Emily's Pajama Party

EPP: Meet Daisy (All things IBJJF)

Emily Season 1 Episode 40

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In this interview, Daisy breaks down IBJJF from the inside — what makes it the gold standard of jiu-jitsu competition, how the registration and gi-check process works, and why the experience can feel both intimidating and deeply rewarding. She also shares what competing has taught her about problem-solving, resilience, and staying calm under pressure, alongside practical advice for anyone thinking about stepping onto the mats. Whether you’re curious about IBJJF or just want a real look at the mindset behind high-level competition, this conversation is full of insight, humor, and heart.

SPEAKER_02

Hi everyone, welcome to Emily's Pajama Party. My name is Emily, and I'm so glad you're here. This is my 40th episode. Woo-hoo! If you haven't heard me already, I've gotten a chance to talk to 40 different inspiring, amazing individuals in my hopes of making jujitsu accessible to all who want to try it. So sit back, get cozy, and let's jump in today's episode. This little fun fact of a way that I can be a better blue belt is an oldie but a goodie, but I love it. I need to remember that I need to try to stop collecting techniques. We live in such a world that YouTube and Instagram and TikTok, there's just so many online resources with the most fantastical, amazing, flashy techniques. That is not going to be my A game. I do not need to learn 37 different random submissions. Having a solid guard, a solid pass, one solid sweep chain, and one solid reliable submission is going to be a fantastic start to a strong game. I need to remember that depth is way more important than variety. And yes, there are different things I can utilize or pinpoint, but at this point in my game, I would rather spend more time to get really good at a couple things instead of stretching out my momentum and attention because there are so many extra details come along the way. I know as my game improves, I'll be able to introduce more things, but really I only have so much space for the little Rolodex in my head. And frankly, I need to work on that idea too, but I'm getting there. But I need to remember a good start is having a few solid go-tos. I'm thrilled, thrilled, thrilled to introduce you to my friend Daisy. If you've seen me on Instagram lately, we've hinted that we had our interview because no joke, I think this is our fourth time talking. So we're gonna like giggle about it at the beginning of the episode. And I want to let you all in on our little inside joke because gosh, the technical difficulties along the way. There was like internet things, and then the riverside the side I record through. I don't know how I glitched it, but I had messed up the timing. So I was asking the questions and she was like talking over me, even though that wasn't how the interview actually went. And then we tried to do an in-person and the topic didn't meld right. And I know this is just a funsy little pastime for me, a little side quest, but I really tried to do my best to give you the best. I used the best too many times. But really, really, I want it to turn out good. You guys are taking the time to listen, and the quality should be exceptional. You know, I'm not a professional, but I really have good high standards for myself. So Daisy, such a friend that she was a friend from the moment I sat down to talk to her, but honestly, getting to talk to her so many times and have her re-explain her story, this one feels the most solid and important in so many different ways. It kind of smooshed everything together. She is a very active competitor. And so we were talking the other day, and she's like, oh my gosh, I would love to have a YouTube or a something that talks about how to get into IBJJF because it seems like it seems it's very daunting for lots of folks. And I'm like, that's a great idea. Oh gosh, we should do that as your podcast. We're like, yes. We came up with these great questions. It is very IBJJF focused. If that's not your jam, we're totally fine. But it's kind of cool to hear about someone else's perspective and just kind of the little wiggle waggle path that she's found herself in and she really knows what she's talking about. So if you are a constant competitor, maybe you have more you can add, or you're she's gonna give you some really nice insights. If you haven't thought of that competition piece, maybe this is the nudge that's going to get you started. Also, if you were to reach out to her, I'm sure she would love to help you along the way. She's just that kind of person. She's just good folks. So sit back and listen to my story as I talk. Well, I guess it's her story. Listen to Daisy share her story. Welcome, Daisy. I'm so glad you're here. Welcome to the podcast.

SPEAKER_00

Thank you so much for having me on our fourth but yet amazing adventure.

SPEAKER_02

We're here, we're doing it. Okay, so for listeners who haven't met you before on the podcast officially, tell us a little bit about yourself, your jiu-jitsu journey, all of that.

SPEAKER_00

My name is Daisy Gonzalez. I'm a purple belt under Andre over at Carlson Gracie South Bay. I've been doing jujitsu for quite a while, but I think like everybody during COVID, it all got a little wishy-washy. I hope with Kids Jiu-Jitsu, it has been absolutely amazing. The babies are the sweetest little thing ever. I compete quite a bit. Currently, I'm ranked number two in my division for every GJF. I did Prestilettos, I did Master International, I've done quite some opens locally. And I would say I'm somebody who, you know, if you're around here and you are locals of the scene, you might have seen me. How many years have you been competing? To this degree, it's been a good three years. Nice. Yeah, of kind of back to back. I think last year I tallied and I believe I did 17 tournaments in 40 matches. Wow. Yeah, just last year alone. So I think I'm very close to 100 matches. We're gonna have to make you a little sign. 100th match. Oh, with a little cake. Actually, yeah, I'm gonna tell you that up, but I'm gonna find out like if I'm close to it or if I already had it.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, that would be really fun. I mean, that's definitely something to celebrate. Yeah. Okay, so what keeps you coming back to jujitsu after all those matches and all of those experiences and time at different gyms?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah. So I love problem solving. That's kind of like my fun. Like, even I bought this puzzle from Five Below for the plane for Brazil, thinking it would be like quick, easy, no problem puzzle. Still haven't sitting there just mocking me. I brought my dad. I was like, Dad, can you help me? He's like, What kind of demon puzzle did you buy? So it's just like who I've always been. Even my job, I work uh accounting and finance. And it's like, I've never been good at math. I've always been more of a partsy person, but it's the problem solving. So problem solving to me, it's that like endless pursuit of like there's no real end. I think when there's an end, it's easy to like, well, you know, this is the middle point, blah blah blah. So with when there is no end, I love that like endless chase.

SPEAKER_02

That feels like in one way the journey never ends, but also it feels like a quick way to burnout because what you have to measure success in different ways because you're not gonna just be at the top looking at the top of the bottom, like, I did it, I made it, because you look up and you're like, this is checkpoint one out of an infinite number.

SPEAKER_00

And then you get knocked on a few bags, you're like, Well, I just got tapped out by Steven, the local white bell.

SPEAKER_02

I'm just gonna go home now with no music and think about what I did in the car. Well, life choices have guarded me here. That's an interesting thing in a society where we often value quick success. We have Wi-Fi, if it takes longer than three seconds, we're like, absolutely not, we throw the computer. And so to see something where we have very little success rate comparatively to how many times we try and try and try and try to stick with something for so long and be excited about it.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think it says a lot about people's characters. I've seen it happen, I've seen it happen to where people are like, I'm not good at this, I don't want to try to be good at this, and they move on, and they might move on to try to be good at something else. Like, if you quit jujitsu or you don't want to continue jujitsu, it is nothing about like, oh, you don't test, you don't pass the test of time. It just means like that wasn't your test to take. So, you know, it's it's I've I've loved it because it's been very similar to my other things in my life that I've enjoyed, and but hilariously enough, I've never been good at sports, and surprisingly, I'm not athletic. It's the strangest thing. But you know, the friendships of people. I think um, you know, some people pick pickleball, some people pick chess. This is my millennial crisis.

SPEAKER_02

Now, as a child, were you like a poor sport? Because there's something to be said about I don't like losing. I'm never gonna do it. I played one season of basketball and I had no clue what I was doing. And I'm like, not for me, but soccer, I could just be like annoying enough and have high endurance and mostly get the ball because I just wouldn't give up. How are you? Do you see that? That you've always been willing to stick with it, or was that a skill that you had to build build over time? Like I know ego gets in the way of like, I should be better, I'm gonna go find something I'm better at.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, you know, I've always been bad at things. That's always been like in my favor of like being bad at things is my default state.

SPEAKER_02

You're like awful. Check me, sign me up for three years.

