"She's a walker"

One day you are judging one person and the next you are doing the exact same thing you were judging them for. 

Jackie from Intermittent Fasting Foodie has inspired me to try OMAD or eating one meal a day and i am loving it so far!

Gin Stephens is the other awesome lady who inspired both of us, check out her book Delay, Don't Deny and her other book Jackie from Intermittent Fasting Foodie has inspired me to try OMAD or eating one meal a day and i am loving it so far!

Gin Stephens is the other awesome lady who inspired both of us, check out her book Delay, Don't Deny and her other book

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:06

Hey guys, Natalia Schneimler here. I help boy moms have a better relationship with their sons and themselves by teaching them the tools how to manage their mind so that when anything comes up in life, they know exactly how to take care of themselves and their kids. Hey guys, how's it going? So you know how I talk on the show about thoughts and how our thoughts matter and changing them. changes your life, right? So I have been thinking about how our thoughts actually can change without our awareness, right? Through life, we just pick up thoughts and just move on. We're not really conscious of it. We just change them, but we think that the life has changed. So I have a The thought has changed throughout experience, through life, through time. But if I wasn't aware of it, I would just think, oh, I have changed. Or I would not attribute it to the thought. But I just want to share this with you so that we can be aware that it's not just, you know, we change our thoughts on purpose or we don't try to change them. It's that also life teaches us that through exposure, different thoughts. And so they happen even without us noticing them, and they just sometimes stick. So I have these two examples from my own life, and I want you to think about that for yourself. So one example, I remember years ago, before I had my own kids, I was hanging out with someone, distant relative, who had just had a baby or something like that. And Then I heard my other family members talk about that mom, that lady, and they said, oh, she's a walker. And I go, what do you mean she's a walker? Like, what's a walker? I was so young and so naive. And I was like, what are you talking about? What's a walker? And they're like, she likes to walk. And I'm like, oh, okay. And in my head, I was judging her so harshly. I'm like, what the hell is a walker? That's so lame. That's just so pathetic that a person's not exercising and they're walking and they're calling it a walker. That's too pathetic. You shouldn't even call it anything. I remember having that reaction. Sure enough, years ago, years later, 15 years later, however long, I'm walking. I love walking. So I guess I'm a walker now. So the thought has changed to I love walking, right? Before, I would not want to be a walker. So I wasn't going on walks. I was exercising. I'm like, oh, I'm going to go for a run. I used to run back then a lot. I'm like, walking is so lame. And I was a runner. I did triathlons. I did 10Ks. I did a couple of half marathons. So walking was super lame to me, right? So again, it's not that life has changed or I have changed. It's that my thought, I adopted a new thought. I had one thought back then. And then because the life has changed, now my thought, because my demand of my time has grew and my energy, I had lots of kids, now... the new thought got activated in me that I love walking. So now I'm a walker, right? So I find how that's fascinating because how can that happen without us consciously choosing and also just seeing how it's playing around in our life. It just gets activated and deactivated whenever it wants to. Without us really choosing it. So maybe sometimes we can choose it on purpose. Sometimes it just happens over the years. The other example I have is with volunteering at the school for my kids. A year or two ago, I had this thought. I'm not volunteering. It's exhausting. I don't want to. I already have four kids at home. And when I go to volunteer at the school for kids events, I said, you know, they give me four kids to watch over. So I said, I don't need that. I already have four kids at home. So I need a break during that time. So that was my thought pattern back then. But as soon as I heard my other, so I was not volunteering as much. I was just doing kind of bare minimum and not really raising my hand for more opportunities. And that, looking back, it didn't feel as great. It felt more defensive. It felt more judgmental. I was like, how dare they want me to volunteer already? I'm so busy at home. And it was not a good feeling, like looking back now. And as soon as I heard my other friend talk about volunteering as this is something special that I'm doing for my kids, click, that's it. It kind of stuck in my brain. And now all I think about every time they ask for volunteers, I raise my hand right away because I know, because my thought now is this will be special for my kids. Now, nothing has changed out in the world except for that one thought. But because of the thought change, my behavior is very different. Like in both cases, the behavior is exactly the opposite of the other behavior, right? Not walking, walking, and volunteering and not volunteering. And in both cases, if you notice, the first one was not walking. was not a good feeling, like judgmental, kind of disgusted almost, right, like appalled. And the second one also, like, you know, not a great feeling, like defensive. And then when I adopted that new thought and started doing the action, the feeling is great. The feeling is of giving. The feeling is just good. You feel really good about them us, the whole world, yourself, and you're like, you're doing a great thing for everyone involved. Same with walking, right? I'm like, I'm so happy I'm doing this for myself. That way I can be great for others, and it's good for my mental health, good for my body. Same thing with volunteering. I feel good about myself, feel good to help the school, feel good for the kids. So I find that so interesting how if, you know, if The thought change can happen over a few years. Well, maybe sometimes we can make it happen quicker than that if we want to, right? We can play around with it and find something that works. For example, with sugar, right? Eating sugary things and bready things. This is where it's taking me longer than I would like to. I would love to just get to a place where I never wanted to. And just like with alcohol, I just never think about it, never want it again. But with sugar, I'm still playing around with it. I do get frustrated sometimes and I would like to find something that sticks, but I'm not giving up hope. So I go back and forth. I eat it. I don't eat it. I would like to stop. I'm kind of cleansing, but I'm not giving up hope. I'm looking for that one thought that sticks. And finding, okay, this one feels really good. Like right now, I don't know if this will stick or not. But right now, the thought that feels really good, that's fueling me eating clean is I want to feel healthy. Because I guess I was not feeling healthy. And that was really bothering me. I was like, this is not good. I want to feel healthy. And this is driving my... clean eating. It's driving more love towards myself. So these are all the examples I have for you. Enjoy getting to know my life and using it for yours. And pay attention to how you're feeling. If you're not feeling good about something, what are you thinking about it? Just want to invite you to join me on Zoom. All you have to do is go to my website, www.coachingitalia.com and sign up for a free session where I can help you feel better today. All right? I hope I'll see you soon. Have a great week. Bye. Love you.