Emily's Pajama Party

EPP: Meet Jane (She trains a lot. Like, a lot a lot.)

• Emily • Season 1 • Episode 34

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We all choose to move through life in the path (hopefully) that works best for us. Jane found jiujitsu and incorporated it into her already active life. She started training a few times a week and quickly transitioned to training 6 days a week, often times multiple sessions a day. I really enjoyed talking to her as she is explained the structure and support to make it possible. Is this the path for everyone? No. Did she make it sound pretty reasonable? Absolutely. I appreciate that 'one size fits all' doesn't apply to jiujitsu.

SPEAKER_01

Hi everyone, welcome to Emily's Pajama Party. I'm your host, Emily, and I'm so glad you're here. Over here in the little cozy corner of Emily's Pajama Party, each week I get to interview some amazing folks that are going to make the sport of Brazilian Jiu Jitsu accessible to any who try. My ultimate goal is to share stories, make some friends, and encourage the mat to grow because there is room for all of us that want to do it. So learn a couple things, laugh a little bit, and then join me on the rest of this awesome adventure. With jujitsu, I feel like there is no shortage of lessons to learn. And unfortunately, I feel like I need to hear things many, many times in order for it to stick. So, part of each show, I like to talk about ways that I can get better because I get to research ways, talk about things, re-listen to things, and maybe this time it will sink in and become a little bit more automatic for me. When I think about pivotal lessons to learn, I think I can remember the exact moment when I heard about the importance of space. Big people want space so they can they can move and smash and really throw you around. Small people might not always have that luxury. So it can be an advantage really for anyone. You want to stay connected so that your opponent has to carry your weight and so they can't generate the same power. So I have to remember to glue to them when I'm passing, stay tight when I'm on top, and don't give any big gaps because tight wins fights. I try to imagine myself like water. Connect, connect, connect. I'm always keeping that contact because it's not so easy for me to just pick people up and throw them around. So the stickier I am, the better the game is for me. Also, as a side note, I was about to stop that and move on. And I realized that no other context in my life would that make sense or not sound weird. But you know, jujitsu is kind of that funny sport where you say all sorts of weird things you never thought you would say. One of the cool things about Emily's pajama party, and I've mentioned it a couple times on the show, is that it's given me a chance to talk to strangers I find online and talk for an hour with somebody that really I wouldn't have met otherwise. The cool same thing could be said about my training partners. Sometimes we get on the mat and you might have the hi, how are you? And make like little inside jokes or whatever because you share that mat space. But what I love is that it gives me this podcast gives me a chance to sit down and really dive into what has brought someone to the mat. Just like the outfit someone puts on, you just we don't always think about the process. Maybe the ring came from their grandmother, or maybe the shirt was a gift from someone that used to be really important in their life. You just never know. So I got to sit down this week with my friend Jane. Um, we've been training together the last couple months. She is sweet and friendly and helpful. I love working with her because she's just so easy to get along with and she brings out the best in me. So I asked her to be on the podcast, and then I'm always like, oh, what am I gonna find out about this person? And she was one of those people that her story really surprised me. I knew from our past conversations that she trained a lot, like a lot, a lot. I know that I have a really busy schedule between my kids and work and life and whatever. I get on the mat two, three, four days a week, sometimes more, sometimes less. And it's just weird. And she's on the mat a lot. She's on the mat at least six days a week, oftentimes training twice a day. And when I hear about that, I guess my brain automatically goes to this type A driven, wanting to go, bro. Like, I don't know, like that's a lot of time to be doing something. And so I was really fascinated to hear how she balances her life and what it looks like. And so you get to hear along about her journey and what training looks like. And it really surprised me in kind of the best way possible. She made it sound very attainable. I'm like, what's this? Me thinking about training more. But I love what she brings because it might inspire you or reach out to someone that needs that little nudge because we all get to where we are through dedication, structure, understanding, patience, a little laughter. So come along with me as I talk with my friend Jane. Jane, welcome to the show. I'm so glad you're here. Hi, thank you for having me. Hooray. Okay, so how would you introduce yourself to someone who doesn't know you?

SPEAKER_00

Um, so hi, my name is Si Chen and I go by Jing. I had just finished school not too long ago. I'm still looking for a more serious job at the moment. At the moment, I'm just doing a lot of private tutoring for money. And I like lifting, I train jujitsu, I like traveling and eating good food. And you have a really cute cockatiel at home. I do, yeah. I I was thinking about bringing him on my head, but I'm too scared that he's gonna make too much noise. He's taking a nap right now.

unknown

Oh, I love it.

SPEAKER_01

I love birds, they're just they bring such energy and they're so tiny. I don't know how it's possible. Okay, so we were talking about having you on the show. You the show centers around jujitsu. What does jujitsu look like in your life right now?

SPEAKER_00

Um, I think my life I want to say evolves around it right now, at this moment. Um, it's definitely part of my daily routine. And yeah, I my current current priorities are jujitsu and you know my tutoring, so at work. So I feel like I plan my days based on them and including my recovery eating and everything. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Nice.

SPEAKER_00

So how did you get into jiu-jitsu in the first place? So I started the beginning of 2023, I want to say. At that moment, my husband had been training for a couple of years already. So I've been seeing how the sports goes for a little bit, and I wanted to try it, but it's kind of spooky because you know you get so close with other people, all the sweating part of it. But yeah, at that moment I was like, I'll just try it as part of New Year's resolution. And if I didn't like it, I that's the worst thing could ever happen.

SPEAKER_01

Did you start attending classes together, or did you go to a women's class, or was like he your buddy at the beginning? It's so scary. Fine. It's so scary for me to start new things if I don't have a friend to go with.

