Stuck in the “I’ll Quit Someday” Trap? 6 Quitting Alcohol Tips That Actually Help You Stop Drinking

Are you stuck in the “I’ll quit someday” cycle? Maybe you’ve promised yourself you’ll stop drinking after the holidays, once work slows down, or when life feels less stressful. But here’s the truth: waiting for someday only keeps you trapped.

In this episode of the Sober Vibes Podcast, I’m sharing six practical tips to quit drinking that will help you finally take action. Whether you want to commit to 30 days without alcohol, learn how to stop drinking every night, or break free from the habit of drinking wine to cope with stress.

What You Will Learn In This Episode:

• Why bargaining with alcohol keeps you stuck in the moderation cycle
• How focusing on one day at a time makes sobriety less overwhelming
• Simple ways to create emotional safety nets so you don’t cave under pressure
• How to replace the “reward loop” of alcohol with healthier habits
• Why taking messy action matters more than waiting until you feel ready
• The power of finding a sober community and the right support system

If you’ve been telling yourself you’ll quit “someday,” this episode will show you how to start today.

Resources Mentioned:

Sober 1:1 Coaching 

The Sobriety Circle 

The After-Emotional Sobriety Guide

Subscribe to the Sober Vibes Podcast on YouTube

Free Resources

PODCAST SPONSOR:

This episode is sponsored by Soberlink, a trusted accountability tool for anyone navigating early recovery. Whether you're rebuilding trust with loved ones or want more structure in your sobriety, Soberlink offers a discreet and empowering way to stay on track.

Sober Vibes listeners get $50 off their device!
Grab your discount here!

Hope this episode helps you today, and welcome to season 7!

Thank you for listening! Help the show by Rating, Reviewing, and/or Subscribing to the Sober Vibes Podcast.

Connect w/ Courtney:
Instagram
Join the Sobriety Circle

Apply for 1:1 Coaching
Order the Sober Vibes Book

Chapters

• 0:00 The Someday Trap of Quitting Alcohol
• 8:02 Season Seven Introduction
• 9:51 Six Tips to Quit Drinking Now
• 11:06 Building Emotional Safety Nets
• 12:44 Support Beyond Willpower
• 19:52 Your Future Self Will Thank You

Transcript

Courtney Andersen : 0:00

Have you been telling yourself I'll quit drinking someday? Someday after the holidays, someday when I have more time on my hands to focus in on me, right when things, when life slows down, when I get the dream job, I will quit. When I leave this prick that I'm married to. I will then not need to drink alcohol like I did to deal with him or her. Okay, this is all that quote-unquote someday of when you will quit drinking alcohol, but I want to tell you that waiting for the someday is what's going to keep you stuck in that drinking, that moderation cycle that you've been stuck in for a very long time. And in today's episode, I'm sharing six quitting alcohol tips that are actually going to help you stop drinking and start living.

Courtney Andersen : 0:53

Welcome to Sober Vibes, your podcast for alcohol-free lifestyle tips and real talk about long-term sobriety. I'm your host, courtney Anderson, sober coach author and mom. Each week, I share strategies, stories and encouragement to help you navigate cravings, build confidence and thrive in sobriety. Whether you're sober, curious or years in, this is your space to feel supported and inspired. Welcome back to the Sober Vibes podcast. I am your host, courtney Anderson. I'm a sober coach author and one of your biggest cheerleaders on this alcohol-free journey. You are listening to episode 240, and this is the start of season seven. Super stoked about this, we are now on YouTube with the podcast, with video. So if you are a YouTube fan, please go over and subscribe to the podcast and now you can catch this on video.

Courtney Andersen : 1:52

I've been wanting to do this for a long time, but we're here right. So, again, thank you for joining me. If you've been here with me for day one, I appreciate you, and if you are here new welcome, say hello or reach out to me or comment in the section over on YouTube and introduce yourself, because I love, love, love, love, love. Getting to know y'all. It really warms my heart. Anytime you guys message me through email or on Sober Vibes Instagram page, I love it because I just love connecting to the people, the human beings and the faces. Connect the listeners faces and get to see who's who's listening, because it's a really podcasting, is a really funny thing and I've been saying this for a long time on the show. It's like when I do these solo episodes, it's hysterical, because this then is heard, now seen throughout the world, and I don't know who's listening. Only when you present yourself, then I get to know who's listening, right?

