What qualifies me to speak on this?
I'm single in my 50's,
I have tried multiple dating sites,
I have had terrible experiences,
I have had wonderful experiences and made friends,
Ive done the work on my self and healed from my past,
I know I am enough, I love myself, I trust myself, I am worthy of the best relationships that 2 people can create.
Dating in 2020 is challenging, how do I know this? Well I'm single and on the dating roller coaster, yes it really can feel like a roller coaster for both men and women. Not only have we had lock downs this year, which meant you haven't been able to go on the typical coffee date, movie or dinner date. You have had to get creative and have Zoom dates and Face time, get to know each other without physically meeting for some in different states.
So how do you stay resilient whilst dating, here are some really key ideas to staying true to yourself and keeping your sanity and dignity.
Be yourself - If you start out being yourself you re more comfortably and open and can share yourself and find out more about them. If your photos are current and real you are saying here you are, this is me.
Be authentic in the way you speak and describe yourself, what you like, what you don't like and what you want in your future. If you are adventurous then share what that means to you but if you are not adventurous and you are trying to impress this will come out later.
Don't be afraid to ask for what you want, if you are sure what you want then maybe its time to take he time and write down what you are looking for and what you need.
Learn these 4 beautiful practices;
Self Love - I am enough, I am who I am and I accept myself and love myself
Self Worth - I am worthy, worthy o love, worthy of respect ad worthy of a loving relationship
Self Trust - I trust my decisions, I listen to my intuition, I do what is right for the greater good
Self belief - I can do this and I can put myself out there in an authentic way and trust the process
DO NOT Tolerate bad behavior and DO NOT behave badly - having boundaries is really important and also understanding what your expectations are for a relationship, friendship or hookup (if that is what you are seeking).
Know what your big values are and be real about them, if your main values don't align then their will be conflict, for example if Family is a high value to me but not to the other person that can be an issue (not always) so it needs to be discussed. In my opinion Smoking is bad as it doesn't support health and well-being so I wont even go on a date with a smoker.
Be OK with being alone for now, as it's not being alone forever.