Healthy Huddle: The Weekend Food Identity

We map how our food identity flips on weekends and why “permission thinking” turns Friday into a slide that lasts through Sunday. We share small anchors that keep structure without killing the fun, so Monday feels strong, not like damage control.

• weekday structure shaped by early school schedules
• permission thinking and the “I earned it” mindset
• social mirroring and group cues to eat and drink more
• how late nights, missed meals, and low water spike cravings
• anchors like one seated meal, protein focus, and hydration
• pre-deciding treats to protect joy without drift
• keeping one meal time stable on weekends
• using Sunday as a bridge day into Monday
• balance over-perfection with intentional choices

https://aarondegler.com/

Transcript

Welcome And Purpose

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome to Healthy Huddle. If this is your first time each week, we just join our live call for Healthy Huddle as we talk about different food topics, really, from our identity with food, our decade of diets, all the different things we talk about to create a balanced lifestyle around food. We don't discuss diets, we don't, because those are temporary and we want a long-term solution. So we share a lot about balance and how do we do that from our different topics. So let's join our live call. We are going to talk about the weekend and how our identity shifts from weekday to weekend. Might even think of it as we could call it the Adam Sandler shift. So if you don't know if you ever watch Adam Sandler, if he's giving interviews and things like that, of course, like most people, he's dressed, looks normal, all those things. But there's all kinds of there's always clips of him being out and about in just basketball shorts, a t-shirt, kind of looking, you know, not all put together. I mean, I think sometimes that's maybe what we do on the weekend when it comes or the week or the weekday. But but we're gonna talk about maybe not how you dress, but maybe how you eat. You know, maybe it's all put together Monday through Friday-ish. And then come the weekend, you have an Adam Sandler shift. Maybe that does mean some bigger clothes because you ate a little bit more, a little bit fuller, need a little bit more room, but but probably the the eating is a little looser. In other words, it's not quite as scheduled, it's not quite as routined, maybe you have different things going on. So we tend to have that shift on the weekends. Sometimes, you know, we because why? Because the week's over, and what do we think? I deserve this meal, I deserve this drink. On the the weekend identity shift, too. I'm on a road trip. I deserve an energy drink. It's those things that we feel like we now have permission, as we talked about before, permission thinking, that now I can do this. And so if we're in a cycle of that, what happens on Friday? We feel like we have permission. And then Saturday we might feel the same. And then Sunday, well, it's just one more day, and then I'll get tightened back up on Monday. And then Monday we start, and it's almost like damage control from the weekend. The the things that we were gonna just do one time, and we did more than that. Um, so we're gonna talk about how do we um how do we kind of align the two and kind of bridge them together. So and it's kind of I mentioned during the week, we're probably more structured. Think about typically most people work during the week, so you're a little more productive. And you know, it's funny that think about how you're scheduled. Think about you go to work and you have a schedule. Think about when did you first start being scheduled? When in your life did you start first being scheduled? School. School, exactly. And when you were they told us when to eat. Well, exactly. So think about how how we're scheduled. That's not by accident. When you start, I mean, now I think pre-K is like four years old, and the most imprintable years are up to seven years old. So things that are imprinted on those are during those years are with you for life and take a lot of work to reverse those. So think about from kindergarten, first grade. You went in, you had to be there at a certain time, they told you what to do, when to do it. Lunches at 10:30, then you know, you have recess, all the different things. Then what typically happened after school? You got a snack on a schedule. So now, but but as we talk about structure, your structure really started when you were five years old going to school, and that was the structure. And so we get used to that during the week. And what happened, what happened on the weekends when you're in school? Do you have structure? Yes, no, no, not on the weekend.

SPEAKER_01 4:54

Well, I mean, when you were little, you did. You went by what your parents did.

SPEAKER_00 4:57

Yes, but was it as tight? In other words, you didn't have to, you you got to watch cartoons a little longer, you got to sleep a little bit later, you may had to go out and do chores, but probably nobody was at noon saying, Come in and eat, honey. They're gonna leave you out there to work to death in the sun.

SPEAKER_01 5:15

Just you can just I mean noon is eat time, I don't care. Where you're at.

