Ep. 37: Unlocking Self-Trust with Drea Tapia

What happens when the life you built no longer feels like the life you're meant to live?

In this episode of The Low & Slow Podcast, Crystal and Laken sit down with their mindset coach and former CrossFit Coach Drea Tapia for an honest conversation about identity shifts, self-trust, and the courage it takes to choose yourself. Together, they explore the transformative power of mindset work—not as another self-development buzzword, but as a pathway back to who you truly are.

Drea shares her journey from the world of CrossFit into coaching, the grief and uncertainty that can come with personal reinvention, and the lessons she's learned about trusting her intuition even when the next step isn't clear. Through stories of vulnerability, emotional honesty, and self-discovery, this conversation offers a powerful reminder that growth often begins when we stop trying to hold it all together.

If you've ever found yourself questioning your path, navigating a major life transition, or feeling called to become a different version of yourself, this episode will leave you feeling seen, supported, and inspired to trust what you already know deep down.

In This Episode, We Explore:

✨ Why mindset work is more than positive thinking
✨ Drea's transition from CrossFit coaching to transformational coaching
✨ How childhood stories and limiting beliefs shape adulthood
✨ The role of grief during identity shifts and life transitions
✨ Why vulnerability is a strength, not a weakness
✨ Learning to trust your intuition and inner guidance
✨ Creating emotional safety and self-trust from within
✨ The ripple effect of doing your own healing work
✨ How authentic connection transforms relationships
✨ What it means to love yourself through every season of growth

This Episode Is For You...

This conversation is for the woman who's outgrowing old versions of herself, questioning long-held beliefs, and learning how to trust her own voice again. It's for anyone navigating change, grieving what was, and stepping into what's next with courage and curiosity.

Because self-trust isn't built by having all the answers.

It's built by learning to listen to yourself when the answers begin to whisper.

🎧 Press play and join us for a conversation about vulnerability, healing, and becoming the woman you were always meant to be.

Follow along, tune in, and let’s get into your next mindset shift!

It means the world to us if you would rate, like, save, share, and most importantly hit that subscribe button! And if something you heard today hit home for you, share it with your world. There is plenty of room at our table.

She looks like she has it together.
But inside, she’s tired of being the strong one.

Request A Remix! If you’re stuck or in a situation you want a new lens on, submit your dilemma anonymously below for a mindset remix from us on a future podcast episode!

Follow us on IG: @thatgirlmagic.co - @i.am.crystal.clear - @coachlaken

www.thatgirlmagic.co 

Ways to work with us: Book With Crystal - Book With Laken 

Transcript

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Welcome to the Low and Slow podcast. We're your girls, Crystal and Lakin. If you press play today, trust. You made the right decision.

SPEAKER_01 0:09

And know whenever you're listening to this, it's exactly the right time.

SPEAKER_03 0:14

We invite you to pull up a seat to the conversation. Get curious about your current perspective.

SPEAKER_01 0:20

And lean in for the opportunity to see yourself in another woman's story.

SPEAKER_03 0:24

We created that girl magic because we've been where you are.

SPEAKER_01 0:28

Here, the talk is real and the breath is steady. Let's get into your next mindset shift.

SPEAKER_03 0:36

Welcome back to the Low and Slow podcast. We're so excited for you guys to be tuning in today because we have one of our wonderful coaches, Dre, with us. And we're just going to be getting into like you guys meeting her and just welcome her into that girl magic. Like, what we got, what we got for Dre today?

SPEAKER_01 0:55

Yeah, we are very, very excited as the team continues to grow. And we are getting quite the collection of badass lady coaches up in here. And I'm very, very excited about that. Um, so yeah, so we want to make sure that we highlight Dre's debut to the DGM team for all the listeners out there and just get you guys a chance to get to know her a little bit better and her to tell her story. And so we'll we'll kick it off from there. So Dre, I wanna I want to give you the opportunity to kind of you know give us a little intro, but not like the elevator pitch, right? Like tell us tell us the real stuff. Give us give us some of the tea. Like, what's the real version? If you were just you know talking to some friends of a friends of a girlfriend at the hangout. The real version of who Tre is.

SPEAKER_03 1:47

I've been feeling not the polish. You know what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_00 1:52

Well, as soon as we start talking about the mindset side of things, that's where it's all gonna come unraveled, I'm sure. But um, you know, I've been in the CrossFit space for 15 years, and that has largely been a big part of my identity. And coming out of that space has been a journey of rediscovering like who is Dre without CrossFit? Who is Dre without her gym? Who is Dre without all the things? And I can easily say, well, I'm a wife and I'm a mom, and those are the most important roles that I have. Um, but it's a lot of rediscovering, like, what do I like to do? What are the things that I enjoy? I love working out. That's a, you know, I will always be a CrossFitter. Um, but moving away from that, what are the things that I like to do that don't involve going to my boys' baseball games or my husband's baseball games? Because that's been the world that I've been in for so many years, or going to a CrossFit comp or coaching class. And so I'm rediscovering who I am and what I enjoy, and um learning that I like peace and rest and quiet time, and that's something that I haven't had a lot of over the the last 15 years. So yeah, I'm I'm learning a lot.

