The Mind Body Project
The Mind Body Project
Sit & Talk: Letting Go Of 2025 To Receive More In 2026
We explore how to loosen our grip on last year’s wins and wounds, swap the light-switch myth for a dimmer-switch plan, and practice forgiveness that frees mental space. Open hands, open arms, and a forward gaze set us up for a healthier 2026.
• finding weekly topics and resources in the app and texts
• why a closed fist can’t receive new good
• choosing what to leave behind and what to reframe
• honest checks on joy versus long-term benefit
• identifying negative people, places, and habits
• dimmer switch approach to behavior change
• forgiveness as a gradual, self-freeing process
• windshield over rearview mindset for momentum
• health costs of chronic anger and fight-or-flight
• practical challenge to enter 2026 with openness
Welcome to Sit and Talk. Thanks for taking time to join us today. This is your first time each week. We have a conversation. We join our live call each week where those on the live call might have questions, comments, some thoughts as I share a just a topic that that hope uh that strengthens our mental conditioning and makes a difference in how we think, how we act. And so we share that each week. So thanks for joining us here on Sit and Talking. Let's join our live call. What are we leaving behind in 2025? That is exactly right.
SPEAKER_01:Uh how we're supposed to know these topics. Are they somewhere that I'm not I'm not seeing them? Yes, they are every week.
SPEAKER_00:You you get my text messages, right, Renee?
SPEAKER_01:Yeah.
SPEAKER_00:I send out a picture every Sunday.
SPEAKER_01:Yeah, yeah. It's got the treadmill stuff on it.
SPEAKER_00:Yep, and at the bottom it has our topics.
SPEAKER_01:You have to click on it though to see it all. Oh. Oh, okay. That's fine. I was gonna say I don't see it. Okay. Okay.
SPEAKER_00:So you yeah, click on it like it's a picture, and then it'll tell you everything we're doing.
SPEAKER_01:So, so so you keep asking that, and I was thinking, hi Michael, how about the note things?
SPEAKER_00:So, so so then also on Mindful Mondays, it has the topic, so it's the exact same thing that you can go on the podcast and find that topic. Because it man, it should always be on Mondays. It should be the very episode that comes up because it comes out um on Monday mornings at 5 a.m.
SPEAKER_01:So it's there.
SPEAKER_00:So, and then I really try all the topics we talk about during the week, whether it's sit and talk or healthy huddle, usually by the end of the week, those are also on the app. And then the next week on Wednesdays and Fridays, they come out on the podcast. Um, so so if it's something really good and you want to tell somebody, listen to it, then you can tell them the next week to go listen to it. Um, or if you need a reminder, you can go look in the app, usually by the end of the week. So, all the things. So, we are going to talk about what are we leaving behind in 2025? So, as you think about that, how many of you thought um about negative things you're leaving behind? Was there was there pro was there probably a plethora? Um, that's a lot, that means a lot you of negative things that you want to leave behind.
SPEAKER_01:Yes.
SPEAKER_00:Was there very many positive things you want to leave behind?
SPEAKER_01:No, because I want to keep those.
SPEAKER_00:You you want to keep those, yeah. Typically, um we want to keep those. So we are gonna talk about um some of those negative things that probably you thought about. Um, and how do we decide we're gonna leave those behind? Um, but before we do that, I want to start with some positive. Um, so I'm gonna try to do this demonstration with myself. Um, I did walk and talk, it works a whole lot better, but so I'm gonna do it with myself um and kind of it so we can kind of talk about it. So I got a I have a dollar here, okay. And the illustration I used asked for somebody in walk and talk to come and help me and Kim help me, but so I'm just gonna use one hand. So I'm gonna give the dollar myself and I'm gonna hold it real tight, and so my fist is really, really tight. Um, and I have the dollar here in my hand, and I'm holding on to it really, really tight. Well, in my other hand, I have two more dollars, and I want to put it in this hand, but I can't let go of this dollar, and I can't release my grip. I have to keep it really, really tight. Um, but I want these two dollars. So how how do I get these two dollars? What do I have to do? But I can't get them.
SPEAKER_01:Put it in your mouth. Put it in your mouth.
SPEAKER_00:No, it has to be in my hand. And and we talked about it. You don't you don't want these dollars in your mouth because you know, as I told them the other day, they came from the club, and you don't you don't know what happened there.
SPEAKER_01:Shove it in your bra.
