Finding Peace Through Life's Ups and Downs | Meditation #0

Welcome to the first Greater Peace Meditation. 

Life is full of ups and downs. We experience joy and sorrow, abundance and loss, certainty and uncertainty. While we cannot control life's changing seasons, we can learn to return to the steady place within us. 

This lesson was inspired by the tragic loss of the Thai Buddhist Monks yesterday. Their lives were a light in this world, reminding us that peace is not something we simply hope for--it is something we practice and embody. One of the most meaningful ways we an honor those who have gone before us, those who are injured, and those who grieve, is to amplify our own light by choosing greater compassion, greater kindness, and greater peace in our daily lives.

In this beginner-friendly short guided meditation, you'll learn simple foundational meditation skills. These are skills I have used for years in my therapy practice and wellness courses, as well as powerful skills learned by Buddhist Monk teachers. These skills will help you learn how to become more present through focus on your breath, gently observe thoughts without becoming consumed by them, and return to your natural state of peace with kindness and compassion. 

Whether you are completely new to meditation or returning to your practice, this session offers a gentle invitation to slow down, reconnect with yourself, and remember that beneath the noise of life, peace is always available. 

May you be at ease. 
May you be peaceful. 
May you be free from suffering. 

Sādhu. Sādhu. Sādhu. 

If this lesson and meditation was meaningful to you, I'd love for you to subscribe and join me for future Greater Peace Meditations and other courses, where we will continue learning practical tools to cultivate resilience, self-compassion, inner wisdom, and greater peace.

*Subscribe to the Greater Peace Podcast for new episodes every Monday and Wednesday.*