SPEAKER_01 3:08

I think so many women can resonate with that journey. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:12

Yeah.

unknown 3:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 3:14

I love that you just own that too. Like I'm I'm rediscovering who that is. Like, because I know who I've been, and now it's like, oh my goodness, this gets to be a whole new chapter. And like, who do I, who do I want to be now? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 3:26

And so often it's like, who who am I as it relates to others, right? Women do that all the time. Who am I as it relates to mostly dependents, right? Like all these people that rely on me in some capacity or that I provide something for. Not to say that men don't do that, you know, they do, but I think that um because of that nurturing side and and also culturally, like what we're taught, it's well, who am I based on what I give to other people? And being blessed in a season or a transition phase where you're able to start to ask the question of who am I in the way of what I give to myself, right? Like that's that's such a beautiful part of the journey. And I think that's that's something that a lot of women can relate to. And it's something that's uh historically, I think, foreign that now more than ever, a lot of women are coming to the reality of of like, oh, like what now? You know what I mean? Like, so I think that's really, really cool when it comes to the work that we do, right? Like what was it about mindset for you? And obviously we can call this a variety of different things, but when did it when did it go beyond becoming just a buzzword for you, right? Like what did it shift for you that was felt?

SPEAKER_00 4:44

This is where it all, you know, this is my crew. Um, you know, it's funny how I stepped into my mindset journey. Um 13 years into affiliate ownership, I hadn't asked for help. Very, very classic me. Like, I'm gonna do this all on my own, I'm gonna figure it out. I don't need help, I don't need ideas. You know, I would brainstuff or brainstorm with my husband, but you know, now I got this. And then at the 13-year point, I'm like, you know, maybe I just need a little bit of help. And so we hired best hour, and um it was great, but the most rewarding part of that was the mindset program. And so as soon as I learned that they had it, I'm like, oh yeah, like I can totally like the performative side of me, right? I can check that box, I'm gonna be really good at that, and it's gonna be it's gonna be great. I'll I'll breeze through that. And um, Joel Cochrane is the mindset coach on that side of of things. And um I think we were maybe 15 minutes into the first call, and the language game we played was how can I ever get over? And I instantly started bawling, just crying. And I'm like, well, first of all, this isn't what I signed up for. Um, and second, like it made me pause. I had just lost my dad the year before. And um in that season, the year that it took me between my dad's loss and to ask for help in the business, um, I I think I completely lost myself in that journey and became the caretaker. I I was taking care of my mom. I was trying to fumble my way through the business and try to stay afloat with everything there. And so in that moment, I was like, oh, I haven't even processed this. I haven't allowed myself to feel any of this. I have been so on the go. So as soon as he had us write, How can I ever get over? I was like, the first thing that came to mind was was the passing of my dad. And that opened up a door to me that, you know, was mind-blowing and transformative. And it was early into that journey with Joel. I don't even think I had signed up for his proclivity program yet. And I was like, this is what I want to do. This is my next, my next path, this is my future, was really what what the shift was at that point.

SPEAKER_03 7:12

Lake, I'm sure you resonate a lot with that of like I'm in a space, right? Now I see this and this is what I want that to be. Like, gosh, I know that I I think we can all speak to like when we were first introduced to this. It's like I could just see that this was a a whole new world. Q aerial, right? And um it was like I think so often we we think it's this one moment, but you never woke up one day like, I'm gonna be a mindset coach. Like, no, but you have that reference point of like what that day felt like in yourself, and that it gave you like opened up a whole new door of possibilities.

SPEAKER_00 7:51

Yeah, yeah. It was the first clue into getting real with myself. I don't think I had ever really allowed myself to truly be vulnerable and share that intimacy, those those feelings, and what was really going on at my core, the the true me, the the broken me. Um, I always did such a good job of disguising that. And, you know, I'm don't worry about me. What do you need right now? Let me take care of you. You don't need to know my story. Um, and to allow myself to walk through that journey and be supported and and uplifted by a coach who came alongside in the community that I was within to lift you up in those moments where you're you're sobbing because you're finally sitting with some stories that you haven't allowed yourself to face, you know.

SPEAKER_01 8:38

Yeah, that that weren't that weren't non-existent, that weren't going anywhere, right? It's just like we we do a really good job of just like shoving them beneath a bunch of other responsibilities and things that are uh more action-oriented. Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_02 8:52

For sure.

SPEAKER_01 8:52

Yeah. I I love what you said about you know, recognizing that this is not something that you thought that you needed or was even really in your awareness at the time. I think that's so common. And, you know, a goal, I know a goal of ours and something that I've talked with Adam and Mark about too is like, I I really want mindset to become mainstream. You know, people want it to be called something different. People want a better, they want to understand it better, right? Because they can't put it in this box that that feels comfortable or identifiable. And it's not going to be because it encompasses so many other things. And ideally, uh, you know, how dope will it be down the road when it's like, oh, there are little girls saying that they want to be a mindset coach? Like they want to work with women in that way, you know. And I I speak specifically to working with women. Obviously, this is not work that's exclusive to women, it's just the direction that we've taken it in and where we feel like we've been able to make the most impact. But, you know, how how amazing will that be? You know, to see that that ripple effect over time is is amazing. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 10:01

Or even that it's like wouldn't be like uh shameful. Like, think about like before mindset work, like, and everyone thinks what mindset is is like therapy, right? And like how shame, like you don't talk about your shit, you don't air out these stories, you don't you know talk about family dynamics or anything like that. And it's like to know that when like this is moving more um mainstream, and it's an avenue that you can use a lot of different tools in your tool belt um within this work. And I think it just shows where it's like there's other avenues other than what has just been like previously told to us, right? And like you get you can start to like you can get you can start to get curious about the reality that you're creating through obviously the power of your words, your minds, your story, all the thing. Um, and I think that's really cool, like just with what we do with women, where it's we are taking them into a whole new world. We're taking them back into their world before, like who were they before they became this version of themselves?

