Let's Play Without Comparison

Do you compare yourself to your teammates? To an opponent? To yourself?

Comparison is toxic to our mind when we play our sport because we end up putting more pressure on ourselves...

Am I on the same timeline as everyone else? Am I worse than I was last season? When will I be better than the player coach is playing over me? 

In today's episode, Coach Jojo breaks down why comparison is one of the biggest issues of why you aren't excelling in your sport. 

As much as you might think comparing yourself is helping you out, it's actually setting you further back. Maybe you think that it's motivating you to work harder, but Jojo will tell you that the comparison mindset will create so many extra negative emotions. 

Comparison creates guilt, enyy, and jealously and we never want to play with those emotions when we can avoid that. 

Not only will Coach Jojo explain why comparison is a mindset you need to get out of, she also provides you 3 tools of how to help train your mind to not compare:

1. Journal your limiting beliefs 

2. Back to Me Method

3. Become grateful (realization)

Give this podcast a listen if you even remotely find yourself feeling behind from others, feeling envious, or like you're out of some control with yourself. This podcast will help you with that!

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Do you think in your sport you compare yourself to other players, whether or not that is your teammate, or if that's an opponent, or do you compare yourself to yourself? Comparing is our kryptonite in our sport. We cannot do this. And that is what I'm going to be talking about today. In today's episode, I'm going to be explaining and trying to get into your mind and have something click about why comparison is so bad for us and why we need to fix it, how we're going to fix it. I, of course, provide tools like I do in every single podcast episode at the end, but I could already feel myself wanting to yap right now. So let's get right into it. So why do we compare? Why do we compare ourselves to another player when we are ourselves and we are in our bodies and we are bringing the value that we bring? Why do we still want to compare ourselves to other players? Well, it's funny because we don't just compare ourselves in our sport, not at all. We compare ourselves in every aspect of our life. And the reason why we do that is because humans want to connect with one another. And by connecting with one another, that means that we are seeing what other people are doing and we have to see what they like to do. And you know, this is an in general sense of life. Because I think that every single thing that I talk about in a sport happens in your life. And life is meant to be lived the way that we want to live it, to be happy, to feel fulfillment, to have a purpose in life and to have goals. And I think, and if we have goals, that means that we do have a purpose and that we're working towards something, and that's all life is about. And that's why playing a sport is so awesome because it teaches us so many things that we could use in our life, but also things that we're doing in our life are happening in our sport. So it goes both ways. But when we're in life and we're with our friends and we want to make connections with other people, we want to be most liked and you know, things like that, we are looking for cues of how to please somebody because we want to connect with them, and that's what the reason why we want to be liked. And, you know, that's there's nothing wrong with that. I think that human human connection is the reason why it determines whether or not you're going to be happy in life. And so wanting that and wanting to please somebody and you know, feeling nervous or feeling anxious to get judged is so normal. That's just being a human being. So, with that being said, it transfers over to our sport. Being human in our sport is really there's a lack of identity that happens, and you guys are not really realizing that. I mean, a lot of you, I can't just speak for everybody, but I know that at least for me too, and the experience that I've had with people on my calls is that you try yourself to being such an athlete and thinking only in an athlete mindset. And an athlete mindset could be something like you have so much grit and you have so, you know, you work super hard, and there's such great qualities to being an athlete. And, you know, maybe things like you're on schedule, like you're on time for everything, you have a schedule, and you know, you work, it's just like you're just working super hard. Being an athlete is another type of level. And I think that when we are telling ourselves that we're on this different type of level than other people because athletes are so much better, we do say that to ourselves. We do say athletes are on this different level than everybody else. And it's true, it's true, but then that's when we could lose our identity and that's when we could tie our value to playing a sport. But what I will also say that yes, you get so many freaking great qualities out of being an athlete and it's going to transfer over to your life. Say that all the time. But also, if you don't coach yourself correctly, because it's coaching, you're coaching yourself every single day. If you don't do it correctly and you don't do it with good behaviors, and you don't do, you know, if you cross that fine line, there are some bad qualities that you could pick up with yourself and if you don't have them balanced, and those are things like feeling like you're less than other people because you're not as good at your sport as