Welcome to Up and Not Crying. This is your host, Beth Rupp. I am an MD and certified life coach. Up and Not Crying is a Norwegian phrase that you would use in response to someone asking, "How's your day going? How are you today?" Well, so far so good. We're up and not crying. I hope that this sunny summer Tuesday finds you up and not crying. In this podcast, you will learn self-improvement and coaching tools to engineer your mindset, your mood, and your schedule. We make your real life feel better. In this episode, episode 12, we're gonna just kinda slow down and reset and have kind of a midsummer check-in, a midsummer reset. Today is July 21st, which is basically halfway through summer. This year in 2026, there are 15 weeks between Memorial Day and Labor Day. We are eight weeks in. We've got seven more full fabulous weeks to go before Labor Day, and I would argue there's still a couple, at least a couple good weeks of summer weather after Labor Day. So we've got quite a bit more summer to go and this can be a little bit hard to tell sometimes, because stores now start preparing for the next season and the next holiday a good three months in advance. We've been noticing when we go to different stores that already the Halloween stuff is coming out, and it can make you feel like fall is just around the corner. And I don't know why this is, but everybody has this tendency to say things like, "Well, you know, after the Fourth of July, summer's basically over. School is just around the corner. We're gonna be sending the kids back to school, and back to school shopping," and we're all... You know, we've all got, like, one foot into fall at this point, at least it seems to me. So I wanna kind of push back against that and fully embrace the rest of the summer. I personally need to push back against this, because I am a fall girl. I am a pumpkin girl. You know, I burn really easily in the summer. I always have to marinate in sunscreen and bug spray. So summer is... I, I love all the seasons. I thoroughly enjoy summer, but I'm always ready to pull out the jeans and boots and buy the pumpkins in the fall. So I need to really slow myself down and fully appreciate the joys of summer. Like my friend Megan says, people like me get a sunburn just opening the refrigerator door. So, so that's one of the reasons summer is not my absolute favorite, although I love it. I'm, I'm always ready to put on the long sleeves and go into fall. So this is mainly a reminder for me to fully embrace the rest of all the goodness and fun and slow, simple pleasures that summer has to offer. So today we're resisting just going full force into the next season. We're gonna resist hustling. We're gonna resist thinking months in advance. We're gonna slow down, reset, and be present. So let's just live these next seven to 10 weeks of summer with full intention. Bring intention to each day and each week. How do you do that? So I have found the best way to really bring intention to your day is to sit just for a couple minutes in the morning- With a calendar and some type of daily reading. And I think it's important to have the calendar. I think it's helpful to look at the day and see it kind of in perspective with the rest of the month or the rest of the season. So you're actually looking at today's date, July 21st, and you're seeing it on the calendar. 'Cause you can, you can feel a certain way about your schedule or your day or where you at, you're at in the time of the year, but when you kind of ground yourself with the calendar, it's like, no, we're, we're dead in the middle of summer. Here we are, July 21st. It's hot summer. We're gonna bring intention to this particular summer day And then I think it's good to have some type of daily reading. It can just be a paragraph. Some people like a religious reading. There are many, many types that are not religious readings. So if you find some type of book that has the day, the day of the year in it with some type of one-page or one-paragraph reading, it can kinda just set the tone for your day. You also don't have to do that. You can do it yourself. You can sit down with a calendar. You can even just do this when you're brushing your teeth, you know, look at a calendar or just pay attention and notice the day. You've got two minutes while you're brushing your teeth to think, "Okay, how am I gonna appreciate this day? What's my intention for this day? How am I gonna show up today? How am I gonna use this one special day?" Okay? And then also kind of just bring intention and your mindset to the season. How am I, how am I gonna maximize this day in light of the season that we're in? How am I maximizing this summer day? If you haven't done this already or if you don't typically do this, now is a good time to create a summer bucket list. What would you like to have done when you look back on this summer? So in a few months, in the fall, during the holiday season, throughout the winter, maybe even a couple years from now, what do you wanna look back on this summer and have kinda pop out for