Understanding Behaviour wiith Vic O’Farrell

Release Date: 13 Jan 2025

Host(s):

• Adam Carter
• Louise Baxter MBE (LouBax)

Guest(s):

• Vic O’Farrell – Behavioural and Personality Expert, Founder of Queen of Behaviours

Episode Summary:

In this episode of the Consumer Friend Podcast, Adam and Louise are joined by Vic O’Farrell, also known as the Queen of Behaviours, to delve into the transformative power of DISC profiling. This personality and behavioural assessment tool can unlock insights into how we communicate, work, and build relationships.

Vic explains the four core DISC traits—Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Compliance—and how they impact our daily interactions. Whether you’re trying to improve workplace dynamics, enhance customer relationships, or better understand yourself, DISC profiling offers practical, actionable benefits.

Listeners will learn how understanding behavioural styles can lead to stronger teams, more empathetic communication, and personal growth. Vic also shares how businesses can use DISC to improve team performance and create more meaningful customer interactions.

Key Takeaways:

What Is DISC Profiling?
DISC is a behavioural profiling tool that identifies four key traits:

• D (Dominance): Results-driven and action-focused 
• I (Influence): Energetic and people-oriented
• S (Steadiness): Supportive and stability-focused
• C (Compliance): Detail-oriented and analytical.

Vic  provides a deep dive into how these traits manifest and how they shape our behaviours.

1. Why DISC Matters
   By understanding DISC traits, individuals and organisations can improve communication, foster collaboration, and resolve conflicts more effectively.
2. DISC in the Workplace
   Vic highlights how DISC profiling can help leaders and teams adapt their styles to create more cohesive, productive work environments.
3. Self-Awareness and Personal Growth
   DISC isn’t just for organisations—it’s also a tool for self-discovery. By recognising your own strengths and challenges, you can better understand how to interact with others and thrive in your personal and professional life.
4. Get Your Profile Done with Vic
   Interested in exploring DISC for yourself? Visit Queen of Behaviours to book a personalised session with Vic.

Resources & Links:

• Queen of Behaviours – DISC Profiling with Vic O’Farrell
• Consumer Friend Website – For more consumer tips and resources.

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Transcript

[00:00:08] Adam: Hey everyone, and welcome back to the Consumer Friend podcast, your go to for all things consumer rights, tips and tricks for protecting yourself in today's fast paced world. I'm your host, Adam Carter. And as always, I'm here with brilliant Louise Baxter, a. k. a. Lou Bax. Hi, Lou. How are you? 

[00:00:26] LouBax: I've got a cold.

[00:00:27] LouBax: But apart from that, I'm not going to moan about it for the whole podcast, though. Just so you know. Because you wouldn't allow that. 

[00:00:34] Adam: So I've put in here, Louise will say something about gardening or the temperature. 

[00:00:38] LouBax: It's not, the temperature's fine. 

[00:00:40] Adam: Yes. 

[00:00:40] LouBax: The temperature is fine and I haven't done any gardening because I've been playing sport all weekend because I'm so sporty and so athletic and so young.

[00:00:48] Adam: Okay, you're neither, none of those actually. I was going to say neither of those, but you're none of those. But good effort for trying. 

[00:00:54] LouBax: Yeah, it's a try. I always get like an A for enthusiasm. Always. 

[00:00:58] Adam: Yeah. We've got [00:01:00] a really, really fun podcast lined up today. As you know, uh, season four with sees us bringing in kind of industry experts to dive deep into the issues we talk about on this podcast.

[00:01:10] Adam: And today's guest is a true behavioral and personality expert. Ever felt that you struggle to get your point across that you feel like no one is understanding what you're trying to say, that https: otter. ai

[00:01:28] Adam: We are thrilled to have Vic, the Queen of Behaviors. Vic is an incredible speaker and has years of experience helping businesses understand consumer behavior. But don't worry, today's episode is all about how we as people can better understand ourselves and make smarter choices. Vic runs Queen of Behaviors, a platform where she teaches businesses how to design better interactions and how to lead effective teams.

[00:01:51] Adam: Vic's mission is simple, help people provide an environment for others and themselves to thrive. Hi Vic, how are you? [00:02:00] 

[00:02:00] Vic: Well, hello, hello Adam and Lou. Great to be here, for inviting me. 

[00:02:06] Adam: Thank you so much for coming on. I'm excited. Yeah, it's, it's, it's. I 

[00:02:09] LouBax: love this stuff, I love it, it's brilliant this stuff, it's brilliant.

[00:02:13] Adam: So Vic, I first met you in 2019. You came into our team to provide some personality profiling on everyone in the team and it was something called DISC and it absolutely fascinated me. I answered a few simple questions and all of a sudden I had my entire personality written on a piece of paper and it was scary.

