Ep 120: How My Weight Loss (or Gain) Is Connected to My Highest Self

Reflecting back on over 100 pounds lost, being a Meditation Instructor and Future Self Guide and sharing from the perspective of my weight loss journey still. I share in this video why I continue to share my weight loss quest, and how my connection with the Universe I can directly correlate with the reflection on the scale, and how easy life is when I'm serving my highest self. 

What if losing weight is as simple as connecting to your Highest Self, in as many ways you can? 

How fun is that? 

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xo
Addie B

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Transcript

Hi everybody. Addie Beall here. I'm just sitting here after the new year reminiscing about how four years ago I was, oh, over a hundred pounds heavier than I am now weighing in over 300 pounds and oh my gosh, how it's all come full circle. And I wanna share a little bit with you what came outta my magic morning pages this morning practice I do each day to get all the thoughts out and sometimes I get in flow and I get these downloads and it's just like,

ah. And it was one of those, and I really wanted to share with you, because I've just been moved to tears a few times this morning. I am out at my friend Kelly's the river house, we call it, I'm in our carriage house, right? That's slayer's layer in the basement here and it's, no, it's like gorgeous, right?

And so anyhow, I'm just so grateful to be here and be in this space and have met so many wonderful women on this quest of me setting out to lose weight. And I was thinking as I was writing and doing these morning pages this morning about how much has changed during this time, but how it can look maybe confusing because I still share my weight loss journey,

but it's really like, I don't teach you how to eat or how to lose weight. It's not like why I'm on this planet, right? I will share with you how I do and what I think like our body should have and all of that as much as you want all day long, right? And it's just something I'm constantly working through. But I keep sharing through my weight loss quest because here again,

I showed it to myself, you guys, this past quarter, I gained weight in q4 and it's kind of like one of those psychosomatic things too, right? Like, oh, every fourth quarter I'm gonna, you know, I'm a pita vata and it's like my fall season and I'm gonna gain weight. And all of these things happen right in my mind.

And I see all the thoughts, I see all that hot mess going on in there, right? You guys. And it's like watching a train wreck coming. But as I'm sitting here and thinking about the lessons I've gathered through this time that I've gained weight, again, what is so clear to me is I have disconnected from self. And the more I disconnect from my highest self,

the more the weight comes on. And this is the correlation that I am here as a spiritual leader to share with all of you, is that the closer, the more time we spend in connection with ourselves, the less we have to worry about what we do in the outside world. And that includes food, that includes your business, that includes your relationships.

The more you live in love and gratitude, the more everything else is just taken care of. And this is why it was so interesting on my food is fuel quest that on my weight loss quest, that it became, that, it became this food is fuel quest. It became this journey to figure out how to eat like a person that didn't have to watch her thoughts about it,

all the, the time that didn't have to, you know, because I see normal people, I see people that can eat normally and I'm like, I just wanna be like that to where I'm just fueling my body with fuel. And it's not an event, it's not a thing, it is just food. And some people immediately have resistance to that.

Like, oh no, but I love food. It's a, it's an experience. And look, that's great. You do you, but also ask yourself why, why do we have such an emotional attachment to this food we're putting into our body? And if we can make that emotional attachment mean something more that it's purity of even spirit. Like what you're putting in your body is what you're,

what you're fueling your body with to put into the world. And the more I fuel my body with good, healthy foods, the more, and I wanna, like, I'm trying to tie this together just on the fly, but first of all, I, I lose weight when I'm connected. So when I talk about be being connected to my highest self,

being connected to my divine self, you know, my weight loss journey brought me to the universe, brought me to God, brought me to this understanding and this knowing, it brought me to meditation. It brought me to these spiritual practices. And by spiritual practices, you guys, I mean going inside yourself and reflecting, it's not for me going to church and worshiping things outside myself.

A spiritual connection is diving within yourself, self-reflecting, knowing that the knowledge is right within you. That, that you and I are both one, that we're all one, that we're the universe. And when you get this deep connection in this knowing, then it's like so powerful. But it's also really easy to get disconnected from that highest self from that knowing space.

