Stop Listening to Promises and Start Watching Patterns

Do actions really speak louder than words?

In this episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins explores why consistent actions reveal more than promises, intentions, or explanations ever can. Inspired by a powerful quote from Maya Angelou, Julie discusses relationships, trust, personal growth, self-awareness, and the importance of paying attention to patterns instead of potential.

If you've ever felt confused by someone's mixed messages—or struggled to align your own actions with your goals—this episode offers a practical and empowering perspective.

In This Episode:

•  Why actions build trust 
•  The difference between intentions and impact 
•  How patterns reveal priorities 
•  Trusting evidence over promises 
•  Applying this lesson to your own goals 
•  The wisdom behind Maya Angelou's famous quote 

Key Takeaway

Words tell us what people hope to do.

Actions show us what they actually value.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Have you ever had someone tell you, I care about you, I support you, you matter to me, I'll be there for you. And then their actions told a complete different story. I think one of the hardest lessons we learn in this life is words tell you who people want to be, but actions tell us who they are. And if you've ever found yourself confused by someone's behavior, today's episode is for you. And before we dive in, please feel free to leave me a review, my friend. That means the world to me. And if you haven't subscribed, because honestly, I think the majority of people who listen have not subscribed, please do so. This may help us continue to bring this reminder and these episodes to the people who need it most. Now stay with me till the end because I want to share with you why so many of us ignore what is right in front of us and how paying attention to action can save us years of heartache, frustration, and disappointment. Now, Maya Angelo was right. One of my favorite quotes uh from her is when someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time, not the tenth time, not after another excuse, not after another promise, the first time. And honestly, that's hard because many of us love people and want to be optimistic. We want to believe the best in them and we we want to give them second chances. And of course, we want to believe in their potential. You know, we fall in love with potential. I think one of the biggest mistakes we make is confusing who someone could be with who they are consistently and who they choose to be consistently. You know, we do this in our friendships or relationships. We also do this in business or workplaces. I think a lot of times we think, oh my gosh, I'm going to work with that client and they're fantastic because they're going to save the world. But we miss some of the red flags. We tell ourselves, well, they mean well, or they're trying, maybe next time. And while grace really matters, and I have been incredibly lucky to have received grace from people, you know, patterns matter too, because intention doesn't create impact. What creates the impact in this world, in relationships, in our lives, is the actions. Actions are what matter. People make time for what matters. People invest energy in the things that matter. People protect what matters. And while everyone gets busy, consistency tells you a story, not perfection consistency. Because what someone repeatedly does is often far more accurate than what they repeatedly say. I was working with a client a year back for a couple of months. She was late paying her bill. And I sent her reminders and she said, Well, I'm really struggling. I haven't been able to run my business because of all these personal issues, and I have no money coming in, all of the things. And of course, you know, I wanted to be understanding and I said, Don't worry about it. It's okay. We we will work with you. And the next thing you know, it happened again. This individual was at the start of something really big. Her podcast, her business were starting to get momentum. And although life had happened to her, we believed that if we helped her, then, well, she would continue to work with us and she would continue to excel. And when she said, I cannot pay, we knew that we wanted to help her, but and we needed to be patient. At the end of the day, though, this is a person that invested $10,000 in being a contributor to a book. She didn't have the money to pay for coaching or podcasting services that we had already done, but she had the money to invest in something else, something that mattered to her. And the reality is that actions reveal your priorities. This may sound uncomfortable. People make time for what matters. They invest the energy and money in what matters, and they protect what matters to them. And while everyone gets busy, consistency is always going to tell you the story, not perfection, but consistently how someone shows up, what they choose to do when they're showing up. Because what someone repeatedly does is often a far more accurate indicator than what they repeatedly say. And we have to apply this to ourselves too. Here's a twist the lesson is not only about people, it's about us. Because sometimes we say, I want to get healthy, or I'm gonna write that book, or I want to start a business, or I want to strengthen my marriage or my friendships or relationships. But our actions often tell a different story. And that's not meant to create shame for you or me. It's meant to create awareness because our actions reveal our habits, our habits reveal our priorities, and our priorities shape our lives. For me, you know, building a business definitely meant that I needed to shift my priorities. It meant that normally traveling or being just silly in not spending as much time in quote unquote work needed to shift. And a lot of times the same thing is happening now. My priorities have shifted. I'm caring for an elderly parent. So I know that I want to say, I want to lose weight, I want to be healthy. But at times, really, what has my focus mainly is caring for my mom, taking care of the business, being a wife. And a lot of times our commitment is proven, but we repeatedly do, even on days we don't feel like it. Now, one of the most freeing things I've learned is this, friend. You don't have to argue with reality. You don't have to convince people to care. You don't have to talk to someone about showing up. You don't have to negotiate consistency. Pay attention, observe, notice. Because behavior, just like success, it leaves clues, always. Words create hope, friend. Action creates trust. And trust is built through consistency over time. So here is your brave move for today. Look at one area in your life where you have been confused. Maybe it's a relationship or a business partnership, and a commitment maybe you've made to yourself. Maybe one of these areas is what you're looking at. And ask, what do these actions tell me? Not the promises, not the explanations, not the intention, the actions. Because clarity often arrives when we stop listening to what people say and start paying attention to what they do. My friend, people don't always tell you who they are, but they always show us. And we show ourselves who we are becoming through our own actions too. So pay attention. Trust the patterns, honor the consistency. And remember, actions may not be loud, but they are honest. And that is your brave move for today.