How to Stop Reacting | Meditation #2

*Dive deeper with the full Conversation Episode next!*

Before we can change our reactions, we first have to develop the ability to notice them.

In this week’s meditation, Amy introduces the foundation of one of the most life-changing skills we can learn: mindfulness. Drawing on the wisdom of Viktor Frankl, Eckhart Tolle, and contemplative traditions, she explores how presence creates the space between life’s challenges and our automatic reactions.

Through practical examples and a guided 10-minute meditation, you’ll begin strengthening your ability to return to the present moment—whether you’re driving, cooking, walking, spending time with loved ones, or simply breathing. Like any muscle, mindfulness becomes stronger with practice, giving you greater awareness of your thoughts, emotions, and conditioned patterns.

This meditation serves as the foundation for Wednesday’s conversation, where Amy and Ryan take a deeper look at why we react the way we do and introduce a practical skill to help you interrupt automatic patterns and choose your response with greater intention.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

Why mindfulness is the first step to lasting change.
How presence helps quiet the conditioned mind.
Simple ways to practice mindfulness throughout your day.
A guided meditation to strengthen awareness and inner peace.

Peace begins within. And every moment of mindful awareness is an opportunity to choose who you want to become.

*Subscribe to the Greater Peace Podcast for new episodes every Monday and Wednesday.*