And that is what I see myself do when I see the scale going up. And this is why I share it through my weight loss journey. When I see the scale going up and I see it moving, it's u I can correlate it to when I'm more disconnected, when I'm missing meditations, when I'm not taking time to do my journaling or my planning or my yoga or these things that feel so good to me when I'm not creating time for that and I'm making time for all this 3D world bullshit,

right? When I'm like doing, doing, doing old corporate Addie energy and we need her, we need to do, I need to act and put this into the world, but I wanna do it from this space of just like my food is fuel quest of, you know, I'm doing it to, to fuel my body, fuel my mission fuel.

Like it's with intent, right? Like mindful eating, mindful producing, mindful all of this. And this for me, the health is a direct reflection. And even if you don't have a weight issue, right? If you have other health issues, most health issues are caused from stress in the body. And to have practices like tapping, I picked up recently and game fucking changer.

This in part actually was inspired because I got a message this morning from light seeker, one of the, one of the women in our group and she's a Chopra certified meditation instructor and going through coaching and she's, she kept saying, you know, Addie, I wanna feel what you feel when you go through your practice in the morning. She just messaged me this morning and said,

I did it all. I did my my plan, I did my meditation, I did my tapping. And she's like, oh my God, I can see what you see. And I'm like, yes, I know. And it's, it's the things, but it's not always all the things, right? It's like you will find on your path,

mine has grown. It used to be I could just, I would just go meditate for 20 minutes and I would feel this connection and I go walk in the mountain and it's evolved, right? It keeps changing. And this is why what I teach is a foundation like with the MEfirst guide and I'm starting with like building out this meditation group and this hub and the learning circle because learning meditation,

the plans you guys, this isn't just like when you head off on a weight loss quest, if you are just looking for only a way to feed your body, you're gonna be in the same boat you've been in for the last 50 years. That's what I found because I knew how to feed my body. I had done every diet, I have so much knowledge about food and how your body functions,

go ahead and test me, ask me anything, right? But that wasn't a problem. It's like when I went for weight loss surgery and they sent me this little nutritionist that was like 20 and she didn't know jack shit, she was like teaching the food pyramid. And I was, this was what, five years ago? But I already knew the food pyramid was bullshit,

right? I read the wheat belly in 2011. I was like, my game was changed forever with flour and sugar. And so anyhow, I'm sitting there and I'm just like, oh God does like should I teach her like how to like go learn proper nutrition? What are they teaching these people, right? So then I'm even more frustrated and I'm like,

look, just cut me open, sew my stomach. Cuz obviously like I'm a, I couldn't figure the rest of this out and you know, thank God I found meditation and then the life coaching, you know, found Karen Crabtree and the no bs, which was pmp, found all of that and really opened my mind to oh my god, I totally have power over this and guess where that power is right inside of me.

And so as I tried to share what I was learning and I was learning how to rewire the thoughts and you know, all of that, but it just, that wasn't the whole thing. It also is this emotional body and learning to process your emotions, which tapping is like game changing for you guys because now we take, we take this energy of you know,

understanding your thoughts and like finding your limiting beliefs. If you start doing some shadow work and stuff Like that, that you'll d you'll get into that on your self-exploration, your self-discovery journey. And it's exciting, it's fun. So keep this in mind as you're heading off on these new year weight loss goals. These big goals they say most people quit by the second week in February.

That's because it's the messy middle of the habit building cycle. If you know anything about the habit building cycle, which is why in January I'm bringing your asses a habit and meditation building workshop because I can't freaking stand it like you know, like you gotta know the habit building cycle. If you're gonna be successful at what you do and understand what is going on in your body,

knowledge is power. When you marry the knowledge with experience, now you have the wisdom. Now you can go forward and build all the habits you want. It's like having a blueprint for how to create your future self because you are your habits. So if you say, okay Slayer, that's great. I wanna create this spiritual practice too so that I can meet my highest self.