SPEAKER_00

I think I did a little bit of both at the beginning. So, because before I officially started going to classes, no, my husband would be showing me stuff at home. And uh, when I eventually started going to class, like sign up and stuff, so it was nice to see other females at the gym. But like it was a co-ed situation when it started. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

What made you keep wanting to come back?

SPEAKER_00

I think for the most part, is the community. I've met so many great people at different gyms, you know, people with different backgrounds, age, occupations, different personalities. And another thing is I like the idea of the continuous learning. Uh, there's just so much to learn. There are new things every day, and different people bringing different styles of rollings and stuff. And because uh the sport is very interactive to begin with, it makes it very fun to learn.

SPEAKER_01

I I I think you're right. It's so nice to have that community piece. I feel like the community is like what sucks you in, and also the idea that there's just limitless amounts to learn, that even the people that have been there 10, 12, 20 years are still learning, refining, relearning all sorts of things.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, for sure.

SPEAKER_01

Now, did you guys start did you start at the same gym with your husband? So, like, did you already know some of his friends there? Was that part of it too? Or was it a different place?

SPEAKER_00

I met them. So, for example, if my husband was competing at let's say Naga or some local tournaments, I would go support, and then I met a few of his buddies from the gym, but it's not like I already knew them, knew them. They just seem like nice people doing what they liked, you know?

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I guess you get to know people really well in jujitsu real fast.

SPEAKER_02

Sure.

SPEAKER_01

Now it's an interesting transition because you talked about a little bit the work thing and the jujitsu thing. At what point did it shift from something that you unless you I don't know, maybe you started going six days a week. When did it switch from like one to two days to really being a primary secondary focus in your life?

SPEAKER_00

I feel like when I started it, I don't think I started six days a week. Not that I know of. So sometimes when I had time, like, because if I don't go, I'll just be home doing, I'm sure I'll be doing something else anyways, but still like when your significant other is going anyways, it's easy or for you to just go in with them. For me, when I realized I was called invested in jiu jitsu was before I started jujitsu, I was more focused on weightlifting. And I feel like because that requires a lot of you know planning on your eating and and everything like that. I feel like my days or like my nutrition recovery were more evolved about weightlifting. But then at one point I was like, oh, I'm starting to go to jiu-jitsu more, and I feel like my body cannot recover the same way it used to be. So, and at that moment I was like, I kind of had to choose, right, if I wanted to focus more on weightlifting or I want to focus more on jujitsu. So at that moment it was maybe one year in I started jujitsu. I feel like I was shifting more focus on it.

SPEAKER_01

That's such an important part to realize. Like, I'm struggling with that too. Like, I want to be able to lift to be strong, but it is a different energy and it's a different kind of exhaustion when you're on the mat and trying to be happy with both because you can't give 100% to both of them. Exactly, yeah. Oh, that's a lot. Well, it sounds like you I it's it's fun to hear that you had such a weightlifting background. I feel like a lot of people in jiu-jitsu don't necessarily lift because they spend so much time on their mats, and just what a service you are doing for your body to be able to keep up with that like mobility piece and the strength part of it too.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, a funny side note because even before my husband started training jujitsu, we would be lifting together, and then we were like, yeah, I want to go heavy and stuff like that. And I started noticing that he wasn't lifting as heavy anymore when he was started training jujitsu, and then I used to be like, I did not understand what's going on. And when it happened to me, I was like, uh-oh, it hit, it clicked in my head. I was like, that's what's happening.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

So when you were all in, what does that actually mean to you?

SPEAKER_00

Um, for me, when I hear the phrase all in, I feel like I'm not always in the all in phase. The only time I actually felt like I was all in was trying to get ready for a competition. That was my only comp for now, too. Um, but I feel like because I train a lot on a daily basis. I feel like the training part is just a normal day for me. But what's different is to actually pay attention and be intentional about recovery that comes with sleeping, eating, drinking water, and not drinking alcohol. Yeah. So yeah, I think that's the the mentality that you wanna be on this as much as possible is falling for me. And then on a daily basis, it's just making the most time, making the most of my mat time. So when I'm on the mats, I want even if I'm not optimal, I want to be able to do techniques or even just sitting there watching people roll. I think it's part of learning experience as well.

SPEAKER_01

So every episode has a kind of a focus. And so when I knew that you were training a lot, I'm like, this sounds like someone that's all in. That's where the came question I think came from. But I like that that can look different at every age, every moment and period of life. And so I really like the real part that you bring to this episode and what bring to the mess. Because I think if we're talking to women that are married, women that have children, women that work a lot, women that are in school a lot, you can still devote a lot of time to something, but it doesn't sound like it's your whole personality. There's a lot of facets to you because you are you care about your nutrition, weightlifting is really important to you, family time is really important to you, work is important to you, and you found a way for jujitsu to fit in there. It looks seamless from the outside. I'm sure it takes a little bit more prep to make it happen.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think it comes with all the support system you have to. It is difficult. I admire, oh, because we know a lot of female who have, you know, kids. Like you yourself, you have kids, and then you have, you know, your day job and stuff. I admire that a lot. That takes a lot of energy and discipline and everything to do that. I think I in on that note, I am very fortunate at my stage of life right now that I don't have too much of responsibility to per se to be sacrificing, and no, I can't I get to choose what I want to do at this moment. So I'm very lucky for that part.

SPEAKER_01

I love that the next question was do you see it as a sacrifice structure or something else? So it's like an audience plant. We like set the ball up for that one.

