Episode 7: When You're Pushing Your Edges: Creation, Rejection, and Coming Back to Yourself

This week Lisa and Desi get into the messy, beautiful, uncomfortable truth of creating something new — whether that's a business, a relationship, a new version of yourself, or all of the above. What comes up when you start pushing your edges? Everything that's been waiting to be seen.

Desi gets real about the fear of rejection, her inner child work, and what happens when you're running an online event, detoxing from sugar, and hitting burnout all at the same time. Lisa holds space, they do a live "feeler" together, and they talk about what it actually looks like to honor yourself even when it feels like letting people down.

In this episode:

• Why creation always brings up your unhealed parts (on purpose)
• Inner child work and the fiction we write when someone might say no
• What a "feeler" is and how to use it with the people in your life (outline below!)
• Energy, vibration, and how you show up in everything you do
• Micro practices to get back into alignment on hard days
• Desi's upcoming free event: Little Girl, Big Healing (June 14–26)

Growth doesn't happen in the comfort zone — and neither does this podcast. Come be human with us.

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The "Feeler" Practice A structured space for someone to fully feel their emotions and be witnessed without response or advice.

How It Works

One person asks for a "feeler" — the other agrees to hold space. The holder's only job is to be present, not to respond, fix, or advise.

Setting the Container

• Take a few breaths together to arrive and settle
• The holder sets a timer for 2–5 minutes based on what is needed
• The space should feel safe, supportive, and loving — no interruptions, no reactions

The Feels / Expressing emotions freely

• Timer starts — the person speaks freely on whatever they're feeling or thinking
• No filtering, no performance — just full expression
• The holder stays present and silent, offering their energy as support

Closing the Loop

• When the timer goes off, the holder asks: "Do you feel complete?"
• If yes → close with a few grounding breaths together
• If no → extend for another 2–3 minutes if possible, then close with breath

Let us know if you try the practice or reach out if you would like for one of us to support you in the practice! 

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Join Desi's FREE LIVE Event! Sign up here!! (6/14-6/26)

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Leave a rating or review for the podcast and get entered to win:
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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:01

Hey y'all, this is Desi. And this is Lisa. Welcome to our podcast, Real Talk Real Healing, where we support women through their healing journey.

SPEAKER_01 0:10

Through raw stories, authentic dialogue, and uncomfortable but very necessary conversations, we explore the full range of emotions, energetic, spirituality, and physical well-being that come with being human.

SPEAKER_00 0:21

We believe in a world filled with filters and surface-level messages that healing begins with truth and a little bit of magic. Yeah. Welcome back to another episode of Real Talk Real Healing with Lisa and Desi. We are excited to come into a topic that we just put together because this is what this episode and this podcast is all about. It's about leaning into what is real and true for us right now because that's exactly the conversations we want to keep having. And if you've been here with us so far, you know that we are having processes we're going through in real time for this podcast. And that's what we want to bring to the table for you guys to see yourself and whatever situation we're going through and to be more relatable and know that again, you don't have to do this alone. This is a human experience we're all having. There's no handbook. And today we get to talk about a little bit of our entrepreneurship journey. And again, even though it's entrepreneurship for us, because we both have business, we're both exploring new things, it could still mean something to you. You can still relate to this. So today's topic is more about creation. And it is in the relationship for us, entrepreneurship, because we're stepping into creating our businesses in a certain way and expanding and pushing ourselves to those edges, which means that we're creating a new version of ourselves. We're asking ourselves to become this new version that holds this vision that we've had for ourselves. So we're stepping in. And guess what? We're getting a lot of um uncomfortability over here. We're getting into some vulnerable, touchy parts of ourselves that is really getting out of our comfort zone because we know that when you're staying in our comfort zone, you're not growing. And so entrepreneurship for real is a big spiritual journey because you're constantly learning new parts about yourself and new things because you're dealing with more than one aspect when you have a business and when you have these ideas that you want to put out into the world. It is definitely not the, you know, quote unquote easy route when you just have a job and you know that's all. You're you clock in and you clock out. We think of this stuff all the time. And this could also pertain to you if you do have a 95. This could also pertain to you if you are becoming, you know, in a new relationship or becoming a parent or you know, stepping into a promotion at work. This could mean different versions of you. And that's really what this is all about. It's about finding this new level of yourself, whatever version and phase of life that you're currently in. And it could be a creation of some sort, right? You're you're learning at different parts of yourself, you're creating a new normal for yourself. And for us specifically, we are learning and leaning into our intuition even more because we're creating something that no one's created before. It's literally from our own mind. And it brings up so much for us because we, of course, have the emotions, new emotions, and we have doubt, we have worries, we have edges that we're literally bumming up to of like, can we actually freaking do this? Like this podcast, hello. No one, you know, no one, this is new still, like out there, you know. Like people obviously are doing it, but it's like, how the hell do they do it? Like, how did we figure this out? Like, we have you when you have a passion, when you have a desire of some sort, you have to learn the basics. You have to learn and trust yourself and keep coming back to that confidence piece and reminding yourself that you are worth it, reminding yourself that you can do this. And that's one of our mentors, you know, saying is like, I persist until I succeed, and you can do this, like I can freaking do this, and that's what we're reminding you as well today on this episode. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 4:11