somebody else, or you're in your head, right? I think that we all have different, we all bring different abilities, different values to our sport. And yes, maybe you play the same position as somebody, so you compare yourself to their position, but you are bringing your own game and that makes you you. That makes you the player that you are. That's the reason why you got recruited on the team. And so maybe you're just feeling lots of pressure, and maybe you're making mistakes that you don't want to because you're trying to play perfectly. And again, I have all kinds of episodes on these things and how to fix those little uh things that are going wrong in your head. So if you don't manage your mind right, then you are going to pick up bad qualities in your sport. And that's what brings me to the topic today about comparing yourself and picking up a quality where, again, we're okay, we're going to compare ourselves. That is something that humans being do. It's how we want to fit in. But especially in a sport, you want to fit in because you want your coach to play you, you want your teammates to like you, you want your teammates to pass you the ball, you want, you know, your coach to have a good relationship, you want to be the favorite on the team. And that makes complete sense. Who doesn't want to be liked? Who doesn't want all of these perks? But if you are comparing yourself, that is one of the bad qualities that you're gonna pick up in your sport, and that is what's going to make you spiral. That is what's going to make you overthink. That is going to give you so many bad thoughts. You're going to start playing in fear. And if we're playing in fear, like I always, always say, we're not going to play like ourselves because there's so much pressure in our head. And let me first say, before I get into more about talking why comparison is not good in your sport, I will say there is obviously with everything you do, you could take a bit of a risk with things if you have good control over it. And what I mean by that is that I'm going to name an example of when I remember I went into my coach's office my sophomore year, and I thought that I was better than this other player that was getting time over me. So I just went in asking my coach, hey, I want to know like what I'm doing that's not as good as her, or you know, and I'm going in, comparing myself. I am. But I think that, you know, I was asking because my numbers were better, and I thought that I was playing harder than her. And so I asked, like, why am I not getting more time? I think that that he did tell me my coach was like, don't compare yourself to other people, blah, blah, blah, whatever. But honestly, honestly, I think that that instance is okay because you're saying, I see my value, and you're not, you're not putting yourself down. You know, like you're not putting, you're not comparing yourself and being like, oh, she's so much better than me. I have to work harder, I have to do this, and you're feeling guilty. I, in that sense, in that example, I felt like I was the better player and that I should be getting time. So I did something about it and I spoke up about it. And I think that that is the only time you're allowed to compare yourself. And that wasn't even me intentionally comparing myself. That's just me being like, I deserve to be playing out there. I want to have time. And the only way that I'm gonna do that, honestly, is to see who I gotta beat right now. And that is comparing. And we're gonna talk about the fine line of when you can compare and when you can't. I mean, I did just give an example of when you can compare, but they're also, and I said that that's the only way and only reason where you can, but you could push a little bit more of a limit that I'll talk about in a second. But let's just, I really want to get into your guys' head for the people that do compare. I really want to get into your head why comparing is so bad. And honestly, there's a lot of things that you could do wrong that you could really mess up your mind and you um could be in a really bad mindset and you're not managing your mind well. There's a lot of reasons I could come with that. But I think the biggest one, especially if you're playing a team sport, this is more I'm gonna talk about comparison about your other teammates, because if you're comparing yourself to an opponent, I think that that's competitive. Like that's that's like you are fired up to beat that other opponent. And I think that you know in your head that you have a capability to beat them, that you have to get into the gym, you have to get on the field, you have to be better than them. That's competitiveness. There's that's another difference of when it's okay to compare yourself against another opponent because that fires you up, that makes you want to work hard and achieve something that's better than what they can't achieve. But when we're talking about teammates, that's when comparison can get really, really bad. And so the reason why it could get so bad is because you let's say you're somebody that is coming off the bench right now and you're comparing yourself to a starter. That is so normal. You are so allowed to do that, but you cannot let it consume yourself. Just like an opponent, you could say, I'm gonna work so hard that I am going to get so much better than my teammate, but but I have so much respect for my teammate, and I am not going to, you know, be a bad friend or a bad teammate because I have no control over. Sorry, am I saying her, him or her, whoever's listening, whatever um gender you are. Because when we're when we're comparing ourselves to