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Guys. So I have been wanting to do this for a really long time. And uh I am I think I've just been like nervous about it. I don't really know how and what to do. But today just feels like, okay, just do it. And it and it could be because um this week has been quite transformative. It's been very, very difficult in a lot of ways for different reasons. Uh but also I think the push for me, maybe that it was today, is because I I don't know if um you know, but um I know like I've posted about it, but uh that there was a tragic accident yesterday where a lot of Buddhist monks have lost their lives. Um uh I uh there's numbers ranging from five to twelve, with many being injured, and we don't know all of the details yet. Uh but I just in praying for my um monk friends in Thailand and thinking of you, hoping that you're safe and that you are well, but also knowing that there is a lot of grief there. And I have had such a privilege of learning from um and following the monks, which started on the walk for peace, but then also spending time with them when they returned home from the walk to for peace in Fort Worth, and then um going back for the Visak uh celebration in Fort Worth and getting to chant the Tipitaka, the Buddha's teachings in the Pali language with them. Um I was there for 10 days and it just uh the light, every single one, I think, when I walk past them, the energy of love and peace that flows from them and genuine just kindness is uh something that I think we need more of, not less of. And so I just, you know, well, you know, today I'm just gonna share a little message with you about something that I learned that but I think that um I just think that it's like with the loss of these monks that for those of us who have had the privilege of learning from them, that um all of us can shine a little brighter, be more kind and more loving to honor um the lessons that we have um learned from getting to watch any one of them. Um or and also the ones that we haven't known, just knowing that these are humans that um have uh see so much value in the teachings of the Buddha, um the tea the message of loving-kindness, the message of um how to live with more peace in our lives, and they sacrifice their lives to carry the mantle of the Buddha to each one of us. And I just I just want to um honor them and all of my monk friends who are grieving today, and um and just be brave. So here we go. I have wanted to teach a meditation class for a while. Many of you know I'm a mental health therapist in uh Linden, Utah. My practice is called Greater Peace. I help people who have experienced um trauma, a lot of trauma, betrayal trauma, and then also work with addiction. Um and I uh in this work, it is just so interesting. The the skills and the things that I see that are most effective. Uh, I have been able to take and use, like to create a wellness course that I teach. Um and but I just keep feeling like, oh, I wish everybody could feel this and know this for themselves. I have such a sincere desire for people to feel um what I feel or what I see others feel when um when they connect to their truest nature or learn how to live with more grace for themselves and for others, or peace, or to know your worth and value is absolute and that is unchangeable no matter what. Um, we can disappoint, we can be harmful, but our worth and value is absolute. We're just flawed and we're just in a process of learning, and that's what we're here for. It's like the worth and value of the intelligence or energy or soul, whatever word you want to use, that um animates this body is um uh the the worth is absolute. And um, but these are the experiences that we are here to learn from. And some of us uh walk very difficult paths, and I just with uh just love and compassion for those who do um want to say that um there is light, and I hope that this is something that is meaningful or helpful in some way to help you find that worth and value and help you know how to um share it with others. One of the greatest um gifts I think has been having my um Buddhist monks uh teachers. So either through being in Fort Worth or watching them online, but also that I get to go to the Watlau Budaram in West Valley, Utah, and learn from a John Nate who was and and and a John Vilisek, and both of them were on the Walk for Peace. And uh they just have the most um loving and kind nature. And I've learned so much from them. And so we do a meditation class on Sunday, and I just keep feeling like I want to be able to teach other people this and also pair it with some of the other things that I'm learning, like I'm reading the Dao Te Ching and the Quran and um the teachings of Jesus, and you know, anything. I just I love learning anything that makes me feel like I want to be a more kind and compassionate person, is uh it's just like I just can't get enough of it because um yeah, I mean, it's just there's uh peace is accessible in this life and I uh and it's found within. It's not something that we can find outside. It is something that we can find within and then share um to help others find it as well. So that is my devotion to the monks who have lost their lives and those who are grieving. It is also very much my passion and what I have been working on for the last few years. So meditation class, that's what we're doing. I think on Thursdays, probably. Uh, it's it's just starting anything is new and terrifying because I'm also in the process of learning. So uh I will teach you what I know and then hopefully it evolves because um everything should constantly be in a process of uh evolving because there's just so much to learn and so many people to learn from. So um, okay, what I kind of think the format will be going forward is I will teach you a little something that maybe will help um maybe connect to more your true nature. And then um after that, I would like to do like lead a meditation um to teach you how to do it. If you don't meditate, I