So good. And so, as we were coming together to record a podcast today, we had something totally planned out. It was very different, and I woke up feeling very tired, a little overwhelmed, but more or less, I think it was more burnout for me that I was hitting this morning. And like Lisa was saying, we're pushing our edges a lot. And so anything you do in your life that is uncomfortable, starting a new job, starting a relationship, having to set boundaries, starting to go to the gym, eating healthy, all of that is going to push edges that you are not familiar with when you are doing something new. So there's really no way around that when we are going into something new. And so Lisa and I are currently in a 12-month mentorship together, which is so fun as we're building out our businesses and growing. And so this particular mentorship that we're in is teaching us how to run an online event. And part of that online event is asking for others to come in and speak and be a part of it and give their gifts and show up and do a little promotion. And it's been a little triggering for me. So there's this part of me that feels like she wants everybody to always love her, always like her, never say no to her, always be down. And I know that I have this part of me, and it's something that I've been working on for a while now, and it's been great processing it and healing the layers as they come up. And also, as we do new things, new layers of those instances will continue to come up. And so a lot of that has been coming up for me over the last couple of days of having to ask for things, which I'm really good at giving. Oh man, can I give all day long? I can see your dreams for your business. I can see that partnership that you're desiring, I can see that new job that you want so clearly, I can see it so easy for others. And I'm willing to help and I'm willing to give and I'm willing to pump you up and I'm willing to do all that. And also, I think most of us are relearning how to accept things and how to accept help, support, all of the things, right? And I know for me, even in my relationship with my husband, um, something actually came up for me the other day that's feeling really present. It was like, how can I just receive for him without giving having to feel like I need to give anything back? And that hit me so deep because I was like, oh, I don't know. That's a new layer that we're uncovering. And so, you know, when we're starting something new, all the emotions coming up. And so in this moment that I've been working through things, I am asking Lisa for support in this moment of feeling very vulnerable, feeling like I am asking for things that are a little uncomfortable. And these are people that I respect and that I love and that have a few of the women that I've asked to come as speakers are women that have uh mentored me or I've been to retreats with and they were like leading it. And, you know, these are women who are in the healing community, they're doing the thing. And so there's a little bit of that, right, that's going on there. And also, like, I know intellectually in my mind it's okay if they say no, and I expect some of them to say no because we're busy and it's not gonna align with everybody's schedule, and some people might have boundaries that they're not doing anything like that right now. And also, I have this little girl that's like, I don't want anybody to say no to me. And if they say no, that means I'm not loved and I'm not liked. And, you know, as I do a lot of inner child work, I was sitting um with myself on the river yesterday, and there was this big part of me that was in remembrance of like, I think it was like 10 or 11 years old. This little girl had friends, and I don't know. I know there's something that happened, and I don't know exactly what it is, but the body definitely remembers because when I was sitting there with myself, like asking, okay, what's present, what's coming up for me, this little girl came forward, and the brief memory that I got was just being so left out by people that I really thought were my friends, and that has really stuck with me the all these years, and I got to see her and I got to love her, and like I got to let her feel her emotions, and I got to tell her, you know, she's amazing and I'm there for her and all this stuff, and I still have some vulnerability coming up about it, like this morning when I got up, and so yeah, what do you got for me, Lisa? Because I feel like I'm just spewing out right now real talk right now, right?

SPEAKER_00 8:35

Exactly. I I'm feeling like well, because I know you did a little bit of a process already. So, what were you able to give your little girl so far in this process? Like, what were you able to connect with her? Or what what it what exactly does she need? Does she just need some more love? Does she need some more support? Does she need to feel seen right now? Like what is she needing?

SPEAKER_01 9:04

So I've been able to see her and give her a space to feel her emotions, and I've also got to reassure her that like I'm here, her evolved self, her higher self is always here for her and never gonna let go of her or leave her or abandon her, and that's felt really nourishing. So, in the aspect, that's where I've been able to meet her, but in the aspect of like what else does she need? Hmm, let me fill into that for one second. I'm hearing more play, which feels like such like maybe a little bit of a cop out for her, because I sometimes I think we can Yeah, what's coming to me is like as a little girl when my parents were fighting a lot and there was a lot of loudness disassociating with play, um, disassociating with le going outside of the house and playing, which was her safe space at the time, but that didn't always serve her. Um, and so I think it's more of like asking her what are the emotions that were coming up for her that she never got to process at that age. So really giving her space to talk about those emotions because now that I'm really sitting with it, it was a lot of disassociating happening for her um around those ages.

SPEAKER_00 10:19

Yeah, that's so true. And I think also even if you know, talking her through like what's actually happening, right? So maybe even like talking with her, of being like, Hey, I know you're afraid that this person might say no, or this person might not be your friend anymore, but it's okay, you know, and just like sharing her with that like worst case scenario, like reframing it a little bit with her, and just being like it's safe, it's it's okay if someone, you know, says no or or you know dismisses you in a way that feels like such that harsh rejection, like I know we've talked about, like having rejection as an adult, you know, is so crazy. And like really allowing yourself to to be okay with with the scenario, I think. Maybe I don't know if you've ever done the like worst case scenario, you know, kind of as well. So like that could be something that could be being like, you know, creating that safety that's already there on the other side, right? No matter what happens.