SPEAKER_00:So so you're missing the important part. I want to grab it. I gotta open up. So when I open up and I release that dollar, look what I can do. I can now put more dollars on top of that, and so many times we we do that exact same thing. There may have been some good things that happened in 2025, and so you're going into 2026 with a tight fist, you're not letting them go because oh my gosh, they are so awesome. But sometimes we can still hold those things as we go into 2025, as I held that dollar, I just held it a little looser. But sometimes is what we do, we go into 2025 and we release our grip on those good things so we can have an open hand and open arms going into 2026 to receive more. Because if we hold on to those things sometimes from years past, even though they're good, they keep us from receiving more in the next year, in the next season. Um, and I think sometimes we always think about what we're gonna leave behind in 2025, but it is usually negative. But maybe it's that tight grip we have, maybe on that good thing in 2025, that maybe we loosen our grip and we open up and we and when you go for a hug, when you go to give somebody a hug, do you cross your arms and go to hug them? I mean, you do you walk up to them and try to hug them with arms crossed? What do you if it's somebody you haven't seen in a while? What do you do?
SPEAKER_01:Reach out.
SPEAKER_00:Reach out because this is a universal symbol of I'm opening up to you, I'm accepting you. You come into me. I am ready to receive your hug. And that's how we should go into a new year. There's things that we we hold on tight, and we can't receive those things that we were meant to get in the next season and the next year because we're going with our look, little Riggie, our grandson, he always does this. He crosses his arms and makes a face. I mean, super funny, but it's not funny when you're an adult and you're complaining because you're not getting enough. So when we do that, we we just hang on to what we got. Instead of sometimes we have to release it so we can open up to receive more. And and think about that as we go into 2026. We are going to talk about how do we decide some of those negative things we leave behind, but also as we leave those behind, good and bad, go into the new year with arms open, palms up, so you are ready to receive what 2026 has to offer. Some things will be really good. You know, there's some people, you know, people that can give a really good hug.
SPEAKER_01:Yes.
SPEAKER_00:And there's some people that just give you the old little pat there. My daughter-in-law, she gives a really good hug. Um, she's a good hugger, and it's just one of those hugs that makes you feel good. And that's kind of how you want to be able to receive 2026 is give it a hug that it feels good. So, how do we how do we decide what we're gonna leave behind in 2025? Because as you mentioned, there is a plethora, plethora, plethora, plethora of things you probably want to leave behind. And there are probably some negative things, and so you think, how am I gonna leave all that behind? So, we're gonna talk about a few of the things, and then we're also gonna talk about how do you kind of decide what to do, how to do it. So, one of the things is maybe you just maybe it's those things that are not bringing you joy, and and that we kind of have to be careful on. We have to be really honest with ourselves, we have to have those honest conversations. Sometimes we don't like quiet time by ourselves. Why? Because you can hear yourself think, you can hear yourself think, and then you have to have a conversation with yourself, and you some we sometimes we don't like that. So when it comes to what's not bringing us joy, we have to be really reflective and honest with ourselves and say, is it not bringing me joy because I don't like it? Because it's hard. What's the reason for it? Sometimes you might say, treadmill class does not bring me joy. It does not sometimes, it does not, especially when you have to maybe you have to do a grumpy Grinch climb. Sometimes when you have to do a Santa dash or a Rudolph dash, root off run, root off run. Sometimes it doesn't bring you joy, but it's making you better, and you know that. So there's that fine line of, is it good for me? And maybe I just need to change my perspective on it. And so there are some things sometimes that aren't bringing us joy, and they are things that need to be left, but sometimes we leave behind not the thing that's not bringing us joy, but we bring we leave behind our old perspective. Our old perspective, how we looked at it. Um, if we go to the gym every day and go, this is the dumbest thing, I hate this thing. Um, Dick Van Dyke, he just turned a hundred. Everybody knows who Dick Van Dyke is, hopefully. Um, but Dick Van Dyke just turned a hundred. Um and he exercises uh every day. Um and he's I mean, you listen to him talk, he's good mentally. I mean, he can do crisscross applesauce um on the ground, reach to the, if you know what that is, it's crisscross Indian style, and he can reach towards the ground because he does those things because it he wants to live a long, healthy life that he can move in. So sometimes when we come to exercise, we may not enjoy that moment, but we have the perspective changes looking at what will it do us do for us in the future? What will that do for our health, our wellness, our mobility as we become parents, grandparents, great-grandparents? How does that look? And so we have to we we leave behind sometimes we leave behind those things that aren't bringing us joy because we really uh reflect on it, go, that is really something that I've worked on my perspective, and it hasn't changed, it's just