you? And these can be big things and small things. So things on our bucket list in our house are, vacations, going to get ice cream at our favorite ice cream spot, b- a bike ride, floating in the pool, watching lightning bugs. We laugh about this 'cause last summer on my bucket list was state fair, and my husband's bucket list said, "No state fair." And on his bucket list was camping, and on my bucket list was no camping. So some things overlap, and some things we do with one, two, or all three of us. So make your unique list and try to fill it. Think back on your summers as a kid and think what really pops up for you. So really take a minute here and think back to your summer days as a kid, and what are the things that really stand out? So mine are Choco Tacos. I don't know if you remember these things, but they were these little tacos that had chocolate, and they were filled with ice cream. We could get those at this tiny little grocery store in my tiny little hometown of 300 people. A slip and slide in the front yard. Sleepovers with my cousins, fairs and concerts, pool time with my sisters and cousins. We didn't, we didn't live in town, so we didn't get to the pool very often. So pool time was actually kind of a special treat, so I remember that really fondly, being with my sisters or a cousin. Walking around with a boombox in our backyard. Playing tennis with my younger sister in our barn. We loved playing barn tennis, and then when we actually got, went on vacation and tried to play tennis on an actual tennis court, we realized our rules and our game was only fit for the barn. Playing Monopoly, soft serve ice cream cones. Just these, just a little soft serve ice cream cone. The, the special joy of that As I fast-forward to my teenage years, it is spending just countless time with my group of friends. We could do anything together and enjoy it. We baled hay and had a great time together. So these are not extravagant things when I look back on them. Most of 'em are pretty simple pleasures, and most of my summer memories stand out because of the people I was with, the deep connections and relationships. So think of yours, your, your simple pleasures from past summers, and then think of any new summer things you might wanna try. This is the time to take a golf lesson or to try making pizza on the grill. It's the time to take a road trip for the best summer pie in the Midwest or the best barbecue in the South. Whatever it is, embrace the season, embrace your simple joys, and embrace your time with your people. Really show up. Show up for them. Have spontaneous moments. Just grab a bag of chips and sit in the backyard together. Do the things with your kids and your grandkids, and if you're having any hang-ups about how you look, what you weigh, or whether you look graceful taking part in any activities, for the love of God, let that shit go. I want you to think back on spending time with really beloved people in your life. So, uh, grandparents, parents, babysitters, whoever those people were for you. So if you weren't lucky enough to have amazing, involved grandparents, who was it for you? Was it a neighbor down the street? Was it a babysitter? Think of that person that you think back on so fondly, and think about them in light of summers together. Really think of a joyful summer moment from your childhood. Does it even factor in what those people were wearing or what they weighed, what the number on the scale for them was? Do you think, "Oh, only, if m- only my grandma was, you know, a little bit thinner and just looked a little bit better in her summer outfit, that, that would've made a great memory." I mean, it's crazy to even think about that, right? It doesn't even factor in. Like, you have to even, like, stop and think, like, "Gosh, what did they wear? What were they even we-" It, it doesn't even factor into your memory. You're thinking about being with them. You know, some of my best memories, with grandparents are just spending time in the yard while my grandma was, in her garden, you know, just in her everyday clothes in her garden. Or going to visit my other grandma in her little apartment and we're all in the pool together. I have no idea what she was wearing. I just know she was there, and we were connecting, and then we'd order a pizza afterwards. It was fabulous. So don't even let these personal hangups for you factor in and get in between you and this magnificent moment you're having with your kids or your grandkids. Don't think, you know, "Oh, God, I'm carrying a few extra pounds. I should've lost that weight. I hate wearing a swimsuit. I didn't shave my legs today, so I can't go. I'm so pale I glow in the dark. I'm so out of shape. I can't do that. I can't canoe. I can't get in the canoe. I can't..." Stop it. Stop. Just go. Be present. Connect. Your kids and grandkids will remember you participating. That's it. Remember, being a good sport does not mean doing things well. It just means doing things. It just means being there, trying things, laughing at yourself, laughing