REality

Relationship Building in the Digital Age: Authenticity Meets Strategy

• Gary Scott

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What truly drives success in real estate? It's not just market knowledge or sales techniques—it's finding your joy and purpose that creates the foundation for everything else.

Carissa Tucker, branch leader at Allen Tate Realtors, takes us on her remarkable journey from social media marketer to leadership, revealing the moment she discovered her true calling. "When I saw an agent running down the hallway after hitting her goal, I realized that's where my joy came from—changing her life, her family's lives, and all the people she helped," Carissa shares with genuine emotion.

The power of mentorship shines through as Carissa credits her mentor Becky Hanley for wisdom that transcended business advice. One guiding principle—"Keep it simple, stupid" (KISS)—has become her north star in approaching everything from negotiations to hiring decisions. This simplicity proves especially valuable in navigating today's noisy real estate landscape.

Beyond professional strategies, Carissa reveals how her family serves as her fundamental "why"—the reason she puts "two feet on the ground every day." This clarity of purpose creates a ripple effect, making professional goals and methods more apparent. When family comes first, everything else improves.

The conversation explores a brilliant blend of high-tech and high-touch approaches to real estate success. While embracing social media and AI tools, Carissa advocates for maintaining authentic connections through personalized communication. Her innovative strategy of writing handwritten notes based on social media insights perfectly bridges digital efficiency with genuine relationship building.

Whether you're a seasoned agent or new to the industry, this episode delivers actionable wisdom on finding your joy, leveraging mentorship, clarifying your purpose, and creating meaningful connections that stand the test of time. Tune in to discover how these foundational elements can help you build a resilient career regardless of market conditions.

Speaker 1:

This is the reality podcast and I'm your host, gary Scott. With more than 35 years of experience in the real estate industry, working in 10 major markets from New Jersey to South Carolina and now as the president of the largest real estate company in the Carolinas, allentate Realtors, I know what it takes to be successful in this business. This is real life in real time, sharing real experiences of industry professionals to help both new and seasoned agents achieve their goals and realize their maximum potential. Allentate Realtors is a proud partner of Howard Hanna Real Estate Services, the largest independent, family-owned real estate company in the country, with more than 13,000 sales associates and staff members across the combined companies. You'll have the opportunity to hear from the absolute best in the business. Hear from the absolute best in the business. Join me each episode as we unpack the reality behind what it takes to make it in this great business. Welcome to Reality Podcast. I am your host, gary Scott, and I'm excited today to have as a very special guest Carissa Tucker.

Speaker 2:

Carissa. How are you? I'm doing wonderful. How are you?

Speaker 1:

I am good. One of my favorite things to begin the podcast is I want to let everybody know that it is late on a Friday afternoon. I'm actually going to share the date, june 27, which makes this the late Friday afternoon to share some of your experience, your background, your wisdom and your success with our listeners. And, as always, I like to thank our listeners, because if there are no listeners, there is no reality podcast. So, carissa, it's great to see you. Let me start with a little bit of an icebreaker. All right, let's tell everybody a little bit about your background. I'm going to start. How long have you been in the real estate business?

Speaker 2:

So the real estate business about a decade, practicing real estate, different About five years. So I started as an unlicensed admin doing marketing for social media. That then led into more, of course, right Then I found myself working as an administrative manager for Becky Hanley and then, from there, within a year, I got my license, working with her because she inspired me, right, I think, when you have a mentor that inspires you to do great things. It propelled me and she gave me the confidence to do that and from there I decided I found my joy, and my joy was helping agents, and so I became the director of business growth and agent development. And then I found my way over to Alan Tate in November of 23 as a branch leader, where I've been able to really live my joy and experience even more Right. So that's me in a nutshell of real estate.

Speaker 1:

So you know, there, there's three things in that.

Speaker 1:

I always like to take a segment and, in my own way, dissect it, and so I'm going to start with what I found most interesting, which was I started a decade ago, and one of your roles a decade ago was helping people with social media. Yet I'm going to believe that there are some listeners, and maybe even the host of the podcast, that I was not thinking. I was not thinking about social media in 2015. So I think that's interesting as we think about the evolution of social media. We're going to talk a little bit later about reels, and you know all the ways you have leveraged it in your role, all the ways you have leveraged it in your role. I think that the second thing that really, really resonates with me and I want to expand on it a little bit was your value for your mentor. Yes, and so I have this fundamental philosophy that I call multiple mentors matter, and I think that, as we grow professionally, the more mentors in our lives we have, the more value from their wisdom and their experiences.