Because let me tell you this, you guys, when you meet your highest self in the morning when you meet her, when you see her in the morning, it's just beautiful. It's just like you're like the world. Like it doesn't matter, it just doesn't matter. It's just so beautiful. And listen you guys, this happened to me getting my coffee standing in Kelly's kitchen,

looking out over the river, just this over washing sense of gratitude. And I came back and I did my gratitude practice and I wrote through 10 things I'm grateful for and why. And I just sat here and I had just more gratitude building up and I had already done my courageous heart meditation and I was like doing like just in this space. And then I wrote through my magic pages and it was like I had to come tell you this message because you guys,

the closer you get to self, so don't lose track of this while you're getting all caught up in running to the gym and doing all the plans and making sure you're eating all the food and cleaning out the flour and sugar. Listen, I'm all about that too. I'm gonna be doing a lot of podcasts coming up about clearing the body, mind and soul.

I'm thinking of how I wanna put that together. But do not lose track of how powerful the time you create with yourself and stillness. And whether it's writing to your self stream of conscious writing, meditation, yoga, walking in nature, no podcasts, no nothing, just you in your brain. And if it's uncomfortable, guess what? That's cuz you need to listen.

You need to get fucking uncomfortable, you need to let it come. You need to listen to her, let yourself be still and let it come in. Cuz when it comes in it is just glorious. It is just ready to light you and the world up and that is waiting for you my sisters. It is just waiting for you to say, okay,

I'm gonna do the uncomfortable and sit still. I'm gonna try to do some things for me that don't involve doing so much, right? Like for me to sit and write and you might say, well I don't like to sit and write. I'm not fine. Find what it is for you. You know, and this is why, and I know I'm talking about the MEfirst guide process and I don't even have a way for you to come in with that.

And that's cuz you need to get your ass in my meditation group first. If you're watching this and you're not, cuz we are gonna blow that shit up this quarter. And now is the time to get in, right? Like get in, start meditating with us, start getting in this community that is working on becoming people that meditate, becoming people that put themselves first in stillness every single day.

Allowing ourselves to be uncomfortable in seeing what the hell comes up. Because that my friends, is what this life is about. As much as I sat out as writing this morning, as you know, I sat out to get this body I wanted and it brought me God isn't that beautiful? Isn't that beautiful? Through my quest of wanting this totally ego-based thing,

which is wonderful. You need to seek those things you want. And that's why I know in my million dollar goal, it's exactly where I'm supposed to seek because in finding that I'm gonna be even closer to God. And if that brings up triggers for you, you have money blocks, you have issues just like I do. You think money is evil?

You think money doesn't grow on trees, you think you have to work hard for money, you think you only have the money you have. It's all abundance, you guys, abundance of health, wealth, prosperity, it's all the same shit. Love, it's all the same stuff no matter what goal you're working on. It all comes from this place right inside of you that is available to us 24 7 and yet we're seeking everywhere else.

So my message to you today is to allow yourself the stillness. And I gotta tell you, mercury retrograde brought, brought me right here to you guys today and right now because I was literally like trying to do all the things, trying to plug my computer in. I was getting on my phone, I saw light seekers message, I'm trying to message back and it was like,

you have no service, no service at all. I'm like, I've never not had service at Kelly's house. Like what's going on? And I tried to get on my computer message Kelly for the login, all of this stuff. And I, nothing was working. And I'm like, okay, all right. And I'm, I wrote in my gratitude,

thank you for the universe to shutting all my shit down. So I made me get closer to myself again. And through this I realized, look, I was disconnected. I gained 20 pounds, which you guys, honestly for me on this quest of over 120 pounds lost is I, I've had these times where I go, I can tell you this,

I will never go up to 300 again. I know that in my soul. I also know while I'm working on this next version of myself, I've got that massive flux space. And if you follow me for a while, you know, as easily as I put on 20, I could take off 20 and I'm gonna sit there and then I'll be like this and then we're gonna,