not bringing me joy. And it's okay. It's okay to leave those things if you're honest with it about it. Um, but but sometimes it's just you leave in the this the year or the season before you leave that perspective that you had, and you go into the new year, the new season with a different perspective, um, which really does change how we experience people, places, and things. Um, so we look at that and say, what am I am I leaving that thing that's a joy, or am I leaving my perspective? Which one am I gonna do? I mean, again, you have to be really honest with yourself because we really want to do what feels good. And just doing what feels good is not always the right thing. Sometimes we are wrong about it and we need to change how we look at it. Uh sometimes what we need to leave behind is what is uh what negativity is pulling us down? Is it a person? Is it a place? Is it a thing? And sometimes is it is that thing that's pulling you down, that negative thing? Is it you? And if it's you, how do we leave you in 2025? Is it possible to leave you in 2025? No, I mean no. Okay. Just making sure that we can't clone ourselves and leave our old self in 2025. We gotta bring it, bring her with us. Um so how do we how do we change that? And if we are that negative thing pulling us down, um, because we're always with us. Um if there's negativity pulling you down, sometimes it's a person. Um, sometimes we can distance ourselves from that person. Um, sometimes it is a place. We don't necessarily have to go there, or maybe it's a workplace, so we can change maybe our workplace. Maybe we can change the um the culture of our workplace. We can be the change. This next week um we're gonna be talking about be the coffee bean. How do you change your environment? Um, because sometimes, again, it goes back to be the ripple. You can be the ripple, you can change the culture, you can change the environment, and you can change the place. Um and so how if if we're gonna leave the old stinky, the old negative thinking you in 2025, we have to change our stinky thinking. So if if we leave the old us in 2025, if we um if we do that, then so if if you decide that it's your negative thinking, you're the negative problem. Um, because we've all talked, we've talked about multiple times about how we have those negative um revolving thoughts over and over and over. Um and you say, okay, I'm going into 2026, a new me, uh, what is it, a new year, new me. Um, so on December 31st at 11 59, I have all these negative thoughts. On January 1st at 12 o'clock a.m. Are they all going away?
SPEAKER_01:No.
SPEAKER_00:No. No. It's but yet we expect that. Every year with New Year's resolutions, why don't they work? Because we go in and we assume that we're gonna flip a switch and everything's gonna be uh fixed. So, in other words, we think that when we walk in the room, it's dark, we flip on the light, and boom, the light comes up, and uh, you know, it has you know the angelic music, and this is it, and this is the change of my life. Um, but it doesn't happen. There's no on and off switch. Instead, um, really, before we even get, and why are we having this conversation a couple weeks before the new year? Um, we probably should have had it about a month ago, uh, maybe a month and a half ago. Um, because we have to, before we ever hit January 1, we already have to be start thinking about 2026. Um, think of it as a dimmer switch. So, what what happens when we turn a dimmer switch? If we turn it really slow, what happens? If it's off and we turn it really slow to on, what happens?
SPEAKER_01:Gradually it goes off.
SPEAKER_00:It gradually light comes on, or if it's on, it gradually goes off. So it it's a gradual, think of it as a dimmer switch. We go into the new year, we should have already started turning that dimmer switch to some light. And so, how do we do that? We start um mentally preparing that. So it's it's our word. Think about our word. Um uh many of you have already sent me your word, so you've already started um, you might say meditating. You might have already started thinking about that word, you've already started thinking, how's it how would that affect my 2026? What kind of difference is that gonna make? So you've already started turning your dimmer switch towards that 2026. You're not gonna wake up on January 1 and go, oh, this is my word, new year, new me. I'm gonna be hitting it. You've already started gearing yourself up to what kind of impact is that word gonna have on me in the next year. Um, so when we leave our old self in 2025, we're not um it's not like um, you know, you watch those movies and it's a kidnapper, and they take somebody out on a dirt road and just leave them. We can't take ourselves on a dirt road and just leave ourselves. Because we're gonna be like a dog. We got it, we're gonna keep coming back. We're gonna be stuck with us. So we have to start turning that dimmer switch a little bit at a time. Maybe it's with exercise, maybe it's with our thinking. Whatever that negative negative is pulling us down, what even if it's a person, place, or thing, we're slowly starting to turn that dimmer switch on. So as we go through the year, it's gonna get brighter and brighter and brighter. And as we leave 2025, maybe there's some, if we're trying to decide what do we need to leave, maybe there's some forgiveness you need to leave in 2025. You know how how do we do that? You know, we hear about and forgiveness is so important. It's so important. We hear that all the time, whether it's at church, whether it's in social media, whether it's family, friends, uh talking, forgiveness is is so important. But how do you forgive? What's the process? What's the process to forgiving?
