Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
Two sex addicts in long-term successful recovery are ALSO world-class Counselors who specialize in porn and sex addiction recovery. Drawing on 40 years of combined personal and professional experience, Mark and Steve get RAW and REAL about HOW to overcome addiction, heal betrayal trauma and save your marriage. If you're struggling with addiction—we get it. Recovery is hard. We've been there. We'll help you take the fight to your addiction like never before. If you're married to an addict—we KNOW what it's like to nearly destroy a marriage! We'll help you understand the world of your husband's addiction and begin healing your betrayal trauma, regardless of what he decides to do. You don't have to stay stuck. You don't have to keep suffering. We've made all the mistakes so you don't have to. Take back your life. Take back your marriage. Let's do this together! This is the PBSE podcast.
Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
How Long Should My Former Addict Partner Maintain Sobriety and Recovery Before I Consider Getting Back with Him?
PBSE Podcast Episode 282 tackles the emotionally complex question many betrayed partners face: “How long should my former addict partner maintain sobriety and recovery before I consider getting back with him?” Rather than offering a simple timeline, it reframes the question to focus on the quality and consistency of change in both partners. The article underscores that while time matters, what matters more is whether the former addict has shown verifiable growth—emotionally, behaviorally, and relationally. It also explores the partner’s own healing journey, highlighting that reconciliation can only be healthy if both individuals are actively working toward personal recovery.
Key concepts such as healthy interdependence, compatibility of emotional wants and needs, and the importance of dismantling codependency are explored in depth. The article argues that rebuilding a relationship requires a fresh foundation, not a return to old dynamics. It emphasizes the need to assess past relationship patterns honestly and cautions against letting nostalgia or loneliness drive decisions. Trial periods, structured re-engagement, and gradual “re-dating” are presented as useful tools for observing change before committing to full reunification.
Ultimately, the article advises that while a minimum of six months to a year of sustained recovery might serve as a general benchmark, it’s not the time alone that matters—it’s what’s been done with that time. Reconciliation should be based on real, observable transformation, not promises or hopeful thinking. When both partners take ownership of their healing and work toward becoming emotionally whole individuals, the possibility for reconnection becomes both healthier and more sustainable.
For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: How Long Should My Former Addict Partner Maintain Sobriety and Recovery Before I Consider Getting Back with Him?
Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com
Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services