the thing that I hear all the time is people are always saying, like, I'm not good at it. I can't make my thoughts, my brain be quiet. And it's like, well, the good news is that under the threat of torture, you could not make your brain be quiet for more than, or like for more than a minute, if you could even get to a minute. It's it's just impossible. But that is the greatest thing about it, about meditation is that you are learning that you are not the thoughts. You are the observer of those thoughts. But that's part of the process of living, right? So our past um fears and experiences and pains are the things that inform us, uh make our brain, like condition our brain to think of what we should be afraid of in the future. And so learning how to observe the thoughts helps us to not be reactive to them. When we are reactive, uh, I love Eckhart Tolle says that it's like being possessed by an entity of your past self, uh, which is just another way of saying it's like your 13-year-old got in the driver's seat and is trying to handle the situations um that you are facing as for me, like a 49-year-old, you know? And it's my 13-year-old self absolutely uh did not know how to do life as a 49-year-old, but she sure tries sometimes when I'm reactive. But if I can slow down, observe my thoughts, then I can respond in a way that is consistent with who I want to be in this world, which is integrity, I believe. And the only way to have peace is integrity. Integrity or uh peace is the natural um consequence or the natural outcome or the good karma of um of being true to who you want to be in the world. And we're not that all the time, we're not perfect. So that's kind of gets me to what I wanted to teach for today, because I think that that was the thing that pushed me to this is it. And maybe it's this is where I want to start, and maybe it's because um of the week uh this week and some of the different events that have gone on, but I just um I'll read it to you and then and then um kind of discuss it a little bit. So uh I have a book, I'll put it down in the description. Um I have a book that is um like this year I'm focusing on meditations um from the Dao De Ching. It's incredible the energy of it. I read it all the way through. The I read the Dao De Ching, but this meditation book kind of breaks down each one of the sections and um and then every day I read it and then I create a practice for myself for that day. Um so today's though hit a little different because I have been thinking a lot about what the hard things. Um my birthday was on Monday, and I wanted to uh there were a lot of, there's a lot of baggage and a lot of hurt that I have been carrying um from childhood. But I honestly have come to the point where I feel like I have used all of it to evolve, to grow. And I don't think I would be who I am um without those things. So I give up the need to have a different past. As difficult as um things may have been, I think that it's just all of it. I wouldn't give up any of it if I ended up being a different version of myself than I am now. And it doesn't mean that I'm perfect. It just means that I know that I'm not perfect and there's such a relief in that because I'm not afraid at looking at where I'm flawed. Um, sometimes I am though. It's hard, you know. But it's like I'm not, I'm not afraid if somebody tells me I did something that's hurtful. I want to know. I want to uh gain more awareness about it so that I can change it. Um so um I have been thinking a lot about how funny it was that I was just like, I'm gonna set down all of these hard things. This is gonna be my rebirth day. Um, but silly me uh forgot that before any resurrection, which I, you know, there's um teachings of a physical resurrection, but I think for every physical um there is a spiritual rule, like um the law of cause and effect is the spiritual law can be called karma, right? Um, but I think that for me, it's like learning that um like death and resurrection. Adam Miller talks this, ta teaches this a lot. He is really great. You can look up books on him. Uh he he, I think he's a professor at Baylor. He teaches and researches a lot um Christ like love and different things like that. And so he uh taught. Um he I remember it just striking me once when he I heard him talking about how the process of change is a continual process of death and resurrection. You die and resurrect all the time through the process of growing and learning. We have to let old patterns die in order to become new and make space for new ones. And so um, this today this kind of hit me. So it was um the meditation of today was we return to our breathing. It knows exactly what to do, rising and falling without conscious control, in the same way that we sometimes have an excess, and sometimes we have a lack. We sometimes assert ourselves, and sometimes we hold back. We sometimes succeed and sometimes fail completely. Our practice is to see all this without abandoning ourselves. And then uh he goes on to teach that sustainable growth is such an oxymoron. Growth can never be sustained. Having must give way to losing, or there will be no room to have again. Living must give way to dying, or there will be no room to live again. Success will eventually lead to failure, which will lead us again to success. This is the necessary rhythm of life. And I loved that in um like with meditation, it's like all of the things that um like I can teach CBT, I can do like cognitive behavioral therapy, we can do EMDR, we can do all these things. But I think with every client, I teach meditation because it is the one thing uh that is enormously effective with everyone. Um, and it's what I teach in my wellness courses. Um and so I have been thinking about that lot a lot, that it's so simple. This rhythm of life is a constant inhale and exhale. We inhale and we receive, and we exhale and we um lose or release, and then we inhale again and we receive again, and that is the natural flow of life. Um, I think there's uh