Equanimity & The Art Of Falling

We explore equanimity as the art of falling, learning how to stay steady and open when life feels uncertain. We share how caring perspective helps us face world news, strong emotions, and personal hardship without losing our heart. 
• equanimity as surrender to change and uncertainty 
• staying caring without getting overwhelmed by current events 
• why few teachers teach equanimity and what depth requires 
• mindfulness vs equanimity and where they overlap 
• equanimity as love in the midst of vulnerability 
• “caring perspective” as a blend of heart and wisdom 
• the felt difference between present-moment awareness and time-vastness 
• practicing free-fall instead of grabbing for control 
• grief, fear, and acceptance as outcomes of letting ourselves fall 
• ego, masks, and what drops away when we stop bracing 

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Mindfulness Exercises with Sean Fargo is a practical, grounded mindfulness podcast for people who want meditation to actually help in real life.

Hosted by Sean Fargo — a former Buddhist monk, mindfulness teacher, and founder of MindfulnessExercises.com — this podcast explores how mindfulness can support mental health, emotional regulation, trauma sensitivity, chronic pain, leadership, creativity, and meaningful work.

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• Practical mindfulness and meditation teachings
• Conversations with respected meditation teachers, clinicians, authors, and researchers
• Real-world insights for therapists, coaches, yoga teachers, educators, and caregivers
• Gentle reflections for anyone navigating stress, anxiety, burnout, grief, or change

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• Mindfulness meditation for everyday life
• Trauma-sensitive and compassion-based practices
• Teaching mindfulness in an authentic, non-performative way
• Deepening your own practice while supporting others

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Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Welcome to the Mindfulness Exercises Podcast. My name is Sean Fargo, and today we're going to be exploring the art of falling, a deep dive into equanimity. Equanimity may often be described as the art of falling, or when love meets vulnerability, this ability to stay steady and open, even when life feels like it's moving out of control. So dive with us into the beauty of surrendering to change and uncertainty, a sense of groundlessness as we're moving through this universe. Instead of trying to brace against it with fear and constriction, by letting go of the need to grab onto something solid, we actually find a vast sense of peace and perspective that allows us to meet the world's challenges with more of a balanced, caring heart.

SPEAKER_00 1:10

I think it was for me a struggle I've been having for the last couple of years is with the world news. And so like listening to that really helped me get a better perspective, not to be overwhelmed with what's going on, but still caring. What I caught, it was excellent, quite good.

News Overwhelm And Caring Perspective

Why Equanimity Is Hard To Teach

SPEAKER_01 1:32

I'm glad you liked it. I had a separate conversation with Margaret Collin, the presenter, about equanimity. We talked about different kinds of subtopics. It's kind of nice to have the podcast conversation and then kind of talk about other things in the presentation that you came to. So I think they can complement each other well. Feel free to check that out anytime. It was a nice conversation that we had around equanimity. I mean, equanimity is not the easiest topic to understand, much less practice, much less teach. I'm really glad to see a teacher of her caliber who's a very high-caliber teacher for a long time. Pardon my term caliber, but like a strong teacher, a deep practitioner, a very experienced teacher, someone of her depth, go into equanimity and share her insights because it is a practice and a teaching that most teachers shy away from for good reason, because you need depth to be able to do it justice and to be able to articulate it clearly from experience. So this is to say that I'm really grateful that she put together the book and is sharing this widely. And my hope is that she inspires new generations of mindfulness teachers, i.e., you, to incorporate some of these teachings in your work. My hope is that some of you incorporate some of today's guest teacher into your work, Jay Vidyarthy, talking about mindfulness and technology, screen addiction, false sense of urgency, etc. For all of these guest teachers who come through, it's helpful for us to be inspired, impact our practice, and to sense into what do I feel inspired to share, inspired to teach. Throughout the life of this program, different people in the program will decide on a specialty. I want to teach mindfulness for kids. I want to teach mindfulness for anxiety, I want to teach mindfulness for thousands of options. Types of people, types of challenges, types of goals, types of behavior, types of energy. But this is all to say that you don't hear that many teachings or teachers about equanimity. It's quite powerful. And my hope is that we see more teachers and more teachings on equanimity in the future because we need it.