SPEAKER_00

How do you see it? Well, I don't see it as sacrifice yet, like I said, for my current life stage. I feel like sometimes I imagine what when, like maybe in a few years, if we have kids, we will definitely have to, if we there's no way we can commit the same amount of amount of time and effort, right, in jiu-jitsu for sure. At that point, I think there will be more trade-off. For now, for me, it's more I see more like a structure because I really love a good structure and routine. It keeps me going, not only just physically, but also mentally. I feel like, I mean it's been a while, but I feel like when COVID hit, it really messed up with my mind because I had just graduated from college. I had a job, but I had to leave eventually because of my visa issue and stuff. Um, so I was just home, not doing anything, and then just eating and stuff. So that really messed me up for a few years. And being able to rebuild this routine through jujutsu, also meeting great people, that really helped me a lot. So I think structure is more of the answer to this question for me.

SPEAKER_01

I like structure, and it's kind of funny. I'm a kind of a wiggly waggly kind of person. Like I do a lot with um what's the word I'm looking for? I like intuition, but I I kind of guide and I feel and I can shape and I can be flexible, but I like the structure to keep a pace. Otherwise, I feel this that this organized piece, kind of that rumble, can kind of get away from me. So I agree with you that it's really nice to have that structure. Yes, there's a class at this time, yes, I could go here, yes, I'll be with this person. And also the, I guess, accountability too. Like they're gonna be there, they're learning new things, I want to learn them too.

SPEAKER_00

That's true, yeah. The accountability is for sure, yeah. And the people, like the learning the the content that we're learning of the people that are gonna be there.

SPEAKER_01

I think it's interesting. I think about like my pre-training days or different periods of my life. When I heard that someone would devote so much time to something, I'm like, wow, I have I might have ideas of what that person be might be like. What do people misunderstand about someone who trains as much as you do?

SPEAKER_00

I feel like people would maybe think that while they really want it, like they're very ambitious about it, really hardcore about it. Because it it is in martial art, right? Like people might think, oh, that's kind of scary. And then but I feel like people, especially in jujitsu, I think there's so many styles and stuff. It's not like we're always just go, go, go, go, go, wanting to. It's not like we want to hurt people. People don't train martial arts to hurt people for the most part. But yeah, and another one would be sometimes people, even our training partners, think we're younger than what we actually are. Just just the fact that we're able to go in all the time and having that energy. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Um, and also funny, like, I know I'm not gonna be a pro athlete. I might train a lot or I might do this, fill in the blank activity. And I know I'm not gonna get to like make this my professional career, but I think it's still fun to train. I'm fine again, you're as you're right. Like our all training looks a little bit different, but we can still devote a lot of time to something and not expect to be the best of the best of the best, and I'll be okay with that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that's I agree. It's a I think training, because it's definitely not a linear progression kind of sports, right? So it's a very humbling experience to be just on the mats.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Absolutely. Okay, so what does a typical day look like for you training?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, so during the week, I usually wake up around 7 and then drink my coffee. I for my morning, I'll usually either go lift or I'll do laundry. It comes with a lot of laundry. And then I'll go to the morning or noon class at whichever gym I go to that day, which starts at 11, then come back, shower, eat. If I have time, hopefully I can take a little nap. And then I'll go late afternoon. It's my working time. I'll go tutoring for a few hours, usually like call it four hours, something like that. And then I have my evening training, depending on the day. Sometimes starts at 6:30, sometimes starts at 7. And then shower and dinner, and then go to bed.

SPEAKER_01

So a full week of training, how does that play out? Because it's like lifting, can't lift every day. Training, sometimes doubles.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, um, so for me weekends like Saturday and Sunday, I'll stick with either one class or one open mat. Um, so and then Friday I take it light on to do so. If I wake up early in the morning, I'll go to morning class. If I don't, it's okay because it's my leg day. So yeah, so saying that Friday through Sunday, I am more focused on lifting. I would do my heavier lifts during the weekend, and then during the week, Monday through Thursday, most of the days I would do double classes for jujitsu, and then those days I would either do light or mobility lifting or I'll do laundry.

SPEAKER_01

I know everyone has like different class experiences. Do you end like your 11 a.m. class like gassed? Or do you feel kind of peppy after everyone's training hits a little differently? I tend to leave, I think, a little bit more gas on the tank or gas on the tank. I tend to be have I could go one or two more rounds. I often hold myself back. Do you feel like I'm exhausted? Do you feel energized after class? Because two classes is a lot. I am so impressed on double training day, people.

SPEAKER_00

I think for me, I actually pref like on the days I do double up, I prefer 11 o'clock as my heavier training session. For some reason, just works better for my body that way. I feel like sometimes when I train in the evening, I tr when I train harder in the evening sessions, that's usually when I get hurt. I think my body is more optimal during 11 o'clock, like morning classes. Yeah, for me, it's that way.

SPEAKER_01

How does that work with the recovery piece? Making sure you I love that you've added recovery as being like a foundational piece in your weekly schedule. What do you do for recovery?

SPEAKER_00

Actively I would have probably two days at the gym just working on functional and mobility work. Um and other than and that comes with I learned it the hard way because I had injuries and stuff, you know, knees and my hip and weird stuff. No, things happen. So that's how I started trying to build active recovery in part of my exercises. And then other than that, I would try to drink water, take my supplements. I think sleeping is really important. Frankly, it helps me the most in terms of recovery. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Now, did you talk to with PTs, nutritionists, trainers to get this information, or has this been something that you've researched on your own? Do you kind of work with other people, kind of follow what they do? How did you find the secret sauce to keep everything balanced for you?