the central theme in the Dao Re Ching is trusting the natural rhythm of life rather than resisting it. And that can be super hard, but it is also necessary. The Buddha taught um uh anika or impermanence. Um, one of the Buddha's core teachings is that every conditioned thing arises and then it passes away. Um, that when we resist the impermanence of things, we cling to them, and then there's anxiety and suffering. Um, and you know, I was thinking, I think like last year, I was uh just studying some things, and it just totally hit me that happiness is a skill. Like it's it's not just an emotion because we have a very hard time holding on to happiness because the second that we experience it, our brain immediately, because of our conditioned mind, will immediately kick up a fear that we will lose this feeling. But we will. We won't always be happy. The trick is to learn how to be in the present moment, to fully embrace the happiness and then to allow it to go when it goes. Um, and so there uh it's like clinging is suffering, um, clinging to the idea of what should be. Um, this is like uh all of the things that we experience in this life are for our learning and our growth and our development and our evolution. Um and I think we are all trying to evolve into being more than just five sensory beings. That's a lot talked about in The Seat of the Soul by Gary Zukov. It's uh it's like what we what we truly desire is um to develop deeper sensory, to enhance our intuition, to slow down and not react so that we don't act in a way that is not how we want to be. I think if we want, I think we all want to have peace, right? And uh peace is the good karma or the natural consequence of living true to who you want to be in the world in this world, which is true to our truest nature. And our truest nature is peace. And and so when we live and we are peaceful with others and we are peaceful with ourselves, then we are more loving, we are more kind, and we are more capable of healing. Um so I'm just looking down. Um yeah, I think it's like the Buddha teaches um it's an Anapanasati, I think. I just learned um Pali language and I might not be pronouncing that right, but the Anapanasati sutta is where the Buddha teaches awareness to breathing. Um, because it embodies effortless change. We're doing it all of the time. Um, it's just you cannot hold on to the inhale forever. We want to receive and then hold on to that forever, but we would die. And so we must exhale, we must release to make room for the next thing that we will receive. Um, I think it's like that's consistent in many spiritual teachers. It's like uh Jesus in Luke 17, 33, um, said, Whosoever tries to preserve his life will lose it, but whoever loses it will keep it. And to me, in researching and like studying, and uh from my understanding, is it's like, okay, well, what is that to preserve his life? And to me, I think those are we try to hold on to the false identities, right? It's like um as we're growing up and we're learning and developing, we're always trying um to be accepted by other people. So I mean, I think it an easy example is like you're in third grade, our brains in that developmental stage are starting to determine who we are or our worth or whatever, based on how our peers interact with us. And if nobody's playing with it at recess, we start to look around and see, oh my gosh, why are they playing with them, but not me? Maybe it's because I need to change the way I dress or do my hair different or act different. And then we get the reward of everybody going, oh yeah, no, hey, we want to play with you. So now this is the new me because the old me is not good enough and this isn't okay. Or when you experience different traumas, like for example, a negative cognition that I had or a negative belief that I had about myself was when my parents, um, I remember vividly uh when my mom told us that she and my dad were getting divorced, and I was little, I think I was around five. And I absolutely remember thinking, as a five-year-old would, I'm just gonna be a really, really good girl and I'm gonna mind, and then my dad won't want to leave. And um, because I don't have development or understanding of the broader world and um why parents get divorced. All you know, we're all egocentric in our development. And so we all feel like it is us that is the problem. Um, and and it needs to be us because then we can control it. Um, because then I just got to change this thing about myself, and then this hurt that I'm terrified of will go away. And um So then when my dad and mom divorce, the only rational understanding that I have of that is, oh my gosh, it was because I was not good enough. So then, you know, uh, my uh when anybody in my family is sad, it's my fault. Um, and it it's it's very egocentric, totally. And all of us as adults can go, what? Why would you think that? You know, but it's like when you think of the development of a five-year-old's brain and the way that we are there, our identity is very much made by our um our immediate family and our interactions with them. And when you experience something difficult, it can alter your own perception of who you are in the world. Um, and so then that gets reconfirmed when I can't sit still in my seat because ADHD, but it's like when I can't sit still in my seat and I'm in trouble in class, it's because I'm not good enough. When I don't get good grades, it's because I'm not good enough. When I don't get asked to a dance, it's because I'm not good enough. When my boyfriend breaks up with me, it's because I'm not good enough. And it just reconfirms that over and over and over until you can find it and then you see it and you go, oh, okay. That's not what that was at all. Now I can use my now development to give different understanding and have compassion for my little self that was just trying to make sense of very difficult things. So that's the long way at a kind of deviation off, but to kind of show the point of these are false