SPEAKER_01:I'm not real sure because I'm not real good at it. It's very gradual. You've got to make an effort mentally to do it, and then you just have to keep doing it over and over and over. Because it doesn't, it doesn't just you can't flip that switch and make that change. You get it's a gradual process, could take years.
SPEAKER_00:Exactly. It is a gradual process, and just like Renee said, it starts with your thought, and then it goes back to how do you perceive it, how do you see it? And and when we start to, and typically when whenever something happened that that requires or you'd want to forgive, you may not be ready, but you want to. Typically, what happens at that at that moment that that thing happened to you? You might have got really sad or hurt, you might have got really mad. There's a lot of different emotions that happened with that. So what happens when it's six months later and you haven't forgiven and you think about that thing. What happens? What happens to you emotionally?
SPEAKER_01:If it makes me mad again, you get mad at it. All the same emotions, whether it was mad or sad.
SPEAKER_00:All the same emotions. You feel those all over again. Whether it's hate, whether it's anger, whether it's sadness, whatever it is, all of those things come flooding back. And the interesting thing about our brain is it doesn't know the difference. It doesn't know the difference from that thing happening right away at that very moment in real time versus your memory of it. And so when we go back to it, we're thinking about it, and it and all those emotions come flooding back. And then that will it cause us to have an action of crying or or throwing things or whatever it is. And it is that process of forgiveness comes, starts with in the mind. It's our perspective. How do we process it? And it could, like Renee said, it could take years sometimes to process through that. And as I mentioned in Walking Talk, there's an incident a couple of years ago that happened to me. And at that time, I was looking to do something new and with some others, and I was told at the time I had no value. And then for somebody to tell you that is pretty devastating to say you know how you have no value. And it took me well over a year to work through that. A month after, two months after, six months after. I mean, I was I was hot about it, really livid about it. And and it took me a while to process through that. I mean, I had to be real honest with myself and and talk through it. And you know what the interesting thing was is that when I was told that we had that conversation, I'm sure afterwards, they never thought about it again. And guess who kept giving it time over and over and over again? Me. And you know what happened when when I gave forgiveness? I didn't go and say, I didn't go to them and say, I forgive you. It's okay. I forgave them in my mind and my heart. And you know what happened is I freed up that space. The forgiveness wasn't for them. It wasn't for me to go to them and say, I forgive you. And they go, Oh, thank goodness, we've been so worried about it. They could care less. It was for me to be able to forgive and free up all that emotion, all that mental space, and let it go and move on. Um, and I can talk about it now and not have an emotion about it. It's not, it doesn't make me angry, it doesn't make me sad. It's just that is what it is. Um, and I can do that because but it took work. It took, like Renee said, it took intentionality to work through that process. I had to intentionally um think about the reasons why it upset me, why it made me mad, what what was their how did they think about it, what was their perspective and and and look from all sides. And through time, I could see all different sides, and and I became to understand, it's not that we had conversations over and over about it. It was all on me to be able to work through that process. And that forgiveness was for me to let go of those things. And sometimes I think sometimes we don't want to forgive because we don't want to let people off the hook. It's not letting them off the hook, it's give it's freeing up space for you. Um, forgiveness is really about you, and and when we hold on to that forgiveness, how can we expect anybody to ever forgive us if we can't forgive others and work through that process? But it is a process. Um, and and as we go into the new year, um, as we as I mentioned, as we go into the new year, um, and we want to go in the new year with arms open, palms open. Um, you know, body language and things like that. If um experts and all that say, um, if you're listening to a speaker and they're on stage or they're in front of you and they have arms open and palms up, you're more receptive to them because they're more welcoming. And if they were like this, you'd be a little more closed off. You may not think about it, but subconsciously you'd be more closed off, like they're not allowing me in. Uh, we're not accepting each other, but they come open hand, um, open arm, and it's more accepting. And that's how we kind of want to go into 2026. And if and if you think about um driving a car, we're we're driving a car forward. Um, what do we look out of when we're driving a car? Some of you are driving, what are you looking out of?
