Not Defined By Motherhood, the Podcast
A grounded, honest, and empowering podcast for moms who are tired of the pressure, tired of the noise, and ready to find clarity. Host Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers helps mothers challenge expectations, reconnect with who they are, and take simple steps that create real change - because you are not defined by motherhood.
Episodes
91 episodes
Unrealistic Expectations of Motherhood (And Why You Feel Like You’re Failing)
Unrealistic expectations of motherhood are quietly shaping how you see yourself - and they might be the reason you feel like you’re never doing enough.If you’re overwhelmed, confused, or starting to question whether it’s even possible to...
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7:59
Intentional Motherhood and Mom Burnout
Intentional motherhood sounds beautiful in theory. Parent on purpose. Be present. Live aligned.But if you’ve been Googling intentional motherhood because you’re exhausted, second-guessing every choice, and hyperaware of doing it “right”…...
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7:25
How to Not Lose Yourself in Motherhood
How to not lose yourself in motherhood is a question many moms Google before their baby even arrives.If you’re pregnant or newly postpartum and already worried about losing yourself in motherhood, this episode is for you. The motherhood ...
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6:42
Losing Yourself in Motherhood? You Haven't.
Losing yourself in motherhood is one of the most common - and quietly painful - experiences moms search for.If you’re feeling burned out, disconnected, and wondering where you went… this episode is for you.We’re unpacking t...
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5:38
Advice for Moms: How to Filter the Overwhelm
Advice for moms can feel nonstop the moment you announce you’re pregnant.If you’re getting ready to have a baby and already feeling anxious about doing everything “right,” this episode is for you. The advice overwhelm starts early - feed...
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6:24
Not Everyone Is a Holiday Magic Maker (And That’s Okay)
The holidays aren’t exhausting because you’re doing them wrong - they’re exhausting because of the expectations stacked on you.In this episode, I’m joined by my friend Jamie for an honest, funny, and deeply validating conversation about ...
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47:55
The Truth About New Year’s Resolutions for Moms: Why You’re Not the Problem
Every January, moms are told to reinvent themselves with “New Year, new you!”—but what if you’re not the problem? In this episode of Not Defined by Motherhood, Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers exposes the truth about New Year’s resolut...
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6:37
How to Say No Without Explaining Yourself: A Mom’s Guide to Boundaries and Sanity
If the word “no” instantly makes you feel guilty, this one’s for you. In this episode of Not Defined by Motherhood, Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers gets honest about why saying no is so hard for moms — and why you don’t owe anyone a PowerPoint...
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7:20
Why Moms Secretly Hate the Holidays (and How to Fix It Before You Burn Out)
You don’t actually hate the holidays — you hate being Santa, Mrs. Claus, the elf, the event planner, the cook, the maid, and the memory-maker all at once. In this episode of Not Defined by Motherhood, Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers g...
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6:20
Habit Stacking for Moms: The Simple Way to Reduce Overwhelm and Just Get Sh*t Done
Feeling scattered and overwhelmed? You’re not lazy—you just need better systems. In this episode of Not Defined by Motherhood, Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers breaks down habit stacking for moms—the simple, ADHD-friendly way to reduce...
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8:37
You’re Not Just a Mom: How to Reclaim Your Identity Beyond Motherhood
Motherhood is a title, not your whole story. But somewhere between diaper changes, school pick-ups, and endless laundry, it’s easy to forget who you were before kids.In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The...
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4:52
Mom Guilt Is a Liar: Why You Feel It, Where It Comes From, and How to Shut It Down
Mom guilt whispers (or sometimes screams) that you’re not doing enough, that you’re failing your kids, that every other mom has it more together than you. But here’s the truth: mom guilt is a liar.In this episode of Not Defined...
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5:48
The Mental Load of Motherhood: Why You’re Exhausted Before the Day Even Starts (and How to Lighten It)
You wake up already tired. Not just from lack of sleep - but because your brain has been running nonstop since before your feet even hit the floor. That, my friend, is the mental load of motherhood.In this episode of
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6:27
Dopamine for Moms: How Small Joys Can Help You Reclaim Yourself and Beat Burnout
Motherhood often feels like an endless to-do list, and somewhere in the chaos, your joy gets buried. But here’s the truth: you don’t need a spa weekend or a six-month sabbatical to feel alive again. What you really need are small hits of dop...
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5:41
The Myth of “Losing Yourself” in Motherhood — And How to Reclaim Your Identity
Tired of hearing that “losing yourself” in motherhood is inevitable? In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie shares why that narrative is so damaging, how to protect your sense of self, and practical ways to...
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4:41
Good Parenting Isn’t Always Rewarded With Good Behavior
If your child’s behavior has ever made you question your parenting, you’re not alone. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie breaks down why “good parenting” doesn’t always mean calm, compliant kids — and w...
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4:09
Core Values for Moms: Your Secret Weapon Against Overwhelm
If you feel pulled in a million directions, you might be making decisions without your compass — your core values. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie explains how identifying and living by your core val...
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4:47
Why You Feel Overwhelmed All the Time (and How to Pinpoint the Real Cause)
If you feel like you’re drowning in motherhood no matter how much you do, you’re not alone. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie breaks down the four hidden causes of mom overwhelm, the role your core val...
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5:01
Self-Care Isn’t a Damn Shower: What Real Self-Nurture Looks Like
Tired of being told that taking a shower counts as self-care? Same. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie redefines what self-care for moms should actually look like — without guilt, fluff, or spa-day pres...
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4:13
Expectation Detox: How Unrealistic Expectations in Motherhood Are Draining You
Feeling burned out as a mom? You’re probably carrying way more than just your kids. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie walks you through the hidden expectations moms are handed—and how they fuel burnout...
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4:35
Mom Guilt and the Thoughts You’re Afraid to Say Out Loud
Struggling with mom guilt over thoughts you’d never say out loud? You’re not alone. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie breaks down the truth about “bad mom” thoughts—why they happen, what they really me...
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4:35
Am I A Bad Mom for Feeling This Way? Why Hard Feelings Don't Define You
Ever felt frustrated, jealous, angry, or just desperate for a moment alone — and immediately wondered, “Am I a bad mom for feeling this way?” You’re not. In this episode of Not Defined By Motherhood – The Podcast, Melanie O’Re...
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6:35
Maternal Ambivalence: Embracing the Full Spectrum of Motherhood with Dr. Margo Lowy
In this powerful episode of The Mostly Under Control Podcast, Melanie O’Reilly-Rogers welcomes Dr. Margo Lowy, social worker, psychotherapist, and author of Maternal Ambivalence: Loving Moments and Bitter Truths. Together, the...
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49:50
Stop Staying Up Too Late: A Realistic Plan for Tired Moms with Revenge Bedtime Procrastination
Hey, Mostlys! Are you exhausted but still up at midnight doom-scrolling for “me-time”? Welcome to the world of Revenge Bedtime Procrastination—and yeah, it’s a thing. In this episode, we’re unpacking why moms delay sleep even when they’re runni...
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10:24
Teaching Kids About Money: Real Talk for Moms Who Don’t Know Where to Start
If you’ve ever frozen at the words, “Can I buy this?” or felt unsure how to teach your kids about saving, budgeting, or earning money—this one’s for you.Melanie sits down with Samantha Aycock—mom, realtor, and former CPA firm co-...
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42:21
