Ep. 58 Being Happy with Me: Teen Body Changes and Self-Love

In this episode, I discuss about  body image issues faced by teenagers, sparked by a teen's story involving concerns over exercise due to body shame. There are physical and emotional changes during puberty that contribute to body image problems. 

 Self-compassion and acceptance,rather than the weight itself, influences body image. 

I present some practical tips for promoting self-love and strategies for building self-love. 

00:00 Introduction and Personal Story

00:53 Understanding Puberty and Body Changes

03:36 The Impact of Unhealthy Weight

04:41 The Importance of Self-Compassion

07:03 Research Insights on Body Image

08:47 Encouraging Healthy Behaviors

12:18 Conclusion and Practical Tips

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Transcript

  Hello, welcome to another episode.  Today I will be discussing something that I came across when I was talking with one of my teenagers. I asked her how she was doing and she said she was doing great with her.  with her nutrition, but she had problems with her exercise, like she didn't want to exercise.

And when I further asked what is the particular problem that she had during exercise, she mentioned that she felt ashamed to go out and even walk or run in her neighborhood because she felt that other people. would make fun of her. She didn't feel comfortable in her body going out and exercising.

That reminded me of a very important topic that it's about body image and in particular how teenagers perceived their body during the teenage years,  and I will take a step back before I go into the relationship between unhealthy weight and body image issues and mention first of all that puberty alone is risk factor, if we can call it, for creating body image issues in teenagers.

I don't know if you remember when you went through puberty. I know for me it was a very difficult period.  There are a lot of changes happen very quickly in teenagers bodies. And if We think about, puberty lasts about two to three years on average. So those are drastic changes that happen both in girls and boys.

So for girls, they start to have more breasts, they start to wear bra well before they didn't wear bra. They can have more acne, they grow more they may feel actually, they may actually grow taller than boys because Typically, girls tend to grow earlier than boys they have more fat around their belly, they have more fat around the hips area, and of course, they also have start to have periods, which is a very big change for girls.

And similar changes in boys during puberty they become, again, taller, their voice may get deeper, they start to have hair on their face, they start to shave, they can have hair in their body, in their legs, in their chest they have, of course, hair in the private area, both girls and boys, and they start to have a lot of body odor.

So those are a lot of changes that happen in a relatively short period of time. And those are like the physical changes. And there are, of course, emotional changes that happen along with those physical changes, because all the hormones during puberty also affect  the mental capacity of teenagers.

So it is not uncommon to have teenagers that are distressed as they go through puberty and they're trying to accept a new body. And this is regardless of whether their weight is in healthy range or in unhealthy weight. And then imagine if you have a teenager that goes through all those changes and on top of that. 

has to deal with unhealthy weight that adds another layer of risk factor to that effect. And that makes it even more difficult for a teenager to go through those changes. And when they don't feel comfortable, teenagers with their body, that, that is also. makes it more difficult for them to get into a healthy lifestyle, like the example that I mentioned with my the teenager I was working with, she had a hard time exercising because her, the way she perceived herself was an obstacle in her to even go out and and that really broke my heart when I heard that, and I decided to make this podcast and talk a little bit about those changes.

And the first thing I want to mention is that teenagers first need to have self compassion, like we all need to have self compassion, but especially teenagers. From it is a lot to go through all those changes. So compassion to yourself and accept whatever body it is that you are having right now.

Accept all those changes because they are happening without you having much control over those changes, at least the puberty changes. And  if you are in an unhealthy weight try to also accept where you are right now. That doesn't mean that you don't want to make make more positive changes.

But if you don't perceive yourself, if you don't have love for yourself while you're trying to make those changes, and if you actually don't love the body that you currently have, it's very difficult  to make those changes coming from a place of hate towards your body. So my first take home message to you is accept where you are.

Today,  this is what will help you move forward. , it's not really about how other people think of your body, even if right now you think is That you don't want other people to make fun of you or you don't feel comfortable running because other people may be looking at you. It is really  the way you look yourself that is the problem. 