SPEAKER_01 11:25

Yeah, okay. I like that. I like that feedback for sure. Going down the worst case scenario because our our ego and our fear and our pride and all that will tell us like, well, never no one's ever gonna be our friends again. We're never gonna make a new friend in our life. But that's like actually not the truth, right? And so going down that worst case scenario, it's like, okay, the worst case scenario is to say no. You know, the worst case scenario is like, yeah, and we're not friends anymore, which we're gonna do a whole podcast on like friendships and outgrowing people and things of that sort because it's a big conversation, especially in the space to have. And that feels good. I'll I'll definitely sit with her um and see and and really give her that space. And I actually just started the cutest little journal with her. I think I sent you a picture. It's like yeah, so it's like a I don't know, what is that, like six-year-old journal with like a little unicorn on it? It's like fuzzy. I got it's basically a journal from my little girl to my big girl, and we're having conversations back and forth. So I will take it in my journal and definitely have that conversation with her. And I and I sometimes there's this preconceived notion that if we heal it once or if we address the situation or the thing that hurt us, you know, once or twice, that it should be gone. And in some cases, that is the truth, and that is that is something that is happening, and also there are different layers that came up. So even though I know I've sat with this age before, now that I'm in another situation where I'm asking people to, you know, now it's opening up this other part of me that wants to go deeper in my receiving. Yeah, and I know I've done really good, and I know it's something we first learned in our coaching certification in 2019 is like just say thank you when somebody gives your sweater a compliment, even if you got it at Ross with a goodwill. Just say thank you, you know, and it's like there doesn't have to be a a sentence after the thank you, right? And so that's not something that I know that I've been able to really like, you know, accept. And like when people want to buy me lunch or buy me dinner or whatever, I'm like, yeah, sure, thank you so much, right? Uh, and then there's this other layer of like now there's these deeper ass and these deep deeper vulnerability. And so uh yeah, it's just it's good to know that there are more layers that come up, but they do get a little easier some sometimes, actually, maybe not.

SPEAKER_00 13:40

Yeah, I think it depends. I think it depends what's coming up and what the s situation is. But again, I think coming back to understanding that whenever something is happening and we call them triggers, but it's really just an emotion that comes up during a situation. And uh depending on how you respond or react to this uh situation, this aka your emotion that comes through, it really is about what you're making it mean. So, what is a story that you're telling yourself that's clearly going to either have you spiral even more or allow you to feel the emotion fully and allow you to release it in a way that feels good and feels healthier. Or it's also just being stepping back and just being that observer, you know, and listening to that inner part of you, whatever that looks like. Maybe it is that younger self of you, or it could be even yesterday's self, you know, just to to also remind you that even though we do talk about these the inner child and we talk about uh allowing, you know, you to connect with these different parts of you, it may even be it's every all of it is your past self and you are this evolved version of you today. So whatever you res you connect with this past version of you that is creating this meaning. Yes, a lot of times it is stuck in you know your younger years, but uh it could be a part of you that got re triggered at some point and still got like stuck there. So you're working through different layers of this, you know, because again, your whatever beliefs you have, whatever thoughts you have, your ego and your mind is is looking for uh the uh situations to confirm it, to uh validate it. Um so your beliefs are everything. And and especially when you're making your these meanings and stories of things. And and we've been talking about this a lot lately, especially with going on this journey with the podcast and going on this journey with creating something new. It's like, what are we making this mean? You know, what what's stopping us from from being successful? What's stopping us from moving forward and like doing this this event that sounds so crazy and how the heck am I gonna be that person to do it? But like I also believe that you can, you know, because whatever you believe is true. So that's where we will talk about it a couple of questions, and that that really allows you. And I've I've been working on this with myself and even my boyfriend, like whatever you make success mean, whatever you make failure mean, rewire it, change it. Because this allows you to expand and get out of your comfort zone and get into uh becoming the version that you want to be, because becoming the version that you truly want to be and who you're meant to become is going to get that desire that you're looking for. Or it's just like when you want like a brand new car or when you want that like partnership or whatever that is, the new job, whatever that is, you have to become that version of you in order to get that thing. It's a vibration, it's a frequency. It's not like staying here and not believing that it's gonna, it's gonna, it's the belief of like, oh, it's one day. One day it's gonna happen. What about what if it happens tomorrow? What if you know, what if you have it next week, you know, like things can happen so quickly when you're on a better frequency, when you're on a better vibration. So what are you making, you know, this mean? What are you making this mean?

SPEAKER_01 16:58

I wanna just add to that because there's two sides of every coin, right? So like my my my fear, my ego, my vulnerability wants to make it mean that like no one likes me if they say no, like that I'm not, you know, all these things that it makes up. And I have one of my really good friends, Nia. She, as we're talking and getting closer, and she she's my wiser friend, older friend, and she was like, you know, I just I just don't believe in writing fiction. And I was like, oh shit, you know, I do that a lot. I write fiction of what I think it means or what the other person is thinking or what they're meaning, or and and I just hit really home, right? So we can write fiction for the worst case scenario, or we can write fiction for the best case scenario. Yeah, and I'm in a uh 21-day abundance timeline that I'm doing right now. One of the things she's really driving home is like, what are you making true? Your thoughts are making it true. And this is stuff we all know, and sometimes we need to like beat it with a dead horse because it's not necessarily more healing that we need, it's reprogramming that we need. We have to think about the years and years of programming that have been embedded in our subconscious in our body from our grandparents, from our ancestors, and the and we're finally in the stage and the era and the awakening of humanity where we're reprogramming what society told us and what they've programmed us for years. So it's like, how do we reprogram those thoughts every moment at every day? Because we can get lost so easy in them. And so, what are we making it mean? And whatever it is, let's let it be the positive polarity, let it be the positive of what we desire. And so, really asking yourself, like, and it's so subtle too, because we won't even realize we're doing it, and then you'll catch yourself in this, like, what am I making it mean? And it's like for the negative, like, why would we spend any time doing that? And so, really, really opening yourself up to that and making that be like I I'm gonna have set the intention for my week, going into my week. Uh, what am I making this mean? And yeah, something else that I've been sitting with uh from a course in miracles, I have right here on my sticky is nothing I see means anything. Nothing I see means anything, and that's what I was like really feeling into yesterday as I'm like moving through all these emotions and and coaching myself and getting support, and that's so important when you guys are going through stuff is like to ask support, to be vulnerable. I reached out to a girl in our program that I'm not like super close with, and I was like, you know what? I'm gonna shoot my shot. I heard that the other day on the TV. I'm like, I like that. I'm gonna shoot my shot, right? I reached out to her, she was so caring and so loving and so like I'm here, let me support you. And it's like I don't even really know this girl, but it was so nice for her to say that and to give that. And so, you know, when you're in the spiral, when you're finding yourself in those things, who can you ask support from? Like, get a besties. I got like the best besties, like Lisa and I got and I got my friend Lucy. Like, it's taken me a long time to get there. And I know that we're gonna, like I've mentioned before on this podcast, that we're gonna have a whole podcast on friendships. It is so nourishing to have women in your corner that like love you no matter what, and even in your darkest moments, like they will listen to you with no judgment. And I'm so grateful for you, Lisa. So grateful for all of my friends that I've been able to create that, but it's taken years, honestly, to create that. And that doesn't have to take that long, but it's taken a long time for me to really create that.