with everyone around you. Just be there Also, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but no one is really looking at you. Really, no one cares. They're only thinking about themselves. Each one of us is so concerned with how we might be looking and how we might be perceived by other people, we forget to look and perceive how anyone else is dressed. So this is something called the spotlight effect. The spotlight effect is this cognitive bias where each of us really overestimates how much other people are noticing us, how much they're judging how we look, judging our behavior, judging any little mistake we make. Because each of us are naturally at the center of our own worlds, we incorrectly assume that we occupy this same central focus in the minds of everyone else. We don't. Everybody's only thinking about themselves. So just get over your hang-ups and go and be present. Okay. Let's also just take time to be. Be really present in the moment just with yourself. Look up. Notice things. Really slow down for the rest of this summer, for the rest of these 7 to 10 weeks of summer. Drop your shoulders, step outside, take a really deep breath. Notice the beautiful yards of your neighbors. Notice the flowers, the hummingbirds. Spend some time in the evening just watching lightning bugs. Just sit and watch the bugs. Notice the satisfying sound of cutting into a fresh, warm watermelon. It's amazing. Appreciate a perfect evening outside with live music. Appreciate just sitting next to the pool and not looking at your phone and not turning music on and not having to occupy your mind with something. Not reading, not doing anything, just sitting. Sitting by the pool with your kids or laying and let- feeling the sun on your skin. Just be present and slow down and take a deep breath. Okay, so to review, we have 7 to 10 precious weeks left of summer. Be intentional with your time, with your days, and with this precious season that we are in Create your second half of summer bucket list. Big things, small things, everything in between. Nothing's too small to put on a summer bucket list. Maybe you just want a freezy pop. Add it to the bucket list. And then appreciate it when you do it. Check it off the list. Make those tiny moments something meaningful and fun by checking them off your list Just show up for your people. So get over all your hangups, get over yourself already, and just show up and do the things. Slow down and be really present in each moment. This is just even when you're driving. Look up, notice the clouds, notice the thunderstorms. Fully appreciate each moment. If you take one thing from this episode, it is this: Be intentional with this summer Tuesday. Appreciate it. Be present in it. Do something you will look back on in the fall and winter and remember as quintessential summer. Wear the shorts, step outside, and fully appreciate the moment. All right, friends, until next week, stay upright, find the good, and if you can't find the good, at least make it funny. You can find me at bethrepp.com, hello@bethrepp.com, or Beth Repp Coaching on Facebook. And finally, the disclaimer: The content presented in this podcast is for general information only. Reliance on the information provided is done at your own risk. I just wanna leave you with a little story. So oftentimes we put so much pressure on ourselves to create the magical summer vacation or the magical summer moment. I will tell you, my family remembers probably the most fondly a crazy summer vacation we took to St. Louis. So right before we went, my parents had, their, their car was in the shop. The normal car was in the shop. So we pulled out the old car, which was an old 1979 Buick Electra, the car my sisters and I all drove through high school. We pulled out this old car. It had no functioning air conditioner. And we took the vacation that we had intended to take with the newer car. So we all get in this car with no air conditioning. It is brutally hot, and we do this road trip to St. Louis. The car overheated at every stoplight, so we would hope that it would keep going at the stoplights. We were trying to get to a motel. It was the Embassy Suites in St. Louis, and we could see it. It was like Big Ben on, in National Lampoon's Vacation. We could see it, but we could never get there. We drove and drove and drove trying to get to this Embassy Suites. My sisters and I were in the backseat with these sticky legs all stuck together. We were all fighting. We remember this vacation fondly 'cause it was so miserable and so hilarious. When we got back, my little sister wrote a story about it in, in school that was so funny. We all look back on that vacation as one of the best. So don't put any pressure on yourself. You can take the old car with no air conditioning and have a really hard time finding the hotel and all be fi- fighting, and years later, 35, 40 years later, you're all gonna be enjoying the memories of that. So decrease your expectations, let the pressure off, and just enjoy being together. Okay, guys, see you next Tuesday