Stop Starting Over: Build Habits Now for a Summer You Actually Love

Are you tired of starting over every Monday? You’re not alone. In this episode, I dive deep into why the “reset on Monday” mindset keeps so many women stuck and how to break the cycle.

We’ll cover:

•  How inconsistency in real life: travel, social events, weekends sabotages fat loss 
•  Why alcohol and indulging aren’t failures, but signals your habits need a stronger foundation 
•  How to anchor your day with protein, regulate blood sugar, and build movement habits that travel with you 
•  The mindset shift from perfection to consistency and why identity is the missing piece 
•  Real-life examples from travel, family events, and weekends where habits are most likely to slip 
•  Strategies for building summer-proof habits now so you feel confident when the season arrives 

I also share how I approach fat loss in real life.  Not extremes, not deprivation, not “perfect Monday starts” and I chat about how you can join my all new 1:1 FASTer Way To Fat Loss new client coaching group for women ready to create consistency that lasts.

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Find me on Instagram for daily life, tips and fun content: @wellness.with.virginia

Helpful Links:

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:38

Hi, hello. Welcome back to Fit for Real Life. I'm sitting down to record this after just a really good weekend. It's Sunday night. I'm getting ready to head into the work week and we just had a great weekend. Nothing over the top, just some really good, like productive time, family time. The weather's been amazing. We've been outside a lot. And honestly, that warm, like almost summer feeling where you just know the season's about to shift feels great. And I don't know if you feel this too, but when the weather starts changing like that, I see it in myself. I see it in clients. I see it in clients, you know, as the year goes on, but something starts shifting, I think, mentally. You start thinking about summer and how you want to feel and how you want to show up. And for a lot of women, I feel like that's when the pressure kicks in. Um, it's kind of like this like nagging feeling of I need to get it together, I need to be more consistent, I need to start over. And if you're being honest with yourself, how many times have you said I'll start Monday? Because that's what we're talking about today. I did something similar during the holiday season, but I don't know. Like I'm a summertime person. I am more social in the summer, we have friends over, we entertain. And for me, that's just kind of when I just really enjoy, it's the season I enjoy the most. So I want you to talk through what this could actually look like. You start your week strong, veggies washed, protein prepped on Sunday, you've got structure, your meals are planned, your workouts are done, and you feel super in control. And then if you're like me, life starts to layer in. Monday is an office day for me. And then if I get home late and I don't feel like cooking, I want to grab something quick, I get less sleep, there's more to do. And then Wednesday and then Thursday. By Friday, you're so tired, and it's not that you don't care, it's just you want to break. And then you start to kind of loosen things up. Saturday comes along and it's not just one off choice, it's a shift. You're grazing, you're less intentional, maybe you're drinking, and you're not really thinking about protein or balance or movement. And then on Sunday, you're already thinking, I'll just start over tomorrow. And that's the cycle. And if that's your pattern right now, this is the exact pattern you are going to bring into summer. And I feel like we have to talk here about alcohol and you know, unscheduled meals, unscheduled grazing, unscheduled potlucks, because this is where most of us lose consistency. It's actually not during the week. It's not during workouts, but it's in those moments when you're tired and you're overstimulated and you just want something to be easy and be relief. And for me, when I was drinking alcohol, it didn't just add extra calories, it just gave me like an excuse to eat what I wanted because it was right there in front of me. So it would change my decisions around food, and I would be more likely to snack without thinking, skip protein, go for quick, you know, overprocessed, easy foods, eat past fullness. And then the next day I wasn't starting fresh because I was tired, super inflamed, more hungry, and then I would really crave sugar. And then that thought would come in, I've already messed up. And that's to me where it would just start like that over and over and over again. And that spiral is what would keep me stuck. And I would say, like, why only have alcohol on the weekends? But then it would be Thursday, and I was tired. And then if I already did it Thursday, I might as well do it Friday, you know, on the patio with friends, which would lead to Saturday. And, you know, you can you can see where this is going. And honestly, this is a conversation I have had with so many friends, so many coworkers, so many clients. It's the cycle that really keeps us from progressing. And I shared earlier this week, you know, that I had lost 40 pounds since 2023 and I've kept it off. But then my weight loss stalled, and a lot of that was because my mom went through this very serious, you know, health issue in 2025, and I just didn't have the emotional capacity to do anything extra. So I kept it off, and I'm very proud and happy that I did, but now I want to lose about 15 more pounds, and despite what you may see on Instagram, it