identities, right? Um uh the I am not good enough or I am not um lovable or whatever. And so we try to put on personas is another way of explaining it, which means masks, ways that we cover up who we really are to try to get acceptance from other people. Uh, the one uh it there's a Sufi saying that is the soul is covered by a thousand veils. And I love that saying so much because it's like the the truest essence of who we are is absolute worth and value. But the process of living this life with a brain that is ruled until the frontal cortex develops, and even sometimes after that, it's uh our brain is ruled by this idea of um uh fear, right? We see everything through fear. Our brain is constantly in a state of the world is on fire and we're gonna die, and I don't have what I need. It's like the core three fears are I don't belong, I don't have what I need, and I'm powerless. And so that has been um something that it's like when when we can learn to um like with our frontal lobe, kind of like look at how we think about ourselves in this world, then we are able to finally pull those things back. Um, but um so it's like releasing those things that we think we are. There are other identities are I think I am, like I'm a therapist, but I am not a therapist. I do therapy for work. I um I like this is what I'm doing, but it's not who I am. And um, or like the stuff that we have, or we're always trying to prove that we're successful and stuff. And I think that one of the most powerful lessons that I've ever had in my life is um watching my son die. Um, and then both of my grandparents, who I was very close to. Um, and it's just especially with my grandparents, it was like um uh it's like you work your whole life and they had so much stuff, and they died within uh my grandma unexpectedly passed on um after his after my grandpa's funeral. And they had worked their whole lives to build this life, to have their house, their stuff, and it all mattered so much. And then they died, and they don't even take the clothes on their back, you know, and and then we just throw away all this stuff that mattered so much. And it was just such an important lesson to me that it's like um none of this stuff we come in. Uh, I read something the other day that was like, we come into this world with nothing and we spend our whole lives trying to obtain everything, and then we leave with nothing again. And so it's like, make sure along the way that you are building memories and love and kindness and that you live with fulfillment and simplicity is everything. Uh, and so it's just, yeah. Uh so anyway, so whoever tries to preserve his life, whoever tries to preserve these identities that they think they are, but are not, we'll lose it. We'll lose, we'll miss the opportunity to discover the truest nature of who we are, which is absolute worth and value for all of us. I think I love like the image of the cross because the vertical connection or the vertical vertical post is like our only connection is between us and the divine, or us and um the source of all life, or us and God, or um it's like that's the only vertical connection that we have. Everything else is horizontal. We're all here in different experiences because it is what our soul needs to learn from. And some people carry such a heavy load. And uh why would we ever want to think ourselves above or below them? We should use what we have and um the privileges that we have to lift and help. Um, I think that that to me is why Jesus was the most clear on um love and compassion. I think that that uh I was in Hawaii two years ago and um walked into this little shop and um this little um Hindu uh teacher in a toga comes around the corner. It was so random. And he just starts talking to me about mindfulness. And I was in the process of learning, but he didn't know like what I was trying to reconcile some stuff in learning, different things. But I didn't bring any of it up, but he still, I don't know, is just he just started talking to me about, you know, when Jesus says this about the just king, um he's that comes from my tradition. And he started drawing connections between all spirituality and spiritual beliefs and showing me and then the common root. He said, What are, what do all of them say? And it's like love and compassion is everything. It's the common message. And he said, Yes, and he said, What do you know then? And it was just like that God is literally everywhere and in everything. And then I just had this overwhelming desire to turn over every rock, to see God in every person. I think that's one of the things I love in Buddhism is uh, well, in Eastern religion, it's like the when they bow to each other, it's uh I read somewhere somebody saying that it's like you are bowing to the sacred mystery in the other, that the divine is within them as well as you. We are all images of God. And if I bow to the image of God in you, then it is saying to you, um, like I see that you reflect the divine. I think for me, it's like if I want to know the entire expansiveness of the divine, then I have to be able to see it in all of creation. And um, and like you reflect the divine in a way that is unique specifically to you. And I want to know that part of the divine. And so if I can live truly with that energy, then I can see myself as that and know what it means to love others as myself. Um, to know that I have absolute worth and value and I'm flawed, and that must be absolutely true for everybody else, if it is true for me. Um, I think like Jesus talks about the paradox of not grasping but allowing, if you try to hold on to the identities that you have taken on in this form, then you will lose the opportunity to find. I think in the Gospel of Thomas, um, it's I I'm not gonna be able to remember it exactly, but it's like if you bring forth that which is that Jesus taught Thomas, the if you bring forth that which is within you, it has the power to save you. Um, but if you do not, it will destroy you. And um, I think that's so