SPEAKER_01 11:00

So it's super cool. The version that got out of touch. When it it comes to how you apply your personal philosophy to your work and kind of your coaching style, right? What patterns do you see over and over again in the women that you work with? Like where do you feel like you see the stuck points the most?

SPEAKER_00 11:24

I resonate so largely with the clients that I'm currently working with now because so many of the women that we're seeing are women in my age group facing that story of perimenopause. And you know, I used to describe it a lot as you know, we're stepping into this almost like an insult in our lives because our bodies are changing and often in ways that we don't love and enjoy and understand. And we have children who are leaving our home, and so we're navigating the loss of self and identity, we're losing our children to it's amazing, and I'm it's so rewarding to see your children leave the home and move on and become independent, but they're still lost there. And then many of us are facing aging parents and um what goes along with all of that. So I, you know, I see a lot of stories of grief. Um, and it's not just about grief of a of a loved one, but grief of maybe a life that they had before or the person that they were before. Um, that loss of identity is so, so common. Like I don't know who I am, I don't know what I enjoy anymore. You know, we get to this stage in life, late 40s and 50s, and we're like, how do how do I not know who I am and what I enjoy? I and really truly, it's it's a very interesting um journey. Like you see a lot of women who feel lost and then fearful of what their fruit their future looks like. And of course, the common, you know, I'm not enough. I think that it's layered into almost every woman's journey that I've worked on.

SPEAKER_01 13:04

And every season, right? Isn't that wild how it's like I'm still attached to this fucking belief that I'm not enough? It's and it came up when I was, you know, four, eight, ten, thirteen years old, right? And it's like it keeps showing up in every season. It's so interesting.

SPEAKER_00 13:21

100%.

SPEAKER_01 13:22

Yeah. When you think about these women and this, these common threads, right? It's like when they first start working with you and you're peeling back the onion, what does what does she usually think her problem is? And what do you usually find underneath it?

SPEAKER_00 13:43

In this particular group of clients that we work with, the number one thing they come to me with is I just need to lose a little bit of weight. I just need to make a little bit of progress or have my clothes fit a little bit better. And, you know, that's the source of the problems, or that repeating I start and stop, or I've gained and lost the same X number of pounds over and over again. So if I can stop that cycle, everything will be better. Um and it's never just about the weight, you know, it's the story that they told themselves about what that number on the scale meant, or the story that they've carried from childhood. I had a client today that, you know, the words that her grandma probably told her mom, and then the same phrases and words that her mom told her, are the same phrases and words that she tells herself now. And, you know, interrupting that pattern is so important. But, you know, that generation didn't recognize how detrimental those words were and how much we held those close to our heart. And those words shaped our identity. And, you know, it's it's incredible to hear just different variations of that same story, woman after woman after woman, and to see it myself. I have the same stories I identify and I resonate with the stories that they're telling me as well.

unknown 15:06

Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 15:06

Yeah. It's wild to see that, like, and in it's always this light bulb that goes off. And I actually love this when I see this with a client where it's like, oh my God, my mom said this to me, her mom said it to her. And then when they stop saying it to me, who continued? And they're like, oh my God, me. Right. And it's like we don't until we like zoom out and actually like, like, because they've heard it so often, it's like, oh, okay, that's normal. But then we've then we've adopted it. And then it's like a lot of times when they're now the mother, they're like, Well, I'm I want to get this in check because I don't want this to, you know, affect my daughter, right? Or I don't want this to like be passed along. And it's like, yeah, that interrupt is it's it's so interesting. And I think when we resonate with, I mean, we say all the time, like this work, we we are helping women because we understand what it's like to also have a story that's like that, right? And to see yourself in another woman's story. Is there one story in particular, or not like a client in particular or anything like that, but like um something current to what like where you're at now of where you really see yourself and resonate with um what's coming up for these women, like one area in particular. Yeah, the caretaking role. Yeah, like the archetype, like which archetype? That's a better, better way to do it.

SPEAKER_00 16:29

Yeah. That caretaking role of, you know, and I saw it so largely with the passing of my dad, that need to step in automatically. And like, I I'm I'm the oldest um sibling, and you know, it was that need to step in and take care of everybody else. And, you know, regardless of what I need, I've got to take care of my boys, I gotta take care of my sister, I gotta take care of my mom. I, you know, and and we're just running on empty and expecting ourselves to continue to be successful and produce and run the business or be successful in our jobs and be a good parent and all the things, and never giving ourselves the space to refill our cup, never giving ourselves the space to rest. Oh, I'm reading a book. Well, I shouldn't be reading a book right now. That's I've got other things I've got to do. Let me occupy my time and space with things. But really, if you look at the big picture, I'm really not getting anything productive done. I'm I'm just spinning my wheels and learning that hey, we don't have to take all of this on independently. We can ask for help. We can reach out to other people to support us and they can, we can accept that love. That was really difficult for me. And it still actually is to accept that somebody's gonna come along and support me and and cheer me on and um rally behind me that I'm not the one that has to be the person that's that's doing that for them.

