How to Lead When Criticism Gets Personal [EP:229]

Criticism is one of the hardest parts of leadership that nobody really prepares you for. It’s one thing to build systems, run a business, or make decisions. It’s another thing entirely to stay grounded when people question you, misunderstand you, or speak about your work in ways that feel personal and painful.

In this episode, we talk about what it actually feels like to be criticized when you’re building something meaningful. We break down why criticism shows up more when you grow, why it often says more about the person speaking than the person building, and how easy it is to start shrinking when the noise gets loud.

We also talk about protecting your energy, resisting the urge to explain yourself to everyone, and learning to let your work speak louder than your reactions.

Leadership isn’t about being liked. It’s about being steady. 

And sometimes the strongest thing you can do is keep building quietly, even when it hurts.

Your business should serve you, so that you can serve others. And your leadership should be strong enough to stand when the noise tries to shake it.

Key Takeaways

• Criticism usually shows up when you’re becoming visible or growing.
• Nobody who is building more than you is trying to tear you down.
• Shrinking to avoid pain is more dangerous than standing through it.
• Leadership isn’t about approval; it’s about steadiness.
• The hive mindset feeds on insecurity and fear.
• Copying is often a way to avoid responsibility.
• You don’t need to explain yourself to people committed to misunderstanding you.
• Protecting your energy is part of leadership.
• Let your work be louder than your reactions.
• Growth requires emotional strength, not just skill.

Time Stamps

00:00 — Why criticism hurts more than people admit
 02:00 — Jen’s opening take: protecting health and energy
 05:00 — Todd’s opening take: partnerships are 100/100
 09:00 — Why criticism shows up when you grow
 12:00 — “Nobody doing more than you is attacking you”
 14:00 — The hive mindset and piling on
 17:00 — Envy, fear, and scarcity thinking
 20:00 — Why copying feels safer than leading
 23:00 — Shrinking vs standing firm
 26:00 — Why leaders don’t explain themselves online
 29:00 — Anchoring to your values
 32:00 — Protecting your energy and choosing your rooms
 35:00 — Mental health and processing pain
 38:00 — Letting your work speak
 41:00 — Final thoughts: build anyway

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