SPEAKER_00

I think it's a combo of everything. So I well, this is not suggested, but I usually don't go to doctors. I've only been to PTs when I'm like really messed up. So that helps me building my rehab routines in terms of the exercises. Nutrition part, because my whole family, not my side of family, but my husband's side of family, they're all very active. So it's kind of it kind of runs in the family that you know what is good for your body and things like that. Supplements, it comes from that background too, but I asked ChatGPT.

SPEAKER_01

I have this really weird list of supplements that I take, and it was like some Instagram endurance runner thing where like snapshot this and take all of them. And I'm like, I don't know what like iron glycinate does. Or like it's not, it's not even right the name. I have to go look at it now. But it's like, take this every other day. I'm like, Roger that, and I have no idea what it does, and I should probably look it up, but I'm sure it's probably good for me. And they sold it on Amazon.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, because I'm really scared of doing my own research these days because they're so good at tracking your history. I would be looking up one little thing, and that products start to pop up on my Instagram feed, but then knowing me, I'm like still click on it, and then looking at everything. More research comes with more ads, and then like, no, I'm done.

SPEAKER_01

All of mine are like thyroid, anti-inflammatory, perimetapausal, and like cats or something like that. That's actually I do get a lot of jujitsu content, I should say. My favorite is when my non-jiu jitsu friends will send me jujitsu memes. I'm like, oh, you thought of me. Oh, that's funny. Okay, how do you structure your training across jiu-jitsu on weightlifting? You talked about lifting heavy on the weekends, and you talked about watching as your husband started training that he wasn't lifting necessarily as heavy as he used to. How do you kind of work it out so both of those really get met? Or do you do you let yourself go and stop? Like, I like a gold sticker and I like a sign that, like, yay, I got to click it to a heavier weight. Do you have to relax your expectations?

SPEAKER_00

I did have to do that. So before starting jujutsu or the early, earlier, like the first few months starting doing jiu jitsu, I was still because you know, weightlifting compared to jiu-jutsu is more linear for the most part. You'd be like, oh, like you said, you unlock a new weight, or you try something new and it's really working this certain part of your muscle, you feel it burning. I had to for sure the mark or the goals for weightlifting had to I had to let go of that for the most part. It's not like I'm really targeting new weight like for a certain amount of time anymore. I think it's interesting because I still try to keep that for a while, or and then you notice you're you're smiling because you know it happens to everybody, like anybody who wants to balance between different sports. It's just uh yeah, I think I had to experiment it for a while until I feel cozy about my current schedule. And I feel like it's probably gonna keep on changing too, depending on you know how schedule shift, and maybe I finally get a real job and I have to and I have to work around with that too. So yeah, I don't know if that answered your question.

SPEAKER_01

Well, I think you're right that everything evolves and changes. What is working at this moment, and what are the signs that everything is fine? Like I had my weird freak injury in December, and I haven't been taking it easy, and now I'm in a boot, and I've been two weeks now with no running and no jujitsu. And so I've been trying to lift every day for anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour, depending on my schedule of what I'm doing. And one, it like freaks my head out to think I'm not doing the cardio because I'm so used to running almost an hour every day. And also with a jiu-jitsu piece. And I'm still okay, but I'm I'm clicking the weights higher. So I feel like the weight is increasing now. And I'm also not as tired. It's really funny. I'm like, what else is getting healed right now because I'm not on the mat? But I really like doing all those things, but I think it's kind of a good wake-up call. Like, what is realistic to put on my body right now? Because I know absolutely for certain I'm not drinking enough water. I could increase my protein intake, and I'm for sure not sleeping enough to sustain what I was doing before. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00

No, it's yeah, it's interesting. I feel the same way because um I had oh, I got this word. I got um bersitis on my elbow right before we were traveling to China. And then it was like a week before we left when I got it. But I still wanted to go into the gym, even though I'm not sparring, I still wanted to go drill technique and stuff. But you know, there's still impact. Uh no, it doesn't matter how careful you were with it, there's still impact on your joints and stuff. And while we were gone, there were this call it six days in a row that I wasn't doing anything. But I still lifted, but I wasn't on the mats. And I came back up, whoa, my elbow feels so fresh. It doesn't take that long or that much. It's just we needed to chill. Like you said, it's your body's giving you a little signal that you should probably be careful with something. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I was I had to get the boot and I and I he said I could go through insurance, but I didn't want like two weeks for it to get it. So I'm like, can I just Amazon it? So I said, okay, two things. I'm like, did I make it worse? He's like, probably not. And I'm like, can I go to class tonight? Because I don't get the boot till tomorrow. And he's like, No, have you been listening to anything I just told you? And I was like, Well, I'll take it. So I I chose not to, but it's really hard. It's hard. And I said, Can I go on the stationary bike? He's like, No, you clearly have not rehabbed it at all. It has nothing's attached. So let's try this before we look at surgery. I'm like, fine.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, sometimes it's more tough to not do anything. It's totally yes, absolutely.

SPEAKER_01

So, what does a hard day versus a good day look like? Because that's a big feeling.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think for me, a hard day if I get injured that day, it's definitely a hard day. Or, like you said, some days we feel more exhausted than the other days. Those could be hard days too. And sometimes or sometimes when you're learning a new technique and I'm just like, oh man, I don't get this. That can be frustrating sometimes. But a lot of other than like an injury injury, usually by the end of the day, it turns to a good day for me. So yeah, everybody's a good day. Other than I get injured for me, I think.

