Rose City Red Card
The unfiltered Portland Thorns podcast. Marissa bleeds rose. Alan is from Seattle, which makes things interesting.
Every episode: what actually happened in the Thorns' last match, what it means in the NWSL table, and at least one rant that goes too long.
Adults only. Bring a drink.
Episodes
11 episodes
August 30, 2026: One Point Is Better Than Zero
Gotham 1-1 Portland. A point on the road at the team top of the table, and Portland had 26% of the ball to get it.Jaedyn Shaw scored in the 60th. She admitted afterwards it was meant to be a cross. It still chipped Mackenzie Arnold, who...
August 24, 2026: Tobin Heath and 22,017 of Her Friends
Portland 1-0 Denver Summit, and Tobin Heath retired as a Thorn in front of 22,017 people. She signed a one-day contract to do it.Sophia Wilson scored in the 44th, assisted by Jessie Fleming. It was her tenth of the season and the fourth...
August 16, 2026: Hanks for Trying, Orlando
Portland 2-1 Orlando. Caiya Hanks came off the season-ending injury list on Friday, came on in the 88th minute, and won it in the 96th — her first match back after fourteen months out with a torn ACL.We were in the building on media cre...
August 10, 2026: The Most Anxiety Filled Win
Boston Legacy 3, Portland Thorns 4.Portland went three up inside nine minutes and thirty-eight seconds. That is the fastest three goals in NWSL history, thirty-five seconds quicker than the record Portland set themselves in July 2022. T...
August 2, 2026: F*ck a Six, We Need Center Backs
Utah 5, Portland 1. We recorded two hours after the whistle, Marissa on a mic at her parents' place in Las Vegas, and the argument she has been making for five straight episodes died on air. All season it has been the hole Sam Coffey left at th...
July 26, 2026: Don't F*ck with Providence Park
Portland 2, Gotham 2. A point against the league leaders, an eleventh straight home game unbeaten, and a club record — and none of it is the thing you remember. Emily Sonnett went down non-contact in the seventh minute and left Providence Park ...
July 19, 2026: Mile High Clash of the Captains
Denver 2, Portland 1. Our old MVP came home to Colorado, pulled on the wrong shirt, and assisted the winner, so we gave it a full night before we sat down. That turned out to be the right call for a Lindsey Heaps homecoming. Portland are unbeat...
July 14, 2026: The Coffey-Sized Hole in Our Midfield
Seattle 2, Portland 0. We watched the derby, stewed for two days, and then sat down at the bar to talk about it. The short version: the Thorns didn't show up. That's four trips to Lumen Field now without a single goal. Marissa's whole thing thi...
July 5, 2026: 4-0 and Second Place
Portland 4, Racing Louisville 0. Our first reaction episode: we watched it live, then broke it down with fresh eyes. The Thorns roll the last-place team, jump to 2nd in the NWSL, and we look ahead to a Cascadia derby at Seattle. Adults only — b...