Courtney Andersen : 3:01

So today we're going to talk about this someday trap. Ok, and I know it well because I spent four years living in that cycle, right. So at 25, I knew that there was going to be a day I gave up alcohol for good, but I didn't know how I was going to get there. Right, but from 25 to 29, I was in this four year moderation trap. 25 to 29, I was in this four-year moderation trap and, honestly, that is hell.

Courtney Andersen : 3:32

And when you get out of it you see how much alcohol rules your world, no matter what type of drinker you identify with. Or for everybody who is in that alcohol use disorder spectrum of it, there's that emotional dependency and everybody's drinking looks different of it. There's that emotional dependency and everybody's drinking looks different. But for me, particularly when I quit, I saw the freedom that was on the other side of no longer drinking and in sobriety, and it's mind boggling and it's something that I can't even express to you. You get to see that and feel that on your own and then you'll be like, oh, I know what this bitch was talking about. I see this now of what a trap that I was in with alcohol. So again.

Courtney Andersen : 4:14

I'm gonna give you six tips today to quit drinking and instead of waiting for that someday and I really hope that these resonate with you as always feel free to reach out to me and if you are needing help in your next step, feel free to apply below to work with me one-on-one and we'll get on a consult call or two. You can always check out my book Sober Vibes A Guide to Thriving in your First Three Months Without Alcohol. I will link that all in the show notes below and enjoy. Enjoy that book, because it's two years now, two years since I wrote it and it's still helping people all over the world. So thank you so much for reading it.

Courtney Andersen : 4:51

All right, let's get into it today. So let's go with tip number one you have to stop negotiating with alcohol. I know Someday is usually code, for I don't want to let this go yet. Okay, and also to that it's very overwhelming to think of life without alcohol, the forever of it. I know that very well. Seriously, my heart goes out to anybody starting in starting this journey because it is it's very effing overwhelming. It very is okay also too. I just want to add a note.

Courtney Andersen : 5:30

I don't know if I said this in season six. But my little dictator is getting to the point. You guys, this is where this bit me in the butt, right? He's been repeating stuff, and really the last year, and so I am trying to clean up my language. So if you don't hear as many F-bombs, it's because I am trying. You've been listening to the show for a long time. I love a good F-U-C-K, okay, but I'm really trying to clean this up. So I'm making a very conscious effort, even on everything in my life, of not to swear, because even though I have a mouth of a sailor, I do not need a little four-year-old dictator running around on that playground in those streets telling other kids to F-U-C-K Okay. So let's get back into the podcast.

Courtney Andersen : 6:26

So the Sunday is again. I know how overwhelming it can be to start at day one and be like, oh my God, is this forever? Okay, it's it, just don't think about it like that. But it is in the process of I don't. I don't know if I'm ready to fully let this go, or I don't want to say that I'm never drinking again, because then what if I drank? How's that going to make me look right? So another tip too, with this is bargaining keeps alcohol in control. It truly does. And the sooner you stop negotiating, the sooner you start to heal and get into that recovery process. Okay, to heal and get into that recovery process, okay. Tip number two focus on one day, just one day, and in my two framework of coaching, I am just focused on today. We are not going to, it's not gonna be. We're not focusing on forever, because forever is going to keep you stuck and inside that overwhelming feeling of I can never do this right. Okay, so the I can never drink again. It feels impossible when you feel the way that you do in these early days. So we need to reframe this to I don't have to drink today, that's it. I don't have to drink today.

Courtney Andersen : 7:45

Next, 24-hour blocks are what make long sobriety possible, long-term sobriety possible. In that beginning, in that first year, it really like the one day at a time is the best advice and, I hope, any advice that you, that people give you. That one like you, just have to think about today. You just have to think about today and every day, another day sober. Is you then getting a bunch of days in a row? Right? But you just have to focus on that one and 24 hours is all we have. All we can control is today. I have no control over tomorrow or the next day or the next day. What I can do is control what my actions are going to be like today, and that is not drinking, okay.