SPEAKER_00 20:12

Yeah. I think you have the bug over there or what? Yes, there was a bug that land on my face.

SPEAKER_01 20:20

For those who are not watching this, she's outside and she's like getting like slaughter in every couple minutes.

SPEAKER_00 20:29

And but I I definitely agree with that because I think as entrepreneurs and just in the human experience, we're just taught so much to do it on your own. Yeah, and you can do this and you know, like hustle and do all those things, and like yeah, like just push through it, like you got it. And like I don't think that's the reality anymore. And I think we're craving this community, we're craving this connection and real support. Like, I do believe that like we're we're meant to be vulnerable. We're we're we were taught that like vulnerability is weak, and you know, like being sensitive is weak, and you know, asking for so much help, like you're weak and you're lazy and whatever. Like what again, whatever meaning you're making of it is the truth for you, but like is it the actual truth? Usually no. So allow yourself to see whatever we're sharing and whatever's like resonating with you, whatever's like, oh, I do notice that. I do, I have done that before. Allow you to take that piece and just be like, well, what is it meaning for me right now? And allow yourself to dive a little deeper, maybe sit with it, maybe meditate, maybe just keep asking yourself and seeing what comes through. And and again, like let's let synchronicities happen for this. Like you might get into a conversation and you're like, Oh my God, I was just thinking that the other day, or like I had the same conversation with myself, you know. Like we we happen to have this all the time. Like we were like, Oh my god, yeah, like I just got a sign and it was like you you or you overhear something, you know, and I'm like, wow, like how how am I hearing this? Because it's the exact conversation I was having in my head, or like. Like whatever it is, and allow yourself to know that you're not the only one experiencing it. And then remind yourself that, like, sometimes too, you have to like look at not idols necessarily, but like someone else that has done the thing that you want to do, right? Be like, well, it's possible for them, so why not me? Why am I comparing myself, you know, and and feeling like I can never get there, but like someone else has already proved me wrong, like someone can get there. So you use them as the example of like it's possible for me, and I'm gonna become the version of myself to get there. So the actual truth is I can do it. And just keep reminding yourself, like you are worthy of whatever you're desiring, you're worthy of this next version of yourself, whatever that is. And and I feel like, you know, as we're going through this creation process, both of us, it's like really pushing our edges of like what is possible for us. And that we've that we thought we had big dreams before, and we're like, oh my god, we did a podcast, and we're just like, we have no idea where it's gonna unfold. It's gonna push our own boundaries and visions of like, wow, we got to this point now, like what's next? You know, like expanding it even more. And again, we're gonna expand into a new version of ourselves. Like, we're not gonna be the same a year from now when this podcast has been out for a year. Like that is mind blowing for both of us. We're like, what did we just create? And like, what is gonna happen with this? But it's so exciting at the same time because we're like, this is this can change so many lives and ourselves as well. Like, because we we've been on this journey and we just want to keep sharing it, and that's our intention. And we know that when you set the intention of giving to other people with with such pure intention, and the fact that like we're recognizing you, whatever you're going through as well, and with our own versions and our own experiences, like this is what matters. This is the connection and the the vulnerability, this is why we're stepping out of our comfort zone, this is why we're doing all of this, why we're creating the things, because we wish that someone was, you know, that for us. So we get to be the ones to bring this to you as well. And hopefully this is all landing pretty, pretty good for you guys.

SPEAKER_01 24:02

Yeah. Before you go into the next part, I know we kind of asked you for support and then we kind of went off and tangent. We did. Um, is there anything else that you may have for me?

SPEAKER_00 24:14

Let's take a couple of deep breaths and just kind of get back into the support. Like you already know everything, so I don't feel like that is necessarily because I feel like it might push an edge though for you if you get witnessed in more ways than one. Fine.

SPEAKER_01 25:12

You know, and just a perfect example.

SPEAKER_00 25:15

It doesn't have to be like a, you know, a lot, of course. Like three minutes, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 25:18

So maybe you want to explain a little bit about what a feeler is, and then we can kind of go from there.

