as ma as management, it's not gonna be done. I'm not asking it to be done right now, it's just a suggestion of what we can fix in the future. No, it's not gonna be done because I feel like you're questioning my authority by calling me out on something that wasn't done. Do they say that or are you assuming that? No, that's what they said.

SPEAKER_00 7:30

Interesting. Yeah, yeah. So management, not leadership. Right. Yeah. Okay. And then what's your uh end goal in life?

SPEAKER_02 7:42

To be happy.

SPEAKER_00 7:43

And how do you see that becoming coming to fruition?

SPEAKER_03 7:48

I always kind of look at life like if I have control over my destiny, I'm gonna do something great, whether it's making a lot of money or having a a family. But ultimately, I just wanna go by in life and not have to worry financially. I hope one day I can take it further than where I'm at when it comes in the industry, hopefully, like manager operations or something larger than what I am now as a waitress. Very passionate about it. And going back to what you were saying about hospitality, like that's an unconditional thing. I'm the oldest of seven kids. I moved at a very young age. Yeah. Moved out of a very young age. I currently have the three older ones with me. So I just feel like making sure that the people I love and myself are taken care of.

SPEAKER_00 8:30

Now you said something right now. You said that you hope to be a manager one day. Is that anyone understand that correctly?

SPEAKER_03 8:36

Someone higher up in the operations. Not I I could be a manager, but if I take it for a knot, that would be cool too. The owner, up in my own establishment.

SPEAKER_00 8:45

Okay. Do you want to be a manager?

SPEAKER_03 8:48

I could be. If the if the opportunity presented itself, I would take that.

SPEAKER_00 8:53

So you will you would be interested in it?

unknown 8:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 8:55

Okay. And when you say the opportunity present itself, what do you mean by that? Sorry to interrupt you, but I wanted to get this out really quickly because in this video, you're gonna hear a lot about training, systems, leadership, culture, consistency, brand value, guest retention. And it all sounds great, right? But how do we actually execute these things and how do we make them stick, right? How do we have a culture of accountability? How do we have hospitality delivered at a high level? Well, it all boils down to three things leadership, training, and systems. And I'm gonna show you how to build all three of those things. I've done it for over 350 restaurants worldwide, and I want to continue doing it, and I want to do it for free. So I'm gonna host a live event where it's absolutely free to join. You're gonna get a workbook, you're gonna get some bonuses, and we're gonna show you how to build leadership, training, and systems. So if you're interested in attending for free, the link is in the description.

SPEAKER_03 9:39

I feel like I work very hard now currently as a server, and something that I'm asked a lot. Oh, are you manager? The way that I hold myself, the way that I care about it, and knowing that I'm still kind of like fighting for shifts weekly and being told that by guests kind of doesn't discourage me, but I just feel like I'm kind of looked over.

SPEAKER_00 9:56

Or does what you're saying, it doesn't really discourage me, but discourage you from what?

SPEAKER_03 9:59

Discourages me from thinking that I can get to that spot, being that I'm being told by the guest who's the most important person in the entire operation that I could be bigger, but then I'm still fighting, battling it out for just a classic Friday night shift.

SPEAKER_00 10:12

Yeah, when you if you had to play devil's advocate, what would you say that some of your actions might be or performance issues might be that are stopping you from getting those Friday night shifts consistently?

SPEAKER_03 10:25

When things don't go over well at work, at times I feel like I lose my temper easily, not in front of guests, it's always at like meetings or pre-shifts. But I when I feel unheard, I take it very personal, just because I'm so passionate and I know that I have my job's best interest at heart, if that makes sense. So probably my my my mouths are the way that I handle certain situations.

SPEAKER_00 10:52

So when you say you lose your temper, and this is where you want to be really open, right? What what what like give me an example of that? Um give me an example of one where you can say honestly, like a uh looking back saying, I didn't I probably didn't handle that the best.

SPEAKER_03 11:06

Ultimately it's just advocating for myself when I feel like I'm not being listened to or I feel like you're not seeing my side of things.

SPEAKER_00 11:12

Right, but what does it look like when you do it? Like what is what are you what are you saying? What to give me an example?

SPEAKER_03 11:17

So, like if I'm at uh, for example, I've had like five management meetings regarding my shifts, each time it's a different excuse. Oh, uh one two years ago I took off a month. My grandfather passed away, I was taking care of him on hospice. I come back, I worked the two months, I'm still not getting my at least one weekend shift. What's up with it? And they tell me, oh, like it's because you had took or a particular manager told me that it was because I had taken time off. Well, I have two other co-workers that went on a month and a half long vacation to Greece, and like mine was kind of different, and I let you guys know, and I kept in contact, and I don't really feel like that is relevant to me asking for my shifts back three months later when they have all their shifts and then kind of like just bantering back and forth. But I save everything in my phone. So I always bring up like receipts, like you're saying this, but my work reflects this. And you're saying, for example, back to the seniority. You're saying seniority, but two servers that started after me have more shifts than me. And you're saying, Oh, it's about sales, and it's about Yelp. I'm the top-reviewed Yelp waitress or waitress on Yelp at a restaurant. So just kind of when they contradict themselves, I don't really appreciate it.

SPEAKER_00 12:18

And what but what do you say anything out of line?

SPEAKER_03 12:20

I don't cuss. I I hold myself very well. I try to be as professional as I can. I mean, an occasional eye roll or like some attitude, yeah. I'm I feel I feel like my job's being threatened.

SPEAKER_00 12:30

Give me an example of an occasional eye roll. Like, I mean, so like you're saying something to them, they're talking to you, and you just roll your eyes.

SPEAKER_01 12:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 12:39

Can you give me, can I see it? I want to see your eye roll, because I know you have a good one. I want to see how I want to see how deep it goes. That's not a bad one.

SPEAKER_03 12:50

I can control my mouth. It's my face that I worry about. Yeah. For sure. It's the facial expressions for sure.

SPEAKER_00 12:55

Is any sure that's your eye roll? Because that seems way subdued. I don't believe it. I think it's more difficult.

SPEAKER_03 13:00

You have to see it in action. I feel like it's kind of like a.

SPEAKER_00 13:01

Yeah, because that's very subdued. That's almost like playful.

SPEAKER_03 13:06

No, I sit there with a smile because at the end of the day, like I don't want my owner. Because at the end of the day, he calls the shots. What he says goes. So when me and management get into it, he definitely sees both sides of it. And I feel like Ownership, right? Yeah. Yeah. He does take, he does take what I say into consideration. If I have a problem, he'll address it within that week. You know, we'll sit down, we'll have a meeting about it. But I feel like when that does happen, my management team just kind of, excuse my language, just pull stuff out of their ass. And I have like receipts to back it up.

SPEAKER_00 13:33

Like, it's because then it becomes a game of telephone.

SPEAKER_03 13:36

Oh, 100%.

SPEAKER_00 13:36

Yeah, because you he goes to them and they're like, no, no, no, she's doing this. And you go back, like, I didn't do that, and it's back and forth. Okay. And then um, with that being said, why why would you want to get into leadership and then why would you want to get into ownership?

SPEAKER_03 13:51

As far as leadership goes, I feel like ever since a very young age, like if you have the qualities, you have them. If you don't, they could develop over time. But I feel like as I'm getting older, I definitely take responsibility for things that don't necessarily fall under my job description. And I like I said, I'm passionate about it. So when it comes to management, I feel like I would have the voice and have the authority to make changes where I see fit. And then as far as ownership goes, that just kind of expands off of that. If you're a great, you know, leader, the opportunities are endless.