Courtney Andersen : 8:41

Tip number three you need to build emotional safety nets. Life will never be perfect. When you quit, there will never be the calm. There will never be the calm. It might always feel very chaotic, right, but if you quit today, that is going to help eventually bring in the calm into your life. Right Journals, podcasts, sober communities, routines they do equal your safety nets. They truly do, because that is when you're listening to somebody understanding it, but also to journaling your own thoughts, to getting your thoughts out on paper. Quitting is about new coping, not escaping stress. So when you quit alcohol, you're going to then start experiencing some new coping mechanisms and you truly have to figure out what works best for you, because every person, every human being, is different with what works, with their personality.

Courtney Andersen : 9:36

Tip number four replace the reward loop. Alcohol was your reward. Your brain still needs rewards. This is why I'm a huge, huge, huge fan, and if you've listened to this podcast for a long time or you've worked with me, either my one-on-one or my sobriety circle. You do hear me say you need to find a new reward system.

Courtney Andersen : 9:59

I'm not saying then go into a new addiction, but I don't know. Why don't you just go out on seven days sober? You go treat yourself to an ice cream. You go buy new jam jams at Target. You can tell of the stage of my life where I, you go buy new jam jams at Target. You can tell of the stage of my life where I'm using the word jam jams. Okay, because of having a four-year-old. Something, just a something.

Courtney Andersen : 10:21

Because when you deprive yourself, when you stop drinking, it feels like deprivation. It feels, oh my God, I'm giving up so much because there's so much tied into alcohol. But if you start rewarding yourself with something new, you don't feel as though that you are so deprived. Okay, so, like swamp in some sober treats, like mocktails, right, give yourself some extra sober care, some baths, some walks that is free. Buy yourself some flowers. Ooh, I just hit 14 days. I'm going to go get a new book. That's not personal development and I'm just going to get lost in a new book, right? So you got to teach yourself that joy still exists without booze. Hey, good people of the world, it's Courtney. And if you're in your first year or your fifth year of sobriety, let's be real.

Courtney Andersen : 11:14

Summers can be tough, like a very, very, very challenging. It took me a couple summers to finally feel comfortable. There's something about warm weather, parties and poolside drinks that can make it feel like everybody's drinking but you. But just because drinking culture ramps up, especially during this time, doesn't mean your progress has to slow down. That's where a tool like Soberlink can help. It's a high-tech breathalyzer that helps people in recovery stay accountable, not through shame, but through structure, scheduled daily tests. Let you share instant, verified results with the people who support you, so you don't have to do it alone, worried someone might question your results. They can't, because Soberlink uses facial recognition and tamper detection, so there's no way to cheat it. Whether you're rebuilding trust or you just want that extra layer of support this summer, soberlink is here to help you stay the course of your journey. I've witnessed people benefit from Soberlink and I want you to be the next. Visit wwwsoberlinkcom. Forward slash sober dash vibes to sign up and receive 50% off your device today. You can also check the link in the show notes below Tip number five take action before you feel ruddy.

Courtney Andersen : 12:42

Waiting until you're ruddy is what's going to keep you stuck, because alcohol is never alcohol, doesn't want you to leave it, and that's the whole thing. Waiting until you're ready, you're not going to be there, because nobody is ever fully ready to give up booze. When I gave it up, yes, I was ready, but of course there was still part of me where I'm like, oh God, I loved drinking, okay, but I knew at that time it was just like it was the end of summer no, actually, because it was August 18th, so like middle or, yeah, towards the end of summer. But I was about to turn 30 and October 5th six weeks, so like I wasn't ready to give it up that time, because it was like, how am I going to celebrate my 30th birthday? How am I going to get married without alcohol? So you cannot wait until you're ready, because that day is never going to come. It's never going to come. It's going to come when you're good and tired of living in that cycle and then start making that daily choice to give up alcohol.