SPEAKER_00

So I can't you're not like I don't know how to swim, I don't know how to ride a bike. Like, literally, I can't even see properly. I have my contacts in literally not meant to survive very far. But I remember early on when I was trying to learn how to ride a bike, I was super scared of getting the training wheels taken off. But like my dad would try to let me go and I'd be like, please don't leave me, this is terrifying. And um, he was like, All right, fine, whatever. Like, and at that moment it taught me that like if you just say something is too hard, you can just quit. And I was like, all right, that seems easy enough. I was like, cool. So I never pursued any sports, I never pursued anything because I was like, oh well, if it gets too hard, I can just quit. But the first time that I noticed that you can push through and you can't come out the other end, and it was this very rewarding feeling was English is my second language. And uh early on I was told, hey kid, like your reading, absolutely terrible. And I was like, tell me something new. And so the my third grade teacher was the one that told me, look, if you want to catch up and be at the third grade reading level, I'm gonna need you to pick it up. Just read every if you if you can see a book and you can grab it, you should read it. And I was like, I can do that. Like it was an easy enough direction where I was like, okay, I'm I'm gonna do that. And so I did it, and sure enough, I caught up to my reading grade, and I was like, Oh, well, this is nice, but even then I was just catching up to like the you know the where I should be. So all of high school, I never really strived for anything because I always felt like I was catching up, and for the first time in my life, I felt like I was caught up, and then jujitsu came into my life, and I was like, I won one match at Jiu Jitsu World League, and I was like, this is my thing, I'm gonna do this forever. That's all it took. Like seeing victory and tasting to be like to go above and beyond when nobody asks, that it there is nothing like it for me.

SPEAKER_02

So yeah. I love that someone else can say the adage, like it's it's like riding a bike, you'll never forget, and you're like, oh no, not the bike again.

SPEAKER_00

We should go to like Cancun, we should go to Klamo. And she's like, Daisy, you can't swim. And I'm like, that shouldn't stop you.

SPEAKER_02

You're like, I'm just gonna find open mats to all of those places. You do you, but I'm gonna go indoors and wear 17 layers of clothes.

SPEAKER_00

I'm gonna put floaties and then I'm gonna tie myself to her and just be like, let's go, Bestie. You can do all sorts of things. Exactly. So I've always I've always been like, who cares if I can do this? Let's just do it. I love it.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so you're talking about competing and that first match. What do you remember from it? Do you remember the details? How did it feel the first time leading in? Were you like, yeah, I got this? Oh.

SPEAKER_00

No, it was it is terrifying then. It's terrifying now, it's always terrifying. I remember everybody around me believing I could do this, and me being like the only one who believed I couldn't, and we were terrified. I had already competed at blue again and had gotten wiped both my matches. So I was already like, man, like you know, this isn't for me, blah, blah, blah. We'll give it up to my best friend. She's always been my rock, who was like, you can do this. If you want to do this, you can do this. And she was always kind of like pushing me like that scene from cars, Liney McQueen, that's her. And because she truly believed in me, and it was I had this like spark of passion, like that's all I needed. Like, she ignited that flame. She was like, Go, all right, let's go. So I went, and you know, at the time I was with a team who is not known for having like the best competition team. So I was like, man, she's part of the I remember she was part of a big team. I was like, Oh man, she's part of a big team, like, I'm a nobody, like, this is gonna be terrible. And I was panicking, like, you could see it all on my face, like man. And so I didn't even really have like a stand-up place to be. I was just kind of like, oh man, I'm freaking out. And she lapel, like I still remember the match, it's so funny. She looked look trying to lapel drag me, but I it wasn't perfect, and I got a chance to kind of drive her forward, and I drove her forward, and I walked around her guard, and I was inside control, and I'm looking at the ref like, oh, um, okay, I'm doing well.

SPEAKER_02

All right, I'm gonna go. You had time to stop and look at the ref.

SPEAKER_00

I don't know why I looked at the ref like, are you going to stop this? What's going on? So I looked at the ref and I'm like, oh my goodness. And so my my coach at the time was just like more because I'm not you're gonna get a penalty, and I'm like, what's a penalty? So I'm like trying to put me on belly, and then the match ends, and and the ref raises my hand, and I'm like, Me?

SPEAKER_01

I won. I okay.

SPEAKER_00

And then I was on to the finals, and I was like, Why am I on to the finals? He was like, Cause you won. I'm like, Oh okay, this is very strange. Like, I'm in the winner's bracket of a thing. Wow. And the whole experience to me was so like eye-opening and so much emotion. I'm a very emotional person, I'm a very sensitive person. I I feel to like the 10th degree of always know like that. So imagine being a sensitive person and then feeling joy at the 10th degree like that. I didn't even get gold that time, I got silver, and I was like on cloud nine. I was like, this is amazing. This is my thing, I'm gonna do this forever.

SPEAKER_02

And you have, and I have, and I love that because it's one thing when the enthusiasm and emotions are fresh. You're like, this is great, I'm gonna do it every day. And then there's like a lull because there's there's a come down period because you can't ride that high forever, but you push through it. And let's see, when we talk you talked about your love of competition, what has come um what has competing taught you that regular training doesn't teach you?

SPEAKER_00

I think it really sees what you do on like high stakes, high pressure. This person is not your friend. I think in training, I know I have this all the time. We tend to go to our roles that we know, right? Like, I gotta get my X, Y, and D roll in, I gotta roll with so-and-so, I gotta roll with so-and-so. And for the most part, you can predict that role. Like, you're like, okay, he's gonna pull burnt, I'm gonna try to pass, but he's gonna get his knee back in, and then I'm gonna try a pressure pass this way, or I'm gonna pull, and then I'm gonna try to sweep up. And there's a lot of you know, lightness, and I feel like training should be light in that sense. But when you're competing, this person would rather give up their lunch money than lose to you. You would rather give up your lunch money than lose to them. So everything you do is sharp. And it also like kind of helps you look past the fog of you know the stress and the competing and be like, I have to focus. If not, I am going to lose. And that reaching that level of calmness and having that talk with yourself of like you have to focus right now. I understand you're worried, I understand your stress, I understand this girl is like grabbing you for you feel like for no reason, as if you didn't sign up to do this. And so you got you have to mentally push through that. And I don't think I've been put in scenarios where I had to do that safely, right? Because at any point, this gets too much, this gets she, oh man, I I don't pull well, she she smashes me, she's on top, and she tries to, you know, kimora me. Like I can tap and it's over. And so it's an extreme scenario that you can also get out of at the end of the day. I think those two things for me uh help me feel really safe while also exploring that side of myself.

SPEAKER_02

I think also with those competitions, because you only have a couple roles under that you know that you're dedicated, dedicated to that day, you put so much more energy in. I remember looking at the gals, I'm like, they're not so big, but they're so strong. And we know we don't want to be strong in jujitsu because you'd rather use technique. But like all bets are off when you step into that ring. They're using every muscle and every technique. It's not like just focus on technique right now. Mm-mm. They're gonna use everything is tense. We're all white knuckling.

SPEAKER_00

Everything is tense, and it's like, I'm not going down, you're going down, I'm not going down, you're going down. And then when you get out of bounds and you come back in, you guys are both looking at each other like, I'm coming for you, girl. And at the end, it's always so cute because it's like, oh my god, I must.

SPEAKER_02

You're like exchanging Instagram handles. You're like, look at when do you guys have open that?

SPEAKER_00

Are you in the area? You look back at your video of you competing with them, and it's like, boom, you move.

SPEAKER_02

And I know that's like the whole white belt blue butt mentality. Like, we could be so much cleaner, but now we're like, like, we don't want to like lose any sort of game. So everything is so tight. Like, if I would have chilled out a little bit, I would have been fine.

SPEAKER_00

But I also think it's like the limited, um, like I think I'm in the super heavy bracket, and I think we have a limited, for the most part, not everybody. There are super heavies out there that go guard, come up, and just send you flying. But for the most part, the super heavy bracket is like high school slogans, you know. I'm just kind of like, hey, which one of us is gonna trip the other one? So, you know, there's just limited things to do because of our weight class. Typically, if you're on bottom, you're typically gonna lose the match. Not always. So, and I think the same thing with white and bluebelt. The the level of techniques that you have in your arsenal is just not that wide. So you are fighting to death for this one pass that you know that you've drilled religiously. So I don't think it's like you guys wanting to be stiff, and I say you guys as if I wasn't a bluebelt this time last year. You bluebelts and white belts wanting to be stiff. I just think that you guys are focusing on what you know versus just hurricaning around the person.