SPEAKER_00 14:26

So what why would you want to be a leader? Like what would be what would be the th the number one reason that you want to be a leader?

SPEAKER_03 14:34

Because I have good intentions when it comes to my industry, and with those good intentions in the proper position, I can make changes where I see fit. Like as a server, right? Yeah, as a server, I don't really have any authority. I mean, I can talk until I'm blue in the facing what I you know think needs to be changed, but I'm just another minimum wage employee.

SPEAKER_00 14:58

Now you were uh you saw my presentation, and how much do you believe in leveraging your time?

SPEAKER_03 15:06

A lot. Like time is money.

SPEAKER_00 15:09

It is.

SPEAKER_03 15:10

So for example, with going off that, it's like a couple months ago, very, very slow Tuesday. I came in mid shift. There had already been an AM server, we're both in until like six or seven. I have her and one of my managers sitting at the bar because there's nothing else to do. Sitting on their phone on Amazon orders, whatever. I take that time unasked to go in the back, detail everything, because at the end of the day, it's a slow Tuesday. Health department comes in tomorrow, we're still gonna get a good store score, but it could be better. I label all the stuff, do all the all the all the bells and whistles in the back, send it to the group chat. I get two responses. One being the manager that I have a good connection with likes it, one being one of the investors. None of my employees or peers, hey Kaylin, good job. Or I had like said, like, we have a lot of this stuff, we don't need double stocks. I combine two things of milk in the fridge, two things of orange juice, we're wasting product, and nobody acknowledged that, and it wasn't made to be acknowledged by anybody in an authority position either. So I feel like time management, that's what I do with my time compared to my peers that are just on their phone during a slow day.

SPEAKER_00 16:11

But you said no one no one acknowledged it. That upsets you.

SPEAKER_03 16:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:16

Okay, why?

SPEAKER_03 16:17

Because I feel like it's I'm not getting validation where it's due. And it's not like I want to get told, Oh, yeah, you did your job great today, but nobody else does stuff like that unless they're being asked. It's not the first, not the last time I'm gonna do it either, even though I'm not getting validated for it. That's just how I work.

SPEAKER_00 16:35

Okay. So I'm gonna go over a couple things. We'll start just kind of nailing things. What I want to do is I want to go over some of the things you talked about, right? Um, and I want to go over some things that I think will make you successful in your current role, and then I want to go over some things I think will make you successful in your future roles and how to start mapping out your future roles. Because to be honest with you, like straight up, I feel like you're kind of a little bit aimless right now, right? You're like serving and I'm serving and I'm busy and I'm serving, and I'm just trying to kind of do this thing with them serving and just kind of get by. I fell into that trap, I've seen a million people fall into that trap, and all of a sudden it's like, I'm 25, I'm 28, I'm not, I'm not happy, right? I'm I'm irritated, I'm pissed off, I don't like my man, or whatever, right? And then you become basically a future version of these people that you're probably seeing there right now. Like I saw them there when I was, you know, people I'm like, dude, you're you're not a happy person, right? And you're not going anywhere.

SPEAKER_01 17:29

Right.

SPEAKER_00 17:30

You have the capability of going places, right? But it's like you said, time is money, right? We want to we want to be really, really, really clever with our time. Um, and you're 22, right? Yeah. So we want to leverage that, like leverage the hell out of that. Because right now, if you were like me, you would just waste your 20s, right? Which is what I did. And I was really good at it.

SPEAKER_03 17:51

Um it's easy to do, it's really easy to do. It's easy to do. I'm only two years in and I feel like I'm already halfway there.

SPEAKER_00 17:56

Yeah, exactly. We don't want to do that, right? Right? I want you to be when you're 30, be where most people are when they're 45, right? So I'm gonna show you some things. So, first of all, you were like uh one thing you said, if I can wave a magic wand, I'd like standards to be uh standards all around, right? I like that's something I'd really like, you know, and that's something you should want. Now, there's two things to look at, okay? You're saying I want standards to be the same all around. I want to make sure motivations are right, okay? Because what we want to do, like I talked about earlier, is you want to learn the art of removing your ego and your pride from your decisions, right? And from your day-to-day operations. Okay, think about your ego and pride as attached to your everything you do, right? It's good, they're like attached like this, and you as a human have to work every day when you wake up in the morning to pull these things apart. And even during the day, they're gonna come back here, right? And all of a sudden you're making decisions, getting angry, all that stuff. So you gotta pull them away because your pride, like a lot of people, oh, you need a little bit of pride. No, you need a little bit of confidence. Confidence is one thing pride is not, pride is before the fall, right? You do a really good job one day, take some pride in it, right? That's it. But saying, I did a good job yesterday and I'm prideful for that, that's where you start losing. So we want to pull that pride away, right? And earn that pride every single day to come back. And then your ego, your ego is designed as a caveman. So basically, your ego is designed so that when back in the day when you were a caveman, you wouldn't share your food. Because what happens if you shared your food?

SPEAKER_03 19:22

You don't have any left for yourself.

SPEAKER_00 19:23

You don't have left for yourself and you'll starve. So your ego is designed, your brain designed, the evolution designed ego to make sure that it's my food, me, my food, me. We're not cavemen anymore, right? So our ego serves no purpose except to hurt us, right? And so a lot of your decision making, I can tell, is that a love? Ego, right? Ego driven. And that's okay, because you're human, right? Correct?

SPEAKER_01 19:47

Right.

SPEAKER_00 19:47

Okay. You're human, right? So you're gonna have your ego attached to it. This is the art, this is this is your superpower that you're gonna develop as you go from 22 to 23 to 24, which most people in their whole entire lives will never develop, which is I'm removing my ego from my decision making, from my uh well, the way I see people, the way I see the world is the way I see things, right? So we're gonna try and focus on that. So standards all around, that's the reason I'm bringing that up, is because standards all around, it's like, okay, I want standards all around, right? I would love that. That if I can wave a magic wand, I want everyone to have standards. But do I want that everyone to have standards because I feel it's unfair that I'm living up to standards and they're not, right? Because I'm living up to standards, but the person who gets a seniority and the better schedule is not living up to their standards, or do I want the standards to live around me because I want to work around a bunch of A players? Right. Those are two different decisions, okay? If you're saying, and you have to be honest with yourself in these situations, right? Because everyone's gonna say, oh yeah, B, right? But if it is A, in any way, shape, or form, where you're like, I think it's unfair and they should have to do it, that's where you lose. Right. You're motivated by the wrong reasons, you're looking at things the wrong way, okay? And so you gotta remove that. Even if it's both, you have to remove this piece of it out of your mind, right? I want standards because I want to work with eight players. That's what I want. I want to work in an environment where I'm working with other eight players, where I'm being challenged by eight players, where there's eight players above me and there's eight players below me, and I'm working with eight players because that's the environment I want to be in. And I went, that's what I would do. I'd always seek that. If I went to a restaurant and it was all of a sudden it's like C players, I'm out. I'm gonna go apply another job and find one, and hopefully they have eight players. And they don't, I'm gonna go to the next spot, right? And so that's what we want is to make sure that your decision making is right, right? We want to be around eight players to make ourselves better, and then also to make the people around us better, right? So that's so when you say standards all around, you can you you first of all, what I would do for you in your situation now is keep doing what you're doing and just live it. Be the example, live the example. Here's what a playing, here's what a player looks like. I'm gonna pick up your slack, okay? And I'm gonna pick up your slack, and that's okay because I want to become an A player. I have plans beyond this place, right? And so I don't care if I'm picking up your Slack. And tell me if you think this and be honest, okay, because it's really important to be honest in this, okay? If if someone's if someone's commenting. You're constantly picking up their Slack, right? Because they're just the OPC player and they're not performing, and you're picking up their Slack. And every day you're coming in, you're like, I want to keep the standard, so I'm gonna pick up their Slack. Do you feel like this person's taking advantage of you?