SPEAKER_00 5:22

Wherever you're at.

SPEAKER_01 5:23

My whole life.

Social Mirroring And Overeating

SPEAKER_00 5:25

So, so really how we are during the week, I think a majority of people, is really because of that was ingrained in us at a young age. And and then during the week, too, maybe we're goal-oriented. We want to do so many classes, we want to eat, you know, hit our macros, or eat calories, or log our food, all those different things. So it's definitely a little more structured because so then what does that do to our brain? It kind of tires us out, it kind of makes our brain a little tired because there's something else we have to keep track of. So on the weekend, our brain shifts to, ah, I'm gonna relax, or I'm gonna reward myself, or we're gonna be more social. We're gonna go out and see friends and talk to friends, and so then on and you know, on the weekend we're more spontaneous. In other words, maybe a lunch isn't planned. You're just gonna go, oh, what do I want to eat today? Because that way I don't have to think about it ahead of time. I can just choose what I want when I want it. So, really, our our internal dialogue changes from during the week when we say, I'm focused, I'm focused on my food, I'm focused on my exercise, I'm focused on work, I'm focused on all these things, to the weekend comes and we say, I deserve this. I deserve to not have to track everything, I deserve to just have a few things that I've been wanting all week. And and so again, that Friday, how many, you know, how many times do you hear, thank goodness it's Friday? When Friday rolls around, if you talk to people, how are you doing? Oh, thank goodness it's Friday. So why would they say that?

SPEAKER_01 7:16

Because the weekend's here.

SPEAKER_00 7:18

The weekend's here. They've been looking forward to it, and you might do the same. You might go, thank goodness it's Friday. Because typically that means that we're gonna get some sort of reprieve over the weekend.

SPEAKER_01 7:29

More fun.