SPEAKER_02 17:53

Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 17:55

I think that goes along with uh not only, you know, common stories that come up, but when it comes to the way that people perceive mindset or mindset coaching, there's a lot of fluff in the space, right? Of, you know, well, just think positive, or no, you were gonna reprogram your subconscious, or you know, shit like that. And what do you believe are is the worst or um the most common preconceived notion that's working against women coming into this work that they've already done the work, like I've already come in, I've done I I say positive, that's a common thing I hear.

SPEAKER_00 18:37

I don't talk negatively to myself or I I tell myself positive things. Um I don't have any stories that I need to work on. That's dealt with that. Yeah, yeah. And you know, truth be told, when I stepped into this space not knowing what it was, thinking I was gonna check a box, that was my story. I don't have anything to work on. Like I'm great, I'm a positive person.

SPEAKER_01 19:00

Um I'm successful, I'm doing the things I want to do. Like, there's no problem.

SPEAKER_03 19:04

I'm blessed, right?

SPEAKER_00 19:08

I have my husband, my home, my kids, all those things. I'm so blessed. And even on that side of things, right? I'm blessed, but it's also okay to have stuff that we need to work on. And and for whatever reason, I didn't feel like I could have I I didn't feel like both of those could be true at the same time.

SPEAKER_03 19:26

Yeah, that they could coexist, like which is like part of the permission, right? Of like I, or it's the duality that, yeah, that it's admitting that there's some shit that has affected me. And like now I get to take ownership and and do something about that. But when like I this week was working with a client and everything now maybe is fine, but she has all these feelings that are coming up from shit 25 years ago. And it's like, well, why am I feeling like this? I just want to feel happy like I used to, right? And it's like, gosh, it's also the permission to just like even if things are not like that right now, that doesn't invalidate what you what did happen before that you have have unprocessed.

SPEAKER_00 20:10

Right, right. Permission to feel, permission to feel the to feel the shit. I mean, it it was almost not almost like it was really that I just banked them away and stuffed them down and pushed all the things away so that I didn't have to feel them because I didn't think that I deserved the time or space to be able to sit in it, you know?

SPEAKER_01 20:32

Yeah, that's huge. Like you're not allowed to process it.

SPEAKER_03 20:36

Yeah. Where where do you feel, Dre? Like and as we're talking about this of like emotions, like permission to feel. Um, I think it's so often of what we like a misconception of like what it means for a woman to be strong, right? And I know you guys are both like CrossFitters, all the things, right? But the I'm a retired CrossFitter. Yeah, I understand. That's in that world, right? Um like where do you in now that you've done this work, find yourself? Like, do you find strength and vulnerability? Or like where how have you redefined strength from how maybe you used to see it?

SPEAKER_00 21:18

Strength originally to me was I I don't ask for help, I don't need to talk about my story, I can shove all the things down and pretend that everything's good. That equals me being strong. I'm gonna take care of everybody else because that equals me being strong. Um, even in this transition of retiring our business, being able to say, no, that's that's not what I want to do. The guilt that went along with that originally, I'm like, I don't have anything that I need to feel guilty about. This is a choice. I'm choosing me and I'm choosing my family. And that's okay. It it I deserve to make that choice. That is. Strength now. Being vulnerable enough to share the stories and the reasons behind it, to talk about losing my dad with others and not feeling like, oh, that's not emotion that I want to share with somebody. And knowing that strength means that I can share my story, and somebody else might be able to see themselves in that story and see that, like, there is an alternative to what I'm feeling right now. And there is a path through this. And on the other side, it does look a little bit better than maybe where I'm sitting right now. That part.

SPEAKER_01 22:37

Yeah, the this work is not easy to do on yourself, right? Even when you teach it. I would say actually, especially when you teach it or when you facilitate it because you know what you're getting yourself into going in, and you know how deep you can go if you choose it, right? And outside of, and it may be adjacent to or or in tandem, but outside of, you know, the initial surprise of what happened when you started going there with the story around your dad, what what other work that you've done on yourself with yourself or even with another coach, right, has genuinely surprised you, or maybe something that you didn't see coming that you were like, oh shit, there's that too.

SPEAKER_00 23:22

Gosh, I mean 40 some years of layers of stories, you know. I I think starting out initially, you know, it was the story around my dad and working through that, and then stemming back into even more uncomfortable stories of my 20s and doing batshit crazy stuff that I'm like, God, I wish I could just take all of that away and and never really being able to face the truth or sit in that. Like it was easier to be um the victim in those stories than to take ownership for some of those stories. So the growth that happened there, you know, Mark, um, you know, getting into Mark's work with the Unlifted program was very coach-focused while still working on our stories. But I'm really, really grateful that coming into this space, I did my own work first. I spent time there because it allowed me to really grow as an individual, as a mom. The way that I parent um now is very different from when I parented my older, my older boys. Um, the conversations that my husband and I have learned to have with each other after doing this work. I mean, it it there is not an area of my life that has gone untouched in these methods. And it there's not necessarily like a direct through line of like Joel helped me with this and Mark helped me with this. It was just this steady, gradual willingness to go back into stories and peel back those layers and continue to dig deeper and allow myself to do the work and to feel the feelings and come to the opposite side knowing that when I put that story back on the shelf, I actually have a more organized process story versus this jumbled box of shit that's falling all over the place.