SPEAKER_03 22:12

No.

SPEAKER_00 22:13

Why?

SPEAKER_03 22:13

I don't even think half the time that they notice that I'm doing these things.

SPEAKER_00 22:17

Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 22:18

So I've had like one table. I actually had the guests prior on their first experience. So I immediately, hey guys, thank you so much for coming back. I'm actually out here in the section too. I'm not your guys' server, but let me know if I can get you guys anything. The whole experience was bad. Their drinks never came out. It took too long. I went to the well, I got the drinks. I let the server know. I'm like, hey, that table's really unhappy. Their food was cooked too long. The appetizer came out at the same time because they didn't separate the tickets when they sent. And the whole time the guy's just like, okay. Okay. I don't know. Like, do you even know how your drinks touched the table? Do you even know how the steak got sent back to the kitchen? You didn't do any of that. Do you know who did that? I'm not gonna tell him that, but he's he doesn't didn't care. Didn't care about the guest, didn't care anything. Oh, okay, it's a two-top. Not not enough money for me. And I took it to management. I took it to management.

SPEAKER_00 23:02

And what did the management say?

SPEAKER_03 23:04

Okay, Caitlin, thank you. Thank you for thank you for helping me.

SPEAKER_00 23:07

Okay, yeah, exactly. Um, okay, so yeah, so that's good, right? I mean, we're just doing it for the guest, we're not doing it for him, and we're not expecting anything from him, and we're not even getting upset about him. We're not even getting upset about management. Because here's the thing the good news is as at this point, you know exactly what it is across the board. You know what to expect, you know what the situation is, you know what your coworkers are capable of, you know what your leadership's capable capable of. So we just gotta make sure that like we're not letting that stuff get to us, right? It is what it is. We can't change it.

SPEAKER_03 23:35

They came back and requested me like two weeks after, so yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_00 23:38

Yeah, so you can't change it. You you you you you can't change them, but what you can do is always have the embeddement of the company that you're working for. That's your that's your mission, your goal. Because you said you do believe in ownership, right? So you can always say, hey, I'm here to make sure that the guests are having the best experience possible. I don't want to prove any points. So what I'm trying to do, I'm just trying to make sure the guests have the best experience possible because I think you know now, you're starting to realize it, you cannot change the way people think or act, right? Not with words. You can't change your leadership, you can't change them. You're not gonna be able to change them. What else isn't gonna change them is you getting upset. Right. You getting bothered, you getting it.

SPEAKER_03 24:12

The only thing I have control over in that entire situation is my reaction.

SPEAKER_00 24:16

Exactly. Yeah, 100%. So I'm not gonna get upset. Now it's really important. I talked about this during the meeting, right? There's a difference between saying, I'm not upset, right? And there's a difference between accepting and forgiving, like fully, right? Right? This this other server, not my favorite person, don't necessarily mean think they're a good human being, right? Hope all for the best for you, and let me know what I can do to support you and be of service to you. I got you. I got your back. While I'm here, I got your back, and I want to be as much of service to you as possible, right? Because again, we're not that's not someone taking advantage of you, that's not you being weak, that's you actually being very strong. Okay, because it's a lot easier to say, right, screw that person, versus me saying, I wish the best for you and I want to be of service to you, right? How can I support you? What do you think about that?

SPEAKER_03 25:06

I think I actually try to abide by that for the sake of my own peace. You know, I never wish bad on anybody, even the management that I don't get along with. I don't wish bad. Whether I'm the one that leaves the company, they probably won't be. It ended up, it will be me eventually, ultimately, when I go to something greater, I still wish the best. Even with all the little side comments or scheduling conflicts, I still wish the best. I come in, I say hello, how are you doing? I try to talk about not too personal, but like little personal talks that's not fake, you know. I try to, but that's again, I it's kind of the ego. It's for me. Just because I know ultimately I'm holding up my end. So anything that's negative is completely one-sided.

SPEAKER_00 25:44

100%. That's what it needs to be, one-sided. And that's but you have to really be honest with yourself and saying, am I honestly releasing this? Am I honestly forgiving this? Am I honestly saying that, or am I saying it? Yeah. Right? Just to say it. I know, or am I actually living it, breathing it? Like, I do forgive you. Right. It's fine. I don't, you know, I don't take it personally. This because you have to understand one important thing, okay? What this stuff might feel important right now, and it's not. Nothing you're doing right now is important. You're gonna look back in this even five years from now and be like, didn't matter. None of that mattered, right? The shifts I got, the anything, the money I made, the acknowledgement, whatever it was, none of it mattered. It didn't. Building myself in that situation mattered, yes. What I did mattered, but you're talking about the schedule, you're talking about the money, that stuff doesn't matter. Right, right? It just doesn't freaking matter. You work all Monday through Thursday shifts for the rest of the time that you're there is not gonna have an impact on your life whatsoever, five and ten years from now. The way you carry yourself through that is going to matter. Do you see the difference? Yeah. So just remember that, right? Like this does just this stuff doesn't freaking matter. Um keeping your standard when no one else does. So that was a real that's a really good point to bring up. Can you explain that to me a little more? Because you said I have a I'm I'm I'm kind of struggling a little bit with keeping my standard when no one else is keeping their standard.

SPEAKER_03 26:59

So I hold myself to a high standard every single day. And ultimately, like going back to that in the back of my head, and maybe to maybe if I act this way, I'll get a better shift. But that's just kind of that's me as a person as a whole. I really go home and oh, I forgot that ranch at table 34. Are you kidding me? And it really does affect me, you know? So when I'm doing all these things during my, you know, shift, helping out my coworkers, and I kind of see them like you had talked about not returning that to me. It's more sort of like not caring about their tables. It's like I can only do so much in the hours that I'm there and I have my section covered. Whatever else I can do in that time after my section's taken care of, 110%, I'm gonna be there and I'm gonna do it. But when I see the lack of, I guess, leadership too, not applying those standards or when I'm not doing something, it's immediately to the nail. And then I get back to it, and then I see the next person not doing that, and it's almost like they're right in their faces doing it, and it's it's not a big deal. So, not that it discourages me to hold the standard, it's just more frustrating acknowledging them because like you had said during our presentation, like I'll never lower myself. Oh, they're not doing it, I'm not gonna do it because that's not how I work, that's not my work ethic. You know, it's not on me, it's in me. Like, and I've done this for a while, and I know how to make decent money and I know how to give the guests the best experience possible. But seeing other people not care about that is just it kind of like it ruins the job for me. Like, it's like, okay, if this is what the restaurant is and this is what it's it's made on, it's it's killing the culture. What am I doing here? You know, what am I doing here? I care so passionately, and like like going back to it, I'm proud of my yoke. My name is very hard to spell, and I have over a hundred names with a proper spelling. So it's I I take pride in it and I try to help them out. They even say, like, oh, what do you do? Give them free dessert. No. And like we're next to Disneyland, the pretty face can only get me so pafar when you're having a bunch of families in or tables of all women, you know, and I do hold a standard for myself, and other people just kind of like mock it.

SPEAKER_00 28:54

Other employees?

SPEAKER_03 28:55

Yeah, the other employees just kind of like mock mock that behavior. Oh, you think you're so good, or like, oh, your Yelp reviews are this, and it's like if you guys would just stop worried about the popularity of it all and you know, apply yourself to the job, you too could be like that.