much because you find who you truly are by letting go of all of the ideas of who you think you should be to get acceptance. Um like Muhammad in the Quran said, uh I think it's Quran 94, 5 through 6 says, indeed with hardship comes ease. It doesn't say ease follows hardship, it says it comes with that. Um yeah. So um I think ultimately it's like going back to it's like the inhale is receiving, the exhale is letting go, receive and release, right? And so um I think that that's why it's so powerful sometimes just learning how to slow our brains down to just focus on the one most simple thing, which is just our breath. Uh it's the one automatic thing that we can control, and it affects everything. Our entire nervous system is connected to that. Um so uh I think like Jesus taught, um, life comes through surrender, not grasping um that it's like seeds first must fall to the ground and die before they can bear fruit. And so ultimately, the whole message of this, I would say, is beginning the process of releasing the idea of perfection, learning how to give ourselves grace and know we don't know everything yet, learning how to give others grace and know that in a moment when they act, they are acting. It's like forgiveness is giving up the need or giving up the idea that they could have done anything different in that moment, because if they could have, they would have. Um, it's just usually, you know, I it's like when I'm talking about shame, it's like, I should have done it this way or whatever. And and it's like, well, every time you say that, it's like, well, the reason why you know that now, the reason why you couldn't make that decision is because you didn't know what you know now. Um, because a part of you before had the courage to move on what it knew. And then it learned through the experience of it. And so it's just when we know better, we do better is real. Um and I think that for all of us, we if I look back over my life, it's like, are there things that I did that I wouldn't choose now? Yeah, absolutely. But also I um I know that in that moment I was doing, I was doing what I thought I had to do. And then I learned through the experience of doing it. And then I can um go to others and um apologize and whatever. I think that's one of the things in the Bible that gets me is that Jesus taught metanoia. Um, metanoia is meta and anoia, the roots of those words, um, mean to overcome the small self. So it's overcoming the fearful mind. Um, in the New Testament, 366 times we're given the command, do not fear. And so it's it's like all of that together, it's like overcoming the fearful mind. But really, what it means in the definition of metanoia in Greek is uh that it's like keep moving, keep growing, keep learning from these experiences. Um, I think uh it's uh Saint Gregory of Nisa said that sin is a refusal to keep growing. And and um it's just being stuck, uh doing the same thing and not using the experience to grow and make a change and do something different. And that's such a difference because and then it makes sense that metanoia, um, if if that is what sin is, and sin, the word used in the Bible, the Greek word means to miss the point or miss the mark. You're missing the point of what you were supposed to learn here. But um essentially, but the the um the flip side or the opposite of that would be metanoia, which is translated to repentance, which people turned into in different places. It's not always, but in different places, it can be a very shaming process. And so I think that um there's just a lot to learn in all of that, that it's like grace is everything, it's not only what we receive, but it's what we give to ourselves and others. So let's do a little meditation because this is this is a long one. Um I hope that it lays foundations enough to be able to kind of help everything that we go on. It won't be this long always, but then, you know, who knows? I'm just going with whatever it is that comes to my mind. And if it's beneficial, that's great. If it's not, that's okay too. Um, okay. So in meditation, uh, like I'm sitting, I have, I don't know if you can see it. Let me see if I can. This little cushion thing. You don't have to have that. You can sit on a chair. You can sit on the ground. Um, I sit on this for support. Um, you can sit cross-legged if you want to. If you can't do that, then sit on a chair. There are times when a John Nate is teaching us at What Lao Budaram, but I can only follow online because I have a lot of things going that day. And so while he's teaching, I'm meditating by being very present and conscious of my breath while I'm maybe cooking something. Like I'm chopping onions, but I'm only chopping onions. So, um, but try a sitting meditation um and see if this is helpful. We'll do a short one. This one will only be five minutes. Uh, if you've done meditation before, it will go really fast. Um, but if you have not, five minutes can be difficult, but I um but I want to teach you some things that Ajahn Nate and Ajahn Vilasak taught me that were super helpful for it. And just remember the the goal is not to stop thought, it is to observe yourself thinking, essentially. Um and to be able to return to the breath, return to the present moment. Um, our brain constantly wants to think about the bad things that have happened to us in the past, and then uh like past fears and past hurts inform um uh past fears and hurts inform future uh worries and concerns, right? So we're all the future isn't even real. I love when Eckhart Tolle says this, and then when I finally got it, it's like the future isn't real. None of us have ever been there, it's only an idea. Because as soon as you get there, it's the present, right? So we're constantly worrying about what's coming up, but it's all based on what we haven't healed that's in the past. And so our brain is constantly telling us that the worst case scenario is coming next. This is the process, meditation for me, one of the things has been the process of connecting