328. Divorce Anxiety: When You Can’t See Your Future, Do This

There’s a moment after divorce that almost no one prepares you for.

Not the chaos.
Not the legal process.
Not even the grief.

But the moment when everything finally gets quiet…
and you realize:

“I have no idea what my life is supposed to look like anymore.”

In this premium episode, Coach Tiffini steps in with something different.

Not more advice.
Not more overthinking.

But a guided experience designed to help you:

– Calm the anxiety that keeps your mind spinning
 – Step out of survival mode, even briefly
 – Reconnect with your own inner direction
 – And identify your next step… without needing the whole plan

Because the truth is:

You don’t feel stuck because you’re broken.
You feel stuck because your nervous system is overwhelmed, trying to protect you...And when that happens…clarity disappears.

Inside this episode, you’ll be gently guided through a visualization and reflection process that helps you find your footing again—even if your future still feels foggy.

This isn’t about figuring everything out.

It’s about learning how to move forward
 when you can’t see the whole path yet.

✨ If you’ve been feeling frozen, overwhelmed, or disconnected from your direction…

This is the episode to press play on.

👉 Unlock this guided experience inside The Room Where It Happens
(our private premium feed for deeper healing, coaching, and real transformation)

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MyCoachDawn

Instagram: (@dawnwiggins)

Instagram: (@coachtiffini)

On the Web: https://www.mycoachdawn.com

A podcast exploring the journey of life after divorce, delving into topics like divorce grief, loneliness, anxiety, manifesting, the impact of different attachment styles and codependency, setting healthy boundaries, energy healing with homeopathy, managing the nervous system during divorce depression, understanding the stages of divorce grief, and using the Law of Attraction and EMDR therapy in the process of building your confidence, forgiveness and letting go.

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Transcript

The Fear Of An Unknown Future

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hi gorgeous, Coach Tiffany here, and I am hijacking the pod for a minute. One thing I hear from my clients all the time during divorce is this. I can't even imagine what my future looks like anymore. And that moment can feel terrifying because the life you thought you were building toward just disappeared. And now you're standing in this strange in-between where you can't see the path ahead. So today I want to walk you through a short guided exercise that can help you quiet the anxiety, reconnect with yourself, and discover what the next step on your path might be, even if the future still feels foggy. If you've been feeling stuck in that in-between after divorce, this episode will help you find your footing again.

SPEAKER_00 0:45

Hi, love. Welcome to Dear Divorce Diary, the podcast helping divorcees go beyond talk therapy to process your grief, find the healing you crave, and build back your confidence. I'm your host, Don Wiggins, a therapist, coach, integrative healer, and divorce guy. Join me for a fresh approach to healing grief and building your confidence after divorce.

