Let's Play with our Instincts

Do you ever feel like your instincts are "bad" or that you don't have them? Well, you're wrong. 

You're wrong because there is no such thing as a bad instinct nor is there such a thing of a good instinct. And let me also tell you that we all have instincts--we just have to find a way to let them come out naturally. 

But why does Coach Jojo think this is a subject worth talking about in our sport? 

Instincts are EVERYTHING in our sport because playing a sport is fast. You have to make reactions right on the spot and in the moment, but that becomes hard to do when you're thinking about everything.

Thinking about your mechanics, your techniques, whether or not you're going to make the correct play, not to messing up, and playing perfectly. 

Our thoughts are slow and our instincts are fast.

In this episode, Coach Jojo chats about how crucial it is to unlock your inner powers, A.K.A. your instincts. She lets you know that your overthinking thoughts are the reason for why you can't play on the fly, which results in you not playing like yourself.

And who is having fun when they're playing like themselves? Not me! 

The irony of having an instinct is to develop the skill to not think (or overthink for that matter), but it actually does require some thinking in order to develop the skill. Luckily, Coach Jojo provides 3 tools of how to help yourself become a reactor and not an over-thinker. 

1. TRUST your first read

2. TRUST in a word

3. TRUST in your reactions

If you're struggling with playing off of an instinct, this episode will help you unlock your future! (Of course if you also practice and do the work yourself.) 