If you feel comfortable with where you are right now, even if the whole world feels otherwise, it wouldn't have an effect on you. You would still go out and run even if there are people that may disapprove. of this activity, whatever you're doing. If you approve it for yourself, that's all you need.  You need yours, your own approval for your body.

You need your own approval for yourself. You need  yourself to love yourself, and you can go and do whatever you feel is best for yourself.  The second thing I want to mention is that there was a great study that actually investigated more thoroughly this matter of, for unhealthy body weight and puberty and how this is associated with body image.

The actual title of this manuscript is Weight Status and Body Image Perceptions in Adolescents Current Perspectives. This manuscript was published in Adolescent Health Medicine and Therapeutics . And what they mentioned very correctly in this is other studies that have shown that it's not the weight per se that creates body image in teenagers, rather it is how the teenagers internalize this  Body weight.

So what that means in simple language is that if there are two teenagers that they have the same weight, they have the same height, and one of them feels that I should be in a different weight than what I am right now, and the other one feels that this weight is okay, I love myself the way I look, and I will try to get healthier, and I will try to get into a healthier weight, those two teenagers do not experience the same weight gain.

The situation in the same way and factors that help teenagers have more of a healthy attitude towards how they are feeling in a certain weight and height have to do a lot of times with it. influence from their society. So influence that comes from friends and families. And this is where our role as adults is very important, where we want to ensure that we encourage our teenagers to love themselves.

We avoid making comments like you're fat, you're lazy You are eating junk all the time avoiding making comments to teenagers that make them feel ashamed of their body. That has has not been proven to be a productive way to get them to motivate them and get into a healthier weight. 

And also the problem can persist even more in adulthood,  studies have shown that teenagers that have a hard time accepting their body as teenagers, they Persist and have those problems even when they are adults, which tells us again that it's very important as we try to get, to help teenagers get into a healthier weight.

We need to encourage healthy ways of doing it so that these problems do not become even bigger and persist for many years into adulthood.   Another problem with body image issues is that teenagers that don't love themselves as it is in a certain time point, they are more likely to engage into unhealthy behaviors like Getting pills to act to lose weight that are not prescribed by doctors vomiting after meals so that they don't eat the food.

Excessive exercise, skipping meals. So  they're more likely to.  into this unhealthy behaviors that stem from this notion that they don't love their body and they want to come do something to change their body, but it  creates unhealthy habits. But if you are a teenager and If you have a certain body and you love your body, you still want to make changes with love, with compassion for yourself, then you're more likely to slowly create healthy habits and avoid these unhealthy behaviors.

Again I'm going back to the example that I had before, imagine if this teenagers felt good about her, herself, that would not have prevented her from going outside and exercise because she would feel comfortable with her body. Right there, you see an immediate effect of how you see your body and how it prevents you from going and taking a walk, from going and exercising. 

And of course, , there is a spectrum on the severity of the body image and sometimes it is necessary that teenagers work on a one on one with a therapist that specializes in body image problems and some of these unhealthy behaviors can also be extreme and may require professional support to get better.

So do not hesitate to ask for help if you think that is what is going on. So to summarize, what I wanted to I wanted you to take home from this episode is, first of all, Teenagers go through puberty changes, and that alone is a very difficult period that can be associated with body image issues.

If teenagers on top of that have unhealthy weight, that makes it even more difficult. So let's let's start by small actions of self love, small actions , that show we accept ourselves where we are. And from that point of self love, let's make some healthier choices. And it can be like a simple thing like making your.

hair look beautiful every day, going and putting beautiful clothes so that you'll appreciate your body. And, one simple exercise that I can propose and I have worked with some of the teenagers is to write down what you appreciate. On your body, what? Write down what you love about your body because even if you don't like some parts of your body I'm sure if you ask the question,

what is it in my body that I like, you're gonna find things that you like, but you just don't pay attention to them. So focus on those positive elements of your body and start to do small actions of self love. And  understand whether you could do better in terms of how you feel your body, because that was going to help you build healthy habits and sustainable, healthy lifestyle. 

So that's all I had for you today. I hope this was helpful. If you haven't sign up for my free resources, go to lifestyleforteens. com and look for free resources and where there you can find more helpful tips. And I will talk to you again next week, take care, bye.