SPEAKER_01

I struggle. I had two previous guests on the show, one Connie, she talked about behavior. And she's like, when your body gets used to quitting, you get immediate relief when you quit. So you're like, should I go? Should I not? Should I go? And as soon as you decide, no, I'm gonna stay home and take a rest today, it's like, ah, like immediately you get the relief. And there's something to be said about pushing through and being like, no, I sh, I I don't, I've never regretted going to class. Like I've always been proud. When I get there, I see a friend, I learn something I didn't know, and it's and it's great. And then I talk to the other guest, Lindsay, who's like a nutritionist and talking about like women's cycles. She talks about listening to your body. And I'm like, which one is right? Like, should I stay home or should I not? Because my body says stay home, but I know mentally I want to be stronger, and it's just a challenge sometimes to figure out which one to listen to.

SPEAKER_00

I think we all have our own little system in our heads, right? I think some days it's easier to distinguish if it's just a lazy day that you can push through, or if it's a day that you should actually listen to your body. You know, like it everybody has their different norms and standards when it comes to that, but yeah, sometimes it's a little looser, sometimes it's a little more strict, but yeah, it's definitely different perspectives, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I definitely try earlier in the week to keep pushing. Like if it's a Thursday, Friday, I'm gonna be a little gentler on showing up if I've made it. But if I already if I use my one rest day on like a Monday, I am like really taking chances that the rest of the week is gonna be go okay because I'm like, I don't want every day to be a rest day. That's hard.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I understand.

SPEAKER_01

How do you stay consistent training those six days a week?

SPEAKER_00

Well, I think we kind of touched on the recovery part a lot already, and then it's really important for me is to have support, you know, from because you it's hard. It's difficult if your spouse or your family, whoever you live with, no, don't support what you're doing. Yeah, for the most part. I think sometimes even we we've talked about it like when we even don't spar, we can go in and then learn techniques and stuff. Yeah, it's mostly for me it's just the body, if it's recovered or if it's injured. It mentally or routine-wise, it's not uh too much of a problem for me to come in to the mats.

SPEAKER_01

So you might have an update like every once in a while. Do you ever feel burned out? Or is it just kind of a every once in a while you just might feel a little bit more?

SPEAKER_00

I sometimes do, but I feel like the burnout don't how do I put this? I feel like I'll get injured already before I get burnt out. So, and uh it took a while for me to experiment how the schedule would be, because I tr I've tried doing three classes a day. Like I would do three. I've tried doing like because right now I've done during the week I do mostly twice a day. Before I would do two days, I'll do three classes, and the other two days I'll do two classes. And that for sure made me burn out a lot faster than what my current schedule is. So it yeah. I guess it's better that way that I started like so much, and that's easier to, you know, soothe it down a little bit.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I feel like I get like novelty sits in whatever I'm doing, and I want to do so much of it. I'm like, I like with my students at school, I'll be like, oh my gosh, here's this really cool song, this, that, whatever. Like, I want to do it seven times a day. But I have I've gotten to the point now where I can tell myself, is that sustainable for six months? Is that sustainable nine for nine months? And if I'm gonna burn out and not do any of it after six months, I'm like, is like once a day a reasonable expectation to keep in through the school year? Twice a week, whatever the case is. I try to start off kind of slow burn and then like build up after a couple months rather than like having to taper. So good on you for saying let's try it, but realizing maybe not sustainable.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, because like because you mentioned school year, because you know you look you have outside responsibilities that you kind of you have to make sure that's taken care of. So for me, I have the fortune that I can experiment with it a little bit.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, so I feel like the body would be one part, but when I go to class, like okay, so when I'm rolling, I try to be really intentional. I'm like, okay, I've been learning a lot of stuff from daily Heba. I'm like, I'm gonna get into Daily Heba and I'm not gonna panic. Like, that's like the number one goal. But every time I go to class, I'm learning three classes means could be like three very different techniques, or maybe if it's the same instructor, like ghee from the same person twice, they might be teaching the same thing. Do you that would be a lot of to retain? It would be hard for my brain to kind of make sense of that.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that's a really good point, actually. So we cross-train a lot, so it would if it for me, at least if it was three classes a day, it's always different coaches, different techniques. So it it is a lot of information, like there's no way I can nail down every single thing, right? But the nice thing is different coaches have different stuff. So, for example, when we were at COBOL, you know, like um one coach they would focus on this one thing for a few weeks, a month, call it, and then so gradually you are able to retain a little more. I think at one point uh I told myself, as long as I can get one main takeaway per week from one coach, that's a wing for me. Because I think it comes with everything, like even if I don't go as frequently, I don't train as much, I still probably cannot remember every single detail, right? It's difficult. There's so much, like little, so many little things that you have to remember. So yeah, and that I actually thought about it because if if is it efficient or effective to go to so many classes a day? Because can I even return that much information? And um, after a while I still think, yeah, if I have the time, definitely I would still go to as many as possible, whatever my body can take. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I think there are so many different lenses in what to look at that, and I think that's the beauty of the sport because I think in the beginning, I mean, still, like such a beginner, like everyone is showing me how to do this stuff, which I so appreciate. In the beginning, I was like, I'm learning this one technique. I'm gonna learn pull the arm, grab a collar, do a whatever, whatever. I have to do it exactly right. And then I don't know, a year and a half into training, it was like, oh, the goal is to get them off balance, or the gift goal is to get them to post or whatever. That it doesn't matter what happens next. You just are trying to force them to make some sort of thing. So I think I don't have to learn one coach is one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, the next coach, A, B, C, D, E, F, G, the next coach, red, purple, green, blue, whatever. Because in essence, it's just, am I working to off-balance some? It's like working on like those like global or like overarching ideas rather than the nitpickies of each technique.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, that's a that's really good point too. I think I didn't realize that until, you know, a while into the sports. It's like you said, you don't have to it it's the main idea that's important. And I think a lot of coaches they like share similar. Like, I mean, the main idea they're very similar, but it's the approach that they take are different. So it's nice to see, you know, it's like from point A to point B, you can either go this way or that way, or that way, all right. So it's nice to see different styles, different perspectives. Yes.