Speaker 2:

So you came right out of the gate to talk about Becky Becky, yes, so what made her or makes her such an invaluable part of your team from a mentor perspective that I have Becky sitting on my shoulder and I can hear her and the words of wisdom that she passed down to me from her years of experience. It could have been life experiences, because she may not, she may not have always just been mentoring me in real estate. Sometimes it was mentoring me as a mom, mentoring me as a wife, and she really helped me discover who I was and who I could be, and that's a special person.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, Gosh, I love that. You know, I think mentors are such an important part of leadership and growth and success. So you made a statement and I'm just going to. I'm going to clarify that. He's on your shoulder and you can hear her words. Mentors use phrases or words. That those are the words, or is it just the? I'll call it the accumulation of wisdom? Were there any phrases or specifics that Becky shared with you that, like you're sitting in here in this moment and something's happening and you can hear her say X, Y and Z, Are there really words or is it a series of words?

Speaker 2:

So there's one and a lot of people have heard it. It's called kiss. Keep it simple, stupid. And there are days where I pause and I hear Becky and we kiss it and that's what makes sometimes the best. Could be a negotiation, it could be a hiring we so many different aspects but kiss.

Speaker 1:

I think the other piece of that that you just mentioned that I think is really important, particularly when I think, like today, in our industry and in the world, quite frankly, there's a lot of noise, there's just a lot of noise, and you know I love it. Keep it simple, stupid. You know, there's a tendency for all of us to complicate the simple, where you know, I think what we have to do is simplify the complicated. But I think the other thing that you mentioned is like the important essence of pause Take a deep breath. And so I think Becky and you, she taught you not only kiss it, but the art of the pause as you get caught up in the noise. Take a deep breath.

Speaker 1:

You know, count to 10 or five, or 15, or, as I had to do the other day, I said to somebody I'm going to count to 10, 10 times. Obviously it was a very fiery moment, but uh, and then, and then the third piece of segment one, Teresa, that really strikes me and I want you to expand on it. I found my joy. Yes, what does that mean? I found my joy.

Speaker 2:

I found my joy. Well, most of us have to work Right, um. Well, most of us have to work right Um. We have to pay our bills, we have to eat.

Speaker 2:

But when you wake up in the morning, are you really electrified about putting your two feet on the ground and doing the good things that you're going to do that day? And there was a moment in my career and there was a particular agent that her and I were just friends and she came to me and we were just talking about goals and she really wanted to hit this one goal and it was to be in the top 3% of agents, and she there was a certain number behind that goal that came with that, of course, and so I said let's write it on a sticky note, just put it on a sticky note, let's put it in front of you every single day. And then we talked about some of the actions, right, that you need to do, obviously, to get there, and along the way, we would talk about the things that she was doing. But the day that she hit that goal the noise that came from her and the running down the hallway to my office because we happened to work in the same firm at the time. It still to this day I can hear it, I still get goosebumps.

Speaker 2:

And that is when I realized that, no matter how many cartwheels I saw a little girl make in a living room because her grandmother was moving from Ohio, no matter how many times you know you got this house sold. The impact that I made on her life that day and I was able to change her life, change her family's lives and all the people that she also helped. I realized that's where my joy came from and that's what I wanted to get up every single day and do. And then that's what led me to want to become a broker in charge and a branch leader to be want to become a broker in charge and a branch leader.

Speaker 1:

So that's where it comes from. Yeah, joy, the other. You see me taking a note, electrified, electrifying. So a couple of couple of things. That that I think about number one. A great great response. That I think about number one, a great great response.

Speaker 1:

You know, I think that you know my, my father had been in the real estate business 40 years and you know what I shared with a group yesterday, carissa. The very first question he would ask in an interview would be can you live vicariously through the success of others? And I'm going to tell you, you just, you know my dad is, is watching right, and I just know that he's listening to you saying she said it better than I did, she said it better than I did. Like you gave the story of his question. And while I can see you during this interview, our listeners will not be able to see you during this interview.

Speaker 1:

If I could have described, which I'm about to, the look on your face when you described her running down the hall. It's about impact and influence. So I congratulate you on that and I also congratulate you on allowing the journey to come to you to determine how I can turn my passion into something really meaningful and really significant. So, before I get into some specifics of the real estate business, I interested in our, in our guests and again, thanks for being with us. It's, it's a real treat.

Speaker 2:

Thank you very much.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, no, you. It's been a thrill having you on our team. It's great to be your teammate. I know the other. You've got passion for our business. Be your teammate. I know the other. You've got passion for our business. You've got passion for helping others. I'm pretty confident that you've got passion for your family. So, you know, let's just take a minute and let's just share about that passion, before we get into things like social media and how do we price right in today's market to what you think the future holds in store for us. But let's talk about your family, because I know they're so important to you. I watch you on social media and I know they all make you so proud. So just share with our listener. Tell us about your family.