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

We all know how to define instinct, don't we? Maybe some of you relate it to a gut feeling, which I do agree with, but if I were to define it, I would say it's the reactions you make without having to think twice about. It's a sense of trust that you've created from the experiences you've had over time. So, how do instincts play a role in your sport? More like, how don't instincts play a role in your sport? Well, allow me to explain it to you. In this episode, I'll be talking about what instinct actually is, why you need to trust them, and the reasons you don't trust them. And then I'll tell you how to unlock your instincts. I'm really excited for this episode. So let's get right into it. Welcome to Let's Play, the Mindset Coach for Athletes podcast, where I help athletes build confidence, consistency, and eliminate overthinking thoughts so they can play free and accomplish all that they want. Hit that follow button. And if you want to sign up for one-on-one coaching or team coaching, visit my website with the link in the description. Now let's get into today's Let's Play episode. So let's start off by breaking down what an instinct actually is. Now I did obviously you guys already heard me say my definition of what an instinct is, but then I looked it up and it says an innate, typically fixed pattern of behavior in animals in response to certain stimuli. I found this to be so interesting because obviously we know that every word has a definition, but we also always make our own little spin onto every word. And especially when we're using the word instinct, that could have such a variety of people's opinions and what it means. But it's cool to see like literally what the English language came up with when they were thinking of how to make the word instinct, and it's literally they described it as a behavior in all animals, that it happens to all of us, not just humans, it happens throughout species of and of evolution. And that's why I found it so interesting because we I want to just convince you that we all have instincts no matter what, no matter if we think that our instincts are so-called bad, that we don't have instincts, like we all have them and they actually are good. You just have to know how to let it come out naturally and let it come out the way that it wants to. Because our instincts are, in my opinion, the most powerful thing that we have. It is something having an instinct means that you've been developing experiences over time and they're coming out as a natural reaction. And so when we're in our sport and we are not allowing our natural um experiences to come out, I guess I'm trying to say that when you are naturally experiencing things and you're learning things over time, you're developing a skill and your instincts want to use that skill, but you don't trust that skill. You don't trust your instincts to do something good for you, even though you've done the work and you've experienced it over time. But the main thing I'll say with an instinct is that we don't even want to think about an instinct. We want to feel it. We want to feel that gut feeling. I have always had a hard time with feeling a gut feeling, and not that not that necessarily an instinct is a gut feeling because I think that it's just a reaction, and I think that it is a split second of a gut feeling where you're like, okay, I'm making this reaction right away because that's what my gut's telling me to do. But also a gut feeling, I think, is something that we think about. Like, for example, I am such a bad test taker, and that is my limiting belief. I know that I could definitely say that I'm a good test taker and just be better at it. And but, anyways, that's how I've just always thought in all my years of schooling. So when everybody would tell me, like, use your gut feeling about what the answer is when you don't know what the answer is, I couldn't feel it. I could never feel my gut feeling. And that's because I didn't trust myself. I don't trust that I'm a good test taker. So when people say, oh, just feel that gut feeling of like what you've studied and everything that you know, but I had this limiting belief of like, well, I'm not good at it. So my gut feeling is probably wrong because I'm not good at this skill. And that's a that's an underlying concept, I think, to an instinct. I think that we have to trust what our gut is telling us and actually feel what our gut is telling us, even if we don't think it's there, it's because we don't have any trust that lies within us. But once we could get that foundation, I think that that's when the instincts could come out naturally and that's when we could start playing like ourselves and the experiences that we've had and all of the hard work that we've put in. But now transitioning over and tying this with solely our sport, the most important thing that an instinct could do to us in our sport is make us play like ourselves. When you are able to develop the skill to let your instincts come out the way that they want to, and the thing, the the hard part about it is that you're actually you're going to have to learn to not think about having an instinct. That is the irony of it. And I'm gonna talk about that when we get into tools later on because I know that you're probably thinking, well, how are you gonna give me tools and how am I gonna think in a way where I'm not gonna have to think about my instincts because the whole point of an instinct is to not think. But trust me when I say that I will help you guys with this, and I think that over time it's gonna be an overtime type of thing. It's gonna be something that you have to practice. But we are supposed to be playing with and by our instincts in our sport. That is literally how you're supposed to play a sport. It's what confidence players play with, it's what's consistent players play with, it's what players that trust themselves play with. Everything in your sport comes down to your instincts. And when you don't have that, that's when you're not gonna feel confident, that's when you're not gonna be consistent, that's when you're not gonna have trust in yourself, that's when you're gonna, you know, make more mistakes than you want to. But let me tell you something. Even when you are somebody that's not feeling confident and consistent and you are making a lot of mistakes and you're playing in a bunch of fear, you do have instincts, okay? I want you to know that. And I want you to know that even if you think, okay, yeah, Coach Jojo, I know