SPEAKER_00 29:08

Yeah, but do you feel like you react to that?

SPEAKER_03 29:11

No, I I brush it off. Take it with a grain of salt. Take it with a grain of salt.

SPEAKER_00 29:15

You brush it off?

SPEAKER_03 29:16

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 29:16

With a grain of salt?

SPEAKER_03 29:18

I do.

SPEAKER_00 29:18

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 29:19

In the moment, in the moment, I'll definitely laugh. Even if I do take it home with me, I would never let that be shown, you know.

SPEAKER_00 29:25

Okay. Well, it's not about letting it be shown. I mean, that is important, but also it's just about not letting it get to you, right? And it's gonna get to you at the moment or whatever, but it's like you have to really take a step back for a second, right? And you have to say, it's like the Quiet Aaron, right? Right? Quiet Aaron became wildly successful, and everyone made fun of him at work. Everyone, I remember they're like, Oh, he's a he doesn't have a life. That's what it would say. He does all that extra work because he doesn't have a life. I have a life, which I'd go out and drink, right? Spend four hours drinking after work. I have a life though, that's my life. But Aaron doesn't have a life, that's why he works so hard, that's why he does so well because he doesn't have a life, and they would always make fun of him, say this, say that about him. But these are all people that were never gonna be successful in the first place. So it's like, who cares what they say? It's just such a weird thing for someone to try and criticize someone, bring someone down for being successful.

SPEAKER_01 30:09

Right.

SPEAKER_00 30:09

What's important to understand about that is the villa is like I said, when you go into work every day, you develop habits, right? And so this is why it gets really important to understand am I letting this stuff go and am I processing this stuff properly, like when someone gives you a hard time or not? Because this is pretty much how it's gonna be wherever you go. Just a heads up. Yeah, right? It's always gonna be like this, one way or another. Um, I had a dishwasher one time who gave me one of the best life lessons I ever had. He didn't have a car. So whenever I would bar uh bartend, I was we'd close a place up together, I would give him a ride home. And he had like really broken English, and he was just the nicest guy, always in a good mood, always positive. And so one day I'm driving him home and I'm like, how's it going? And there's another dishwasher named Raul. And Raul was like a cokehead, temperamental, crazy guy, weird kind of guy. And so, you know, Fernando's telling me about Raul, just saying, Raul is, you know, doing all this stuff to me, and he was making my job hard, and he was doing this, and he was doing that, and he was going, blah, blah, blah. And I said, You know, Fernando, you need to get another job. And he's like, What do you mean? I'm like, you need to go get another job. I go, you are the hardest working, most dedicated, consistent dishwasher I've ever met in my life. It's so hard to find a good dishwasher.

SPEAKER_03 31:24

100%. And you'll have them for two weeks and they're gone.

SPEAKER_00 31:26

Yeah, exactly. So you, as a dishwasher and your performance, people will hire you like that. And they'll appreciate you. And then you'll have to deal with a role. So why don't you go find another job? And he goes, Preston, my friend, you have to understand something. No matter where I go, there will always be a role. So I just need to learn how to deal with this role. And I was like, Oh my god. That's so true. Right? I'm like telling him, like, run from your problem. Run from it. Yeah, go run from it. Like, they're just run from it. He's like, No, no, no, I embrace it, I deal with it. So that's why it's important when these moments, right? Because you're just naming out things, but there's other things that happen that you don't remember, right? There's other things that happen that are gonna happen that are gonna be like side, you know, uh uh off the cuff, right? That you're not expecting, but you have to remember that. Like, what am I doing? I'm being as successful as humanly possible, I'm holding my standard. If someone's gonna come in and criticize for that for me, if someone's gonna come in and make excuses for my success, right? Oh, you're buying them desserts, oh, is it because of the way you look? Like that it's it's a huge, like enormous compliment for someone to come in and say that you're cheating when you're not, right? You're doing so well that you're cheating. And that's how we take it. It's a compliment. I'm not, but thank you very much, right? And and you think you're like so good? I I I take pride in the hard work that I put into it to to make this place better. I do, yes, I do, I do. And then I'm sorry that you don't, right? Or you don't see why that's beneficial.

SPEAKER_03 32:53

How would you say I would handle that when management interprets all those things that you just said as entitlement?

SPEAKER_00 32:59

What do you mean?

SPEAKER_03 33:00

So me holding myself to that standard and knowing that I'm good because I know my work ethic, I know how passionate I am about that. Nobody could really know that for a fact except for myself, because that's me, that's how I feel. And when I bring these like certain um things up when it comes to sections. Hey, why does that server have a party of 40 under their wing and I only have a three-top? Oh, well, that's their section. That's awesome. But you really think one server should have 40 people under their wing while I have a three-top? You're so entitled. Okay, well, I'm taking this to my owner because I think he's not here and he definitely wouldn't make the same decision if he was here. So are you sure? Or do you guys not want to make a change about that? Because you have the authority to, and I'm not gonna argue, I'm still gonna go give that three-top the best experience that they've ever had at a restaurant. In my head, I'm gonna be a little disappointed just because how are we really running this facility if that's our leader and that's what they're choosing to do, and that's taken as entitlement. Oh, you're gonna go run and tell our owner. Yeah, that means I'm ten toes down, and I I I believe in 100% what I'm standing on.

SPEAKER_00 34:00

So I would tell you this, and I kind of go back to what I said earlier, which is this stuff doesn't matter, right? You're trying you're fighting battles that don't matter. And so there there was a uh one of my mentors said this to me one time, and it's it really was very impactful, where he and in it's like something you've heard before, but it's something people don't actually think about. But it's like pick and choose your battles. Like, pick and choose your life's gonna be about battling and fighting all the time, especially when you're trying to be successful. That's what it's always gonna be. So pick and choose your battles because every time you battle, it takes bandwidth from you, takes bandwidth away from you, right? Takes bandwidth away from other things that you can be successful in in life and be putting that bandwidth towards that, right? But when you're battling stuff, make sure you're picking and choosing. So, my my my thing to you is don't fight battles that don't don't have a win. Okay. I'm gonna go up to that manager and I'm gonna be like, why does he have a 40 top and I only have the three top? What's a manager gonna do? You already know the answer, nothing. You know he's not gonna change, or they're not gonna change, you know they're not gonna give you the 40 top next time. You know, if you go to the owner, there's a really good chance nothing's gonna change. So now you're picking battles to fight that aren't winnable, right? Right? You have to think about that. So instead of that, own your role and understand what you're doing, right? You're you're fighting for things that have no victory. Now, I'm not saying you shouldn't fight for things, right? Or fight for, but but you're fighting failed battles that have A, no way of winning, and B, truly no impact on your future success. Right, right? It's like you're taking that 40 top isn't gonna be like, you know, I became a millionaire because, all right, I gotta give it to my manager. She gave me this 40 top 10 years ago, and after that, it was just like I bought my first house, you know, and that was my first investment property. It's never gonna be that, right? It's it's it these things don't matter. I'm telling you right now, it doesn't matter that you took that three top and made$60 that night, that person makes$600 that night. That this will not matter. You're gonna look back and go, I can't believe I just wasted time on that. Even a freaking ounce of energy on that. They're$600, they're gonna do nothing with it, right? That's$60, you're gonna do what you can with it. Just is what it is. When you're making$400,000,$500,000 a year, you're gonna be laughing at your old self saying, I was sitting there freaking, getting myself all worked up, fighting stupid battles for$500. Right, right? So we gotta think bigger.