our teammates, and then we start to low key not like them because they're better than us. So we have like this envy for them, that should never happen. You should never have envy for somebody else, especially even if you think you are better than that player, even if you think that you are better than your teammate, you should be getting time. That's not their fault. The coach is the person who controls their playing time. You should not ever get mad at your teammate for playing more than you or getting minutes, even if you think you're better than them. I listened to this podcast the other day and it talked about jealousy, and it talked about why we get jealous. And the reason what what she named, I forgot her name in the podcast. She was amazing, though. She was like this neuroscientist, and she talks about um, you know, all of the brain and the psychology of the brain. And she thinks that the reason why we get jealous is because it's when we can't have something, when we know we can't have something, we get jealous of it because we think that we're incapable to have it. Again, though, not again. Sorry, I don't think I've ever said this before, but I say this in my head all the time. So I say again, you could achieve anything you want to, and you are capable of anything that anybody else is capable of. I'm reading this book, it's called Limitless, and I talked about it in another episode, but it talks about how our brains are capable of doing, it's like our brains are capable of doing anything it wants to. And you know, like I talked about being a bad test taker. I think that was the last podcast, and that's just my limiting belief. When you have a limiting belief of that you're not capable of doing something because you're like, well, that person's just really smart, and they are a better test taker than me, and they just like know how to answer questions like whatever. Like that's the example that I'm using. Um, you are limiting yourself thinking that you can't do that when your brain has the capacity. We, all of our brains have the capacity to achieve anything that it wants to, to learn anything that it wants to. But if you don't think that's true, you have so many limiting beliefs. And I want you to actually, if you have time to, I want you to pull out your journal and write down every limiting belief that you have. A limiting belief is basically you are limiting yourself of believing that you are capable of doing something, of achieving something. So, like with my test taking example, I would talk about, I would write down, I believe my limiting belief is that I'm not a good test taker. That is not true. That is my opinion, but we have to believe that our brainer is capable of doing whatever it wants to and learning whatever it wants to. We can learn so many things. And I think that when we think of a process of learning, because school has messed up a lot of us. But I think that, you know, going through school is boring and going through school is sometimes hard. And if you fail too many times, you fail the class, which is just not realistic, especially when you're playing a sport. You could fail so, so many times. Michael Jordan has, I'm using a basketball guy, but everybody knows Michael Jordan, who plays a sport. He has made, you know, shots at the buzzer and has won the game for his team a few times. But you know the amount of shots that he's missed for his team, the amount of failures that he's had, but he's looked at as this amazing athlete because the achieving things is way more satisfying, way more, you get so much more success and results out of a win than you do a loss. And I'm talking about all of this because when you're comparing yourself to somebody, you are limiting your belief and you have jealousy towards them. And if you are able to flip your mind to say, to just to say, I could do whatever they could do and I could do it better. If you allow yourself to be free in your mind and you say that, do you understand? I don't even think you guys have to understand how powerful that is for you. And to not only say that, but also to not be afraid to fail. When we're playing a sport, there is going to be so, so much failure. But you're still playing your sport, and you know why? Because of that success. So comparing is tied with jealousy. And when we're jealous, that means that we think that we're not able, that's what I believe now. Ever since I heard that on the podcast, I was like, that's exactly why I think that I'm jealous, is because I think that I can't get what they have. There are certain scenarios though, where you know, you think that the coach is playing them and maybe they're a favorite, and that's why they're playing them, and you have no idea why they're playing them, and you think that you are better. I totally get why you're comparing, but make it a fucking goal to go out and be so much better than that and be like just a super coachable kid. And again, I know there's instances where I mean, I've been in that position where I've done everything that I could. I've been the most coachable, I've been the hardest worker, I've, you know, won the most drills. And the coach didn't, didn't like me. But let me tell you that if you are in that position right now, that does not happen on every team. And I didn't believe that. I was literally gonna quit my sport, my sophomore year, and I was like, it's just gonna be like this everywhere else. Like this just division one, this is what happens. And I transferred and it just it made me love my sport again. So that's a whole nother topic. Um, and very specific topic. And I know that you guys are some of you