You've got TIME!

What if the life you have been picturing for yourself is still completely available to you?

Trust me, I know what it feels like to look at someone doing the exact thing you always said you would do, and feel behind. That complicated, almost ashamed feeling you can't quite name.

This is the episode I had to make. Because I have been on both sides of this, the woman who had the career and missed the life, and the woman impatient for the next chapter to begin. What I know now is that the timeline you are comparing yourself to was never actually yours to begin with.

What we cover:

• Why the feeling of being behind is lying to you
• My 'moment' and what it cost me
• The women who prove there is no deadline on becoming who you are meant to be
• What to do right now whether you have capacity or zero capacity left
• Why fighting the season you are in is the fastest way to miss it entirely

Not yet is not the same as never.

If you need permission to believe that, this one is for you.

Loved this episode? Share it with a woman who needs to hear it right now

Find me on Instagram //www.instagram.com/_nicoleabbott/ 

Ready for more? https://www.nicoleabbott.co/

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

I want to talk to a specific woman today. She's scrolling Instagram and she sees someone doing the exact thing she wanted to do. Building the thing she always wanted to build, living the life she pictured for herself. And she feels that triggered, almost ashamed feeling that she just can't name. In that moment, she thinks, I have missed my shot, I've missed the boat. This episode is for that woman, and if that is you, I need you to hear this. You have not missed anything and you are not running out of time. The life you're picturing, that is still available to you. This is Next Level with Nick. I'm Nicole Abbott, high performance health and identity coach, surfer and mum of three. This podcast is for the woman who wants to feel amazing, sustain her success, and love the life she's building. We talk all the good stuff, no fluff and no filters. Let's go. So let's describe her, and if you're her, you're going to feel so very seen. She wakes up, and before she's even had a moment to herself, it's the same day as yesterday. It's the same as the day before, it's the same as the week before that. The relentless, beautiful, exhausting, completely consuming loop of motherhood. Or just life. The school runs, the work, the meals, the appointments, and the to-do lists that never get shorter. Don't get me wrong, she genuinely loves her life. She really does. But somewhere in the middle of it all, she has this quiet feeling that she's put her dreams on hold. And then she opens Instagram, and there it is. The woman doing the thing. The podcast. And instead of feeling inspired, she feels behind. I'm going to talk into that feeling today because it is lying to you. And I know this because I've been on both sides of it. There was a time in my life where I was ticking every single box. The business was growing, the revenue was there. By every external measure, I was winning. And at the same time, I was completely missing my daughter's grow-up. The weekends and just the mundane moments were the worst. The times when I would be at an open home and my family would be having a slow morning at home, or they'd be surfing or going on adventures while I was in someone else's house doing my job, missing out on everything. One of the prominent moments that I clearly remember where it really got to me was when we were on a family holiday in Tavarua. A bucketless trip. I remember every single surf racing back to the room while everyone else was heading off to lunch or chilling by the pool. I was frantically replying to emails, making calls, completely unable to just stop. I remember sitting there thinking, what on earth am I doing? I'm in Fiji on a surf trip, on a trip that I dreamt about, and I can't even allow myself to fully be here. That was the version of me who had the career but was missing her life. And now it's interesting because I find myself in a different version of this same feeling. But what I know now that I didn't know then is that everything has its season. And fighting that season that you're in is the fastest way to miss it entirely. So let's talk about what the second chapter actually looks like. I have three teenage daughters who are now all in high school, and suddenly they're just that bit more independent. My oldest daughter has her license, and to be honest, a lot of the time they're more interested in what their friends are doing than being around me and needing me every single second. That new chapter doesn't just magically appear. One day it just feels different. It's like your capacity comes back. Your creative energy has somewhere to go, and all the things you've been quietly collecting, the ideas, the knowledge, the clarity, they're just ready to come alive. That chapter is coming for you. I promise you it is coming. And to be honest, I feel like there is probably a chapter three and a chapter four. I want to tell you about a family friend of ours. She decided in her 40s that she wanted to become a social worker. At that stage, her children were in high school, so she went to university and studied for four years. She then qualified and started her career in her 50s. Then, in her 70s, she became a yoga instructor. Her 70s. She didn't miss the boat because there is no boat. She decided what she wanted and then she made it happen. Think about Mel Robbins. She didn't break through until her late 40s. Now she's one of the most listened to voices in the world. There is no deadline on becoming who you're meant to be. There is only a moment that you decide. Okay, so I know there's probably a heap of you thinking, that all sounds beautiful, but what do I actually do while I wait? Here's what I did. I consumed everything that kept me excited. Podcasts, audiobooks. I studied NLP, integrative health, high performance health. I was doing all the things behind the scenes. I was playing around with marketing, building an Instagram that fed into what I was building, even when I wasn't ready to actually build it yet. I let my creative energy go somewhere, even if I didn't know exactly what I was doing with it. I had no idea that I was building my business while I was doing all of that. I just felt like following what lit me up. And when the timing came, it all just come together. So if you have any capacity at all, use it. Not to hustle, not to force, just to follow the little thread of what excites you. Read the books, listen to the podcast, journal the ideas, take the courses and build the skills because you're not wasting time. And one day all of that richness, all of that knowledge is going to grow into something extraordinary. However, if you have zero capacity right now, if you're so in the depths, in the trenches that there is genuinely nothing left at the end of the day, the most important thing you can do is give yourself permission to stop and enjoy exactly where you are. The time you're giving to this season of your life, to your babies, to your family, to just being fully present in the middle of the ordinary is something you'll never regret. That time is so fleeting and you only get it once. When it comes to timing, I really do feel like this is the hardest thing to hear, but really is the truth. You cannot force it. And I don't mean that in a passive sit back and do nothing kind of way. When you're trying to build something before it is ready, before you are ready, that is when you create burnout. I truly believe that when it's your time, you will feel a quiet certainty, an alignment of everything you've been building inside of you with a season of life that finally has the space to hold it. Trust that. Trust that the universe has your back. Trust that everything is unfolding as it's meant to. Trust that the woman scrolling Instagram, feeling incredibly behind, isn't actually behind. She is just not yet. And remember, not yet is not the same as never. Your next level move for the week. Now you have two moves this week, so choose the one that is yours. If you have capacity right now, write down the one thing that you've always wanted to do, but you've told yourself you'd miss the boat on. Don't plan it, don't figure out the how. Just write it down and give it a name. If you have zero capacity right now, put your phone down after this episode, go be with your people and be fully there. That is not wasting time. That is your work right now. So, to the woman who found this episode at exactly the right moment, you, my friend, you have got time. I promise you, you have got so much time. I will see you next week. Don't just listen and move on. Grab a pen, write down your next level move, and actually do it this week. That one thing is your 1% and your 1% compounds. If this resonated or someone in your life needs to hear it, share it. Find me on Instagram at underscore Nicole Abbott or head to NicoleAbbott.co. See you next week.