SPEAKER_01:The windshield windshield, windshield, windshield.
SPEAKER_00:The windshield is um, I see a couple people driving, but and and some of you don't have your camera on, so I can't see you. But you're driving, are you driving backwards looking through the rear view mirror?
SPEAKER_01:No, why you're going forward but looking back, right?
SPEAKER_00:And which which is the windshield bigger or the rear view mirror bigger? The windshield, windshield, the windshield, and so in driving a car, you think it makes no sense. You know, sometimes I go down, I forget something at home, and my mother-in-law lives about a tenth of a mile down the road before we get to the highway, and sometimes I forget what I need, so I'll I'll just stop at her house, instead of turn around or drive away, I'll just put it in reverse and go backwards. So, you know, we wouldn't do that. I mean, it's like tenth of a mile, it's not a big deal, but I wouldn't turn around and drive to town like that to live four miles from town. I wouldn't do that. But how many times do we leave the year before the season before, and we can't we can't see where we're going because we're too busy still looking in the rear view mirror. We're driving forward, but we're constantly looking in the rearview mirror, and that's what we do, but we would never do that in a car, we would never go more than just backing out or a tenth of a mile. But we look in that rear view mirror and we drive into a new year constantly all the time. So, you know, there's things in front of us, there's great things in front of us, greater than what is behind us. Do we need to recognize what is behind us and understand what is behind us? Yes, because it is so vital into who we are today, it is so important. We can't forget about it, but we can't do anything about those things in the past. So as we go into the new year, into 2026, and with open arms, open hands, looking through our front windshield, we can drive into healing and leave that hurt behind. We can drive into joy and leave that sadness behind. We can drive into that growth and leave pain behind us. We can go forward into the new experiences and leave that negativity behind us, we can go forward into the new year, the new season, looking for strength, leaving that weakness behind us, and we can you know go forward and look and be empowered and leave that so low self-confidence, low self-esteem behind us. Because if we're dragging it into the new year, we're constantly looking in the rearview mirror. And if you're driving forward looking in the rear view, rear view mirror, what's gonna eventually happen? If you're driving a car and you never take your eyes off the rearview mirror, what's gonna happen? You're gonna hit something, you're gonna hit something. You're gonna crash. And that crash can in a car, it can look all different ways. In life, it can look like anxiety, depression, dependency, all kinds of things. And those crashes happen because we're constantly looking in that little bitty rear view mirror that we can't get our eyes off of. But if we take our eyes off what's in the past, and know it's back there, and and we know that our house is back there, we know that where we came from is back there, but we're so excited to go to the new destination, so we look out the front window because we're so excited to get there. And so the fact the more excited we get, the more we can look out the window, we look around us, we can enjoy it. We go in with hands open, arms open, because there's some good things in 2025. But I'm gonna hold on to them really loose so that way I can get some more, I can receive more. And so that's the challenge. What what are you gonna let go in this in this year of 2025? Good or bad, that you want that you want to leave in 2025 and move into um something new in 2026. So that's just a challenge to think about it and think what are some things, and remember it's not an on-off switch, it's a dimmer switch, so it's not gonna happen overnight, it could take all year, but it's slowly gonna happen. And what happens when you crank on that dimmer switch all the way? The lights open, the lights bright, and you see the door that you're looking for to go through. Any thoughts, comments, or questions about what you're gonna leave behind this year?
SPEAKER_01:Well, not only do the emotion that all that affects the emotions, but it it also affects the body long term because it keeps your body in the fight or flight state all the time, which damages different organs, it can damage your thyroid, it can damage your your adrenals. I mean, all those things at some point that that anger, that constant anger, whatever it is, that emotion that uh unforgiveness leads to.
SPEAKER_00:Yes, and and and like I mean, like we mentioned, your body will crash in all different ways. It's different than a car, but it will it can total your body, or it can have little bitty dings and dents, and things will happen if they're if they're not maintained and taken care of. Any other thoughts, comments, or questions? And thank you to each of you for joining us on sit and talk. And I look forward to seeing you right here next time on sit and talk.