SPEAKER_01 36:18

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

SPEAKER_00 36:20

Bigger picture. Don't waste your time. Go in there, own it. That's fine. They're gonna give me a three-top anyway. Why am I fighting to get it when I know I'm not gonna get it? I deserve it, yes. But that doesn't mean you have to fight for it. So just know what you're fighting for and know what the situation is, right? You are obviously gonna create an exit plan, but I think right now your goal is to get out of your comfort zone, because I think that's the only reason why you're still there, and and find somewhere else that's gonna let you flourish in your role, right? And flourish in two ways: one financially and two mentally, right? Because, dude, how are you supposed to get better as a server if you're the best server in the restaurant?

SPEAKER_02 36:59

Very true. I have nobody to learn from.

SPEAKER_00 37:01

You have zero people to learn from, zero people to encourage you, zero people to push you. You need somebody that's gonna challenge you, right? You need to be challenged, you need to be on your A game. Problem is you can walk in on your C game right now and you're still the best server. That's a problem.

SPEAKER_01 37:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:14

And I've been there.

SPEAKER_01 37:14

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:15

Uh so keeping my cool when I when when things get hard or keeping my cool with uh hard guests, like difficult guests?

SPEAKER_03 37:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 37:22

You have that problem?

SPEAKER_03 37:24

Um, I did. I feel like in my early years of serving, who doesn't, you know, and that's probably the major problem in serving is like if you can handle that, you can handle it. If you can't handle that that customer interaction, having to bite your tongue and the customer is always right, not for you. Get out of the get out of the industry as a as a whole. I see actually improvement with myself going back to that same table that my manager offered to switch. Hey, like she I see how she's being to you. You don't want her. Yeah, I do. I do. This is for me. This is for me, and I'm gonna see how much I can take right now.

SPEAKER_00 37:53

100%.

SPEAKER_03 37:54

And that whole time I still got 22% at the end of the check, and she was the one who paid and signed the bill.

SPEAKER_00 37:58

Of course, because the problem is that we try to read people and think we can read people when we can't.

SPEAKER_01 38:04

No.

SPEAKER_00 38:04

Okay, you don't know how you don't you don't know what they're thinking, you don't know what they're saying, you're just trying to judge them off the reaction. And so you're trying to, and that's your interpretation of one human being, and it's gonna be wrong.

SPEAKER_01 38:15

Right.

SPEAKER_00 38:15

And so they could have a bad day, whatever. They can just be tired, whatever.

SPEAKER_02 38:20

Guilty, I do it all the time.

SPEAKER_00 38:21

100%.

SPEAKER_02 38:22

So do I, right?

SPEAKER_00 38:23

It's not because I don't like that person, it's because I'm just in a bad mood. Yeah, exactly. So we want, we want to be uh we want again. This is what we're gonna do is superpower. That's you removing your ego and your pride, right? You you were challenging yourself in that moment, but at the same time, it's like, let's practice moving our ego and our pride and making sure we're not reacting to it in any way, shape, or form. And that's really what is it becomes a superpower, right? Because it's like, I'm not here to make sure they again, it's unconditional hospitality, it's unconditional. You don't have to act a certain way. I'm just here to give you the best experience possible. You want to be rude or short, whatever, make maybe a comment, that's fine. Obviously, if anybody's inappropriate or advancing on you, unacceptable, right? Someone's cussing at you, unacceptable. But outside of that, people are people, I'm gonna give you the best experience possible, right? It's unconditional. Doesn't matter what tip you give me. Um, and then underperforming coworkers. I think we kind of covered that, right? All of if you're an A player, most of your co-workers are gonna be underperforming, right? We cannot let that dictate our mood. We cannot let that dictate our our our mental health. Like we have to be able to just move past that. I'm gonna perform better than you, you're gonna give me a hard time, you're gonna think you're performing better than me. You're gonna talk and act like you're performing better than me. You're gonna try and criticize my performance to say that for some whatever reason, the only reason I'm doing better than you for whatever reason is because I have some sort of advantage, right? Called a victim mentality. They're gonna have it, they can own it, that's fine. But guess what? I'm just gonna be the best version of myself, and I'm not gonna be upset. I wish the best for you and let me know if I can do anything to help you. I got your back. Right? Do you agree with that?

SPEAKER_03 39:54

Yeah, I do. And taking that in every aspect of life, rather than just just at work. Because it's it's that apply with friends, it applies to all.

SPEAKER_00 40:01

Everything. Yeah, it's gonna apply to people that you date, it's gonna apply to future jobs, it's gonna apply to everything. It's gonna apply to family. You're gonna have family if you become successful, you're gonna have family that's gonna be not happy about it. And they're gonna like try and chip chip at you about it, right? And that's okay. They're human, right? That the the what the psychology we can't understand. Um, management, not leadership. So managers are babysitters, they're glorified babysitters. Leaders are someone who makes the company better.

SPEAKER_01 40:28

Right.

SPEAKER_00 40:29

A leader is never going to ever, ever, ever give someone a party of 40 and someone else a party of three. I don't even care about favoritism, whatever.

SPEAKER_01 40:41

Right.

SPEAKER_00 40:41

Who would give someone in that restaurant where you have um you have you have entrees that are$76? 40 people. Like that is not leadership. Clearly. So don't worry about it, right? You're working with managers, not leaders. It is what it is. Just again, you know what it is, right? Focus on developing yourself, focus on your habits, focus on being the best part of yourself. I don't think you need to focus too much more on the serving aspect of it. I think what you need to focus more on is your mentality and reaction to things.

SPEAKER_02 41:17

I think so too.

SPEAKER_00 41:18

Understanding what it is, accepting it, growing from it, right? And saying, okay, this is this is the this is the here's where I can grow. And again, like you said, I'm gonna take this into my future, I'm gonna take this into my personal life too. Because if you do this stuff with uh like people you date, friends, all that stuff. It's literally a blueprint. It's a blueprint, and it makes you so much more powerful when you're able to do that thing instead of getting worked up and reacting all the time, which is what 90% of the people do. I fall into it sometimes. I'm like, I fall into that trap. I'm like, oh my god, I just literally just jumped into reaction, now I feel stupid. Right? And you're gonna take a lot of pride when you can walk away with your head up, right? And your mouth closed. Because that's hard to do, right?

SPEAKER_03 42:02

Definitely really hard.

SPEAKER_00 42:03

Very hard work, very hard to do it. And that's why it's important again for you because you're the the because you can't you can't hide it, is that whole thing where it's like not faking it, I'm not okay, it's fine, I'm not gonna say anything. It's no, I'm I forgive.

SPEAKER_01 42:14

Right.

SPEAKER_00 42:15

We're good. I got you. Whatever you need. Um now you want to become a manager. Okay, I want to tell you about that for a second. So you want to become a manager. I think you should do whatever you want in life, right? Whatever makes you happy. Um, if you want to become a manager, there's a very big success metric that that comes along with that. If you look at someone like uh like a restaurant like the one you're in right now, it's gonna seem not too exciting, right? Not very glamorous. But what you want to do is go somewhere, take a pay cut, and learn how to become a manager. Learn the skill set. Have you read Unreasonable Hospitality?

SPEAKER_01 42:50

I have not.