back to peacefulness and presence. Eckart Tolle also has said that uh when you're thinking about the future, there's problems, right? But when you live in the present, uh everything that arises is a challenge. And you're 100% successful at handling the challenges that you have faced thus far. Even if you didn't handle them in the way that you wanted to have handled them, you learned through the process of it, and so it was enough. So um, let's do this. If you sit down, you can sit in a chair, you can sit on the ground um in lotus position if you want. You flip your foot up. I that's um when we did the overnight meditation with Bante Panyakara in um in Fort Worth. It's like, oh, how am I gonna do this overnight? And then uh he taught us a trick for that. I'll talk a little bit more about that, how to do that when you start to feel pain in your body and stuff. But as you sit down and get comfortable, then you just take a deep breath. One of the things that a John Nate taught me is I was I was really struggling to feel peace about a situation and to feel compassion for somebody. And and um I asked him what I need to do, and he said that I needed to practice the virtue, like essentially, of selfishness, like selfishness as a virtue, um, which I'm like, okay, say more about that, because what? Um, that is not what I've been taught, but it's the way he said it was so beautiful. It's like you have to, if you want to be able to help, you have to take time for yourself. You have to um sit and breathe. And then he said, your mind is peaceful. Your mind is uh is peace. And so you just need to give it the opportunity to bring that peace back to you. Don't try to feel compassion, don't try to feel peace, don't try to do anything, just be the peace that you are. I tell people all the time, it's like this life is not about becoming anything, it is about unbecoming everything you are not. And I I've heard that in a bunch of different places, but I think that that is so impactful. So John Nate says, your mind is peace. The truest nature of who we are, the intelligence, the energy, the soul, our truest nature is peace. So we are trying to give space to feel that. So, in as we sit, we breathe in, and he gives different um uh different methods, which I will show you a little bit. Um, and then um John Vilasek um he taught me this method that really helps me so much because we can get discouraged that our brain keeps wandering. So use this skill. The way he had me visualize it, the way I interpreted what he was saying was it's like our minds to the point that we begin trying to um be present and um and like just breathe. Um it's like a wild animal. Our brain has been able to do whatever it wants, our conditioned mind wants to do whatever it wants, it wants to scream that everything's on fire and everything's going down and nobody likes us all the time, and just go, oh, we got to get this done, we gotta get this done. And so he said to view it as a wild animal. And the way that I do this is if I am sitting here and I am breathing, and I all of a sudden notice that I am thinking about something. I, as soon as I become aware that I am not focused on my breathing, but I'm thinking about something else, then I'm back to the present moment. I'm aware again. And so I want there, you can picture any wild animal that you want, but I want my mind to want to be with me, right? So I have to train it. So um I visualize it as okay, if you're gonna train an animal, uh I am not gonna shame it, I'm not gonna punish it, I'm not gonna do anything like that. I'm going to just gently wander out. Of course it wandered off. That's what they do. I'm gonna gently wander out, get it, bring it back. Uh, I visualize, I don't know why mine is a cow. It just is. So I visualize myself just kind of sitting and I'm breathing. And then I uh notice, oh, I gotta make sure I get this done. And then what about this? And what about, and then all of a sudden I'm like, oh, okay, this is my in breath, this is my outbreath. And then it's like, okay. Then I visualize myself just gently bringing the cow back. Sitting her down by me, giving her a treat, and then giving her a pet. I love her. And I want her to stay with me, but I want her to want to stay with me. And so then I just go back to breathing. Then uh when she wanders again, I just gently go and get her. There's no judgment, there's no upset, there's nothing going wrong. The actually the process of recognizing that you're no longer present is such an important muscle to learn how to build to be able to control reaction. So let's uh try that a little bit. I'll just give you little prompts, but we're mostly gonna be quiet and we'll just go for five minutes. I want you to focus on this is my in-breath, this is my out breath. You can say that in your mind. There's a couple of other tricks that I can teach you over time. Um, or a John Nate also does short breath in, short breath out, long breath in, long breath out. Then back to short breath, back to long breath, back and forth. Um, and the reason why you're doing that is just you're just really focusing on just that you're breathing and that you're in this present moment. And then as you observe thoughts come in, you just bring them back. There's no judgment. It's okay. That's what your brain's gonna do. Of course it is, but you're starting to learn, especially when you have a thought that comes up that makes you feel really anxious or fearful, you will recognize, okay, I need to um it's like you you start to recognize that it's like um like you feel it in your body, the anxiety, but then you just go, okay, back to my breath. That's not something I need to worry about right now. Because your brain is constantly bringing things like, hey, you need to get this done. Hey, you're failing at this, hey, you're whatever. And you're just not going to react to it because you have devoted this time right now. There's nothing else to do except for this. So um let's start that. So just get comfortable.