[00:02:35] Adam: It was absolutely scary. So I guess let's just start with Okay. Who are you? What do you do? And why do you do what you do? 

[00:02:45] Vic: Oh, well, you've just given a great introduction there. So yeah, I am Vicka O'Farrell, I'm the Queen of Behaviors. And I have for the last 13 years, I've been running this business. And it starts when we think about our behaviors, if you think of it like a big Spanish [00:03:00] onion, and all those different layers and impact who we are and why we do say and react the way we do.

[00:03:05] Vic: And at the center of it, to me is our personality, because that's one part of our behavior. that doesn't fundamentally change over the years. You know, if you think about our dominant personality style, our strongest style generally stays the same. And the others around, because when it comes to disc, and I'll talk a little bit more about that, there's like four parts of the personality, and it all depends on where it sits on your graph, depends on how much it impacts how you behave.

[00:03:32] Vic: So I say that's at the heart of the Spanish onion and then we layer everything else on core values, limiting beliefs, hereditary things, life's, life's experiences because, you know, we change how we behave based on how people have behaved with us over the years. So yeah, that's what I do. Why do I do it? I bloody love it actually.

[00:03:54] Vic: You know, if you find something that you love, doing and you get paid for [00:04:00] it. I mean, it's a win win. I, I, I, I don't feel like I'm going to work because I'm going to help people to help themselves and others around them. It's great. I love it. 

[00:04:12] Adam: We did it. We did our dis profiling back in 2019. So shall we just quickly just touch on, on, Go on Louise, I know you want to say something.

[00:04:19] Adam: I was just going to say, I love this. Louise's personality profile is going to mean that she interrupts. 

[00:04:24] LouBax: I do, but also, also as well, like, so, just backing up what Vic said, so I had mine done in 2019 and again in 2022 for a different job, so I had them done in a different thing and Vic did them both, and like, they came out exactly the same.

[00:04:38] LouBax: Exactly the same. And the way that the person, I know we'll go into it a little bit more, but the way that it works is it shows you where you are, what is it, your true self, your external self, and then your self under 

[00:04:48] Vic: pressure? Yes, the disk profiling system that I use, yes. Your true self is you as you wake up in the morning before anything of the day has impacted you.

[00:04:57] Vic: And then when I send out my links, because [00:05:00] I'm generally doing it in a working environment, I say think, answer these questions in a working environment because sometimes you might go, Oh, Not like that at home, but I am like that at work and and so in order to get a true Understanding what you're like in the working environment you do that So some people's profiles don't change at all But some people's just different parts of the profile will change you'll be like, oh, well, hold on a minute You know, you need to work to your your best behavioral style.

[00:05:25] Vic: And then yes, there's a middle graph, which is us under pressure 

[00:05:28] Adam: I know Louise likes to kind of jump off into into the future and into the sunset leaving everyone behind her but should we just take this back a notch or two and kind of go what is sorry Louise I'm just going to spend the whole podcast taking the piss out 

[00:05:43] LouBax: of you.

[00:05:45] LouBax: Like, just dissecting my what is amazing personality profile is what you're actually going to do. 

[00:05:51] Adam: So what is the DISC model? What does DISC actually stand for? So it's a personality profiling system, yeah? 

[00:05:59] Vic: Yes, [00:06:00] it is, Adam, and you're doing your very greenness of like, some people might not understand this so we need to take everyone on the journey.

[00:06:06] Vic: So yeah, I use the DISC system, which was in 1928, a gentleman called Dr. William Marston He published his studies of the emotions of normal people, but you could go way back in history to Empedocles and Hippocrates talking about the four element and the The four fluids that run through your body.

[00:06:23] Vic: There's always been, there's always been stuff out there about personalities and there's lots of other profiling tools and there's lots of more modern day one. But I love the DISC system because it's simple and easy to understand. So when I came across it, when I was doing my coaching qualification with the coaching Academy and it was, I've done loads of different profiling over the years in my corporate role, but nothing really kind of, I love the day, you know, cause it was like, Ooh, I love it.

[00:06:49] Vic: But knowing my own personality style, I just, you know, I went off the next day and got distracted by bright, shiny things like Lou does, and go, Oh, no, should we do? No, let's go [00:07:00] charging off into the sunset and let's forget all about that. Um, so it's, it looks at four different areas of your personality. So DISC stands for Dominant, Influence, Steadiness and Compliance.

[00:07:11] Vic: It's all about how you deal with problems and challenges. how you interact with other people, the pace at which you work, and also what you do with when it comes to details and rules and regulations. And depending on how that impacts your personality, we just show on a graph. You know, so the D is a red.

[00:07:31] Vic: So some people just talking colors, but a D is red and it's dominant. Like Lou's got high red. Cause she just wants to go out and solve problems and take over the world. 