SPEAKER_02

And what you know is like one thing out of 27. Like, if we could breathe just a second more, we'd have like four options. But like lizard brain takes over, so it's like half of one technique.

SPEAKER_00

Daisy, daisy, daisy, and I look over and he's like and I'm like, Yeah, no idea what he said.

SPEAKER_02

I've heard of ones where they're like under hook, underhook. They're like, I don't know what underhook is left and right, like use your left hand. Well, okay. My favorite is when you look over, don't like, don't look at me like you called my name. What did you expect me to do?

SPEAKER_01

I know, sorry.

SPEAKER_02

Mid-roll. Yeah. Oh my gosh. Okay. We know the intensity is so much higher when training. I mean, that's kind of a given, but you don't know till you know. And when you're really in there, then you're like, oh yeah, how high it's gone up. Do you think everyone should compete? Is this a jujitsu question? Should everyone compete once? Do you think this is a global thing? Everyone should compete once.

SPEAKER_00

I would say no. And the only reason why I would say no is because I'll take, for example, my best friend. You know, she is, I joke with her, she is the most capable competitor who doesn't want to compete. Like, I'm actually about to register her IBJ JF just so she can be a recognized black belt by the time she gets to black belt. And she loves jujutsu, she loves, she loves me, she loves everything around competing, like she knows the rules set, just just so when she goes, she's has like that knowledge base to help me out. Um, she loves training, she loves everything, she's super mentally capable of explaining things and executing them. It's beautiful to see her like absorb the technique and in in almost instantly be able to spit it out. But she has zero interest in competing. She goes, not my job. And I I think that's fair because we're all doing this for podcasts. Very few of us are like, even if we were like sponsored, like big sponsored, you know, where they're paying us to go out there and compete. If we wanted to tell our sponsor, hey, I'm dead, man. I'm good. Like, that's fair. We, you know, I have a day job, you have a job, you have kids, everybody has stuff going on that fulfills them much more. Like competing is just what fulfills me. At this time, there might come a time where it's not what fulfills me, and you know, that's perfectly fine. But I think if you have no interest and you put yourself out there and it becomes this horrific experience for you, it might go as far as tr uh tainting. Your love for jujitsu altogether. And I think that is much more worse than the joy of competing.

unknown

Hmm.

SPEAKER_02

I I've heard hot take. Everyone should try it once so they know what it feels like to be in there. But you're right. Like everyone, I hear most people say, I'm afraid to compete because I don't want to get injured. And they're like, oh, just pull guard, you're fine. There's always freak things, like my weird toe thing. I didn't expect that. It wasn't that crazy, just a freak accident. And you would hate for something in that. What are the chances? Well, the chances would then be, and that could ruin your joy of the sport or whatever. So that's fair. I think there's a lot to learn, but not everybody needs that in their life to learn those lessons.

SPEAKER_00

And it's such a big commitment, both mentally, spiritually, and financially that I think it should come from you. I think if you can easily be swayed, you should also do it. But um, if you're, you know, if you're somebody like my best friend who's just like, absolutely not, you know, and she would do great. I just know she would do great. But she's like, no, absolutely not. Totally does not bring even an ounce of joy for me. She also likes to joke, the more I watch you do it, the less I want to do. Poor thing gets all the um adrenaline and none of the release. So I like after consistently speaking with her, uh, I've totally come to that conclusion that if you don't want to, why in the world should you have to? You know, you're an adult, you're entitled to your decision, especially if it's your time and your money and your effort. Totally be your choice.

unknown

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02

So we're on here today because we were talking about all of your love and competing. And we talked about there can be very specific rules for each organization. There's some small ones. We all have like in-house tournaments, we have ones that are done in the city. It can go back to it can go all the way up to like ABCC and all these giant ones that we're seeing all over the place. IBJJF is a huge name and really all it's international, you've been all over the world with it. But it can be a little intimidating. Starting just from the very beginning, someone that might not be familiar with jujitsu, what would how would you say? I don't know anything about IBJ JF. Tell me about it, Daisy.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, if I had to kind of present to CIMB at first go, which I actually have presented it to people who are like, hey, I want to compete. There's all these organizations, which one should I do? I always kind of say, you know, if you want to go to, you know, Harvard, you know, IBJ JF is the Harvard per se of the competitions. It's just there's an eliteness to it, uh, it's tied to a lot of formality. It's been the one that has the longest standing. It kind of has more of the well-known rules, like other organizations take their rule set and go, oh, we're playing by IBJF rules. Everybody kind of knows what that means. It's also the yellow and blue mats. Everybody knows what the yellow and blue mats look like. There is this formality and this magnitude to it that is tied. So if you tell people, hey, I competed at IBGJF World, they know exactly what you're talking about for the most part, if they know about competition and stuff. So it is just the top tier of competing, in my opinion. And I think in most people's opinion, it is the gold standard.

SPEAKER_02

So why aren't more people competing in IBJF or are okay, it goes both ways. I'm because of that status, lots of people do it, but also a lot of people like, oh, there could be a lot of not red tapes, but a little tricky of a journey to get in there, and it can be a little intimidating. If I wanted to do an in-house tournament, I would like tell my professor, hey, put me in for Saturday. I would like to. And he's like, Yes. Or the ones that are local, like we had at like an Anaheim Convention Center, or like that's at a local university. Some of these ones you can sign up, you know, right before, yeah, which is totally fine too. I'm not saying that for all tournaments, but really there's the ground of grassroots all the way up to the more complicated ones. So what tournaments do do they run?

SPEAKER_00

So they run quite a bit of the local opens around here. We have Orange County Open, we'll have LA Open. LA Open is actually coming up in July. July 11th, if I'm not mistaken. And open just means anyone can be in it. Yes, of course, you have to go through the registration. So that that part I'll get into later. It's a little, you kind of have to know your ins and outs. But yes, the opens for the most part, any anybody can go into. But even the larger one, like Master International, that just happened on a Wednesday. Also, anybody can get into. There's no big roadblocks outside of the registration formality. So, you know, they run Master International just happened, uh Master Worlds, which is coming up in August, which is kind of the Super Bowl of all these opens. And so they also run brasileiros, pans, euros, kind of those big ones that you see everywhere. And that for the most part, winning those tournaments can get you quite a bit of notoriety. Again, this is all in my opinion. I don't have I've done any BJJF, I've done Jiu Jitsu World, like they're wonderful tournaments, they're great tournaments. I just think that I guess my only thing is I the few reasons why I see people not competing at a BJJF is because they think it's too big, too elite. I'm not allowed to sign up. Like they actually think they're not allowed to sign up. And I I I want to wipe that because for the most part, the people that are doing jujitsu worlding and NIBJF are also doing um the local tournaments and stuff like that. So it's like, why not? You're already gonna test yourself against these people. Why not test yourself against these people with a little bit more prestige behind it, a little bit more formality? Uh also, you know, when you go to you know, in a bigger event like Master Worlds, it's people from all around the world. Like recently I just had a match with somebody from Australia. Like, I I think that is amazing. But you know, that's also because I I think it's amazing. There's some people that come up to me and they're like, Man, Daisy, what are you talking about? IBGJF is like the worst, this, that, and the third, and I'm like, super valid. You go on and you do that, bro. But I just want to wipe away the people that think it's not for them and they wish it was because it totally is for them. If you are competing and you're doing well at Jiu Jitsu World League and NIBGJF, there is no reason why you're not gonna do well at IBGJF.

SPEAKER_02

So, what does the process look like for registering for IBJJF? Because it it's not something sign up on a Friday and compete on a Saturday. Yes.

SPEAKER_00

For sure. So you have to get your IBJF registration, which is right now, if I'm not mistaken, $45 for the year. And what you need for that registration is a passport style photo uh that you can take on their app or you can submit your professor to approve your rank, and that is the only kind of big roadblock, in my opinion, is if your professor is not recognized by IBGJF as a black belt, and I believe it has to be all the way up to their third degree, they cannot register you. So if you're unsure if your professor is registered, have that conversation with him. Because even if he's not registered, he can find someone to assist you. You might have to go under a different academy. But for the most part, they have friends that are like, Yeah, don't worry, you know, I'll I'll uh register your student.