might be struggling with that, but I'm gonna talk about the people who are comparing themselves because they are jealous. And maybe you're somebody too that is a starter, and maybe you have a spot, and maybe you are on that scale of being a favorite of the coach's um favorite. I didn't really say that correctly, but maybe you are somebody like that and you want to be better, and you just are comparing yourself to maybe somebody else on the team plays a different position than you, but they are doing better than you, and that still you're comparing yourself and you're getting jealous. That's also totally normal, but we have to channel that energy into making it not where you're being envious, but where you're fired up to compete with your teammates and not even against your teammates, with your teammates. You want to be on the same page as your teammates. You want to achieve the same thing that you're doing with your teammates, and yeah, maybe you want to be the best. But another thing that we have to think about with being on a team is that we are all there to win at a team sport. We're not there for stats. And I know for some of you, if you are in high school, you're like, well, I'm there for stats because I need to go to college and I need to, you know, people need to look at me and I want to go to a really high college and I want to go division one. Or if you're at, you know, division one, you're at division two. Well, if you're at division two or a JUCO, then you're probably like, well, I need stats so I could get to division one. And if you're at division one, you're probably wanting to go overseas, or you're probably, you know, wanting to go to WNBA, whatever, or sorry, whatever I always get tied to basketball, but you know, whatever that is, going pro. And I get that. I get that you're like, I gotta have stats. But another thing is that your impact as a teammate and as a player, and if you're staying in your lane where you are just going to contribute to the team and you're not comparing yourself and you're not, you know, thinking of a scale, you're not thinking about what who the coach has as a favorite, you're gonna not only free up your mind, but you're also just going to become a better player because you're in a selfless type of mindset. Being in a selfless type of mindset, I have a podcast on let's play as a good teammate. I think you get, I think everybody should listen to that podcast episode, even though I know some people are like, well, I'm already a good teammate. I don't have to listen to this. I think it's going to open up your eyes to a lot of things because we don't realize that being selfless literally gives us what we want. So it's almost like selfishly, we get what we want. Being unselfish. Unselfless, unself, I got it, guys. I got it. Unselfish. But I hope that we realize that comparing ourselves is putting pressure on us. And my whole entire practice is about, or my whole entire like why I'm helping you guys is to get rid of that pressure and to make you feel free and have a confident mindset. You're never, you're never going to have a confident mindset if you're thinking about somebody else. Never. It's just like in life. If you are wanting to have, let's say that you are wanting to be in this one friend group, and so you're comparing yourself to how they act and how they dress. And am I, is my body good enough for them? At least for a woman, that's what we think about. And like, am I like good enough for them and comparing yourself to another girl that's there? You are going to attract people in your life that you're not going to want to attract and going to want to be friends with. And overall, you're just not going to end up happy. So, just like in a sport, when you're comparing yourself to your teammates, which I think is just the most common scenario, I think that you are just ultimately not a happy person with yourself because you think that you cannot get what they have or what they have worked hard for. And not that you're not working hard. I know you guys are working hard, but they are doing things. Maybe their mindset, this is what I always say. This is also my entire practice. You could physically do things. You could physically go out there, work your ass off in the gym, work your ass off on that field, getting extra time, working harder than everybody else, but your mind is not connected with your body. Your mind has all of this noise in it and is overthinking and has pressure and all this fear. And that is what's stopping you from being the player that you are. And maybe that's why somebody else is playing better than you because they have cleared their mind. They have managed their mind. Of course, that's what I offer with my one-on-one coaching. If you guys get on call with me, I have had so many of my clients, oh, it's been amazing too, because I've started up a lot more. And they have within two weeks, two weeks, which is two calls with them, they have come back and they're like, I feel confident again. I I don't know how you did it. But I I mean, you know, not all credit to me. You guys are doing it too. I'm just saying that like this is you guys need one thing that's gonna click. And maybe I'm gonna just reach in your brain. I'm gonna get around in there and I'm gonna pull out one thing. And within the short amount of time, you're gonna be like, that's all I had to do. And I'm gonna be like, Yes, I just made I'm here to make you realize that. It's these limiting beliefs that we put in our minds. It's crazy. It's just it alters everything that we do. We have the capabilities to do everything we want to do. We physically, we