SPEAKER_00 25:23

So we call them feelers from one of our mentors, and basically it's it's kind of just sitting in this space and having and holding someone's holding the container, holding the space safely, of course, and with so much love, so much presence for the other person to fully express what's coming to to them. Um because a lot of times, again, this is the vulnerability piece. This is the piece where uh we're not taught this because we you know, or we're taught to respond immediately. And sometimes we don't need that. Sometimes we just need to sit in what we're feeling and not to like, you know, ruminate or or spiral a little bit more. It's more of just like, what are you actually feeling? And how can I hold this space for you? How can I give you so much love by just expressing what you're needing to release? Because guess what? When we release whatever it is or whatever, allow that emotion to come up and allow these thoughts and words to come through. Sometimes it's a lot of words, sometimes it's a little bit. And you automatically feel like a relief. You feel a little less pressure because when you're allowed to say it, no matter what comes through, it allows you to release the emotion so it's not suppressed anymore. It it allows that layer to release, and you know, of course, more things can happen, but basically we're just uh being in the moment with whatever's coming up for for Desi in this instance, and it is gonna be a little uncomfortable. So we're giving Desi so much grace, so much love, so much support. And if you are listening during this time, I'm going to invite you to also be a support for Desi in this moment, even if you're listening to this on the replay. But guess what? This is what the cool thing is, even though we're virtual and we're not real time, open your heart space, allow yourself to hold Desi as if you're giving her a big hug, as if you're just like opening your arms for her to really be received and to really allow her to feel the love, feel the support in this moment. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:31

So what's coming up for me right now is just being nervous, being vulnerable, speaking my truth out for I don't know, millions of people to hear. And there's a lot of like fear of can I get this done in time? Am I gonna be able to do all the things? I actually really put a short time frame on what I'm creating for multiple different reasons, and I knew it was gonna like really push my edges. And what was really coming up for me and being so present was reminding me of the first time I ever publ did publicly speaking for my business back in like 2020. I started my you know Heal Your Mind Body Summit, and that was so fun, and I I was so nervous telling my story that like all of my fear and all of my anxiety and all of the things are coming up to the like top of my chest, and this is before I did a lot of work around my yelling with my husband, and it was just like this energy of like I couldn't hold it all, and then I was just like lashing out at people, and so I'm feeling like a lot of that old energy coming to the surface, which is beautiful because now I have the tools and I've done enough work six years later to not act out, but I feel it, and it's a little scary for me. It's a little scary to know that that energy is still under there, and also I have so much grace for my that part of myself, and so really trying to meet her and not feel overwhelmed and learn how to set boundaries with myself and my business because I'm it's easy to get lost in my I am my business, and I I can feel myself getting lost in my business that I am my business, but I'm not my business, I am Desi. I am so many other things in my business, and so there's some entanglement coming that has been really present for me, and um, and there's a part of me that wants to run away and just be like, forget it, I can't do it, I don't want to do it. And then so there's a lot of different parts of me that have been coming up that I've been trying my best to to nourish and to love and to hold, and also I'm so grateful that I don't have to do this alone. And um, let's see, what else is present for me? And part of the feelers, guys, is just talking for like a certain amount of time, and so I think it's been a couple minutes, but um you feel to tap into your body and like what's where are you feeling the tension?

SPEAKER_00 29:51

Where are you feeling? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 29:54

Um, so a lot of it is in my upper stomach and my solar plexus, my lower stomach, also in my chest and my shoulders, literally, probably just like my whole torso is a lot of it. Um, I also get a lot of the feelings in my hands. And um yeah, so it's been really present just like in my mostly in my solar plexus, where it's like that like confidence that personal power has really been hit because I'm like, do I have the power? Can I do all the things? And so I'm feeling a little uh burnt, I think I'm getting a little burnt out because I am a busy in a really busy season of of business and creating and all the things. When I think about it, it does feel very overwhelming. Yeah, that's where I feel it in my body. How are you feeling now? I'm feeling like more light, and I just like want to laugh it all off, like we talked about in our last episode. Just like laugh it off.

SPEAKER_00 30:45

You just need to laugh it out. Like I mean it's it's a release, it's a release. It's like, oh my god, like you're you were holding so much in and you were going and going, which you know, which was needed, and that's why I brought you back to your body of like where are you feeling this? And it's like we we we like uh kind of diagnose ourselves a lot of times too, because we're just so used to that. True, and so it's like feeling into like oh that solar plexus really just needs some love too, even you know, that like my core is so powerful, you are so powerful, you know, like tapping into that piece and just allowing yourself to uh like notice the sensations, notice the emotions, notice sensations that are coming up because the body is is always communicating with us, right? And you're like holding so much tension. But can you like shrug your shoulders and just like fully release and like let it go now? Maybe shake anything out. Shake, shake, shake.

SPEAKER_01 31:40

I'm oh sore, actually, which feels a little good.

SPEAKER_00 31:44

Holding it, you're getting it in.