I have instincts, but they're bad, that's not true. You there's no such thing as bad instincts. And there's no such thing as good instincts. All there is is instincts. And all there is is that the only reason why you say you might have a bad instinct is because it's just not there. That doesn't mean that it's bad. And if you say that, well, yeah, I have a good instinct about test taking, you know, like let's say that you are a school person, that's not a good instinct. That's just you having an instinct. Like that, that's just you. Well, test taking is actually kind of a bad example because that was to the gut feeling. But you know what I'm saying? Like any instinct in any other area of your life, if you know, you are struggling with your sport, maybe you have instincts in other things. But how I know you have instincts is because you have been playing your sport. I don't know how long you've been playing, at least for people who my friends that I've grown up with and seen and played basketball with, we have been playing since we've been five years old. And even if you haven't been playing since you're five years old, even if you've been playing, you know, you started in high school and you've been playing for a couple years. Years, if you have years under your belt, you have instincts to know what to do in your sport. You have knowledge and skills of what to do, how to play, how you play as an individual player, what makes you you, what the value that you could bring to your sport, you have it. It's just not possible for you to work hard and put so much effort in and so much time in and not see those skills come out. And that's because you have issues with your thoughts and issues with your mind. You don't have any issues with your skills. But here's the thing: you know how to do the skills. You have subconsciously, you have done skills where you've put it into your subconscious mind where it's basically a second nature to you. But because you're thinking and overthinking about how you're playing and you can't make a mistake, and then you're playing in fear and you're thinking about what other people are thinking of you, like the coaches and your teammates and the crowd, then that's when all of that hard work is gonna go away. That's when you can't put two and two together. So I think that I'm gonna specifically now name reasons of like why you don't think that you have instincts and why you stop trusting your instincts. And the number one reason I have is that you do have a fear of making mistakes because if you are already in a mindset where you're in a gamer and you're in a you're in a match and you're thinking, okay, well, I can't turn the ball over, or whatever the mistake is in your sport because coach is gonna take me out, or because I'm gonna get embarrassed. And you're just like predicting the future of how you're gonna feel or what's going to happen, and that's gonna make you pause, that's gonna make you analyze everything, like you're sitting there analyzing, and then it's gonna make you hesitate. How in the world are you going to let in sync come to you? How in the world is that going to come out when you're being so analytical and you're being so trying to be so perfect, right? Because if we're not trying to make a mistake, then that means that we are trying to play perfect. And I actually just released a whole episode on that. Let's that's called Let's Play Imperfect. But do you see what I mean? If you're thinking so goddamn much, then there's no gut feeling. There is no instinct that's gonna come out. You're not gonna play like yourself at all because you're trying to play like a player that you have made up in your head, but you have no experience with being that player. Maybe another thing that you do is that you try to overcoach yourself. So you start to say, like, at least for basketball, sorry, another basketball example. But if I'm doing my shooting form and I missed my last shot, which first off, if I missed my last shot, it could have just been, I just missed it. You know, it doesn't always have to be super like we have to think of every single reason that went wrong of why we missed a shot or whatever it is in your sport. But maybe I'm gonna say something like, okay, make sure your elbows in on this or make sure you bend more legs, and I'm just like overcoaching myself when in reality, I could just shoot the next shot and trust my game that I've been practicing for years. I literally am a shooter. I I have shot so many goddamn shots. There shouldn't be a reason why I need to keep correcting myself. I have corrected myself for so many years. And so that's the thing is that when you make a mistake, you just have to know that yes, that's going to happen, but I'm gonna trust my skill, I'm gonna trust my experience, and that's how your instincts are gonna come out. And you're gonna play like yourself if you do that. Because thinking of mechanics instead of playing is being analytical. And we do not want to be analytical. We don't want to, because if we're analytical, then we're overthinking. Overthinking thoughts make us play, you know, without confidence, without consistency, and play in fear. Another reason of why, you know, you feel like you don't have instincts is because you have lost confidence. And I know that maybe if you're saying, Well, yeah, if I don't have confidence and obviously I don't have instinct, but I think that if you are at a point right now where you're just like, Yep, I have no confidence and I have no instincts, then I think that you are gonna be second guessing everything that you're doing. You are going to second guess literally how you're running, how like there are so many things. There's been so many times in my career where when I was not a confident player, I would second guess literally the way that I was moving, the way that I would be, if I was athletic enough, if I and that's a comparison thing. I think that if I look at my teammates running a certain way, or literally that I mean it gets that brutal, but like if you know they're doing, they're shooting a certain way, even though like shooters are different, players, players are all different, and that's what makes you unique. That's what you bring to the table, and that's your value is the player that you are. And so comparison really does not help with that. And obviously, if we're comparing ourselves and we are gonna lose confidence because we're not trusting ourselves and we think that other people are better than us. So that is actually a tool that we could use, and