[00:07:40] Adam: Yeah. Well, she's, she's the ideal prime minister. She's up there with, with all the, uh, all the greats, Putin, Trump. 

[00:07:50] LouBax: Oh, literally. 

[00:07:55] Adam: I'm joking.

[00:07:55] Adam: They went Prime Minister even. I'm so sorry, that was so [00:08:00] uncalled for. As someone who needs harmony, I shouldn't have said that, I do apologise. 

[00:08:04] LouBax: Not just needs harmony, Adam should not be made to work on his own. 

[00:08:08] Adam: Absolutely. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of that. But you say 

[00:08:11] LouBax: that 

[00:08:12] Vic: Adam, you know, up there with all the grades, everyone needs to be read to be prime minister that they don't.

[00:08:19] Vic: If I take you to some prime ministers, I'm not sure the age of who's listening here, but if you look at in Britain here, so yeah, Thatcher was very much a red style personality. That's how she dealt with things. But if you went to someone like Tony Blair, He was very much more the yellow, very much more the fun, the getting out there, doing all of that, and being everywhere, and just being jolly.

[00:08:42] Vic: And then you're green, so greens are very hard, much harder, I would say, to read, because they become that kind of chameleon, and because they're looking out for everyone else, and they're great diplomats. So someone like John Major, I would say, was probably green. And then you've got [00:09:00] the, uh, Gordon Brown. He was probably your, your ideal kind of blue candidate.

[00:09:05] Vic: So they're very different styles. That's also, you know, both of the different, um, main, main political parties, and it's not about was one better than the other at leading it. Because actually every style brings its own. Benefits its own strengths, all of those other great things that make it a leader. And when actually, when I'm doing this in the workplace, people go to me, Oh, so in order to be a CEO, you need to have a red personality.

[00:09:34] Vic: So I'm like, well, not necessarily you actually don't. If you take something like I would say, um, Virgin Richard Branson. Now, what we see in the world is probably a very yellow personality style. Yeah. You know, the Virgin adverts have got Richard Branson in them. It's all about me and it's very showy and a very, very much about me.

[00:09:59] Vic: Yeah. When [00:10:00] you look at something successful like Microsoft, where you've got a Bill Gates as the head. Bill Gates is far more reserved, far more task focused, far more blue in the C style of personality. You don't see him. He doesn't need to be in his adverts. He's not all about him. He's all about actually just having a successful organization and he will surround himself with people who are different to him.

[00:10:26] Vic: And I think that's the big thing for me is. When you know your own style, I know, so I'm very, you know, Lou, you're also very yellow as well. You've got red there, but you're probably lead with yellow like I do. Sunshine yellow. And sometimes I know, and I, I only do it because this is what I do for a living.

[00:10:45] Vic: And it's the emotional intelligence part of it. It's like, do you know what? Sometimes I need to shut up. Sometimes I need to let other people speak. Sometimes I just need to know not everyone, is interested in my stories. [00:11:00] But when I'm with someone that's like Lou, who is, you know, I can go and meet Lou for a coffee.

[00:11:06] Vic: And we'll sit down and the next thing we know it's like, oh my god, we've been here an hour. Right, haven't even got to the point of what we came to meet to talk about, we've just spent an hour talking about what's going on in life. I 

[00:11:14] Adam: can spend an hour with Lou and not say a word. 

[00:11:17] Vic: That's 

[00:11:22] LouBax: But also Vic, we've had the conversation before, haven't we?

[00:11:26] LouBax: Where but also, so like, I mean, I, and I'm not saying it like in an arrogant way, but I think I, I'm quite aware of myself as well and the need to shut up and that emotional intelligence piece. But sometimes when you meet somebody that's like us, they can grate on us. Like, uh, somebody that's the same as us.

[00:11:41] LouBax: I'm like, oh my God, they're the same as me. That's so irritating. . 

[00:11:48] Vic: Why? It's, it's, do you know what? I think the part of it is like, not just the shutting up bit. So, so the, I, the sunshine yellow. So you've got dominant problems and challenges. I sunshine yellow, all about being [00:12:00] influential and it's all about interacting with other people, but a way to the eyes, give themselves away is their storytelling.

[00:12:06] Vic: And so when you're with people, you're in a group of people and someone starts saying about what they were doing at the weekend or that they playing a sport. You know the eyes because they jump in and they take over with a story generally about themselves and then let no one shut up. And that is the part of the eye that I find irritating.

[00:12:28] Vic: I'm just like this, I'm talking, this isn't about you, this is about me. And when I want you to join in, I will stop and let you join in. But eyes don't wait for the gap. Whereas someone like Adam, who's very green. He, I know you're very green and yellow, so you're very S and I, Adam, but you're more likely to wait and be invited to the conversation, not like Adam, now it is your turn to speak invited, but you'll wait for a gap and join in.