SPEAKER_01

I think that's what I love most about jujitsu. Like I went to a seminar and Paige of that was teaching like a single leg, and she's like, when they go to try to guillotine you, do this. And then right after I went to class, and Professor Nick was like, You actually tuck it here, so they can't guillotine you. And I'm like, same thing, it was a single leg takedown. In essence, it's very similar, but like cousins versus twins. Like they were not the same technique, and neither was wrong. It's just a different outcome because sometimes they wrap their arm on one side of your head, sometimes you're on the outside of the body, sometimes they're a lot taller than you, sometimes they're the same size as you, and you can't rely on one thing necessarily, or you have to feel what's right for you. And that's really hard, I think, as a beginner for me to understand that, but I appreciate it more and more as I am in the sport. Like everyone can do it differently to work for their body.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, for sure. I agree. I think at this point, I'm sometimes you know you learn a new technique and then or new position, and you're excited, or you want to focus on this for a few, I don't know, a few weeks that you want to just focus on developing your system on this technique, and then you realize you're forced, but then you got too excited, and then you're forcing it instead of seeing other options from there. So I that's been happening to me a lot still, and then it's interesting because some like you said, we it's a very reactive. I mean you could be proactive about it, right? When when I'm I believe if you're really good at it, and then you can set up stuff, that's how I see it. But then it's really reactive, or you gotta see what the other person's reaction is, or like you said, their body type, and then your body type versus their body type.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Definitely. I think it's funny. Gosh, so many times I've learned something new, and I'm like, I'm gonna use it. And the other person's like, I could see you looking for that a mile away. It's like you were staring at my right knee the whole time. Hunting the hunting the submission, and I get so like laser focused that I completely miss the left foot in range or whatever. And I'm like, I want that knee.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, it happens to me a lot.

SPEAKER_01

Oh my gosh. Okay, so when you're going to all these classes, typically do you two go together, or is it like the day classes you go, you join each other in the afternoon, you and your husband?

SPEAKER_00

It depends on the day, on our schedules and stuff. For I wanna say mo for the most time, my training is a subset of his. He trains more than I do. Like he can pull off three or four times a day. I don't know how, but yeah, he's able to do that. Yeah, when we can show up together, we would, but if not, we'll just pull solo and then yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Okay, so I'm curious because I have known spouses that like work at the same school, right? Both one, they're both teachers or whatever, or like they're both educators, or they're both in the same field. And some people then will go home and be like, chatter, chatter, chatter, chatter, talk about work, talk about work. And others I know, like my principal, his um girlfriend isn't in education. He says he doesn't talk about school at all. Like they go home and like watch their shows and go to concerts and listen to records or whatever, and they don't work stays at work. Do you find because you spend so much time on the mats and sometimes together and sometimes not together, do you talk about it at home? Or is it like we've done so much of it together? You it doesn't necessarily talk about it the same.

SPEAKER_00

Um, we don't actively talk about it unless you know sometimes we go to different gyms, different classes, and we're like, hey, what did you guys do today? And then so it'll be a short conversation. Yeah, we don't actively talk about it because a lot of our training overlap. But we do watch a lot of jujitsu reels or videos together, and then we'll be watching TV, non jujitsu related TV, and then he'll be grabbing my ankle and then colocking me. So nothing too verbal. Physically, maybe.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah. I feel like if you hug and are not fighting for the underhooks, does it even count anymore? Like I go in to get a boyfriend a hug, and I'm like, I try to sneak my arm in now, and then he's like, ah, and then it's two, and it just becomes like a diving game.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Or you're just standing there, and all of a sudden you can't like a you feel the arm flip around and you like tuck your chin to avoid the rear naked choke. Yeah, that's our daily life as well. I even my um oldest at home is 18 years, he's an 18-year-old, and he used to wrestle, and he will do that to his younger brother all the time. Like he I look over and he's like sitting on top on top of him or whatever. And I would totally do that with him, but he is like strong and he doesn't know his strength and he doesn't know jujitsu. And I'm so afraid if I were to try one of those things, he would just like throw me across the room or elbowing me in the dust. Because he wouldn't mean to, but he just doesn't know how to do it safely. At least you guys know the right way. Like if I had to worry about someone grabbing my feet for a heel hook, my gosh.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, that sounds pretty dangerous. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, yeah. There's all there's we balance such a fine line, right? Like the things that we're doing, some of it is kind of wild. And it just a little too much pressure or a little bit of a weird angle could really hurt somebody. And so learning and refining that and just being really safe with our own boundaries or what we'll do with others. I was talking to a physical therapist the other day, and she said she would a hundred percent rather get somebody with like a choke than to like mess with somebody's shoulder or elbow or wrist or ankle. She's like, I rehab these injuries, I don't want to cause any potential injury in anyone else.

SPEAKER_00

It's kind of funny. Yeah, because they always say it's better to just put them to sleep, right? Than breaking their stuff because then they would have to deal with it, have more to go to.

SPEAKER_01

And some people just don't tap very easily, like they're gonna be stubborn about it. And I'm I get trying to find your sweet spot or how far you can push or whatever, but sometimes I'm like, nope, it's not gonna get any better. We were working together a couple weeks ago, and every time I turned, you got a little bit tighter, and I was like, Well, I'm cooked. Oh well, let's at least restart so I don't spend the next three minutes or yeah.

