EP. 11 This is Your Reset Season

We’re halfway through the year—and this isn’t about starting over, it’s about realigning.

In this mid-year reset, we’re getting honest about where we are, what we’ve had to release, and who we’re still becoming. From boundaries to spiritual grounding, this episode is your reminder that growth isn’t always pretty—but it is always in progress.

We close with The Becoming Commitment—a powerful moment where we each write down one intentional shift we’re committing to for the next six months and hold ourselves accountable until December.

You’re not behind—you’re becoming.

Transcript

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And three, two, and one. Welcome back to another episode of Healing and Stop It's Healing. Halfway through the years. This isn't another. It's truly a bit. A little inconsistent. A little in between. Bring you're in the right place. So let's talk boundaries. Becoming and everything it takes to realign, reset, and let this life up out. Now somewhere between January goals and June reality, life started life. The vision was clear, the discipline was there, you had the plan, the focus, the mindset, and then life shifted. You got tired, you got distracted, things didn't go the way you expected. And if you're being real with yourself, friend, you don't feel like the person you said you be by now. But hear me, this is not where it ends. Now this isn't a breakdown, it's a reset. This isn't failure, it's actually formation. And this moment right here, it's where you decide who you're becoming next. So hey y'all, welcome back and let's jump right into it. So let's take a moment and really look at it. You know, not the version we posted, not the version we told people, but the real version. Who were you in January? What did you say you were going to do? What habits were you committed to? What mindset were you stepping into? What version of yourself did you promise you'd become? Because if I'm being honest, I had a vision too. I had goals, I had structure, I had things mapped out in my head, like, yeah, this is my year. And maybe you did too. But somewhere along the way, like I said, life started life. Things got heavy, you got tired, you lost the momentum, you started, and you stopped. Then you started again and you stop again. And now here we are. Mid-year looking up, like, wait, how did I even get here? And if you're being real, maybe there's a little disappointment too there. Maybe a little frustration, and maybe even a little guilt. Like, you should be further. Like you should have done more. You didn't show up the way you said you would. But let me shift that for you right now. Because growth doesn't always look like progress. You know, sometimes it's gonna have its pauses, it's gotta take some healing, and sometimes it looks like falling back just so you can come back stronger and more aligned. And friend, I need you to hear this. Just because it didn't happen the way you planned, it doesn't mean it's not happening at all. Okay, you're not stuck, you're becoming even in the inconsistency, even in the slow moments, and even in the times you felt like you were doing absolutely nothing, something was still shifting in you. Your mindset, your awareness, your standards, and your capacity. So, no, you're not where you thought you'd be, but you're also not who you used to be, friend. And that right there, now that is growth. So before we rush into fixing everything, and before we start over for the third time, I just want you to sit with this version of yourself for a second. And it's not to judge them, it's to understand them. Because awareness, that's where the reset really truly begins. And once you've taken that honest look, the next question becomes who didn't come with me? You know, what am I no longer carrying into the next version of myself? Because let's be real, some of us aren't stuck because we don't know what to do. We're stuck because we're still holding on to what we're supposed to release. And boy, did I have to sit with that one. You know, like what habits did I keep going back to even when I knew they weren't serving me? Procrastination, inconsistency, starting strong and not finishing at all. You know, saying I'm gonna do it, and then talking myself right out of it. And it's not because I didn't care, it was because discipline got uncomfortable. And then there's the mindset, you know, that quiet self-doubt, that overthinking, and that constant comparison. You know, watching everybody else move forward and questioning yourself, like, you know, am I doing enough? And honestly, am I even enough? Because the truth is you can't grow into a new version of yourself while thinking like the old one. But for me, the hardest part wasn't even the habits, it was the people. Letting go, closing chapters, having conversations that I didn't want to have, and I'm talking about real conversations, the kind of where you finally say what you need, how you need to be loved, how you need to be met, and realizing they just couldn't meet you there. And that's a different kind of hurt, you know, because it's not always about people being bad people, and sometimes they're just not aligned with where you are or where you're going. And I had to make some real decisions. Some people I had those conversations with, and we grew. We adjusted and we found a new way to meet each other. And then there's others I just had to let go. But it wasn't out of anger and it wasn't out of hate, it was out of growth. Because I can't keep shrinking myself just to maintain a connection. You know, I can't keep explaining my worth to people who don't even have the capacity to hold it. And that was the hard truth that I had to swallow. Because letting go of people who matter to you, it doesn't always feel empowering, especially