Speaker 2:

Well, we'll start with my husband, chris. Right, we've been married for 20 years and we're you know the iconic high school love story, so that's you know. Many people kind of laugh about that, but we are and he's my partner, he's my best friend, he's my rock. He's the only reason I can do the things that I do, because today he's with our 14-year-old daughter at High Point University attending a volleyball camp because she is a club volleyball player. That keeps us very busy and she'll be doing all the things during this summer to prepare for, hopefully, her high school level volleyball and then another club season along the way.

Speaker 2:

So Allie will be a freshman and then Haven, my 18 year old, she is my joy and you know when I, when I talk about my daughters, they are the reason I get up every day, right, they are the reason I put my two feet on the ground to make the world a better place, so that it is a better place for them. And Haven is going to be going to High Point next year as a freshman and she keeps me busy with her varsity dance. And she was a Girl Scout for 12 years and I was her Girl Scout leader, and so we definitely had a lot of experiences and adventures together through Girl Scouts but, yes, they are the light of my day and sometimes, as we all know, with two teenage girls sometimes maybe not they definitely keep me on my toes.

Speaker 1:

I'll have to give you the T-shirt I have that says I survived my teenage daughter, and so you know I wear that proudly, albeit that would have been 25 years ago, and I made it. I made it through the eye of the storm with Lauren, but I say that with love and joy as well. I think it's important that I share this with our listeners. When you and I had a chance to interview I remember it very well I had an incredibly engaging conversation and you know, one of the things about, I think, successful organizations whether it's a company, whether it's a sports team, whether it's a branch office, whether it's a region is, you know, culture is such an important thing and you know, every time I turn to a company or to a sports team, everybody's talking about culture. And you know, one of the real values of our company is our family culture. Yes, we're proud to be family owned, but I think we're equally or more proud to have a culture of family, which is a culture of abundance and not scarcity. And one of the things that really inspired me and one of my notes as I looked back on our interview, was how you lit up, just like you just did, in talking about your family and, and what I know is, when we put family first, everything else gets better. And you are, and you said that they are your why. And you know, I would encourage all of our listeners you know, I think you know, as you go to seminars around the country, to learn how to. You know, stay focused and draw your business plan.

Speaker 1:

What's your why? What's your why? What's your why? And, boy, when you have clarity of your why, you can get out. As you said, I put my two feet on the floor every day and my why is so crystal clear that my what, when and how becomes clear as well. So move real quick. I'm going to ask about hobbies and then I am going to go a little off script. I'm going to ask about the picture above your head. But, hobbies, what do you enjoy doing outside of helping, electrifying those that you lead and your family? What else does Carissa love to do in life?

Speaker 2:

Well, I was going to say my hobbies right now are having two teenage daughters that are living their best life ever as club volleyball players and varsity dancers that are going to Orlando and Myrtle Beach and Virginia Beach. I've never traveled more in my life than since I signed my children up for club sports. So if you don't have a hobby, just sign your children up for those things. But no, outside of that, I actually enjoy archery. So that's definitely something that most people don't know is that I actually am an archery trainer and I've been certified through Girl Scouts to do that and to lead my Girl Scouts in our archery adventures. I am an avid camper, uh, and and real camping we're not talking about glamping, so we're going to get out of the tents, we're going to build the campfire and we're going to live without electricity for a couple of days and it'll be okay. And then hiking. So I'm. I definitely love the outdoors, but, you know, if I can get myself into nature, especially in the mountains, I feel at peace.

Speaker 1:

Well, I did not know about archery. I'm just going to go on the record to our listener that my definition of camping is typically a Westin or a camping. Camping is typically a Westin or a Kemp. That would be my that's. That's, that is my glamping. But it's funny. I've talked to three or four people recently who love the camping you love and, you know, maybe someday I might love it, but I'm just scared to death to try it. So, all right, before we talk about social media, I'm going to give her a little preamble to our next topic. There's a picture above her head. I'm pretty sure I know what it is. I want to know why it is. Tell us about your picture above your head.

Speaker 2:

So my Highland cow, my husband and I enjoy the Highlands of North Carolina and there's a very special place there called Fire Mountain that we enjoy and you can find yourself getting lost in Fire Mountain and just taking a hike and the next thing we knew we may have hiked around and when you're in the mountains there's times where barbed wire fencing may have gotten trampled down because of cows and we did not realize that we were standing in the middle of a cattle farm until a highland cow greeted me. We're basically face to face and they are very gentle by the and, but they're enormous, absolutely enormous. And so when I found the picture, I was just shopping one day and I found it and I said that reminded me of a very happy moment between my husband and I and the Highland cow in the middle of the Highlands of North Carolina, and that's why it's in my office.

