Dawson's Story—Finding Meaning Through Grief | Meditation #6

*Dive deeper with the full Conversation Episode next!*

What if the experiences that break our hearts can also become sacred ground for healing?

In this guided meditation, Amy honors the life of her son Dawson, who passed away at four and a half years old, and explores what grief can teach us about resilience, compassion, and becoming more whole.

The difficult experiences we endure can leave us feeling overwhelmed, lost, or even broken. Through mindful breathing and gentle self-compassion, this meditation invites you to slow down, regulate your nervous system, and offer yourself the same love and encouragement you would give to someone else who is hurting.

This isn’t simply a relaxation exercise. It’s an opportunity to honor what you have survived, recognize the strength within your struggle, and begin seeing life’s most painful experiences not only as wounds, but as sacred parts of your healing and growth.

Then, join us on Wednesday as Amy and Ryan share more about Dawson, the profound impact his life and death had on their family, and what their experience has taught them about grief, resilience, compassion, and finding meaning in life’s most difficult moments.

If this meditation resonates with you, come back to it whenever life feels especially heavy. Sometimes healing begins with something as simple as taking one breath at a time, wrapping your arms around yourself, and remembering: You’ve got this.

*Subscribe to the Greater Peace Podcast for new episodes every Monday and Wednesday.*

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Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:04

Hi guys, I'm Amy Lindstrom, and this is the Greater Peace Podcast. Today's Monday, so we are going to do a new topic of the week. I'm going to introduce the topic very quickly and then we're going to do a guided meditation. And then on Wednesday, Ryan and I will deep dive on the topic. This week's going to be a little bit different, not just in the meditation and the topic, but because I try to follow my gut on what to talk about each time. And usually it hits with like excitement. I look forward to it. And it just feels like clarity, you know, like when we were talking about intuition. Today I have felt off all day. And I've just felt like, what is this getting ready to record? Because we'll record both today. And then it hit me about an hour ago. I couldn't come up with, I couldn't land on a topic that I felt good about. And I just kept thinking, I'll know, I'll know. And then about an hour ago it hit. And I'm a little nervous about it. Uh because I don't, it's not the typical thing that I would do, but I also feel like it's right. Um, so Ryan and I have mentioned a couple of times that we um lost our son, or our son Dawson passed away when he was four and a half. And I think today is his, I don't think I know his birthday is today. Um, him and Mallory are twins. They were born 21 years ago. They were born at about 26 and a half weeks about. Um, Dawson was two pounds 10 ounces, Mallory was two pounds three ounces, and they struggled in the beginning quite a bit. Um and then uh Dawson had over 40 surgeries, 27 on his brain, and um at four and a half, his little body was just tired and and he died. Um I just kind of felt like today would be a great day to honor him. We're celebrating Mallory. I do like birthday week with my family where for the week up to their birthday, um, just like every day, like a favorite treat, or take them out to eat at their favorite place or something like that, just to kind of celebrate them with the little things. And I'm like gifts, I'm not like a mega gift person, um, but I really, really love finding something that somebody loves or that kind of is like an I see you thing, or this is something that makes you feel special or whatever. I love that. So we've been doing that with Mallory, and then I decorated everything for her today and then did her candy bar poster because it's mandatory. Uh, and then it just hit that um that we also are gonna maybe um celebrate uh Dawson a bit. And this is how, because oh because I think that so much of what I learned from being Dawson's mom and through the experience of Dawson and what I learned about myself in that experience is exactly why I am where I am. Um I think I have the perspective that I have because of um the experience of him and then his death and other things as well, but I just uh I just I think that it would be great, um, hard, but great to talk about it. Ryan does not know this yet, I'm about to tell him because we will be recording both episodes today. So um anyway, we'll just see how it goes. I think the focus largely is on kind of um resilience, grief, and just honoring the difficult things that we have been through and that we do go through or are going through, and just giving ourselves a little bit of self-care and love. One of the things, um, a quote that I love is um I think it's uh let me see, I think it's um Schnarch that said it, but um, he said, our mistakes and our regrets are not barriers to becoming who we can be, they are the necessary ingredient. And I think that there's something about that quote that just really hits with me, that it's not just our regrets and our mistakes, it's everything. Why are all of us going through so many different just struggles? There's so many different ways to live this life. And as a therapist, helping with addiction and trauma, the stuff people go through, and helping with grief for people who lose spouses or parents or um siblings or anything. And I think that the thing that always comes back to me is um it's just like, why is it so different for everybody? And I guess the thing that I've landed on that kind of gives me a sense of of peace in it is that it must be the experience that we need in order to grow. If there's some greater purpose to all of our experience here in this life and these experiences, if there is like really truly like the healing of a soul or the evolution of a soul that is happening through these experiences, then the things that we go through are not unfair. They're sacred. And I think that if we learned how to see each other in that way and see instead of like what's wrong with you when people are acting in a way, but more seeing it as like, what happened to you? Like, what do you need? How can I help you? Um, then it would lead us all to have greater compassion for each other, for ourselves. We can be more help for people. Oftentimes, sitting with people in hard moments is very hard because, as we've talked about before, it kind of forces us to tap into our own suffering. So if we're going to sit with somebody who's really sad in grief, what our brain is going to do is gonna bring up our own memories of grief and what was hard for us. Um, and or it may challenge us to imagine how we would feel in a certain situation, and that's terrifying. And so I think that if we could grow in our capacity for compassion and sitting with people and hurt, we will better know how to help people who are struggling, and we will better know how to comfort and help ourselves and not get stuck in it. So I want to do the meditation with you now. And this one is just going to be 10 minutes. We're just gonna use our same skills that we have used before right toward the end. I'm gonna um just kind of lead a little bit in it. And I hope that it is helpful for you. I really hope that this week is it's um a little indulgent um in us talking about something that's so specific to us, but I know grief is something that we all experience. None of us are getting out of here without this experience. So I hope that in some way um us sharing our experience and what we have learned through it and just our own process and discussing resilience will be helpful. So let's go ahead and get comfortable. You can, again, if you're doing tasks around the house, just be mindful as you listen. Focus on what you're doing, focus on your breathing. Uh try to be mindful of your thoughts wandering and just bring them back. Remember, last um two times ago, I think it was, I taught you the counting skill. You can do that as well. Um, the one through five, and then start over one through six, and then start over one through seven, all the way up to ten, where you're just focusing on the in-breath is one, the out breath is one. It's really just kind of helping you focus on just being present. Your mind will wander. Remember, the mind is a wild animal. It's been wandering its whole life, and we want it to be with us, but we don't want to chastise or punish it or tie it down. We just want to invite it back over and over and over. This practice helps us um to begin to um like learn that we don't have to respond to every thought that comes into our mind, that we have the ability to slow down and contemplate or become aware of what we're thinking and then choose the way that we want to respond to a situation. Um, but it also when anxious thoughts are running amok, as they do, um especially because if you've ever had a panic attack, panic attacks are often an anxious thought takes hold, and then it's like your brain saying, Now that I have your attention, let me tell you all the things we should be afraid of, and then it spirals down and takes over your whole body. But there is a way to stop the spiral, to recognize when the panic starts and to be able to breathe deep and to regulate yourself as much as you possibly can. So that's what we're building in this skill. But let's let's do this meditation for a bit. And um I hope that it is helpful for you and just gives you just a moment of peace and calm, regulates your nervous system a little bit, uh, adjusts your heart rate, all those kind of things. So if you want to sit down, then just sit and be comfortable. If you're up doing things, then just be mindful of what you're doing. So let's start with a big deep inhale. And then let all that air go. As you inhale this time, inhale deep. Imagine those lungs getting so full, it pushes the diaphragm down into your belly. Maybe you feel your stomach go out, hold it for two seconds, and then exhale, pushing it all out, feeling that diaphragm go back up and wringing out those lungs. Again, another inhale. This time you may choose to exhale. You can do it with more force, more sound, whatever you want. Inhale again. Just remembering to focus on the breathing. Your mind has wandered. Bring yourself back to the breath.