SPEAKER_01 25:09

Yeah. Yeah. Isn't it um it's when you when it's like self-selected, right? And I think this is the difference between um when our clients choose to continue on, right? It's like when I know what I'm potentially getting into, right? And I'm selecting, I'm choosing it, I'm I'm surrendering to this process. It's the what is available to you in that is so beautiful. And to be able to say, like, oh, I'm I'm willingly going there, that's when it gets to have this big ripple effect. That's when it gets to, you know, touch all these places in your life, like you were mentioning. That's amazing. In that process, a big thing that we focus on a lot is the idea of self-trust, right? Of like women coming back to their intuition, of being able to be aligned with their like their own inner truth of like, can I keep promises to myself? Can I trust myself? Can I, can I listen to my intuitive hits? Where is doubt coming up the most, right? Where am I trying to outsource my belief for you personally? Where is an area that you used to doubt yourself a lot or that you didn't necessarily trust yourself with yourself? And where has that shifted for you?

SPEAKER_00 26:31

Interestingly enough, even though I didn't ask for help with the business, that was a really strong point for me. Um, there would be interactions from time to time with people that didn't sit right. I always feel like I've had a good ability to read people and connect with people very well. And there would be these moments where something just didn't sit right. And I wouldn't allow myself to listen to that nagging voice in my head. And so I'd go along with, you know, a higher or whatever the case was in that particular story. And then it would always come back and I would say, I knew better. I knew that that wasn't the right choice. And I went ahead and went along with it because you know, my husband is the best, but he'd be like, Dre, I I don't think that that's I think you're just reading into it. And I'm like, I'm not reading into it. I I feel this very, very strongly. And as time has gone on, I think he's even learned, like, her intuition is telling her that this isn't right. Let's go ahead and pay attention to that because we've seen it play out over the years of like, oh yeah, you know, when she feels that something's a certain way, we need to listen to that. She she can trust that. I can trust that now. And now he kind of follows suit and like, yeah, she's probably 90% right in whatever that decision is. So we're gonna go with that direction. Um, that's where I noticed it the most. Um, but even just recognizing, you know, when somebody's feeling a little off, I I can sense that really well. And and, you know, so being able to offer a little extra support in that moment, you know, that I still at my core, that's who I am, and and that's who I will always be. And it's the best part, I think, of of me and can also be my greatest weakness. Um, but it does allow me to come along and serve and support others in the way that that I do. And I think it's been the gift that I've been given, you know, over the years.

SPEAKER_03 28:28

I love that. Like as your as you strengthened your relationship to your intuition, it's like then God, that's that your husband's like, yeah, she knew. Like I could trust that then too, right? And it's like, I don't know. I think uh whenever whenever I think about a woman's intuition, it's like, yeah, the man may be like the head, right? But like we're the neck. Like we have something within us that like we can't explain. And if we have that relationship with that and that muscle is like worked, and you know, it's online for us, then it's like, yeah, like that is for our kids, for whoever, for clients we work with, for our husband, whatever. It's like that is that's special. I love that.

SPEAKER_00 29:09

Yeah. Being able to trust this transition was important, you know. That they came down to a lot of trusting my gut. Is this the right time to close the doors? Is this the right time to make this big pivot in my life and make this shift? And, you know, for the first time, I trusted that I was making the right decision. I I have not at one point doubted that this was the right decision for me and for the family. And that feels really freaking good.

SPEAKER_01 29:37

Yeah, I think so many women struggle with that, right? When they're on like the precipice of a big decision and there's all these opinions swirling, and it's very, very easy to what if, you know, all these worst case scenarios. And I think that, you know, I've it's funny that you say that because I've been having a lot of conversations with clients recently about, okay, well, if you were to be really honest with yourself, like what would you do for you?

SPEAKER_02 30:04

Right?

SPEAKER_01 30:05

Like if you weren't worried about what was gonna be the outcome and how it was gonna affect anybody else, like what would yourself be telling you to do? Like what would the version of you that you're working towards, what what would she want? You know? Yeah. And I think being able to access that part of ourselves is a journey in and of itself for most women and something that we've kind of fallen out of touch with.

SPEAKER_03 30:28

Yeah, because it's like, who are we without the fear, without the worry, without the opinions of others, without the judgment, shame, guilt, whatever we want to say. It's like the can we start to, I don't know, not not so much question our emotions, but just hold space for them and see them as signals where it's like, God, I if I took if worry and fear wasn't on the table, I could actually just trust what was coming up in that moment. Like, God, what what a concept.

SPEAKER_01 30:57

Yes. And also seeing it as some as data, right? It's like, okay, well, I can't. There is no bravery without fear, right? Like if when I overcome this, not if, but when I overcome it, I get to, I get to clock that. I get to clock that data. It's like, yeah, I did that. I did that thing. Right. And then I can take the next step. I think that's so powerful. But it's like we allow ourselves to be in this in this freeze response. And I'm like, okay, well, you can sit in this familiar spiral of hell. And yeah, it might, it might feel quote unquote safe but miserable. Or you can take any action, and whether it's the right one or not, you're gonna learn something from it either way, right? So it's it's either gonna work out or you're gonna learn something about yourself, right? Like if you look at it that way, there is no lose.