[00:12:57] Vic: On a team's 

[00:12:59] Adam: [00:13:00] meeting, I will put my hand up. I'll raise my hand. No matter if it's, if it's, if I'm, if I'm with friends or whatever, I will raise my hand and I'll wait for someone to say, Adam, you can speak. 

[00:13:09] Vic: Yeah. And that's just who you are. It's just who you are. I'll tell you what, actually, when you, in lockdown.

[00:13:16] Vic: Yeah. So when I was having to run everything on zoom, I found it exhausting. Because the outgoing, so the D's and the I's, didn't know that you put your hand up, wait to be invited, no, just unmute, unmute, in they come, in they come. I'm here. My god, my reserved people are really struggling, so I just used to have to say, Lou, can you, can you re mute yourself please, because I just want to hear from Adam.

[00:13:42] Vic: And that part of running a program was very exhausting on, um, online. It's easier in the room. Because you just don't even make eye contact. You just ignore people and you just spit to 

[00:13:51] Adam: the other person. Everything, everything is easier face to face. I think for me, the most fascinating part of it, or the best, maybe the best part of it was that not only did I [00:14:00] have my, my diagnosis of who I was on a piece of paper staring at me going, wow, and I'm like, wow, this is amazing.

[00:14:10] Adam: What it also meant for me was that And I think I said this at the last training session that we did with you, was it, it allowed, it, it gave me permission to be me, it did, it, it meant that I didn't have to try and, and, and quash some of the characteristics and the traits that I necessarily, not that I don't like about myself, that I, I think I need to change, because I can't change them, I need to kind of embrace who I am, and it's, and it allowed me to be more me, if that makes sense.

[00:14:36] Vic: But it probably also allowed you to see the strengths that you bring to a team and not have them shown to you as a weakness. You know, because we get those blind spots, you know, and what we don't, Oh, Adam, come on, stop seeing everything from everyone else's point of view. Can't you speed up a bit? Oh, Adam, you know, as opposed to, hold on a minute, let's ask Adam what he thinks [00:15:00] because actually he's got value to bring to the team and everybody has a value.

[00:15:05] Vic: You can't surround yourself in business. If you're, especially if you're growing a business, you cannot employ everyone that's like you and you tend to attract similar styles. So you, you tend to naturally migrate to people who are similar to you. Actually, even when you were at school, do you remember being at school?

[00:15:22] Vic: Would you have, we would label people at school and we shouldn't label people, but you would, I used to label people like, Oh, Oh, the boffins over there or the clowns, you know, or the shy ones or, or the nerdy ones or the bullies. You know, you labelled people, but actually it's just because they were different to me and I liked hanging out with all the clowns because I was a clown.

[00:15:44] LouBax: Yeah, 

[00:15:44] Vic: I 

[00:15:44] LouBax: mean, we, I mean, Adam and I are still friends with all the kids we went to school with. I mean, we pretend that Adam went to school with us, but he didn't actually go to school with us, he went to college with us. But like, there's 13 of us that went to school together and actually that would be really interesting to map out what those people were.

[00:15:59] LouBax: Adam, that would be [00:16:00] very broad. Can we just summarize, just quickly, so I think we, so we what, so D is dominant I is influencers, influence. S is stead steadiness and C is consistent Compliance. Compliance. I'm not very high on either of those S or Cs. And, and also 

[00:16:19] Adam: generally you, you, you'll have one that is higher than the, than everything else.

[00:16:22] Adam: Uh, but you'll also have a secondary one mainly. Does, does that work that way? 

[00:16:27] Vic: Well, you know, you can, you can, it can be three. So yeah, you, your strongest style, which is the one that comes up first, but your secondary style could be quite close to it. And it depends. So me, I am a yellow red, but when I'm under pressure, I am a red yellow.

[00:16:43] Vic: So they, they do change slightly, but you tend to find that. Through life, your strongest side is your strongest stuff. Some people I do profiles and they've only got one above the line. And that's fine. It's, it's not an, it's not an issue. There's no right or wrong when it comes to personalities. There's no like, Oh, that [00:17:00] you're to this, you'll do that.

[00:17:00] Vic: It's just actually just recognizing, understanding and respecting that we're all different. We all bring something to the party. Like I have to surround myself. So in the Queens council of my business, there's six of us and I've got two blues in there. Because I know I don't do detail. So that's the C compliant.

[00:17:21] Vic: It's all about rules and regulations, detail, you know, me, that's the rules and regulations. It's just merely a suggestion. But it's also, it's 

[00:17:29] Adam: things 

[00:17:30] Vic: like. the detail of getting things correct. You know, I can type proposals out and I, I, because I've typed it, I can't see the typos that I've made. I mean, I, I used to be what I would call tippity tapped it, send on an email, you know, I'd be sending an email or a WhatsApp as they are these and, and as I press send, That's when I read to check for spelling.