have been playing our sport for so many years. We physically know what to do. We just have to manage our mind. And one way to not manage our mind is by comparing ourselves and getting in our head and overthinking way too much. So now let's get into tools. Let me help you guys out. All right, so for tool number one, this one, I usually don't do this. I usually do, and I I have tools for you guys to use in uh person, in the moment, in the present moment, but I usually do that, and I usually don't give you guys like, I guess this is like a homework assignment. But whenever we hear the word homework, we're like, uh, school. So don't think of whenever I say homework, this is good. This is so good for your mind. This is so good for every aspect of your life. So I'm just gonna say, tool number one, honestly, is what I said earlier in this podcast is to literally get out a journal and it's gonna take you, oh my God, it's gonna take you five minutes, maybe not even five minutes, to just write down every limiting belief that you have in your sport. And what this is going to do is that it's gonna make you see, you're gonna write down things that you didn't think that you Had limiting beliefs about. But it's so good to understand yourself and to get in your brain and to rewire your brain because you're getting all these thoughts out. And when you see it on a piece of paper and you're actually like, wait, I'm managing my mind. Oh, this is so much easier to do when I see it on paper and actually taking the time for myself. You're going to just be so free from this one exercise. I literally think. So let's let's call it an exercise. Tool number one is the exercise of, inside of homework, an exercise of writing down your limiting beliefs. And then I want you to, maybe this is going to take another five minutes, whatever. Then I want you to say how you're going to start to believe that you are capable of that limiting belief. For example, let's say, let me think of something that I did in my basketball career where I had a limiting belief. And I had a lot. I had, I say this all the time. I had struggled with my confidence and being a player and seeing my value for three years of my college career. And my last year, I was able to break through all of those things. And so a limiting belief, this is so funny, but a limiting belief I had was that I was not a shooter. And it was really weird. And it's not like, I mean, I did say that from time to time, and you know, it drove my coach crazy because I actually could shoot, but because I believed that I couldn't and that I needed to, you know, not take a dribble to shoot or something, whatever. Um, it totally altered the way that I played. And so luckily he instilled confidence in me and just was like, you could shoot, you could shoot, you could shoot. And that's another thing you could do. You could write down affirmations of just being like, I am a shooter, whatever it is in your sport, obviously. But I actually used to do that. I used to write down I am a shooter like 25 times a day. And it became, it made me become a better shooter. And of course, my coach helped me with that. And so maybe if you have an accountability partner too, to just make sure that you're, you know, they're just instilling confidence in you and you hearing that over and over again is going to make you get it into your subconscious mind. But let's say for the exercise that we're doing, that I write down my limiting belief is that I don't think that I could shoot 42%, whatever. I am going to write down all the ways that I think that I could achieve that. And honestly, you guys, yeah, it doesn't have to be I go into the gym and I get up a thousand shots. No, it could literally be as simple as me turning on a manifestation video at night and manifesting that I am a shooter and that I believe it. If you just change your mindset that you could believe that you could do something, you could fucking do it. All right, tool number two. I didn't really talk about um control and taking your own control back in that I say this all the time. I actually I say this, I say this all the time, but I do, and I just, you know, I repeat myself a lot because I believe that what I say is super simple, and I want to make sure that I say it all the time because simple things go right over our head, but you cannot control what other people do, act, and how they react. You can only control what you do, how you act, and how you react. So I think for tool number two, I want it to be a control tool. I want you guys to be able to feel control in yourself and not control others. And so we're gonna, I'm gonna call this the back to me tool. So you're actually gonna have to be very aware of when you are controlling, I mean, not controlling when you are comparing yourself. And so you're gonna have to, and it's gonna be, it's gonna take practice because I don't think that a lot of us realize that we're comparing. And honestly, when I'm thinking about making this episode, I'm like, oh my God, I compared so much in my college career and I didn't even realize it. And so maybe just an awareness of you being more present and you being like, okay, why am I feeling guilty right now? Why am I feeling shitty? And it's probably because you're thinking about somebody else, and maybe not, but you know, that's probably it a lot of the time. But you're just going to try to recognize this, and then you're gonna say, back to me, and you're going to say only I sentences. So you're gonna be like, What do I need to do right now? What do I need right now? What is my job right now, right? Or I or my anything to do with your