Speaker 1:

Well, thank you for sharing that Another thing that I have learned today. So, for our consistent listeners, they will tell you that I have never spent 20 minutes with an interview, asking as many questions that don't have to do with real estate. And I did this with great intentionality and I'm going to share the why. And with that, I think, comes the singular, most important lesson nugget that I want everybody to take from our session today. Now you'll give 10 more, but you and I were in a conversation the other day about the interview process, the relationship building process, with what I'm trying to attract, someone who doesn't currently work for us, and you made a statement to me that said I just hired an agent, and it came down to you know where I'm going. It came down to the fact that we had something really interesting in common crochet. Am I getting the story right?

Speaker 2:

Crocheting.

Speaker 1:

Crocheting and my. What struck me which is why, as I thought about our episode today and spending a little bit more time on asking questions, asking follow up questions a little more curious is we are in the relationship building business and that I think that, with the technology that's out there, social media that's out there and the change that is out there, we need it more than ever. And so what I would ask everyone to take away before we get into some of the meat of our session is just think about interacting with a seller, think about interacting with a buyer. If you're a leader and you're out trying to attract, just get to know somebody.

Speaker 1:

Now, I don't have a Now. The thing we have in common is I spent years with travel teams. I could talk to you about tennis and lacrosse and baseball and then I would sit here and tell you enjoy every minute of it, because you're going to wake up and they're going to be 33 and 35. And you're going to ask for a weekend away at volleyball club and in the moment, man, it's frantic. So I love that comment. When you and I had the conversation the other day, she joined me because we connected about crocheting Like think about building relationships that are meaningful, longstanding, impactful, consistent.

Speaker 2:

Yes.

Speaker 1:

All right. So, thank you, you have, uh, you've inspired me this week. You and I have talked to each other more in the last week than than we might have since you've joined us, and it has been a treat. All right. So I am going to go back to a decade ago when, uh, we learned that Carissa was helping others with social media. I believe that that stayed with her. So, talk a little bit about social media and why you think it's important and what pieces of it. What advice, what advice do you have? Is there anything you say, hey, stay away from this. Let's. Let's share with our listeners social media to grow my business. Let's share with our listeners social media to grow my business.

Speaker 2:

Well, gary, you and I were around when there were yellow pages, right, and my Nana was a broker. She owned her own firm. She had a page ad in the yellow pages. Your father probably had a page or two ads in the newspaper as well, right? Well, those went away.

Speaker 2:

And then social media came along and, because of Facebook and Instagram and LinkedIn, we now have a category of people that are on that specific platform. Right, we know that there's different age groups that like Instagram. We know that there's different age groups that like Instagram. We know that there's different age groups that like Facebook, and we know that there's professionals and investors that we can find on LinkedIn. We now have sources like Google, my Business, we have TikTok and there's so many others like X. My biggest thing is make sure you pick one and get good at it, don't try to do them all, right. And so when I first started in social media luckily there wasn't all of those we really just had Facebook. Instagram was really just where people were posting a picture or two every once in a while, and LinkedIn is where you went and found a job.

Speaker 2:

Now, obviously, there's been a lot of evolution in social media, but when it first started. For me it was this is my advertising space, this is my new yellow pages, Right. And so from there I helped businesses meet their people prospect, having people find them rather than trying to find clients. And so when you can tell a story on social media, when you can make someone think, I was just thinking that how is she in my head? You have connected to the right people.

Speaker 2:

And so I used to do a exercise with everyone and I made them make an avatar. So they have a client avatar and they have to have an age group, they have to have an income, they have to be male or female, they have to have hobbies. I need to know what type of education they have. We're making a person. You're even going to give them a name and you're going to give them a face, and when you make your post, you're going to ask yourself would they want to read it? Would they find it interesting? Because if you can capture just a few people, just a few people that's better than capturing none. So that's how I started in social media and from there it's evolved for me because of the trainings that I'll continue to participate in. So today I had a social media business strategist and content strategist in my office leading a meeting and we helped 20 agents with those exact questions and we were able to shoot a 30-second reel. We were able to do edits on them and they all got them posted out today.

Speaker 1:

How many of those 20 was that their first posted reel?

Speaker 2:

About 18 of them.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and my guess is that if you had pulled them yesterday it asked them their comfort level on a video and a reel it would have been very low, right.