is totally okay if you have a weight loss goal, if you have a strength goal, if you have a fat loss goal. I think sometimes, you know, the script gets a little flipped about like it's toxic to have a weight loss goal. And I personally don't believe that. I think you can have whatever goal you want to have. But for me, wanting to lose 15 pounds by summer and sharing on Instagram that I lost four pounds in the past five weeks, which in my mind in these days doesn't sound like a lot, but for someone who has low thyroid function, who's in her late 40s, who has a busy life, it is a lot. And I feel really, really good. But here's what worked: it wasn't perfection, it wasn't restriction. I say that always, but truly that doesn't work. And it wasn't cutting everything out, but it was building habits that stabilized my body so that I didn't spiral. So always first protein. I gave up eating clean, I gave up being perfect, and I just started asking myself, did my anchor my day with protein? Because when I do that, my hunger stabilizes, my energy stays steady, and my cravings go way down. Here's something else I did, and you know, I hesitate to share this because I don't want someone to be like, that's so basic, that's so boring. I noticed when I would have peanut butter in my house, I would walk by the refrigerator and take a spoonful and eat it. And I would put, I wouldn't measure the peanut butter anymore. I was just measuring with my heart because I figured while I'm doing all this and all these other areas. But when I got more accountable with that, and also my kids gave up chips for Lent only because really I asked them to. They were gonna do sugar, and I was like, Can you give up chips? Because that way I just won't buy them and they won't be in the house. And those are really the two significant things that I've done over the past five weeks that I really feel like played into this four pounds. Now, here's the tricky part: you can't celebrate that you lost four pounds and go crazy over the weekend because you're just gonna get inflamed and then it's gonna be that spiral and that cycle again. So also, it's so important to stop swinging between extremes. If you're air quote perfect during the week and then you're off on the weekend, your body never stabilizes. And when you're more consistent across all five days, not perfect, just consistent, that helps. And in the faster way, in our programming, we do our biggest strength training workouts on Saturday, it's generally leg day, and we enjoy a treat that day. And my clients will often ask, like, what should I do? And I'm like, a treat is whatever you view as a treat, a glass of wine, a meal out with your family, an ice cream cone, pick it. It's that one thing, whatever that one thing is, and then you move on. And for me, sometimes I don't even do a treat, but guess what? All those scoops of peanut butter, all they were were just fat, fat and salt, because I like all natural but salty peanut butter, or the chips that I was just grabbing without being accountable for. And I even talked about this with my VIP group this weekend. You need to find if you're kind of plateaued, the easiest thing to do, the lowest hanging food, fruit, is to find what's your version of chips and peanut butter. Find it, be accountable for it, just cut it out and see if it helps. Um, third thing to talk about is movement that supports you. You do not need more intensity, you need sustainability, strength training a few times a week, walking every day. Walking is one of the most underrated tools. Number one, the most important thing I think it does is it helps your digestion. So walk after you eat, it lowers your stress, it regulates your appetite, and it's super easy to do when you're traveling and you don't have equipment or you've got busy seasons in your life. Now, I love to walk at lunch, however, sometimes I can't. When I can't, I commit to a 10-minute walk in the morning and a 10-minute walk in the afternoon during the workday. I walk after my workout and generally I walk after dinner and I get about 7,500 steps a day. And some people, you know, they think that 10,000 steps is like the holy grail. You should be moving more than 5,000 steps a day, and anything beyond that is your personal goal to set. But I tell you, when I walk, especially during the workday, it really does those two things. It helps my digestion, it lowers my stress. Um, and then the fourth thing I think is important to talk about is alcohol awareness. And I'm not saying you need to cut out alcohol, but I am just saying when you drink, you should think about how do I want to feel tomorrow? What do I want to accomplish tomorrow? And what happens to me after that second or that third drink. And for me, that awareness just really changed a lot and it made my decision a lot easier. Um, I know a lot of people are traveling, you know, in the summer, spring break is coming up, and I just want to make this very realistic. When I am traveling with my family on vacation, because I also travel for work, when I'm on vacation with my family, I am not tracking everything, but I am paying attention. And I allow myself one pleasure thing a day, one, you know, meal out, one ice cream, whatever it is, chips and guac, if it's not Lent, right? But if we're going out to eat, I'm thinking about protein, I'm not skipping meals earlier, I'm just moving, I'm doing my strength training, I'm walking. And if I have a day that's off, it's okay. I don't start over, but I will say the last like several vacations that we have taken, when I have approached it in a more moderate sense, I've actually, believe it or