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Hi everybody, my name is Amy Lindstrom, and welcome to the Greater Peace podcast. Today is another meditation episode. So, just as a reminder, we do meditations where I introduce a topic. Those are released every Monday. And then we do a conversations episode with me and Ryan. Eventually we'll have interviews and things like that, but that will happen on those will be released on Wednesday, and we're gonna deep dive into the topic that we um that I introduced on Monday. So this week's topic, we are going to kind of build on what we were talking about last week. So last week we were talking a lot about the conditioned mind and the way that our beliefs are and reactions are connected to the way that we experience the world and the way that our brain understands things. We're gonna go even a little bit deeper into that. And today or on Wednesday, I'm going to give you a practical skill that is going to help you begin to practice more mindfulness in your reactions. So if there is a time when you seem to like lose your patience or get super annoyed with somebody, or there's just um like something that just kind of triggers, triggers is kind of like a uh it's just become like a fad word everybody wants to say all the time. But what I'm talking about, um, I will discuss more on Wednesday, where there's a stimulus that triggers a um automatic response of your nervous system. So we will talk a little bit more about that on Wednesday, but this I just wanted to introduce you a little bit to the topic. So um the quote that I wanted to tell you is I didn't know if you have read A Man's Search for Meaning by Victor Frankel. I highly recommend it. It is such an excellent book and um one that has been super influential on me. Also, when I was studying psychology in my undergrad, I got a lot of exposure to Victor Frankel and the way that he thinks about the world, and which is obviously informed by his experience as a prisoner in Auschwitz. And I think that he has um such a powerful perspective of uh experiencing hardship and the ways to make sense of it, or the um the ways that human beings um react to the negative cognitions we build, or the negative or the difficult experiences that we have. So the quote that I love from him is everything can be taken from a man but one thing, the last of the human freedoms, the choice, or to choose one's attitude in any given circumstance, to choose one's own way. And I love that so much because it really is speaking of being mindful, of beginning the process of understanding why you do what you do, why are you losing your patience over and over with your kids or with your spouse or with somebody at work or whatever it is. It's like, why do you keep doing that? Why are you betraying who you want to be in the world? And it almost feels like, as Eckhart totally says, like you're possessed by an entity of your past self, where it's like something takes over you and you're super reactive. And maybe sometimes, and a thing that I like to ask people is if you can think back to the last time you were freaking out or blowing up, can you just sit with and think, how old did I feel in that moment? And sometimes that gives you some clues and indicators like what was going on in that life, a program that was written. Come back on Wednesday because I'm gonna help you understand more of why that is what happens in brain development. So I think that one of the most impactful skills that all of us can learn is to begin to engage the frontal lobe, to engage the process of mindfulness, being aware of our awareness, being aware of what we are doing in the moment. There is also so much, all the joy, all of the happiness that we can experience is being able to keep our brain in a present moment. Sometimes I remember once telling Ryan that I feel like happiness is a skill. It isn't a state of being. Because as soon as we become happy, our programmed mind, then all of a sudden is immediately feeling the tension of this moment disappearing because it will, right? But so then we don't even stay in the happiness because of the fear of losing it. And then we've already lost it. So we are going to start to work on and practice mindfulness. Meditation helps us to do this as well. So one of the things that you can do is uh, let's say today, whatever tasks you're doing, if you are cooking, um it's like just cut the vegetables, just cook. Like you're noticeing how your mind wants to spin out on all the stresses of the day and what went wrong and whatever, and you're not even aware of what you're doing in the moment. The perfect example of all of this that anybody who drives can connect to is if you think about all of the times we drive from one place to another, and when we arrive at the other place, it's like this weird feeling of uh, I don't even remember driving here. Like you remember getting in your car, but maybe it's like you weren't even aware. You just somehow ended up there, which is an automatic process of the brain. But it is an evidence that our brain has this ability to kind of go offline to everything that we are doing, but it creates a sense of suffering because we're never really truly in the present. And in the present, that's where all of our power is, all of our power for change, all of our power for living true to who we want to be in the world, which is integrity, which brings peace, um, and then eventually creates virtue. So I just want you to think about and maybe put into practice when you're driving, just drive. Notice what you're driving or what you're doing. Turn off the music and just be aware that you are driving. Um, it's just consciously trying to do that. When you're a child or somebody is talking to you, just be aware that you are listening to them, being present in that moment. You will find that there is a lot of joy to be had in this life in the very simple things. There's a lot of quotes about how the um the most joyful people in the world understand that the highest amount of joy is in the simple moments. And the simple moments really is just presence. So there is an example that I heard Eckhart Tolle give once that I think is such a powerful one. He talks about how when you see a sunset, you see how beautiful it is, right? Um, I'm gonna say sunset, but like for me, it's the ocean, especially in Hawaii. It's the ocean, period. But in Hawaii, and I picture um a spot in Kauai that I love to go to um where I can just sit and look out over the ocean as the sun is rising in the morning. And it's like there is this stillness that happens in my body as I am sitting there. It's the easiest place in the world for me to be present. But I want you to think of something maybe that where is the place in your life in the world where you feel that just awe. It can be in the mountains, it can be literally anywhere, right? Um I think one of the magical things being a new grandma, it's like one of the magical things about being a grandparent is that there is almost this forced absolute presence when I am with our little Jack. And I just I could watch him make faces all day. Time just passes, and I I just hours could go on. I would get bored doing almost anything else, but in that moment, it's just everything he does is so magical and precious, and and it's just, I don't know, it it gives me this expansive feeling, the wonder of life, and all of that. So find and think about those moments that you experience in anything that you do or places that you've been. I'm gonna use a sunset as an example because I think we can all connect to the idea that there have been moments where we turn and see a sunset and we're just like, whoa, that is so beautiful. So this is, and this is the example that Eckhart Tully gave. And he was talking about how in when you see a sunset, there is this moment of awe and wonder when you see it, right? You have about three to four seconds before your conditioned brain comes in and goes, that's a sunset, we've labeled it because that's what our brain likes to do. That's a sunset, and now we're gonna judge it. I like this one because it has more pink, or it has more of this, or it's more orange, which would totally be the one that I like the most. But it's we start to label it based on preferences that our brain has set up and all of that, and it knocks us out of that moment of awe and wonder. It's just it just changes the quality of it. But the thing that Eckhart was teaching is that that moment of awe and wonder, the reason why it feels so magical, we attribute that to the sunset. But the reality of it is that that is what presence feels like. To be present in any given moment and to just look at something with awe and wonder, anything. Um, one of the most profound moments that I had, like a spiritual moment in a sense, was um I was reading the book uh Immortal Diamond by Richard Rohr. And just, and I think I had just read um Universal Christ. And so I'm on this