Overwhelm Is Optional Returns: Why I Paused 226 Episodes - and What I Learned About Overwhelm, Burnout and Starting Over

The Overwhelm is Optional podcast is back - but why...and what happened?!

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Transcript

Why The Show Stopped

Teaching Live And Letting Ideas Settle

Doing Less But Better

Choosing In‑Person Networking

Redefining The Ideal Room

Finding The Right Community

Confidence Wobbles And Going Anyway

The Clarity Moment: Titles Matter

It’s All The Same Work

Joy Over Perfection In Podcasting

Speaking To Find Clarity

Proof Listeners Still Want This

SPEAKER_00 0:13

Welcome to Overwhelm is Optional, the podcast for big-hearted, highly driven professionals who are ready to turn overwhelm into clarity, ease, and joy. I'm Heidi Mark, the Gentle Rebel Coach, and in each episode I share insights, stories, and practical tools to help you gently rebel against the pressure to push on through. Because you matter. How you are in the world matters. Hello, hello, hello, and a huge welcome to the return of the Overwhelm is Optional podcast. So what happened? I hear you ask. I thought the last episode was well the last episode. What about the new podcast? Well, firstly, I wasn't going to talk about what happened. I was going to resist the need to justify or explain, but actually, when I thought about what happened, I can see many gifts in the sharing of it. So here's what happened. I didn't record many episodes of the Deep Heartfelt Success podcast last year, not because I'm not exploring it as a concept, I definitely am, but because it I didn't feel the need to explore it in podcast form. I think actually I needed a break from podcasting. I was doing other things. For example, I ran several live courses, something I hadn't done for a few years, and I really enjoyed it. And it's very, very different when you're teaching in a small group because you get to explore a concept in a different way. You get immediate feedback, or not necessarily in the moment, but you get feedback over the time you're running the course, and that's really really helpful. And that it's just different. It's different than I mean, I do get feedback on these episodes, and I'm really grateful for those. And please, please keep sending me feedback, so so valuable. But it's just different, right? It's different getting a group of people together and exploring personally for them a concept, so you go much deeper and you change and join things together, you make connections as you do it. So it's it's like an intense way of doing it, which is really cool, but it's just different, and because I was doing that, and I intended to actually at the time recall podcast episodes about that experience, but I didn't, which is interesting, just interesting, it's not good, it's not bad, it's just interesting. So I'm neutrally noticing that it was always on my list. Create content about that because obviously running those courses generates a lot of thought and ideas, and I really want to communicate those ideas because I believe they're really valuable, but at the time I think it was just too much, and also I think it needs to settle. So that was one reason that I wasn't podcasting much last year. It's just different, a different, different season, I think. And then at the beginning of this year, when I did my business review and I pareto principled it, so uh what was it? So 80% of your results come from 20% of your efforts. So I looked at what was going on in my business and I decided, as always, but particularly this year, to do less but better. I realised the two things that generate the most business growth for me is networking and podcasting. So then I decided that I wanted to network again in-person networking because I don't know, just got excited about that idea. I haven't done a lot of in-person networking for a couple of years because I live in the middle of nowhere and it's an effort and it takes a lot of time and energy out for business to travel somewhere, and I just didn't feel the need to do it. I can online networking can also be brilliant, right? There's there's lots of ways of meeting people and generating more business, growing your business, communicating your ideas. But this year I decided I really wanted to do more in-person networking, but I wanted a very particular type of networking, so I didn't want the kind of networking where you all get one minute or five minutes to speak, because I've done that and I don't always find it particularly helpful because people are just waiting nervously or impatiently or whatever for their turn, and it I don't know, it just I don't find that beneficial. I always find the best bit is when you arrive before the meeting starts and you're getting coffee, you start having really good conversations with people and getting to know them, and that's the really interesting, exciting bit for me. And then when you have to sit down and and do the elevator pictures, I just I don't know. I mean it's it's slightly interesting and it's fine, there's nothing wrong with it, but I wanted more than