not, I've actually lost weight when I came home, once the like travel inflammation wore off. And I really think it's because I didn't, you know, deprive myself. I enjoyed myself, but I also made really solid decisions all the rest of the day. Um, and I think that if you want summer to feel different, you don't need a plan that's more strict. You need a different focal point, you need something to change within you with respects to how you look at your goals. Um, you need to think about not starting over, not spiraling after one meal, not relying on perfect conditions. And ask yourself, what could I do today that would formulate a more consistent approach to my goals? What habits do I do that actually hold up on a Saturday? Like, what is Saturday proof? What does this look like on vacation? And a lot of people I talk to, and I actually shared this on Instagram stories today, you know, once my account kind of passed 7,000, 7,500 on Instagram, I actually got a lot more meaningful comments and conversations going and direct messages about joining the faster way and having me as a coach. And people will say, Well, I don't want to start because I have a baby shower. I don't want to start, I'm going to a bridal shower. And I'm like, you do not go to a baby or a bridal shower 365 days a year. You do not go on vacation. Despite what we may all see online, people are not on vacation year-round. Um, you are not traveling for work. Most people don't travel for work that much. Um, I probably travel for work twice a quarter and my trips are two to three days each. My habits and my consistency will hold up and I will still see progress regardless of all of those things. So when clients are going on vacation, I say you can do two things. You can try and, you know, hold up to your normal, or you can just let it let it rip and know what you have to do when you get started. None of that vacation time will undo your progress. I'm telling you, what undoes progress is every weekend when you hit the reset button on Monday. So instead of being so perfect and so dialed in Monday through Friday and then just letting loose because you just can't do it anymore on Saturday and Sunday, try to just be more consistent throughout the week. Um if you're tired of feeling like you're always like almost reaching your goal and you're always starting over, this is your chance to do it differently. You don't need to be harder, you don't need to be more extreme. You just need someone to help you understand structure without restriction, support around the weekends, around travel, around alcohol, around consistency, and having someone help you with those real life habits. Because your weight loss and fat loss isn't built in the perfect weeks, it's built in the weeks that are reality, that are everyday. And I will tell you when I check in with clients, when I meet with clients, you know, over Zoom, even clients who have had incredible progress, sometimes they just need a break. And one of the things that I suggest is do a D-load week. Don't track for a week. You know, eat the foods that you know that'll help you get you close to your goals and take a like take that mental break from tracking if it's too much. Take a deload week. Don't strength train, just walk, just do Pilates, just do the active recovery workouts and see if that just kind of refreshes you. I think everyone should do that once a quarter. And if you are ready and what I have talked about resonated here with you, I'd love to have you in my next group that starts Monday, which is kind of funny because I'm like talking about starting on Monday. But actually, um, tomorrow, Monday, March 30th, is one of the last days to register for my new client coaching group with a$50 discount code. So I don't know when our next$50 discount code will come. The Fasterway controls that. But what I do know is we have$50 off right now that expires on March 30th. If you head to my Instagram, that's the easiest way to get in touch with me. Um, you can direct message me, you can hop into my stories and just reply to one of them. It's very easy. You can comment on one of my reels and we'll start chatting. I really want you to think about if you are someone who's been stuck in the all-start on Monday cycle, how would it feel to know that you don't have to do that anymore? Like tomorrow Monday is the last Monday you're starting over. I have been, you know, sustaining my weight loss since 2023. I have clients who have done the exact same thing and they've lost over 40 pounds, over 50 pounds, over 50 inches. And everyone needs just a little nudge, right? Just a little reset nudge. Um, and so if you've achieved some goals and you've been in maintenance for a while and you're like, you know what, I need to kind of step it up again. Um, I'd love to have you join my group as well. Um, I really love podcast episodes that are like this. I mean, I love the interviews, I love episodes that are, you know, topic specific, but this is just something that to me feels really right in this season of spring, and then, you know, knowing that summer's around the corner, and that's when things can kind of get a little lax. And so I think if you put some structure around it now, some consistency around it now, summer could be the best summer that you had. It could be your healthiest summer, you could be your most fit summer. You could feel your best for this summer. And all of that starts with just getting started. Um, like I said, if this resonated with you, I'd love to chat with you. Hop on over to Instagram and we'll get you started. Thanks for being here, friends, and I'll talk to you next time.