I'm gonna step into that next south. Oh my god, Lexi was driving me to the airport, my daughter you guys and we're sitting at the, we, we pull out of the property, she's driving, I've got my phone, I'm checking in and we, she goes, oh, and I look up and the bird swoops down right in front of the car,

she almost has to stop. And it was huge. I was like, is that a hawk? I'm like, no, it's black. Is that a crow? It's a crow. It goes and it sits up on the lamp post right next to us as we're leaving. And I'm like, and she rolls the window down and we're both looking, it's like,

oh my god, that's a sign lock. She goes, yeah, you're becoming a new person again, you guys, I put the RV up if you're just new to me, I got an rv, left corporate America, then traveling the country for a few years and I'm just ready for roots and to be grounded. And my word this year is even grounded.

It's like get rooted in self, right? Like I have been flying high, I've had all the ideas, I've created all the things and now it's time to get grounded with my home. Like when I get back from Kelly's getting my place that is actually not on wheels, which part of me still like, oh, and I'm like, that's a block I need to work through and I'm gonna tap through about it's okay to have stability and listen,

I'm a Sagittarius, I'm a five year, I'm like all these things that are about exploring and travel and all of that. But something I've learned while creating my business in trying to put more out there for all of you to help you get to this self and help you get outta your own fucking way so you can create the space to get to self right?

Is that I need a space to easily create, you know, and just be able to pop up a, a thing and record a video like here when I want to have a space that is just accessible for that and my little RV was accessible for me being on it in the middle of a pandemic to be on my knees weeping and saying, what the f am I doing universe frigging show me the way.

You know what I mean? So anyhow, I know I swirled all over the place, but isn't that what you show up for? I mean come on now, go tell all your friends, you know, go tell 'em this crackpot over on, you know, a Heartsing podcast is just waiting to light your ass up, waiting to help you light your own ass up cuz your inspiration is right within you.

And you know, if you didn't pick a word of the year, if you don't do this or you don't pick intentions, I i pick my word of the year, which is my overall intention for the year. So this grounding, right? I I was really, I was even coaching on it. I was like I was in between ease and lighten this bitch up,

right? Like I'm like I need a word in between there and I don't know why, why? But it's like I want to ignite this world with what I'm here to create. But I want it to be easy. I want it to be the food is fuel quest. I want it to be. I don't care so much about food, I'm just fueling my body.

I want the lighting to be up. I want putting this meditation, the creating the million dollars, all that I want it to be from energy. And to me, you guys, that symbol of a million dollars means I've helped thousands and thousands of people to meditate to reach their highest self, to go through the MEfirst process to however, in whatever way I'm touching their life to help them get closer to their self.

And it might just be some little nugget they even pick up on the podcast, right? It's a symbol of when I'm standing there and I've seen myself in my future vision and I'm brought to my knees in gratitude, I think of all of you that I've been able to help. And that's where that gratitude and the awe, the joy and the wonder comes up.

Cuz when I get a message like I got from Paula this morning that said, I see what you see. And I'm like, cause I know it's just gonna crack wide open for just like it's for you. And oh it's just so good you guys, it's just so good. Don't give up on you. Do not give up on her that voice inside get brave.

Sit in the stillness. So find your intention and the intention being why we pick one is like when I go to make decisions throughout the year, now I'm gonna be like, is that grounding me? Is that like my overall intention and purpose? Or has my purpose changed, right? Has how I wanna like look at this year and create this year,

has it changed? And then I do that for the month, I do it for the week, I do it for the day, I do it for my hours. And in the MEfirst guide I've created this and it comes from Abraham Hicks talking in the law of attraction about intention segmentation where you go into each phone call with an intention, the person calling you knows what they want.