Lost Structure And Monday Fallout

Practical Anchors For Weekends

SPEAKER_00 7:30

More fun. Do you ever find yourself saying, Whew, thank goodness it's Tuesday? Wow, probably not, because there is there anything special about a Tuesday necessarily? Or probably you don't even find yourself going, Whew, thank goodness it's Monday. Because a lot of times we go, oh, it's Monday. I gotta, I gotta put more work in again. I gotta start all this again. So Friday rolls around just like our brain thinks, oh, thank goodness, thank goodness it's Friday. Means time off from work, there's not as structured, maybe you're doing more fun things on the weekend. So it switches to what again, what we talk about is permission thinking. It and and so we tell ourselves it's been a long week, I'll have a drink, I'll have some dessert, I'll have some ice cream, and then we give that our permission thinking saying, I'll reset on Monday. And or we say it's just the weekend. Or this is a really good one, says, Oh, I've earned it. I've earned it, I've worked hard. Kind of like really what we feel about a weekend sometimes. I work really hard. I I earned the weekend, I earned the time off. So then when we what happens when we give ourselves permission, our guard towards those things start to drop. It's not as strong. So sometimes it's not that we're hungry, sometimes we're in celebration mode. We're excited that it's the weekend, so we want to celebrate. And then if we are social, then that amplifies everything. So, in other words, when we're we're going out to eat with friends, we're gonna eat more because we talked about how we how we mirror each other, we're gonna eat more. Maybe we're gonna drink more, maybe we're gonna have more snacks. Again, because we're around people, we're talking, we're we're laughing, we're having a good time, so we're gonna eat more. Just because everybody else is. Um again, because it's because we're wanting to belong to the group. It's part of human nature. If there's a group, um we want to belong to it. Uh I I kind of thought this is gonna be off healthy huddle stuff, but it it really talks about when we're around others, we'll do things. I've I found this very interesting, and that Rick last night they had a children's program at the community center for all the churches for their kids to join. And they were they were having praise music, and the kids were raising their hands, raising their arms up and and worshiping. And I thought, and I and I thought about human mirroring and unconsciously, because it was interesting because I thought since some of them were raising their hand their arms, unconsciously, it gave others permission to go, oh, it's okay to do that. And so they did it as well. And I thought that was really interesting, really powerful, and I and I thought I'd love to see who the first kiddos were that raised their arms, and then to see the rest of them follow. Because then my my other thought is again, off topic, but I thought it was interesting. My other thought was where do we lose that as we become adults? Where do we lose that? You know, because sometimes that's it's okay, and I'm not gonna worry about others think. And where do we lose that when we go, oh, they're doing it, but I don't want I don't know if I want to do it. And I think that goes with all kinds of things when it talks, when we when we unconsciously mirror behavior, we're still thinking, is it safe in this environment to do that? But I thought but I find that was very interesting, and and those kiddos don't even know what they're doing. Um in regards to that, in regards to the unconscious mirroring, and there are signals there unconsciously that said it's okay to do this in this space. And that is really what we do when we go out with others. If somebody else is doing it, unconsciously our brain says, Oh, it's okay to do that in this space around these people. So we do it because we're always looking for conscious or unconscious, we're looking for some sort of acceptance that we can belong to part of the group, whatever group that is, wherever we're at in that group. So then when we when we are on the weekend, why does it feel like the spiraling sometimes of the weekend feels so big come Monday? It's because we really a lot of times don't have structure. So we skip structure that we have during the week. We might uh skip drinking as much, we might skip prior prioritizing some healthier carb options or getting in enough protein. And we might stay up a little bit later on the weekends, uh, we might sleep a little bit later, so everything's kind of a different timing because think about why do most of you get up in the morning at the time you do? To go work out, to go work out because it's a schedule, and chances are that might be a little bit different during the week. I mean, on the weekend, you might get up a little earlier, you might get up later, but it's still different than what you've done five days a week. So then by by Sunday, when all that is kind of changed, then we start to our hunger hormones are a little bit elevated because our eating has been off. You know, our inflammation is higher, probably because we've eaten some different foods, and then our cravings are louder, probably because we partook of some things, and and sugar, sugar. It's gonna make us want more. And so if we took more of that stuff, then we're gonna want it. So we go, oh, I have to start Monday again, resetting, trying to not want those things for the next few days. And by the time it finally goes away, come Thursday, then on Friday you go, Whew, thank goodness it's Friday. And we have permission thinking again. Then what does Monday feel like? Have you ever come to a treadmill class on a Monday and felt your whole weekend as you were trying to run or walk up a hill?

SPEAKER_01 13:45

Especially when the instructor says we're running today and we need to ease into it from the weekend.

SPEAKER_00 13:50

Yeah, you're like, I'm not I'm not quite ready for some sprints on a Monday because I feel like way, way larger than I was on Friday. I was fit on Friday, and Monday maybe fit-ish.

SPEAKER_01 14:06

Fit-ish.

Pre-Deciding Treats And Meals

SPEAKER_00 14:07

Fit-ish. And so a lot of times Mondays feel like that is because it's it's kind of punishment that oh, I gotta start all over again, I gotta get back in the swing of things. And and so, really, how do we bridge those two? It's not really to get rid of the weekend you, because we need balance, and that's what we always talk about. So, how do we integrate the two? And on the weekend we just have some things that kind of anchor us. Maybe it's you sit down to eat, maybe it's a meal that you sit down to eat and actually think about. Maybe it's you add in more protein, maybe it's in breakfast or lunch, somewhere that you're typically missing it out that you normally have it, then you add it back in. Maybe it's trying to focus more on your hydration, in other words, I'm gonna have it, may not even be a thought during the week. Um, but for me that's different. On the weekend, I typically drink less than I do during the week. Um water. Right, water. Yes, I drink water, I don't drink anything else, but I typically have less water on the weekends than I do during the week. Not that I drink anything else on the weekend, it's just because I'm not thinking about as much. Um, because I'm doing other stuff, so it's not on my mind on a regular basis. And so, and then we can also decide in advance. In other words, if we know before before Friday, decide in advance. In other words, what are we gonna have? What's maybe we've got a few different things to do over the weekend, and we're gonna be eating out. What's the highlight? You know, and uh what treat is worth that? Um the last three weekends, Kim and I did not pre-decide because we pre-decided. Well, yes, we we we pre-decided to have ice cream um and and and not skip.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

It was a decision that was made.