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You can close your eyes, short breath in, short breath out, long breath in, long breath out.

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If you hear any sounds in your area around you, just let them become a part of it. Just have awareness of it, and then let it go.

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And go back to the breath.

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If you notice any discomfort in your body or attention of trying to do something, just let it go.

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You're just breathing. If you wonder, just gently bring it back.

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This is my in-breath. This is my outbreath.

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Focus on your breathing. If you've wandered, just gently come back.

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If you feel tension in your body, take all of your attention to where that space is. Just say tension, tension, tension, or pain, pain, pain.

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And then this is my in-breath. This is my outbreath.

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Okay.

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Five minutes is pretty short. But maybe you can feel more relaxation in your body after you do it. Um as you build up and you're able to do it more. That's great. But really honestly, um, I think it's like Eckhart Tolli is like you're breathing all day, just be conscious of three of them. Just while you're doing something, if you stop at a stoplight, instead of picking up your phone, our brain is constantly in production mode. Just slow down and just be next time you pull up to a stoplight, every time you hit a red light, all you're doing is focusing on your breathing. This is my in-breath. This is my outbreath. And just focusing on that, not where you're headed, not where you need to do, whatever. Just give your mind an opportunity to just feel peace for a moment. Um, I think one of the things I love if you IFS internal family systems is a is a therapy um skill taught by Richard Schwartz. But during a training um that I was at that he was doing, it was like everybody was worried about what to do next and what to say, and what if I say the wrong thing. And if somebody says this, what do I do? And one of the most um profound teachings in that is he said, when you are connected to your truest self, you will always, always know what to do next. And I think that that was so profound because it's like um when you don't know what to do, when you're scrambling, when you're feeling panic, rise up, just stop, breathe, connect back to your truest self when you feel compassion, creativity, uh, mindful curiosity, all of those things are the energy of our truest nature of who we are. So anyway, I hope that this was helpful. I don't intend for all of them uh to be this long, but then again, who knows if you know me? Who knows? But I hope that it was helpful and I hope that you um enjoy learning with me um over time. Uh the course that I do is an eight-week course. Um I am working right now on making it a one Saturday, like breaking it into two, um, but just doing like one Saturday, and the whole focus is on really understanding the way that our brains work or the way that this form um impacts the way that we connect to ourselves and um building confidence if you struggle with negative self-talk. This is absolutely so helpful for that. Um, but uh when I get that together, if that's something you're interested in, I'll let you know um when I'm doing that. But uh I hope that you are all well and happy and peaceful and to my monk friends. Um thank you for um being my teachers and my friends. And I am thinking of you, and I hope that you feel um peace.