MM Ep 46: What if "Not A Big Deal" is the Problem?

A scattered dumbbell rack at the gym turns into a clear lesson about how small choices quietly change our lives over time. We explore how “not a big deal” decisions snowball into stress and disorder, and how intention brings us back to the life we actually want.

• a gym dumbbell rack as a picture of habit drift
• how one small misplaced choice creates a chain reaction
• why “the job got done” can still mean losing standards
• the one touch rule and how it applies beyond the home
• using yes and no to prevent overextending ourselves
• being intentional with thoughts actions and behaviors to build a joyful organized life

Are you being intentional about your thoughts, your actions, and your behaviors?

https://aarondegler.com/

Transcript

Welcome And A Gym Story<br>

SPEAKER_00 0:00

Welcome back to Mindful Moment. Thank you for taking in a moment to join me. This past week at the gym, an interesting thing happened. We had this exercise or this group of exercises that was using dumbbells. And so I put the exercise, the group of exercises, right next to the dumbbell rack. So that way they could get their dumbbells that they needed. They didn't have to basically, so I didn't have to take all the dumbbells off the rack, move them two feet in front of the rack so they could pick them up. So I just put the exercise there so they could turn around, get off the rack, and get what they need and then put it back. And so as I showed the exercise, I said, hey, when you get the ex after you're done with the dumbbell, just put them back. And so, of course, before we started class, they're all nice and neat. Um, they all have a different certain order. I kind of stack them the same way every time I put all the equipment up, stack them the same way. It's just kind of the habit that I have. And so we went through a couple classes, and after we were done a couple classes, I noticed that the weights were kind of scattered out on the rack, scattered out, somewhere on top, somewhere on bottom. And the interesting thing, majority of the weights were put back where they didn't get them. It's not where they went. And so as I thought about that, I thought that was pretty interesting. We were, as we went through the classes, you know, they the first group, the first class, started out with the weights where they were in the proper places. And then as we progressed through the classes, they started to move and get in different places. And I thought about that and I thought, isn't that interesting? That, and I think that's how it happens a lot of times, is things are in one place, or they're that's the way things go or the way they are. And over time, one person moves a weight, probably where it wasn't supposed to go. And so then the person that their weights went there didn't know what to do with it. So they just put it somewhere else. And so, and that kind of snowballed into the weights being spread out all in different places. And I think that's sometimes what happens to us is we want to keep all this night, nice, neat thing. Maybe it's in the world, maybe it's in our workplace, maybe it's in our home. And it doesn't get it's it we let it slip a little bit. It changes just a little bit. It's not a big deal. The weight still got put up, it's not a big deal, the thing still got done, the job still got done, but it wasn't really the way it was meant to be done. It wasn't the way it was meant to be said, but we just let it go. And and as that continues over time, kind of like when I came back to the weights and looked at them and went, wow, this is a mess. We did there was no numerical order. Some weights were on stacked of each stacked on top of each other, which wasn't correct. All the different things. And I didn't, you know, it'd be like me coming in in that morning going, what happened? This is a total mess. Last night I left and it was totally fine. It was all organized. But as I saw the progression of classes, I saw how it changed. I allowed it, I let it happen because I wanted to see what it would look like at the end of classes. I wanted to use it as a little experiment. And the same thing is true with us, if we're not careful, if we're not aware, those little things that we well, I'll put this here. Or it's not a big deal if I say this. Or if I put something less important in place of something that's more important. And over time, that begins to change us. That begins to change our life. And sometimes, kind of like that dumbbell rack, I looked at and goes, that's kind of messy. Sometimes we allow those things a little at a time and we look at our life and go, wow, this is kind of messy. How'd this happen? And happened by letting one person ask, you know, saying yes to one person that you probably should have said no to, or overextending yourself, or allowing one behavior to go, or some words to be said. And over time, we begin to have that messy look. So in our house, we have a one-touch rule. So if you get it, then you grab it and you put it back where you got it. So you're not sitting in one place, picking it up again. And so, how would that look in our life? Is you know, is this what I want it to look like? I'm gonna, you know, if I say this thing or if I do this thing or if I say yes, is it a direction I want my life to go? Is it a way I want it to look organized? Because without paying attention, we can have a very unorganized, messy life. So really the challenge is are you, just as simple as the weights, are you putting things back where you got them? And the thing is, other people came along and put it back where they had gotten it, but it already kept messing up. And so it kind of snowballs. So if we kind of start over, where does this need to go? We organize it and we make sure every time we're saying the words we want to say, we're doing the actions we want to do, we're having the thoughts we want to have. And when we are intentional about all of those things, we start to see a more organized, more life we desire. So that's the challenge. Are you being intentional about your thoughts, your actions, and your behaviors? And over time, they will create the organized, satisfied, joyful life you're looking for. Thank you for joining me on this week's Mindful Moment. I look forward to seeing you right here next time on a Mindful Moment.