[00:17:53] Vic: Yeah, 

[00:17:54] Adam: yeah.

[00:17:59] Vic: Not before I press send. [00:18:00] Every time. Luckily, they've introduced that edit button. Edit. This has blown my mind. It's like saved my life, actually. The edit function. But I, because I do this, and because I have the emotional intelligence of knowing my personality style, I know full well if I'm sending a business proposal, if I'm sending something.

[00:18:14] Vic: I've been to, I've seen someone are now sending the proposal of everything that I do. I have to make sure that everything in that pack is detailed. It's, it's correct because if somebody is a blue personality style, so if I've got somebody who is C compliant and my covering email has got typos in it, they probably will dismiss me as a supplier even before they've looked at the detail in it.

[00:18:38] Vic: Because I'm not being compliant and correct, they're thinking, well, how can I deal with somebody that doesn't have the same standards as them? And they're not sitting there reading it as a blue style, as in thinking, well, I'm blue, and therefore it's all got to be correct. They're just reading it as they would consume it.

[00:18:55] Adam: So this is where it comes in when, um, I said in the, the [00:19:00] introduction around being surrounded by idiots. So I mentioned to you before we started the podcast that I've been reading a book called Surrounded by Idiots. And it was quite controversial apparently when it first came out. That talks about the fact that you're not surrounded by idiots, you're just surrounded by people that, think differently to you.

[00:19:15] Adam: And that's a great thing. 

[00:19:18] Vic: Yeah, it is. It's like I say, it's all about recognising, understanding, respecting that we're all different. You know, if I wanted to do something where I needed to get everybody involved and I just want to know what everyone's thought process is about it. But, you know, that's the kind of thing I'd say, Adam, I know that you're really good at getting the best out of others.

[00:19:37] Vic: So can, can you go in and do this bit of research with the team? Whereas if I needed somebody to go and. Basically kicked some butt and maybe made some tough decisions. I'd be like, Lou, some tough decisions need to be made. And this message has got to be delivered and on point. Can you, uh, can you be delivering that for me?

[00:19:55] Adam: The benefits of people knowing about the other people's [00:20:00] traits, characteristics within teams, even in personal life is, is there kind of there to see it can really help teams. communicate better with everyone around them if they understand how best to communicate with those people, right? 

[00:20:14] LouBax: It's self awareness though, Ads, isn't it?

[00:20:16] LouBax: It's like being aware of yourself and just going, oh, they might not like that. 

[00:20:20] Adam: I just want to just, just quickly mention the third paragraph in Louise's bio for her DISC profile. 

[00:20:27] LouBax: Oh, Adam! 

[00:20:29] Adam: Louise is often viewed by others as overconfident or conceited. Louise may appear aggressive, especially when communicating with people who like to pay attention to all the fine points.

[00:20:42] Adam: Louise is optimistic and tends to overestimate the abilities of others because of their high trust, optimism, and confidence in others around them. That's nice though, isn't it? You've got confidence. That's nice. Started 

[00:20:54] LouBax: off badly. Well, I mean, we did start off this podcast with you going, I'm literally, I'm Going to [00:21:00] hammer you in this podcast.

[00:21:01] LouBax: So that's how it started off, but my, I'm a, I'm a persuader. That's what I want to do. You're an extremely outgoing 

[00:21:07] Adam: and social person. You tend to make friends easily, and you like to have fun with others. You want to make commitments, even when you're unable to keep them. 

[00:21:17] LouBax: Yeah, but you know, as well, like we talk about this, like the magpie effect, like say, because Adam and I are both quite high eyes that sometimes we'll be like, Oh, that's shiny over there.

[00:21:27] LouBax: And I have to, we have to be so good at going, write it down, write it down, write it down. We do, we do, we are getting better at writing stuff down. But the problem is running your own organization. So within the realms of the day job, there are, there are things that you have to do. We don't have. those rules or regulations because we can go, don't have to do that, which is dangerous sometimes.

[00:21:50] LouBax: You 

[00:21:51] Vic: need to make sure you've got people around you that do do that. Yeah. Yeah. Well, it's like, well, that's why I outsource my account. Absolutely. I can run my own books. I'm [00:22:00] not, I'm not stupid, so I could do it, but it exhausts me. I don't enjoy it. And I, you know, I'm just like, oh, it's boring. I don't want to do that.

[00:22:08] Vic: So. Why, why would I do something that doesn't bring me fulfillment? It's like when you said that I said at the start of this, you know, I do a job that I love. So standing up, delivering talks, keynoting at conferences, you know, being in front of people talking is absolutely brings me joy. I know it probably scares the bejesus out of some people, but that's what brings me joy.

