Breaking the Silence: Women and Self-Sufficiency

This episode explores the balance between independence, asking for help, and self-sufficiency, emphasizing how these skills empower women in all areas of life—from personal to professional. Julie DeLucca-Collins shares personal anecdotes and practical advice to encourage women to embrace their strength and seek support bravely. Key topics:

• The Instagram trend: "No one is coming to save you" and its deeper meaning
• The importance of asking for help without feeling like you're dependent
• Differentiating between needing support and waiting for salvation
• Building confidence through self-sufficiency and problem-solving
• The role of fear and bravery in asking for help and taking action
• Practical steps to develop help-seeking behaviors and independence
• The mindset shift: being the master of your own destiny
• How supporting others enhances leadership and empowerment
• Encouragement to take small, brave steps daily toward self-reliance

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

There is an interesting Instagram trend, and basically it's a video, and it says, No one is coming to save you, in quotes. And then the caption reads, For as long as blank is here, I will always be saved. And I actually did a reel. So if you're on Instagram and you follow me, you can go check it out. However, I got to thinking about this as I was doing the reel, and I thought, ooh, who saves me? And yes, I have a wonderful husband that, for instance, last night, my dog was not feeling well, and he kept asking to go outside in the middle of the night. And I took him out several times. Then, this, like it might have been like 3 a.m., I finally said, Dan, can you please take him out? Because whatever was going on with him, he wasn't doing anything for me. And here's this man who is fast asleep with his CPAP on. Kind of like, what the hell is going on? And he okay, sits up, takes a deep breath, and says, Okay. And then he took the dog out. Of course, this is the littlest of the dogs, right? And then he comes back and he's like, I think his leg hurts him. But here's the thing, right? I don't have to do it alone. Now, as I was doing the trend, the Instagram trend, I started to talk about it. Stay with me. This is all kind of ties together. I always have been the kind of person who is very independent and figures things out. I also really hate asking for help. And yet I have learned, and especially in my corporate career, I learned that asking for help is incredibly necessary in order for us to be successful. In order for us to be able to move to the next level of whatever it is, we are going to have to find the person who is already done that or who is capable or just willing to be supportive and come and help you with what you are doing. Now, when we're asking for help, it doesn't mean that we're asking somebody else to save us. We are asking for the person to do what we cannot at the moment. Or maybe we need a break from at the moment. Or maybe we need someone who is better at it so that we can get to the next place. So many of us women don't ask for help, and so many of us think that I need to do it on my own. I am broken if I ask for help. Now, on the other side of the coin, there's many women who are sitting around waiting for people to save them. You know, as women, we have her the fantasy of Prince Charming coming, riding in his white horse and taking us away. Or maybe even Calgon, if you're old enough to know what that is, take me away. And yes, I think that we can really benefit from having support, but ultimately, before you learn to ask for help, you need to learn to be self-sufficient. And you need to be okay with being self-sufficient. And it's not just saying, I can do it all, but it's saying I don't know how to do it, but I'm going to figure it out. Because there is such a great level of confidence that comes from you figuring it out. There's a level of confidence that says, okay, this is scary, but I am going to be brave. I am going to take the plunge. I am going to step up. Being able to ask for help and being able to be self-sufficient is so important whether you are a caretaker, an entrepreneur, or even in your corporate career. And I know that this is definitely a skill that we need to learn to develop. Number one, the self-sufficient skill. And number two, the asking for help skill. It is the same coin, and there is two sides of this coin. So, my friend, I want you to think about where in this world is it that you still have to rely and expect others to do the thing because you're afraid of doing it yourself. Or where in the world are you sitting waiting for you know the stars to align or for things to come and save you and things to happen? Things happen when you take action. Things happen when you decide that you are going to be the master of your own destiny. And then when you're in the process of ruling the world, it is time for you to say, how can I be a better ruler or a better leader by empowering others and having them help me? Or by just, you know, if it's the middle of the night and you're exhausted and you need to get up at the freaking crack of dawn, even though it's difficult to ask for help to the person who's sleeping next to you, and you know that they look so peacefully asleep, it's okay to ask for help. Because the worst thing that someone can say to you is, no, sorry, I'm sleeping. And then you're on your own. And then you can say, I can do it, or you can say, no, no, really, I need your help. And whatever the case may be, it is a practice skill, my friend. So here's your brave move for the day. I want you to look at the things in your life, whether it is the areas that you need help or whether the areas that you need to be the savior of your own life, and decide what is the first tiny way in which you can either ask for help and be willing to be helped, or take the charge, take the step and do it, even though you're afraid of doing it. And I'd love to hear how you are able to continue to go forward bravely, either way, because this is what makes us women of history, women who make history, women who impact the world. And until tomorrow, I can't wait to talk to you about another incredible woman who has made history and I admire tremendously. All right. And if you haven't subscribed, my friend, make sure that you do so. Share this episode so that somebody else can get the benefits of the things that we are doing together here in Brave Moves. Until tomorrow, don't forget, go confidently in the direction of your dreams. I love you so much.