SPEAKER_02

That happened to me where I was trying to register, but our head instructor had left, but it was still recognized in the system that it was him. And so they were trying to like email him or whatever they do. And they're like, sorry, he never got back to us. I'm like, I don't know what to tell you because that's the guy. And so it just that became my little circle of confusion that just like forget this. We'll go to another one. I was a white belt at the time, and I'm like, yeah, because I'm faking my I guess there are people that either sandbag or have never done the sport at all and are just trying to jump into it. I could see either side.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I have, yeah, I like the confirmation of the registration, not only because you are you have to meet the minimum requirements for X, Y, and Z belt, and people I think people see that and go, why? And I I will tell you exactly why. I was at a tournament, I'm not gonna say the organization, and a white belt signed up to compete in the purple belt division because he felt he was a purple belt. I'm like, okay, and that that just wouldn't have happened at um Ivy Jack, it just wouldn't have like a big thing.

SPEAKER_02

I'm assuming he got smoked, like they didn't let it happen.

SPEAKER_00

Oh because he so he came with his white belt and they asked the guys, are you guys okay with this? And they were like, Yeah, weird, but sure. And they were like, Okay, well, one of you guys have to give him your purple belt because it can't look like strange. I know there's some organizations that let you compete against different belts. So I I don't think it's completely unheard of, but I think there's like a process to it. I don't think that I feel like I'm a purple belt, so I'm gonna go sign up as a purple belt is how it's done. And it's like those things that are kind of odd and strange are completely annihilated at something as top tier as I so if your professor is not recognized for whatever reason, right? Like um, I think even my professor said he he waited some time to register one of his stripes. Just there is so much paperwork and stuff that it can get lost. And so he approves your rank, he approves who you are, that you're part of a team. You have to submit your driver's license. Like it is very much like you need to be who you say you are. Um, and I think that's great too because I mean, I think other organizations follow that format a little bit, but there is like a big formality with it. So my professor approved my registration the next day. Like it they're, I believe on their side, it's just you log in, you approve, you move on. There, and that's kind of it. But in in the case where you can't get a whole day of your professor, they don't log in, whatever, then you have to like print out, print it out, and take it to them, they have to sign it, it's this whole thing. So that's why I would have the conversation with your professor beforehand to avoid it getting delayed. Because once it gets delayed, then the process be can become like a hamster wheel. So have the conversation, get as much information as you can by them before you actually do the paperwork and then it's pending. I think that's the cleaner way to do it.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, well, and then you talk about later on down the road when you're talking about points or scoring or things like that, we want to make sure they're going to the right people. And so it makes sense that they would have to, like I look at it from a running perspective. If I sign up for half marathon for a marathon, I need to prove, you know, you sign in and you do all the stuff, but you hear about bandit runners or you hear people that race under somebody else's bib, and then it might not necessarily mean they win the race, but they're taking away that spot from somebody else. And so when you're looking in the grand scheme of things, someone else could have been that higher ranking or whatever. Because if I am borrowing the bib of my friend who's sick and she's a 45-year-old, but I'm 22 and a male, I'm going to be running a hell of a lot faster than someone that not necessarily, but for this case, they're going to be at different stages of life. It could be a very big discrepancy in what the person would typically run.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, no, I would like to make sure that the person who I signed up to be the same bracketing is who is signed up for the same bracket. So I don't I get the reasoning behind this formality when I first signed up. I honestly didn't even think about it. I was kind of signing up for all the tournaments, and I was like, okay, this is just its process, but also because I work in finance forums, I'm kind of used to it. I'm like, of course, we have to fill out a form, of course.

SPEAKER_02

It's so funny. There's always a forum for that. Okay, so some people just the getting into it and signing up can be the tricky part. And it's like, but wait, there's more because you're looking at your ghee, and now does IBJF does both gi and no gi? Yes.

SPEAKER_00

Nogi tends to be like if their tournament is Saturday and Sunday, they tend to do tend to do Nogi Sunday. I say this and they're gonna run it on Saturday now. And also they'll have like Nogi Worlds, like Nogi World is its own shebang, its own show, same thing as Nogi Pans. It's its own like event. There's absolutely no gi involved. Uh same thing with the Gee Worlds and all the Gee events, it's just the Gee events. Uh minus like Amer uh Master Worlds that's coming up. Master Worlds that's coming up is for anybody over 30. Each, I believe it's 30 to 36 is considered master one, and then their 40 is considered master two, and so on and so on. Then they have something for the adults, which is 18 to 29, which is called jujitsu con. So the adults can sign up for jujitsu con and then they have kids jujitsu con as well, and the nogi adults can also sign up for jujitsu con. They have like a nogi thing for jujitsu con. So it it is a whole like that event is a whole whirlwind of stuff.

SPEAKER_02

We need to like one of those crime docs where they have like the big whiteboard with all the strings and all the messages, and we're like, well, connect these two, but also here, and then have this as your glossary for all the language because you're like, add the word pans in there because yeah, and like you can go any day, like the event is over three days, you can be anywhere at least three days.

SPEAKER_00

I think like every organization, IBGJF has its thing that it's been criticized for. One thing is that, like, you know, you'll sign up for a tournament and it'll say you can literally go any day. And you're like, well, that's helpful, that helps me narrow it down. You know, I will say If does not go without fault, but I just think that the recognition you get from doing such a high-level event is completely worth it, in my opinion. I know there's a lot of people that don't feel that way, and I think that's valid. I think that if you want to bring change to the organization and you want to do that by not competing, that's fair. I just I feel like it's like McDonald's in a way, where people are like, oh, I could never, I never eat McDonald's, I would never compete every DJF. Everybody shows up. It's like these packed events. I'm like, okay.

SPEAKER_02

It kind of reminds me, I'd taken my son and his friend a couple years ago on his birthday to Disneyland. It was just these two boys, and I'm like, do we want to buy souvenirs or do we want the genie pass? And they're like, well, you pick one because we all picked the poise and picked the one that works best for us. So we picked souvenirs, which they like touched once, but I'm just like gonna twitch a little bit. At least it didn't pay for both, but another story. Then we were and then Star Wars day Star Wars Land is there, and Rise of the Resistance had just reopened because if a hat falls, like the whole ride shuts down for four hours. So the line was gonna be like an hour and a half. And we weren't really waiting on many lines, it were like in many lines. I told the boys, I'm like, look, it's gonna be an awesome ride, but we know what the wait is gonna be. Yes, and we can do it if we all agree, we understand what we're getting ourselves into and no one's complaining because it's not gonna be our favorite. There's gonna be moments where we're in direct sun, it's not gonna be, it's gonna be warm, it's not always gonna be terrible, and but we can make the best of it while we're there. I feel like sometimes we have to be set ourselves up for success with realistic expectations because if I think I'm gonna have a tight little schedule and easy breezy parking and not step on any fingernails that are on the ground from like other competition, you know what I mean? Like I really have to know it could be three, 14-hour days. It could be hurry up and wait, and then jumping in last minute. And if I'm okay with all of that, I'm gonna go in with a good attitude and it's gonna be fine. And I'm probably gonna have a better experience than what the alternative could be.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and I think the biggest thing is being informed. Like if I hand you over all the information and you go, that sounds terrible. I'm not gonna do it, I think that's fair. There's some people that I've given the information to and they're like, Oh, that's not so bad. I'm gonna sign up. I'm like, wonderful. And I think that feels like my purpose at time is just to have, and especially with the women. I feel like women always just want to know what they're getting into, what the blueprint is gonna look like. Because if we don't know, we can't plan, and if we can't plan, it's not happening.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so bringing it back to what the jujitsu ghe thing. I I last time I brought two gis because I was very anxious that one wasn't going to be right. What does it mean when you look at a gi for checking in? What are they going to expect? And what's gonna get you kicked out of there?