not that I have specifically written down, but just really building your confidence first before building instinct, which is kind of ironic because your instincts will come out if you are trying to build confidence. And of course, I have so many podcasts on how to build confidence, and that's my main purpose as a mindset coach to you guys. And I have so many videos, and you could also sign up for one-on-one coaching with the link in my description. So please do that if you are lacking any confidence in your sport. And then the fourth and final reason that I have where you are going to stop trusting your instincts is if you're predetermining everything that you're doing in your sport. I did this all the time. I just talked about this on my lot, my last podcast that I just mentioned, the let's play imperfect. And I talked about how I am, I was a player where I wanted to predetermine everything I was doing because it made me feel safe. But the thing with feeling safe is that you will feel safe in your sport. The the point of your sport is to never feel safe. You are supposed to experience things, you're supposed to feel good and accomplish things. And if you are accomplishing things, you are never going to just feel safe and comfortable all the time. You're going to feel uncomfortable. But that's why it's so exciting to play a sport. That's why we get so competitive, is because there's this uncertainty. Like we actually, a lot of us, at least we're confident players, we love the uncertainty. We love to play with our instincts. And I think that's hard when you haven't felt that before. Like when I wasn't a confident player, uh, my first two to three years of college, it's hard to even want to play your sport when you don't feel like you have any instincts and you want to analyze everything and you want to predetermine because it feels safe. But once I gained confidence over time at my my last year in college, playing with instinct was like it was just the best feeling ever because you're just out there playing a sport that you love and you're being competitive and you're sharing it with other people. And it's just, it's just a purpose in life, and having purpose in life is so fun. So I hope that when I say this to you, that if you are somebody that predetermines, I really hope that you could stop. No, but like seriously, like don't try to like I use the example where I said that I would used to determine that I was gonna drive to the hoop if I got the ball for my point guard. Like there is no doubt in my mind, like I was gonna go drive to the basket. And then let's say that the defender is right there stopping me. What am I gonna do? Like I already predetermined and I already had this my head set on going to the basket and driving. And now what am I gonna do? I can't play on instinct because I wanted to play with a plan. But we are going to run into things, I say this all the time, where we are not gonna know the path that's going to get us to our outcome. We don't know the journey that it's gonna take, and there's gonna be other obstacles that are gonna get in the way. There's gonna be opportunities that are gonna get in the way, um, and in a good way, right? We want them to get in the way. We want these opportunities to arise when we don't even know that they're coming, and to actually use those from our instincts and play off of opportunities from our instincts because that's gonna feel really good and it's gonna feel natural and it's gonna feel like we're free. I'm just gonna say this because I think that it's really important to know why we make a mistake. And this is if, you know, of course, you don't want to make a mistake, but if you do happen to make a mistake, in most sports, mistakes happen because of late reactions, because of indecision, and because you are slowing down, and you can't do that in a sport. In most sports, you just can't slow down, like you have to react on what's happening right in front of you in that moment. And let me say, the wrong decision made quickly is often better than the right decision made too late. Your instincts are fast, like instincts, that's what they're made for. They're made to be fast and made to be in the reaction of time, and your thoughts are slow. So that's why you're gonna make a mistake, is if you're thinking too much, because that's what thoughts are, they're slow. It's like the same thing as when people say, think before you speak, because you slow down everything. You're able to obviously think about what you're gonna say, and that's not an instinct that applies to our sport too. But it's funny because we want to trust our thoughts more. And I think it's obviously because we're able to analyze, we're able to be like, okay, is this the right decision? Am I making the right decision right now? And our instincts, we aren't thinking about it. That is just something where we're putting ourselves out there and we're hoping that it's gonna go good and or well, and that's scary to us unless you trust your instincts so much. Honestly, trusting your instincts more than trusting your thoughts will serve you so much better. I remember when lit oh my god, I was so young. I'm using an example where I was so young because this still sticks with me to this day. I still will bring this up um to my parents when, or at least when I was playing basketball, I would be like, I remember when my dad told me, because I did struggle with uh working hard as a kid, I was very athletic. So I was able to um rely on my athleticism and kind of just I didn't really ever have to go to individual workouts. I always was able to go to team workouts, and I'm very blessed for that. But it did come to a point where it was like, okay, I gotta start working a little hard if I want to get to the level of uh competition that I want to get to. And so my dad was always, oh my god, both my parents so supportive to me um during my whole entire career. But it came to a point where my dad gently had to tell me, hey, you gotta, you gotta pick it up. Like, you gotta start working hard. And he's like, honestly, I don't even want you to make any three-pointers or any shots. He's like, all I want you to do is just work your ass off in this next game. And whenever my parents would tell me something, obviously I was the type of kid that was like, don't tell me what to do, and I'm gonna do the exact opposite of what you're doing or what you're saying to me. But for some reason, I was like, I kind of had seen in my teammates, and okay, I didn't tell you the age that I was. I was