SPEAKER_01 31:46

Oh, you know, and something else that's been present uh that we talked about before we got on the podcast is I'm in the middle of detoxing off of sugar and changing my diet because I have candida. If you don't know what candida is, it is a fungus. It's not a fungus, yeah. It is kind of a fungus, it's a uh microbiome that we already shoot, I don't even know if microbiome is the right word. Um, but it is it's a yeast that's already in our body, so it's in our stomach, it's in our mouth, it's in all lots of different places. It is a functioning part of our body, and I have overgrowth. It makes you really tired, it steals your nutrition, it feeds off of sugar and makes you feel hungry when you're not hungry. So I could literally have a meal feel full for like maybe two minutes and be like, I'm hungry again. Um, and messes with your sleep. It's all these different things that have been happening in my body. Um, I've been battling this for years, and so with all these really big things I'm doing, I'm like, yeah, let's do it. Cleanse on top of it. That sounds great. And so uh when we cleanse and we clear our body, stuck emotions will come up that way too. So I know it's been a compound of things that are coming up for me. And this morning I really had to honor myself. I had a call with my girls for one of my group coachings, and I was, I just I knew if I forced myself to do it, I wasn't gonna be bringing my A game for them. And I sometimes we have to show up when we're tired, and you know, we still do the things or whatever, and sometimes we have to say no to the thing that we think we have to do, right? Like I'm not gonna go to work today, or I didn't take the call, and I had to honor myself, and the women that I work with are so amazing. Of course, they're gonna understand. And what kind of leader am I if I show up, you know, 50% of my battery to lead these women? I think I was probably maybe at 30%, not even 30% this morning, right? And so I really had to make that decision, and as uncomfortable as it felt, the minute I made the decision to honor myself, a huge weight was lifted off of me, and that was like so comforting to be able to do that. I didn't know if I was gonna be able to record this episode, and that's why we kind of pivoted today. Um, right. So it's like we gotta honor all parts of ourselves of wherever we're at in our journey. And thank you so much for witnessing me, Lisa. Um feels really good and it is vulnerable to do something like this, especially like on a podcast. I remember the first time we did this, it was really awkward. I'm like, I don't know. Uh you had already been doing them. Yes. And yeah, and it and you know, so maybe if you're listening and you're feeling like you need somebody to witness you calling one of your best friends and be like, hey, I'm gonna set a timer for like two minutes, three minutes, and I'm just gonna verbally say everything that comes to my mind. And I promise you, you're gonna feel like a 10-pound weight lifted off of your chest. Yes.

SPEAKER_00 34:26

And also the permission to make sure the other person as well is ready to hold you. And also make sure you are clear with either you do want feedback or you don't. Yeah. Because sometimes we don't need the feedback. We just need to listen. Even if we, yeah, we just need somebody to listen. We just need some, we don't need somebody to fix it. We don't need somebody to share anything. Um, and it just depends on where you're at. So give yourself permission to also ask for that.

SPEAKER_01 34:53

Yeah, let's let's make a note to put in the show notes a little outline of like what it would look like to um either hold it or yeah, to be able to bring that medicine to yourself or to your best friends. Or, and if all as always, if you ever need support, reach out to Lisa and I at Real Talk Real Healing podcast on IG, and we'd be more than willing to to support you, give you some guidance, direct you in the appropriate place, or you know, whatever needs to happen in those moments. So one of the other things we want, go ahead. Did you have something to say?

SPEAKER_00 35:29

I did I did want to reflect back to you real quick was that the fact that we were going through the feeler, and of course you felt it in your gut and your solar plexus, and you know, that was the part of you that was very active and very tense at first. And the fact that you today, this morning, honored your energy and you felt that same sensation sensation of like you, you held your power, you held your like your own identity in that. So I just want to let you know that I think that was such a beautiful reflection for you because you did choose your own identity, your own power in that moment. And that's why it felt such a relief for you as well.

SPEAKER_01 36:08

Thank you, thank you for that reflection. That's beautiful. I appreciate that. Yeah, that was actually being in my empowerment rather than my wounded, because I've been in corporate the last 20 years. So you best believe that I did all the things that were not honoring to myself. That's for sure. Yeah, for sure. So, you know, the energy you show up in really really matters, guys. How you show up for your people, how you show up for your family, how you show up for yourself matters because the people around you, the people even, you know, that you don't even think you have an impact on going to the grocery store, they can feel your energy. Like if you're in a grocery store and you sense somebody and you're like, I don't have bad vibes or bad feelings, like we are energetic beings and we might not consciously realize that we understand what people's energy feels like, but let when once you get more aware of it, you really can tap into how other people feel, what's you know, showing up for them, and it's very subconscious too. So, like what you guys do, how you show up in your energy, how you take care of yourself, the boundaries you set all impact everything from your work to your partners to your friendships to your bank account to all of your outcomes. And so, how are you showing up? What energy do you want to be in? If you're feeling like, okay, I don't like the way I've been showing up, I don't like how my days a day have been feeling. Get clear. What is it that I do desire? Write it down, start doing those daily intentions that I know we've talked about here before. Like today, I was like, I just want to feel present. And I I had you know, my call this morning. We had this plan, and I have plans with with my family, uh, with the husband, and I have been so busy, like I've been going, going, going. And I just want to be so present with them after this, and so present doing this. And so, you know, what energy do you want to be in? And how do you want to show up? Yeah, you know, how do you want to show up in your day-to-day? How do you want to show up in your mornings and your afternoons? Like, just break it down, make it really simple. How do you want to show up with your kids, with yourself? Like, just pick one area. Like, it doesn't have to be overwhelming, it doesn't have to be, you know, too much. It doesn't have to be everything at once. It's like, let's just pick micro actions. One of the things that I do with my clients, especially when we're building trust, they're building trust with themselves, like one thing you can do that's so easy to start trusting yourself, like making your bed, flossing your teeth, brushing your teeth twice a day, like just something so simple, right? Keep it simple, don't overcomplicate it.