SPEAKER_00

Not kicked out, but yeah, so DQ. The one the ref just looks at you. No, you're done. So I don't want to talk about the numbers exactly because they change it, and so I don't want people to reference this like a year later. They're like, oh, that's the measurement. So jujitsu uh IBGIF has the uh the requirements online, but my professor has the ghee checker, like the same ones that the uh ghee checkers actually use, and so you know it checks because they just want to make sure that the sleeve all has the same level of fairness so that the grips are roughly the same. Same thing with the pants, it has to be a certain width, it can't be too short, you can't go in there with caprice, so and then the color, it can only be black, blue, or white for Avija. There cannot be any hot pink, neon blue. I know it looks cool, but they don't allow it. Patches, patches have to be very well sewn on. Like you can't have a patch that's like a borderline about to come off. Same thing with the heat press. I have all my ghs are heat pressed with my team logos and stuff. It cannot be like half coming out, they have to be very well maintained ghese for the safety of the athletes. It's not just because they want to be, you know, difficult. It's for the safety of the athletes and for the fairness of the game. So if your your patches have to be on well, um, there's certain places you can't have patches. That one I don't know why, but there's certain areas that can't be patched, but it's all very well laid out on the website. And if you just take like five minutes to look at the website, you'll be able to get a really good gauge if your ghee is gonna pass or not. But I think my cheat code that I've always used when I'm buying a new ghee, there's two things I look for. If on the website it'll say IBJ approved or not, like a lot of ghee brands understand that people compete this organization and that it typically is the standard that other organizations use. So they'll put on there IBJF approved or not. And then another thing that I do is I'll go to the last open that happened or the last tournament or whatever, and I'll see what ghees people are wearing. And I'll be like, okay, the king's the one definitely passes the inspection because there's 20 of them. So that's um another thing that I that I kind of do to quickly double check. There is something that they just came out with last year, and that is why I'm so like particular about like you have to be current with whatever Abby Jack is saying. They had a seam issue, which I think affected a lot of the Gracie Baja gis. And so a lot of people had to like undo the seams of the Gracie Bajas, uh stitch it back up, and kind of like re uh redo it. So definitely the seam issue affected quite a bit of ghis, but for the most part, not every single one because that a lot of the ghys that I used to be still perfectly fine.

SPEAKER_02

Now, if you show up and you go to like check in and you're like you show it to them, will you find out there or is this something that's going to end up like on the mat? Like, is there any do they sell like comp legal ones for $5,000? Because I feel like that's the other thing. They're like, well, we have some over here.

SPEAKER_00

Conveniently enough, we have so I always bring I want to I want to say one because I want to say I want to sell normal two spare keys. Because one time I had my water bottle burst in my bag and damp my backup ghee. So now I bring a third one in the car. Fair. So I bring a total of 30s. One ghee that I'm just like, this is gonna pass no matter what, noy offens are bads. One ghee that I have to kind of like, you know, shiny my shoulders a little bit on and think small thoughts. Um and then like a like another ghee that I'm like, I'm pretty sure this will pass. So that you're not caught up with that whole, and sometimes if if it's the first time I bring a ghee to compete, I'll ask the ghe checkers. I think they hate me for this, but I'll be like, can you just quickly please check my ghee? I just want to make sure I don't want to like run out there in a panic and like waste all, like have that be my warm-up, is like mad jog to your car, get that new ghee, come back. Um, so if you have your backup geese, and sometimes honestly, I've seen ghys rip in the middle of a match. Yeah, and um somebody from your team will toss you a ghee and go, I need pants!

SPEAKER_02

Give me their pants, like pants ripped.

SPEAKER_00

Yes. Um, I've also seen people way more than I like, pass inspection, absolutely no problem, get to their match, bump slap, get ready to compete, battle, and then they just pull out the ghee checker and reject. The pants, and it's like you want to laugh and you want to be like, Why is this happening right now? But it is the ref job to make sure that the match is fair, consistent, and equal. And if they feel like somewhere between the bullpen and this match, you changed your pants. I it's hard for me to get upset at them at trying to keep it because you there's some time between the bullpen and you actually getting on there where you could have totally changed your pants. Weird. Very weird. How did you do that? It's very strange. Did you hide behind a few people? But alright. But also like tops are easy to interchange out. Yeah, why not have to wear rash cards? You can wear a sports bra. I like to go tank top because you know, I think after a certain cup size, bra sports bras are not gonna do it for you. So I'll do a sports bra and a tank top. Just because the I don't know about you, but the the rash card, like even the women's cut, I'm like, why is this why is my rash guard choking me? What's going on? And so I know I have to like thug it out for trading, but at competition, I do not want to thug it out. Like I'm already thugging out life in the competition for the love of God. Let me put on a tank top. So you can do sports bra, tank top, or a rash card, but you do have to have like some kind of coverage on the men, no rash card, no nothing. Just out there. You're not allowed to have a rash card? No, you're not allowed to have a rash card, absolutely no rash card. Yeah, so there are those um rules, and for and for ghee, you have to have a rash card that's at least 10% of your belt rank. The ghee, the no gi the no-gi day check stuff is way more chill. I'm just kind of like, yeah, that's 10%. No, yeah, that's 10%. It's not a lot. No, it's not. That's funny. Yeah, it's like just the sleeves. So yeah, there is rules and requirements, but like everything, there's rules and requirements for even the local tournaments. Sure. The first time I competed in BGJF, and this might not be the rule anymore, I haven't kept up because I don't really compete any BJJF anymore. You had to have a rash guard on as a woman. Like no matter what. And I remember thinking, like, wow, I'm so happy I read that because I was gonna show up in a tank top. So you um I was like, all right, fair enough. Uh so yeah, you every organization that you compete, even though Apicet is the standard, you should 100% day before look at it. It's like everything that you do, right? There's gonna be rules, there's gonna be things you can do, you know. Your nails have to be trimmed. I get gel to keep my nails strong, I try, I really do. And I'll cut them the day before competition, and I just sit there and cry and just go, it's okay, it's walking. I hope I get cold. Yeah, so there is uh oh, weirdly enough, I say this because it is I've seen it happen. If you get makeup or hair dye on your opponent's key, they can stop the match and DQ you. Yeah, which I think is fair. Do not stand another person's probably very expensive geek. So I tend to put hair dye in my hair if I have to do it before a competition, which I try not to, a week out so that all the dye is completely out before I go and I can be out. Yeah.

unknown

Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_02

Okay, so we got you signed up, we got you checked in, we checked your gi, your rash set, no gi, you're set to get in the match. I don't know if it's oh, real quick, belts.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, I believe it is 12 inches. There is uh, and again, I say 12 inches now, next year they're gonna move it up to 20. But as of right now, I believe it's 12 inches past the uh like once you tie it, like should be out, as well as it can't be too raggedy, like you can't use your beat-up like 12-year-old purple belts to compete. It has to be a nice and neat kept belt. Same thing with your ghee. Your ghee even though it can pass all the all the patch check, all the stuff, it can't be like, you know, raggedy looking.

SPEAKER_02

How funny. They're like, we want to compete, but also look good as you're doing it. Yeah, I'm sure there's more to that, but here we are. Okay, again, so we're checked in, we registered, we checked in, our outfit passes, fit the pass pass. Fit check. What are the most important scoring rules for new competitors?

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I think um uh when I was getting used to the rules, the best way that somebody put it to me was that the only weird one is a pass. Because a pass is three, be on belly is two, a takedown is two, a sweep is two, and then two for the sweep and three for the pass. That's how I remember it. And then a back take and amount is four. So the only weird one is the pass. That one is three for some forsaken reason. But um I think uh the two big things that I see people kind of go, what? That's a rule, huh? What? Is that if you were both standing up and the match has started and you're gonna pull a guard, I come in, touch your foot either with my hand or with my other foot or whatever, boom boom two. Right. Like even if you're pulling guard, if there's a little bit of a touch, boom two. And another one is a reversal does not come for any point. So if I'm on bottom and you're on top, and I'm bridging and I'm bridging, and I bridge enough to get you over, and now we've reversed, no points happen for it because there was no established guard to have a sweep, so it was just a reversal, so there's no points. Also, if you know I'm in the middle of a sweep and I think I'm gonna get it, and like I have your pants or something, and I come up and we're standing up for three seconds, and at about the second second, I push you down, there's no points there. Because we were not standing for three seconds to consider it a stand-up engagement, and we're back down. Now I say these rules six months later down the line they could change them. My professor is always keeping up with the new changes and the new regulations because they're always adding because the sport is always changing, right? So they're always, you know, adding new things, taking away old things that don't make any more sense, and so you have to keep up with the rule set. And if you're like my division is pretty standard in the sense that like I don't have to remember that like you can only do knee bars at brown belts because nobody in the super heavy division is knee barring nobody. Um, so my like the biggest thing I have to remember in my division is how quickly they will give you a penalty for strolling. So if I'm which is the most noticeable in side control, if I have you on bottom and I'm on side control and it does not look like I am trying to advance either with the submission or trying to advance the position, 20 seconds in, and usually the ref will kind of look at his watch and that tells you, hey girl, girly pop, what are we doing here? And so it does this, and I know I have 20 seconds to make an attempt. It doesn't mean I have to commit to that attempt, it just has to mean that I'm actively looking to uh pick up the pace in the map.