at first. You know, it feels heavy, it feels emotional, it feels like loss. But I had to remind myself: just because it's hard, it doesn't mean it's wrong. So I started asking myself, you know, what is draining me? What is distracting me? And more importantly, what is delaying me from my purpose? And why am I still holding on to it? Because the truth is, I can't become her and carry everything that broke the past her. You know, I'm gonna say that again. You can't become who you want to be carrying on to everything that broke you. Because some things didn't fall off. You made the decision to release them. And that takes strength, that takes growth, that takes choosing yourself even when it hurts. So, no, everything didn't come with me. And as hard as it was, I'm learning that letting go isn't loss. You know, it's alignment because where I'm going, it requires a different version of me. And I'm finally ready to show up as her. Now, after all of that, you know, after the reflection, after the releasing, after the hard conversations and the hard decisions, the real question becomes: who am I now? Not who I said I'd be in January, not the version of me I had perfectly planned, mapped out in my head. But who am I right now in this moment? Because her looks different now. You know, she's not perfect, she doesn't have it all figured out. You know, she's not waking up every day motivated and disciplined and consistent, but she's aware. She's intentional, she's choosing differently, and that counts because becoming her was never about being flawless, it was about being aligned. Aligned in my mindset, aligned in my habits, aligned in what I allow and what I no longer tolerate. And one thing I had to accept is this I'm not chasing her anymore. I'm building her day by day, choice by choice, boundary by boundary. Sometimes that looks like discipline, doing what I said I was going to do, even when I don't feel like it. Sometimes it looks like rest, you know, not quitting, but giving myself space to reset without guilt. Sometimes it looks like choosing peace, you know, walking away from chaos, even when it tries to pull me back in. And sometimes, more like all the time, it looks like choosing God over control. You know, letting go of the need to figure everything out and just trusting that I'm being led even when I don't have all the answers. Because the truth is, becoming her isn't allowed. It's not always aesthetic, it's not always something you can post. A lot of it is quiet. You know, it's the small decisions nobody sees, it's the boundaries nobody applauds, it's the growth that happens behind the scenes. And I think we underestimate that part. You know, we think if it's not big, it's not working. But it's the small shifts that change everything. Waking up and trying again, thinking differently, responding differently, choosing yourself even in the small ways. You know, that's how she's built. So, no, I'm not who I thought I'd be by now, but I'm also not who I used to be. And I'm finally okay with that, you know, because I can see the growth, I can feel the shift, I can recognize that I'm becoming someone who is more grounded, more aware, and more aligned. And that version of me, you know, she's worth the process. So I'm not rushing this anymore. I'm not gonna force it, I'm allowing myself to become her fully, honestly, and most importantly at my own pace. Because this time, oh, it's real. And for me, this shift hasn't just been personal, it's been spiritual. Because somewhere in the middle of all of this, the inconsistency, the distractions, the starting and stopping, you know, I had to check my own personal relationship with God. And it's not in a condemning way and not in a you're doing it wrong kind of way, but in an honest way. Like, God, where have I been? And if I'm being real, there are moments I wasn't as consistent as I wanted to be. You know, moments I didn't pray like I said I would, moments I didn't spend time with God the way I needed to. And for a second, I felt that guilt. Like I had to get it all together before I came back. Like I needed to be more disciplined, more put together, more quote unquote right before I could really reconnect. But that's not how God works. Because even in the moments I felt distant, God never moved. Even when I wasn't showing up the way I should have, God was still present. He was still covering me, still guiding me, still giving me grace I didn't even realize I need. And I had to shift my mindset on that. Because this reset is not about coming back perfect, it's about coming back honest. It's about saying, God, here I am as I am. I'm not hiding, not pretending, and I'm not waiting until I get it together. I'm just gonna show up and rebuild that connection and for real this time. Because I don't just want discipline without God, I don't just want routines without relationships, I don't just want to look like I'm growing. I want to be rooted while I'm growing, and that requires a different posture, less control and more surrender, less pressure and more trust. Because maybe, just maybe, God was never asking me to hustle harder. You know, maybe he was asking me to come closer, to trust him more, to lean on him more, to stop trying to figure everything out on my own. And that's where my real reset started. Not in my planner, not in my routine, but in my posture, in my heart, in my decisions to reconnect without guilt, without shame, without pressure to be perfect. So now I'm not resetting from a place of failure. I'm resetting from a place of grace, from experience, from growth, and from knowing that even when I felt off, I was never out of reach. And that right there, that honestly changes everything for me. Now, before we close, I don't just want you to hear this episode, I want you to feel it. So