SPEAKER_00 42:51

Okay, you should read that. But Unreasonable Hospitality, Will Gadera starts off as a manager and and he wanted to learn the insides and out of business. So he was at it, he was a became a manager at this like kind of cool restaurant, right? And then he realized he didn't know anything about the business of restaurants. He just knew how to manage front house, right? Like I can just walk around the, you know, I knew the basics. He's like, I gotta learn the back. So he got a job as a crappy little restaurant, being a manager in the back, like doing all the numbers. Crappy little restaurant, just doing all the numbers, right? Then he got a job as a manager here, manager there, and he started developing his skill set as a manager, growing as a manager, and he went from restaurant to restaurant. His whole goal was I'm just gonna work my ass off and make this restaurant better. That's my whole goal. That's it. That's all I do. That's the only thing I think about. And so that's all he did. He ends up working at 11 Madison Square, which is a fine dining restaurant owned by Danny Meyer, one of the biggest restaurant tours in the world. And then he he made he ended up making that restaurant, 11 Madison Square, one of the most successful restaurants physic uh financially and critically. And so he wrote a book on reasonable hospitality, sold millions and millions and millions of copies. He's now a millionaire, right? And he just travels, does tours, does uh speeches, sells books.

SPEAKER_03 43:58

And all that's from the That he gained at that small restaurant.

SPEAKER_00 44:01

Exactly. And that's it. That's why I talk about leveraging your time, right? He's not looking back going, I should have asked for more money when I was at that restaurant. I should have got paid more. Why didn't I get paid more when I was at that restaurant? Why'd they let that one manager take my good shifts? Why'd they let that one manager do that one thing? Why didn't my GM, he doesn't do you think he gives a crap about anything? No. His journey was his journey, right? I'm here for myself, I'm here to learn, here to grow, and that's it.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

Right.

SPEAKER_00 44:26

Okay, and then I'm here to do what's best for the business always. And if other, you know, if all these other things happen, which I promise you they did, right? He he will he'll learn. And so he has one chapter in the book I think he'll really like where he started working for his first corporate restaurant. And they had this, they had this like um vase that would sit on the bar, but it would block when he walked in, it would block the bar, right? What you saw on the bar. And so he would move the vase on the other side of the bar. He's like, oh, problem solved. Why was that vase there? Like, who whose idea was it to put the vase there? Well, it was corporate's idea. So corporate comes in one day, the regional manager comes in, and he looks at the vase and he looks at Will and he goes, Why is the vase over there? And he's like, Oh, because when you walk in, the vase sits there and it blocks like the bartender and all that, it just blocks all the action. And he goes, That's not where we put the vase. And the regional manager grabs the vase and puts it back and he goes, That's where the vase goes. And Will is like, dude, you're not here. You just walk in and just move this vase and tell me what's up. Like you just think you know everything, and you're not even here. And so the whole chapter is about the regional manager sitting him down and saying, We have 18 locations, right? And we have to have consistency in these locations. That's what's making a restaurant successful. I showed him all the numbers, all the statistics, all the stuff. And he's like, one of our success metrics and consistency and how we keep things consistent is that every single thing has a place in the restaurant. Always. So for example, the corner of the bar, right? At the corner of the bar, this vase always goes in the corner of the bar. When people walk into a restaurant, they're gonna see that vase at every corner of every bar that we have. Now, some of the restaurants that we have design-wise, this vase isn't in the perfect spot. But it's really important for consistency that this vase stays here in every spot, whether it's the best spot for it or not, because consistency trumps that location of the vase. Does that make sense, Will? And Will's like, I got it, right? And that's kind of what I want you to think, start thinking about, okay? Because I think that's where you're need you need to open up your mind a little bit, where it's like, I think you don't don't know best, right? Don't ever know best, don't always know best. Just try and understand and learn as you grow. And that's what I want you to do. So as a manager, you can you can move up, go take a pay cut, go start being a manager, go start learning as much as you can, take on as much responsible responsibility. Do you remember that quote I told you about Napoleon Hill?

SPEAKER_02 46:48

Can you can you retell me? It was a good quote. I thought you had a lot of people. I'm like, I ordered the book and I ordered this the same day.

SPEAKER_00 46:53

Oh, good job. Okay, the man who does more than what he's paid for will soon be paid for more than what he does. There it is. Yeah, so that's so important. The man who does like go in, which is what you do, I can tell. Like that's sort of your philosophy, right? But because again, like that's why I want you to get tips out of your head, I want you to get tables out of your head, I want you to fight for the wrong things out of your head. It's the man who does more than what he's paid for will soon be paid for more than what he does. So go out there, get that managing job, hustle, learn more. Tell him, give me more responsibility, give me more responsibility, give me more. I want to learn more, don't need to pay me more, and just start leveraging your time and growing. Now, because the crazy thing is, like I told you, the QQS, right? Quantity, quality, um, spirit, when you start maximizing that out as like a GM, you're gonna be making money.

SPEAKER_01 47:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 47:37

Director of operations, you're gonna be making money. You want to open your own location, sure. But if you want to stay in management, go director of operations, you're talking about making change at one restaurant, how about making changes in 40?

SPEAKER_01 47:48

Right, right?

SPEAKER_00 47:48

Being the one that just makes a decision for all 40. Right? That's a director of operations, and they're making uh, I mean, you're talking about 300,000 plus plus benefits, galore, all that stuff. If you work at country clubs, we like work with a country club in Florida, they're freaking um, their their uh assistant general manager makes$350,000 a year. They close at 9 p.m. Six out of 12 or sorry, eight out of twelve months, they're slow because uh it's a club, it's a private club, and everyone goes on vacation. It is it's it's still a difficult job, but it's a lot different than restaurants. It's and it's very chill, and you're dealing with a lot of affluential people and you're making some serious money. So there's a lot out there, right? Right? So there's a lot to do, but probably get knowledge under your belt first. You gotta get out of your comfort zone. Yeah. Out of your freaking comfort zone. Stop being a server.

SPEAKER_02 48:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 48:38

Seriously.

SPEAKER_02 48:39

I know.

SPEAKER_00 48:39

Get out of there.

SPEAKER_02 48:40

It's the leap. I have to bet on myself.

SPEAKER_00 48:42

You have to bet on yourself a hundred percent. What are you what is the what money is serving bringing to you right now that's gonna like benefit you in the future?

SPEAKER_02 48:51

Not life-changing money.

SPEAKER_00 48:52

No, nothing. It's just it's supporting your lifestyle now, and you like that and you're comfortable with it, right?

SPEAKER_01 48:57

Right.

SPEAKER_00 48:57

Get out of that comfort zone. Be in fear, get scared, be dangerous, right? That's that's those are the bets you want to take, especially while you're young. Because now it's like a little bit easier than when you're like 30 and you have a bunch of bills, right? Or you have a family, you know. Right now you can take some really big risks. Right. And then another thing too is like, you know, I want you to start really having this, this, this mindset of being successful, right? And I know you have that mindset, but I really want you to go further with it. And one thing I don't want to hear you saying again, in my opinion, this is just unsolicited advice, is saying stuff like, I'm just another minimum wage employee. Right? I'm just another employee. Like, let's get that out of your head. You're not just another minimum wage employee. Also, you don't want to have that type of that that those kind of things, words like entering your mind, because those are toxic words, right? Don't it's not that you're just another minimum wage employee. You're an employee, but you're here for yourself, right? This is self-development, this is what it's for, right? But I, you know, like when you have somebody walking in, oh, I'm just a bartender, whatever. What do you want? I'm just a server, what do I know? It's not about that. And it's not that's not the way it is. It's that you are an impactful employee, no matter what, whether ownership, management acknowledges it or not, you're an impactful employee. If they don't acknowledge it, that's their loss, and that's going to be their loss, and it will be their loss, right? But right now it's like, hey, I'm an impactful employee. I take a lot of pride in that. And so, with that, what do you do when you greet a table? What's your what is your greet?