that. I decided that if I was going to do this, I wanted to be more specific about what I wanted, so I created a list of what I wanted. So I wanted to I wanted it to be really generous, so the idea is not so transactional, where you're saying I do this, you do that, swap business cards, and kind of ignore everybody else. I I like people and I wanted more chance, basically I wanted more chance to talk as well. So I wanted it set up where most of the time spent was spent in conversation with people because I just like people, I'm fascinated by people. So less kind of self-promotion and more listening and exchanging of ideas, even if they're not relevant ideas to the business because people buy from people, and what I love about business is it's an opportunity to share what you're good at, whether that person needs it or they know somebody else, and I really really like referring other people, so I just wanted that generosity and and and genuine chance for connection. I wanted time to connect, and I also wanted to be with people who are successful, so they're already at a level a certain level of success because that's who my clients are, and also I get excited. I love being with people who are highly driven, even if they don't feel successful. This is always the difficult thing. It's the thing about saying I work with successful people is all of them will tell you, yeah, but I'm not that successful because I haven't worked this out yet. But you know what I mean, you've worked hard, you've reached a certain level of success. Anyway, I had this idea in my head, and then I was searching online, and I don't live in a city, so I knew I was going to have to travel, and there are two cities that I'm between, so I looked at both those cities, and then I came across this one, and I read the copy on the website, and I knew wow, that's exactly what I was looking for. So I would call that manifesting because I had an idea in my head, and then I'm searching and I find it. So I'm not saying that I created that into being, I'm saying that the finding of it, the making it real, is priming my brain, getting the reticular activating system on board, and then searching from that place rather than searching generally. Anyway, I thought right I'd give it a go. Now it's much higher ticket cost than any other business networks, but I kind of thought that was a good thing because they were offering a lot and there was a speaker as well. So anyway, I thought I'd give it a go. I also bought a ticket for another one. Sorry about that noise. That is the dogs. I'll just pause a second, let them finish scratching. Right, I think that kerfuffles over. Apologies for that. You might not even have heard it. You know when dogs just suddenly start fidgeting. Anyway, where was I? So, anyway, I went along and I absolutely loved it. The the I liked the venue, I liked the people, I had such a warm welcome, I had really good conversations, there was no pressure because there was plenty of time to have the conversation, and that's what I wanted. And I I was really inspired by the founders, the two people who set it up. I really liked them, I liked what they were trying to do. So, anyway, it was great. Really so I found what I was looking for very, very quickly. So that was one of the things from the beginning of the year that happened very quickly. So that was I probably decided two weeks before I attended, and there were actually looking back, there were lots of things, there were lots of reasons in the two weeks leading up to going to that where I thought, oh no, I'm not ready because I didn't have business cards, um, I need to just polish my boots, that kind of thing, you know. Am I ready for this? Kind of you know, not procrastinating, but I if you're gonna go, go with the right energy, right? Go with the right intention. Anyway, I got rid of all of those self-doubt things and set myself up ready to do it. So the whole thing happened really, really quickly. What a great start to the year! Already ticked that one off. But here's here's how this is relevant to the relaunch of this podcast. So I was explaining what I do, and every time I said deep heartfelt success, I had to say it twice, and it wasn't because yeah, I mean, I'm I don't think I was mumbling, I think I'm pretty good at speaking clearly. It I think it's because there's too many words, deep heartfelt success, and I understand the need to ask questions about what it means, but it was the saying of it, it felt clunky, it didn't feel it didn't feel that easy, it didn't roll off the tongue, and then I suddenly realized overwhelm is optional, it's brilliant because it rolls off the tongue, and well it it it alliterates, who doesn't? I love a bit of alliteration. I don't know, just what it's intriguing, right? It's an intriguing concept. So I came back from that realizing I had this real clarity of oh maybe I overcomplicated things. Now that doesn't mean that it was a misadventure. So my reasons for stopping this podcast were clear. I was done, I didn't want to talk about overwhelm anymore. But looking back, I think I probably needed