[00:22:31] Vic: So when you're in a business, when you understand people's personalities, you can also understand their motivators. So if I was doing things like this, I wouldn't, anyone that was yellow, I'd be thinking, Oh, I'm not going to get them to go and look through that spreadsheet and find me the faults because that will just, they'll leave.

[00:22:48] Vic: You've got to give people the things that, that bring them joy and motivate them. Otherwise people leave organization because they go, you know, even how you manage people. Lou, you can't manage everyone with big Lou [00:23:00] personality because big Lou personality doesn't work for the blues and the greens of this world.

[00:23:04] Adam: Well, I've got something on that. The, the absolutely gorgeous, beautiful Lou is motivated by flattery, praise, popularity, and 

[00:23:13] LouBax: acceptance. It's true. It's true story, but that's what I mean. It's like it is. I like, I like a badge. I like people to go well done. I do. I like a badge. That human being but also I'm aware of that as well and I'm also aware that sometimes I have to go I can't be like, Oh my God, everyone, everybody look at me.

[00:23:35] LouBax: It's about me because then you are a knob and I don't want to be an op. So I am very acutely aware of myself. Like, like even this morning we're having me and Adam were having jokes about it. And he's like, send me your personality profile. And I was like, no. Heroes wear capes, Adam, that's what mine says.

[00:23:52] LouBax: Like, so we have jokes about it because you're really aware of it. Like, Adam is, like, sometimes, I'm like, you're so passive, it's just irritating me. [00:24:00] Yeah, yeah, yeah, but that's 

[00:24:00] Adam: who I am, Louise. 

[00:24:01] LouBax: And it irritates, but I can go. And he goes, well, you're being too aggressive. And I'm like, let's have a time out then.

[00:24:07] Vic: So, so this will be, so you've both got yellow. So when you're both in your yellow eye space, Yeah, and you're both being outgoing people focused influence. You're just jelling, you're just jelling. But your second profile, Lou, is the D dominant red style and Adam, you go green S steadiness and the, and the red and the green will have conflict.

[00:24:31] Vic: So if you're together in your yellow style, it just gels, it just flows. But if Adam's in his green and Lou's in her red, absolutely, you need to take time out because Lou's going to be wanting to move things on and do this kind of hand gesture, like, come on, Adam, quick, speed up, speed up, and Adam's going, whoa, whoa, whoa, no, don't, don't.

[00:24:46] Adam: I try and slow Louise down a lot. I'm always trying to go, hang on, Lou, just calm down, let's think about what we did last week rather than think about what we've now got to do in three weeks time. 

[00:24:57] LouBax: He also, but also you do it, [00:25:00] you manage me quite well in the way that he'll go, I can't think at that pace and it 

[00:25:05] Adam: makes me feel 

[00:25:05] LouBax: stressed.

[00:25:06] Adam: I'm flattering you by saying you're such a quick thinker, you're so wonderful in everything that you do. However, I'm not, I'm not as good as you, Louise. 

[00:25:13] LouBax: That's not what you're, no, that's not, well, that isn't the motivator for me. Don't be that person, Adam Carter. That's not, the motivator for me is I don't want to make you feel bad.

[00:25:23] LouBax: So by you saying that, I'm like, Oh God, I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm making him feel stressed. I don't want you to feel stressed just because of who I am. So that, that's the motivator for me. It's not the flattery. Thank you very much. 

[00:25:34] Adam: Vic, I feel this is like a therapy session. This is just, all we're just having is an absolute therapy session.

[00:25:40] Adam: It's wonderful. How much do I owe 

[00:25:43] Vic: you? No, but what you have said there is, is correctly, it's like, while Lou loves to thank for praise, all of that, she actually has a fear of rejection because her yellow is high. And so by, by you saying that she's stressing you, she's like, oh my god, Adam's not, Adam's not liking me at the moment.

[00:25:58] Vic: I need to, I need to stop because I [00:26:00] want Adam to like me again. I don't want to upset Adam. So she's gone from red, then she's flipped over to her green, and you then probably go yellow, sorry. She's gone from a red to a yellow, And then Adam, you've probably gone from your green to your yellow, and then you're back in your joint zone of yellowness.

[00:26:15] Vic: You just then have to realize that sometimes chit chatting away doesn't get the job done. 

[00:26:20] Adam: No. Like, I mean, I'd say, for example, I have got, I've got about 15 questions that I was supposed to ask you, Vic, and I haven't asked a single one of them right now. And, and, and, and I, and I do that through all our podcasts.

[00:26:34] Adam: I set it up, I script, script the beginning, I do the bios, I do all that kind of stuff. By the time I get to talking, I'm just in chat mode, and I forget about all the other things that I was supposed to ask, and I'm just talking now. 