SPEAKER_00 4:35

Not all the time, but like I'll just notice where, and then I'm completely off my meditation. Like it was something I needed to hear. And I've listened to some of Sharon Salzberg's talks on it, and just find that it is a very important aspect that needs to be addressed, sort of, or just brought to mind. And just even uh like our personal practices. When you lose your perspective, or you know, and you think you're doing it right, but then you realize, oh, wait a second, I'm not being mindful on myself, sort of thing. I don't know if I'm explaining it properly or clearly. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 5:19

Yeah. Well, that's the practice, is to notice when we're off balance or off-center, and just uh, you know, gently come back. It's an art. Not always easy. I dropped a link to Sharon Salzberg talking about equanimity in the midst of current events, and how to find equanimity and care and perspective. It includes a bit of a long-winded introduction of her in the beginning, so please bear with me on that. I tend to go a little overboard in my introductions of my heroes. Any other questions, comments, shares, requests?

SPEAKER_02 6:09

English is not my first language, so I went to see what equanimity is. Did I say correctly?

SPEAKER_01 6:16

Yeah, it's pretty good. Equanimity.

Is Equanimity Just Mindfulness

SPEAKER_02 6:19

Yeah, so it doesn't ring the bell what is different from what I already knew mindfulness is. So if we say that in mindfulness we're giving more attention or focusing equanimity, it's kind of redundant for me. So please clarify because maybe it's bringing something else that I didn't perceive yet. For me, they are synonyms for me, at least the way I felt the first time I goes, wow, I want this for me. I need this for myself, and I just don't want to be a client. I want to be a teacher, not to perform as a teacher per se, but I want to teach these, include these in my toolbox or my Mary Poppins bag for my clients.

SPEAKER_01 7:02

So when you teach mindfulness, do you give people a spoonful of sugar?

SPEAKER_02 7:09

No, because the sugar is the peace they get. Oh. That's the reward.

SPEAKER_01 7:15

So different kind of Mary Poppins bag.

SPEAKER_02 7:18

Yes, a little bit different.

SPEAKER_01 7:19

Raditz. When Margaret Cullen was talking about equanimity, in the very end, she said that Sharon Salzburg equates mindfulness and equanimity. So your instinct is shared by Sharon Salzberg. She also said that the very well-respected Alan Wallace, highly respected teacher, disagrees. She also said that equanimity equals love in the midst of vulnerability. Another well-respected teacher, Gil Fronsdale, describes equanimity as caring perspective. It's like a blend of heart and wisdom. Sort of a blend of relating to the absolute and the relative. I think your hunch that mindfulness and equanimity are very similar. You can just go with that and be okay, in my opinion. I do think there's a lot of like nuance to consider that she brings into the podcast conversation, her book, the workshop. Certainly, there are other resources on equanimity out there as well. But there's a lot of overlap, I would say.

SPEAKER_02 8:49

And for you, Sean, for you in your practice and your trajectory, do you have any kind of a different colors or different textures that you can add to one or to the other?