Richard Rohr high of everything, you know, just connecting to everything on a spiritual level. And I see this little cricket outside of my RV window, and I just looked at it and thought there are thousands of these, um, especially at that season. And I was just looking at this one and just contemplating its existence, not as a species, but as an individual. And there was just the most profound moment of like a connection to the divine in a way that made me marvel at the wonder of life, um, the importance that each little person, thing, energy, all creation has in the grand scheme of making this earth uh such a beautiful place. And it just was a profound moment to me, you know, and it's if you haven't experienced it, it kind of sounds, it may sound a little woo-woo or hippie or whatever words that you want to say about it. But I just want to say, like, it's like try that. Another place where I have felt that experience is um, well, I think I love um what's a oh Honel, Alex Honnell, when he was doing free solo, right? And he just talked about how, or it was him or somebody else was talking about how while he's climbing that, his brain can't be anywhere else. It's just entirely there. And so that's this huge passion of his because he gets to experience pure present presence, and maybe we can think of other times that we can do that. I think um fly fishing is one for me. I have caught fish fly fishing um with a guide on Salmon River, but just I love to go stand in the Provo River and cast out a fly, and it's like, why? It's like, well, because you've got to cast it for one, and then you are just laser focused on this tiny, tiny fly. So you can't think of anything else, or you might miss the fish, right? So it's going down and you're just watching it and watching it, and then when it pulls down, you pull it out and send it back upriver, or you've got to watch it to catch the fish, but there's not a lot of opportunity for your mind to wander and think about other things. So there are things, activities that we can do where we may experience that. If the if you have a sport that you love to do, if you have something, just think about maybe the passion that you feel toward it, maybe the way that it lights you up is actually just you experiencing pure presence. And then realize that now it's just you know what it feels like. Now try to apply it in other areas of your life. This is the point where we start to be able to change and experience more peace because we can be true to who we want to be. The hardest place, we're practicing all of it because the hardest place for us to be totally mindful is in moments where we have heightened stress, right? Um, when there's pressure on us in uh from other people. It's when our negative beliefs about ourselves are engaging in that moment. It's very hard. So on Wednesday, I'm gonna give you an a really good and really helpful practical skill that you can apply and start thinking about for it. But for right now, let's just practice this week just being present and mindful in the things that we're doing. If you're walking, just walk. Um, the uh a John Nate and a John Vilasek, uh, my teachers have also taught us like we will do walking meditations together. So you can try that this week. And really, that is just a process of uh like you're lifting your foot, moving your foot, stepping your foot, lifting, moving, stepping, and you're going slow because your brain knows how to go a normal pace. And so once it's going a normal pace, it can then direct energy to thinking about other things. But if you break up the process that you normally do it, you know, when people say if you're driving to work all the time and you kind of disconnect, drive a new way and then you're more present. It's like that. You want to give the brain something else that it now it has to focus because this is new. And so when you are walking like that, it's just you're just focusing on the feet, and that is all. And you can do it. I mean, they can do it for hours at a time, but even just 10 minutes, you'll notice after a little bit at first, you kind of feel like you're gonna tip over, you kind of, you know, but then as you really engage presence and do it mindfully, it there's this surge of just contentment, I think is the right word that I have experienced in it. So try it out, see what you think. Um, and also maybe like if you're doing laundry this week, if you were um man, watching a kid play sports, if you're doing whatever, just try one thing where you just do that one thing. And notice how it might be difficult. Notice that you can use the same skills that we've been doing in meditation to just bring yourself back to the present moment. Um, so we're gonna try that. Now let's just do a 10-minute meditation where we're just going to focus on our breath. We're gonna practice the skills right now of just coming back to our breath to help you when you are doing mindfulness. It's the exact same thing. The exact same thing in the sense that when you are cutting vegetables or cooking dinner, your brain wants to wander because you've done this a million times. But practice bringing your mind back to exactly what you're doing, and you'll see that the quality of every little normal thing that you're engaging in increases so much. Um, and it's just it's just an interesting thing. I don't want to put a concept to why it is, it's just try it, experience it, and see what you learn from it. So we're just gonna do 10 minutes. Now, I want to tell you as well, if you are sitting down and you're able to sit down and close your eyes and do the meditation, and I will direct you back to your breathing, that is awesome. I mean, I think that that is one of the most helpful practices, and it's something that I find like I um I think I was reading something from the Dao Ching, but it was it was like all the rain, all the rivers, all the creeks, all the lakes, do not worry because they know they are constantly in the process of returning to the ocean. So it's like the ocean is like our state of peace. So our mind is gonna wander out and then we're gonna bring it back in. So if you can sit down, great. If not, try this time. Just while if you're like one time I was doing a lot of things, cooking or hanging up clothes or whatever, just be present in what you're doing. Follow the meditation, concentrate on your breathing while you're doing what you're doing. Just being present and aware, being aware that you are breathing and cutting or whatever you're doing, cutting the vegetables, hanging up laundry, whatever it is you're doing. Just practice that. Do this one alone, not with other people. Um, I mean, other people can be around, that's fine, but not in engagement with another person. But just to begin to practice strengthening this muscle of mindfulness, that is going to be super helpful in what I'm teaching you on Wednesday. So let's go ahead and get in a comfortable position. You can sit in a chair, you can sit on the floor, I'm on my meditation pad, you can um whatever it is that makes you comfortable, you can sit in lotus position and then put your hands in your lap, out on your knees. Um, you can face them up, which is a sort of openness, or down, which is like groundedness, whatever you feel like you need, wherever you feel comfortable. Let's just take a deep breath. And this time I'm just gonna remind you to come back to your breath. Remember to use your tools of the wild animal visualization if that helps. Let's close our eyes and take a deep breath in. And now we're gonna do that. You can visualize the wild animal that has gone away. You want to remind it to stay with you, so gently bring it back. No judgment. Just gentle guidance. We're trying to get it to choose to stay with us over time. And then deep breath in. If you are sitting, just relax. Keep coming back to your breath. If you notice any tension, direct your attention to it. Tension, tension, tension, and then come back to the breath. If you are mindfully doing chores or other activities, just exact same practice. Come back to the breath once your mind wanders off. Once you become aware that your mind has wandered off, you're back in the present moment again. So all is okay. No sense in judgment. Just take a deep breath and go back to being mindful. Short in breath. Short out breath. Long in breath. Long out breath. As we finish up, you can keep your eyes closed if you would like. Just as a reminder, that peace begins within each one of us. That if we want peace in this world or peace in our families or peace in our communities, we first have to start within ourselves. The best way for us to show love to other people, the truest love language, is to be able to handle ourselves. Commit today to be more loving, more honest, more open. This will be the most difficult and most important work that you will ever do as you work toward being more connected with your higher self. I hope that you are all happy.