SPEAKER_00

I think different, like you said, different people train a little differently, especially when they spar. Some people like to test their limit, and then yeah, and then sometimes people match their energy, sometimes they don't. So it's it's nice to you know be training with people that you know or you trust, and then that you actually get to train, you can feel comfortably say yes or no to your training partners. Yeah, absolutely.

SPEAKER_01

It's it's scary. Like my favorite probably is a person that can get me just to the edge and just hold it. I am completely immobile, I can't go anywhere. And you can you look over and they give you that look, and you look back at them and you're like, oh you, you could hurt me right now, but you're not, and I can't do anything about it. Okay, we can be done. Training and working your life around it and changing around. Do you feel like jujitsu is part of your identity now? Do you feel do you when you meet new people, do you kind of talk about it? Or is it just here I am, Jane, and I do lots of fun things?

SPEAKER_00

I don't I feel like if I just meet a random person, which I usually don't. I feel like I only meet people at jujitsu. Like I don't bring it up unless they ask. I feel like the only time I would bring it up is if I show up somewhere randomly with bruises on me, visible. And then they'll be like, Are you okay? And that's when I'm like, I'm fine, I just train this sport, you know. Yeah, I mean, deep inside, yes, I think it's part of my identity, but I do I introduce myself like as a main part of me? I don't think I would.

SPEAKER_01

It's like when you get a black eye, you're like, I'm good. I just, you know, my friend rolled me on my face.

SPEAKER_02

Exactly, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

It's there's like an old joke. It was like, how do you know if somebody's run a marathon? Don't worry, if they have, they told they'll tell you about it. I feel like earlier in my life when I was still discovering who I am, it when I like found my passion with running and things, it was so new because I hadn't had something other than school for so long, like take off so much of my life. So it's like, I'm gonna talk about it everywhere. Maybe I'm like that with the podcast. I'm always hunch hunting for guests for the show. And so I'm always like, So I have this podcast. Do you know anybody in jujitsu? Are you in jujitsu? Uh but yes, it's like I've learned more hobbies. It's it kind of melts into me versus being something I want to come back and talk about all the time.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think it also depends on like what what the personality you have, right? Like sometimes people can use that to connect with more people, like in in your case, you know, that's nice. For me, I am not a big I talk a lot. I was gonna say I'm not a big talker, but I I think about it, I talk a lot. Um, I'm more introverted, I especially when I first meet people, so I usually don't initiate that kind of conversation. So yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I was gonna say, and you're so friendly. You were at my first class at the at Kobo, and Nick's like, be partners with Jade. And you were so kind and just easy to work with, and I so appreciated that. It was a really nice welcome to the gym for sure.

SPEAKER_00

It's it was funny because I had just started at the gym too, so I was making friends as well. But yeah, it was really nice meeting you at Kobo, yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, you're a great training partner. I'm always like, yes, Monday, Wednesday night. I bet Jane's gonna be there. So okay, so what has jujitsu given you outside of the sport?

SPEAKER_00

I think I just feel more comfortable in general, like around people. So I feel like before I'm still introverted, we we had just talked about it, but um I think I don't feel like all crawled up when I'm in public. I feel like more safe in some sort of context. Cause there was one incident before I started training. Not that it's the reason I wanted to get into martial art, but I was just walking on the street and some random people came up to you and they'd be like, you know, like they wanted to fight you and stuff. So I feel like I feel more com and after after that incident for a while, I was like, I don't want to be on the street by myself. Did somebody come up and try to fight you? I don't think they tried to fight me. It was frankly also during COVID, so I think they had some sort of um, you know, against people. So yeah, after that I was like, I don't want to be on the street by myself. I want I want my husband with me all the time. But now I feel a little I mean a lot better. No, I'm like I'm gonna pull guard right there if you want. Yeah, I just feel like um confidence in self-defense sense, and then no b and we've talked about it that it's a really humble experience, so I feel like mentally I'm more strong that as well. Yeah, and then and I feel like I have my people, my community now, so that makes me feel more comfortable.

SPEAKER_01

I'm really sorry that people can be so rotten. There's lots of different times, and it sounds like you handled it as gracefully as you could have. So I apologize for that.

SPEAKER_00

Oh then thank you. I appreciate it.

SPEAKER_01

Uh it's okay. Uh I'm nice and strong now, so there's a lot of situations, and then I guess sometimes I think it's like a woman thing or being smaller. Like you never know how to be safe, like in whatever situation. And so I will, even if I know a couple things, I will not actively seek out fighting. But if I really don't want to be put in those, I'm never gonna go out and get in somebody's face because we know, like in training, we see what can happen even in controlled settings, and we know, like I always say, I know how hard the concrete is. I don't want to end up going there like anytime. So that's not fun. But but as we start looking into how your evolution of training and things like that, do you think your level of commitment is for everyone? Do you think this is possible for most people?

SPEAKER_00

Oh, I think if we're talking about the hours that I put in like on a daily basis, it's definitely difficult for people who have to work, you know, nine through five every day. Like it's I will say there's no way if that's what we're talking about. But yeah, but if we're just talking about that you wanna go in, let's say, every day or two, three times a week to have a hobby or to actually you know, our my definition of awling is just that you're making the most out of your med time. So I think that's for everybody. I mean, it also depends on if you have the support system at home, if you are financially stable, maybe you could put more time, more effort into it. Yeah, that's very important as well. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I think you were wise to talk about like what your life looked like in the schedule. And as you said, you found structure. Some people might call it a sacrifice. I know that because I haven't been training and running, my life looks really different. I'm like, oh my gosh, I can schedule more dinners with friends now on weekdays, and I can go to more events without having to reschedule when I go to Costco versus training. Like, I don't have to plan a 6:30 a.m. training session because I can't go to the 6 30 p.m. one. And so others might call it something different. They might call it a sacrifice, and you're like, no, I'm just choosing the structure of my life. And I could also choose, I could read like 50 books a year if I did not go on Instagram nearly as much. Or I could lift more if I chose not to. I I do paint by numbers and my it's like my guilty pleasure on the side because it's really mindless, but it also gets me off Instagram. I can choose one or the other. Like we all are making those choices, and I don't know if it's necessarily one's better than the other. I just have to decide with at the end of the day what I'm happy with the life that I'm living. Does that work for me?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, for sure. It's just trade-offs, right? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01

Absolutely. And when you look ahead, what does that what does your training look like, do you think, in the next couple of years? Do you think you'll can continue on this trajectory? Will you add more?