perspective, and it's always gonna be like, What can I control right now? What is my responsibility? It's going to keep you in your lane and get out of somebody else's lane. Just mind your business. You are doing you, you don't need to compare yourself to others. You are the reason why you're on the team. You bring so much value on your own. That thank God you're not somebody else. Thank fucking God. They wouldn't have made this team without you on it. And they probably wouldn't have, if you didn't play like yourself, you literally would not have a spot on the team because it just wouldn't work. You wouldn't work on that team. You bring so much other things to your sport and on that team that that's why you're on the team. And I'm trying to say in a different way for you guys to realize, but like you have responsibilities and jobs, and your teammate has responsibility and jobs, and you can't make up the team without those different aspects and values. I think it's also really good to know, like to just change your sentences a lot. And I think, or not even a lot, but like a little bit, you're changing your sentences. So, like, maybe sometimes you're thinking, and this goes to tool two, too, just if you, you know, find yourself, if you are very good at getting and acknowledging that you are comparing yourself. I think that if you say something like, Oh, she's so much better, or he's so much better at this than me, and why can he or she do this, but I can't, maybe be like change into like a more positive perspective of being like, Well, what can I do right now? And how could I get better at that move? And why am I so envious of this? And just really asking yourself, just it's kind of like doing the journaling prompt too. Like, how are you think of the thoughts? Think of the comparison that you're doing in that moment. And then maybe you could even write it down after practice or after the game and be like, okay, why was I jealous today? What can I do in order to get me to achieve what this other player is achieving? And how could I do it better than them? And I always, I always love to do like what purpose is this giving me? Like, what is this sign? Like, if somebody, if I'm having a bad practice, I would a lot of times I would be like, okay, but how is this good? How is this going to how can I learn from this? And like, why is this so good for me? Because when you have a bad bad practice, there is always something you can learn from. Even if you have a good practice or a good game, you could still learn something from that. But I think we have to take our failures and we have to magnify them. We have to actually acknowledge them and then we have to use it and actually get something out of it and work on it, work on whatever skill you want to work on and learn from it. When you're learning from it, you're developing more skills. Oh my gosh, I just thought about something and I didn't think about talking about comparing yourself to yourself. Oh my god. I do this every day of my life without a sport. I compare myself to my past self. This is something, oh my God, I wish I talked about this earlier, and because I already am getting into tools, but I do want to touch on this a little bit. Comparing yourself to yourself is probably even more dangerous than you comparing yourself to another player. God, I'm so mad at myself right now, but but let me just talk about it. I think that there are going to be seasons where you're gonna play your sport and you're going to not even compare yourself to other players and saying, like, well, I'm gonna be better than them this season. You're comparing yourself to playing better than you did last season because you are putting so much pressure on yourself. You are saying to yourself, Well, I've been working so much harder and I'm growing, and you know, I'm becoming a junior to a senior. It's my senior year, and I should be the best that I could be because that's what makes sense. That's what people say. You putting that pressure on yourself is actually going to make you play worse. And it's gonna make you play worse because you're going to start altering your game to play like something that you're not used to because you want to be better. And then it's also going to, when you put pressure on yourself, that means that you might be trying to avoid mistakes or you're trying to do more than you know you're capable of, and like, or things that you haven't tried out before is what I mean, and like you haven't experienced yet, which I think that you guys should always experience things and always like have risks and you know, risk a failure and risk a good moment because that's what a sport is and that's being you know competitive. But also that means that you're probably going to start playing in some fear because you don't want to make mistakes and you don't want to be the player that you used to be. And yeah, maybe you're not even somebody that had a good season, you know, last season. Maybe you're somebody that had a bad season. You're like, this is my season now. People have graduated, and this is my time to shine. Like coach is looking at me now, or whatever it is. And or maybe there's just so many examples, but you cannot do this. You cannot put yourself through this torture of wanting to be better. And there's nothing wrong with wanting to be better, but there is something wrong with that fine line I talk about all the time. If you're crossing that line of not managing your mind while being competitive, because competitive is an amazing feeling. But if you're too competitive, you feel if you get too wrapped up in something, then that's when it's gonna