about in eighth grade at this point. So I was pretty young. And I would start to see my teammates, you know, they were working hard too, and they were, I had to do something else other than just score the ball, other than just, you know, get some steals on defense because getting steals on defense does not mean that you work hard necessarily. But I remember taking that advice and just working my ass off. I didn't even care about points, I didn't care about steals, I didn't care about any stat line. I was just like, I'm going after that motherfucking ball, and everybody better watch the fuck out. That game, this is so weird to say because it's like really a game in eighth grade changed your whole career. Literally, that game, I still remember the gym. I literally still remember this one play I made on the baseline where I just played so hard and with all of my instincts, and I didn't second guess anything. I was just like, I'm going out there working as hard as I can. I changed my career forever in that one game. I worked so hard. I created and developed instincts where it was like I worked so hard that I ended up trusting myself that I knew if I worked hard, I was gonna get a good result. I think that that's the only way that we're able to trust ourselves is if we get a good result. So that's why it's sometimes scary to trust ourselves because and we start to overthink and we start to analyze because we want to get a good result, and because we know that that's the only way we're gonna love ourselves, we're gonna accept ourselves, we're gonna value ourselves. And so sometimes all it takes is you just surrendering and you just giving in. And that's actually um now I'm gonna talk about tools because that really gets me into the tools that I have for you guys today. Sorry if I just hurt somebody's ears from hitting my microphone so hard. But okay, let's get into how to unlock your instincts. And the irony of me giving you tools to help your instincts hits kind of hard because technically you're not supposed to do anything to help your instincts, you're actually supposed to. Not do anything. So, with you know, obviously, I've been talking about trust this whole entire podcast. I'm going to give you tools on the basis of trusting yourself because you just you ultimately just need this foundation in order to unlock your instincts. So, tool number one, I'm actually going to say trust yourself. Like literally, I want you to build yourself. I want you to experience things where it's going to make you uncomfortable. Because if you are making yourself uncomfortable and you're making mistakes, then you're learning how to become a better version of yourself and how to become a better player for yourself. And that is what's going to make you trust yourself. You showing up for yourself in the times that are going to be super hard, or even just showing up for yourself when times are easy. Like when you are always showing up for yourself and you're building upon things and you're not bringing yourself down, you're not feeling bad for yourself. That's how you're going to build trust. But this is kind of what I said before I mentioned another big way to trust yourself is by just surrendering. Surrendering, what I mean by surrendering, I read this book on the power of letting go, and it basically talks about surrendering your ego and just surrendering this judgment that you have in your head about yourself and about how others are judging you. Like literally, you're judging how you're being judged by others. But if you are just able to let your ego go, if you're able to, it's so hard because I still struggle with this. I still struggle with having an ego and letting things go. But you will be able to trust yourself because there's not gonna be anything holding you back. There's not gonna be any doubt that's creeping in your head. Number two on the tool list, we have trust. It's all gonna do with trust, you guys. Trust your first read. So I mean this in a sense of your sport. Like literally when you're playing in your sport, think of the first read that you're gonna play on the next play that's coming up right then and there. And so instead of asking yourself, what is the right choice? What is the right thing to do? That's a thought, and your thoughts are slow. So you're already slowing down your whole entire, you're already analyzing everything. So instead, I want you to train yourself to think, commit to the first read, commit to this next play, and just do, just act, just react. And you know what's cool about that too is if you get in that mindset of where you're just like, okay, just react, evaluate yourself afterwards. And actually, that's what I think that we get scared of. I think that's what why we try to analyze everything is because we're trying to avoid the negative emotions that could come with a mistake or come with something that's gonna make us cringe. But that's a skill that we have to develop too is just being okay with feeling negative emotions and knowing that it's okay. Like it's literally not that scary to feel a negative emotion, and obviously it's gonna feel uncomfortable. And I, and guys, this is like my whole entire practice that I try to tell you guys to feel emotions because it's not that scary. And so if we're just going to say, okay, I'm just gonna react and I'm gonna evaluate afterwards, and just to also let myself know it's not gonna be that scary and it's not gonna be that bad, you're gonna so easily be able to have your instincts come out. And then my tool number three I have is to trust in a word that you're going to use. So this could be a word like attack or next play. Honestly, it's kind of what I was saying in tool one, just saying like just react or something. Um, but you could also say just certain words that are specific, more specific than just like react or something, but you could say like compete or whatever you're doing in that exact moment. Like if I were on defense, I would just be like get low or something, you know, like something specific to what you're doing in the moment. And then a tool that I talked about in the last podcast, I said to use the word playable. I think that it gives us a sense of freedom if we're just gonna say, okay, playable. Be playable, don't be perfect, but be playable. That will also make us feel free and make us feel relaxed and make us feel like we are capable, which will make an instinct come out. You could actually also do the most random word ever. Okay, hear me out on this because this is what I say in my free 10-minute