a break from podcasting because I didn't actually record many episodes of the Deep Heartfelt Success podcast. Now I can see that with hindsight, couldn't see it at the time, and at the time it felt really exciting because it's the next thing, and you've got you've got to be growing and developing all the time, right? It's definitely where I'm headed and where my clients are heading into deep heartfelt success, but it's not a separate concept, it's all the same stuff. Why make overwhelm optional? Why gently rebel against the nonsense that have to have the life you want, you have to quit the overwhelm exhaustion cycle? Why? Because you want deep heartfelt success, which is all the stuff that you originally were working so hard for the peace of mind, the ease, the satisfaction, the sense of accomplishment, etc. But it's all the same stuff, it doesn't need its own podcast, it could have its own podcast. This thing, it's not a mistake, but for a while I was stuck with maybe I made a mistake, oh, all that rebranding, all that self-doubt. So there was a lot of stuff in my way of second-guessing myself, doubting myself that I had to overcome, and also until I'm ready to talk about stuff, there's no point making a fuss. To me, podcasting isn't a duty, it's a joy. I have things to share, I'm bursting to share them, and therefore I'm gonna dare to just record my thoughts without over-editing and polishing. This is really important to me. I find it really stressful if I get into the it needs to be more polished, it should be more professional. It's not helpful, it's not it doesn't work for me. Now I'm a I'm a very well-trained teacher, I can do the succinct workshop with slides, I can do a good talk, you know. I can I can do all of that. That's not what podcasting's for. If it's for me, it's not anyway. What I really like when I listen to a podcast is res the resonation of of like my heart to theirs, where I'm like, oh yeah, I really like this person. There's something about the energy of someone when they're just being themselves, but being but not being themselves, like this I find it very difficult. I'm being myself. What is authenticity? I mean with a purpose, with a professional purpose. So a high integrity, I want to get this point across, but I am going to allow myself to think out loud as opposed to a polished scripted thing, which although can also be brilliant, and sometimes I do want to listen to that because it's kind of faster in some ways, but there's something nice about listening to somebody speaking their way to clarity, which is what I tend to do. And for me personally, I get energy out of that, and I think I'd lost that because I I think I was oh I know, not I think, I know I was overcomplicating, overthinking, thinking it ought to be better. Now I did say a few moments ago that this year I'm doing less but better, and that tripped me up when I went to record this week. Oh, it needs to be better, you need to polish it, you need to relaunch it, it needs to be more purposeful. But the thing is, if I keep letting stuff get in my way, I just don't do stuff, and that's no good either. And the amount of people who have told me that they listen to the Overwhelm is optional podcast and they love it, so who am I to stop speaking my way to clarity if it's of benefit for you? That's absolutely ridiculous. That's just a nonsense. I did five years of this podcast really happily, and it worked. And the reason I stopped was I I felt like I didn't have anything else to say. Not it didn't work, and what I've also noticed is everybody's still listening to it. I don't know who's still listening to it. I know some people are listen going back and re-listening because I'm not producing anything new, but the downloads haven't dropped, even though I stopped the podcast, which suggests something very important, doesn't it? People maybe want to listen to what I have to say. So what's the easiest, most joyful may, the most gently rebellious way to do that? It is to get out of my head, to acknowledge and neutrally notice the self-doubt, the concerns that it needs to be better in a million different ways, but to do it anyway, from my heart with courage, because it's a gift to be able to podcast, because it's a gift to have work that nourishes me and nourishes you. That's a gift. So I want to share my ideas more. So, welcome to the Overwhelm is Optional Podcast season two, The Gentle Rebellion into Deep Heartfelt Success. Thank you so much for listening and for being part of the Overwhelm is Optional Podcast. If you want to continue the conversation, please do connect with me on LinkedIn, Instagram or YouTube. Let me know your thoughts. I love hearing from you. And if you found this helpful, taking a moment to share, subscribe, and leave a review would be much appreciated. It helps other people find the podcast. If you're ready to turn overwhelm into joy, you'll find my books, resources, and ways to work with me on my website heidmark.co.uk and on Amazon. All the links are in the show notes. Until next time, keep gently rebelling and making overwhelm optional for you.