take control over your mind and you're not gonna be able to manage your mind. But I actually, the only reason why I thought of this is because I usually, when I do my podcast, I I used to actually like script out everything because I was like, oh, I'm gonna talk about this and this and this and this, whatever. And then I got to the point where my notes got kind of like slimmer, slimmer. And now I just rip, I just do whatever I'm I know what I'm gonna talk about now, and I'm so I'm so passionate about what I talk about. And you know, I when I talk to you guys, my athletes that I do one-on-one coaching with, so many topics come up that I'm like, oh, I'm just gonna talk about that. And you know, like when you are so honest with me and give me so many ideas, and you guys obviously have commented on my social media pages too, and that's great. Um, it gives me ideas and it makes me like just literally talk off of whatever and I yip yap about anything. But anyways, I say that because I was coming up with tools on the spot right now, and I was like, oh my god, you guys need a tool if you're comparing yourself in the moment and you're saying things like, oh, I'm not as good as I was in the game yesterday, or even like I was saying, I was just saying like seasons, but honestly, if you guys are comparing yourself to last game, that's also super hard. Um, I think that that is a thought that we have so much. I compared myself with myself more than I compared myself with other people. And that's just I think that's an athlete thing. I think that that happens now, post being athlete right now. I am always, and it's good. I think it's good to compete against yours against yourself, but again, there's that fine line. But maybe you're saying something like, I'm not as good as I used to be, or I'm not as good as I was two weeks ago, and like I was better at practice. I don't know what's happening, and I'm behind, and you know, like I'm behind on who I was. This is where we actually have to find things where you are doing right and what you are doing right, because of course we have to look at the positive more than we're looking at the negative. We have to always see how far we've come, not how far we have left. And I think that especially if you've been listening to my podcast and my videos or you've done one-on-one coaching with me, you are going to be able to pick out things where you realize that there are positives and you're doing things better and you're managing your mind better. And so maybe you're gonna say things like, Well, I'm being more aggressive than I used to be. I'm caring more than I used to. And, you know, maybe you're saying something like, whatever you are that's going to point it out, point it out. And maybe you're gonna say something like, I recover from mistakes faster and I've been more consistent at practice. Like, find something. And I know maybe you guys are like, Well, I haven't been consistent. I don't recover, and I haven't been more aggressive. Well, maybe change that. Maybe find you could always be more aggressive. You could always um work hard, you could always have a hard work ethic. That is something in our control. And when you could find stuff where it's in your control, that's when you're going to be able to develop skills that are come easier to you and where your mind's gonna be more free. I have podcasts actually talking about that and talking about how we could control what we could control and not control what we can't control. Overall, I could give so many tools, but they're gonna be along the same lines. And it's always just gonna be you being so grateful for where you've come now and where and being so positive and finding the positive things that you've done and how you no matter what, if you're playing over time, yes, you have gotten better. You have gotten better in some way, and whether or not you think that you have, maybe you know, in basketball, maybe you are shooting worse than you were the next season. That's what I that's what happened to me. I was shooting worse, and of course I was thinking, well, how could I shoot better? But you know what else got better? My driving got better, my defense got better, like other things got better. And so maybe that's just because I wasn't focusing on something else. And we just have to understand our brain, we have to understand our mind, we have to understand those mental blocks. And of course, I help with anybody on that, with any athlete, I help you with those mental blocks and why you're stuck in certain aspects, right? But you could always find something positive, something where you're growing, something where you're maturing. Like even if you're saying, well, yeah, I'm not really good at this skill right now, but I could definitely get better at it again. And I have the capacity to know that I can learn things with my mind again and I could get better at this skill again. You always have the capacity and the capability to do whatever you want to do. But with that being said, that is all that I have for you guys today. Thank you so much for listening and thank yourselves for listening and taking the time for yourself. I hope that this podcast served you well, and please give me a follow. It helps me out to keep creating free content for you guys, as well as on my social media pages. Don't forget to look at my links in the description because they will help you describe it to go to my website. My website will serve you some sort of one. But I love you guys so much, and stay tuned for my next week's podcast. Let's do another podcast, help yourself out. I'm here to help you listen to like today.