Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
Two sex addicts in long-term successful recovery are ALSO world-class Counselors who specialize in porn and sex addiction recovery. Drawing on 40 years of combined personal and professional experience, Mark and Steve get RAW and REAL about HOW to overcome addiction, heal betrayal trauma and save your marriage. If you're struggling with addiction—we get it. Recovery is hard. We've been there. We'll help you take the fight to your addiction like never before. If you're married to an addict—we KNOW what it's like to nearly destroy a marriage! We'll help you understand the world of your husband's addiction and begin healing your betrayal trauma, regardless of what he decides to do. You don't have to stay stuck. You don't have to keep suffering. We've made all the mistakes so you don't have to. Take back your life. Take back your marriage. Let's do this together! This is the PBSE podcast.
Porn, Betrayal, Sex and the Experts — PBSE
From Shock to Self–Trust: Reclaiming Your Inner Truth After Betrayal
In this episode (#317), we address one of the most destabilizing experiences betrayed partners face: the collapse of reality after discovering a partner’s hidden addiction. When betrayal comes from someone who appeared kind, loving, and emotionally present, the trauma can feel especially disorienting. Partners often question their intelligence, intuition, and judgment—but we make it clear that intuition cannot detect information that was deliberately concealed. Betrayal is not a failure of perception; it is the result of sustained secrecy, compartmentalization, and integrity abuse.
Rather than focusing on whether the addict is truly in recovery or what the future might hold, we invite partners to gently shift their attention back to themselves. Grounding becomes essential in the aftermath of betrayal, as the nervous system is often locked in hypervigilance and survival mode. We explore the importance of pausing—not freezing—so that decisions are not driven by fear, pressure, or urgency. Authentic wants and needs are not ultimatums or selfish demands; they are expressions of self-truth that deserve to be honored, especially after trauma.
Finally, we discuss what it means to reclaim self-trust. Loving another person authentically requires seeing them as they truly are, not just through hope or potential—but it also requires honoring one’s own authentic limits, capacity, and bandwidth. This episode is not about making the “right” relationship decision. It is about choosing a path that allows the betrayed partner to remain congruent, grounded, and whole. Healing does not require predicting the future; it begins by staying honest with yourself in the present.
For a full transcript of this podcast in article format, go to: From Shock to Self-Trust: Reclaiming Your Inner Truth After Betrayal
Learn more about Mark and Steve's revolutionary online porn/sexual addiction recovery and betrayal trauma healing program at—daretoconnectnow.com
Find out more about Steve Moore at: Ascension Counseling
Learn more about Mark Kastleman at: Reclaim Counseling Services