[00:26:49] LouBax: Can I, right, so whilst we just did a little bit of my personality profile, can I just read a little bit of Adam's?

[00:26:55] LouBax: Just so people can see. I don't 

[00:26:57] Adam: think there's any need, I think it just says that he's a wonderful [00:27:00] person, I think that's all it says. 

[00:27:01] LouBax: Advisors! can be overly tolerant and patient with those who are non producers in the workspace because of an overwhelming desire to maintain a healthy and nurturing environment.

[00:27:11] LouBax: Which is when I'm like, Adam! 

[00:27:13] Adam: It's lovely, isn't it? Kick it up! 

[00:27:14] LouBax: Yes, it 

[00:27:15] Adam: is! It's a beautiful thing to have, beautiful characteristic. 

[00:27:17] LouBax: It is. Because you won't, you'll never, there's never any ag. You won't have ag unless you're really pushed. You have to be really pushed for you to then, and then you'll be like, ooh, been told 

[00:27:28] Vic: off.

[00:27:28] Vic: Yes. But sometimes you have to be aware as well, Adam, that if you're working with a loo who's in a red mode, that actually that kind of pace and that kind of style could come across as a bit passive aggressive, because it's just like, oh, is Adam saying yes to all of this? But I know he's not going to do it, because, you know, In order for Adam to actually just get some peace and quiet, he'll just agree.

[00:27:53] Vic: I'm just going to agree. I'm going to just shut 

[00:27:56] LouBax: you up. It's easier. It is passive like that [00:28:00] sometimes. Yeah. Cause it is passive or it's just like, yeah, yeah. Dismissive. 

[00:28:03] Adam: I'm so sorry, Louise, for being dismissive. 

[00:28:06] LouBax: I will try harder in the 

[00:28:08] Adam: future. 

[00:28:09] LouBax: Oh Adam, I love you with all of my being, you know that? Like literally, your greatest fear is loss of social acceptance.

[00:28:18] LouBax: That chimes. Mine's similar as well, but this is what I mean, because we've done a lot of work on this, and we use it in some of our other training stuff we do around ensuring that you're providing an inclusive services to business, because it's about that communication. So having that awareness of yourself, When you're talking to customers or to anybody, it's all consumers or whomever we're talking to is having an understanding that whilst we might think, and I, I like candid direct approaches because there's no room for interpretation.

[00:28:46] LouBax: I'm not questioning, or do they like me? Do they not what the situation I'd rather somebody was just like direct. And I didn't have to read the room, but not everybody. communicates like that and it's having an awareness about when that's appropriate and when that's not isn't it to [00:29:00] ensure that you bring people along but also when we're talking about businesses supporting consumers communicating in a way that they, that people understand and aren't instantly put off by.

[00:29:10] LouBax: Yeah, you, 

[00:29:12] Vic: so they always say that they are treat others how you wish to be treated and when it comes to our values absolutely, But when it comes to communication, no, communicate with others how they wish to be communicated with. But generally, if you're doing something and you've no idea, the audience, you don't, you don't know who's in the audience.

[00:29:30] Vic: You don't know, is it loads of D's or I's or S's or C's. So you have to make sure that when you communicate, it appeals to everyone. And that's the tricky part. You know, it's a bit like an email communication. Don't put all of the detail in the email communication, put enough in there that satisfies the D's.

[00:29:47] Vic: Make it fun enough for the eyes, make it, make it sure it's engaging for everyone and takes everyone on the journey for the S's and for the blues that want the detail, the C's. Just add an attachment with all the detail on it. They'll [00:30:00] read it, but the others won't. Yeah, it's simple. When you say it like that, it's really simple, but lots of people don't do it.

[00:30:08] Vic: No, because people don't understand their personality. So this to me is the fundamentals of any business. You have to understand, we talk about diversity in the workplace, but you've got to understand the diversity of your personalities before you can even think about how I'm going to communicate with them.

[00:30:22] Vic: How am I going to manage them? How am I going to motivate them? What am I going to give them to do? Are they in the right job? Does it bring them joy? We spend so much time working. We have to make sure that we're all doing something that brings us joy. I love that. 

[00:30:36] Adam: It is absolutely right. You've got to be, yeah, you've got to enjoy it.

[00:30:40] Adam: We are, we are sadly coming to the end of the podcast. I haven't asked a single one of my questions, which is very upsetting. 

[00:30:47] LouBax: Not a shock though, Ads. It's also not 

[00:30:50] Adam: surprising. That's very, very true. Very, very true. Just in terms of kind of finishing up, you think how, how would a business or a person [00:31:00] go about getting their personality profile?

[00:31:02] Adam: Done. 