SPEAKER_00

I think oh, talking about if without kids, I would like to keep the same. I wanna be able, I wanna try to compete maybe once a year. So and so during that like comp preparation, I wanna see how far I can push my body, and then from there I feel like I can plan better, you know, maybe for the next few months or next year, what kind of um training schedule would work better for my body at that point. But if with kids or kids, then that's definitely a different story. So hopefully, if with babies I can still come back. Definitely not twice a day, maybe at least once a week, hopefully.

SPEAKER_01

Yeah, I feel like it's one of those nebulous things that we don't know till we get there, and sometimes things click into place and it's seamless, and sometimes it's tricky. But I love your attitude that it's going to you're you're open to opportunities and flexibilities, and I think that's like the best thing moving forward. I like I used to say that the word hope was like a bad word to me because it was a really challenging place to live in. Because when I hope for things, my brain takes a moment and lives in that reality. And so if something derails my plan, not only does that reality not happen, but I also had the immediate happen. So it's like a double sad. So I love that you're like, it could be this way, it could be that way, and all of them are okay because they're all just different.

SPEAKER_00

I think I I'm leaning towards more like this, like you know, more flexibility these days. I used to be very much planned, like this has to be at this, like uh, you know, at this age, it has to be what's done, what is done, or like what time of this day something has to be happening right now. Like everything. It's like a little more culty version of structure. And I think now I am it's nice to be a little more mellow on that, because like hope or plan, like they are it's good to have them, but can't have that much of expectation of the outcome, in my opinion.

SPEAKER_01

I think what I love most about this interview is I the idea that somebody is really eat, sleep, breathe jujitsu feels very type A and it feels very intense. And it feels laser focused with a singular goal. And I think I love what you your story brings out is there's a lot of ways to look like. Yes, you do all those things for your life, just absolutely does not revolve around it like completely. It's a large part of it, but there's so many parts to you, and you're willing to understand that things might change and you're okay with all of that. And I think that's really neat to see that appreciation of how it applies to you in this moment. Awesome. Yay! Thank you so much, Jane, for talking to me. I'm glad this worked out so well. It's such a fun conversation.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, thank you, Emily, for having me. It was fun talking about because a lot of questions, you know, I don't usually think about it on a daily basis, but it's nice to that you ask the questions. I'm like, oh, I gotta think about that. And then yeah.

SPEAKER_01

I think there is, I feel it especially. I'm gonna say it's a misnomer, but to be good at jujitsu, you have to so many people I hear of training six days a week. They watch the videos and they do the training on all the YouTube things, and they have like the coolest gear, and they take all the supplements, and it's like, ah, I'm falling behind. And it's like, who am I racing against? And I totally can understand that I shouldn't set that expectation for myself. But so I love all the stories, so I really like that you were able to come in and talk about yours because everyone has a different level of commitment, and this is yours for right now, and it's really working for you, so that's really cool. All right, thanks, Jane, for being on the show, and I hope to talk to you again soon. I'll see you soon, hopefully. Yay! Yay! So, my shout-out today goes to something goofy, but it's been on my mind to do as a shout-out for a while. When you start rolling with someone, you do like little hand slap, fist bum, high five. It's weird. It's like a little greeting, it's like I respect you, it's here I am, I'm ready. It's kind of all those things mixed into one, and they are endlessly fascinating to me. Because some people, it's like uh slap slap. Some people are like slap fist bump, some people are like one fist bump, sometimes it's one, sometimes you don't know what to do because neither of you are coordinated enough in that moment to like jive together, and then you're like, my stars, I have no idea how this role's gonna go. But I tend to be a slap fist bump, and then if the other person is a slap slap, it makes it a turkey. And every time I either say turkey or I think turkey, and if I don't f say turkey, it's because I'm afraid the person's gonna think I'm a big dope. Sometimes I say it anyway, and they do think I'm a big dope, and sometimes I don't say anything, like and I just giggle, which makes me look even more like a dope. So, what is your signature start, respect you, whatever? Because does it say a lot about us? Maybe. Is it something other people think of? Probably not as much as I do. A huge shout out now goes to my friend Jane. Thank you so much, Jane, for being on the episode. After editing it, I love to get a chance to really think and process what she says, and she made it just sound so relatable and casual, and she really is doing remarkable things. I think sometimes we get this idea that commitment has to look a certain way, but I love that she has found the structure that works for her, both physically and mentally, it works for her relationship and finding balance. It sounded like she really has a good grip on everything. Loki, I'm a little jealous of trying to find balance in life, but I love that she realizes that for now this is working and she's willing to review and go over it in the future and see what works and tweak it. So I hope that you took a couple great glimmers away from my conversation with Jane. I hope you listen to the next one, share this with somebody, that would be really cool. Oh, reach out to me on Instagram or leave a message with this episode. That would be fantastic. So until next time, stay cozy and remember to do some breathing when you're rolling because I don't always