Felt Sense Of Mindfulness Vs Equanimity

Free Falling Into Uncertainty

Acceptance During Personal Hard Times

SPEAKER_01 9:02

I mean, for me, like in a felt experience, one thing that comes up for me is mindfulness. There's a presence of like what's actually happening right now. I'm in this moment. And there may be vulnerability, there may be suffering, there may be a little bit of worry or a little bit of stress or something that I'm bringing presence to, or maybe there's a lot, but there's a presence with what's happening. And then with equanimity, if I'm like sensing into equanimity, for me, what happens in real time is that there's a remembering that this will change, and that in fact it's actually already changing, like right now. What I'm feeling is changing as I'm feeling it, as I'm aware of it. Like this is changing and it will continue to change, and it will continue to change for minutes, hours, days, years, millennia, maybe forever, that this is a fluid experience. And that time is not so wrapped up into a little box that I feel like it's in sometimes. Do you know what I mean? Like it can feel tense and pressure filled, and like right now is big. That feeling like there may be overwhelm, and like, ah, with equanimity, there's a change to it, but there's also a time vastness that I can feel a little bit, and it kind of helps me feel a little bit less pressured. We talk about spaciousness, but there's also like a timelessness, there's a vastness, and for me, it kind of helps me to not take things so personally or to believe that it's like as serious as it is. I try to like sprinkle in a little bit of like what would I like for myself right now? I don't know, I just find that helpful for me. So when I sense into equanimity, the perspective piece of the caring perspective, the perspective piece is like, this is changing, there's a lot of time here. And also, I don't know how many of you are like on my email list, but I sent an email yesterday in the five mindful musings newsletter. I think the second musing included a video about Pema Chodron talking about equanimity, and she talks about it in terms of being okay with uncertainty or sensing into uncertainty and finding peace with uncertainty, and that sometimes it feels like we're free-falling. And this actually came up in the podcast episode of Margaret, but it feels like we're falling, like in the sky, like out of an airplane. It's so instinctive for us to grabbing onto anything. This feeling of falling scary, and there's nothing I can grab onto. And I'm trying to grab on, I'm trying to like control, I'm trying to brace, you know, I'm like bracing, manipulating, controlling, grabbing, but can we notice that? Like, can we just fall? Can we fall and notice this experience of falling? And it may not feel natural. Can we surrender to this experience of falling and just let ourselves fall and see what happens? And sometimes grief comes. If we let ourselves fall, we may feel like this energy of grief surface. Or we may realize that this surrendering to falling is actually like the rest that we need from constantly trying to grab. Or we may realize what we're not willing to accept. I don't want to accept X or Y or Z. And that might be killing us. When we surrender to the falling and we just let ourselves fall, and we try to make friends with falling and just let ourselves feel it and just let ourselves fall. Sometimes we kind of realize what kind of perspective we need. We kind of sense into what we're scared of. Like what is the ground that we're afraid of hitting. And sometimes we just need to hit the ground and accept it instead of trying to escape it. Going through some stuff right now, personally, and extremely grateful for my practice because it's saving me in many ways. I just feel like it's so much easier when I work with reality with acceptance of like, yeah, this is happening. I can accept this more and more and more partly because I know that if I keep coming back to right now with care and gentleness, I can meet anything. And I'm meeting this with present moment care in the midst of all sorts of intense emotions. I'm allowing those emotions to come up, I'm meeting them with gentleness, I'm allowing myself to feel it more and more. It's super scary that I'm doing it and I'm getting through it. I have no idea what's gonna happen, but I keep coming back to right now. Everything's always changing all the time. This is right now, but it's also like there's many, many, many now's. And I keep coming back to this now and this now. I try to have this caring perspective. Love in the midst of vulnerability, feeling very vulnerable. Can I meet that with love? We're all vulnerable. I think that's one of the things that makes us lovable.

SPEAKER_02 15:21

Relatable. Very I don't want to extend your time, but what came to me, and we can talk this in another time, but we are avoiding so much. But when we are falling, I think we end up meeting all the other moments that we were grabbing on the sides. We just face ourselves grabbing and grabbing, grabbing. So it's not only that momentarily fall, but we come falling in all the other moments that we avoided. So that's what came to me. That's why so scared because we've held so badly on the sides, so many moments for decades. So falling will give us permission to fall in all the other moments, and we think that we do all fall at the same time, and this is death. Death of the ego, right?

SPEAKER_01 16:11

Death, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 16:13

Now it's you and you. The masks have to come down to fall.

SPEAKER_01 16:18

That's right, that's right.

SPEAKER_02 16:19

Thank you, Sean.

Falling As Ego Death And Closing

SPEAKER_01 16:20

Yeah, thank you, Katya. Well, back to falling. Wish you all love and peace and presence and care as we all fall and dance and help others in this wild existence. Thank you for co creating community. I wish you all a wonderful rest of your day and I'm rooting for all of you. Thank you, everybody.