Speaker 2:

If I would have told them yesterday they were making a reel today, I wouldn't have shown up. I would have had them yesterday. They were making a reel. Today I wouldn't have shown up. I would have had his audience of zero.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, so. So I think you know one of the things that I would encourage our listeners, if you're not locked in to a, I'm going to call it this a social media strategy. Now, yeah, we can get variety of strategies from a variety of people. You know it's interesting and I don't normally do this, but you know LinkedIn, so I just got this. I got a LinkedIn message from a guy and I made a copy. Guy and I made a copy and the reason I'm reading this and I hesitate, but I think it speaks to the value of it, particularly as a real estate professional. Just think about what we need is prospects, sphere of influence, relationships. Mr Scott, thank you for accepting my connection request. Somebody asked for a connection request. A little lesson learned Now.

Speaker 1:

I knew this person, but I almost connect with everybody after I do a little digging right. I saw you on LinkedIn and was immediately flooded with great memories of you. I remember your kind words, your support and your genuine nature during my time at Providence Day School. You always made it a point to speak to me, encourage me as a person and as a basketball player. That really meant a lot, so much that 25 years later, I remember it. Thank you. I hope you and your family are doing well. So obviously, to nobody's surprise, I will be having coffee with that person after 25 years, in probably 25 days, with the 4th of July and whatnot. So I didn't read that. That was not about me, so I don't want anybody to misunderstand. It's the power of connectivity, and the other thing that I would encourage people to do is, when you post something and you get likes, if nothing else, like the like back or like the comment back. Excuse me, Yep.

Speaker 1:

One of the things that I've started to do is to go in and I look at all the people that like and if there's somebody that I try to take three per, don't always do it and DM them, particularly if I haven't seen or heard from them in 20 years. And Because and again I don't mean to interrupt, but most of these people don't live here in the Carolinas, that's right. Most of these people are my high school and college friends who live all across the country. Well, guess what? I have created, subconsciously, unconsciously, this incredible referral network, because I now simply let them know that I know you and or your family member, you are going to want to move to the Carolinas, because everyone else is yes and let me help, right. So again, I want people to. Really I've done one reel and I think I did it accidentally and it was my most viewed thing I ever did, Right, but and it was probably with my kids, but I didn't even know I did it.

Speaker 2:

Well, and I also, I do believe that there is a social fatigue I know that you had mentioned that earlier and I do think that there is and I think that there's still a time and a place where, like you said, you take three people that made that comment and you send them a direct message. What I like to do every day, one of the things I like to write two personal notes based off of social media. Right, everyone's out there and they're making posts about things. They're saying what their kids are doing. They're saying what they're doing Sometimes they share with you when they lose a pet, a parent, a loved one. Write the card, take it off of social media, take it back to pen and paper and write the card. And, as an adult, we get bills, we get windows by Anderson in our mailbox. We don't get cards.

Speaker 1:

So we discussed, we might discuss, and I think I'm looking at number five and I know we're going all over the place and I said, let's go old school. And you took number five, which was talk about handwritten notes, and you applied it to number two, which was social media, and then all of the incredible folks that I've had an opportunity to interview, that what I love is when I interview somebody and they share something new, and so bring back the personal note and use social media to determine the who and the what. I love that Brilliant, brilliant. The who and the what. I love that Brilliant, brilliant Again. As we all know, our goal of Reality Podcast is for everybody to take three things, not 10, not 20. Find three that you can do tomorrow.

Speaker 1:

And don't get ready to get ready. That's right. This one is a slam dunk. One is a slam dunk, so let's talk a little bit about AI. It was not on my list, so tell me where Carissa Tucker is on what I call the AI continuum and number one. Do you use it? If so, how do you use it? Do you recommend using it? What concerns do you have about using it? So you are the first guest to talk AI, so welcome to me. Moving out of denial into complete acceptance of artificial intelligence. I happened to hear a speaker last week, so I'm feeling a little smarter than I was seven days ago.

Speaker 2:

Well, yes To answer. Yes, I use AI. Yes, I use chat GPT. Many people don't know that they've been using AI for a really long time, with your smartphone and the little camera and how it tracks your face. So, right, you've already been using it, gary. You've already been using it. So, but when it comes to AI and the chat GPT that everybody's been talking about, I do believe that if you are not using it, it's kind of similar to if you were using Craigslist to post your real estate ad and you're not using the platforms of today. It's ancient, right. So, in order for you to stay current, this is where we're at in technology, but the way that you use it needs to be smart, because it is not a human, it is not your own brain, and, yes, you can prompt it, but, at the end of the day, for me, it is used for social media. For me, right? No-transcript.

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Gary Scott

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