SPEAKER_00 31:46

Right. And that feel fear of failure holds so many people back. It it's it's a it's a cage, it's a jail. I'm afraid I'm gonna fail. And and learning that you're never gonna fail. It's just a learning experience. You're at you're adding to your bank of knowledge. And if we could get more comfortable with that perception and that possibility of, okay, maybe, but what's on the other side? What if I just succeed? You know, what if I don't fail and I succeed? We never give ourselves that option. And um, yeah, yeah, that's a very common thing in in stories as well, is you know, well, I I feel like I'm failing, I feel like I'm not successful, you know. What if I make this decision and it's the wrong one? Well, you made the decision, you know, and it's gonna be okay. It's all gonna be okay.

SPEAKER_01 32:36

Yeah, it's like very rarely is something not figure outable. Right. Right. When uh when you think about the work that you do with these women, what is your what is your favorite thing that happens? Like the either the favorite outcome or the favorite realization or the favorite like moment.

SPEAKER_00 32:58

My favorite moments are when they realize that they are capable of so much more than what they've allowed themselves to be up to that point. And then not only do they realize that they're capable of it, but they take steps into that path. And this would be more the clients that I've worked with on my own that I've seen through longer journeys. Um, but seeing them open the business or pursue a hobby that turned into a business or, you know, create these amazing. I have a woman who created a nonprofit, and that is just expanding into something way bigger and richer than what she even thought was possible. Um, and being able to clear out the stories that were holding her back so that she could step into who she truly is and what she's capable of and fully believe and embrace that is incredible because she will also be helping women. And so it's really rewarding on the opposite side to see them living their full potential, enjoying the life that they have and looking in the mirror and liking themselves again. So it's it's a hard place to look in the mirror and not like who you are.

SPEAKER_03 34:11

We know that you are currently going through your L3, which is so exciting. Um, give me a timeline of like, okay, we decided to transition and we're gonna close the business, and I'm going to right like before you found us, like right, you committed to L3, and then like how how aligned did this feel for you when like when you came into our world?

SPEAKER_00 34:36

Oh my gosh, all the pieces fell together perfectly. I couldn't have asked for things to have fallen together any better than what they did. And it goes back to day one with the mindset work. I think if I were really honest with myself and had allowed myself to trust myself two years ago when I hired the business coach, it wasn't really because I wanted to continue to pursue this. I think at that point in time, I knew really that this I was wanting to shift. And I I spent the time working with Joel. I knew really early in this is what I want to do. I saw the impact he had on my life. I knew that I had the ability to connect and relate really well with people. People generally liked to share their stories with me. Like as a nutrition coach, you know, it's never just about nutrition. And so we would, we would get into heavier stories with clients then. And so I knew this is this is what I want to do. This is what my future is gonna look like. So I finished with Joel. I took my L1, finished my L1, and you know, wasn't gonna be the certification girl because that's where I was in the CrossFit space. Like, oh, I got to get every certification under my belt because that'll make me good enough, you know. So I was really aware of that going into this process, but I also knew that the exposure to it and the ability to hone this craft was gonna allow me to create a future in this direction. And so I took my L2. Um, and then I can't I can't even remember how the L3, but it was like one right after the other, right after the other. I knew I wanted to keep going all the way through this. And so at this point, I think it's September that I'll finally be done with the L3. But that all these pieces led up to this. And I really do believe that shifting my confidence and my belief in myself and working through these stories got me to this place. I think had I not done the work, I would still be spinning in the same stories and the same disbelief, and and I'm not good enough. And, you know, I'm never gonna be able to put myself first or put my family first. You know, I'm gonna keep, I mean, I I I love coaching. I don't want that to be misconstrued. I've always loved being a CrossFit coach, and I like to being a CrossFit owner. I didn't love being a CrossFit owner. Um, you know, and to be able to shift into a place where I can just come and support and love on the clients and do what I'm best at. Like it's it's like fate. It's like everything was it was perfect. Meeting you guys was the highlight of of my year. This has been amazing, and I'm so grateful to you guys. But it really truly, I feel aligned with the people that are are in my circle now. I feel I feel like I'm home. I feel like I'm where I belong.

SPEAKER_03 37:28

Oh God, we might chat on that one. I love that. I love to hear that. And gosh, something that you said really stood out of like, I could just, you know, you liked being the owner, right? But that you could just get back to like what you were really passionate about, like being in your magic, just coming in and just like doing the thing. And like I think, you know, your personal testimony with that shows and that's where that passion like came from, right? And it's like now I want to do this for I get to do this for so many other women, and I get to move out of like, you know, okay, this was cool, this served me for this time, and now I get to transition, and that's beautiful in itself because it's a really big permission slip for a lot of people who stay stay where they are because they tell themselves that they can't. And um, yeah, we're just God, so aligned. We're so we're so freaking happy that it worked that you know worked out this way and that you're here and that any of anyone listening, if you get the opportunity to work with Coach Dre, like fuck, you're we're you're lucky, you're one of the lucky ones. So thank you.

SPEAKER_01 38:32

How Dre, how would you describe your unique coaching style? Like as you've crafted it along the way.