SPEAKER_02

No flying squirrel and just like lay there for the next five minutes.

SPEAKER_00

In mounts, you can't. So mounts and back is the only positions you can just hang out, do your taxes out to your grocery list, whatever. But inside control, and it's a little bit weirder when it's in the guard because if the guard if you're closing the guard, you get a penalty because you're staying closed. Once the guard opens, and the person on top is not making an actual effort to pass, then they can get a penalty. So there's a lot of little caveats, and it's a lot of what is the ref seeing. There's a lot of it's open transpretation for sure. But inside control, it's very obvious. The person on the side control is not advancing the penalty. Penalty.

SPEAKER_01

After a certain amount of penalties, you go home. DQ, up, fix your geese, DQ, DQ, good day, ladies. If you get disqualified, the other person wins.

SPEAKER_00

Neither one of them win. So this gets interesting in the bracket breakdown because I've in the past thought that like you don't make you don't get to do the podium, but you do get to do the podium if it's like four people, like there's so many variables for that. It's like, are you in a qualifier match? If you're in a qualified advance, you guys both just don't get bats. And so it gets really interesting when two people get DP DQ'd because the whole kind of narrative of the competition changes. Also, like let's say you and I signed up for a competition, and your side of the bracket, nobody showed up, but everybody on my side of the bracket showed up. I could have three matches to justify you, and that could be your first and only match. And it's I've seen it happen. I've seen so many things where I'm like, huh, no way.

SPEAKER_02

It's hard not to stomp your feet and say, no fair, but it's only consolations knowing that it was just kind of dumb luck that people ended up the way they did.

SPEAKER_00

Yep. And it's also kind of this thing where like I feel like I've been on the other side of it and I've lost that last match, and I'm like, oh my god, sure. Um, so it's yeah, it's it's very I find all that stuff interesting because I love problem solving and like, oh, this is different. And what about this variable and that variable? So I think it's a lot of fun.

SPEAKER_02

And remember I have to remind myself I'm not a professional athlete, and so it's not like I'm going to be making $5,000 off this match or whatever the case is. So you are definitely losing money. And sometimes a lot of time standing around for three days waiting for my one match, then uh.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and then another three hours if you want to do the open class.

SPEAKER_02

You called stop and you said a word. Like, what are some of the phrases that you're gonna hear? Like when you walk into the ring, you're gonna bow, you're gonna not bow, you're allowed to talk to people, you can check in with your coach.

SPEAKER_00

Yes, that's a big one. So you are not allowed to talk to the rest. And I can always tell somebody's gonna be my friend when they go, What if I have questions? And I'm like, no, baby, you cannot.

SPEAKER_02

I'm like, I'm a yapper. Can I just ask him how he's doing? No. Oh man, there goes my one match after three days.

SPEAKER_00

I had recently at Master International, I had to tie my belt, like, because you so if you're both wearing the same colored geek, I forget how it works out, but one of you guys has to wear what my friend calls the pineapple belt, which is the green and yellow belt. And so I have to put it on. And as a super heavy, it's always either absolutely too big where I'm wrapping it like two, three times, or it's absolutely too small, where I'm just like, oh, this dainty little shoelace. What am I gonna do with this? And so I'm putting it on, and the the ref comes over to me, he's like, You need to tie it a little tighter because if not, it's fall, it's gonna fall off. And I'm like, That's the point, professor. The point of it is for this extra belt to fall off. And he looks at me like, and I was like, Well, we weren't on the man, he can't he cue me just yet. But he looked at me like you know better than to talk to me. I was like, nervous I was. But you are not allowed to talk to the ref at all once the match is started. You are allowed to talk to your professor. I think the most I've ever said to a ref in all my years of competing was my ghee is stuck, and that's because I wasn't sure if he could see it or not. And so he goes, No, I know, I'm I'm trying to fix it. I'm like, okay. And that's about the most I've ever said to him. But you can talk to your professor, and it's your professor's job also to advocate for you. Because if you know a point was supposed to be given to you, but they didn't because they're humans and they make mistakes like everybody else, then he's supposed to advocate for you. They're supposed to bring it in to the table because there's like a main table that reviews stuff, because obviously the ref can't go back and check. So they'll call it in, the table will review it, and if they agree or disagree, that will dictate if they do or not give you those points. So all those things, and if you talk to the ref, you you get a penalty. Like if he feels like we we're actually having a conversation, this is not how this is gonna go, you get a penalty. And I also really love that so in uh IBJF particularly, if we are tied up zero zero, the ref gets to make the decision on who he felt was being more active, being more of the pace picker up, and like just had a better fight. About two years ago, I did American Nationals Nogie, and I had like the worst experience with this one girl where we went zero zero. I guess she was some big name in the whole scheme of stuff, and uh they raised my hand, and I was like, oh my god, I'm going on to the finals at uh American Nationals in the open class. My goodness, this is amazing. But I was like in a complete daze because that match had been pretty aggressive, and like I've always seen matches uh as matches, not fights, hot take, I think. But to me, it's a match, right? Because like a fight, there's a lot of things, a lot of variables. There's not a lot of variables in a match. So, but it really felt like she was in a fight with me. Jesus, so it was a lot like I had to come off of that aggressioness because at the time it was easy for me to be like it wasn't personal, it was just a match, like calm down, calm down. And she ended up like losing her marbles, like she like was talking to the ref, you know, yelling, you didn't win that match, blah blah blah. Like it was this whole thing. She got her photographer involved. It was really like ghetto. I was like, Madame, calm down. And the ref goes up to her and goes, because she's telling the ref, like, what are you what did you see that she did? Like, did the arm drag not count? Like, she's like going off on the ref. And the ref tells her, It is not my fault that you didn't do anything.

SPEAKER_02

And I was like, opening hello, professor. Like, I don't know if I'm supposed to be hearing this, but I'm gonna bring my popcorn bucket and just post it right here.

SPEAKER_00

And I was like, that is a ref who has seen it and heard it all and was like, not today, little missy. And I just love that. I was like, that's like one of my core memories of the ref, is like the ref shutting down the conversation and being like, we are not doing this today. And I think you see that a lot in the IBJF refs that you don't see in some of the other organization refs is that they are so used to handling these like high pressure situations that they step in when they need to and just not today. Uh-uh. And they come in with sex.

