Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
Two sex addicts in long-term successful recovery are ALSO world-class Counselors who specialize in porn and sex addiction recovery. Drawing on 40 years of combined personal and professional experience, Mark and Steve get RAW and REAL about HOW to overcome addiction, heal betrayal trauma and save your marriage. If you're struggling with addiction—we get it. Recovery is hard. We've been there. We'll help you take the fight to your addiction like never before. If you're married to an addict—we KNOW what it's like to nearly destroy a marriage! We'll help you understand the world of your husband's addiction and begin healing your betrayal trauma, regardless of what he decides to do. You don't have to stay stuck. You don't have to keep suffering. We've made all the mistakes so you don't have to. Take back your life. Take back your marriage. Let's do this together! This is the PBSE podcast.
Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
My Partner uses Porn to Punish Me for Not Losing Weight. How do I Recover from That?!
This episode (#295) examines the devastating impact of a husband who weaponized pornography and withheld intimacy as punishment for his wife not meeting his “ideal” body standard. Over two decades, his rejection inflicted a “self-esteem massacre,” leaving her questioning how she could ever recover. We identify this behavior as rooted in immaturity, selfishness, and abuse, making clear that true love cannot coexist with manipulation, blame, and objectification.
On the husband’s side, recovery requires full accountability for the betrayal, exploration of the underlying reasons for his actions, and professional support to overcome blind spots. He must rewire his arousal template away from pornography’s objectification, learn to value his wife as a whole person, and proactively pursue her through consistent, tangible actions of empathy and repair. Without ongoing accountability and amends, there is no foundation for rebuilding trust.
For the partner, healing means cultivating self-worth independent of him, setting clear boundaries, and building a support network outside the marriage. She must find her authentic voice to name her needs, articulate the impact of his actions, and decide what is safe and healthy for her future. The article closes with affirmation: she did not cause this, she does not deserve it, she cannot fix him, and she remains inherently valuable and lovable regardless of his choices.
For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: My Partner uses Porn to Punish Me for Not Losing Weight. How do I Recover from That?!
Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com
Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services