SPEAKER_00 38:40

I think that I have the ability, like I said, that that connection, that ability to connect with people. Um, I have not had a lot of difficulty getting people to share their stories with me early into their journeys. Um, and I'm I'm grateful for that. I don't know what it is about about me that they lean into that. Um, but because they're willing to be so vulnerable right away, we're able to tackle a lot of the the sticky stories pretty quickly in. Um you know, I'm very I'm very in tune with the with the method, you know, the the four-step method, tried and true, it's a part of every single one of my sessions um because the it's the magic works, right? It's so it's so flawless in in its execution. It's been the thing that's allowed me to move through my stories and see through the opposite side. But I also like to integrate um nervous system regulation. Like where's where's our breath? Where's our body? And I know um some of the girls pull in some really cool methodologies with their with their coaching. I don't have any expertise in any of that, but I have the the methods. So it we're just very, I don't even know how to explain that, just very basic in my in my coaching style, but I give them the space to really be heard, the time to work through their stories, to come to the conclusions and the answers on their own without feeling like I've got to nudge them or prod them into a certain space, and being able to hold that for them, being able to allow themselves to feel emotion and cry and hold that space well for them. Um, so that they learn that they don't have to apologize when there's tears and that they can feel the feelings. Um, I think I hold that space well for them.

SPEAKER_01 40:30

Yeah, I think it's just providing that stability.

SPEAKER_03 40:33

Yeah. That's that earthy fire combo about you. Like they're gonna feel the earth of like, yeah, you're held here. You can open right up.

SPEAKER_00 40:42

Yeah. My last client, she said something along the lines of like, I just want to lay down and take a nap after I'm done with you. She's like, not because it's boring, but because I feel like so relaxed and comfortable and at ease when I'm done. And I'm like, that's perfect. That's exactly. I want you to feel so comfortable and safe with me, so seen, that you know that you've got this rock that's carrying you through these challenging hard stories that you're about to walk through.

SPEAKER_01 41:08

Yeah, because how many spaces are these women in where they feel like they can actually fully downregulate, right? Where they can actually put the fucking armor down and be like, oh, like I can be held in this space, right? Rarely. Right.

SPEAKER_03 41:20

Rarely, or even have someone like let them know, like, I got you through this, like whatever it needs to be, however you need to be, show up, express, whatever. It's like, okay, like someone's got you, and you can receive that. I think that's so hard for women to even allow themselves to receive it or to give themselves permission to like open up in that way. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 41:40

So it's a different kind of I got you, right? It's not um I'm not gonna do it. I'm not gonna do it for you, but I'm well, it's I got you without expectations. I got you without needing something on the other side of it. I got you, it's it's the unattached presence.

SPEAKER_03 41:59

Yeah. I mean, yeah, maybe it's even like with the words, it's not I got you specifically, but like you're held here, like you're supported, you're like I'm providing you the safe container so that you could just be whatever you need to be. Yeah, yep, yeah. Okay, so good. So, so, so good. Um I want you to think back to we ask um we asked all the coaches that we've had on um thus far this, and it's honestly one of my favorite when Lake and I Lakin and I interviewed each other um in the first couple episodes. God, that feels so long ago now. Um but can you think back to your most challenging time? Um, a challenging time in your life, uh this version of you, what would be advice or something that you would tell her now? Oh gosh.

SPEAKER_00 42:56

Don't be so quick to feel like you've got to stuff it all down and take care of everybody else above yourself. Like it's okay to feel, it's okay to cry, it's okay to sit in the story and you know, look at the different lenses and the different angles. People didn't come to intentionally hurt you. I think there were definitely some spots in my life where I, you know, I very much put myself in the victim role and they did that to me. Like, stay curious about people. Like I if I could have known that in my 20s and all the way, all the way through, right? Like stay curious, be willing to ask the question, you know, what what's making that person respond that way? But more importantly, what's making me respond this way? You know, let me let me sit with that for a little bit. Let me stay curious about what's going through my head, being in touch with my body, you know, understanding that all of this, when we're trying to stuff it down and we're trying to hide it away, manifests itself in totally different areas. And learning to be like I can be so intuitive about so many other things, but I can't be intuitive about what's happening in my own body because I'm not listening. And to learn to listen and trust my body, right? Yeah, like you know, this weird knee pain that happened six months after my dad died and didn't go away and shows itself every anniversary. That's really weird.

SPEAKER_01 44:22

Is it on the right knee?

SPEAKER_00 44:24

It is my right knee. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 44:26

Weird.

SPEAKER_00 44:27

Weird on your masculine star. So bizarre. Yes, yes. But like just love yourself. Be okay to trust yourself. Listen to yourself. Give yourself the space to feel and to be, right? Just to be. You know, who who are you? And and love that person. Love and love that version because that version is gonna change in your 20s and your 30s and your 40s. And now I'm sure that's gonna shift when I turn 50, you know, and and it's okay. And love that person fully in every one of those in those decades and transitions of life.

SPEAKER_01 45:07

Yeah, and choose love while you got her.

SPEAKER_00 45:10

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:12

Yeah, seriously. Dre, what are you most excited about in the future?