SPEAKER_00 16:11

Yes. This past weekend we went out to eat Mexican food and had fajitas and then went and got ice cream. Now, if I predecided properly, because usually when it comes to that kind of when it comes to the ordering food, it's me saying I'm really hungry. And and it's not really Kim saying we need more food, because it's really me saying I want more and I don't want you to eat all my food.

SPEAKER_01 16:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 16:33

Even though she's not not eating that much. I don't want her eat my food. So we'll order more sometimes, and we did Saturday night, but then we still, I mean, I knew we were like leaving the restaurant and then going to get ice cream, and I still didn't pre-decide that you can eat a little less there, fella.

SPEAKER_01 16:52

You don't have to have fajitas for two.

Keep Mealtimes Stable

Make Sunday A Bridge Day

Balance Over Perfection And Closing

SPEAKER_00 16:54

Yeah, we could share the one and it'd be okay. Um, but again, um I always think I don't want to walk away hungry. It's just my thought process. So, as we talked about default settings, that's one of those that I that I continually try to work on and and and have to battle with resetting. So we pre-decide before Friday what is our weekend gonna look like? What do we want the outcome to be of our weekend? Um, and then if you can um keep your meal time stable. Uh maybe your structure weekend is different than your week. But maybe you can have the same weekend structure. In other words, you eat the same time, um, whether it's a lunch, whether it's a breakfast, maybe there's an anchor somewhere in there that's it's the same. So that way that that kind of helps from not skipping. So one of the things that that typically I do in the summertime is on Saturdays I don't eat lunch because I'm outside usually mowing, doing stuff, and I'm not gonna come in all dirty and nasty just to eat lunch. So, like during the summer, on Saturdays, I'll typically come in and then be mid-afternoon, I'll have a little snack, take a nap, and then eat supper. So that's definitely my weekend schedule. Um, now on the weekends, during the winter, I don't have to not out mowing, but still keep it pretty much on the same schedule. Eat breakfast at the same time, eat lunch, as Kim said, it's around noon. Um, if it's later than that, are we not eating today or what? Um it can be 12:15. So we're I guess we're not eating today, right? And um she can get kind of um hangry really quick. So maybe we keep times meal time stable. And then think of Sunday as really not, I'm gonna extend it into Sunday. Maybe it is a bridge day where you start to tighten things up a little bit, where you're really focusing on hydration, you're you're focusing on your rest, on your meal times, on what you're eating, on what you need to get ready for Monday. So that way when you come in Monday and it's time for some sprints or a workout, you feel really strong, or you don't feel like everything from the weekend is swaying side to side as you run. And you feel like it's so much harder to run today than it was two days ago. I must have lost my fitness. But it doesn't happen like that, but we just feel like that. So, so really the the challenge is is there somewhere that you can kind of tighten up your weekend? In other words, so there's some things in it that look similar to the week. So it kind of can keep you on track. And really, it's not keeping it totally separate, it's just kind of bridging, bridging them together. So there's some similarities. Um, again, because we talk about balance. Are there your weekend should be similar to your week, your week should be similar to your weekend. So then there's really no distinction when it comes to food, it's just gonna kind of ebb and flow and kind of look the same. So that way on Monday rolls around, you don't feel like it I have to punish myself because the weekend. And so again, it's really about balance and it's about the freedom that we have because it's intentional. Um, everything the weekend rolls around, and we're just being intentional about it. We're thinking about it. It doesn't mean it's gonna be perfect, it just means that we're gonna be thinking about it more and how do we kind of align the two so there's not a distinct, thank goodness it's Friday. It's just another day that maybe we do things a little bit differently, but we still have a schedule, a plan, we'll be intentional with that. Any any thoughts, comments, or questions about our weekend food identity as we go into the weekend? It'll just give you food for thought this weekend. Thanks for the laugh. If you have any questions, comments, or thoughts, just let me know, and I'll see everybody today or tomorrow. Thank y'all. And thank you to each of you for joining me on today's Healthy Huddle. Look forward to seeing you right here next time on Healthy Huddle.