SPEAKER_00 38:39

Yeah, 100%. I think that's the biggest key. And and also I wanted to remind you too that because your energy is so uh it's you really should like hone on your energy every single day. And again, it's like for us, for example, with entrepreneurship, it is holding a higher standard for ourselves and for our business because we want to serve people in a higher way. We want people to feel our energy, feel good energy when they listen or when they listen to our content, or we know that if we show up in a wonky or lower energy, like people are gonna feel that and they're gonna be like, they're gonna swipe away. And they might not know why they did that. They might just feel like not connected to us. And then again, it's like then they're not gonna want to come back to our energy or come back to our content or come back to the podcast if they feel like something's disconnected. And that's that's okay. You know, sometimes it's that's their own energy, and they're and we're maybe maybe even triggering them, you know. Like it could be even like we're positive and you know, bubbly and whatever, and they're like, oh no, these people are not for me. Like I need some more shadow work. Yeah, like it could be a reflection in a mirror, and all all relationships are mirrors, and everything is a mirror to us, you know, reflecting back to us what we what we currently need or what's what we need to look at. And I think a big thing that I remember specifically from um our original mentor doing our certification together was that she would always be like before a call, because we would have these live calls, we'd have modules to follow and listen and practices, and then we'd have the live calls all together. And the live call, I remember one time she was just like, you know what, like energy is literally everything. And I had, you know, a certain amount of time before the call. And why she holds this high standard of the energy for her own self or her own business. And she's like, I need to be in integrity with my energy. Like, either I can choose this next hour or whatever it was and do more like work on the business, which would keep me in a low energy, low vibration, and show up at this, you know, like more of a heady space, you know, for our call, which is supposed to be fun and light and like, you know, talkative and everything. Or she can go have fun because guess what? That was her priority. Like she was all about fun. She's like, I'm gonna go slide in the pool and like jump in a pool and like, you know, and have so much fun because guess what? I'm gonna show up so much and better energy to the call. And and and we can receive that. We receive energy. Like, oh my God, she is so present, she is so alive, she is so, you know, X, Y, and Z. And that's exactly our intention. And what this call is all about is because the way you show up matters. And the way you and how you do everything is is is is super big with your energy as well. Because if you're showing up, you know, I forget the saying that I I'm pretty sure she used to always say too, but like it's the way you do ever anything is the way you do everything. It's like I forget exactly I might have messed it up. No, that's that's it. And I I have like a quarrel with that freaking yeah, with that saying, but there's truth to it. It is some truth to it. But like, but again, it's like, you know, it's it's it's this reflection and this awareness of what are you choosing to do? And I I I think I shared it on the on the one episode we recorded, but um, and I've told you about it recently, where like I'm having so many shifts right now in my own energy, and I'm like, I know this stuff, but like for some reason I'm just doing it on a deeper level with this more work that I'm doing currently that's shifting it super quickly. And I'm like, I know these things, but like it's just shifting really instantly with me. And I'm just so much more aware. And I'm like, instead of choosing the worry and the fear, especially like finances for this month is and and so many celebrations, I'm always like so overwhelmed with like all the birthdays at once, and it's too much. And I'm like, I'm not choosing that anymore because that is the reality that I'm creating if I'm still focusing on that and I'm if I'm still spiraling in that moment of being like, because my mind's gonna be like, yes, that's true. Yes, that's true, yes, that's true, and give me more of that instead of being like, No, I'm choosing to have fun, I'm choosing to do things that light me up because now I can be so present with everybody. I can be so present and actually celebrate because guess what? It's my birthday month too. Hello, hello, and it's like by the time I get to my birthday, I'm burnt out. Like I'm just like, I want to celebrate, you know, and it sucks. Like, who wants to be in that reality? Right. So aligning your energy every single day with an intention, with breath work, with whatever, like that is going to be a game changer. And that's why we, you know, we can clearly hear that I'm passionate about it and that Desi's passionate about this because it is changed our life. And we come back to it time and time again, even if we're having a crappy day, you know, even if we're having the day like Desi, like we're human, Desi woke up not feeling great. And now, you know, we're having conversations, we're supporting each other and we're allowing ourselves to shift it. And guess what? If we need a little bit more time to release it and be in it, that's okay too.

SPEAKER_01 43:34

But I think if I had like another hour before my call this morning, I could have shifted it. But I had already woken up, was outside having breakfast or not breakfast, coffee. I was reading a book. I uh went outside, I took the dogs for a little walk, I was moving my body, I like did a couple of my practices and I was like, oh no, this is not budging this morning. And instead of like shaving myself, shitting myself, would have you know, all those things, I just decided what else we're doing. windy outside. Oh sorry. I like really just allowed it to be and and I honored like look in the next 45 minutes I don't think I'm gonna be able to get to the vibration that I desire to get into um to show up in my in my best alignment and you know being able to to honor that which was yeah like you said so much in my power. So really thank you for for having you know reflecting that back to me because that was really really important. I know one of the things that we've talked about is like the shoulds right like we should do this and should do that. And it's like what could happen when we get into the possibility of setting intentions and choosing the positive polarity rather than the negative like what could happen as we do all this and I know both of us are like all the time stepping into that. Like every day I feel like we are pushing up against our edges with everything that we're doing. And I I'm so grateful for that. I'm so grateful that we have this space. I'm so grateful that we're choosing this and that we continue to to honor ourselves and show up over and over again. Where are we on our notes by the way?