But you know, have you thought about what you want out of the conversation? It's every conversation in your life as you get in a car to go to the store. Are you thinking about getting there safely? Are you thinking about how you're gonna interact with the people at the store? And as we can get more and more mindful about how we're showing up and interacting with the world and it takes forethought until you become that person that just is,

you know, and even like, even when I become that person that is in so many ways, like I eat totally different than I used to, but I have times like this past, you know, couple of months for me where I've allowed greater separation of self, where I haven't done as much of my routine where I've been a little more out of pocket,

I've been better than I was prior years, right? I get better all the time because I'm constantly looking and growing and learning and saying, Hey, what can I do differently next year? What can I do differently next week? What can I do ne next moment? And how do I, how am I just getting back up? And I was talking to Kelly after she picked me up at the airport and I was like,

you know, it's just like I have no judgment over the weight over. It's like I, I just got nothing. And she's like, me too. I'm like, it's just the energy. And I know after doing this for five years now, that I will just get back in my energy and it's so hanging in there as much as I can and doing as much of this work as possible when I can and how I can so that I can dive back into the energy,

you know, and really creating that time and space for yourself. And depending on what your life looks like, it's gonna look different. And this is why I asked Jamie the Young Jedi to share her experience because we are just talking about that her, her life's totally different than mine, right? She's got two young kids, a job works at home,

the husband, all the stuff going on, right? It's totally different experience. And yet she is finding out ways to create that time for herself. And when she creates that time and she creates that plan and she does her habits, the scale moves, right? It's so much less it and it is because she has more intention about what she eats,

but she just, you just feel better. You feel better cuz you're living in love and gratitude in that fierce scarcity, running around not knowing what the fuck you're doing. Then we just eat whatever. That's what I've been doing, right? Like I, I would take some days and I'd have great intention and then other days I was like, woo-hoo,

right? And it's directly reflected to me. It's totally reflected to me. And I, I see it and I know it and I wanna make sure I share it with you because it's in this understanding that we can all learn. The more we just stay connected to the south, the more we create time to be in doing things that serve us. Whether it's out walking for you or writing or you know,

what planning, if you don't yet plan, how are you living with intention? And if you're telling yourself you just wanna be the spontaneous fly by the seat of your pan scale, why? What, what do you th why do you think you can't be spontaneous and have a plan too, right? And it's because we're scared we won't show up for our plans.

And that's a whole other podcast, right? I think I will make this the podcast this week and just let, and just let it go. And hope that get this gives you a little bit of oomph for your New Year's goals and all of that. And stay tuned on the podcast. I really wanna help everyone navigate this body, mind, and soul connection.

I'm gonna keep sharing my weight loss journey. Wow. I'm really a, a spiritual teacher of sorts. I need to just own that. I'm like, I know I was sitting here thinking, I, I know it's gotta be confusing for people being like, why is this chick weighing in and she teaches meditation and because they're connected. Because when I am,

when I'm meditating, when I am taking care of myself, my inner self, my soul, and my spirit, the scale just drops. It's fucking amazing really. And it's the easiest solution. And yet I'll do it too, you guys. I'll be like, ah, I'm gonna do this and that and this and that. And look, I wanna know how to fuel my body to my highest capacity.

You know, I love learning about the biohacks. I love the biome test and understanding my gut health and my microbiome and trying to heal my body. But I also know that all of that can be done the closer I am to my divine self, to being in the quantum realm, if you will, the infinite field of possibilities. The more time and energy I spend there,

the more all of those things come. So while you're out there planning and running around doing all the shit and all the things for yourself, and if you don't have a support group, if you don't have people that are helping you through the habit process, find them. Get in the Heartsing podcast group and engage in the community. Join our meditation group.

Like start engaging yourself in community that helps you move forward with your goals in where you're gonna start understanding the habit building process too. Okay, you guys, that's all I got for today. Hat over to Addie b.com. I will be working on updating the website and getting some of this up, but there'll still be links to the meditation, things like that.

Listen, you can always message me like I'm all about a good email of PM on Facebook at Addie Beal, and I am here for that all day long to be able to help any of you that wants some help and just don't know where to start. Reach out and I can help. All right my lovelies, go out, make some time for yourself,

create it, enjoy it. And happy New Year witches and bitches. I'm dying to hear your word of the year or two. Let me know. Slayer out.