Courtney Andersen : 13:43

Okay, and the confidence comes after action and not before. So once you make that decision, it's okay. Then make the appropriate steps and in those appropriate steps, in another day sober. In another day, sober. In another day, sober you're going to start building up that confidence within yourself. First and messy first steps are steps. So, even if that is, you quit and then a couple weeks in you slip, but then you get back on it and you keep going.

Courtney Andersen : 14:12

It doesn't look perfect for everybody. It really truly doesn't. And it's interesting now, in a day where social media especially too, with the rise in the last couple of years of more and more people talking about sobriety and sober influencers and you're like but they didn't struggle like this, but you don't know that, and I would bet a million dollars with anybody, that majority of people that quit drinking alcohol. It took them a process to get there before they finally said I was done where it looked very messy for them. Okay. Tip number six get support beyond willpower, said I was done where it looked very messy for them. Okay. Tip number six get support beyond willpower. So willpower will run out. Okay, you can. There's only so much willpower that you have, but support will last you and keep you going, whether that's coaching, community accountability, that all equals lasting sobriety. If you do that work, with that right. And then again, when it comes to support, you don't have to do this alone, and a lot of people try to do it alone because there's so much shame wrapped up into this and so much will like why I can do everything else. I get up in the middle of the night, like I sorry, not in the middle of the night, I'm sorry In the morning time. I can get my workouts in, I eat, right, I have the kids dialed in, I have my job. I am like I am wonder effing woman, right. Yeah, where you're like. But this is the one thing I cannot do. I can't do it by myself, and I do believe that there is a system designed in this and there has been for many, many, many, many, many years. With anything if you're struggling, is that community does help and support does help. So you don't feel like you're so alone in this journey. So you don't feel like you're so alone in this journey. I can't even tell you how many women I've worked with where it was like once I signed up with you, that was like me being like I'm done, like this is my accountability and support, which I'm totally fine with because you get to that point where it's enough is enough and I need help outside of myself, okay, so if you've been stuck in that someday trap, hear me on this and I've said this a lot the perfect day to quit doesn't exist, but today does Like. Today is the perfect time for you to quit drinking alcohol and if this is the start of your journey, this is the start of it and it's a perfect day to do so. You have everything you need to take the first step just for today and focus on today. Okay, your future self will look back and thank you for choosing actions over continuously waiting. Two stories on continuously waiting. When I had my kid back four years ago, avi, a lot of women who had quit drinking after their child was a certain age would text me and be like or DM me and say you're so lucky to be doing this sober. I wish I would have gotten sober sooner to appreciate those years and be fully in it. Right, okay, and then so that I've always taken with me to and other too, with coaching women who are older and their children are out of the house. It's like, why didn't I do this sooner? I think for a lot of people it's like why didn't I do this sooner? But the sooner would have never happened because you weren't ready then. So for people who are struggling and listening to this right now, take note that, like it, listen to these people who have sobriety and what their regret is, and their regret is why didn't I do this sooner? So if you're at that point where you're listening to this episode and it's this bitch is right, I need to do this, then the time is for now, because it's only going to get worse that relationship you have with booze as time goes on. This is not something that you can control and as we age, it just gets worse and worse and more and more things will happen. Just because they haven't happened yet does not mean that they're not going to okay. So, because no one is invincible when it comes to booze and it might just show up, it might look something different, like it could look like health issues, not necessarily a DUI. You might not be in the court system, but your health and or relationships with people around you are going to start looking different, because this isn't something that you can keep hiding right. So your future self will thank you for being like all right. This is September when this episode comes out September of 2025. I am no longer going to live like this, right. So if you're ready to stop waiting, let's take the next step together. Again, apply below to work with me for my one-on-one coaching, or you can even check out my book Sober Vibes A Guide to Thriving in your First Three Months Without Alcohol. So all of the links are in the show notes below. Before I end this episode, just a quick heads up about next week's episode. I'm coming prepared. In season seven, I'll be diving into the connection between alcohol and stress, so we'll talk about why so many of us turn to drinking as a stress reliever and how to build healthier ways to cope. So you won't want to miss that. All right, as always. Thank you for listening and keep on trucking. Thank you.