SPEAKER_01 13:58

Inhale. Exhale.

SPEAKER_00 14:05

Short breath in, short breath out, long breath in, long breath out. You may choose to focus directly on your nose. The air passing through your nostrils if that helps. Just trying to give your mind the ability to focus just on the breath. Maybe it's saying, I'm not good at this, I can't do this. Maybe it's telling you that you've got to hurry because you've got other things you need to get done. Just notice it. And then take a deep breath. It's okay to let those voices float to the back. Just remember, this is just the practice of bringing awareness back to the breath, back to the present moment, over and over and over. You're doing great. If it's not relaxing for you because it feels like you're having a battle inside your mind, just give yourself some compassion and accept that it is a battle right now, but in time, you hope that it is less of a battle. For these last couple of minutes, I want you to focus on sending compassion and love to yourself. Maybe you'll choose one of my favorite things, just wrap your arms around yourself. Just hold tight.

SPEAKER_01 18:58

Maybe remind yourself you're doing all that you can. Maybe remind yourself that this is a season and that things will get better. Remember to encourage yourself. You've got this. You can do it.

SPEAKER_00 19:28

The experiences that we have in this life and the people that we come across are all here in our lives to show us here where we are not yet free. That what feels like it is going wrong is actually the the key to the doorway to the more healed version of yourself. And as you learn how to use that key, you become more whole. That you have the whole energy of the universe. I I believe that the universe that all creation wants us to be as whole as possible, because then there is more goodness on this earth, there's more compassion, there's more love. And so if that is true, then we have the entire universe behind us using these experiences to help us to move through, to grow, to learn, to become a more whole version of ourselves. If you wake up in the morning, sometimes when I wake up and I'm just feeling particularly heavy or overwhelmed, I just wrap my arms around myself. Say, I got you, girl. We're gonna do one thing at a time today. That's it. And it just makes such a difference. It's just a little bit of love and compassion. We can be for ourselves who we wish that we uh, if somebody else could have been at another time in our lives, but we can begin by fostering that within ourselves and then it will radiate out just naturally. I hope that you are all well and that you are all happy and that you are all peaceful. And I look forward to um sharing our Dawson with you on Wednesday.