[00:31:03] Vic: Um, just get in contact with me via queenofbehaviours. com or my email's on there, my mobile's on there. You can just reach out and then I charge 55 plus back for a profile. But just doing a profile, you need to have, you know, some coaching with it or anything. And there's loads of other places out there that you can get it from, but just, yeah, get in contact and start the conversation.

[00:31:25] Adam: Very much recommend the profile and the, and the session that goes with it, because it really does help you to understand exactly who you are and who everyone else is as well, I think. 

[00:31:36] LouBax: And how you communicate better with those people in your team. It's really important to have that understanding and that you need.

[00:31:43] LouBax: So. Like, we've said before, that our team, when we've had this done before, it's a real mix of people, there's nobody that's got the same as, as me, and actually, that That works from that perspective, but I've got lots of people that are much better at the detail than I am, which is fortunate, or we'd be in a [00:32:00] terrible state.

[00:32:02] Adam: Well, you, you want, you want freedom from many rules and regulations, Louise, that's what you want. I 

[00:32:06] LouBax: don't, I don't like the rules and the regulations, like I'm with it, they're just there for guidance, just in the background, don't need them. Louise, 

[00:32:13] Adam: I think that is great because you do need regular compliments for achievements.

[00:32:22] LouBax: Oh, you love me, Adam Carter, so you can't help it. Absolutely 

[00:32:25] Adam: right, absolutely right. And I'm never allowed to tell you what to do, apparently. I should never be, I should never ignore your ideas or your accomplishments. 

[00:32:33] LouBax: You 

[00:32:33] Vic: don't. 

[00:32:33] LouBax: Well, 

[00:32:33] Adam: sometimes you interrupt. Oh, sorry. No, but what's great 

[00:32:36] Vic: is the fact that you, you both recognize it and you can have, you know, a bit of a joke about it.

[00:32:41] Vic: Because what, understanding your disc profile or any personality profile isn't an excuse for Labeling people, putting people in boxes or an excuse for bad behavior going, well, you just, that's just the way I am like, no, no, no, no, that's, it is who you are, but have a little bit of a, um, you know, self awareness, take, [00:33:00] take time to flex and adapt to the people that are around you because not everybody needs my irritating eye.

[00:33:07] Adam: It's, it's absolutely great. I would recommend any, any business certainly to do it, but even on a personal level, I'd recommend the disc profiling, uh, we'll put links to Queen of Behaviors in the show notes and the podcast notes below the line. Is that what it says? That's what they, if that's what they say, Vic, thank you, 

[00:33:25] LouBax: Adam.

[00:33:25] LouBax: I don't 

[00:33:26] Adam: know. I don't know. I've maybe listened to how to create a podcast podcast and maybe that's what that kind of thing they say. I don't know. I'm not too sure. Um, 

[00:33:37] LouBax: I, I 

[00:33:38] Adam: tend to go, Oh, that, that sounds good. And then I give up after five minutes. That's just generally 

[00:33:43] LouBax: half the book you've read.

[00:33:47] Adam: I'm now an expert. very much. Obviously. I know enough. I know enough. Vic, so much.

[00:33:58] Adam: I'm very aware that I don't. [00:34:00] Vic, thank you so much for coming on to our podcast. Uh, any final thoughts? 

[00:34:07] Vic: Just like I say, it's those three things of recognizing, understanding and respecting that we're all different and it's not right or wrong. We're We all just have to get along with each other. It's what makes the world go round.

[00:34:19] Adam: Absolutely. We're all different and that's a beautiful, wonderful thing. We need to be all different. 

[00:34:26] Vic: We do. And we need to understand the ripple effect of our own behaviours. 

[00:34:33] Adam: Thank you very much. Louise, uh, anything from you? 

[00:34:36] LouBax: No, I love this. I'm, I'm, I'm excited about this already. I'm just excited. 

[00:34:40] Adam: So long about it.

[00:34:41] Adam: It is, it is fascinating. It 

[00:34:44] LouBax: also is. I have to say that Vic, every time I meet with you, um, and just a real thank you for this. I always come away feeling massively energized by speaking with you. So thank you very much. Thank you for coming on today. Thank you so much. Massaged my, 

[00:34:56] Vic: um, massaged my yellow personality.[00:35:00] 

[00:35:02] Adam: As ever, consumer friend is here@consumerfriend.org uk. Please like, subscribe, share rate, review, help. Get our message out there and thank you very much for listening. Thank you, Vic. Bye-bye. 

[00:35:16] Vic: Bye for now. 

[00:35:17] Adam: And bye-bye, Lou. 

[00:35:19] Vic: Bye. 

[00:35:20] Adam: Thanks. Bye. 

[00:35:20] Vic: This is 

[00:35:22] LouBax: consumer friend.