meditation audio that is actually on my website. If you go and click on my website, it will pop up and you could sign up and you can get this free 10-minute meditation audio to play before your game. Honestly, you could play but play it before your practice. Um, it's meant for a game, but you could honestly play it whenever. Oh my gosh, sorry, I keep hitting my microphone so hard. Okay. But basically, I say in it to think of such a random word. And I use the word parrot in that one because that's so freaking random. And it can make you thinking of such a random word when you're going to overthink and you're going to start analyzing, could literally make you switch into being present and it could clear your mind. It could make you stop being so, again, like just overthinking everything. And I tried to think of, I tried to do this when I was actually in my career, except I chose a word that was literally I used the word okay, and I would just say it so fast and be like, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. And I would try to like make sure that I would focus on the word okay. The problem with that is that it's very general. Okay, could mean it could be used in a moment of overthinking. So I think that it's good to use a word like parrot, or I don't even know, like, what's another random word? Like lamp. I don't know. I just looked at something in here and use a word, obviously, that's not gonna make you keep overthinking. Like I said, like using okay or using like, I don't know, bull. Like, obviously, you don't want to use bull because it's gonna be tied to your sport, but I would think about parrot, and then I would think about P-A-R-R-O-T. Pear red. Like, I would think about every single pronunciation, think about the syllables, think about how many letters there are in there. Like that is going to make me clear my mind, and it's not distracting at all. At least for me, you could still be present. Think about that word. You're gonna have thoughts no matter what. You might as well think something that's going to be calm and clear your mind. But my fourth and final tool is just trust in your reactions. I know that's something that is so much easier said than done. But of course, I did do a bunch of other tools for you guys, but I will get into this one a little more. React instead of predict. And I did talk about this a little bit, but literally, instinct will develop from experience and not from thinking. Your instincts will not develop if you're thinking about everything. We cannot think from an instinct, or else it wouldn't, you can't call it an instinct if you're thinking, honestly. That's not how it's defined. It's not what I've been talking about on this whole podcast. So I guess it's more of a advice than it is a tool. But I think that it also ties to the tool of saying, you know, think of the word react instead of, you know, other thoughts that you're gonna have and just having a word that's gonna help you in the moment, that's gonna help your instincts come out because they are in there. They're in there, please let them come out. This will take time. If you're somebody that's really, really struggling and doesn't have any confidence, this is going to be something that you're going to have to practice over time. And it's going to be something where I think that you should think about this. You should think about the tools that you're using. Yes, and allow yourself to think because I'm also not trying to tell you guys, don't think, and then you're gonna have an instinct and like don't overthink too much. Like, you're obviously if you're somebody that's going to need to practice this, you will be thinking about it a lot. And that's okay. Let me tell you, it is okay for the first couple weeks, however many weeks it's gonna take for you to gain some confidence. That's okay to be thinking about your instincts. It's so good to have awareness about ourselves and awareness of the power that lies within us first, and then we could realize that it's going to come naturally. You will develop this skill. You will learn how instincts are going to come about and how they're gonna come, they're gonna start coming out in ways that you're like, wait, I didn't even realize that that was an instinct, and you're gonna have to reevaluate after practice, maybe or after a game, and you're gonna be like, wait, I just had, I had so many instincts, I didn't even realize that I was having these things that were happening to me and I was reacting off of them. And I think that over time there has to be a point, right? You're gonna practice this skill. Over time, there's gonna be a point where you're gonna have to stop thinking so much. You're gonna have to be like, okay, I use Coach Jojo's tools, I listen to her podcasts, like it's helping me. This week, I'm just going to trust now. I'm going to trust everything that I've been developing. And I know that I've been working really hard and that it's in my brain. Also, we don't necessarily, I know that practice, especially for an athlete, helps us so much feel so much more secure in the things that we're doing and accomplishing. But you guys, our brain is so powerful that if you just tell yourself right now, yes, I trust myself, I trust myself, I trust myself over and over and over again, and you get it into your subconscious mind, that's all the practice that you need to do. That's literally, I know I say that you need a lot of experience for things. Experience you doing affirmations for yourself about trusting yourself. And I promise you, if you just believe, oh my God, if you literally just believe that you have instinct and it's coming out because you trust yourself, it will be there. But you have to surrender. You actually have to give in. You actually have to give this all that you can and trust all that you can in order for all of this to work, in order for your instincts to come. But that's all that I have for you guys today. Thank you so much for listening. Thank yourselves for listening. And I hope that your instincts are coming out this week, next week, tomorrow. I don't know when they're gonna come out, but please, I would love to know if you guys were struggling with this. Um, please let me know by DMing me, by contacting me on my website. That is the link in the description. And please follow me on my podcast, follow me on my social media pages so that I can keep posting free content for you guys. I love you guys, and let's play confident, let's play consistently, let's play with and let's play with our instincts. Bye.