SPEAKER_00 45:23

Oh gosh, this year is you know being able to help take care of my family. I've taken care of my family as the nurture and the mother in a lot of ways, but really feeling like I'm contributing in a different way to my household because the shift is different. You know, the the career is different. Being present more, um, no matter how many boundaries you try to set up in in the CrossFit space, there just was it was hard to keep those boundaries. You know, I'm very much inclined to pick up a text at 10 o'clock at night or midnight or whenever the random hours that people decide to text. Um, you know, because I want to I want to love on them and I want to care for them. And knowing like I don't need to be available at five o'clock in the morning all the way until 10 o'clock at night. I'm available from this time to this time. And my family and I deserve to have that peace and spend time together and take care of each other. Um, I have a kiddo who um we found out has dyslexia. And so it's we're learning, we're learning so much about that journey for him and supporting him in that, and to know that I can come and be fully present with him at the end of my day and give him what he needs and what he wants in all of this, and to have time for myself. Like it really truly, I'm like, what am I gonna do when I'm not coaching? Like, you know, it's silly, but I've had some mornings where my schedule has allowed me to be home and going into the garage and getting a 30-minute workout in on my own. I didn't have to drive anywhere, I didn't have to go anywhere. And come back in and freshen up, and I'm rejuvenated and excited for the next session and cook some meals at home, and it feels really uh peaceful, and it feels like my cup is being filled again, and that feels really good right now.

SPEAKER_01 47:18

Yeah, when you're able to like increase your own capacity when you take care of yourself in that way, create enough space.

SPEAKER_00 47:24

Yes, that has been much neglected over the last 15 years.

SPEAKER_01 47:28

Yeah. You uh you dropped a little nugget earlier about the fact that you are the oldest daughter, yeah. Right. And I I was wondering, I was like, is our entire team oldest daughters? I think we might, I think every single coach within TGM may be an eldest daughter. We'll have to fact check that. I know.

SPEAKER_03 47:49

I'm like, is Melissa I can't remember. I think everyone else is for sure.

SPEAKER_01 47:55

Yeah, we'll have to double check, but I I I think that might be the case, which is pretty not consequential at all.

unknown 48:02

Yeah, not consequential at all.

SPEAKER_03 48:04

Job title we didn't sign up for, but we get anyway. Yes. One little tidbit, and I know that we talked about this um like when you first came in, like when we like are all introducing ourselves, and I just want to put it on here for the record. I'm like, I need to look up your human design, but that Taurus sun, that Virgo moon, like there was at one point when you're talking, and in my head, I'm like, your Virgo moon is showing, right? Like, what the space you hold for these women, and then God, the Sagittarius rising, like you really are the perfect like compilation of like that earthy fire combo that just I mean, like that full sensitive on herself, and that just also shows that like for other women that that's possible. And we're just we're just so honored to have you a part of our team, have you in our world? And for anyone that gets to work with you, yes, they're like you have a dope ass coach, right? She's gonna lead you to, she's gonna lead you. You need to be able to be willing to drink, right? But she got you, and um, yeah, we're just we're honored. We're honored that you took the time to chat with us and just share your story. Is there anything else that you want to share with our listeners or share with any maybe of your clients that are listening, or anything that you want to round us out with today?

SPEAKER_00 49:26

Well, first of all, so much gratitude and appreciation, really, to you guys and allowing me to fill a part in this team. I feel so aligned with the journey and what you guys have uh created is incredible. You are helping so many women, and that impact is is powerful. And I'm glad I get to play a small role in that. Um, for the people out there who are considering mindset coaching or are doing mindset coaching, or maybe you're like, I don't know what this whole thing is about. I don't have to lean into it and trust it and allow yourself to get through the uncomfortable because on the opposite side, it's transformational. And I know that is also a buzzword, but I am not the same person that I was two years ago. To be on the opposite, and I'm not gonna be the same person two years from now that I am today, but that feels like real growth and that feels like potential and like I'm stepping into my purpose and who I'm supposed to be, and that's a really, really great feeling. And I love that we as a team are able to come in and help women discover that and find their purpose.

SPEAKER_01 50:40

Yes, ma'am. And there is no small contribution. We are a small team and you are a major contribution, as is everybody on the team, and we appreciate you for that very much.

SPEAKER_03 50:49

So yes, equally God, we're so happy to have you. Thank you so much for your time today, and we will see you guys in the next episode.

SPEAKER_01 50:59

Sounds so please, please, ladies. If you are watching this on YouTube, come here. Subscribe. Lehman, please subscribe, right? Is it really, really helps us out a lot. If you are on Spotify, make sure that you rate this individual episode. If you are on Apple Podcast, please make sure that you rate the show. Hit us with those five stars. It makes a huge difference. So please, please, please, and thank you. Means the world to us. It costs nothing for you. And give Dre her flowers. We want to know if you like these episodes or we're bringing coaches and other guests on, or if you just if you ever get tired of just me and C just yapping about shit, right? So, like, give it give Dre her flowers. Please, uh, please reach out if you are interested in coaching and working with her. We would love to continue to flood her with clients who she is making a huge impact with. And we will catch you guys in the next episode.

SPEAKER_03 51:51

Yeah, Dre, before we go, can you let people know how they can find you or stay connected with you or like follow more with your journey with what they've heard today?

SPEAKER_00 52:02

Right now, um, Coach Dre on Instagram or my mindset page on Instagram is it's long. Mind ship from chaos to clarity.

SPEAKER_03 52:11

Love it.

SPEAKER_00 52:12

That's okay.

SPEAKER_03 52:13

They need to know where to go. We gotta send them. So thank you so much. We'll put it in the show notes. Yeah, we'll put it in the show notes, and thank you guys again for tuning in. We'll see you in the next episode.

SPEAKER_02 52:22

See you.

SPEAKER_03 52:23

Bye.