SPEAKER_03 50:22

When I walk up to a table, hi, how's it going, you guys? What brings you in today? Are we celebrating anything? Are you guys visiting Disney? Have you guys been to the packing house before? Or you saw it's like a two-story food mall. So it's like, are we the first stop on your guys' list? And if if so, yes. I'm like, awesome, you guys are hungry, cool. I try to get a joke in there. And like the kids start talking. I'm like, sorry, honey, you need an ID for that. I always get laughing, but like I said, I come from a big family, so I'm very family-oriented. The tables with the kids are my best tables.

SPEAKER_00 50:47

Of course. I'm dealing with them. So it's it's the fastest way to winning them over.

SPEAKER_03 50:52

And it's it's kind of like a like a misconception because a lot of the my peers or co-workers I've had in the past, like, oh, I don't want the family, kids' meals. We don't want them, we don't want them. I love my kids. I love them, and the parents see that. They see that, and that honestly helps me at the end more so, and I feel better about it. I need a break. Sometimes it's hard dealing with like the wine connoisseurs and everything. I have a family of kids, the kids are screaming, now they're not, they're smiling, they're happy. I got a little break in between, and I got some actual human, you know, real image.

SPEAKER_00 51:20

Yeah, real humans, not people putting on this, this, this facade. I like that, and also like remember like always use that as a reminder of when you're sitting there with someone and they just have the mentality of A saying, oh, it's a two-top, right? Not worth it for me, or they have kids, not like it is that that is entitlement.

SPEAKER_01 51:39

Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 51:39

That's a level of entitlement that's like depressing, right? That you're working in a job where you're saying, I I can't, as a human being, I can't go out and make more money, right? I can't go, let's say I'm making sixty thousand dollars or seventy thousand dollars as a server with tips. I can't make that money without this job. If I were to go out without this job, I could maybe make 40. So I'm kind of doubling my income being able to work a job like a server where I'm tipped because I'm tipped. Right. I should appreciate that. I should appreciate the tip factor in that, right? And understanding that tips, like we talked about, are gratuities. I'm giving you gratitude. I'm showing you gratitude for you doing something for me, right? It's a gratitude. And so I'm giving you gratuity and you're not owed it, I'm not owed it, or you're not owed it, it's optional. Right. And to sit there and go, table two, not worth it. Kids, I don't want to do that. Like, it's insane. It's insane the level of entitlement that that comes along with. So use that as a reminder.

SPEAKER_01 52:36

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 52:37

Now, if someone asks you how something is, or what do you recommend between two things? What do you what's your play on that?

SPEAKER_03 52:43

Immediately, my top two things, the flamignon fajitas, they come on a bed of bell peppers and onions. They come with the side of beans and rice. You get your choice flour corn tortilla, so that one's like the best for your buck. It's one of the pricier things, but compared to the filet, it's only like a$16 incline. You get the beans and the rice and all the veggies, or the lobster enchiladas. Lobster enchiladas are amazing. With their different enchiladas sauce than we have on our lunch menu, which is just like the chicken enchiladas, it's a suscia sauce, so it's sour cream and cheese. Comes with beans and rice too. I like my size, and if it's included in the price, even better.

SPEAKER_00 53:14

So I like that you're adding value to it. I also want you to add exclusivity. How do you think you could add exclusivity to those dishes? I can tell you one right away, but tell me what you think. What is exclusivity?

SPEAKER_03 53:31

Makes it stand out from the rest?

SPEAKER_00 53:33

Yeah, it's exclusive, right? I can only get it here. So, how can you add exclusivity with those dishes if someone asks you and you go back to them again with the let's say the fillet? I can tell you right now what it is. And I know you know if you think about it hard enough.

SPEAKER_03 53:46

Beef tallow? We only use beef tallow to fry all of our stuff. Super costly, really good for you.

SPEAKER_00 53:53

Yes, very good for you, very expensive. Right. Very and it's it's high quality grass-fed beef tallow. Okay, this is real beef tallow. This is not mass manufactured, this is batched grease tallow. Also, what about your filet?

SPEAKER_02 54:09

A talal?

unknown 54:10

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 54:11

Talk about that. That's a big deal. We this is a very expensive cut of meat. This isn't like USDA prime, which is expensive in the grocery stores, it's beyond that.

SPEAKER_01 54:20

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 54:21

Right? Where do we get it from? That's how I would know.

SPEAKER_03 54:23

Jack's Creek.

SPEAKER_00 54:24

What is Jack's Creek?

SPEAKER_03 54:25

It is a large prime farm based in Jacks Creek, Australia. It's the largest, it's the world's largest Wagyu farm.

SPEAKER_00 54:32

Okay.

SPEAKER_03 54:32

But that's not gonna be the prime, that's gonna be our Wagyu kits.

SPEAKER_00 54:34

Okay. And what about Prime? Do you know where the prime cuts? Crescent Farms. Where's that?

SPEAKER_03 54:37

That's gonna be Nebraska.

SPEAKER_00 54:38

Okay. We have a we use our get our filet, it comes from uh Crescent Farms. You know, there's an amazing meat facility in an amazing farm in Nebraska, right? All of our our all you can't even get this in the grocery stores.

SPEAKER_03 54:52

What's fun to do is our ribeye, our prime ribeye, yeah, they are all from Crescent Farms as well, but we just started our own dry age process in house. So 35 days, we actually just like took the last batch out last week. We age them in-house. So if you don't know what that does to a steak, when you cut a cow, it has no flavor. So it's anything like wine with time, it becomes more um tender, gives a little bit more flavor. That one's a fun one that I like to talk about.

SPEAKER_00 55:15

And normally, if you go to a steakhouse, that they they charge you a bunch of money for that. That's that's like the third tier up. That's all of our ribeyes, right? So enjoy, you know, and then like I said, I talked to you about it at the meeting, but then they're it's like the wine thing, right? Where they're like, this has notes of cherry and bark, and you're like, hmm. You're like, oh yeah, like you don't taste that stuff. Maybe you do, maybe you don't, but your mind's pulling for it because a person planted the seeds. So when you do that, you're planting the seeds, right? The dry aged, right? Filet, that's from our one of the farms in Nebraska. Is it from a farm in Nebraska grass-fed? It is you can't buy that in the grocery stores, okay? So beef tallow, filet, okay, lobster. Do you guys uh pull the lobster in your house? We do. You crack the lobster?

SPEAKER_03 55:55

Oh no, no, no, no, no, no. Our lobster, we get it straight off the lobster tail, so it's not like the pre-packaged stuff. We have like all of our yeah.

SPEAKER_00 56:02

So you pull it. I hope you say that to every single table. Yeah. All right, so that's what we want to talk about, right? It's called passion selling. You know, you need to talk about everything. Like that, this the lobster for sure. Like our lobster enchiladas are amazing. But by the way, like we actually take the lobster, we get the tails in, we pull the tails. They're f it's fresh lobster, okay? And when you're talking about stuff like that, sauce is made in-house from scratch, which it is, right? All your sauces are made in-house from scratch. These are where are the recipes from? You know?

SPEAKER_03 56:29

I honestly I'm not sure.

SPEAKER_00 56:30

Find out where they're from, because I know they're not from like just normal, it's not it's not traditional Mexico, it's like northern Mexico. There's like a name for it, right? So when you start saying little things like that, you're adding exclusivity, but you're also adding value, perceived value. Because when you say, okay, um, I'm gonna once you get the filet, the filet fajas, and our filet is from a farm in Nebraska, right? Grass-fed, super small farm. Um, uh it, you know, it gets flown in, whatever, once a week. And then we get uh all of our all of our tortillas are fried in beef tallows, so you're gonna taste the difference. We use premium wagu, premium wagyu, grass-fed beef tallow, whatever it is, right? The saw the vegetables are locally sourced, whatever, right? So now you're adding perceived value. Right. How much are your filet fijas?