SPEAKER_00 45:06

I think we can get into just a reminder of of what you can do daily to tap into your energy and then we'll we'll kind of end it there. Because I think we I think we we honed at home a little bit. But again it's it's just we're just so passionate about like because we know what it takes to shift your energy and we know how much it changes things when you change your when you shift your energy. So what you can do daily to shift your energy and get back into alignment with your center with your own truth is number one listening to your intuition. So again intuition is normally more of a whisper than the ego and and urgent so finding the differences between your intuition and your ego. I did record an intuition uh exercise so I'll put it in the we'll make sure I put it back in the in the notes so at the bottom so that way you can come back to that I think yeah in episode three we talked a lot about intuition so go back to that one if you need a little refresher. And number two would be like honoring your emotions instead of pushing through so exactly what Desi did today. She was just like yeah not today. I can't hold the same vibration and the free the exact standard that she wants to show up in. So honoring whatever you're feeling and maybe that is you know quote unquote letting people down. And that's also again just a meaning that you're making of it you know people understand people shift and that's where having people around you to support you and being with it in it with you is going to be super super supportive. And then the next thing that's a really big big part which also Desi shared shared with us as well is health being intentional with what you fuel in your body. So of course noticing the awareness of whatever you're consuming something and this also doesn't have to be just food but we're gonna use food as an example for a moment is that of course you're gonna feel different when you're eating an apple versus a cheeseburger and fries right it's it's allowing yourself to notice like obviously yes sometimes we want to allow ourselves those foods and I can share this example of last week having so many days in a row of lots of food, lots of sugar, lots of alcohol because of celebrations and my body's like enough please stop giving me a salad like I'm actually craving salads. I'm feeling so much more energy because I'm doing salads or I'm coming to my practices that help me shift that energy and being like okay like I get to choose my other standard again. Like I get to come back to my energy my own alignment. And this can also mean what you consume because maybe you're in an area where you're you're finding yourself scrolling more often your comparison you're in in that mindset and because it's just a quick dopamine hit. So allow yourself to get into nature instead allow yourself to take some deep breaths sometimes you know so always come back to Desi's uh energy leaks book ebook because that is also that reminder as well is where are you making are you giving yourself more energy and where is your energy just draining? Yeah so good.

SPEAKER_01 48:08

So the big takeaways from today is you don't grow when you stay comfortable. Comfort is out our growth is outside the comfort zone. So I think we've all seen the little circle diagram where it's like growth here, comfort here, right? And so the thing with to know about this too is if you aren't choosing your own growth, the universe will choose it for you by losing the job, losing the partner, sickness, something really catastrophic happening and we always have the opportunity to choose you know the healing route and and to like what am I learning from this and how can I better myself or we can just loop around in the same pattern again and that's never any fun. So growth happens outside your comfort zone and creating anything new is going to bring up the parts of you that are ready to be seen or ready to be healed. And so I want to bring this example of like okay I want a relationship right I want to be in a relationship I desire to have partnership I can't wait till I'm gonna have partnership this is amazing. And as we're asking the universe that it will show us all the things that are blocking us from having it. So if you're feeling really insecure if you're having a lot of self-doubt if you're projecting onto you know your people or the the people that you're dating you know all those little things will come up and be like hey here I am like do you want to heal it like how are we going to make room for the new thing if you're still stuck in the old cycles with the old toxic relationships with the men that da da da da right so it's like oh okay actually no I have to set boundaries like if that's a red flag I'm not going on a second date right like there's so much that will come up in the the things that we desire and that's the beautiful process of this earth that we live on and that's just facts. So what are you calling in and as is it's coming and as the layers are coming up getting the support doing the work you know the goal isn't to avoid it it is to move through it with awareness. Oh yeah like I knew just this morning yeah amen I knew this morning I was feeling some things and I've been moving through some things and cool how can I honor that part of myself even more and I know it's not easy for most of us because we are not taught that we don't honor ourselves we don't honor our our emotions and so that's just a really big part of what we wanted to share with you today.

SPEAKER_00 50:17

Yes and thank you for listening thank you for being here for Desi in this supportive session as well and we wanted to remind you that we do have a little more time for our giveaway so thank you all for the love about our podcast and listening we so so so appreciate you have no idea how much it means to us but if you would like to enter in one more giveaway with us that you do have the time still so we're gonna allow this is right now it's we're in the middle of May as we're recording this live, but you have until the end of June to enter our giveaway. So all that means is make sure you rate and review our podcast make sure you screenshot and DM us on our Instagram um Instagram podcast yeah podcast Instagram real talk real healing there we go and um you're going to of course get entered into giving a 30 minute session with both of us which Desi will be doing an Akasha reading and I will be doing either your choice of a birth chart or Oracle reading. So make sure you screenshot and DM us when we're reviewing or leaving a comment and we will share some more things in the future and also of course if you do have any topics that you would like us to cover or have any questions for us also open our DMs are open for that as well because we get intuitive hits of course that we love sharing but if you do have any topics that you would love for us to cover definitely reach out and definitely don't be afraid to share.

SPEAKER_01 51:43

Yeah and shameless plug this event that I am building out is an eight day sacred return Little Girl Big Healing where I'm gonna be taking women with other amazing people in my life speakers coaches and we're really gonna be going on this journey of meeting that little girl building a relationship with her and so much more that is going to be coming June 15th through the 25th. So mark your calendar now it's gonna be so much fun and yeah it's a free event too. So it's really just investing your time and I'm so excited to really bring this to life because it's near and dear to my heart and as I'm creating it there's so much excitement behind it. There's so much like as I'm creating the graphics as I'm putting it all together I'm like yes yes yes all of it feels so good. So overall it's feeling really exciting and really good and there's still parts of it that we get to work through and that's so beautiful because now it's making me a better leader. It's making me more bodied embodied in my work it's like okay I'm taking other women through the exact things that I'm doing and that is the best kind of leaders in my opinion. So thank you guys so much for being here we love you so much. Bye see you next time