wherever you are right now, just take a second. Slow down, take a breath in, and let it out. And now I want you to picture yourself at the start of this year, the energy you had, the goals you set, the version of you that you were reaching for. Just sit with her for a moment. Now, gently bring yourself back to where you are today. No pressure, no disappointment, just truth. Because this is where I am. And in this moment, I want you to recognize what feels heavy. But don't overthink it, don't analyze it, just feel it. What have you been carrying that no longer fits with who you're becoming? Now imagine yourself setting it down, not forcing it, not fighting it, but just releasing it, letting it go with intention. And now shift your focus. I want you to picture the version of you that you're stepping into. It's not perfect, not finished, but aligned, grounded, at peace with her growth. See her clearly, you know the way she moves, the way she protects her energy, and the way she shows up for herself and with God. Now here's the part that matters. You don't have to become her all at once. You just gotta take one step toward her. So in this moment, decide what that step is. One shift, one boundary, one choice. I mean something real. And as you sit with that, I want you to remind yourself that I am allowed to reset. I am allowed to grow. I am allowed to become without rushing this process. Now, friend, take one more breath, and when you're ready, carry that version of you with you. And just like that, you made it to this moment. You know, not the version you planned, not the version that had it all mapped out perfectly, but the version that kept going anyway. The version that had to pause, had to reflect, had to let some things go, and find her way back to herself and back to God. And after everything we just walked through, say it with me, guys. That's growth, baby. And that's real growth at that. Not the kind that looks perfect on the outside, but the kind that shifts you on the inside, the kind that makes you think differently, move differently, choose differently. And I need you to hear this. Don't downplay where you are right now. Don't rush past this version of you just because she's still in progress. Because this version, oh, she's stronger, she's wiser, and she's more aware. She's learning how to set boundaries, how to protect her peace, and learning how to stop pouring into places that can't pour back into her. And that matters. That counts, and that's becoming. Now, before we even close, I want us to do something together, something else a little different here. And I don't want you to just think about it. Friend, I want you to actually do it. Okay, this right here is what I'm gonna call the becoming commitment. So, whenever you're ready, I want you to grab something, your journal or your notes app in your phone, a piece of paper, but something you can keep with you 24-7, okay? 24-8 at that. And I want you to write this down. Not later. No, we're not gonna come back to it. Not I'll come back to it later. Right now, in this moment, go grab that piece of paper, press pause if you need to go grab it, okay? But I want you to write one thing, just one, one thing within yourself that you are committed to changing, growing, or strengthening over the next six months. Okay, something real, something honest, and something that's gonna require you to show up differently. Okay, so take some time, think about it, write it down, pause if you need to, and once you write it, don't just close it and forget it. Okay, I want you to keep it, put it somewhere you see it, carry it with you 24/7, come back to it, but keep it and let it remind you on the days you feel off, on the days you feel unmotivated, on the days you feel like you're not making progress, because this is your personal commitment to your becoming. And I'm not just telling you to do this, okay? I'm doing it with you, friend, okay. So mind is gonna be pouring more into myself and into my craft, you know, showing up for me consistently, nurturing what God placed inside of me intentionally. That's my commitment to myself. So now you have yours, and we're holding on to this together because when December comes, we're coming back to this moment, we're going to reflect, we're gonna check in, and we're gonna see just how much growth really happened. Not perfectly, but faithfully. So don't take this lightly, okay? Because I'm not taking it lightly. Write it, keep it, and most importantly, live it. Because this right here, this is where your next level begins. So as we move forward from here, give yourself grace on the days you don't get it all right. Stay intentional in the small choices that no one else sees. Protect your energy like it actually matters, because friend, it does. And most importantly, stay connected to God not just when it's easy, not just when it you feel consistent, but right here in the middle of your becoming because you didn't miss your moment, you didn't fall behind, you're not starting over. Friend, you're moving forward with more awareness, more strength, and more alignment than you had before. And that changes everything. All right, that's a wrap for today, friends. Thank you for showing up for your messy, real, and willing to heal self. If this episode spoke to you, go ahead and share it with someone who might need it. And don't forget to follow the show so we can keep growing together. And until next time, remember, protect your peace, take care of your energy, and remember that becoming might be messy, but it's also beautiful. You've been listening to another episode of Healing Out Loud, Boundaries and Becoming. You keep healing, keep it coming, and keep laughing out loud. And it's your girl, your host, who will continue to do the utmost payload signs off until next time.