SPEAKER_03 57:13

I guess I think those are 68.

SPEAKER_00 57:15

Right. So that's not cheap, right? So instead of giving them because they're gonna look at that menu and then they're gonna go, oof. Yeah, right. And you don't want them to do that. You want to go look.

SPEAKER_02 57:24

Show them where the values are.

SPEAKER_00 57:25

Yeah, you show them you because that's your job, right? You lead them to the value. So you say filet, this, and then, oh my god, okay. Well, now 68 bucks doesn't seem that bad. Right. Because I got beef tallow, I've got this like special filet. Yeah, I see where the cost is going. So you just add sauce is made in whatever you add, like throw it on there, especially for your brand, because you guys are doing you know cool stuff, right? And so it's like, let's talk about it. Uh Al Pastor Shore is 76.

SPEAKER_03 57:50

That's like 76.

SPEAKER_00 57:51

Yeah, so that's like you gotta really sell that to me.

SPEAKER_03 57:53

I I do, I do. I tell them like you can do like Gidea style tacos with it. You can eat it just with the caldo, which is like soup, just like a warm dish if it's a cold night. If not, you guys want to split it three ways, make some tacos, comes with beans and rice, you're set.

SPEAKER_00 58:04

Yeah, for sure. I love that. And so, but but remember, you just talked about value. Remember, remember exclusivity.

SPEAKER_01 58:10

Right.

SPEAKER_00 58:10

Exclusive. You're talking about because you're talking about value in a different way. We're you're you're you're kind of presenting value, uh, like you're you're getting more food, right? Versus you're getting quality food.

SPEAKER_01 58:20

Right.

SPEAKER_00 58:21

So more versus quality, which is fine. I like what you're doing. There's nothing wrong with that, but add on, by the way, that short rib is from Nebraska.

SPEAKER_01 58:28

Right.

SPEAKER_00 58:28

Right? We slow, we dry age it if you do. That sauce, that El Pastor sauce made in-house from scratch, it's just grandma's recipe. Can't get anywhere else.

SPEAKER_03 58:35

Yeah, it's marinated all day long. Yeah, slow, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 58:37

Yeah, we take it takes it's a it's a 24-hour process to get that short rib from from the vendor to your plate, right? Right, because we do all these things to do. We don't just pop it out and just start cooking. Right. There's all these things. So when they start talking about, oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 58:49

Right? Their mouth's watering and they're like, Yeah, they're ready.

SPEAKER_00 58:52

And then they eat it, and they're like, oh, I can taste, oh my beef, I did a beef tallow. It's overcoming my senses. Yeah, I can't I can't believe it. And so that's that's what you want to do. So they go, oh my god, right? Same with your drinks, right? Oh fresh squeezed lime.

SPEAKER_03 59:05

Those ones are easy for me to break down and describe. Yeah, we have really great drinks.

SPEAKER_00 59:09

Good. So appetizers, entrees, everything, passion self. Like you're adding value, which is cool, right? So much better than doing nothing. But we often we also want to add value up, right? And exclusivity, value up and exclusivity, because then they're gonna crave it, and when they crave it, you want them to think the only place I can get that is there. Yeah, I can't go to the place down the street and get steak fajitas. I have to go there because their steak fetitas are so pop, so amazing. Right. Um, and so that's one thing I want you to focus on too, and then another thing too is pattern disrupting. I think we talked about this maybe pattern disrupting verbiage. Yes, asking them questions about like what you know, which you do a good job of, right? Um, and trying to figure out ways to make you know genuine, honest conversation. That's that's a huge thing. And then it sounds like you're already doing it, but asking for reviews. You're asking for reviews, yeah.

SPEAKER_03 59:54

How'd you guys hear about us? Oh, Yelp, actually, that's the same way we keep people coming in. We're like the second or third that pops up on there. So if you guys want to help us get to first, because I want to help us get to first. If you guys look, I'm the top reviewed server. So if you want to keep me in my spot and help us be number one on Yelp in Anaheim, labor review. I circle my name, do a little star, thank you. Every single, every single check I do is is uh personalized to the person. Happy birthday, happy anniversary, thank you so much for the service. See you guys next Sunday at brunch because I just buyed them and they told me they made a reservation. I always do that personal experience.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:23

Nice, I love it.

SPEAKER_03 1:00:24

Because it sets me off from the rest. And those are the same things my coworkers. Oh, you're writing your number on that check. No, I'm not. I'm writing thank you so much. Do you want to see? There's a little smiley face too. Like it's the it's just something that I do. It helps me do my job to the best of my ability.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:38

Yeah, and I love that. And and that's that's the perfect way to ask for review. And you know, even if you want to get crazy and make QR codes, like business cards with QR codes.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:48

I've thought about it. I I have I have a whole AI thing. I've I have it.

SPEAKER_00 1:00:52

Yeah, it's well, I mean, you can literally go online and for like 50 bucks, you can get a hundred cards printed out, and like literally those have just a QR code, and you're like, if you just scan that, I'll I'll take care of your payment. If you want to just scan that, we can be, you know, that's actually a really good idea. And because it because you want if they leave the review, I'm telling you right now, if you get them to leave, if you have a system where you get them to leave the review while they're there, your reviews are like triple.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:11

Oh, really?

SPEAKER_00 1:01:12

Or quadruple.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:13

That's awesome.

SPEAKER_00 1:01:14

Because I I'm sure you've been there, but I've been like, I've had the best experience at a restaurant, and someone's like, Can you leave me a review? And I'm like, hell yeah, I'm gonna leave you a review. And I'm driving home, I'm like, oh my god, I'm gonna leave this like amazing review, and then I get home and like get ready for bed, and all of a sudden it's like a week later, I'm like, oh what was their name? Yeah, exactly. And then you're like, I'll do it, uh and then it just it just goes into ether. But if you're like, if they're like, Can you leave me a review right now? I'll go take care of your payment, whatever it is, right? And uh, and then they're like, Oh yeah, sure, because especially if you're awesome. Then they're gonna be like, hell yeah, I will. Absolutely. And then you're gonna come back and like, what did you think about this, right? So um, yeah, you'll see that go up. But I think right now we want to focus on is just you know, the passion selling is something you can touch up on for sure. Uh asking for the review while they're there, right? Because that's I'm telling you right now, triple what you're at right now, and and then focusing on the right things, picking and choosing your battles, understanding the situation, and coming to like full acceptance of what it is, right? I'm here to embed myself, and that's all I can do, and I don't need anything from anybody else. Not like in a I I can do it on my own, but just like I'm not expect I just have no expectations, right? I have no expectations, and I'll be here to support you as much as you can.

SPEAKER_03 1:02:22

You'll never have expectations, you'll never be disappointed.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:24

Disappointed, exactly, 110%, right? Easy to say, hard to do. Yeah, yeah. All right, well, thank you for being here. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:30

I appreciate you.

SPEAKER_00 1:02:31

Yeah, of course. Wait, before you go, I forgot to mention, right? You just got all this information. Sounds awesome. What do you do with it, right? How do I apply it into my business? Well, like I said before, I'm hosting a live event where I'm gonna show you how to do it, and it's absolutely free. So you got the information. Now I want to show you how to implement in your business and make it stick absolutely free. You're gonna get a free workbook that you can fill out, that you can take action with. You just gotta show up. For more information, see the link down below and keep kicking ass.