SPEAKER_02

Well, it's nice to see. Well, at the end of the day, you hope there's a neutrality. You hope that everybody is getting the same. You hope because there are so many rules that everyone's treated the same. We know that the world is a very subjective place, and there's going to be all sorts of instances, and there will be mistakes made, and we are all human and we are all showing up the best as our capability. Nobody's going in there. You hope to call something wrong. It's hard not to remember the times where things did not go in our favor.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and I've had I've had moments where I'm like, I won that match, but you you move on with your day. You have to, right? Like I me sitting here and pouting and kicking my feet and going, Well, I won that match is like, well, did you? Like, it was left to a very subjective point. So I mean you didn't win it like in some, you know, huge flip-down type of thing. So I think the way because in other organizations, when it's not a rough decision, they go into overtime. And overtime would just be so exhausting because you're talking about like I've seen people go 30 minutes, and then if you have another match after that, that's so draining. So I I hear a lot of people give grievances about rough decisions in general as as like a part of the rule set. But as someone who's seen overtime, I'm like, I don't know if that's better, you know, because you're depleting your athletes, both athletes, and now, like, you know, how many matches are not gonna be able to advance on this map because we have a 30-minute sprawl out by like two athletes, so two 37-year-olds think of soccer games.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I refuse to go another. Right. That too. This is their moment. Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_00

And you keep going back. Yes. I think once you've done one, at least for me, it's very easy to be like, let's do another one. And where we live, there's just so many. That again, you can do 17 tournaments and boarding matches. Right. I think a thing that gets overlooked for IBGJF is that you have the ability to sign up for the open class. And I think it's a super heavy for the longest time I felt like the open class wasn't meant for me. Like the open class is meant for the smaller athletes to shine against the bigger athletes, and it's not for you to win. And um, I just completely like threw away that that uh that conversation because I was like, look, I have to get my reps in. And these smaller girls are quick, and they are I mean, when they move, I'm like, please stop moving them. Like, you don't understand, and it's like there is nothing else like experiencing uh medium heavy who's like strong and fast and is just running circles around and you're like, Oh, I don't know what to do, and the way that they get their legs back in, it's like you don't experience that in the super heavy division. So it is uh amazing to kind of use all of your assets against such a good athlete. And even when I am doing the open class, like I'm not thinking like, oh, I just gotta smash this tiny person. Like, I'm thinking I want to get to my double unders as quickly as I can and uh start to collapse their head. Like, I'm not thinking like just smash, even though my professor is definitely yelling, just smash.

SPEAKER_02

Well, I heard it said was it Erin Quillin, Brutal Viking, when she was on. She's like, we don't tell really flexible people not to use their flexibility. We don't ask the quick people to slow down. Yes. This is a piece of who we are, and our game is going to be shaped by how we are shaped. I mean, it doesn't necessarily confine us to just one style, but there are going to be things that lend and it's like we all are different, are we in some of our parts, use all of our parts in whatever way we can.

SPEAKER_00

I think my friend Ariel, who's like the open class go, said it to me the best one time where she said, Why would you sign up for the open class if you know the super heavies in there? And I was like, Yeah, why would they come to our side of the playground? And I thought that was a great perspective of instead of looking at it as you can't sign up, it's like there they have a choice and you have a choice. Yeah. And your choice should just be whatever makes you happy. Sure. And um, I recently had like a not so good time in the open class. One of the girls asked me what I weighed, and I'm like, girl, like this is the open class, like you know what you signed up for. And I was like, yeah, this is weird, and it was like a moment where I thought, like, see, the open class is in for me. Then I thought about like, look, IBSHF is not cheap. It's not cheap, and I think I'm worth it. And I signed up for my division, and as I've gotten up the ranks, it's some less people because just less people standard too. And so sometimes I can't get my matches in my bracket. I'm not going to not get my reps in and not compete because nobody signed up for my bracket. And what would people say? Like, you know, I know people sometimes is the open because it's a girl. If it was easy, I would be getting gold all the time. I am not getting gold all the time. These girls are hard. And if you think it's that easy, she's like right, and you're right.

SPEAKER_02

I think we all agree to it, and you don't get to agree and take back because it's not your ideal situation. But frankly, it could be an idea, an ideal for everybody involved. You never know what the other person is coming in.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, I mean, these girls are coming in really strong, really fast, really athletic. And I'm here for it. I'm like, yeah, like I love, I love me a strong girly pop is gonna throw me around.

SPEAKER_02

Have you ever thought about like, ooh, I could cut, oh, I could do this, I could do that? Because I feel like I grew up at like in the 90s in high school, and I remember the wrestlers and like the crazy things they would do to cut weight. And I still know people are doing crazy things to cut weight, but I think they've gotten a little bit smarter, but not really that much, because at the end of the day, people are still doing some pretty different things. Yeah, and really I heard um again if you talk, she's like, if you were just wrestle with the grapple with what your natural weight is, like, why would you put that much more stress on your body? But everybody has reasons for what they do. So I can't make the decisions for people. Yeah, I can only do what's best for me. And I'm I'm a witch when I'm when I'm like I was trying to think of like what's the most polite way to do things I am for it. I am a monster when I'm cutting or if I'm in a calorie deprivation situation because I want to like lose fat or whatever, I'm a monster for two weeks. I'm irritable, I yell at everyone, I'm snappy. It doesn't do anyone a good thing to be around me.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, no, I think the long term goal is to get me in a smaller bracket for multiple reasons, both because there's just more matches. Uh Like, for example, heavyweight. And there's just uh more things my body will be able to do. Like, I'm not oblivious to the fact that me being overweight is not helping my jujitsu. Um, so me and um my professor and a few people on our team are all making an effort to kind of get me on the right weightlifting path, and obviously my eating habits and these things that are just like preventing my jujitsu from being like what I know it it is and can be because like at the end of the day, like you know, how the health matters behind it, right? So it's not like a looks thing, it's not like X, Y, and Z. It's like the health and your body mobility. Like, I'm sure my body is not healthy or not not healthy, not happy carrying this weight that it's not used to for my frame because I'm only five five. So I I acknowledge that in the healthiest way that I can, right? Without letting it like consume me. So I think you know, the end goal is to get me that heavy at least to start, and then maybe look at a different way best from there. But the conversation with my professor was very much like I want you to be at the weight where you will just be able to perform your best. Like if that's gonna be super heavy, just you know, with some muscle on you, I'm okay with that. If that's heavy because that's what you feel is gonna be, I'm okay with that. I just want you to be able to perform your jiu-two as your best capabilities. And that's when I knew, like, I was really with the right person, right? Like that he's definitely my professor that understands me because I think it would be easy for some professors to be like, just listen, white girl. It's really not that hard. And I was like, it's actually like it is.

SPEAKER_02

Like going to bike, like go biking with a plastic bag. Like, but do you know what that even feels like? I read something the other day, like, and I struggle with that without I'm fairly certain for the last three years I've been under-eating and over-training. And so, like, injury has really knocked me on my cheeks to say, like, what are my coping strategies and what is my identity guide to how I look? And so that's a challenge. And I read the other day something like, if you have to overeat no under eat and overtrain to fit that body, is that really your body? Is that really your best figure? Like, are there certain things I could tighten up to be better? Um, but also I can't put myself in this like chronically high cortisol levels or what stress situations because I'm going to get injured. I'm not going to be able to lift as heavy. My sleep is gonna suffer. I'm gonna be a monster getting around. It's like all of those things, that quality of life thing. It doesn't have to be drastic because I think the last five, ten pounds, whatever, we're the only ones that notice that. No one else does.

SPEAKER_00

And that's oh, but you do remember, you know, like this was five pounds ago. I put on a pair of shorts like they were a little tighter than they used to be. Like they shrunk, they shrunk, they shrunk.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, it's uh it's a tricky business where competition is related to a scale. But that's a whole nother story.

SPEAKER_00

But and I I I am constantly doing something like today and yesterday and every day I'm doing something. So I would love for my body to like be happy with like the movement, right? Because it's like, you know, I have bad ankles from a car accident and a jiu-jitsu thing, and so my ankles at the end of the day, sometimes are like, oh, you're like, oh, they're so swollen. And if I was at a lower weight, my body would be able to manage that a lot better. So there's just so many benefits to putting your body at a place that where it can handle the weight that you are, and so I think that's always the end goal. And I think if it wasn't for jujitsu, it wouldn't be such a priority. So I really like have to acknowledge that those two things are very much correlated, that I only care about my health and my well-being because it directly impacts how I train, how I show up, and you know, how I do at these competitions, which to me mean a lot to me.

SPEAKER_02

And knowing that as long as we keep a healthy attitude about it in perspective, that is gonna pay dividends in you 20, 30 years from now. Right, right. So taking care of it's it's like playing the long and short game of it. So cutting to lose 12 pounds, but to gain 15 back after is not going to help me in the long run. But making whatever choices can lead to stronger joints and better bone density as I'm gonna older. So as long as I keep the right mind frame about it and I don't get too.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and maybe by the time I'm able to get to heavyweight class, maybe then we can talk about cutting me to like medium heavy or whatever. But the goal right now for me is just to get to heavy.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah. And those are like XYZ pound-wise numbers. I have no idea. But also it doesn't really matter because it could be everybody's goal is so specific. Sometimes I've heard that maintenance is harder to do than it is just the weight loss piece because you're like, I can do these wild things. It's not sustainable, but it's gonna get me down. But just to stay there that is trying to find that balance and then and like unbreaking those habits is so easy.