Guided Visualization On The Path

Journaling Prompts And What To Notice

Small Wins And Trusting Yourself

Program Invite And How To Join

SPEAKER_01 1:19

I made the decision to leave, made the decision to move to a new city, I picked out the condo I was going to live in, the daycare my daughter was going to go to, the job I was going to have. And all of a sudden I sat there one night and I'm like, what the hell do I do now? All the decisions are made and all I have to do is walk forward. And all I'm doing right now is completely freezing because I cannot figure out how the rest of my life is going to look like. I had an idea, right? I was going to be a military wife for the rest of my life. I already knew the plan. And now the plan got blown up. So what's next? If that's where you are right now, I want you to know that you're not alone. You're simply hanging out in that in between. When we're going through divorce in the aftermath of everything that it causes, all of us are in survival mode. We have a million decisions to make a day. So just trying to make it through the day is really challenging. Our brain is trying to protect us constantly. So constantly scanning for danger, replaying the past, bringing up all those old arguments and conversations. And then on top of that, we're still trying to co-parent and be cordial with somebody that we couldn't even communicate with in the marriage, let alone now. A whole new future can seem almost impossible. But here's what I've learned from working from women in this season of life that just because you can't see your future clearly yet, it doesn't mean that there isn't a path unfolding right in front of you. Sometimes all we need is to just take a moment to step out of the noise, cut the overthinking, and reconnect with ourselves. So today I want to walk you through a short visualization and give you some journaling prompts to reflect back. Please don't feel like you have to do this perfectly. There is nothing to figure out or get right. I just want you to let your mind and your body go where they want to go. If you're driving, do not do this. Save it for later. But if you can, I would love for you to find a comfortable spot, take a deep breath, and let yourself drop in with me for a few moments. Let's get started. I want you to go ahead and gently close your eyes. Take a slow breath in through your nose and a longer breath out through your mouth. Again, let's inhale slowly and exhale and push it out. I want you to let those shoulders soften. Unclench that jaw. And just feel the support of the bed or the chair underneath you. Now imagine that you are standing on a quiet path. Behind you is a landscape that represents the life you've already lived, the relationship, the marriage, the survival years. You don't need to analyze it, but just notice that it's there behind you. Notice how it feels to simply acknowledge that you walked through it. You survived it. You moved through it. Take a moment to thank the version of you who got you here. Now turn your attention to the path in front of you. This path represents the part of life that you're in right now. In between. Maybe the path is foggy. Maybe you can only see a few steps ahead. Maybe it curves where you can't really see around the bend. Just notice what it looks like. Many people feel pressure to know exactly where this path goes. But right now you don't need to know the destination. All you need to do is notice that the ground beneath your feet is solid. Feel your feet on the path. You are supported here. As you stand on this path, imagine that the woman you are today steps fully into view. Not the version you were in survival and not the future version who has everything figured out. But just the woman you are right now. Look at her with curiosity. What do you notice about her? Maybe she looks tired. Maybe she looks stronger than she realizes. Maybe she looks softer or wiser or more cautious. Notice what she's learned. Notice what she no longer tolerates. And notice the strength she carries now that she didn't before. Now I want you to notice the fog ahead on the path. The part where you can't see exactly what's coming. And instead of trying to clear the fog, just notice what it feels like in your body to stand here. Breathing. Supported Alive in this moment. You don't have to solve the future right now. You only have to trust the woman standing on this path. Take one small step forward. Just one. And notice that the ground appears beneath your foot as you move. Another step. You still don't know the whole path, but the next step keeps revealing itself. Now imagine placing a hand over your heart and silently tell yourself I don't have to know everything right now. I only have to trust myself for the next step. I want you to feel the truth of that in your body. You've navigated uncertainty before. And you're navigating it again now. Now gently bring your awareness back to the room. Feel the chair or the bed supporting you. Feel your feet on the floor. And take one slow breath in and a long breath out. And when you feel ready, slowly open your eyes. How is that? I've got some questions that I would love for you guys to answer. So you can kind of jot these down. Here's the first one. What did you notice about the woman standing on the path? Next. What did the fog ahead feel like in your body? Did anything surprise you about what you saw or felt? What does the next step feel like for you right now? And the last one is pretty huge. When you saw the woman standing on the path, what does she wish you would trust about her? Now, guys, before you rush back into the rest of your day, I want you to take one more slow breath. Just notice how you feel right now. One of the biggest lies that we believe during divorce is that we're stuck. We're never going to find love. We're never going to find our community again. Never going to find true friendship. We don't trust our lives anymore because we can't see the whole path. And we sure as hell don't trust ourselves sometimes, especially not post-divorce. But a lot of times what we try to tell ourselves is that because we can't see that whole path, we must not be moving forward. And the truth is that healing is not going to show up as a perfectly mapped-out plan. It's going to show up in small moments. Meeting a new friend, finding a new hobby, being able to fall asleep at the end of the day without the anxiousness, being able to wake up in the morning and not feeling like the whole floor is going to drop out from underneath of you. Just that small sense of possibility that maybe wasn't there before yesterday. So I want to remind you guys that you don't have to know the whole future today. You just have to be willing to take the next step that feels honest for you. And that's why we celebrate the small wins on the pod because the small wins turn into huge change and healing. And the beautiful thing about all this, guys, is that the more you reconnect with yourself, the more that that path is going to reveal itself to you. I know that the stillness is scary. I know that in the beginning, when everything is quiet and the kids are away for the weekend and you're in that brand new place and it feels foreign, that all you want to do is just cry because the feelings are heavy. Everything feels heavy. But there is clarity in that stillness. There is a peace with being able to reconnect to yourself and discover another step on the path. And if you're listening to this right now and you're thinking, okay, I don't really want to walk this path alone. You really don't have to. It's designed specifically for women moving through divorce. Inside that program, you'll get coaching with me, plus homeopathic support, all the good stuff that we talk about on the pod. Yes, IFS. We do IFS in there too. We want to help regulate your nervous system in this program. We want to help quiet the anxiety. We want to truly help you be able to have the tools to move through this season of life. The enrollment is open now through April 30th. So if you feel like it's something you want to learn more about, I would absolutely love to walk alongside of you in this. Drop us an email to hello at my coach Don that just says tell me more, and we'll reach out to schedule a call to tell you all about it. I want to thank you guys from the bottom of my heart for joining me today. I want to encourage you to keep walking your path.

SPEAKER_00 14:44

Just take that one small step forward every day and trust your journey.com.