SPEAKER_00

Like the the it's kind of like training, right? You could train for months and months and months. You take a week off, and it's like your body's like, what's this thing you're doing? It's the same thing with like eating habits, right? It's taking forever to break one eating habit or get on a good routine, and then you just take one vacation in Brazil, and it just becomes like whatever, I can have all the cheese bread I want.

SPEAKER_02

I did. Um, we went to like a Chicago-style dish pizza place last night, and I'm supposed to be like really anti-inflammatory because I have like autoimmune stuff. It's like the heaviest bread and the most cheese. And it was so good. I'm like, why do I feel like a balloon and also want to die? Oh, probably because the piece is the size of my head, that wasn't the best choice. I shouldn't do that. I do that every once in a while, but I'm absolutely not eating leftovers next day. Because at least at the end of the day, if I feel bad, hopefully that will deter me by doing it.

SPEAKER_00

Doesn't always work that way though. No, but you remember quickly, you're like, why don't we eat this? Oh, that's why we don't eat this. And I'm definitely like, I feel like when I was younger, I could totally chow down a medium pizza and a Coke and just like I'm good for the day and not gain a pound. Like when I was 22, like, you know, I would go out with my friends, and then in the morning I would have like a bagel, and like that's what I would eat the whole day and like not really care. And like, you know, if I gain like two or three pounds, I'd be like, whatever. You know, you know, I'll work that off somehow. And then you would, but it's not the same as you get older. Your body is like you had a slice of pizza two, three days ago, and now your body hurts.

SPEAKER_02

I used to work at a bagel shop and on break I'd get a cheese everything bagel with butter and cream cheese on it. It was so good. I mean, it was just the best thing of beauty, but also now I'm like, but I need protein in the morning. I can't eat something sweet anymore.

SPEAKER_00

Have you seen the meme where it's like I didn't have I've never been so harassed by the word protein in my life. And it's like, yeah, because everything you're like, protein's channel.

SPEAKER_02

I'm like raw docking the frontisserie chicken at 9 30. I'm like, I didn't eat my protein goals. Oh, the other day when I had a a cup of out-of-the-box bone broth, it tasted like drinking cat food. I'm like, this is the worst ever. And also, I just cannot be bothered to heat it up.

SPEAKER_00

I had like I made one day like steak and eggs at like lunchtime, and I'm like, who am I? It was just like a nice fat piece of steak with like three pressurizes, and I'm like, what in the what in the Craig Jones? Am I?

SPEAKER_02

I chased it with some twizzlers, I'm like, it's called balance people.

SPEAKER_00

I'm like, what do I want to make? I'm like, whatever, I'll do like a steak and like three eggs. I'm like, what a bro. I love it. Bro dinner. Bro dinner, my girl dinner will be like pieces of salapy with cheese and like nuts. And then one of my teammates the other day he goes, you know, that has a lot of sodium. And I was like, Stop crushing my dreams.

SPEAKER_02

It's like a lot of cheese. Yeah. I was in Europe with some friends, and he's dairy-free, gluten-free, and she's a vegan. So we went and got this like I got this beautiful thing of cheese at just like regular supermarket. I ate so much cheese over two days. Like, I feel like a brick. Yeah, because that was a lot of cheese. I can't do that anymore. I was feeling uh, I love a good conversation about IVJJF that turns it into eating steak, eggs, and cheese. It works. It goes. What's your sell what's your go-to celebratory? I well, we should not celebrate with food because that's how it relates. But sometimes we need sweet treats. Do you have like a not a superstition, but do you have like a thing after a tournament you go to?

SPEAKER_00

So I'm a little different in the sense of like once I'm done competing, this turns now into everybody who supported me along. So I turn to my friends and I go, What do you guys want to eat? Like it immediately turns into thank you for dedicating yourself from four o'clock to eight o'clock if I choose to do the open. And for pulling me back into the car when I try to run away. And so, you know, they tend to pick, so they'll either pick Korean barbecue, right? Because all the meats, all the protein. My best friend loves chilies, and I just think that's so hilarious because who loves chilies? Like when she told me, I was like, I haven't even been to a chilies in a really long time. So we'll go to chilies, and uh, she loves to do uh, she'll go, can we eat? Do we need a drink? Do we get a drink? I was like, that's kind of drink. It comes with like pop rocks in it, a take home glass. Exactly. It's like the most like childish drink ever, where it's just like pink bubbles at the top, and you're just like, Okay. So they pick the meal always. Sometimes uh my best friend will be like, Oh, because she calls me the foodie of the group. She was like, It's just yelp. And so I'll pick some, like, she'll tell me, like, I really want barbecue. And I was like, All right, let me find you a bar. Because you know, we come on here to compete, or we go out, you know, we're we've been to Florida to compete, we've been all over, so it'll genuinely be her choice. Um, if for whatever reason she can't come to my tournament, like she wasn't able to go master international, it was still about me and my friends. Me and my friend Christina went to a really nice different Korean barbecue, but like her kids were with us. It was like the most beautiful thing. Like, I think that like it's not so much the food, but it's the people and the depression, right? And to me, that's like that's the really fun part because you're sitting there. My friends know better than to talk to me about the competition. We're just literally talking about anything but like what are we gonna do tomorrow? Like, you know, it's it's nice when there was all this buildup and no matter what happens, there's still something good at the end, right? Which is hanging out with your friends and enjoying time with them. I always tell people that I'm like you should plan a fun thing to do. Nice because if you win, you're gonna want to something. But if you lose, you're also gonna want something else to look forward to. So it's like a win-win situation if you lose, lose.

SPEAKER_02

I like that. Well, it's all about again, it's about balance. Yeah. Our life is not gonna hinge on the number of medals we have or the points that we get because it's about the sometimes it's a journey day, sometimes it's a lesson day, sometimes it is a victory day, and then you get to walk out. But there's always something to learn along that way.

SPEAKER_00

Yeah, and if you make it a thing with your friends and it becomes this like adventure you guys go all on, and I remember the tournaments based off what we did rather than like my outcome. I have to sit there and think, how did I do last year at America National School? But I totally remember like having to pick up Robert at the airport and like him getting lost because we had no idea how to navigate the Las Vegas airport. That's so funny. So I think all those things really take away from the heaviness of computing.

SPEAKER_02

Yeah, I love that. But and I hope that getting a chance to talk about it and when people listen, they're like, oh yeah, I can do that. Or I was told to bring an extra ghee. So thank you for that one, Daisy. Yeah. Oh my gosh, as we wrap it up. I said there's a huge thank you. I'm excited to go back and listen to this and see how it went. But thank you, Daisy, for being on the show and our first, like first side by side. So that's fun.

SPEAKER_00

We're together. This is not AI.

SPEAKER_02

I know. We're like, there's been far too many mistakes. AI on that. Okay, so thank you for being on the show. And I'm excited to push this one out to the crowd. That'll be a fun listening. Oh, as well. My shout-out this week goes to my friends that know things. We all have friends that know things. So, like you get a blister. Who do you talk to for the correct proper care? When you need to know how to do a specific role in jujitsu, that one very roly pulley friend. Daisy is our competition IBJJF friend. If you have any questions, contact her. I'm sure she would love to talk to you more about it. So, yes, we all need those phona friends, but not everybody can answer all the questions. So we need lots and lots and lots of friends that can help solve all of our problems. As I wrap up the 40th episode, a huge thank you for Daisy for being such a good sport and re-recording with me. Thank you to all of my listeners that have listened to the episode. It's been an amazing journey along the way. Thank you for getting to the end of this episode. I know this one was long, but in general, this has been such a wild ride, and I'm so grateful for every single one of you. Until next time, I hope you stay cozy. And don't forget to check your registration. You can do it. Sign up for that match or not. Who knows? Do what works for you.